FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to Wales

Single males

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I think I’ve sent over 200 messages and still not even 1 meet .. Meeting people on here is hard for single males , I think the socials & clubs are best haha … Be attending both soon so hopefully find some like minded and make some new friends

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *elsh_lass74Woman
over a year ago

South Wales

You have been here 6 weeks with 1 veri, that's good going by all accounts for a single guy!!

You say 200 messages have been sent?! Are you pebbledashing the site or do you read profiles to see if you are what they are looking for?!

And yes socials and clubs are the best way to meet people

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Socials and clubs definitely, show your face and let your personally come though

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I went to a club for that veri haha , went to a club & had a really good time .. I do get the socials & clubs , people get to know you better & can see your personality rather than messages and a selfie lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Yes most Definitely.. I say I sent 200 but I bet 100 ain’t even opened .. women & couples get so many so it’s hard for them to read all .. I do understand it ..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On a side note, when you are sending messages try and stay away from the " haha " and " lol " a lot of women have commented many many times in the forums that it is an instant no for them if they see it in a message, generally any type of txt speech

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Wow thanks for that information. I do say haha & lol quite a lot .. will most certainly keep that in mind ..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also messages that contain hehe or mmmmmm are off-putting

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *utty200Couple
over a year ago

nearby


"Also messages that contain hehe or mmmmmm are off-putting "

ah " mmmmmmm" the classic passion killer , I don't think guys realise how ridiculous this appears when typed

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *FFB69Woman
over a year ago

Torfaen/Gwent

Maybe it's an age thing but "haha" or "lol" don't put me off at all.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ammo2k20Man
over a year ago

Newport


"Maybe it's an age thing but "haha" or "lol" don't put me off at all. "

Exactly everyone is different! Hmmmmmm LOL there I love looking ridiculous!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *r WhispererMan
over a year ago

brynmawr

I was in the same boat until I started going to some socials.. single guys get so few responses to messages but getting out and meeting people is so much better.. I’ve made quite a few good friends from Newport and Blackwood socials

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *leasure-QueenWoman
over a year ago

The twilight zone

The more effort you put in, the more rewards you reap. If you’re sending 200 generic copy and paste messages I doubt that will make you successful.

As it’s been said by others numerous times, the socials and clubs are the best way to network and make new connections.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Funny that though, the best meet I've ever had off of this site we invested over two hundred messages over the course of about eight/nine weeks before we finally met and had a mind blowing time. We're still friends now. Ironically she uses "haha" in pretty much every message!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Good things come to those who wait haha

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Funny that though, the best meet I've ever had off of this site we invested over two hundred messages over the course of about eight/nine weeks before we finally met and had a mind blowing time. We're still friends now. Ironically she uses "haha" in pretty much every message! "

Everyone is different, as demonstrated In this thread, one lady said it puts her off as did a couple, then again another lady said it doesn't bother her. The op has asked for input/suggestions there's no right or wrong answer but if he is putting these types of messages out and getting nowhere then the suggestion/advice was to maybe try a different approach and see how that goes

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ammo2k20Man
over a year ago

Newport


"Funny that though, the best meet I've ever had off of this site we invested over two hundred messages over the course of about eight/nine weeks before we finally met and had a mind blowing time. We're still friends now. Ironically she uses "haha" in pretty much every message! "

I trump that let's do 201

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Yessssss let’s do it .. 201 could be my lucky meet

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uxuriantexhibitionistWoman
over a year ago

Middle of nowhere

I don’t reply to generic messages or those that haven’t read my profile, or those that have read profile and decided my preferences don’t apply to them.

Best tip on fab is to tailor your message to the person/profile.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ord MarmiteMan
over a year ago

BRIDGEND

*sigh. Here I go again....

You can send the same 'funny' or clever message to 300 different profiles on here. The responses will vary. You might get one positive response from all that and even then it can depend on the mood of the recipient.

Your opening message is exactly like walking up to stranger (and hoping you can have sex with them later) in a nightclub or pub when you do it on here. Only in those venues you get a lot more anonymity. You can try the same routine on 50 different ladies and none of them will know each other or even know what you have been up to. On here, good luck. Because the ladies chat. All the time, with each other. They help keep each other safe. If you have tried the same approach with more than half a dozen ladies then you can give up. Try something new. Like going to a club or social from here and actually seeing if you're able to get someone's interest with your personality and charm. Or physical attributes. Basically anything that let's them know that you are actually pretty safe for a one night stand and not some serial murdering rapist that likes to boast about things on the Internet afterwards.....

It might be a swingers site. That doesn't mean that you get to say the right words 200 times to 200 different ladies and get one to respond positively. If ladies don't know you or have a point of reference, they will not bother.

Unless they are feeling predatory or particularly hungry and then that's something else entirely and they will let you know rather than you being 'lucky' with a message (most of the time) .

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lwaysHangryMan
over a year ago

newport

If I've learned one thing on here in relation to talking to women, it's this...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ord MarmiteMan
over a year ago

BRIDGEND


"If I've learned one thing on here in relation to talking to women, it's this..."

I do hope you were talking about my previous post.

I am trying to be fair to the ladies on here when I say this...

But come on guys. We outnumber ladies by at least 75:1.

You can bet your bottom dollar that the funky funny charismatic first message you sent was sent at least 25 times by 25 other guys first. And so the ladies have heard it all before. Nothing about you makes you special just because you sent it and you feel important. Because if you feel that way after sending a message, you are just proving the lady right in her belief that you are just 'after a shag'. And that's not always what swinging is about. Do it 200 times and you aren't special. If anything you are worse off.

This site is too commercialised, too popular with people looking for a quick fix and unless you have the body of Adonis and the personality of Romeo in your opening message, you can kiss your arse goodbye. Get along to the actual swinging scene IN PERSON and you will get the rewards from what you have given. Some people do well, some do not. Attending the events doesn't mean guaranteed 'something or other' . But you can increase your chances of finding something positive there because at least you made the fecking effort and ladies can see you. Instead of being lost in the sea of same or similar messages and pics on here.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If I've learned one thing on here in relation to talking to women, it's this...

I do hope you were talking about my previous post.

I am trying to be fair to the ladies on here when I say this...

But come on guys. We outnumber ladies by at least 75:1.

You can bet your bottom dollar that the funky funny charismatic first message you sent was sent at least 25 times by 25 other guys first. And so the ladies have heard it all before. Nothing about you makes you special just because you sent it and you feel important. Because if you feel that way after sending a message, you are just proving the lady right in her belief that you are just 'after a shag'. And that's not always what swinging is about. Do it 200 times and you aren't special. If anything you are worse off.

This site is too commercialised, too popular with people looking for a quick fix and unless you have the body of Adonis and the personality of Romeo in your opening message, you can kiss your arse goodbye. Get along to the actual swinging scene IN PERSON and you will get the rewards from what you have given. Some people do well, some do not. Attending the events doesn't mean guaranteed 'something or other' . But you can increase your chances of finding something positive there because at least you made the fecking effort and ladies can see you. Instead of being lost in the sea of same or similar messages and pics on here. "
never a truer word spoken _ord marmite.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hil_u_upMan
over a year ago

swansea


".... Are you pebbledashing the site ....."

Love your choice of metaphor!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *3xymamaWoman
over a year ago

Uptown Top Ranking


"*sigh. Here I go again....

You can send the same 'funny' or clever message to 300 different profiles on here. The responses will vary. You might get one positive response from all that and even then it can depend on the mood of the recipient.

Your opening message is exactly like walking up to stranger (and hoping you can have sex with them later) in a nightclub or pub when you do it on here. Only in those venues you get a lot more anonymity. You can try the same routine on 50 different ladies and none of them will know each other or even know what you have been up to. On here, good luck. Because the ladies chat. All the time, with each other. They help keep each other safe. If you have tried the same approach with more than half a dozen ladies then you can give up. Try something new. Like going to a club or social from here and actually seeing if you're able to get someone's interest with your personality and charm. Or physical attributes. Basically anything that let's them know that you are actually pretty safe for a one night stand and not some serial murdering rapist that likes to boast about things on the Internet afterwards.....

It might be a swingers site. That doesn't mean that you get to say the right words 200 times to 200 different ladies and get one to respond positively. If ladies don't know you or have a point of reference, they will not bother.

Unless they are feeling predatory or particularly hungry and then that's something else entirely and they will let you know rather than you being 'lucky' with a message (most of the time) . "

You are right LM, a lot of us ladies do talk to each and will warn each other about certain guys/people on here. We tend to look out for each other. I found this was great, especially when I first joined fab...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"*sigh. Here I go again....

You can send the same 'funny' or clever message to 300 different profiles on here. The responses will vary. You might get one positive response from all that and even then it can depend on the mood of the recipient.

Your opening message is exactly like walking up to stranger (and hoping you can have sex with them later) in a nightclub or pub when you do it on here. Only in those venues you get a lot more anonymity. You can try the same routine on 50 different ladies and none of them will know each other or even know what you have been up to. On here, good luck. Because the ladies chat. All the time, with each other. They help keep each other safe. If you have tried the same approach with more than half a dozen ladies then you can give up. Try something new. Like going to a club or social from here and actually seeing if you're able to get someone's interest with your personality and charm. Or physical attributes. Basically anything that let's them know that you are actually pretty safe for a one night stand and not some serial murdering rapist that likes to boast about things on the Internet afterwards.....

It might be a swingers site. That doesn't mean that you get to say the right words 200 times to 200 different ladies and get one to respond positively. If ladies don't know you or have a point of reference, they will not bother.

Unless they are feeling predatory or particularly hungry and then that's something else entirely and they will let you know rather than you being 'lucky' with a message (most of the time) . "

My opening is message is exactly how I would treat a stranger , very polite & just being nice .. most messages will be the same yea because it’s a opening line, it’s then when the lady replies then we get chatting about different things, everyone is different so each chat after the opening chat will be tailored to that person .. so the same approach for the opening message will be more than likely the same .. my point being if you read the thread that a lot don’t get open because woman have so many .. that’s why I said clubs & socials. Went to a club the other week & had loads of fun .. it’s because when you meet in person you get a vibe & easy chat ..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If I've learned one thing on here in relation to talking to women, it's this...

I do hope you were talking about my previous post.

I am trying to be fair to the ladies on here when I say this...

But come on guys. We outnumber ladies by at least 75:1.

You can bet your bottom dollar that the funky funny charismatic first message you sent was sent at least 25 times by 25 other guys first. And so the ladies have heard it all before. Nothing about you makes you special just because you sent it and you feel important. Because if you feel that way after sending a message, you are just proving the lady right in her belief that you are just 'after a shag'. And that's not always what swinging is about. Do it 200 times and you aren't special. If anything you are worse off.

This site is too commercialised, too popular with people looking for a quick fix and unless you have the body of Adonis and the personality of Romeo in your opening message, you can kiss your arse goodbye. Get along to the actual swinging scene IN PERSON and you will get the rewards from what you have given. Some people do well, some do not. Attending the events doesn't mean guaranteed 'something or other' . But you can increase your chances of finding something positive there because at least you made the fecking effort and ladies can see you. Instead of being lost in the sea of same or similar messages and pics on here. "

Reading all this stuff you have put on here has most certainly made me realise this site is not for me . Taking advice of a man named _ord marmite is drawing the like . Best of luck to all the single males reading your advice ..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And don’t say ‘ charms ‘ because that’s instant ick.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"And don’t say ‘ charms ‘ because that’s instant ick. "

What you mean ick ? Lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top