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"It is and im glad im not the only one whos noticed a change think its vanilla time for us all haha like bears in hibernation :P " Don't think anyone can do this 24/7 365 | |||
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"Mad isn't it! Summers here and we are all feeling flat. .. Maybe the camps will excite us again Heard lots of good about the other one though xx" Should have seen who I turned down because I can't be arsed! Check your snapchat Now if I could get him to come to the camp | |||
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"Its gone rubbish and the forums gone crap as well nuff said " . Sorry!!! I've been busy | |||
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"I'm getting bored of Fab and seriously thinking about deleting.... Anyone else ever get like this? " Fab has lost its sparkle for me to at the moment. To much bitching and backstabbing going on for me and I can't be arsed to be a part of it. I'm here to organise the singles social and that's about it. I very rarely come on here now and the forums well I tend to find you can't comment on anything and if you do you get a selective few jumping all over you like you must agree with them. Makes me wonder what the oitside world think when they read a open forum mind lol | |||
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"Its gone rubbish and the forums gone crap as well nuff said " I rarely post on the forums anymore as so many nasty comments were being made about highjacking threads and accusing people of allsorts I just can't be fucking bothered anymore. The fun has gone out of it, a lot of people seem very bitter on here and want to put others down all the time. Not got time for negativity in my life atm xx | |||
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"I'm getting bored of Fab and seriously thinking about deleting.... Anyone else ever get like this? Fab has lost its sparkle for me to at the moment. To much bitching and backstabbing going on for me and I can't be arsed to be a part of it. I'm here to organise the singles social and that's about it. I very rarely come on here now and the forums well I tend to find you can't comment on anything and if you do you get a selective few jumping all over you like you must agree with them. Makes me wonder what the oitside world think when they read a open forum mind lol " | |||
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"Its gone rubbish and the forums gone crap as well nuff said I rarely post on the forums anymore as so many nasty comments were being made about highjacking threads and accusing people of allsorts I just can't be fucking bothered anymore. The fun has gone out of it, a lot of people seem very bitter on here and want to put others down all the time. Not got time for negativity in my life atm xx" Nail on head the Welsh forum police don't like others having fun that's why I don't bother commenting much no more | |||
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"Its gone rubbish and the forums gone crap as well nuff said I rarely post on the forums anymore as so many nasty comments were being made about highjacking threads and accusing people of allsorts I just can't be fucking bothered anymore. The fun has gone out of it, a lot of people seem very bitter on here and want to put others down all the time. Not got time for negativity in my life atm xx Nail on head the Welsh forum police don't like others having fun that's why I don't bother commenting much no more " Always some diva with a bitchy sniping comment aimed at putting some of us down, fuck em I say. Yeah, I avoid the forum a bit now, only because I want to tell them how I feel about what they do & then I get told off, but I'm still doing my thing on the site. I don't really care who met who or who belongs to who, if they want to meet me & I want to meet them I will, it's a swinging site & that's the goal, respectful naughty fun with like minded people x | |||
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"Its gone rubbish and the forums gone crap as well nuff said I rarely post on the forums anymore as so many nasty comments were being made about highjacking threads and accusing people of allsorts I just can't be fucking bothered anymore. The fun has gone out of it, a lot of people seem very bitter on here and want to put others down all the time. Not got time for negativity in my life atm xx Nail on head the Welsh forum police don't like others having fun that's why I don't bother commenting much no more Always some diva with a bitchy sniping comment aimed at putting some of us down, fuck em I say. Yeah, I avoid the forum a bit now, only because I want to tell them how I feel about what they do & then I get told off, but I'm still doing my thing on the site. I don't really care who met who or who belongs to who, if they want to meet me & I want to meet them I will, it's a swinging site & that's the goal, respectful naughty fun with like minded people x" | |||
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"I'm getting bored of Fab and seriously thinking about deleting.... Anyone else ever get like this? Fab has lost its sparkle for me to at the moment. To much bitching and backstabbing going on for me and I can't be arsed to be a part of it. I'm here to organise the singles social and that's about it. I very rarely come on here now and the forums well I tend to find you can't comment on anything and if you do you get a selective few jumping all over you like you must agree with them. Makes me wonder what the oitside world think when they read a open forum mind lol " You read my mind giggs | |||
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"We have been on fab since day one and it has changed a lot, it seems to be a lot more about who is friends with who and who can I avoid rather than swinging. We used to always comment in the forums and in the 'old' welsh chat but rarely do anymore. Still, we have met some fantastic people and have attended brill socials and we wouldn't have done this without fab " | |||
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"This thread really makes me sad. I have been on fab for a few years now and even met my ex partner on here who was amazing. Just think some people need to let their barriers down a bit. The whole culture of swinging is a care free mind and too many people are so bloody uptight on here lately. Genuine people still exist on here and if it's only just meeting up for a social and having a chuckle about speaking openly around sex , that has to be a good thing. Also losing people like nawtyred, Jesus hot women like you is what keeps me alive and also gives me a sense of feeling to keep in good shape and look good. Vanilla meets can be brilliant but how long do they take to get that person to open up sexually and met your needs. ANSWER fucking ages!! So cut out the middle man and lets all get back to having fun. Seriously could you talk to someone you just picked up in a club about your love for watersports lmao " | |||
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"Last few months since I been back it feels to me like this site has lost its swinging feel .. All most men want is single one off meets .... Not happy to put any effort I to attending socials or events .. This site for me is just as much about the socialising as the sex .. Yes I've had some fun times with regular friends but it just seems a little like a dating site at the mo rather than the lifestyle I associate with "swinging" All opinions my own n not out to offend!! " interesting point on socials. I use to attend lots but just find the same people go and it tend to feel like a bit of a click then. You have no idea for single men how intimidating this can be. The only way to get across at these socials is basically just be a bit loud and try and stand out. Not everyone wants to put on a show and would rather come across genuine through this site. | |||
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"Last few months since I been back it feels to me like this site has lost its swinging feel .. All most men want is single one off meets .... Not happy to put any effort I to attending socials or events .. This site for me is just as much about the socialising as the sex .. Yes I've had some fun times with regular friends but it just seems a little like a dating site at the mo rather than the lifestyle I associate with "swinging" All opinions my own n not out to offend!! interesting point on socials. I use to attend lots but just find the same people go and it tend to feel like a bit of a click then. You have no idea for single men how intimidating this can be. The only way to get across at these socials is basically just be a bit loud and try and stand out. Not everyone wants to put on a show and would rather come across genuine through this site. " I see your point with the standing out from the crowd it can be difficult. But I always enjoy seeing new people at the socials although sometimes I can be too shy to talk to new men | |||
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"We've been on here about 7 years almost, and I have to say things are different. There have been periods like this before, things have a natural rhythm or cycle, although its not been this bad for this length of time before. BUT.... and this is where I stamp in with my size nines and get unpopular (or, even more unpopular than before lol) it seems to me that lots of people are having a moan, a bit of a "poor me" moment, and have lost sight of the fact... which is...YOU can change things! years ago, no-one really did much proactively, they would moan about there only being a few socials, or how crap they were, but they did nothing about it. So, the advice given was "If you don't like it, organise your own"... and people did, lots of people, and with variety too, socials, camping, roadtrips, lunches, beach days etc. People moan about the attitude of newbies... so change it, tell them their attitude stinks and they wont get meets. People moan that socials are "clicky"... so, do what we do, wander round and insert yourselves into groups, make them talk to you. People moan about the "panda" attitude from other swingers, well, don't do it then, don't rush in and have sex just cos they are cute and fuckable, take time, get to know them, get them along to socials, make friends... hell, some folks we met when we first joined, took us 4 years before we did the nasty with them lol! Bottom line, if it all seems to be happening to YOU, then, there you have found the common denominator...YOU, and you are both the problem and the solution. Take control, don't drift along feeling "meh", its not going to magically change overnight unless you grab hold of it, and give it a shake.. just don't point it at me when you are shaking it! " Well said mart, and its been longer than 7 years haven't it? I can remember our first social in Cardiff, when I was quieter and shyer than I am now | |||
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"We've been on here about 7 years almost, and I have to say things are different. There have been periods like this before, things have a natural rhythm or cycle, although its not been this bad for this length of time before. BUT.... and this is where I stamp in with my size nines and get unpopular (or, even more unpopular than before lol) it seems to me that lots of people are having a moan, a bit of a "poor me" moment, and have lost sight of the fact... which is...YOU can change things! years ago, no-one really did much proactively, they would moan about there only being a few socials, or how crap they were, but they did nothing about it. So, the advice given was "If you don't like it, organise your own"... and people did, lots of people, and with variety too, socials, camping, roadtrips, lunches, beach days etc. People moan about the attitude of newbies... so change it, tell them their attitude stinks and they wont get meets. People moan that socials are "clicky"... so, do what we do, wander round and insert yourselves into groups, make them talk to you. People moan about the "panda" attitude from other swingers, well, don't do it then, don't rush in and have sex just cos they are cute and fuckable, take time, get to know them, get them along to socials, make friends... hell, some folks we met when we first joined, took us 4 years before we did the nasty with them lol! Bottom line, if it all seems to be happening to YOU, then, there you have found the common denominator...YOU, and you are both the problem and the solution. Take control, don't drift along feeling "meh", its not going to magically change overnight unless you grab hold of it, and give it a shake.. just don't point it at me when you are shaking it! Well said mart, and its been longer than 7 years haven't it? I can remember our first social in Cardiff, when I was quieter and shyer than I am now " Blimey, I think you might be right! Now, as for the "quiet and shy"... hmmm... I've checked the "Charlie and Lola Handbook" and those words don't come up... at all, ever lol! | |||
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"We've been on here about 7 years almost, and I have to say things are different. There have been periods like this before, things have a natural rhythm or cycle, although its not been this bad for this length of time before. BUT.... and this is where I stamp in with my size nines and get unpopular (or, even more unpopular than before lol) it seems to me that lots of people are having a moan, a bit of a "poor me" moment, and have lost sight of the fact... which is...YOU can change things! years ago, no-one really did much proactively, they would moan about there only being a few socials, or how crap they were, but they did nothing about it. So, the advice given was "If you don't like it, organise your own"... and people did, lots of people, and with variety too, socials, camping, roadtrips, lunches, beach days etc. People moan about the attitude of newbies... so change it, tell them their attitude stinks and they wont get meets. People moan that socials are "clicky"... so, do what we do, wander round and insert yourselves into groups, make them talk to you. People moan about the "panda" attitude from other swingers, well, don't do it then, don't rush in and have sex just cos they are cute and fuckable, take time, get to know them, get them along to socials, make friends... hell, some folks we met when we first joined, took us 4 years before we did the nasty with them lol! Bottom line, if it all seems to be happening to YOU, then, there you have found the common denominator...YOU, and you are both the problem and the solution. Take control, don't drift along feeling "meh", its not going to magically change overnight unless you grab hold of it, and give it a shake.. just don't point it at me when you are shaking it! Well said mart, and its been longer than 7 years haven't it? I can remember our first social in Cardiff, when I was quieter and shyer than I am now Blimey, I think you might be right! Now, as for the "quiet and shy"... hmmm... I've checked the "Charlie and Lola Handbook" and those words don't come up... at all, ever lol! " Haha, less quiet and shy than we used to be | |||
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"Last few months since I been back it feels to me like this site has lost its swinging feel .. All most men want is single one off meets .... Not happy to put any effort I to attending socials or events .. This site for me is just as much about the socialising as the sex .. Yes I've had some fun times with regular friends but it just seems a little like a dating site at the mo rather than the lifestyle I associate with "swinging" All opinions my own n not out to offend!! interesting point on socials. I use to attend lots but just find the same people go and it tend to feel like a bit of a click then. You have no idea for single men how intimidating this can be. The only way to get across at these socials is basically just be a bit loud and try and stand out. Not everyone wants to put on a show and would rather come across genuine through this site. " | |||
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"We have been on fab since day one and it has changed a lot, it seems to be a lot more about who is friends with who and who can I avoid rather than swinging. We used to always comment in the forums and in the 'old' welsh chat but rarely do anymore. Still, we have met some fantastic people and have attended brill socials and we wouldn't have done this without fab " | |||
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"I feel the same as you all I'm feeling like fab has lost a bit of its naughtiness idno what's happening x" ...a BIT of its naughtiness...? It seems to have become bland, boring and full of people who just TALK a good game lately...! Sad to say, I'm watching closely for signs of improvement, and hoping it happens fairly quickly before I finally lose faith and am out of here... I've had a couple of nice meets from here in the past, so I know it CAN work, it just saddens me that its become like Facebook. What we need on here are people who actually DO want to meet. | |||
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"I feel the same as you all I'm feeling like fab has lost a bit of its naughtiness idno what's happening x ...a BIT of its naughtiness...? It seems to have become bland, boring and full of people who just TALK a good game lately...! Sad to say, I'm watching closely for signs of improvement, and hoping it happens fairly quickly before I finally lose faith and am out of here... I've had a couple of nice meets from here in the past, so I know it CAN work, it just saddens me that its become like Facebook. What we need on here are people who actually DO want to meet." Lots of people who do meet on here, unfortunately the minority have spoilt it for the majority. .. Its up to us all as genuine members to turn this place back around to how we all know it can be, dont give the spoilers head space to wind us all up and completely blank any negatively... The socials really are fab places, there is something for everyone and if there is something anyone would like either set it up or suggest it on a new thread for someone else to arrange. Just an idea | |||
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"Last few months since I been back it feels to me like this site has lost its swinging feel .. All most men want is single one off meets .... Not happy to put any effort I to attending socials or events .. This site for me is just as much about the socialising as the sex .. Yes I've had some fun times with regular friends but it just seems a little like a dating site at the mo rather than the lifestyle I associate with "swinging" All opinions my own n not out to offend!! interesting point on socials. I use to attend lots but just find the same people go and it tend to feel like a bit of a click then. You have no idea for single men how intimidating this can be. The only way to get across at these socials is basically just be a bit loud and try and stand out. Not everyone wants to put on a show and would rather come across genuine through this site. " This....Wrexham is full of ignorant people im afraid | |||
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"I don't actually know anyone on here well enough, so this is a generalization an not aimed at anyone, but most of this thread is pretty down beat an just as I'm looking forward to my first social next weekend. Guess I just got a knack for timing things well " Come on butt chin up took ages for my first meet and I mean ages lol but as opposed to all the people who will tell you to quit ......... Fuck em give it another try butt come on feel strong be strong | |||
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"I don't actually know anyone on here well enough, so this is a generalization an not aimed at anyone, but most of this thread is pretty down beat an just as I'm looking forward to my first social next weekend. Guess I just got a knack for timing things well Come on butt chin up took ages for my first meet and I mean ages lol but as opposed to all the people who will tell you to quit ......... Fuck em give it another try butt come on feel strong be strong " cheers butt lol. I'm pretty up beat about it to be honest I'll be counting the hours all week just seems a shame so many people seem disillusioned with fab at the mo | |||
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"Its gone rubbish and the forums gone crap as well nuff said I rarely post on the forums anymore as so many nasty comments were being made about highjacking threads and accusing people of allsorts I just can't be fucking bothered anymore. The fun has gone out of it, a lot of people seem very bitter on here and want to put others down all the time. Not got time for negativity in my life atm xx" I agree and I too have stopped getting involved on the forums as it's the same people saying the same things or just saying anything for attention I have started to visit the club and parties when invited as the people are nicer and no hassle I won't come off just be more selective ?? | |||
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"What a sensible discussion with lots of very good points raised by everyone really, although it is sad to hear how deflated a lot of you feel. I think the internet is just not a great place to meet people really. You can't tell what people are really about from words and photos. There's no body language, no voice, no first impressions, none of the normal things that we see when we say hello to someone in the flesh. I've tried vanilla sites and they were even worse as some men either lied about anything and everything to get you into bed or got really angry if you didn't respond to a message. Plus when I disclosed by desires about voyeurism, exhibitionism, group sex and playing with girls, none of them got it and one guy's opinion of me plummeted from classy chick to cheap tart. Sadly there are players on here who are competitive and bitchy and just want to be better than others. It's a sad sign of our times. But I think the vast majority of people who have put some effort into their profile and are verified by decent people are good people, I've met some really amazing and interesting people at parties - fascinating and funny people who respect me and accept me for who I am, and don't make me feel cheap just because I love doing dirty things as a bit of escapism from my normal life. Swinging must be non-competitive, non-judgemental and honest. Keep sticking to your who you are and what you want and I think we'll all meet like minded people and have fun times. PS - I'm only just out of a swinging relationship and still feeling pretty gutted - but I'm well up for lots of fun at socials this summer and meeting some new people. So if I can smile right now - so can you . Xx" I'm smiling, Fabs working for me & this thread is good because none of the divas have dipped in yet | |||
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"What a sensible discussion with lots of very good points raised by everyone really, although it is sad to hear how deflated a lot of you feel. I think the internet is just not a great place to meet people really. You can't tell what people are really about from words and photos. There's no body language, no voice, no first impressions, none of the normal things that we see when we say hello to someone in the flesh. I've tried vanilla sites and they were even worse as some men either lied about anything and everything to get you into bed or got really angry if you didn't respond to a message. Plus when I disclosed by desires about voyeurism, exhibitionism, group sex and playing with girls, none of them got it and one guy's opinion of me plummeted from classy chick to cheap tart. Sadly there are players on here who are competitive and bitchy and just want to be better than others. It's a sad sign of our times. But I think the vast majority of people who have put some effort into their profile and are verified by decent people are good people, I've met some really amazing and interesting people at parties - fascinating and funny people who respect me and accept me for who I am, and don't make me feel cheap just because I love doing dirty things as a bit of escapism from my normal life. Swinging must be non-competitive, non-judgemental and honest. Keep sticking to your who you are and what you want and I think we'll all meet like minded people and have fun times. PS - I'm only just out of a swinging relationship and still feeling pretty gutted - but I'm well up for lots of fun at socials this summer and meeting some new people. So if I can smile right now - so can you . Xx" | |||
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"What a sensible discussion with lots of very good points raised by everyone really, although it is sad to hear how deflated a lot of you feel. I think the internet is just not a great place to meet people really. You can't tell what people are really about from words and photos. There's no body language, no voice, no first impressions, none of the normal things that we see when we say hello to someone in the flesh. I've tried vanilla sites and they were even worse as some men either lied about anything and everything to get you into bed or got really angry if you didn't respond to a message. Plus when I disclosed by desires about voyeurism, exhibitionism, group sex and playing with girls, none of them got it and one guy's opinion of me plummeted from classy chick to cheap tart. Sadly there are players on here who are competitive and bitchy and just want to be better than others. It's a sad sign of our times. But I think the vast majority of people who have put some effort into their profile and are verified by decent people are good people, I've met some really amazing and interesting people at parties - fascinating and funny people who respect me and accept me for who I am, and don't make me feel cheap just because I love doing dirty things as a bit of escapism from my normal life. Swinging must be non-competitive, non-judgemental and honest. Keep sticking to your who you are and what you want and I think we'll all meet like minded people and have fun times. PS - I'm only just out of a swinging relationship and still feeling pretty gutted - but I'm well up for lots of fun at socials this summer and meeting some new people. So if I can smile right now - so can you . Xx" Well said Monica. Concentrate solely on what you want from swinging and ignore the peripheral debris. Any community, online or in the real world, will have cliques and hierarchies but if you can dodge between them and don't compromise your standards and pleasing results can be found. | |||
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"What a sensible discussion with lots of very good points raised by everyone really, although it is sad to hear how deflated a lot of you feel. I think the internet is just not a great place to meet people really. You can't tell what people are really about from words and photos. There's no body language, no voice, no first impressions, none of the normal things that we see when we say hello to someone in the flesh. I've tried vanilla sites and they were even worse as some men either lied about anything and everything to get you into bed or got really angry if you didn't respond to a message. Plus when I disclosed by desires about voyeurism, exhibitionism, group sex and playing with girls, none of them got it and one guy's opinion of me plummeted from classy chick to cheap tart. Sadly there are players on here who are competitive and bitchy and just want to be better than others. It's a sad sign of our times. But I think the vast majority of people who have put some effort into their profile and are verified by decent people are good people, I've met some really amazing and interesting people at parties - fascinating and funny people who respect me and accept me for who I am, and don't make me feel cheap just because I love doing dirty things as a bit of escapism from my normal life. Swinging must be non-competitive, non-judgemental and honest. Keep sticking to your who you are and what you want and I think we'll all meet like minded people and have fun times. PS - I'm only just out of a swinging relationship and still feeling pretty gutted - but I'm well up for lots of fun at socials this summer and meeting some new people. So if I can smile right now - so can you . Xx Well said Monica. Concentrate solely on what you want from swinging and ignore the peripheral debris. Any community, online or in the real world, will have cliques and hierarchies but if you can dodge between them and don't compromise your standards and pleasing results can be found. " | |||
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"What a sensible discussion with lots of very good points raised by everyone really, although it is sad to hear how deflated a lot of you feel. I think the internet is just not a great place to meet people really. You can't tell what people are really about from words and photos. There's no body language, no voice, no first impressions, none of the normal things that we see when we say hello to someone in the flesh. I've tried vanilla sites and they were even worse as some men either lied about anything and everything to get you into bed or got really angry if you didn't respond to a message. Plus when I disclosed by desires about voyeurism, exhibitionism, group sex and playing with girls, none of them got it and one guy's opinion of me plummeted from classy chick to cheap tart. Sadly there are players on here who are competitive and bitchy and just want to be better than others. It's a sad sign of our times. But I think the vast majority of people who have put some effort into their profile and are verified by decent people are good people, I've met some really amazing and interesting people at parties - fascinating and funny people who respect me and accept me for who I am, and don't make me feel cheap just because I love doing dirty things as a bit of escapism from my normal life. Swinging must be non-competitive, non-judgemental and honest. Keep sticking to your who you are and what you want and I think we'll all meet like minded people and have fun times. PS - I'm only just out of a swinging relationship and still feeling pretty gutted - but I'm well up for lots of fun at socials this summer and meeting some new people. So if I can smile right now - so can you . Xx Well said Monica. Concentrate solely on what you want from swinging and ignore the peripheral debris. Any community, online or in the real world, will have cliques and hierarchies but if you can dodge between them and don't compromise your standards and pleasing results can be found. " | |||
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"What a sensible discussion with lots of very good points raised by everyone really, although it is sad to hear how deflated a lot of you feel. I think the internet is just not a great place to meet people really. You can't tell what people are really about from words and photos. There's no body language, no voice, no first impressions, none of the normal things that we see when we say hello to someone in the flesh. I've tried vanilla sites and they were even worse as some men either lied about anything and everything to get you into bed or got really angry if you didn't respond to a message. Plus when I disclosed by desires about voyeurism, exhibitionism, group sex and playing with girls, none of them got it and one guy's opinion of me plummeted from classy chick to cheap tart. Sadly there are players on here who are competitive and bitchy and just want to be better than others. It's a sad sign of our times. But I think the vast majority of people who have put some effort into their profile and are verified by decent people are good people, I've met some really amazing and interesting people at parties - fascinating and funny people who respect me and accept me for who I am, and don't make me feel cheap just because I love doing dirty things as a bit of escapism from my normal life. Swinging must be non-competitive, non-judgemental and honest. Keep sticking to your who you are and what you want and I think we'll all meet like minded people and have fun times. PS - I'm only just out of a swinging relationship and still feeling pretty gutted - but I'm well up for lots of fun at socials this summer and meeting some new people. So if I can smile right now - so can you . Xx Well said Monica. Concentrate solely on what you want from swinging and ignore the peripheral debris. Any community, online or in the real world, will have cliques and hierarchies but if you can dodge between them and don't compromise your standards and pleasing results can be found. " I agree but it's hard when your on the receiving end of it all And like some one said they don't say boo when then actually see you face to face lol | |||
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"What a sensible discussion with lots of very good points raised by everyone really, although it is sad to hear how deflated a lot of you feel. I think the internet is just not a great place to meet people really. You can't tell what people are really about from words and photos. There's no body language, no voice, no first impressions, none of the normal things that we see when we say hello to someone in the flesh. I've tried vanilla sites and they were even worse as some men either lied about anything and everything to get you into bed or got really angry if you didn't respond to a message. Plus when I disclosed by desires about voyeurism, exhibitionism, group sex and playing with girls, none of them got it and one guy's opinion of me plummeted from classy chick to cheap tart. Sadly there are players on here who are competitive and bitchy and just want to be better than others. It's a sad sign of our times. But I think the vast majority of people who have put some effort into their profile and are verified by decent people are good people, I've met some really amazing and interesting people at parties - fascinating and funny people who respect me and accept me for who I am, and don't make me feel cheap just because I love doing dirty things as a bit of escapism from my normal life. Swinging must be non-competitive, non-judgemental and honest. Keep sticking to your who you are and what you want and I think we'll all meet like minded people and have fun times. PS - I'm only just out of a swinging relationship and still feeling pretty gutted - but I'm well up for lots of fun at socials this summer and meeting some new people. So if I can smile right now - so can you . Xx Well said Monica. Concentrate solely on what you want from swinging and ignore the peripheral debris. Any community, online or in the real world, will have cliques and hierarchies but if you can dodge between them and don't compromise your standards and pleasing results can be found. I agree but it's hard when your on the receiving end of it all And like some one said they don't say boo when then actually see you face to face lol " That's the bit that makes me giggle inside Giggles | |||
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"What a sensible discussion with lots of very good points raised by everyone really, although it is sad to hear how deflated a lot of you feel. I think the internet is just not a great place to meet people really. You can't tell what people are really about from words and photos. There's no body language, no voice, no first impressions, none of the normal things that we see when we say hello to someone in the flesh. I've tried vanilla sites and they were even worse as some men either lied about anything and everything to get you into bed or got really angry if you didn't respond to a message. Plus when I disclosed by desires about voyeurism, exhibitionism, group sex and playing with girls, none of them got it and one guy's opinion of me plummeted from classy chick to cheap tart. Sadly there are players on here who are competitive and bitchy and just want to be better than others. It's a sad sign of our times. But I think the vast majority of people who have put some effort into their profile and are verified by decent people are good people, I've met some really amazing and interesting people at parties - fascinating and funny people who respect me and accept me for who I am, and don't make me feel cheap just because I love doing dirty things as a bit of escapism from my normal life. Swinging must be non-competitive, non-judgemental and honest. Keep sticking to your who you are and what you want and I think we'll all meet like minded people and have fun times. PS - I'm only just out of a swinging relationship and still feeling pretty gutted - but I'm well up for lots of fun at socials this summer and meeting some new people. So if I can smile right now - so can you . Xx Well said Monica. Concentrate solely on what you want from swinging and ignore the peripheral debris. Any community, online or in the real world, will have cliques and hierarchies but if you can dodge between them and don't compromise your standards and pleasing results can be found. I agree but it's hard when your on the receiving end of it all And like some one said they don't say boo when then actually see you face to face lol " Will say boo next time I see you lol | |||
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"What a sensible discussion with lots of very good points raised by everyone really, although it is sad to hear how deflated a lot of you feel. I think the internet is just not a great place to meet people really. You can't tell what people are really about from words and photos. There's no body language, no voice, no first impressions, none of the normal things that we see when we say hello to someone in the flesh. I've tried vanilla sites and they were even worse as some men either lied about anything and everything to get you into bed or got really angry if you didn't respond to a message. Plus when I disclosed by desires about voyeurism, exhibitionism, group sex and playing with girls, none of them got it and one guy's opinion of me plummeted from classy chick to cheap tart. Sadly there are players on here who are competitive and bitchy and just want to be better than others. It's a sad sign of our times. But I think the vast majority of people who have put some effort into their profile and are verified by decent people are good people, I've met some really amazing and interesting people at parties - fascinating and funny people who respect me and accept me for who I am, and don't make me feel cheap just because I love doing dirty things as a bit of escapism from my normal life. Swinging must be non-competitive, non-judgemental and honest. Keep sticking to your who you are and what you want and I think we'll all meet like minded people and have fun times. PS - I'm only just out of a swinging relationship and still feeling pretty gutted - but I'm well up for lots of fun at socials this summer and meeting some new people. So if I can smile right now - so can you . Xx Well said Monica. Concentrate solely on what you want from swinging and ignore the peripheral debris. Any community, online or in the real world, will have cliques and hierarchies but if you can dodge between them and don't compromise your standards and pleasing results can be found. I agree but it's hard when your on the receiving end of it all And like some one said they don't say boo when then actually see you face to face lol " maybe they just don't hold and grudge and/or don't feel the need to go over it again? The swinging community around here is a small one. It gets smaller when there's an influx of singles who only want to meet other singles in one to one settings- then the bitching etc begins! | |||
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"What a sensible discussion with lots of very good points raised by everyone really, although it is sad to hear how deflated a lot of you feel. I think the internet is just not a great place to meet people really. You can't tell what people are really about from words and photos. There's no body language, no voice, no first impressions, none of the normal things that we see when we say hello to someone in the flesh. I've tried vanilla sites and they were even worse as some men either lied about anything and everything to get you into bed or got really angry if you didn't respond to a message. Plus when I disclosed by desires about voyeurism, exhibitionism, group sex and playing with girls, none of them got it and one guy's opinion of me plummeted from classy chick to cheap tart. Sadly there are players on here who are competitive and bitchy and just want to be better than others. It's a sad sign of our times. But I think the vast majority of people who have put some effort into their profile and are verified by decent people are good people, I've met some really amazing and interesting people at parties - fascinating and funny people who respect me and accept me for who I am, and don't make me feel cheap just because I love doing dirty things as a bit of escapism from my normal life. Swinging must be non-competitive, non-judgemental and honest. Keep sticking to your who you are and what you want and I think we'll all meet like minded people and have fun times. PS - I'm only just out of a swinging relationship and still feeling pretty gutted - but I'm well up for lots of fun at socials this summer and meeting some new people. So if I can smile right now - so can you . Xx Well said Monica. Concentrate solely on what you want from swinging and ignore the peripheral debris. Any community, online or in the real world, will have cliques and hierarchies but if you can dodge between them and don't compromise your standards and pleasing results can be found. I agree but it's hard when your on the receiving end of it all And like some one said they don't say boo when then actually see you face to face lol Will say boo next time I see you lol " Hahahahahah lol nutters | |||
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"The general answer to the question is, decide then don’t let the door hit you on the way out, although this changes dependant on what gender you are. Then we get “oh no don’t leave we miss you already” blah blah blah “cough” double standards, now that I have got that out of my system. As for the forums I used to post frequently, yes many would not agree with me and that's a good thing however, I always advocated an open discussion and encouraged people to express themselves, we have enough restrictiveness with our “free and open" democracy. The reason I personally have stopped posting is the complete negativity of following posts and the complete disregard to debate and discuss, it became apparent that more and more people were intent in being confrontational. We now get posts such as this one, and yes the OP is perfectly entitled to ask questions and start a debate which strangely has happened for once (who would have known) but a simple search using the search function would have yielded posts already answered. Despite the initial question and potential comments, the only answer that really matters it the OP’s. So I say if people do not like the comments you post then they should simply either ignore them or be constructive in their criticism and not resort to the confrontational exchange that manifests itself on a regular occurrence. Although it does help to out any potential meets particularly for the females you simple have to ask yourself would I meet this confrontational/ aggressive person if they can be so openly aggressive in a public forum. More over because there is now an exodus of “genuine” swingers and I use the term loosely, the potential pool of playmates has dwindled this allows the “genuine, genuine” swingers ample opportunity to gauge who really is in the lifestyle and who is just looking to get a quick meet so dependent on your view it’s either a good or bad thing. I have been in the this lifestyle for some time and it has its life cycle; People join - people burn out (get disillusioned/ bored) – people leave To the OP, if you're not happy then leave, if you truly want to be in the lifestyle but feel disillusioned use the “hide” option, ultimately the discussion it yours. " While I agree with the above ( mostly ) I have to point out that the fact that we both along with others have re joined the forum with this topic !!! Goes to show how we can debate and discuss topics like this I also used to comment a lot but got dissalusioned by the many topics and comments that were posted just to highlight themselves ( attention seeking ) I enjoy the lifestyle and the company of certain people the same as I do in vanilla world and would say to the op that if they haven't made those bonds with people then maybe they should be asking why not ? The lifestyle and site is what you make it and just because you don't use the forums or go to socials doesn't mean that you can't enjoy them it just means that you do it your way Have fun and enjoy it for what it is !! A lifestyle for like minded and friendly people | |||
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