FabSwingers.com forum: Single 'swingers'

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So after prolonged talking and a date meet followed by some x rated action I agreed to be 'fb's' with someone on here. A conversation ensued about fab and emotions last night. He advised that he doesn't want a relationship or to hurt me at any point.

However a recent status about daytime meets has got him in a tizz and 'sorry but I cant see you again'.

In my opinion if something isn't heading to a monogamous relationship I'm free to behave however I like....

Agree? disagree? Similar experiences?

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By *ing692Man
over a year ago

bridgend

Agree

All or nothing in the hat I say

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By *ax-BangingMan
over a year ago

town

Agree

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How dare anyone meeting on this site wish to swing! That just unheard of

I agree with you though, enjoy and play away. I'm sure his wounds will heal.

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By *otsoSnowWhiteWoman
over a year ago

My Ice Castle! South Wales

If you've agreed with meeting other people and not exclusive to one another unless playing in a couples situation then there shouldn't of been a problem.

My personal opinion but I think sometimes men and women on here want all the bonuses of a relationship but not call it a relationship

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If you've agreed with meeting other people and not exclusive to one another unless playing in a couples situation then there shouldn't of been a problem.

My personal opinion but I think sometimes men and women on here want all the bonuses of a relationship but not call it a relationship "

Exactly. I like to call a spade a spade. We had the relationship/emotions/feelings talk last night, cleared that up as he's happy being single.

Then the minute I make a statement as a single female who actually likes swinging I got lambasted as 'its dangerous for you and me'.

Umm no sunshine if you don't want me as a girlfriend I sure as hell wont be acting like one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If it was the original agreement he shouldnt be getting even slightly possessive, sounds like he threw his toys out the pram! People get attached its what we are designed to do.. if anything hunni id feel a little flattered he wants you all to himself

Funny how he didnt raise alarm that he wasn't comfortable with you seeing other people..

Lady xx

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By *aydee65Man
over a year ago

Near Merthyr

I've encountered several people on here via meets,chats etc.. who truly believe that they are going to find a true-love, monogamous relationship on this site. Whilst I agree that its possible (and I'm sure there are many who've met on here and are blissfully happy) I can't help feeling that if that's what you're looking for you may be in the wrong place. Surely the key to success here is honesty - and as long as you're both wanting the same thing then thats fine, but some seem to just agree with things they are not happy with and thats not sustainable long term. Just my opinion.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If it was the original agreement he shouldnt be getting even slightly possessive, sounds like he threw his toys out the pram! People get attached its what we are designed to do.. if anything hunni id feel a little flattered he wants you all to himself

Funny how he didnt raise alarm that he wasn't comfortable with you seeing other people..

Lady xx "

I guess he did in hindsight with a "When a bird is mine she's mine" comment. Although I took that as relationship wise. Hence the arranging meets for next week. His loss

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I've encountered several people on here via meets,chats etc.. who truly believe that they are going to find a true-love, monogamous relationship on this site. Whilst I agree that its possible (and I'm sure there are many who've met on here and are blissfully happy) I can't help feeling that if that's what you're looking for you may be in the wrong place. Surely the key to success here is honesty - and as long as you're both wanting the same thing then thats fine, but some seem to just agree with things they are not happy with and thats not sustainable long term. Just my opinion."

If this is aimed at me I'm not looking for monogamous. I swang with an ex last year via a couple's profile.

Its a situation that seems to be on the rise on fab atm. Singles hooking up for fb/fwbs scenarios and then one or the other expecting fidelity.

I'll be far more careful next time someone asks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you met as fb then that's all it is and you free to see others when you want.

He might have thought that would see each other and if you see others it would be together.

It gets complicated at times but you can't get jealous and be a swinger. If he wants more he needs to be honest it might not be what you want to hear and he might not like the answer...

Like you say his loss if he messes it up.

So kgirl when next week did you want to me lol

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By *ax-BangingMan
over a year ago

town

Funny how he didnt raise alarm that he wasn't comfortable with you seeing other people..

Lady xx "

To be honest it looks like its must be all on his terms, he wants to have his cake and eat it, but not share with anyone else !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So after prolonged talking and a date meet followed by some x rated action I agreed to be 'fb's' with someone on here. A conversation ensued about fab and emotions last night. He advised that he doesn't want a relationship or to hurt me at any point.

However a recent status about daytime meets has got him in a tizz and 'sorry but I cant see you again'.

In my opinion if something isn't heading to a monogamous relationship I'm free to behave however I like....

Agree? disagree? Similar experiences? "

I think what's important is take you take the positives and negatives from situation. You obviously both liked each other and clicked. Men are wired up very differently to women. You deal with complex issues and crisis in life much better as you have to deal with so much as person physically and emotionally. This guy played his cards and meant well I'm sure, but when control is lost we all feel vulnerable. It's good it happened now before things got more complicated. Your a very attractive woman so to a man its a massive dent to his ego that you have to be shared, but hey this is fab!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Funny how he didnt raise alarm that he wasn't comfortable with you seeing other people..

Lady xx

To be honest it looks like its must be all on his terms, he wants to have his cake and eat it, but not share with anyone else !

That's what I think

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Unless you've agreed to be exclusive with each other, then he's in no position as to how you conduct your personal life

Being FB's doesn't mean you can't swing separately too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's a good definition of swinging Max .... having your cake and eating it!

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By *aydee65Man
over a year ago

Near Merthyr

I'm not sure why you thought it was aimed at you, but was purely my take on a situation that seems to occur more and more. In fact, if you read it more carefully you will see that it is more likely to have been aimed at the guy who you were with, although in truth it wasn't really 'aimed' at anyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Been here once as a couples profile as fb.went the same. All social meets no real meets, jealously and then the I have feelings for you, why are you doing this to me??? So I kindly said, you need to start being honest with yourself on what you want, this is not the place to find that. She's happily married now and we're still friends. This is not a place to build a relationship if you have any jealousy issues.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Umm no sunshine if you don't want me as a girlfriend I sure as hell wont be acting like one.

This x 1000,0000.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Women are the stereotypical jealous or 'emotional' ones, but I think men are just as bad, if not worse. I didn't realise how bad until I saw for myself on here how insecure and possessive they get when faced with another rival peacock fanning his feathers.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Women are the stereotypical jealous or 'emotional' ones, but I think men are just as bad, if not worse. I didn't realise how bad until I saw for myself on here how insecure and possessive they get when faced with another rival peacock fanning his feathers."

Yup. This

I'm quite cut throat about meets anyway but I will not have anyone tell me how to behave. Especially when they're claiming its just fun until one of us meets someone.

I think he just didn't get how big sex is for me. Plenty more fish in the sea.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We're built to be territorial about women, I think. Biological wossname innit. Imperative.

I suppose those of us who are cool with it are theoretically, more evolved than our possessive counterparts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yup. This

I'm quite cut throat about meets anyway but I will not have anyone tell me how to behave. Especially when they're claiming its just fun until one of us meets someone.

I think he just didn't get how big sex is for me. Plenty more fish in the sea.

hugs Hun xxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Unless you've agreed to be exclusive with each other, then he's in no position as to how you conduct your personal life

Being FB's doesn't mean you can't swing separately too

Very true, I've been with my fb for 3 years & at no point have we ever been exclusive, I still swing alone & he does his bit here n there. We are still very close & enjoy the couple fun where time allows, we like the flexibility that swinging gives us & yeah, we like to have our cake & eat it. Being a couple & being singles can work, but we do balance it with our 1:1 time to keep the connection going X

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By *all Mid WalesMan
over a year ago

Mid Wales

feelings and emotions are very tricky things. I am sure he meant what he said about being just FB's, but when he saw your post the green mist showed his face and he probably discovered that he had more feelings than he realise for you.

doesnt give the right to dictate to you either way, but i can see and understand this, i was in your position few months back when a fb of mine got upset when someone posted that we were having a coffee.

dont get to angry about him and the situation, just tell remind him what you want and move on, he will be hurt and upset but its for the best and as previously stated better now that weeks down the line as his feelings would of grown even more for you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agreed!

So was it fine for him (from his point of view) to have seperate meets then? X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Only ever had one guy get like this. Hounding for exclusivety when I didn't want anything of the sort. He obviously wasn't impressed as he then decided to lock me in his home and refuse to let me out for half an hour despite my pleading. So the minute anyone were to get remotely clingy now, I'd be kicking them into touch where they belong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agreed with op here fwb/fb you can both do as you please as you are not in a relationship and you are not being monogamous so his loss op

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can we call them swingles please?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Agreed!

So was it fine for him (from his point of view) to have seperate meets then? X"

He didn't want either of us having sex with anyone else but he's actually dating multiple girls from what I understand. Meh.

If anything its given me the old feisty K back.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Can we call them swingles please? "

I think swingles should take off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

However a recent status about daytime meets has got him in a tizz and 'sorry but I cant see you again'.

In my opinion if something isn't heading to a monogamous relationship I'm free to behave however I like....

Agree? disagree? Similar experiences? "

Agree

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Agreed!

So was it fine for him (from his point of view) to have seperate meets then? X

He didn't want either of us having sex with anyone else but he's actually dating multiple girls from what I understand. Meh.

If anything its given me the old feisty K back.

Like it's been said, having his cake and eating it by the looks of things!

Good on you though! Loves a feisty lady

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can we call them swingles please?

I think swingles should take off

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By *heep2405Man
over a year ago

Newport

"If you've agreed with meeting other people and not exclusive to one another unless playing in a couples situation then there shouldn't of been a problem.

My personal opinion but I think sometimes men and women on here want all the bonuses of a relationship but not call it a relationship

Exactly. I like to call a spade a spade. We had the relationship/emotions/feelings talk last night, cleared that up as he's happy being single.

Then the minute I make a statement as a single female who actually likes swinging I got lambasted as 'its dangerous for you and me'.

Umm no sunshine if you don't want me as a girlfriend I sure as hell wont be acting like one.

That's exactly what I want, I'm way to busy to be in a relationship. Just got to find me a FB.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Me thinks girls here on their own is a risky business and finding a fb can only be good for your safety. .but please don't think that a relationship can be good if grown from fab seeds...Find a relationship on another site...move on K girl and I'm sure you'll find what you want....the green eyed monster obviously reared its ugly head. Me and her indoors love each other without conditions and have a blissful relationship...good luck and stay safe xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Me thinks girls here on their own is a risky business and finding a fb can only be good for your safety. .but please don't think that a relationship can be good if grown from fab seeds...Find a relationship on another site...move on K girl and I'm sure you'll find what you want....the green eyed monster obviously reared its ugly head. Me and her indoors love each other without conditions and have a blissful relationship...good luck and stay safe xx

"
I know multiple happy relationships that have grown on fab. I'm not going to discount that ever happening to me.. However a relationship as such isn't on my agenda at all right now.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm a Swingle

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep we are one of them

. We met on fab and are slowly approaching the 2 year land mark lol x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can we call them swingles please? "

I'm happy to be in the swingles 'camp' - have been stung by same situation as K Girl. One rule for them and other for us.

Up the Swingles

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Yep we are one of them

. We met on fab and are slowly approaching the 2 year land mark lol x"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

However a recent status about daytime meets has got him in a tizz and 'sorry but I cant see you again'.

In my opinion if something isn't heading to a monogamous relationship I'm free to behave however I like....

Agree? disagree? Similar experiences? "

Gutted I can't message you privately k girl x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

^ Lol..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know multiple happy relationships that have grown on fab. I'm not going to discount that ever happening to me.. However a relationship as such isn't on my agenda at all right now.

Just my personal view here but as you say that you don't discount the fact that it may happen to you !!

What if you were in a position perhaps similar to this chap who may well have initially thought it was ok but then perhaps found that his feeling were stronger than he expected and in his own way put an end to it

There are always three sides to every story in this case yours his and the truth

Maybe we are all hounding some poor guy for actually having feelings for someone

Or he might just have wanted his cake and eat it !!!

Just a thought

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I know multiple happy relationships that have grown on fab. I'm not going to discount that ever happening to me.. However a relationship as such isn't on my agenda at all right now.

Just my personal view here but as you say that you don't discount the fact that it may happen to you !!

There are always three sides to every story in this case yours his and the truth

Maybe we are all hounding some poor guy for actually having feelings for someone

Or he might just have wanted his cake and eat it !!!

Just a thought "

Read the OP. We'd discussed the night before that he doesn't want a relationship. That he's happy being single. That he's happily dating when he has the time.

I however prefer to meet than date hence me being told that he couldn't see me again. He's fine with either of us dating other people just not fucking anyone else.

As to me being in a similar situation with someone else its no secret that I fell for a previous fb earlier this year. The boy had mad skills but was already attached so I walked away before I could fall any further. It was insane and life changing. He definitely was a game changer. Oh how I miss his fists

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By *atcherofmyballsMan
over a year ago

hereford

There's a lot of cake on this thread. If there's any going spare can I have a piece with my cuppa. Ta muchly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There's a lot of cake on this thread. If there's any going spare can I have a piece with my cuppa. Ta muchly

I'm with you on this one, I just love cake mmmmm

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

why cant a relationship from here be good ? we met on here and have been together for 8 years

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Only ever had one guy get like this. Hounding for exclusivety when I didn't want anything of the sort. He obviously wasn't impressed as he then decided to lock me in his home and refuse to let me out for half an hour despite my pleading. So the minute anyone were to get remotely clingy now, I'd be kicking them into touch where they belong

Wow what? he locked you in his home???

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"There's a lot of cake on this thread. If there's any going spare can I have a piece with my cuppa. Ta muchly

I'm with you on this one, I just love cake mmmmm"

I want cake too. Pretty please.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

why cant a relationship from here be good ? we met on here and have been together for 8 years

I think it can work, you're not the only couple who've met here & still ok, I know a few. I'm in a relationship from here, we may not live together, he may not be swinging right now, but it is a relationship & it's worked for 3 years x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wow what? he locked you in his home??? "

Yes, he had already locked the door when I got there which I didn't take much notice of. Wouldn't unlock it for me to go.

Never mind it's behind me now.

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By *nighthood75Man
over a year ago

Rhondda

I always make sure that any potential swing partner knows im in this to swing, not get into a relationship. A few women find this harsh and dont mail me again but i have met a few with same mindset and some really good times and made some friends. If this was a site to find lifetime partners it wouldnt be called fabswingers would it!!

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