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Mental and Sexual Wellbeing

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By *portyndNaughty OP   Man
over a year ago

Nearby Hinckley

Hello everyone,

It has been now over one year the COVID-19 pandemic hit the world.

As a single male I must confess it is becoming hard to cope, no real social interaction, club visits and obviously no intimacy.

Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded. However, sexually it has been a nightmare, specially for single men like myself who rellied so much in the club scene. Low libido, easily irritated and stressed. I am trying to cope by imersing into work and hobbies I have, such as playing drums. Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hello everyone,

It has been now over one year the COVID-19 pandemic hit the world.

As a single male I must confess it is becoming hard to cope, no real social interaction, club visits and obviously no intimacy.

Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded. However, sexually it has been a nightmare, specially for single men like myself who rellied so much in the club scene. Low libido, easily irritated and stressed. I am trying to cope by imersing into work and hobbies I have, such as playing drums. Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping? "

Ten months without sex?

No words

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How are you folks coping? "

Being a massive wanker

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you're experiencing low libido and are easily irritated then I don't think you're doing well mentally as you might say you are.

Remember, this may have been a part of your lifestyle but it's still just one part. You need to focus on other things such as health, hobbies, and friendship first.

If there's no reason to log into fab then don't. Take a break for a while

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By *.D.I.D.A.SMan
over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact

There are more important things in life. I miss it a great deal but it's not near the top of my list of what I miss most or would like to do once some kind of normality returns.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm lucky as i have a husband (who is also a swinger) so we aren't missing sex but we are really missing our swinging life, not just the sex with others but the club, friends, the social life with other swingers.

It must be a struggle for single people.

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By *portyndNaughty OP   Man
over a year ago

Nearby Hinckley


"Hello everyone,

It has been now over one year the COVID-19 pandemic hit the world.

As a single male I must confess it is becoming hard to cope, no real social interaction, club visits and obviously no intimacy.

Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded. However, sexually it has been a nightmare, specially for single men like myself who rellied so much in the club scene. Low libido, easily irritated and stressed. I am trying to cope by imersing into work and hobbies I have, such as playing drums. Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping?

Ten months without sex?

No words"

And counting

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By *portyndNaughty OP   Man
over a year ago

Nearby Hinckley


"If you're experiencing low libido and are easily irritated then I don't think you're doing well mentally as you might say you are.

Remember, this may have been a part of your lifestyle but it's still just one part. You need to focus on other things such as health, hobbies, and friendship first.

If there's no reason to log into fab then don't. Take a break for a while "

Cheers buddy good advice

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"There are more important things in life. I miss it a great deal but it's not near the top of my list of what I miss most or would like to do once some kind of normality returns. "

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By *oncupiscence73Woman
over a year ago

South

[Removed by poster at 26/01/21 11:55:50]

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By *incskittenWoman
over a year ago

Nottingham


"Hello everyone,

It has been now over one year the COVID-19 pandemic hit the world.

As a single male I must confess it is becoming hard to cope, no real social interaction, club visits and obviously no intimacy.

Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded. However, sexually it has been a nightmare, specially for single men like myself who rellied so much in the club scene. Low libido, easily irritated and stressed. I am trying to cope by imersing into work and hobbies I have, such as playing drums. Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping?

Ten months without sex?

No words

And counting

"

There is more to life than sex.

How about not seeing family for a year.

Losing loved ones to covid.

Struggling with your mental health.

Crying yourself to sleep because loneliness consumes you .

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By *oncupiscence73Woman
over a year ago

South


"There are more important things in life. I miss it a great deal but it's not near the top of my list of what I miss most or would like to do once some kind of normality returns.

"

Oh This ... seriously it’s just sex not really worth getting your knickers in a twist about. Ten months isn’t a long time in the scheme of things. Many people with small kids go far longer .....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe take a break from here? Its like me going into the cake shop everyday to look and remember what a doughnut tasted like....so I dont go into the cake shop anymore

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Lets be kind people, remember we don't have to miss the same things.

To the OP, if you have low libido, are easily irritated and stressed I would suggest it may be more than no sex that is the issue.

I think this last year has hit a lot of people in different ways, maybe try and distract yourself from the things you are missing, I know that can be easier said than done for certain things we miss, but it makes the day go easier if you try

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Lets be kind people, remember we don't have to miss the same things.

To the OP, if you have low libido, are easily irritated and stressed I would suggest it may be more than no sex that is the issue.

I think this last year has hit a lot of people in different ways, maybe try and distract yourself from the things you are missing, I know that can be easier said than done for certain things we miss, but it makes the day go easier if you try"

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town


"Hello everyone,

It has been now over one year the COVID-19 pandemic hit the world.

As a single male I must confess it is becoming hard to cope, no real social interaction, club visits and obviously no intimacy.

Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded. However, sexually it has been a nightmare, specially for single men like myself who rellied so much in the club scene. Low libido, easily irritated and stressed. I am trying to cope by imersing into work and hobbies I have, such as playing drums. Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping?

Ten months without sex?

No words

And counting

"

I feel for you. I'm largely in the same boat. Slightly different in that I have a support bubble gf but sex has fallen off a cliff there so it's not just lack of sex and intimacy that is frustrating.

It's like squeezing a balloon... You think one area of your life is OK and then it pops out the side. And as you try and get a grip of that another area pops out. It's very tough times for some. Be kind to yourself, drumming is an awesome way to spend time.. If you've not already done so have a look at Thomas lang and the clemburkedrummingproject.... And just for feelgood the nandi bushell ones which are very fun.

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By *portyndNaughty OP   Man
over a year ago

Nearby Hinckley


"Hello everyone,

It has been now over one year the COVID-19 pandemic hit the world.

As a single male I must confess it is becoming hard to cope, no real social interaction, club visits and obviously no intimacy.

Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded. However, sexually it has been a nightmare, specially for single men like myself who rellied so much in the club scene. Low libido, easily irritated and stressed. I am trying to cope by imersing into work and hobbies I have, such as playing drums. Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping?

Ten months without sex?

No words

And counting

There is more to life than sex.

How about not seeing family for a year.

Losing loved ones to covid.

Struggling with your mental health.

Crying yourself to sleep because loneliness consumes you .

"

You are absolutely correct. I have not seen my family since last December as they are expats in Portugal. Thanks for wise words.

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By *portyndNaughty OP   Man
over a year ago

Nearby Hinckley


"Hello everyone,

It has been now over one year the COVID-19 pandemic hit the world.

As a single male I must confess it is becoming hard to cope, no real social interaction, club visits and obviously no intimacy.

Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded. However, sexually it has been a nightmare, specially for single men like myself who rellied so much in the club scene. Low libido, easily irritated and stressed. I am trying to cope by imersing into work and hobbies I have, such as playing drums. Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping?

Ten months without sex?

No words

And counting

I feel for you. I'm largely in the same boat. Slightly different in that I have a support bubble gf but sex has fallen off a cliff there so it's not just lack of sex and intimacy that is frustrating.

It's like squeezing a balloon... You think one area of your life is OK and then it pops out the side. And as you try and get a grip of that another area pops out. It's very tough times for some. Be kind to yourself, drumming is an awesome way to spend time.. If you've not already done so have a look at Thomas lang and the clemburkedrummingproject.... And just for feelgood the nandi bushell ones which are very fun."

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By *ionelhutzMan
over a year ago

liverpool


"Lets be kind people, remember we don't have to miss the same things.

To the OP, if you have low libido, are easily irritated and stressed I would suggest it may be more than no sex that is the issue.

I think this last year has hit a lot of people in different ways, maybe try and distract yourself from the things you are missing, I know that can be easier said than done for certain things we miss, but it makes the day go easier if you try"

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West


"Hello everyone,

It has been now over one year the COVID-19 pandemic hit the world.

As a single male I must confess it is becoming hard to cope, no real social interaction, club visits and obviously no intimacy.

Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded. However, sexually it has been a nightmare, specially for single men like myself who rellied so much in the club scene. Low libido, easily irritated and stressed. I am trying to cope by imersing into work and hobbies I have, such as playing drums. Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping? "

Us single gals are in similar boats lol!

It’s absolutely fair for you to be missing it, not everyone misses the same things and missing one doesn’t reduce how much you miss something else

Clubs were a massive part of my social life, sex life and friendship group so I totally get where your coming from, it isn’t always just one part of your life

Hope your okay xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are more things to life than sex but if it's something you're accustomed to partaking in then it's a loss and loss has an impact regardless of what it's a loss of, no ground to be gained in belittling one person's perception of loss or comparing it to our own.

OP I hope you find other ways to deal with how you're feeling just now and take the positive advice that's been offered

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

I'm just grateful for my toys ! X

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By *portyndNaughty OP   Man
over a year ago

Nearby Hinckley


"Hello everyone,

It has been now over one year the COVID-19 pandemic hit the world.

As a single male I must confess it is becoming hard to cope, no real social interaction, club visits and obviously no intimacy.

Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded. However, sexually it has been a nightmare, specially for single men like myself who rellied so much in the club scene. Low libido, easily irritated and stressed. I am trying to cope by imersing into work and hobbies I have, such as playing drums. Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping?

Us single gals are in similar boats lol!

It’s absolutely fair for you to be missing it, not everyone misses the same things and missing one doesn’t reduce how much you miss something else

Clubs were a massive part of my social life, sex life and friendship group so I totally get where your coming from, it isn’t always just one part of your life

Hope your okay xx

"

Kind words

Xx

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By *irty PrettyWoman
over a year ago

Cardiff


"Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded."

Does that mean you think those who aren’t fine are weak-minded?


"Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping? "

I went without sex for 12 years. This is nothing.

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West


"Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded.

Does that mean you think those who aren’t fine are weak-minded?

Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping?

I went without sex for 12 years. This is nothing."

It’s nothing to you.

To some it’s a lot.

People deal with all things differently.

Be kind

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Lets be kind people, remember we don't have to miss the same things.

To the OP, if you have low libido, are easily irritated and stressed I would suggest it may be more than no sex that is the issue.

I think this last year has hit a lot of people in different ways, maybe try and distract yourself from the things you are missing, I know that can be easier said than done for certain things we miss, but it makes the day go easier if you try"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i can cope without the sex , but what i really miss is the things that often come along with sex be that from a relationship or friends with benefits scenario

companionship, the closeness and intimacy, human touch, oh my god i miss a cuddle, falling asleep and waking up beside someone, kisses, the comfort and relaxing effect of a wee hair stroke

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town

Its a great post op as it's caused me to think and reflect .. And being a bloke that doesn't come easy. For me, and I suspect for some other guys, sex and sexuality has always been my go to escape and feelgood time. It's perfectly natural, it's physical so you get the endorphin rush, it's socially connected so you get the oxytocin fix, you don't have to think particularly hard about it. It used to be perfectly legal... Bad day at work? Kids playing up? Car damaged? Argument or row? Bad news? Or...wonderful workout? Birthday treat? Sunny day? New boxer shorts? Finished papering the wall? .. Sex makes it all better. So removing it leaves a pretty big hole to fill (no pun intended) and there's only so much Netflix you can consume.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm just grateful for my toys ! X"

Im grateful for your toys as well lol

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By *irty PrettyWoman
over a year ago

Cardiff


"Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded.

Does that mean you think those who aren’t fine are weak-minded?

Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping?

I went without sex for 12 years. This is nothing.

It’s nothing to you.

To some it’s a lot.

People deal with all things differently.

Be kind "

He asked how people are coping. I said it was nothing. I thought it was obvious I meant “to me”. Though I do think people should get some perspective because 10 months without sex IS nothing compared to death, for example.

Besides, where was the kindness in OP’s implication that anyone who’s struggling menrally is weak-minded?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded.

Does that mean you think those who aren’t fine are weak-minded?

Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping?

I went without sex for 12 years. This is nothing.

It’s nothing to you.

To some it’s a lot.

People deal with all things differently.

Be kind

He asked how people are coping. I said it was nothing. I thought it was obvious I meant “to me”. Though I do think people should get some perspective because 10 months without sex IS nothing compared to death, for example.

Besides, where was the kindness in OP’s implication that anyone who’s struggling menrally is weak-minded?"

i think you’ve created that weak minded implication yourself... and why is the term weak minded even an insult?

if someone has a weak stomach, or a weak hip or weak sight it just means it can’t sustain as much as some others might and needs more care , its no different, interpreting that as unkind says more about your own thoughts on what mental health says about a person

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire


"Lets be kind people, remember we don't have to miss the same things.

To the OP, if you have low libido, are easily irritated and stressed I would suggest it may be more than no sex that is the issue.

I think this last year has hit a lot of people in different ways, maybe try and distract yourself from the things you are missing, I know that can be easier said than done for certain things we miss, but it makes the day go easier if you try"

This..

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By *osebud6688Woman
over a year ago

Northampton

Surely the perspective here should be that it is relative to the individual. It isn’t fair to say someone’s feelings are basically invalid because someone else might be in a worse situation.

OP - I’m in the same situation and very much struggling. It’s more than just the sex though as others have said - it’s the affection and everything else that goes with it. It’s tough and I very much sympathise. As I do with anyone who is struggling right now.

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West


"Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded.

Does that mean you think those who aren’t fine are weak-minded?

Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping?

I went without sex for 12 years. This is nothing.

It’s nothing to you.

To some it’s a lot.

People deal with all things differently.

Be kind

He asked how people are coping. I said it was nothing. I thought it was obvious I meant “to me”. Though I do think people should get some perspective because 10 months without sex IS nothing compared to death, for example.

Besides, where was the kindness in OP’s implication that anyone who’s struggling menrally is weak-minded?

i think you’ve created that weak minded implication yourself... and why is the term weak minded even an insult?

if someone has a weak stomach, or a weak hip or weak sight it just means it can’t sustain as much as some others might and needs more care , its no different, interpreting that as unkind says more about your own thoughts on what mental health says about a person "

This

Comparing people’s struggles- lack of sex to death doesn’t really achieve anything.

There’s always someone worse off, but it doesn’t invalidate anyone else’s feelings.

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town

Let's not forget either that when we are emotional troubled we don't always think as clearly as we would like. It's food to see the warmth and empathy in some of the responses. Text a friend... Why not?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded.

Does that mean you think those who aren’t fine are weak-minded?

Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping?

I went without sex for 12 years. This is nothing.

It’s nothing to you.

To some it’s a lot.

People deal with all things differently.

Be kind "

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By *ilver_StarMan
over a year ago

Warwickshire

The whole situation right now is stressful for us all, so don't beat yourself up over low libido (often stress related).

While almost everyone has said that there are 'more important things' than sex, there is a mental and emotional release that comes from sharing intimacy with another person, in a way that solo activity doesn't bring.

My advice would be to accept that its going to be a while until you can meet people, and fill your time with exercise, reading, learning etc. The community here is (usually) good at talking and being supportive - either just vanilla topics or more erotic discussions. Maybe you can talk/help others too.

We should all look after others if we can right!

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By *irty PrettyWoman
over a year ago

Cardiff


"Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded.

Does that mean you think those who aren’t fine are weak-minded?

Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping?

I went without sex for 12 years. This is nothing.

It’s nothing to you.

To some it’s a lot.

People deal with all things differently.

Be kind

He asked how people are coping. I said it was nothing. I thought it was obvious I meant “to me”. Though I do think people should get some perspective because 10 months without sex IS nothing compared to death, for example.

Besides, where was the kindness in OP’s implication that anyone who’s struggling menrally is weak-minded?

i think you’ve created that weak minded implication yourself... and why is the term weak minded even an insult?

if someone has a weak stomach, or a weak hip or weak sight it just means it can’t sustain as much as some others might and needs more care , its no different, interpreting that as unkind says more about your own thoughts on what mental health says about a person

This

Comparing people’s struggles- lack of sex to death doesn’t really achieve anything.

There’s always someone worse off, but it doesn’t invalidate anyone else’s feelings. "

It’s actually a very relevant comparison, because any one of us could die of Covid if we catch it. It isn’t just old or disabled people, any of us could die of it. So personally I’d rather go without sex than risk dying. You very obviously don’t feel that way.

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By *.D.I.D.A.SMan
over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact


"Hello everyone,

It has been now over one year the COVID-19 pandemic hit the world.

As a single male I must confess it is becoming hard to cope, no real social interaction, club visits and obviously no intimacy.

Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded. However, sexually it has been a nightmare, specially for single men like myself who rellied so much in the club scene. Low libido, easily irritated and stressed. I am trying to cope by imersing into work and hobbies I have, such as playing drums. Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping? "

I'm not trying to sound facetious, but on the one hand you say you're mentally fine, yet you admit to struggling to cope and it is driving you insane? I do sympathise though OP. I've had periods where I feel like I am trapped in a black hole. Keeping occupied, having daily goals and interacting even if it is just forums like what you are already doing is the best advice I can offer. If Fab or the news or something else is triggering you, perhaps take a step back from it?

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West

[Removed by poster at 26/01/21 14:08:29]

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town


"Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded.

Does that mean you think those who aren’t fine are weak-minded?

Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping?

I went without sex for 12 years. This is nothing.

It’s nothing to you.

To some it’s a lot.

People deal with all things differently.

Be kind

He asked how people are coping. I said it was nothing. I thought it was obvious I meant “to me”. Though I do think people should get some perspective because 10 months without sex IS nothing compared to death, for example.

Besides, where was the kindness in OP’s implication that anyone who’s struggling menrally is weak-minded?

i think you’ve created that weak minded implication yourself... and why is the term weak minded even an insult?

if someone has a weak stomach, or a weak hip or weak sight it just means it can’t sustain as much as some others might and needs more care , its no different, interpreting that as unkind says more about your own thoughts on what mental health says about a person

This

Comparing people’s struggles- lack of sex to death doesn’t really achieve anything.

There’s always someone worse off, but it doesn’t invalidate anyone else’s feelings.

It’s actually a very relevant comparison, because any one of us could die of Covid if we catch it. It isn’t just old or disabled people, any of us could die of it. So personally I’d rather go without sex than risk dying. You very obviously don’t feel that way."

Maybe I missed it but I'm not seeing where the op made it a binary choice.. Have sex or die. All he's said is what many of us feel, which is its hard to follow the rules for a year without consequences . And I very much empathise with that feeling. As someone who only last week lost family to it I know only too well the consequences of catching covid.

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West


"Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded.

Does that mean you think those who aren’t fine are weak-minded?

Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping?

I went without sex for 12 years. This is nothing.

It’s nothing to you.

To some it’s a lot.

People deal with all things differently.

Be kind

He asked how people are coping. I said it was nothing. I thought it was obvious I meant “to me”. Though I do think people should get some perspective because 10 months without sex IS nothing compared to death, for example.

Besides, where was the kindness in OP’s implication that anyone who’s struggling menrally is weak-minded?

i think you’ve created that weak minded implication yourself... and why is the term weak minded even an insult?

if someone has a weak stomach, or a weak hip or weak sight it just means it can’t sustain as much as some others might and needs more care , its no different, interpreting that as unkind says more about your own thoughts on what mental health says about a person

This

Comparing people’s struggles- lack of sex to death doesn’t really achieve anything.

There’s always someone worse off, but it doesn’t invalidate anyone else’s feelings.

It’s actually a very relevant comparison, because any one of us could die of Covid if we catch it. It isn’t just old or disabled people, any of us could die of it. So personally I’d rather go without sex than risk dying. You very obviously don’t feel that way.

Maybe I missed it but I'm not seeing where the op made it a binary choice.. Have sex or die. All he's said is what many of us feel, which is its hard to follow the rules for a year without consequences . And I very much empathise with that feeling. As someone who only last week lost family to it I know only too well the consequences of catching covid. "

Exactly!

Some people are just here for create arguments by presuming it seems. Very strange behaviour.

My first message very clearly said “single and similar boat” so not sure how I didn’t agree.

No where has anyone said they would rather die and have sex.

So my point very much still stands

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hello everyone,

It has been now over one year the COVID-19 pandemic hit the world.

As a single male I must confess it is becoming hard to cope, no real social interaction, club visits and obviously no intimacy.

Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded. However, sexually it has been a nightmare, specially for single men like myself who rellied so much in the club scene. Low libido, easily irritated and stressed. I am trying to cope by imersing into work and hobbies I have, such as playing drums. Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping? "

Mentally ok here, sex drive I cope with fairly easily as put the energy into other life things! But seriously missing intimacy ... after this is over think that will be more important to me than the purely sex side that is mainly fab to be honest! Equals going through a life change ... and loving it, makes the future have a little unknown element which makes it a little exciting

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By *luttyLaylaWoman
over a year ago

North West


"Hello everyone,

It has been now over one year the COVID-19 pandemic hit the world.

As a single male I must confess it is becoming hard to cope, no real social interaction, club visits and obviously no intimacy.

Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded. However, sexually it has been a nightmare, specially for single men like myself who rellied so much in the club scene. Low libido, easily irritated and stressed. I am trying to cope by imersing into work and hobbies I have, such as playing drums. Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping?

Mentally ok here, sex drive I cope with fairly easily as put the energy into other life things! But seriously missing intimacy ... after this is over think that will be more important to me than the purely sex side that is mainly fab to be honest! Equals going through a life change ... and loving it, makes the future have a little unknown element which makes it a little exciting "

Totally get that!

I’m definitely rethinking my “very happily single” mindset during lockdown. I’m usually super busy with other things and love it. But being on your own constantly definitely makes you miss intimacy and relationships! X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It isn't just sex tho is it? It's what goes along with it. Closeness, intimacy, feeling wanted, connection, emotional sustenance .... Its not 'just sex'

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By *essiCouple
over a year ago

suffolk


"It isn't just sex tho is it? It's what goes along with it. Closeness, intimacy, feeling wanted, connection, emotional sustenance .... Its not 'just sex'

"

Exactly this...

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By *portyndNaughty OP   Man
over a year ago

Nearby Hinckley


"Hello everyone,

It has been now over one year the COVID-19 pandemic hit the world.

As a single male I must confess it is becoming hard to cope, no real social interaction, club visits and obviously no intimacy.

Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded. However, sexually it has been a nightmare, specially for single men like myself who rellied so much in the club scene. Low libido, easily irritated and stressed. I am trying to cope by imersing into work and hobbies I have, such as playing drums. Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping?

Mentally ok here, sex drive I cope with fairly easily as put the energy into other life things! But seriously missing intimacy ... after this is over think that will be more important to me than the purely sex side that is mainly fab to be honest! Equals going through a life change ... and loving it, makes the future have a little unknown element which makes it a little exciting

Totally get that!

I’m definitely rethinking my “very happily single” mindset during lockdown. I’m usually super busy with other things and love it. But being on your own constantly definitely makes you miss intimacy and relationships! X"

Exactly. I have the same thought. Surely rethinking "happily single".

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By *portyndNaughty OP   Man
over a year ago

Nearby Hinckley


"It isn't just sex tho is it? It's what goes along with it. Closeness, intimacy, feeling wanted, connection, emotional sustenance .... Its not 'just sex'

"

Exactly

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By *racy_JacksWoman
over a year ago

Derby

It’s not just about sex for most people and as others have noted, just because there are others worse off, or others who are coping better with a particular aspect of the pandemic, this doesn’t mean that someone’s feelings are invalid

We tend to take touch for granted but it is important for health and decreases stress, anxiety and pain. So a lack of this might be particularly noticed by some people during a generally very stressful time

Occasionally when I’m low it feels like my skin is aching

Pets are amazing, if you one. They provide comfort and unlike toys, they are a living breathing being and there is reciprocity. Anything that will stimulate your skin will help- self massage, a hot bath.

Otherwise I keep myself busy and avoid looking at certain threads in the lounge forum that I know will be triggering. I have cuddled up to my platonic support bubble friend but it felt a bit weird

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo


"

It’s actually a very relevant comparison, because any one of us could die of Covid if we catch it. It isn’t just old or disabled people, any of us could die of it. So personally I’d rather go without sex than risk dying. You very obviously don’t feel that way."

Ok he didn't say he was not willing to go without sex just that he was missing it. This forum was made to help people through the virus and it has turned into an awful section most of the time, lets try and be supportive of someone who admits to struggling.

Back to the OP, if you can't do that please find another thread instead

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By * and R cple4Couple
over a year ago

swansea


"Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded.

Does that mean you think those who aren’t fine are weak-minded?

Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping?

I went without sex for 12 years. This is nothing.

It’s nothing to you.

To some it’s a lot.

People deal with all things differently.

Be kind

He asked how people are coping. I said it was nothing. I thought it was obvious I meant “to me”. Though I do think people should get some perspective because 10 months without sex IS nothing compared to death, for example.

Besides, where was the kindness in OP’s implication that anyone who’s struggling menrally is weak-minded?

i think you’ve created that weak minded implication yourself... and why is the term weak minded even an insult?

if someone has a weak stomach, or a weak hip or weak sight it just means it can’t sustain as much as some others might and needs more care , its no different, interpreting that as unkind says more about your own thoughts on what mental health says about a person

This

Comparing people’s struggles- lack of sex to death doesn’t really achieve anything.

There’s always someone worse off, but it doesn’t invalidate anyone else’s feelings.

It’s actually a very relevant comparison, because any one of us could die of Covid if we catch it. It isn’t just old or disabled people, any of us could die of it. So personally I’d rather go without sex than risk dying. You very obviously don’t feel that way.

Maybe I missed it but I'm not seeing where the op made it a binary choice.. Have sex or die. All he's said is what many of us feel, which is its hard to follow the rules for a year without consequences . And I very much empathise with that feeling. As someone who only last week lost family to it I know only too well the consequences of catching covid.

Exactly!

Some people are just here for create arguments by presuming it seems. Very strange behaviour.

My first message very clearly said “single and similar boat” so not sure how I didn’t agree.

No where has anyone said they would rather die and have sex.

So my point very much still stands "

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By * and R cple4Couple
over a year ago

swansea

I couldn’t imagine being on my own through all this and like others have said it’s not just the sex it’s the intimacy and closeness that goes with it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hello everyone,

It has been now over one year the COVID-19 pandemic hit the world.

As a single male I must confess it is becoming hard to cope, no real social interaction, club visits and obviously no intimacy.

Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded. However, sexually it has been a nightmare, specially for single men like myself who rellied so much in the club scene. Low libido, easily irritated and stressed. I am trying to cope by imersing into work and hobbies I have, such as playing drums. Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping?

Mentally ok here, sex drive I cope with fairly easily as put the energy into other life things! But seriously missing intimacy ... after this is over think that will be more important to me than the purely sex side that is mainly fab to be honest! Equals going through a life change ... and loving it, makes the future have a little unknown element which makes it a little exciting

Totally get that!

I’m definitely rethinking my “very happily single” mindset during lockdown. I’m usually super busy with other things and love it. But being on your own constantly definitely makes you miss intimacy and relationships! X

Exactly. I have the same thought. Surely rethinking "happily single". "

I've been very happily single for 28 years but youngest left home 4 months ago and this, coupled with covid isolation, has very much made me rethink life and what is important ... very much believe that it's closeness and intimacy that has become more important to me through all this! Whilst life is only on hold and the adventures will still happen at some point might be time to consider an adventure partner rather than purely sexual partners.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel the same, I miss them hugs and that warmth.

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By *.D.I.D.A.SMan
over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact

I wish I had bought myself a Teddy bear.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sex is important but more than this is the physical touch of another. Babies cannot survive without being touched. Why should anything be different now that we're adults! I will withhold any other comments or advise but if you'd like me to expound further please reply privately.

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By *arry monk40Man
over a year ago

Telford

It's destroyed all sexual interest and confidence a huge part of my life and personality are no more

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By *eedsmale36Man
over a year ago

Leeds


"Hello everyone,

It has been now over one year the COVID-19 pandemic hit the world.

As a single male I must confess it is becoming hard to cope, no real social interaction, club visits and obviously no intimacy.

Mentally I am fine as I always have been strong minded. However, sexually it has been a nightmare, specially for single men like myself who rellied so much in the club scene. Low libido, easily irritated and stressed. I am trying to cope by imersing into work and hobbies I have, such as playing drums. Nevertheless the 10 months of celibacy is driving me insane. How are you folks coping? "

I just bulk buy large boxes of tissues for the long lonely days

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