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Funny Sex Innuendos

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

What's some of the funniest Innuendos you've heard to date?!

Two of my favourite ones I've heard are..

"christ, it's really tight around my crotch" (referring to a tight skirt)

"watch what you're doing with that, it's long and hard as fuck.." (being told to be careful with a scaffolding pole)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Two weeks I've had this red seesaw up my back passage (two old lady's talking about a present for grandchild that she been hiding from them lol) nearly choked on my tea

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Two weeks I've had this red seesaw up my back passage (two old lady's talking about a present for grandchild that she been hiding from them lol) nearly choked on my tea"

BA HAHAHA!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

"it tastes lovely when it's thick and creamy"

(taken from bake off TV programme, referring to their made whipped cream)... I was the only one howling in the room..

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

"this hole is really dark and deep to get into"

(Bear Grylls)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes it is tight when you slot it in to the hole

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Yes it is tight when you slot it in to the hole"

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By *ingAlMan
over a year ago

hereford

I hope your doughnuts turn out like Fannys, Johny Craddock

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

"Michelle doesn't go all the way down.."

Barack Obama criticising his wife's push up techniques

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

"This is a lovely horse. I once rode her mother"

Ted Walsh

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By *3xymamaWoman
over a year ago

Uptown Top Ranking

As seen on the book of the face

"Our muffins are moist and sticky, just like Fanny's"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dally Webster in corrie..... Not a single drop landed on her bush ...... Creasing here ha ha she's on about Tyrone painting ha ha seen just now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sally Webster in corrie..... Not a single drop landed on her bush ...... Creasing here ha ha she's on about Tyrone painting ha ha seen just now on tv

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By *exycouplemmmmCouple
over a year ago

Surrey

'Christmas is all about a good stuffing'

Mary Berry

Course it is Mary X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


""Michelle doesn't go all the way down.."

Barack Obama criticising his wife's push up techniques "

That is fucking outstanding

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

"some weeks nick likes to use fanny, other weeks he likes to do it by himself"

Golf commentator ken brown discussing nick faldo and his caddie, fanny sunneson

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"As seen on the book of the face

"Our muffins are moist and sticky, just like Fanny's""

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By *ountainwalkerMan
over a year ago

port talbot

Sexual innuendo is a hard topic to stay on top of. As a humor tool, it stands erect in the English language. While there are no hard and fast rules as to what constitutes sexual innuendo, many people have mass-debated over the ins-and-outs of the topic, and now the general principles at the root of the topic are firm and well-rounded. However, full penetration of the subject requires that the reader take a long, hard look at the target and be a cunning linguist in order to avoid limp phrases and imbibe the phrase with a large handful of meanings. The topic can become hot by attempting to grasp it, and the more one experiments with it, the more interested they become. Also, as the language changes innuendos must change in order to fill the newly created holes and satisfy listeners.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Sexual innuendo is a hard topic to stay on top of. As a humor tool, it stands erect in the English language. While there are no hard and fast rules as to what constitutes sexual innuendo, many people have mass-debated over the ins-and-outs of the topic, and now the general principles at the root of the topic are firm and well-rounded. However, full penetration of the subject requires that the reader take a long, hard look at the target and be a cunning linguist in order to avoid limp phrases and imbibe the phrase with a large handful of meanings. The topic can become hot by attempting to grasp it, and the more one experiments with it, the more interested they become. Also, as the language changes innuendos must change in order to fill the newly created holes and satisfy listeners."

I like you...

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