FabSwingers.com forum: Domestic violence ??

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Just watched BBC documentary on domestic violence.

I CANNOT BELIEVE GOVERNMENT DIDN'T CONSIDER DOMESTIC ABUSE BEFORE ANNOUNCING LOCKDOWN.

some people are monsters..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What were they supposed to do then?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What were they supposed to do then?"

New Zealand recently passed a law to address exactly that.. you’d get 2 weeks paid time off, to leave the abuser, find new house, schools for kids etc..

Definitely things they could do to help, but the simple fact is there is no political will for it. Torie policy makers never have, nor will care about vulnerable people. Fucking sucks.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *irty desireWoman
over a year ago

newcatle

Leaving an abuser isn’t that easy!!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hear you, especially when it comes to the more emotional side of abusive relationships.. it’s definitely a hard one and there’s no single fix all solution to it..

I think that the kiwis took a pretty big step towards making this easier. Especially given that companies are now obliged to provide you that two weeks.. hopefully it makes its way to the rest of the world??

Close family of mine are married to abusive husbands, so I fully understand the difficulty of taking that step To leave.. so many pressures..

Shit sucks

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 19/08/20 18:17:52]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What were they supposed to do then?

New Zealand recently passed a law to address exactly that.. you’d get 2 weeks paid time off, to leave the abuser, find new house, schools for kids etc..

Definitely things they could do to help, but the simple fact is there is no political will for it. Torie policy makers never have, nor will care about vulnerable people. Fucking sucks. "

A whole 2 weeks

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" A whole 2 weeks

Well. In the Uk now. We have None.

2 weeks paid leave Is fart better than Nothing.

Plus the psychological impact of knowing that your abuse is being recognised, and help is being provided, that they are not alone That if they leave their abuser is far more important.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" A whole 2 weeks

Well. In the Uk now. We have None.

2 weeks paid leave Is fart better than Nothing.

Plus the psychological impact of knowing that your abuse is being recognised, and help is being provided, that they are not alone That if they leave their abuser is far more important."

We have domestic violence protection orders which courts can put in place for 28 days. In essence they can ban abusers from the address, prevent contact,and prevent proceedings for the abuser to have the victim evicted from the address. Not perfect, but something at least

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" A whole 2 weeks

Well. In the Uk now. We have None.

2 weeks paid leave Is fart better than Nothing.

Plus the psychological impact of knowing that your abuse is being recognised, and help is being provided, that they are not alone That if they leave their abuser is far more important."

A lot of woman that have abusive partners are not allowed to work by the abusive partner.

So 2 weeks paid leave wouldn't mean a thing .

But even if she did work and has been controlled by him for years

How Is she supposed to do all the things you said in your first post in 2 weeks ?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *moothman2000Man
over a year ago

Leicestershire

"Leaving an abuser isn’t that easy!!!"

^ This.

It doesn't matter what support mechanisms you put in place, the abused needs to be able to recognise what is happening to them and take that rather scary first step.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" A whole 2 weeks

Well. In the Uk now. We have None.

2 weeks paid leave Is fart better than Nothing.

Plus the psychological impact of knowing that your abuse is being recognised, and help is being provided, that they are not alone That if they leave their abuser is far more important.

A lot of woman that have abusive partners are not allowed to work by the abusive partner.

So 2 weeks paid leave wouldn't mean a thing .

But even if she did work and has been controlled by him for years

How Is she supposed to do all the things you said in your first post in 2 weeks ?

Again, it’s one step in the right direction, on a road that I suspect will never end. seeing as New Zealand is the first country to ever introduce anything like this, it’s pretty great. You don’t have to tell me how inadequate the support systems at the moment are. I know full well. But without question. It’s a big step. No other country apart from New Zealand offers this right.

I’m sure that it is one of many policies that their government will come out with to address domestic violence. But as a first step. It’s got to be acknowledged and welcomed, and talked about so it gains momentum and a wider field of discussion. And it has to be recognised for the Protections it does offer.

I totally get you though, it’s simply the tip of the iceberg when it comes to abuse, and I don’t claim it is a catch all fix.. just one Big step in the right direction.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ancs_tgirl_38TV/TS
over a year ago

Blackpool

Wear a mask

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What were they supposed to do then?

New Zealand recently passed a law to address exactly that.. you’d get 2 weeks paid time off, to leave the abuser, find new house, schools for kids etc..

Definitely things they could do to help, but the simple fact is there is no political will for it. Torie policy makers never have, nor will care about vulnerable people. Fucking sucks. "

this sounds nice in theory but a move like that takes more than 2 weeks, it also takes the mental strength to be ready to walk away and to want to share that information with your work place which while there is no shame in being a victim of abuse , its likely they will still at that point feel some shame towards it

i know new zealand are seen as world leading in many things but i think this is just lip service that looks good in a headline tbh

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

DV is in the news more and this is making people more aware, which is a good thing.

I read an article giving an example where a manager knew his employee was trapped working from home with an abusive partner. He knew he couldn't mention this on an work emails etc as her abuser may intercept the messages and attack her.

He insisted she come into the office one day to 'update her personnel details'. It got her out of the house and he was able to help her.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"What were they supposed to do then?"

I dont know what to say to this..

unfortunately people who are stuck in this vicious circle. they are more likely to be helpless..

However, in our society people have tendency to turn blind eye to stuff like this more often then not..

I personally feel speaking out of issues like this is very important..

(I apologise my English is not good.. )

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *om girlCouple (FF)
over a year ago

South Yorkshire

It’s so sad that this abuse still continues

And women and men need speak out

To many die in hands of the abuser

I just hope and prey the abuser gets some of his own treatment

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread