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"Diagnosed! I don’t use fab to arrange private meets very often (if at all). Along with personal reasons, arranging anything is just not my forte 🤣 I instead use it as a tool to get chatting to people who are going to the same events. That also means I can memorise topics of conversation for when I get there 😅. And absolutely, everything is motivated by catching that sweet dopamine hit. A large proportion of people who are neuro divergent have non vanilla interests for that reason." That last sentence has really struck a cord with me, must admit that I have never put that 2 and 2 together before.....interesting and thought provoking. | |||
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"I struggle with the social side of things, I don't really see the point. It's why I dont do well at clubs or parties, we're all here to fuck so why are we standing around chatting for hours? 😅" Exactly the same for me! When I show up, I'm there for a reason. J | |||
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"Undiagnosed here but been suggested many times that I may have hit a few spicy branches on the way down 😅 I struggle with the social side of things, I don't really see the point. It's why I dont do well at clubs or parties, we're all here to fuck so why are we standing around chatting for hours? 😅 On the flip side I absolutely can't instigate things so a bit of a catch 22" If you are anything like me horny but to shy to fuck syndrome I called it fab and yye Internet really helped with getting me laid, I’d never had sex without the internet | |||
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"Diagnosed! I don’t use fab to arrange private meets very often (if at all). Along with personal reasons, arranging anything is just not my forte 🤣 I instead use it as a tool to get chatting to people who are going to the same events. That also means I can memorise topics of conversation for when I get there 😅. And absolutely, everything is motivated by catching that sweet dopamine hit. A large proportion of people who are neuro divergent have non vanilla interests for that reason." Good point well made I think I only fab fir those non vanilla interests too | |||
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"I struggle with the social side of things, I don't really see the point. It's why I dont do well at clubs or parties, we're all here to fuck so why are we standing around chatting for hours? 😅 Exactly the same for me! When I show up, I'm there for a reason. J" I think it’s a bit of both ways sometimes I like done chit chat before getting naked other times it’s just good to be naked if you’re ready for action so to speak | |||
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"Undiagnosed here but been suggested many times that I may have hit a few spicy branches on the way down 😅 I struggle with the social side of things, I don't really see the point. It's why I dont do well at clubs or parties, we're all here to fuck so why are we standing around chatting for hours? 😅 On the flip side I absolutely can't instigate things so a bit of a catch 22" You’ve just described me! Shane I’m blocked from messaging you privatkybas yiure local to me! | |||
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"Candy is diagnosed and she is the same. She would rather skip the chat and just get down to it! " Girl after my own heart 😅 | |||
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"Undiagnosed here but been suggested many times that I may have hit a few spicy branches on the way down 😅 I struggle with the social side of things, I don't really see the point. It's why I dont do well at clubs or parties, we're all here to fuck so why are we standing around chatting for hours? 😅 On the flip side I absolutely can't instigate things so a bit of a catch 22" Diagnosed here, We don’t arrange meets here but only play at clubs. With this though means often getting that really awkward small talk conversation. Have you been here before, what other clubs have you been to, is it normally this busy/quiet. Took a lot of time to adjust to what we want and how to stop masking to get through it. We now play publically and invite people to join us, we are the same as what you said. We are all here to fuck so cut out the small talk and let’s get down to it lol. | |||
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"Candy is diagnosed and she is the same. She would rather skip the chat and just get down to it! " She sounds exactly like us lol | |||
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"Ah now I’m the other way round. Very rarely can I just get down to it, unless I’m already doing it (group/party). I need to like someone to want to fuck them. Love the social aspect, but will often need a day or two afterwards to isolate myself and recover. Agree that it’s a lot about the dopamine hits. I certainly get good ones!! What I struggle with most is the black and white of it all. The site often frustrates me and I can be quite blunt or ignore people altogether when I’m frustrated. And there’s also the rejection sensitivity side of it!! Wow, that brutal sometimes lol " Same! Well the first paragraph! I need them to make me tick. That doesn't happen through pics or just an introduction. Meeting at clubs makes things so much easier. | |||
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"Ah now I’m the other way round. Very rarely can I just get down to it, unless I’m already doing it (group/party). I need to like someone to want to fuck them. Love the social aspect, but will often need a day or two afterwards to isolate myself and recover. Agree that it’s a lot about the dopamine hits. I certainly get good ones!! What I struggle with most is the black and white of it all. The site often frustrates me and I can be quite blunt or ignore people altogether when I’m frustrated. And there’s also the rejection sensitivity side of it!! Wow, that brutal sometimes lol Same! Well the first paragraph! I need them to make me tick. That doesn't happen through pics or just an introduction. Meeting at clubs makes things so much easier. " Oh don’t get me wrong, whilst we are very much let’s get down to it, rather than lots of chat, there still needs to be attraction, it’s not just anybody we want to get down with lol. If we’ve decided we would then we would rather crack on than chat, if that makes sense lol | |||
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"Ah now I’m the other way round. Very rarely can I just get down to it, unless I’m already doing it (group/party). I need to like someone to want to fuck them. Love the social aspect, but will often need a day or two afterwards to isolate myself and recover. Agree that it’s a lot about the dopamine hits. I certainly get good ones!! What I struggle with most is the black and white of it all. The site often frustrates me and I can be quite blunt or ignore people altogether when I’m frustrated. And there’s also the rejection sensitivity side of it!! Wow, that brutal sometimes lol Same! Well the first paragraph! I need them to make me tick. That doesn't happen through pics or just an introduction. Meeting at clubs makes things so much easier. Oh don’t get me wrong, whilst we are very much let’s get down to it, rather than lots of chat, there still needs to be attraction, it’s not just anybody we want to get down with lol. If we’ve decided we would then we would rather crack on than chat, if that makes sense lol" Exactly this, not just everyone, but those I do want to, let's go 😅 | |||
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"Ah now I’m the other way round. Very rarely can I just get down to it, unless I’m already doing it (group/party). I need to like someone to want to fuck them. Love the social aspect, but will often need a day or two afterwards to isolate myself and recover. Agree that it’s a lot about the dopamine hits. I certainly get good ones!! What I struggle with most is the black and white of it all. The site often frustrates me and I can be quite blunt or ignore people altogether when I’m frustrated. And there’s also the rejection sensitivity side of it!! Wow, that brutal sometimes lol Same! Well the first paragraph! I need them to make me tick. That doesn't happen through pics or just an introduction. Meeting at clubs makes things so much easier. Oh don’t get me wrong, whilst we are very much let’s get down to it, rather than lots of chat, there still needs to be attraction, it’s not just anybody we want to get down with lol. If we’ve decided we would then we would rather crack on than chat, if that makes sense lol Exactly this, not just everyone, but those I do want to, let's go 😅" 100% in fairness the more people speak the more likely they are going to say that rubs one or both of us up the wrong way and it’s over before it’s begun lol Less talking more fucking lol | |||
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"I struggle with the written communication. I have no idea what people want to talk about, or why. Face to face, I'm okay with it, but can seem disinterested even when I'm not. " This is interesting because I actually wonder whether some of the frustration is Fab itself rather than necessarily being neurodivergent. I’m always quite happy to message first and get a conversation going, but I find I get ghosted quite a lot, which can be really annoying when you’ve actually made the effort to start a conversation. I wonder whether the simplicity of Fab is actually part of the problem? There aren’t really many tools to help a conversation develop naturally, so it can become very black and white — message, reply, disappear. Does anyone else think the site itself makes communication harder? | |||
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"I find the initial mundane pleasantries really difficult, i know my replies are terrible sometimes one or 2 words and quite literal. I am sure it has put people off me lots of times as they either think im not interested or cant be bothered carrying the conversation. Id much rather chat on the phone or have a social as i find it much easier face to face than online. I couldnt possibly go to a club that just wouldnt be for me would be too overwhelming being around all those people and in that environment but i do really enjoy the sex part. Its a bloody nightmare I can really relate to this. I’ve tried clubs and found the whole environment quite overwhelming. I think I’d much rather meet a smaller group of people where there’s a bit more opportunity to actually talk and get to know each other. I’m definitely not a “turn up and get straight down to it” person either. I like some conversation beforehand and afterwards. At the same time, I completely understand the need to decompress after a meet — even if you’ve really enjoyed yourself, social interaction can be quite draining. I wonder whether Fab could actually be better suited to people like us if the messaging side was a bit better developed? | |||
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"Ah now I’m the other way round. Very rarely can I just get down to it, unless I’m already doing it (group/party). I need to like someone to want to fuck them. Love the social aspect, but will often need a day or two afterwards to isolate myself and recover. Agree that it’s a lot about the dopamine hits. I certainly get good ones!! What I struggle with most is the black and white of it all. The site often frustrates me and I can be quite blunt or ignore people altogether when I’m frustrated. And there’s also the rejection sensitivity side of it!! Wow, that brutal sometimes lol Same! Well the first paragraph! I need them to make me tick. That doesn't happen through pics or just an introduction. Meeting at clubs makes things so much easier. Oh don’t get me wrong, whilst we are very much let’s get down to it, rather than lots of chat, there still needs to be attraction, it’s not just anybody we want to get down with lol. If we’ve decided we would then we would rather crack on than chat, if that makes sense lol Exactly this, not just everyone, but those I do want to, let's go 😅 100% in fairness the more people speak the more likely they are going to say that rubs one or both of us up the wrong way and it’s over before it’s begun lol Less talking more fucking lol" I can really relate to this. I’ve tried clubs and found the whole environment quite overwhelming. I think I’d much rather meet a smaller group of people where there’s a bit more opportunity to actually talk and get to know each other. I’m definitely not a “turn up and get straight down to it” person either. I like some conversation beforehand and afterwards. At the same time, I completely understand the need to decompress after a meet — even if you’ve really enjoyed yourself, social interaction can be quite draining. I wonder whether Fab could actually be better suited to people like us if the messaging side was a bit better developed? | |||
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" So I’m wondering: does Fab’s simplicity actually make it easier for neurodivergent people because there aren’t loads of complicated features, or does the lack of better conversation/social tools actually make it more frustrating? I’m genuinely curious what others think." For me it's the same with dating apps, the intent is there for everyone so it's easier to see flags compared to just trying to meet people in person. That said I don't find a lot of luck on those (except FB dating) so just understanding that those connections can be found is helpful to give a foundation for the time being before going back to clubs. | |||
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" So I’m wondering: does Fab’s simplicity actually make it easier for neurodivergent people because there aren’t loads of complicated features, or does the lack of better conversation/social tools actually make it more frustrating? I’m genuinely curious what others think. For me it's the same with dating apps, the intent is there for everyone so it's easier to see flags compared to just trying to meet people in person. That said I don't find a lot of luck on those (except FB dating) so just understanding that those connections can be found is helpful to give a foundation for the time being before going back to clubs." FB dating thats a new one on me | |||
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"Fabs does often hit the spot in terms of pics chat and forum... Learnt to stop deleting profiles and just have regular breaks and pure honesty with partner x" Totally agreed on deleted profiles, so hard to keep resetting and starting over from new | |||
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"I'm ND ADHD & definitely need that dopamine hit. Fab does facilitate that for me as I've figured out how to navigate it for my purposes. I do enjoy the social part of meeting & the lead up to anything more. I need to see if that persons desires aligns with mine. I see things in black & white & am pretty direct myself. My attention span isn't great & I become easily bored or distracted as new exciting "prospects" show up. I tend to explain all of this to those I'm interested in meeting & also say that I'm not being rude or ignorant if I don't reply to their messages for a few days, either on here or other platforms. It's because my focus has moved elsewhere. If someone of interest is not looking to actually meet up sometime soon, I move on fairly quickly as I get that urgency for the dopamine hit & I'm not waiting around for a "maybe", I'm looking for "Game on! Let's go!" " I really relate to the “Game on! Let’s go!” bit . I think that need for something to actually happen, rather than endless messaging and “maybe sometime”, really resonates with me. I do like the social side and getting to know someone first, though. I’m definitely not just looking for a quick fuck and gone — I like having some conversation and getting a feel for whether we actually click before meeting. I think that’s probably why the whole Fab thing can be a bit frustrating for me. I’m quite happy to make the first move, but then you can end up getting ghosted or having a conversation just fade away, which drives me mad! Grrrrrr But when there’s a mutual interest and someone says “right, let’s actually do this”... yeah, definitely **Game on! Let’s go!** | |||
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"I truely think alot of the 'meet now' folks are leaning into their ADHD. With some short sporadic convos to give the illusion of consistancy, one rapid communication of likes, limits have led some great experiences leaning in for seeking a dopamine hit with another human. These meets are usually ONS in nature, simply for the novelty i think. When i joined 10 years ago i would let the Adhd lead but the autism rules these days for safety reasons. Rejection sensitivity is incredibly difficult to navigate in text convos, especially since im often speaking to other ND people, more convos crash out because i have triggered that in someone than any other reason. I think getting onto the phone or a social help massively. Skip the small talk i seek a depth of mind and D 😂 " I tend to agree. I'm not sure whether adding ADHD to a profile helps or hinders the chances of a hookup, but I do think it gives people some context for how you communicate. Where I really agree is that text can be a minefield, especially between ND people. It's so easy for tone to be misread, assumptions to creep in, or rejection sensitivity to get triggered on either side. For me, getting onto a phone call or meeting socially cuts through a lot of that. Some people love the constant message back-and-forth, but others just aren't built for that style of communication. A 20-minute conversation usually tells me more than days of texting ever could. | |||
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" I tend to agree. I'm not sure whether adding ADHD to a profile helps or hinders the chances of a hookup, but I do think it gives people some context for how you communicate. Where I really agree is that text can be a minefield, especially between ND people. It's so easy for tone to be misread, assumptions to creep in, or rejection sensitivity to get triggered on either side. For me, getting onto a phone call or meeting socially cuts through a lot of that. Some people love the constant message back-and-forth, but others just aren't built for that style of communication. A 20-minute conversation usually tells me more than days of texting ever could." I had ND on my profile for a little while but it attracted 'i think autistic girls are hott' types. Even commenting on these threads kinda opens us up to over familiar approaches or those with malicious intentions. Truely think we find one another anyway without the label on our profiles. I like replying to 'theres something about you' with "its diagnosable" 😂 Im definatly one of those 'not built for that style of communication' i tend to end interactions around 2 weeks into solely texting, cant handle the daily demand of 'good morning, have a good day' 'ive finished work, hope youve had a good day' style interactions, their only benifit is that you see a pattern to someomes day/week and potential availability. As you say so much more can be gleened from 20mins on the phone than endless shallow messaging over days to weeks. But if someones only had time to text and maybe hint at a social without ever having time for a call.. I figure they dont have time for a social or a meet. | |||
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" I tend to agree. I'm not sure whether adding ADHD to a profile helps or hinders the chances of a hookup, but I do think it gives people some context for how you communicate. Where I really agree is that text can be a minefield, especially between ND people. It's so easy for tone to be misread, assumptions to creep in, or rejection sensitivity to get triggered on either side. For me, getting onto a phone call or meeting socially cuts through a lot of that. Some people love the constant message back-and-forth, but others just aren't built for that style of communication. A 20-minute conversation usually tells me more than days of texting ever could. I had ND on my profile for a little while but it attracted 'i think autistic girls are hott' types. Even commenting on these threads kinda opens us up to over familiar approaches or those with malicious intentions. Truely think we find one another anyway without the label on our profiles. I like replying to 'theres something about you' with "its diagnosable" 😂 Im definatly one of those 'not built for that style of communication' i tend to end interactions around 2 weeks into solely texting, cant handle the daily demand of 'good morning, have a good day' 'ive finished work, hope youve had a good day' style interactions, their only benifit is that you see a pattern to someomes day/week and potential availability. As you say so much more can be gleened from 20mins on the phone than endless shallow messaging over days to weeks. But if someones only had time to text and maybe hint at a social without ever having time for a call.. I figure they dont have time for a social or a meet. " I do wonder whether there could be a group or forum specifically for ADHD/ND people who are genuine about actually getting out and doing things — somewhere with some sort of verification, where people are there to find others who genuinely want to meet up, rather than spending weeks messaging or using it as a dating app. I think I’d find that much more appealing. | |||
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" I do wonder whether there could be a group or forum specifically for ADHD/ND people who are genuine about actually getting out and doing things — somewhere with some sort of verification, where people are there to find others who genuinely want to meet up, rather than spending weeks messaging or using it as a dating app. I think I’d find that much more appealing." This isnt a ND issue. Its a common complaint on fab. People can use the site however they like. Its down to open communication weather we find folks seeking the same experiances as we are. Personally i dont know if i want to meet someone before i have spoken to them. Or even after ive solely spoken to them. I dont make that decision until after a social. I do agree there should be an 'impatient' 'indiscriminate ons meet' selectable option so people can filter in or out of such arrangements. | |||
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"I was wondering if anyone else here is neurodivergent (ADHD, autism, AuDHD, etc.) and finds themselves using Fab partly for the dopamine hit? For me, I enjoy chatting, flirting and the excitement of browsing profiles. I also enjoy arranging threesomes and foursomes, but I often find it difficult to actually organise them through here. I can get caught up in the excitement of the idea, then struggle with the planning and follow-through. I'm interested to know if anyone else has a similar experience. Does your ADHD or autism affect how you use Fab? Do you find the messaging, arranging meets, or social side easier or harder than expected? Have you found any strategies that work for you? It would be interesting to hear from others who can relate." I'm undiagnosed but my gp says it is aspergus. Nhs refused to diagnose me due to my age. But I know exactly what tiu mean about coming on here, it is like an addiction | |||
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" I tend to agree. I'm not sure whether adding ADHD to a profile helps or hinders the chances of a hookup, but I do think it gives people some context for how you communicate. Where I really agree is that text can be a minefield, especially between ND people. It's so easy for tone to be misread, assumptions to creep in, or rejection sensitivity to get triggered on either side. For me, getting onto a phone call or meeting socially cuts through a lot of that. Some people love the constant message back-and-forth, but others just aren't built for that style of communication. A 20-minute conversation usually tells me more than days of texting ever could. I had ND on my profile for a little while but it attracted 'i think autistic girls are hott' types. Even commenting on these threads kinda opens us up to over familiar approaches or those with malicious intentions. Truely think we find one another anyway without the label on our profiles. I like replying to 'theres something about you' with "its diagnosable" 😂 Im definatly one of those 'not built for that style of communication' i tend to end interactions around 2 weeks into solely texting, cant handle the daily demand of 'good morning, have a good day' 'ive finished work, hope youve had a good day' style interactions, their only benifit is that you see a pattern to someomes day/week and potential availability. As you say so much more can be gleened from 20mins on the phone than endless shallow messaging over days to weeks. But if someones only had time to text and maybe hint at a social without ever having time for a call.. I figure they dont have time for a social or a meet. I do wonder whether there could be a group or forum specifically for ADHD/ND people who are genuine about actually getting out and doing things — somewhere with some sort of verification, where people are there to find others who genuinely want to meet up, rather than spending weeks messaging or using it as a dating app. I think I’d find that much more appealing." A ND area of fab was requested by multiple people on the threads I've attached but It looks that will never happen. Tbf I'd be very surprised if I've come across any neurotypical people on fab or the club scene haha. P.S a 20 minute phone call with a stranger would make me feel 🤢 P1 - https://fabswingers.com/forum/support/1346028 P2 - https://fabswingers.com/forum/support/1369444 P3 - https://fabswingers.com/forum/support/1374628 P4 - https://fabswingers.com/forum/support/1375399 P5 - https://fabswingers.com/forum/support/1378212 P6 - https://fabswingers.com/forum/support/1379859 P7 - https://www.fabswingers.com/forum/support/1384337 P8 - https://fabswingers.com/forum/support/1385017 P9 - https://m.fabswingers.com/forum/swingers/1386683 P10 - https://www.fabswingers.com/forum/swingers/138935 P11 - https://www.fabswingers.com/forum/swingers/1402246 P12 -https://www.fabswingers.com/forum/swingers/1409222 P13 -https://www.fabswingers.com/forum/swingers/1420947 P14 -https://www.fabswingers.com/forum/swingers/1432224 P15- https://www.fabswingers.com/forum/swingers/1447141 | |||
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"I was wondering if anyone else here is neurodivergent (ADHD, autism, AuDHD, etc.) and finds themselves using Fab partly for the dopamine hit? For me, I enjoy chatting, flirting and the excitement of browsing profiles. I also enjoy arranging threesomes and foursomes, but I often find it difficult to actually organise them through here. I can get caught up in the excitement of the idea, then struggle with the planning and follow-through. I'm interested to know if anyone else has a similar experience. Does your ADHD or autism affect how you use Fab? Do you find the messaging, arranging meets, or social side easier or harder than expected? Have you found any strategies that work for you? It would be interesting to hear from others who can relate." Absolutely. Diagnosed and medicated. Still apend a lot of time dopamine seeking. Just now I have more focus while doing it. | |||
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"Undiagnosed here but been suggested many times that I may have hit a few spicy branches on the way down 😅 I struggle with the social side of things, I don't really see the point. It's why I dont do well at clubs or parties, we're all here to fuck so why are we standing around chatting for hours? 😅 On the flip side I absolutely can't instigate things so a bit of a catch 22" One of my issues. I suck at small talk. It is either straight to the point or an interrogation if someone says something which interests me. | |||
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"I find the initial mundane pleasantries really difficult, i know my replies are terrible sometimes one or 2 words and quite literal. I am sure it has put people off me lots of times as they either think im not interested or cant be bothered carrying the conversation. Id much rather chat on the phone or have a social as i find it much easier face to face than online. I couldnt possibly go to a club that just wouldnt be for me would be too overwhelming being around all those people and in that environment but i do really enjoy the sex part. Its a bloody nightmare This whole thread is giving me hope. I am pushing myself to go out to places but I find the small talk chit chat bizzare especially when there is so muxh noise and stimulus. My replies are wither overly long as though I thought they wanted a well thought out answer or two words because that is all that is needed as an answer. Apparently neither of them responses is correct. So may just look for other neurodivergents. | |||
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"I strongly believe everyone on fab is neurodiverse, whether they know it or not " Naa, I don't agree Some are just jizz beasts | |||
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"I strongly believe everyone on fab is neurodiverse, whether they know it or not Naa, I don't agree Some are just jizz beasts" What if you're a ADHD jizz beast? | |||
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"I've got autism, and my family think I likely have ADHD too. If you read my profile and you're on the spectrum it's probably pretty obvious that I am. The people I've got on best with on this site are people who also have autism, or who have some experience with it. I've noticed I get overwhelmed easily, so I struggle to keep up with multiple chats and I often lose interest quickly ( I know this makes me sound like a bitch ). The idea of meeting new people excites me and I get a thrill out of it, but I find it hard to commit to planning meets. There are other reasons I don't meet often. I have issues with my appearance and my autism makes me very unfiltered. I'll say I find myself disgusting and then put people off. Sometimes I do this on purpose if I think someone is too attractive for me. A lot of people on Fab are fed up of negative status updates. If I'm upset about something I can't seem to stop museof from posting about it. Do any other autistic people do this? I am very bubbly one on one or in groups of around three people, but the idea lf clubs scare me. I think I'd enjoy the experience, but social situations with lots of people make me want to shrink into a corner. Am I missing out by not going to any club nights? I don't get a lot of interest from couples and women and I feel like parties and clubs are the only way I can meet them." I think Purple Mamba has an event for neurodiverse people. Has anybody been to this event? I made a thread asking what it's like on threads and whether me being unpopular on here would affect my experience. I brought up my autism and someone from Purple Mamba told me about it. Unfortunately I don't drive and can't get many places by direct train. I don't have the money to spend on multiple trains, so I feel like it wouldn't be possible to get to this event. | |||
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"I strongly believe everyone on fab is neurodiverse, whether they know it or not Naa, I don't agree Some are just jizz beasts What if you're a ADHD jizz beast? That wasn't my point was it smart arse | |||
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"The first line of my profile mentions my AuDHD dopamine-seeking, so I've definitely been aware of it since I joined here. I need a bit of chat first too - just not small talk because that makes me throw up in my mouth a little. I suppose I *can* just meet up and get down to it, but I very much prefer to know the person a wee bit before the clothes come off. I feel like the knowing them a bit heightens the hit!" I always try to make a connection with the other person before I decide to meet. You're correct that can help many. | |||
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"Not really, I find guys categorically struggle with follow though I'm audhd and if I want to meet I want to meet Guys are the letdown " If I arrange a meet, I'll nearly always follow through because once the dopamine hits, my brain has already decided it's happening 😅. Sometimes that's great, sometimes it means I probably should have taken a bit longer to think things through. The planning stage is harder for me than actually turning up. | |||
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"Social side's my biggest challenge in the lifestyle with my Aspergers. Part of it because I'm with people who I don't know & struggle for confidence the longer I feel left alone. Whenever I go to a club (in my case, always Club Alchemy), I always make use of the pool table to be a icebreaker for socialising to start but it can be tough especially when not getting rub of the green (both the pool table & making a social connection) plus there's only so long you can keep there in a swingers club before someone asks why you're not joining in 😜 Also the reputation single guys have because of idiots who don't understand etiquette has made confidence in clubs a tricky challenge though I wisely limit myself on wandering around the club too much (or being on the "cock conveyor" as a number of experienced swingers call it) due to the way you can be easily misjudged for being too creepy/desperate. That way I can decide to call it a night & leave if ultimately I feel like I'm not adding to the night. In the case of the forums, do enjoy joining the topics that appeal to me or if I can contribute & have to say, am grateful that this forum topic has enabled me to open up both with my autism & general struggles within the lifestyle ❤️ the forums provide some of my dopamine hit (notably when there are perv threads set up for Saturday & Sunday 😉)" Your post has made me realise that a lot of how I behaved in vanilla clubs was probably ADHD-related. I'd never made that connection before. I always needed something to focus on and found random small talk hard work. Looking back, it makes a lot more sense now. | |||
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"Undiagnosised, but peer diagnososed by many people and even some people who work in mental health, bit nothing official, lol. The link between hypersexuality and adhd is well documented- hence the term 'neourospicy'. I think Fab is defo a dopamine chasers heaven...but just as equally hell if you suffer from RSD. As a side question to this topic: Does anyone else find it takes longer to climax than it "should" due to their condition?? " This has actually got me thinking! I was diagnosed with ADHD earlier this year, and I’ve always wondered if I have delayed orgasm, particularly with penetration and oral. I’m actually fine when masturbating and can orgasm without much trouble, but I do really enjoy edging and can take my time with it. With a partner, though, it can take me a lot longer to cum. I’d always assumed it was because I’m circumcised and maybe have less sensitivity, but reading this has made me wonder if ADHD could be part of it too, especially the dopamine/attention side of things. Anyone else with ADHD find they’re similar? | |||
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"Undiagnosised, but peer diagnososed by many people and even some people who work in mental health, bit nothing official, lol. The link between hypersexuality and adhd is well documented- hence the term 'neourospicy'. I think Fab is defo a dopamine chasers heaven...but just as equally hell if you suffer from RSD. As a side question to this topic: Does anyone else find it takes longer to climax than it "should" due to their condition?? This has actually got me thinking! I was diagnosed with ADHD earlier this year, and I’ve always wondered if I have delayed orgasm, particularly with penetration and oral. I’m actually fine when masturbating and can orgasm without much trouble, but I do really enjoy edging and can take my time with it. With a partner, though, it can take me a lot longer to cum. I’d always assumed it was because I’m circumcised and maybe have less sensitivity, but reading this has made me wonder if ADHD could be part of it too, especially the dopamine/attention side of things. Anyone else with ADHD find they’re similar?" When having actual sex 9 times out of 10 I’m in complete control of my orgasim and can pick and choose when I cum. I can choose to cum relatively quickly, or go on for hours and multiple sessions of sex before cumming really heavily. I almost always have total control over it and have never seen climax as my ultimate goal when having sex, unless the complete focus has been put on me and my orgasim. I’ve always thought of it as a skill and have often been told it’s not my partners normal experience of males and how they orgasim. Maybe it is condition related because may focus is never really me & always on my partner. | |||
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"Undiagnosised, but peer diagnososed by many people and even some people who work in mental health, bit nothing official, lol. The link between hypersexuality and adhd is well documented- hence the term 'neourospicy'. I think Fab is defo a dopamine chasers heaven...but just as equally hell if you suffer from RSD. As a side question to this topic: Does anyone else find it takes longer to climax than it "should" due to their condition?? This has actually got me thinking! I was diagnosed with ADHD earlier this year, and I’ve always wondered if I have delayed orgasm, particularly with penetration and oral. I’m actually fine when masturbating and can orgasm without much trouble, but I do really enjoy edging and can take my time with it. With a partner, though, it can take me a lot longer to cum. I’d always assumed it was because I’m circumcised and maybe have less sensitivity, but reading this has made me wonder if ADHD could be part of it too, especially the dopamine/attention side of things. Anyone else with ADHD find they’re similar? When having actual sex 9 times out of 10 I’m in complete control of my orgasim and can pick and choose when I cum. I can choose to cum relatively quickly, or go on for hours and multiple sessions of sex before cumming really heavily. I almost always have total control over it and have never seen climax as my ultimate goal when having sex, unless the complete focus has been put on me and my orgasim. I’ve always thought of it as a skill and have often been told it’s not my partners normal experience of males and how they orgasim. Maybe it is condition related because may focus is never really me & always on my partner. " Yes this is exactly what I’m saying ☝🏻 Out of interest are you circumcised and is it different for you with or without condoms or just the same thing ? | |||
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"Undiagnosised, but peer diagnososed by many people and even some people who work in mental health, bit nothing official, lol. The link between hypersexuality and adhd is well documented- hence the term 'neourospicy'. I think Fab is defo a dopamine chasers heaven...but just as equally hell if you suffer from RSD. As a side question to this topic: Does anyone else find it takes longer to climax than it "should" due to their condition?? This has actually got me thinking! I was diagnosed with ADHD earlier this year, and I’ve always wondered if I have delayed orgasm, particularly with penetration and oral. I’m actually fine when masturbating and can orgasm without much trouble, but I do really enjoy edging and can take my time with it. With a partner, though, it can take me a lot longer to cum. I’d always assumed it was because I’m circumcised and maybe have less sensitivity, but reading this has made me wonder if ADHD could be part of it too, especially the dopamine/attention side of things. Anyone else with ADHD find they’re similar? When having actual sex 9 times out of 10 I’m in complete control of my orgasim and can pick and choose when I cum. I can choose to cum relatively quickly, or go on for hours and multiple sessions of sex before cumming really heavily. I almost always have total control over it and have never seen climax as my ultimate goal when having sex, unless the complete focus has been put on me and my orgasim. I’ve always thought of it as a skill and have often been told it’s not my partners normal experience of males and how they orgasim. Maybe it is condition related because may focus is never really me & always on my partner. Yes this is exactly what I’m saying ☝🏻 Out of interest are you circumcised and is it different for you with or without condoms or just the same thing ?" I’m not cut so different to you in that sense. I haven’t cum whilst wearing a condom ever in my life. When playing with other people and not my partner I always wear protection but I could fuck for 24 hours in a condom and not cum, I’ll still love it but I’d never orgasim. In fact it’s very rare that I cum from whilst actually having sex its self. I need to be in a certain rhythm to cum, which mainly leads to pounding. The vast amount of time when I do this, the person I’m fucking will cum before me and have to stop and I have to start again lol | |||
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"Undiagnosised, but peer diagnososed by many people and even some people who work in mental health, bit nothing official, lol. The link between hypersexuality and adhd is well documented- hence the term 'neourospicy'. I think Fab is defo a dopamine chasers heaven...but just as equally hell if you suffer from RSD. As a side question to this topic: Does anyone else find it takes longer to climax than it "should" due to their condition?? This has actually got me thinking! I was diagnosed with ADHD earlier this year, and I’ve always wondered if I have delayed orgasm, particularly with penetration and oral. I’m actually fine when masturbating and can orgasm without much trouble, but I do really enjoy edging and can take my time with it. With a partner, though, it can take me a lot longer to cum. I’d always assumed it was because I’m circumcised and maybe have less sensitivity, but reading this has made me wonder if ADHD could be part of it too, especially the dopamine/attention side of things. Anyone else with ADHD find they’re similar? When having actual sex 9 times out of 10 I’m in complete control of my orgasim and can pick and choose when I cum. I can choose to cum relatively quickly, or go on for hours and multiple sessions of sex before cumming really heavily. I almost always have total control over it and have never seen climax as my ultimate goal when having sex, unless the complete focus has been put on me and my orgasim. I’ve always thought of it as a skill and have often been told it’s not my partners normal experience of males and how they orgasim. Maybe it is condition related because may focus is never really me & always on my partner. Yes this is exactly what I’m saying ☝🏻 Out of interest are you circumcised and is it different for you with or without condoms or just the same thing ? I’m not cut so different to you in that sense. I haven’t cum whilst wearing a condom ever in my life. When playing with other people and not my partner I always wear protection but I could fuck for 24 hours in a condom and not cum, I’ll still love it but I’d never orgasim. In fact it’s very rare that I cum from whilst actually having sex its self. I need to be in a certain rhythm to cum, which mainly leads to pounding. The vast amount of time when I do this, the person I’m fucking will cum before me and have to stop and I have to start again lol" Ok I fully get what you’re saying it’s all very similar to me. I’m aroused but just don’t ejaculate. However sometimes I’ve felt that I’ve cum but not ejaculated it’s what i call a dry orgasm | |||
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