FabSwingers.com forum: Please stop the hate....

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I find the way people seem to think this is an excuse to insult people constantly, is fueling part of the problem.

This situation has brought out the worst of humanity. However, spreading hate and condemnation isn't helping anyone.

The vast majority are not deliberately trying to break to new rules.

They are trying to feed their families, maintain their livelihoods to keep roofs over their heads, they are trying to maintain some level of non existent normality.

They are trying to keep their mental health. People are trying to survive this as best they can.

Compassion, understanding, support and kindness seems to have been lost completely by many people because its almost easier to make judgments and foster anger and frustration.

We are all in this together but we must remember we are all experiencing it differently.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Most sensible post I have seen on the whole virus issue. Well said.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Here’s the problem though: whilst I completely understand the desire to maintain a semblance of normality we are undeniably in extraordinarily dangerous circumstances.

Therefore if you leave home you are potentially endangering the lives of people like healthcare staff who are relied upon to save lives.

Please don’t make their lives any harder than they gave to be by staying at home.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I find the way people seem to think this is an excuse to insult people constantly, is fueling part of the problem.

This situation has brought out the worst of humanity. However, spreading hate and condemnation isn't helping anyone.

The vast majority are not deliberately trying to break to new rules.

They are trying to feed their families, maintain their livelihoods to keep roofs over their heads, they are trying to maintain some level of non existent normality.

They are trying to keep their mental health. People are trying to survive this as best they can.

Compassion, understanding, support and kindness seems to have been lost completely by many people because its almost easier to make judgments and foster anger and frustration.

We are all in this together but we must remember we are all experiencing it differently."

Going outside and socialising isn’t helping to feed your family. That, I believe, is what people are being criticised for. These aren’t normal times and we shouldn’t expect to live a normal life - if people feel like they are, then they’re not doing the right Thing. The sooner people realise this, the better we will all be.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Here’s the problem though: whilst I completely understand the desire to maintain a semblance of normality we are undeniably in extraordinarily dangerous circumstances.

Therefore if you leave home you are potentially endangering the lives of people like healthcare staff who are relied upon to save lives.

Please don’t make their lives any harder than they gave to be by staying at home."

No where in my post did I suggest people shouldn't follow the guidance....

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I find the way people seem to think this is an excuse to insult people constantly, is fueling part of the problem.

This situation has brought out the worst of humanity. However, spreading hate and condemnation isn't helping anyone.

The vast majority are not deliberately trying to break to new rules.

They are trying to feed their families, maintain their livelihoods to keep roofs over their heads, they are trying to maintain some level of non existent normality.

They are trying to keep their mental health. People are trying to survive this as best they can.

Compassion, understanding, support and kindness seems to have been lost completely by many people because its almost easier to make judgments and foster anger and frustration.

We are all in this together but we must remember we are all experiencing it differently.

Again no where in my post did I suggest people shouldn't follow guidance

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Here’s the problem though: whilst I completely understand the desire to maintain a semblance of normality we are undeniably in extraordinarily dangerous circumstances.

Therefore if you leave home you are potentially endangering the lives of people like healthcare staff who are relied upon to save lives.

Please don’t make their lives any harder than they gave to be by staying at home.

No where in my post did I suggest people shouldn't follow the guidance.... "

But you’re talking about people not deliberately breaking the rules (I read that as contravention of the advice to socially distance and remain at home) because they wish to maintain a level of normality and are going to work etc.

I posit the danger they pose to themselves and the public at large makes it necessary for them to be told to stick with the guidance.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I find the way people seem to think this is an excuse to insult people constantly, is fueling part of the problem.

This situation has brought out the worst of humanity. However, spreading hate and condemnation isn't helping anyone.

The vast majority are not deliberately trying to break to new rules.

They are trying to feed their families, maintain their livelihoods to keep roofs over their heads, they are trying to maintain some level of non existent normality.

They are trying to keep their mental health. People are trying to survive this as best they can.

Compassion, understanding, support and kindness seems to have been lost completely by many people because its almost easier to make judgments and foster anger and frustration.

We are all in this together but we must remember we are all experiencing it differently.

Again no where in my post did I suggest people shouldn't follow guidance "

It reads as though you’re defending the actions of those not social-distancing. They are the ones, after all, who are coming in for criticism. Perhaps you could clarify whose behaviours and actions you’re defending x

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

I suspect in a similar way , the underlying attitudes and ignorance that came to the surface during Brexit, is happening now.

I know best

I have no brain of my own

You’re an idiot

I don’t like you you’re different

Etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" Again no where in my post did I suggest people shouldn't follow guidance "

Sorry but in another thread you did say someone who professed to having left home yesterday hadn’t done anything wrong?

Seems contradictory.

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

"I suspect in a similar way , the underlying attitudes and ignorance that came to the surface during Brexit, is happening now.

I know best

I have no brain of my own

You’re an idiot

I don’t like you you’re different

Etc "

And most important .... that’s not yours, it’s mine, give it back....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" It reads as though you’re defending the actions of those not social-distancing. They are the ones, after all, who are coming in for criticism. Perhaps you could clarify whose behaviours and actions you’re defending x"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ok solve this conundrum. Current LTA guidelines issued on FRIDAY 20TH MARCH no less states that tennis is currently a government approved activity as it can be managed and played in a way that means social distancing is easy to achieve subject to simple things like clubhouses being closed, use your own balls, don't change ends Travel to venue in your own car and a few other suggestions.

Fair enough but

Have the LTA HQ have considered the big white sign on the Podiums whenever Boris is in our lounges. How are we supposed to stay at home and play tennis at the same time. (yes I have a Wii still LOL) The LTA should take the lead here and request closure of all clubs. It's just not tenable what they are doing and is a nonsense like a lot of things going on.

My Partner works in a supermarket, very much the front line at the moment and nearly everyday comes home with tales of rude customers that refuse to accept their tills wont let them put more than 3 tins of beans through. Yes I know you'd queued for an hour to get 6 tins and your wife is with you but the till wont let me put them through. Every day hundreds of people walk past her. She doesn't have a mask or a gown to protect her. Another strange anomaly in all this madness.

Hey ho such is life in 2020.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

" Again no where in my post did I suggest people shouldn't follow guidance

Sorry but in another thread you did say someone who professed to having left home yesterday hadn’t done anything wrong?

Seems contradictory."

Yes he took his children to the grave yard to see their dead mum. No one else was around. Really are you so heartless to comdem that??

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By *oi_LucyCouple
over a year ago

Barbados

"I suspect in a similar way , the underlying attitudes and ignorance that came to the surface during Brexit, is happening now.

I know best

I have no brain of my own

You’re an idiot

I don’t like you you’re different

Etc "

Indeed. And ignoring facts in front of them. Yes we could all do with being a bit nicer (me included) but when you have people who deliberately put others at harm due to their refusal to acknowledge the situation.

-Matt

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By *yx_InannaWoman
over a year ago

Burslem

"Here’s the problem though: whilst I completely understand the desire to maintain a semblance of normality we are undeniably in extraordinarily dangerous circumstances.

Therefore if you leave home you are potentially endangering the lives of people like healthcare staff who are relied upon to save lives.

Please don’t make their lives any harder than they gave to be by staying at home."

A large percentage of people suffering mental health you'll find the most notable reason for mortality rates among people with mental health issues is loneliness, isolation from human connection.

During this pandemic you'll discover a lot of anxiety about the virus itself already. Fear of death by the virus then add on isolation.

Being alone with one's thoughts and no actual social connection the more likely the outcome is going to be the same whether they have the virus or not.

But people don't get that because a lot of people with anxiety about the virus you develop hate to someone who could potentially infect you. Your considerations are about yourself. So compassion for others is out of the window. Lack empathy for people who need to make sure they are balanced.

All I can say for everyone isolating welcome to my norm. Soon enough loneliness will have an effect where you crave human company for the soul reason humans are social creatures.

Mental health is delicate and when you lack real social interaction thats when things breakdown. You'll sacrifice in order to get what you need to survive.

There's a limit to how much interaction through digital means can help.

Let me put this bluntly, do you prefer they die by their own hands or risk the virus which only has a possibility of being caught and then the possibility of killing them. Suicide won't be a statistic of the virus but it should be.

If people didn't have mental health issues before the virus there's a high chance they will before the end of the epidemic.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think the biggest challenge is changing people's mindsets and quickly.

They can have all the obvious signs of things shutting down around them, the guidelines and what to do screamed in their ears, tales of people dying and the NHS flat out.

Yet a bit of sunshine and they will flock to the park and sit like a flock of seagulls with brains the same simply because with the British climate coming out of winter that is what they have done all their lives.

They will on the last days the pubs are open go out and mingle in their thousands getting pissed up, especially the young as for many under 25s one of the most important things in life is getting off your box.

Shoppers will ram a car park outside the supermarkets, intent on stockpiling and acquiring bargains as it's what they've done all their lives.

A lot of cornershop owners up and down the land will buy up half the stock in desired lines from supermarkets before ramping up the price and sticking it up for sale in their premises. As to huge swathes of this community known for being tough-minded small business owners, profit is the most important consideration.

It's breaking habits and pulls of lifetimes that presents the hardest challenge. It may sound silly to a rational person without these instilled mindsets, but perhaps the only thing that will jog and "reset" their potentially dangerous ways of thinking will be being on the receiving end of a water cannon, a cloud of tear gas or a riot officer's baton.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes he took his children to the grave yard to see their dead mum. No one else was around. Really are you so heartless to comdem that?? "

Call me heartless and throw all the ad hominems my way but ask the frontline nurses and doctors who are posting on Fab after shifts seeing people die right in front of them from coronavirus what they’d want people to do right now.

Stay at home.

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By *icknHMan
over a year ago

Ilfracombe

Spot on !

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By *az080378Woman
over a year ago

Cromer

"I think the biggest challenge is changing people's mindsets and quickly.

They can have all the obvious signs of things shutting down around them, the guidelines and what to do screamed in their ears, tales of people dying and the NHS flat out.

Shoppers will ram a car park outside the supermarkets, intent on stockpiling and acquiring bargains as it's what they've done all their lives.

Totally agree,it's also that mindset of "it will never happen to me"

I don't get it whatsoever

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I think the op makes a good point.

My personal opinion is that there are some very unpleasant attitudes being displayed on social media and the wider media along side the very positive and selfless actions being shown by many.

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By *estivalMan
over a year ago

borehamwood

im still having to go out.my last full week at work then onto three day weeks on 60% salary.dnt belive everything about goverment paying everyone 80% of salary.my firm already looking into it because it only chance my firm got of coming out the other side of it.basically been told we wont be entitled to it unless we go into complete lockdown.and if they shut the airlines down i wont have a job to go back to anyway

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By *oggoneMan
over a year ago

Derry

"I think the op makes a good point.

My personal opinion is that there are some very unpleasant attitudes being displayed on social media and the wider media along side the very positive and selfless actions being shown by many.

At the best of times social media is a hate fest of oneupmanship, passive aggressiveness and all the worst of human nature. Something like CV19 will bring out the worst in people. Similarly I thought some of the media was reveling in all of this. The only people we can change is ourselves. We have been asked to stay in our homes, avoid going out if possible, and practice social distancing. I remember Mrs Thatcher's response 'there's no thing as society' In other words, we're all just individuals acting in our own self interest.

It's unfortunate but some individuals cannot accept how their actions are part of a bigger picture or for a greater good.

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