FabSwingers.com forum: Ghosting

By *exyswingerbbw OP Woman
over a year ago

Caerphilly

For those of you who don’t know, ghosting is when someone sleeps with someone or goes on a date etc then cuts them off, blocks their number, suddenly stops replying without an explanation.

It’s happened to me before and it’s completely crushed my self-confidence, spend days and weeks wondering what I did wrong after seeming to have a great time, being fed promises of future plans, having intense conversations getting to know someone then just like a switch… they’ve went cold on me without any kind of reasoning.

I’m Curious to know whether it’s happened to you, how you got over it, did you find out the reason or alternatively have you ever done it to someone and what was the reason you couldn’t provide a reason?

I just think I’d be able to chat to someone over a text or in person, on a call etc and just be polite and rationally explain why I was no longer interested but seems it’s quite common? Especially for men to do to women.

I can’t begin to explain how damaging and empty that can leave someone feeling. It’s one of most upsetting and painful things go go through. I wonder what your thoughts and experiences are on this issue

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By *R jag manMan
over a year ago

Warrington

Its happened to me twice now by the same woman. Was heart broken the first time. This time around i was conditioning myself mentally as i knew it would probably happen again. And it did. However she still kept my number this time and reads WhatsApps i send but never replies. Weired. Best of luck but be aware.xx

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By *exyswingerbbw OP Woman
over a year ago

Caerphilly

I have learnt by now not to let it get to me as much but still hurts especially when you think things are going well, it would prefer a no thank you then nothing x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had similar. First was someone whom I chatted with for a while, we met twice , once for a social and the other to play. I was ghosted after the second meet, even though we spent the night together after playing and discussing future meets.

Second time was someone whom we chatted for again some time, arranged to meet and they never showed, and got blocked on everything - just to add the second was a confessed married woman mind so maybe she was found out? Something I'll never find out myself tbh

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By *igman283Man
over a year ago

valleys

"For those of you who don’t know, ghosting is when someone sleeps with someone or goes on a date etc then cuts them off, blocks their number, suddenly stops replying without an explanation.

"
yeh had it done to me b4 even meeting but u just get over it and think awell salavi

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By *igman283Man
over a year ago

valleys

I was lucky enough to find out y tho after which may of helped

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes bye you never spoke to you didn't know you till we found out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No. I'm too cool to get ghosted

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By *andering Welsh GuyMan
over a year ago

All over the place

Don't get this, it's happened to me too, but if I want to end something I'm man enough to say

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Happened to me at the end of a 12 year relationship, which was fab & real life based. Couldn't get why a person I thought I knew & believed to care about me could just change overnight. I soon came to realise it said more about him than me, that he was a coward who just couldn't engage in an adult conversation. I deleted him fully from my life & while that made me feel crushed I'm now over it. But I mourn for the woman who won't put herself in that situation again. On the flip side, I have ghosted men, but that's usually because they don't accept what I've told them, I may have had sex, but it wasn't for me or whatever & they can't let go. Sometimes you're left with no choice X

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By *r WhispererMan
over a year ago

brynmawr

I’ve been ghosted a couple of times and find it Cowardly.. I’d rather she said to me I’m sorry but it’s not working for whatever reason, I can take that.. the last one , I was chatting to this girl not from fab and it was great then woke up one Friday morning to find I’d been blocked with no explanation.. like the op says it leaves you wondering what I did wrong or what’s wrong with me.

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By *exyswingerbbw OP Woman
over a year ago

Caerphilly

"Yes bye you never spoke to you didn't know you till we found out "

Is this aimed at me because we have barely ever even spoken?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Happened to me a couple of weeks ago. Was very sad about it for a few days but now I look at it as I got what I wanted and he got what he wanted.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's happened to me a few times and it did kill Mt self confidence and self esteem. I got over by simply telling myself they obviously weren't worth the effort and moving on.

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By *heLomsCouple
over a year ago

Newport

confused by this response??

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By *ory_xWoman
over a year ago

42 Wallaby Way Syndey

Ive had it happen once after meeting and arranging future meets. It can dent your self esteem but I got to the conclusion that if they arent man enough to be honest then they arent man enough to be more than a one night stand. Leave that shit in the past.

The only time I have ghosted is when I actually feared for my safety

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

confused by this response??"

Confused by mine?

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By *ory_xWoman
over a year ago

42 Wallaby Way Syndey

No lovely the one _exyswingerbbw is replying too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No lovely the one _exyswingerbbw is replying too"

Oh I see lol

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By *heLomsCouple
over a year ago

Newport

Literally happened to me twice, was due to meet someone and it was literally minutes before the meet and poof vanished into thin air, profile gone the lot.

the other time he just didn't turn up, then messaged me the next day asking for a meet again.

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By *heLomsCouple
over a year ago

Newport

"No lovely the one _exyswingerbbw is replying too

Oh I see lol"

haha sorry new to the forums and did it wrong,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No lovely the one _exyswingerbbw is replying too

Oh I see lol

haha sorry new to the forums and did it wrong,

Lol so am I to be honest

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By *inger_80Man
over a year ago

Merthyr Vale

I’ll be honest, I didn’t realise the men on here did that, I’ve had women do it to me a few times, the odd “not for me” I respect coz they had the balls to say but hate being ignored when your mid flow in a conversation or planning.

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By *allhung297Man
over a year ago

...

It's never nice to be ghosted but it's something that we grow stronger from in our Own way as we all have those friends who we can always rely on to cushion the sting.

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By *oGDomMan
over a year ago

Barry

This member has hidden their profile

Does that count as ghosting too?

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By *unnybunsWoman
over a year ago

Between here and over there

Yep it’s happened to me. Full of plans -gave it the big billy BS and then ghosted me

I look at it as it’s a reflection on their poor and weak communication skills.

Never understood it to be honest, secondly l having a regular FB and they disappear off the face of the earth with no explanation. Just bloody odd. Have some common decency at least. We are all here to have fun not our confidence dented. We move on !

I just want to have uncomplicated fun- and if it’s regular even better.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It happens for more often that I'd like. Makes me want to give up sometimes.

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By *ory_xWoman
over a year ago

42 Wallaby Way Syndey

"This member has hidden their profile

Does that count as ghosting too?"

No it doesn't

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By *exyswingerbbw OP Woman
over a year ago

Caerphilly

"This member has hidden their profile

Does that count as ghosting too?"

No it doesn't if you read my post it sums up what ghosting is

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By *ighugs69Man
over a year ago

Port Talbot

Happens online and in real life. It can be a bit of shock when it does happen.

A friend said she needed to pause our meets for a while. We kept in touch, I wished her a happy birthday and she didn't respond. A few weeks later she blocked me on FB.

I said all along I'd understand if she didn't want to meet again. It would've been nice for her to tell me instead of ghosting though lol

I could've messaged her saying well that's it then. But took the block as an impolite goodbye ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It happens. I have been ghosted leading up to meets and after.

It is certainly annoying when you get ghosted before a meet and then they make out you are the bad one for not turning up, when they literally stopped responding hours if not days beforehand.

Getting ghosted after a meet, especially if it seemed to go well, can be befuddling if not devastating too though.

But a recent meet where I was ghosted afterwards i believe was due to her mistakenly believing that I was writing her off and saying hard goodbyes; when we chatted via message after.

I think she decided to preempt possibly being rejected, which wasn't the case, by ghosting me.

So what I am saying is that whilst some people are just arses and/or cowards, some people may have low self esteem etc themselves and/or get the wrong end of the stick.

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By *yleighMan
over a year ago

bridgend

Dose this also mean when nobody replys ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I genuinely can't imagine why anyone would ghost you. You are so gorgeous and sound so honest and genuine. A woman like you is the holy grail to us lol. Shame can't message you but there you go. Never give your power or confidence to anyone that would treat another human like that. Its wrong on every single level xxxx

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By *reen EyesMan
over a year ago

Wales

I think if it happens after one meet you can cope with it a little easier but it is still an awful feeling. It happened also to me after seeing someone for about 5 years. No real reason, some lies and it can be hard when you give a bit of ypur self to eachother and then it goes for you feel is no reason or you cannot understand why.

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By *wcouple 100Couple
over a year ago

Bridgend

It hasn't happened to me yet, but there are some I wish would

I tend to get the nutty stalker ladies, I think I need to be much worse at oral sex !

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By *lanka300Man
over a year ago

haverfordwest

Happened to me tonight. Been speaking for a few weeks getting on really well. Arranged a date to meet which I booked a hotel for. Haven’t spoken for a few days and then blocked tonight. No reason given and if I’m honest I’m really gutted.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get ghosted all the time night as well call myself Casper at this point lol

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By *ubergenieWoman
over a year ago

Neath

Ghosting happens because the person doing the ghosting is afraid of communication/confrontation. It doesn't make it ok to do, but it does mean that if you're being ghosted it's not about anything you've done, it's about that person's own hang ups.

Be reassured - it's not a reflection on you. If someone can't be honest or communicate effectively you wouldn't be able to have much of any kind of relationship.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It has happened to me also went on a lovely social had food good night all round and then I was blocked without reason.

It does knock you’re confidence but pick yourself up because their loss is someone else’s gain x

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By *weetnips69Woman
over a year ago

cardiff

Yeah hun happened to me very recently & does knock ur confidence & also makes you doubt the genuine ones on here.

Just man up & say sorry not for me or sorry I don’t think it’s working out. Xx

Take care & remember how beautiful inside & out u are xx

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By *coutDWoman
over a year ago

Pontypridd

"For those of you who don’t know, ghosting is when someone sleeps with someone or goes on a date etc then cuts them off, blocks their number, suddenly stops replying without an explanation.

Really sorry this has happened to you lovely. Happened to me a few times. Twice after meets, After chatting to others they told me the same had happened to them so that reassured me.

Another that I pretty much think

was substance induced. They later told my friend I was too busy to meet them after seeing the verification link between us. Their recollection and what’s app history clearly different to mine.

It definitely says more about them and their communication skills.

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By *ittle_miss_sassy86Woman
over a year ago

Swansea

Unfortunately, I think it’s happened to us all hunny.

It is a really shitty thing that a person can do.

But it happens a lot more than we think.

I always say, Honesty is the best policy but I don’t think people realise that, they’d rather do it the crappy way!!

I know it’s easier said than done we just gotta pick ourselves up and get on with it. Xxx

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By *elix85Man
over a year ago

Kings Lynn

Ghosting is crap. Like, just say you’ve lost interest?

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By *laytonAMan
over a year ago

Newport

Just been ghosted, first time and absolutely fuming. Shared loads of details and even went out to buy things specifically for meet. I get nobody has a right to a reply or to anything but why on earth go through all that just to bin someone off without any explanation. Anyone interested in a bottle of rose and some latex free condoms. Lol

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By *aribbean King 1985Man
over a year ago

South West London

Question is who does most of the ghosting, men or women?

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By *o againTV/TS
over a year ago

swansea

Happened to me years ago.. before all this technology shite. Crushed my self confidence for years. And I suppose I'm still not over it.. find it hard to trust anyone and to open up.

Jo xx

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By *elshunicornWoman
over a year ago

wales

Happened to me at the end of a long real life relationship and has happened so many times on here and the worlds worst place tinder. As someone who’s very open and honest about my mental health I do find it hard to deal with- as abandonment issues are a big part of my mental health condition. I realise hook ups and hook ups and I can remove emotion from sex etc- but being ghosted still hurts. It screws with my little confidence and I just wish they would send a message like- hey sorry this isn’t for me, or hey thanks for the sex etc. rather than ghost! It’s just cruel quite simply.

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By *ory_xWoman
over a year ago

42 Wallaby Way Syndey

"Question is who does most of the ghosting, men or women?"

Men in my experience

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By *laytonAMan
over a year ago

Newport

"Happened to me at the end of a long real life relationship and has happened so many times on here and the worlds worst place tinder. As someone who’s very open and honest about my mental health I do find it hard to deal with- as abandonment issues are a big part of my mental health condition. I realise hook ups and hook ups and I can remove emotion from sex etc- but being ghosted still hurts. It screws with my little confidence and I just wish they would send a message like- hey sorry this isn’t for me, or hey thanks for the sex etc. rather than ghost! It’s just cruel quite simply. "

This exactly everyone knows it is shit but some do it anyway.

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By *efByOrgasmsMan
over a year ago

Heads of the Valleys

I think this has happened to pretty much everyone. Happened to me a few times and I'd be a liar to say that I haven't done it in past.

Just try and not to let it get to you and move onwards and upwards is my advice.

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