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Beating loneliness

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

For those like me who live alone, what have you done to keep yourself going nuts during lockdown?

I am single and live by myself. I live 5 hours away from family and work from home and have done since the first lockdown.

Whilst I do zoom with family and socialise virtually during online workouts and teams meeting for work. I have barely spent much time face to face with another person.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"For those like me who live alone, what have you done to keep yourself going nuts during lockdown?

I am single and live by myself. I live 5 hours away from family and work from home and have done since the first lockdown.

Whilst I do zoom with family and socialise virtually during online workouts and teams meeting for work. I have barely spent much time face to face with another person."

Have a "from"..... I think it's missing from the first line above....

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By *everHaveIEverWoman
over a year ago

.

So sorry to hear this

You’re a single adult household. Is there a reason you haven’t bubbled up with someone else?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"So sorry to hear this

You’re a single adult household. Is there a reason you haven’t bubbled up with someone else?

"

Most people have bubbled up with their own relatives.

So I moved far from my family nearly 18 moves ago for a job opportunity so where I am now I have friends, people I speak to but not really that close where they would choose to bubble up with me then let's say over a family member. Plus I'm well in to my thirties. A lot of my friends are family people with children who want to visit grandparents and such.

Whilst not in lockdown things were not too bad as I went back to the gym in group sessions or go for a run with a friend but, during lockdown it's a different story.

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By *uriousblondwifeCouple
over a year ago

wickford


"For those like me who live alone, what have you done to keep yourself going nuts during lockdown?

I am single and live by myself. I live 5 hours away from family and work from home and have done since the first lockdown.

Whilst I do zoom with family and socialise virtually during online workouts and teams meeting for work. I have barely spent much time face to face with another person.

Have a "from"..... I think it's missing from the first line above.... "
was that supposed to make people laugh!

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By * Sophie xTV/TS
over a year ago

Derby


"For those like me who live alone, what have you done to keep yourself going nuts during lockdown?

I am single and live by myself. I live 5 hours away from family and work from home and have done since the first lockdown.

Whilst I do zoom with family and socialise virtually during online workouts and teams meeting for work. I have barely spent much time face to face with another person.

Have a "from"..... I think it's missing from the first line above.... "

For this thread that was a little insensitive dont you think?

Anyway OP, a friend from work is in a similar situation to you as he moved over 150 miles for work and is also in his 30s etc.

He put himself on a few well known dating sites making his position very clearly that he was hoping to meet someone to bubble up with even platonically and it worked for him quite nicely indeed.

He would laugh to hear this but he is no oil painting and quite geeky with it.

His honesty won through and he is now bubbled up with a really good looking woman who is apparently lovely with it too so there is hope and possible options if you want to take a chance and try.

Best of luck as loneliness is a tough thing to deal with

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"For those like me who live alone, what have you done to keep yourself going nuts during lockdown?

I am single and live by myself. I live 5 hours away from family and work from home and have done since the first lockdown.

Whilst I do zoom with family and socialise virtually during online workouts and teams meeting for work. I have barely spent much time face to face with another person.

Have a "from"..... I think it's missing from the first line above.... was that supposed to make people laugh!"

That was unnecessary

Hi OP. I'm in similar position to you. Miles from family, recently made redundant too. Always happy to make new friends even if its just online.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So sorry to hear this

You’re a single adult household. Is there a reason you haven’t bubbled up with someone else?

Most people have bubbled up with their own relatives.

So I moved far from my family nearly 18 moves ago for a job opportunity so where I am now I have friends, people I speak to but not really that close where they would choose to bubble up with me then let's say over a family member. Plus I'm well in to my thirties. A lot of my friends are family people with children who want to visit grandparents and such.

Whilst not in lockdown things were not too bad as I went back to the gym in group sessions or go for a run with a friend but, during lockdown it's a different story."

Can you still not socially distance run with your friend?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"For those like me who live alone, what have you done to keep yourself going nuts during lockdown?

I am single and live by myself. I live 5 hours away from family and work from home and have done since the first lockdown.

Whilst I do zoom with family and socialise virtually during online workouts and teams meeting for work. I have barely spent much time face to face with another person."

I also live on my own and even for me who is not exactly a social butterfly have found it difficult. Perhaps you are doing as much as you can with your zoom meets. Also reaching out to people on here, beyond the odd careless remark there appear to be some pretty decent people on here. You are also keeping yourself fit too which is bound to make a difference to your well being. I have no real advice other than stick with it and things have to change at some point surely. Take some care

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By *nked_kittenWoman
over a year ago

Ankh Morpork

I’m beyond lonely for actual human company. I’m dreading going back on furlough.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Perhaps we are through the worst of it?

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By *r Nice Guy 1Man
over a year ago

manchester

Similar position here OP. However my occupation is classed as essential, albeit on reduced hours, at least I get some contact with the outside world. I intend to try to learn Spanish via YouTube on the time off that I get ... not sure how that will go but it’ll keep me occupied and hopefully make my trip to Spain later this year a little more interesting??

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By *limmatureguyMan
over a year ago

Tonbridge

Sign up with one of the food delivery companies such as Deliveroo, that will get you out and about meeting people.

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By *ionelhutzMan
over a year ago

liverpool


"Sign up with one of the food delivery companies such as Deliveroo, that will get you out and about meeting people."

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By *ionelhutzMan
over a year ago

liverpool


"For those like me who live alone, what have you done to keep yourself going nuts during lockdown?

I am single and live by myself. I live 5 hours away from family and work from home and have done since the first lockdown.

Whilst I do zoom with family and socialise virtually during online workouts and teams meeting for work. I have barely spent much time face to face with another person."

Hang in there

Hopefully there is some light at the end of the tunnel

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By *ove2pleaseseukMan
over a year ago

Hastings


"For those like me who live alone, what have you done to keep yourself going nuts during lockdown?

I am single and live by myself. I live 5 hours away from family and work from home and have done since the first lockdown.

Whilst I do zoom with family and socialise virtually during online workouts and teams meeting for work. I have barely spent much time face to face with another person."

Get out the house go on a good long walk fing you again and just getting out in the air I find helps

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By *ir-spunk-alotMan
over a year ago

Southern England

Stay strong guys, while i have no solutions, i just want to say there is some light at the end of the tunnel. I quite like the idea of the chap who suggested learning french, this would keep your mind occupied a bit.

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"For those like me who live alone, what have you done to keep yourself going nuts during lockdown?

I am single and live by myself. I live 5 hours away from family and work from home and have done since the first lockdown.

Whilst I do zoom with family and socialise virtually during online workouts and teams meeting for work. I have barely spent much time face to face with another person.

Have a "from"..... I think it's missing from the first line above.... "

Rude

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


"For those like me who live alone, what have you done to keep yourself going nuts during lockdown?

I am single and live by myself. I live 5 hours away from family and work from home and have done since the first lockdown.

Whilst I do zoom with family and socialise virtually during online workouts and teams meeting for work. I have barely spent much time face to face with another person.

Have a "from"..... I think it's missing from the first line above.... "

Very very unnecessary and insensitive!

OP this situation will get better at some point. I’m single and live alone too but I’m now an essential worker, however I worked from home for 7 weeks on lockdown 1, I tore my hair out.

Please PM me if you want to chat or let off steam.

Stay safe xxx

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Explore if there are any volunteering roles that you could do, that would be rewarding for you and others and where some contact with others would happen.

A few of us here do voluntary work and I find it great fun my spirit and all of the people who I know from it are wonderful. It may involve some training and some options won't be available during lockdown, though it's possible to find some options, in some places. There won't definitely be something that you'd fit into really well but it may offer a match. Even if not now, as we get out of the lockdown, there may be things that spark your interest. Volunteering doesn't have to be about pure altruism.

Hope some of the support and ideas help to lift you up

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By *uriousblondwifeCouple
over a year ago

wickford


"For those like me who live alone, what have you done to keep yourself going nuts during lockdown?

I am single and live by myself. I live 5 hours away from family and work from home and have done since the first lockdown.

Whilst I do zoom with family and socialise virtually during online workouts and teams meeting for work. I have barely spent much time face to face with another person.

Have a "from"..... I think it's missing from the first line above.... "

A mark of the man

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

I make sure I go out for a walk every day and there is always someone I meet who wants a quick chat.

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

Crikey can't even imagine how crap it must be.

We are pulling our hair out and there's two of us and both still working.

So being alone away from family and working at home must feel very lonely.

But people are out there and even just coming on forum posting any old nonsense ( it's what I do )

Might just help a tiny bit.

What about a DIY project to help pass the time?

Another tiny distraction.

As said going for a walk rather than a run you tend to take more time to notice things around you than running.

Another tiny distraction.

What about getting an allotment??

Buy and old cheap car and restore it or motorbike.

Even the act of ordering part's will mean more deliveries and a few brief moments of interaction.

Another tiny distraction.

Learn to paint?

Learn a musical instrument?

Learn a new language?

I know that all of these won't give you the personal tactical interaction that you crave but may help to distract you a tiny bit more.

All those tiny bits add up.

Sorry that we can't offer more help.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"For those like me who live alone, what have you done to keep yourself going nuts during lockdown?

I am single and live by myself. I live 5 hours away from family and work from home and have done since the first lockdown.

Whilst I do zoom with family and socialise virtually during online workouts and teams meeting for work. I have barely spent much time face to face with another person.

Have a "from"..... I think it's missing from the first line above....

For this thread that was a little insensitive dont you think?

Anyway OP, a friend from work is in a similar situation to you as he moved over 150 miles for work and is also in his 30s etc.

He put himself on a few well known dating sites making his position very clearly that he was hoping to meet someone to bubble up with even platonically and it worked for him quite nicely indeed.

He would laugh to hear this but he is no oil painting and quite geeky with it.

His honesty won through and he is now bubbled up with a really good looking woman who is apparently lovely with it too so there is hope and possible options if you want to take a chance and try.

Best of luck as loneliness is a tough thing to deal with "
.

That is a lovely story. I am happy for your friend.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Crikey can't even imagine how crap it must be.

We are pulling our hair out and there's two of us and both still working.

So being alone away from family and working at home must feel very lonely.

But people are out there and even just coming on forum posting any old nonsense ( it's what I do )

Might just help a tiny bit.

What about a DIY project to help pass the time?

Another tiny distraction.

As said going for a walk rather than a run you tend to take more time to notice things around you than running.

Another tiny distraction.

What about getting an allotment??

Buy and old cheap car and restore it or motorbike.

Even the act of ordering part's will mean more deliveries and a few brief moments of interaction.

Another tiny distraction.

Learn to paint?

Learn a musical instrument?

Learn a new language?

I know that all of these won't give you the personal tactical interaction that you crave but may help to distract you a tiny bit more.

All those tiny bits add up.

Sorry that we can't offer more help."

Thank you. You are right it's about tiny distractions. I did buy a Haynes manual for my motorbike and started tinkering. I was fucking petrified it wouldn't start at some point though.

I have also started listening to classical music as it it's very emotive and can change my mood very quickly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is always a freind at the bottom of a bottle if that fails advertise for a bubble freind on every type of social media thing you have there will be some one local to you in the same situation that just wants some one to watch tv with and eat tea together

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm sorry for all of those that are feeling lonely at the moment and this such an awful situation.

There have been some useful suggestions on here already that might be worth a try, I would also suggest having a look at the mind website because they have some really useful suggestions and tips and also helplines and websites.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m beyond lonely for actual human company. I’m dreading going back on furlough. "

Have you got any neighbours you could chat to? A lot of mine were having street 'parties' in the summer. Sat outside their houses chatting, all well over 2m apart.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I make sure I go out for a walk every day and there is always someone I meet who wants a quick chat. "

The locals are mostly friendly here. They smile and say thank you when I step off the kerb to keep distance. Even such small social interaction is nice.

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By *racy_JacksWoman
over a year ago

Derby

If you can still go for a run/walk with your friend, or go for walks with the other people you mentioned then obviously this will help. At the moment anyway you don’t need to be in a bubble to exercise outside

And dating apps, even if you don’t find someone on there to form a bubble with, you may be able to meet one or two local people for a walk

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If you can still go for a run/walk with your friend, or go for walks with the other people you mentioned then obviously this will help. At the moment anyway you don’t need to be in a bubble to exercise outside

And dating apps, even if you don’t find someone on there to form a bubble with, you may be able to meet one or two local people for a walk "

This is true but it is only one person you can meet from another household outside unless they are part of your bubble.

I do think it's a good idea though to try go for socially distance walks with another person if possible.

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By *oggoneMan
over a year ago

Derry

Get a pet. Cat,dog, bird, rodent or fish. Your choice, I would recommend a dog but whatever works for you.

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By *racy_JacksWoman
over a year ago

Derby


"If you can still go for a run/walk with your friend, or go for walks with the other people you mentioned then obviously this will help. At the moment anyway you don’t need to be in a bubble to exercise outside

And dating apps, even if you don’t find someone on there to form a bubble with, you may be able to meet one or two local people for a walk

This is true but it is only one person you can meet from another household outside unless they are part of your bubble.

I do think it's a good idea though to try go for socially distance walks with another person if possible."

I didn’t mean symultaneously seeing as very few people use apps to arrange to meet multiple people at the same time (common on Fab, to be fair. But this isn’t your typical site) I’d have thought that was pretty obvious

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By *stbury DavenportMan
over a year ago

Nottingham

Just want to post in solidarity with the OP. I'm single, live by myself, and have been alone for 315 days and counting. Fully expcting to clock up more than a year at this point.

To keep myself occupied: I correspond with my friends, read, write, listen to music and podcasts, and try to exercise a wee bit in the limited space available. I make plans with people for when it's safe again.

I'm lucky in that I'm a pretty solitary person by nature. Hard to imagine what this must be doing to more gregarious people.

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

I am fine as work full time mights, care for my mum plus walk my dogs 3x daily. Today i went down to the country park which is on my doorstep. There i saw 5 ladies in their 60's picking up litter. They had clamps and bin bags with them. We got talking and they explained how fed up they had been during lockdown as all live alone. They came up with the idea of picking up litter down the park. This way they could still chat whilst 2m apart, get their exercise and do a good turn for the community. How wonderful was that?. Just something so simple has solved their problems. They even had flasks of tea with them. They meet up 4x a week.

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

What an excellent thing to do

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish


"What an excellent thing to do"

Indeed. I was very touched by their story. Good on them.x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There is always a freind at the bottom of a bottle if that fails advertise for a bubble freind on every type of social media thing you have there will be some one local to you in the same situation that just wants some one to watch tv with and eat tea together "

I wouldnt recommend hitting the booze, thats the last thing you'd want to do to combat loneliness

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By *ightmyfireMan
over a year ago

beccles

In some ways I am really really lucky I have a wife and 2 kids. And parents that live over road who we can see in garden. I still feel incredibly lonely. Especially during all this. Life is tough as it's just work and looking after kids half the week..I feel guilty for feeling like it as I'm so much better off than others

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I am fine as work full time mights, care for my mum plus walk my dogs 3x daily. Today i went down to the country park which is on my doorstep. There i saw 5 ladies in their 60's picking up litter. They had clamps and bin bags with them. We got talking and they explained how fed up they had been during lockdown as all live alone. They came up with the idea of picking up litter down the park. This way they could still chat whilst 2m apart, get their exercise and do a good turn for the community. How wonderful was that?. Just something so simple has solved their problems. They even had flasks of tea with them. They meet up 4x a week. "
hope if anyone informed them there only allowed to meet one other person from anougher house hold for exercise which doesnt they hit them with there picking stick lol.

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

Me too OP, it is very difficult and no one with another person in their house can understand.

I did bubble with a friend but she's barely got any free time.

I started an even class at college so see people on Teams, but more importantly it's a new hobby I have thrown myself into.

Get fresh air and try to enjoy life one moment at a time.

Or login here, which is why I'm here tonight

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham


"In some ways I am really really lucky I have a wife and 2 kids. And parents that live over road who we can see in garden. I still feel incredibly lonely. Especially during all this. Life is tough as it's just work and looking after kids half the week..I feel guilty for feeling like it as I'm so much better off than others"

We all feel everything that affects us, that is natural. If one stopped to consider what other people have to deal with, anywhere in the world and without Covid even, we would die of guilt.

Try and thank your lucky stars. And if you do feel guilty remind yourself it is just a feeling about something you have no control over anyway

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham


"I am fine as work full time mights, care for my mum plus walk my dogs 3x daily. Today i went down to the country park which is on my doorstep. There i saw 5 ladies in their 60's picking up litter. They had clamps and bin bags with them. We got talking and they explained how fed up they had been during lockdown as all live alone. They came up with the idea of picking up litter down the park. This way they could still chat whilst 2m apart, get their exercise and do a good turn for the community. How wonderful was that?. Just something so simple has solved their problems. They even had flasks of tea with them. They meet up 4x a week. "

That's lovely

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


" hit them with there picking stick"

Is that a cover of an Ian Dury song?

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By *uiet LightMan
over a year ago

Hove


" Anyway OP, a friend from work is in a similar situation to you as he moved over 150 miles for work and is also in his 30s etc.

He put himself on a few well known dating sites making his position very clearly that he was hoping to meet someone to bubble up with even platonically and it worked for him quite nicely indeed.

He would laugh to hear this but he is no oil painting and quite geeky with it.

His honesty won through and he is now bubbled up with a really good looking woman who is apparently lovely with it too so there is hope and possible options if you want to take a chance and try.

Best of luck as loneliness is a tough thing to deal with "

Thank you for posting this, it's always good to hear of positive things coming from this situation.

Thank you to the OP also for posting. I'm in a very similar situation and I'm dreading the isolated months ahead. I thought I was doing ok in life before the lockdowns, but I've found the lack of little chats and everyday interactions to really have had an accumulative affect through the year.

I can see it from the other point of view though, people in a house with partners/housemates/kids that would just love a bit of space.

Thanks to everyone that posted tips and advice, some really good ideas here! Hope everyone is doing ok, the brighter evenings are on the way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m in the same boat, but I work full time but rarely see anyone to chat too , been on my own for 15 years now , normally I’m ok with it but lockdown is really killing me , nothing to do , and no where to go , I used to catch the national express and go somewhere new most weekends. Holidays abroad seem like a big no no , no gyms open , can’t go visit my parents there both dead and even there graves are out of bounds as too far to travel , I can’t see an end to this , every day is like ground hog day

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i love the raw honesty and supportiveness of this thread

we will come out the other end one day at a time

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By *ightmyfireMan
over a year ago

beccles


" Anyway OP, a friend from work is in a similar situation to you as he moved over 150 miles for work and is also in his 30s etc.

He put himself on a few well known dating sites making his position very clearly that he was hoping to meet someone to bubble up with even platonically and it worked for him quite nicely indeed.

He would laugh to hear this but he is no oil painting and quite geeky with it.

His honesty won through and he is now bubbled up with a really good looking woman who is apparently lovely with it too so there is hope and possible options if you want to take a chance and try.

Best of luck as loneliness is a tough thing to deal with

Thank you for posting this, it's always good to hear of positive things coming from this situation.

Thank you to the OP also for posting. I'm in a very similar situation and I'm dreading the isolated months ahead. I thought I was doing ok in life before the lockdowns, but I've found the lack of little chats and everyday interactions to really have had an accumulative affect through the year.

I can see it from the other point of view though, people in a house with partners/housemates/kids that would just love a bit of space.

Thanks to everyone that posted tips and advice, some really good ideas here! Hope everyone is doing ok, the brighter evenings are on the way "

That's a really nice response

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi I am a gregarious single person and live alone.I lost my main job and 3 others went on hold.How did I cope?!I have 3 bikes and made myself "bikefit"-I have ridden a bike every day since the first lockdown day.That was in the afternoon.In the morning I sat out in the garden read/crosswords/quizzes and created a wildlife garden.7 months out of work and my mobile started to ring.I distribute a local magazine(its free) and leaflets,flyers.The takeaway places need local help-ask them if they need leaflet/flyers distributors.I also do voluntary work.Also fabswingers I made some contacts

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By *ightmyfireMan
over a year ago

beccles


"In some ways I am really really lucky I have a wife and 2 kids. And parents that live over road who we can see in garden. I still feel incredibly lonely. Especially during all this. Life is tough as it's just work and looking after kids half the week..I feel guilty for feeling like it as I'm so much better off than others

We all feel everything that affects us, that is natural. If one stopped to consider what other people have to deal with, anywhere in the world and without Covid even, we would die of guilt.

Try and thank your lucky stars. And if you do feel guilty remind yourself it is just a feeling about something you have no control over anyway "

Thankyou

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By *ove3funCouple
over a year ago

Cheltenham

Don't know x

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By *iguy for funMan
over a year ago

CIRENCESTER


"

Hi OP. I'm in similar position to you. Miles from family, recently made redundant too. Always happy to make new friends even if its just online.

"

as the others have said it's hard/difficult/weird and it's things to hold onto of some description. i'm the same but been going into the office since june following 3 months of working from home, ok few people around but got to speak to some - security guard on door of waitrose know calls me bruv! however might soon become redundant (10% to be made redundant over next 2 months) so that could change dynamics big time - money wise be ok for a while as been there fora hundred years, but it's not like you can travel for three months and regroup

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By *eggo3Man
over a year ago

denton

Hi folks, some great posts on this subject which I struggle at times to deal with. My nearest family are 5 hours away and I look and see all couples and think why can't that be me. I am working full time from home and I do yoga every morning which I find helps. I will try some of the suggestions on here. I also bought a Stay Positive book for £4 and it really does have some great quotes.

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