FabSwingers.com forum: And the award for best opening message goes to….

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 09/03/23 10:36:50]

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

“I'd love to use a carrot as a dildo up your arse xxx”

I’d love to hear all the cracking lines you’ve all had. This place never fails to amaze me!!

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By *elshcouple18Couple
over a year ago

Cardiff

We've had a guy ask if he could come and 'clean up' after we've had sex.. told him where we keep the hoover and dusters, didn't hear from him again..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I was single on here, a guy messaged and asked if I would go over, give him a blowjob while his dog fucked me!

Needless to say he was reported and blocked! Lol

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By *andK78Couple
over a year ago

Newport

Can I impregnate you.

Nope, tubes tied sorry.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We've had a guy ask if he could come and 'clean up' after we've had sex.. told him where we keep the hoover and dusters, didn't hear from him again.. "

Haha

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Christ alive!! These though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Along the lines of

Hey man, want your cock sucked discreetly. I can pay

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“I'd love to use a carrot as a dildo up your arse xxx”

I’d love to hear all the cracking lines you’ve all had. This place never fails to amaze me!! "

Should of asked if the carrot was from the wonky veg range

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By *ory_xWoman
over a year ago

42 Wallaby Way Syndey

"I want to piss in your ass and shove in a butt plug. Then fuck you so hard the butt plug shoots out and piss everywhere"

Wtf like

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

""I want to piss in your ass and shove in a butt plug. Then fuck you so hard the butt plug shoots out and piss everywhere"

Wtf like

I’ve had the piss in my ass thing before. You win there though!!!

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By *ornysouthwalesMan
over a year ago

Merthyr Tydfil

And some men wonder why they never get replies, let alone meets

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By *oby le roneMan
over a year ago

Treorchy

""I want to piss in your ass and shove in a butt plug. Then fuck you so hard the butt plug shoots out and piss everywhere"

Wtf like

10/10 for imagination like, but what kinda diseased brain thinks that shit up

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By *oby le roneMan
over a year ago

Treorchy

"And some men wonder why they never get replies, let alone meets

Nooo it's very clear why we don't get replies

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By *ory_xWoman
over a year ago

42 Wallaby Way Syndey

Ive had pretty bad ones but that one just sticks in my mind

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I had one once where he asked me to go out with him wearing a plaster cast. He had a fetish for ‘ cast play ‘ apparently.

Get a lot of breast feeding messages too.

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By *untiWoman
over a year ago

Newport

Do I have false teeth?

Block button was hit VERY fast

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By *ameswills1Man
over a year ago

Some great message ideas for me to try, thank you forum

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By *ouble_Trouble_X2Couple
over a year ago

caerphilly

Omg where do we star?! Haha

Can you use me as a table and hubby fuck you on me?

(A couple) do you fancy role play and you guys can be our step parents!!

Do you enjoy period sex?

We could write a book of bizarre one liners!

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By *eppettoMan
over a year ago

Symonds Yat

Well I suppose, if you have a kink, this is the place to explore it.....

Although my deviations seem normal and positively tame in comparison....

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By *hisismeXXXMan
over a year ago

Welsh Wales

"Do I have false teeth?

Block button was hit VERY fast"

Don’t leave us hanging mun. Well, do you?

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By *ory_xWoman
over a year ago

42 Wallaby Way Syndey

Just had this

Wow love to get my throbbing cock in your sexy body and cum over them lushx tits x

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By *o againTV/TS
over a year ago

Swansea

"Just had this

Wow love to get my throbbing cock in your sexy body and cum over them lushx tits x"

Dear lord. I cant believe men think they are gonna get laid with that approach.

Or do they?

God I'm old fashion then.

Jo xx

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By *ancardiff7Man
over a year ago

Near Cowbridge

"Along the lines of

Hey man, want your cock sucked discreetly. I can pay"

How much did you charge?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The old classic of a bloke messaging me asking if I wanted to watch him fuck himself up the arse with a toilet brush. I asked him which end? I told me I could choose. I passed....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He* told me....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

'WOOF'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Stop messaging me, or I'll call the police.

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By *ory_xWoman
over a year ago

42 Wallaby Way Syndey

"Hey you up for watching me stroke my cock and blow my load for you? Xx"

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By *iss MaverickWoman
over a year ago

Cardiff

I get lots of Domme messages.. one in particular asked me if I’d use him as a “no limits toilet”….

not quite sure what he meant, and had no intention of finding out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The old classic of a bloke messaging me asking if I wanted to watch him fuck himself up the arse with a toilet brush. I asked him which end? I told me I could choose. I passed.... "

Smithy?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm probably boring, the ones offering free drugs for sex are disturbing. I would hope nobody ever accepts.

Or one that on the first message asking if he could come round and have sex with me on my period.

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By *elpful and caringMan
over a year ago

Scarborough

“Can I drink your bath water?”

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You are a farmer? Do you have a horse and dogs I can film my partner having sex with

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By *ory_xWoman
over a year ago

42 Wallaby Way Syndey

Got to love these

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Top 3 which stick in my mind for being most disturbing;

Will you shit in my mouth

If I was rimming you and you needed a wet fart would you do it in my mouth

You got the type of body which only deserves to be beaten black and blue

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh and another one. Guy had a breeding fetish but his partner didn’t want kids apparently. So Could he get me pregnant and have me as his secret family…he promised to pay child maintenance

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Oh and another one. Guy had a breeding fetish but his partner didn’t want kids apparently. So Could he get me pregnant and have me as his secret family…he promised to pay child maintenance

Sounds like a keeper

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By *oby le roneMan
over a year ago

Treorchy

"The old classic of a bloke messaging me asking if I wanted to watch him fuck himself up the arse with a toilet brush. I asked him which end? I told me I could choose. I passed.... "

You coward, should have asked just for shits and giggles

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By *iss MaverickWoman
over a year ago

Cardiff

"The old classic of a bloke messaging me asking if I wanted to watch him fuck himself up the arse with a toilet brush. I asked him which end? I told me I could choose. I passed....

You coward, should have asked just for shits and giggles

touché

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By *ubyRichardsWoman
over a year ago

Loughor

“Will you stop showering for 3 days and then let me lick you clean?” Ewwwwww

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By *ornysouthwalesMan
over a year ago

Merthyr Tydfil

Yuk

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By *arriedwelshcoupleCouple
over a year ago

Bridgend

Best one we received was just two words

'wuf wexy'

To this day we have no idea what it means

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By *ateCdfMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

I've just had one from a guy offering me 100 quid for him to give me a massage

It was 50 a couple of weeks ago, let's see how high we can get him

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By *reenleavesCouple
over a year ago

North Wales

'hey can I shit in your wife's knickers while I watch u fuck'

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By *edi123Couple
over a year ago

aberystwyth

[Removed by poster at 10/03/23 12:37:50]

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By *edi123Couple
over a year ago

aberystwyth

""I want to piss in your ass and shove in a butt plug. Then fuck you so hard the butt plug shoots out and piss everywhere"

Wtf like

Bonus, free enema ??

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By *oby le roneMan
over a year ago

Treorchy

"“Will you stop showering for 3 days and then let me lick you clean?” Ewwwwww"

Why just 3 days? Do 5 and sit on his head.

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By *he tunnelsCouple
over a year ago

newport

Hi baby , you got face photo ……

User joined 2 days ago

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By *exi_LexiTV/TS
over a year ago

caerphilly

Lmao, some of these are hilarious but awful to, I've been asked a few time can I role-play as thier mother

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By *andering Welsh GuyMan
over a year ago

All over the place

This is all that'd wrong with some of the creeps on this site

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By *andering Welsh GuyMan
over a year ago

All over the place

"Lmao, some of these are hilarious but awful to, I've been asked a few time can I role-play as thier mother "

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By *ameswills1Man
over a year ago

"Lmao, some of these are hilarious but awful to, I've been asked a few time can I role-play as thier mother "

I told you not to share this with anyone!! Haha

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By *ory_xWoman
over a year ago

42 Wallaby Way Syndey

"Lmao, some of these are hilarious but awful to, I've been asked a few time can I role-play as thier mother "

Oh yes had a few wanting this type of play

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By *ussypinkpawsWoman
over a year ago

port talbot

The offer of milk or cream happens almost every day and every one of the senders thinks it's original.

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By *iss MaverickWoman
over a year ago

Cardiff

"This is all that'd wrong with some of the creeps on this site "
don’t pretend some of these aren’t from you now Mr

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some absolute pearlers! Jesus you just think sometimes what goes on in people’s heads.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Some absolute pearlers! Jesus you just think sometimes what goes on in people’s heads. "

I dunno! You can give sone of these a run for their money

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Some absolute pearlers! Jesus you just think sometimes what goes on in people’s heads.

I dunno! You can give sone of these a run for their money

Wow now dora! Nothing wrong with sex wearing a backpack

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Just had

“ fuck off slut “

For basically telling a guy I wasn’t interested!! Haha!!

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By *omeoramboMan
over a year ago

Swansea

I recently had a guy send a message pretty much saying ( begging)..I KNOW YOU ARE STRAIGHT BUT CAN I COME OVER YOU WANK AND CUM IN MY MOUTH I won't touch you promise.

I was like dude seriously ffsakes

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By *ory_xWoman
over a year ago

42 Wallaby Way Syndey

"Lets have fun xx"

Hmmm lets not

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By *oby le roneMan
over a year ago

Treorchy

"Just had

“ fuck off slut “

For basically telling a guy I wasn’t interested!! Haha!!"

I don't know how you can resist such a charming and cunning linguist.

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By *efByOrgasmsMan
over a year ago

Heads of the Valleys

Every time a guy ask me for sex I just reply you can't afford me. That tends to stop them lol

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By *ory_xWoman
over a year ago

42 Wallaby Way Syndey

Just had....

Hi I would love to suck them titles and pussy everyday just to taste all your sweet come all over me face in the night I would fuck the shit out of your sweet pussy ?? ?? ?? make it jump your very beautiful woman

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By *o againTV/TS
over a year ago

Swansea

"Just had....

Now that a offer you cant refuse!! Lol

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By *ory_xWoman
over a year ago

42 Wallaby Way Syndey

I know right

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By *ory_xWoman
over a year ago

42 Wallaby Way Syndey

And another copy and paste message this time from London

Hey x I own a coffee shop situated inside a train station . As there are strikes today work is very quiet and I’m soon to close up .

What people don’t no is once these shutters are down the coffee man becomes EXTREMELY naughty lol

Are you currently free to let me watch your eyes watch my throbbing cock as I stroke and play with it whilst my shutters are down

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By *o againTV/TS
over a year ago

Swansea

Dear God.. slaps face with plam....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know understand why people hate singles on here majority fucking it for the minority

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By *o againTV/TS
over a year ago

Swansea

Ne asking for a coffee meet is a bit tame then!!!

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By *BC WalesMan
over a year ago

Swansea

I have had many guys ask to suck my cock discreetly despite my profile clearly stating that I am straight. Some of them have couple profiles. I have had to tell a guy that many gay and bi guys that I know are not dickheads so he should please not give the community a bad name. He messaged me again hoping I would change my mind so I added him to my block list. That said I have also had one or two instances where my opening line was not stellar and promptly apologised for the error of judgement. Considering that I always give a benefit of doubt that you won’t get it right all the time but being a persistent twat is the height for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And another copy and paste message this time from London

Hey x I own a coffee shop situated inside a train station . As there are strikes today work is very quiet and I’m soon to close up .

What people don’t no is once these shutters are down the coffee man becomes EXTREMELY naughty lol

Are you currently free to let me watch your eyes watch my throbbing cock as I stroke and play with it whilst my shutters are down"

I blocked this guy yesterday!

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By *orben dallas 52Man
over a year ago

llantwit major

"Along the lines of

Hey man, want your cock sucked discreetly. I can pay"

Get this allllll the bloody time haha

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By *orben dallas 52Man
over a year ago

llantwit major

"The old classic of a bloke messaging me asking if I wanted to watch him fuck himself up the arse with a toilet brush. I asked him which end? I told me I could choose. I passed.... "

I know a radiographer who had to X-ray a guy with a bog brush up his arse…..fell on it would you believe!

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

Wow some of these messages

Luckily never had a single message that made me think WTF but I've had my filters up from day one.

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By *ow DDWoman
over a year ago

just up your street

Had a message few hours ago, hi can I fuck one night £1000 pmsl I answered him £5000 no kissing no bj lmao still no reply as yet lol

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By *ekked JackMan
over a year ago

South Lanarkshire

Two I had in response to forum threads I started.

Kiss ,shag, smother in chocolate and lick it off. A message from a profile i had never looked at from the South of England.

"NONE"

Kiss Cuddle or Torture.

Again a profile from England I had never looked at.

"Torture"

When I asked why they replied

"It's thr only option thay guarantees we wouldn't have to physically touch you.

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By *hriscaroline36Couple
over a year ago

Treharris

The best we've ever had from someone in.dubai

"You invite me over. I arrive at yours and thr cuck will.open the door and invite me in. From that moment you will bith only say yes sir and thank you sir.

The cuck will walk me into the living room where your wife will be on her knees waiting for her master dolled up in heels and her toys laid out on a table for me to use, she might own her cuck but she will show him how submissive she can be with the right man"

It was that memorable we had to screenshot and keep for the occasional laugh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is it wrong, I'm jealous of your Tampon?

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By *exi_LexiTV/TS
over a year ago

caerphilly

Some of these just get better lol, the cheek on some people, but it's made me laugh so can't be all bad

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By *onwelshMan
over a year ago

Where the Dragons Live

I know you are straight, but wondering if you would like to sit back and let me rim your ass then milk you dry until you are bucking with pleasure.

Close your eyes and imagine im Angelina Jolie

Haha. Wtf mind

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By *ory_xWoman
over a year ago

42 Wallaby Way Syndey

Uhhh, right, just thinking up something very offensive. Em, right, I know just the thing, I'll send a cock pic! It's fully erect here and VERY red at the top, highly inappropriate for a first message, right.

At least I'm amusing myself...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve had a couple of “can I watch my bf give you a bj”, but nothing approaching but plug piss and toilet brush anal thankfully

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