FabSwingers.com forum: Visiting family

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So I still live with my parents. It's my mum's birthday tomorrow and my sister needs to borrow something so she wants to kill two birds with one stone by coming over with my nephew to pick it up while also surprising my mum for her birthday. I've agreed to keep it a surprise and obviously we are going to follow social distancing rules; she will sit in the garden with my nephew and we will open the patio doors and sit in the living room and we will all eat cake (somewhat) together. Obviously this is better than nothing but I know it's going to kill me not being able to play with the little one as we are very close. I'm also worried my mum will get emotional being so near her daughter and grandchild on her birthday and not being able to give them a kiss and a cuddle

I have been out a grand total of 3 times for essentials since lockdown started (I do all the shopping as I don't want to risk my parents getting it). Each time I:

- Wear a heavy duty fabric face mask which covers from the top of my nose to the bottom of my chin

- Wear latex gloves which I remove before I get back into my car and throw them away

- Wash my hands with sanitiser as soon as I get back to my car

- Wipe down anything I've bought with antibac wipes, transfer the items to clean carrier bags and throw the bag from the shop away

- Wipe my car door handles and keys

- Wash my hands as soon as I get in, put my clothes straight in the wash and wipe down any door handles/light switches I touched on the way in

After all that I'm pretty sure my chances of contracting the virus are practically 0. I know that my sister takes similar precautions - in fact, she avoids going to the shops at all.

So my question is: if kids of divorced parents are allowed to be shuttled back and forth, why are we not able to see family members who a) haven't been displaying symptoms and b) we know are taking necessary precautions? I totally understand not being able to go down the pub with your mates or sunbathing in the park next to strangers but when it comes to immediate family who also aren't going to come into contact with strangers, you should be allowed to see them no?

TLDR - should we be able to visit family members who haven't been displaying symptoms?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 09/04/20 07:09:28]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why risk it ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have not seen my children or grandchildren ..... since all this started ... missed Mother’s Day and now Easter .... face time .... no meeting !!!!!

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By *sianMancMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"So I still live with my parents. It's my mum's birthday tomorrow and my sister needs to borrow something so she wants to kill two birds with one stone by coming over with my nephew to pick it up while also surprising my mum for her birthday. I've agreed to keep it a surprise and obviously we are going to follow social distancing rules; she will sit in the garden with my nephew and we will open the patio doors and sit in the living room and we will all eat cake (somewhat) together. Obviously this is better than nothing but I know it's going to kill me not being able to play with the little one as we are very close. I'm also worried my mum will get emotional being so near her daughter and grandchild on her birthday and not being able to give them a kiss and a cuddle

I have been out a grand total of 3 times for essentials since lockdown started (I do all the shopping as I don't want to risk my parents getting it). Each time I:

- Wear a heavy duty fabric face mask which covers from the top of my nose to the bottom of my chin

- Wear latex gloves which I remove before I get back into my car and throw them away

- Wash my hands with sanitiser as soon as I get back to my car

- Wipe down anything I've bought with antibac wipes, transfer the items to clean carrier bags and throw the bag from the shop away

- Wipe my car door handles and keys

- Wash my hands as soon as I get in, put my clothes straight in the wash and wipe down any door handles/light switches I touched on the way in

After all that I'm pretty sure my chances of contracting the virus are practically 0. I know that my sister takes similar precautions - in fact, she avoids going to the shops at all.

TLDR - should we be able to visit family members who haven't been displaying symptoms? "

Not showing symptoms doesnt mean you dont have it it means you could be asymptomatic.

Why risk it as poster above said.

1 wrong decision could be fatal.

After all the effort you've been taking dont slow down now.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Did anyone read the article yesterday where they had shown an image with how the particles can be in the air ? It showed if you were in a supermarket aisle and someone coughed in the NEXT aisle the particles could float in the air and reach you. I’m guilty of leaving the house plenty during lockdown as I’m now shopping for a large number of elderly people including two sets of parents and people on my street who can’t leave the house. But seeing that image concerned me slightly. It’s just so easy to catch it they are saying

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

To be clear - I am not risking anything. We are 100% going to stay at least two meters apart and they will only be here a short while. They are NOT coming inside the house. It's not even my decision to make as my parents are super virus-militant and will definitely not allow it.

My question was SHOULD we be allowed to visit each other? The government guidance on kids of divorce is that they are allowed to move between households so I don't see what the difference is with regards to family members.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're ignoring the guidelines. Its down to you to justify that not us.

For what it's worth my opinion is you shouldn't be doing that

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By *sianMancMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"To be clear - I am not risking anything. We are 100% going to stay at least two meters apart and they will only be here a short while. They are NOT coming inside the house. It's not even my decision to make as my parents are super virus-militant and will definitely not allow it.

Shoulda woulda coulda.

At the end of the day they say 2m well another report days more than 6m.

They say 14 days isolation another day 21 and I've read 24 and 48days too.

They said no face masks and now they say would be prudent since virus lingers in the air.

I can go on n on

Point is be safe and dont take chances.

Period!

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By *adetMan
over a year ago

South of Ipswich

Why do you and your family think the rules don't apply to you?

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By *sianMancMan
over a year ago

Manchester

Shoulda woulda coulda.

At the end of the day they say 2m well another report days more than 6m.

They say 14 days isolation another day 21 and I've read 24 and 48days too.

They said no face masks and now they say would be prudent since virus lingers in the air.

I can go on n on

Point is be safe and dont take chances.

Period!"

Say* not day...typos

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By *essie.Woman
over a year ago

Serendipity

I know a lot of split parents who have kept their children at just one household. It’s driving me mad not seeing my sister or my Nan properly and I’ve been self isolating as I’m classed as vulnerable. I’m not risking it for them or me though. If we stick to the rules, it’ll be over quicker.,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The difference is co-parenting and the welfare of the child.

Your sister doesn't need to see your parents as much as she wants to

People like you who bend the rules much like people who think it's okay to go to the park and sunbathe or have a barbecue because they dont exercise and it's almost the same thing are the reason a much stricter lockdown is likely

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also "borrow some things" does not equate to essential travel.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh and if you think visiting people displaying no symptoms is okay. Look up the meaning of asymptomatic.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Okay I'm sorry for asking the question... I will tell her to cancel.

Just FYI there are ways for some of you to express your opinions without making me feel like crap. I was just trying to do a nice thing while also following social distancing rules - the distance from my living room to patio is well above 2m and much safer than even asking your delivery driver to wait at the end of the driveway but if the neighbours see they will probably be as quick to judge as some of you lot

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By *imes_berksMan
over a year ago

Bracknell

"Did anyone read the article yesterday where they had shown an image with how the particles can be in the air ? It showed if you were in a supermarket aisle and someone coughed in the NEXT aisle the particles could float in the air and reach you. I’m guilty of leaving the house plenty during lockdown as I’m now shopping for a large number of elderly people including two sets of parents and people on my street who can’t leave the house. But seeing that image concerned me slightly. It’s just so easy to catch it they are saying "

That modelled video image was on the BBC news last night. Remember that is only one predicted model and not all models show the same spread. That was most probably the worst case model as well - the highest force that droplets could come out of a mouth upon coughing and with the person not covering their mouth on coughing.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Also "borrow some things" does not equate to essential travel."

It does if the item in question will help keep her household clean. Safer than going to a shop or getting it delivered as I will ensure it is 100% wiped down and cleaned and she will pick it up without any contact.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Okay I'm sorry for asking the question... I will tell her to cancel.

But you weren't following social distancing rules?

Amd I'm sorry if you think I'm judgemental as I said very early on if you want to break the rules do so, just don't seek validation from people telling you its okay to do so when it clearly isn't.

Anyway I'm off to work now. Key worker, in the middle of this shitstorm. Possibly a little sensitive to people who think they can bend the rules

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Also "borrow some things" does not equate to essential travel.

You're only going to dig a deeper hole for yourself now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally I don't see a problem as long as your 2 meters apart, not somthing I would do but I can see why people would.

Sadly my boy would struggle seeing nanna and grumpy and not giving them a cuddles and kisses as he's to young to understand so we are staying away.

On another note my little boy still goes between me and my ex. He's a character and would say I'm keeping his child away from him and would refuses to pay child support because I'm choosing to keep him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Also "borrow some things" does not equate to essential travel.

And it's just a coincidence that it's on your mother's birthday and your sister will bring the kids that she has to collect it.

If its that essential I'm sure she could pull up outside you could put it in the boot of her car and she could go home and in a few days when any risk of contamination from the surface your sister could get it out of her car.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Okay I'm sorry for asking the question... I will tell her to cancel.

But you weren't following social distancing rules?

Amd I'm sorry if you think I'm judgemental as I said very early on if you want to break the rules do so, just don't seek validation from people telling you its okay to do so when it clearly isn't.

Anyway I'm off to work now. Key worker, in the middle of this shitstorm. Possibly a little sensitive to people who think they can bend the rules

I was asking people's opinion on the existing rules and I sure as hell got my answer. In any case I have told her to just knock and say happy birthday through the window

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

Op, good intentions but a bit naive to use the example you did as theirs and your own situations are not the same..

It's natural to want to be together at such times of course and whilst it's hard if we all can't we at least have tech where your sister can turn a virtual tea party into an adventure for the little guy..

Go with that and enjoy..

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By *abriellajackCouple
over a year ago

Newport

[Removed by poster at 09/04/20 07:38:59]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Okay I'm sorry for asking the question... I will tell her to cancel.

But you weren't following social distancing rules?

Amd I'm sorry if you think I'm judgemental as I said very early on if you want to break the rules do so, just don't seek validation from people telling you its okay to do so when it clearly isn't.

Anyway I'm off to work now. Key worker, in the middle of this shitstorm. Possibly a little sensitive to people who think they can bend the rules

I was asking people's opinion on the existing rules and I sure as hell got my answer. In any case I have told her to just knock and say happy birthday through the window

But it's not essential travel...

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By *abriellajackCouple
over a year ago

Newport

"Also "borrow some things" does not equate to essential travel."

And how would you know that? She could be borrowing something she needs for an essential house repair for power /heating etc and would therefore be permitted to travel to a hardware store to buy one.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Also "borrow some things" does not equate to essential travel.

And it's just a coincidence that it's on your mother's birthday and your sister will bring the kids that she has to collect it.

No it's not a coincidence. I said in my OP that we wanted to kill two birds with one stone.

I am not putting anything in the boot of her car. I don't know why you've assumed that I'm leaving the house at all. I'm cleaning the item, picking it up with latex gloves and leaving it outside. Knowing her she will clean it again when she gets home.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Op, good intentions but a bit naive to use the example you did as theirs and your own situations are not the same..

Go with that and enjoy.. "

Thank you for the useful and understanding input, that sounds like a great idea!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Children can move between homes. It’s still advised that as much as possible they don’t.

There’s a huge difference between a 5 year old not seeing their mum or Dad for the duration of this than other kids not seeing Grandparents or adults not seeing other adults.

There are also legal issues with stopping any movement when families face court orders.

It’s much like some workers are still working and some aren’t. It’s just about how essential things are and at the moment children seeing their other parent is on the acceptable list.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It would also be very harsh for your nephew to see his Gran and not hug her or get close to her.

Then once you get “one hug”, then that leads too “well it was fine last weekend” and so on and so forth.

It’s not a good idea

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By *adetMan
over a year ago

South of Ipswich

"Also "borrow some things" does not equate to essential travel.

And it's just a coincidence that it's on your mother's birthday and your sister will bring the kids that she has to collect it.

No it's not a coincidence. I said in my OP that we wanted to kill two birds with one stone.

You're still thinking that the rules that have been very clearly stated don't apply to you and your family

What if everybody thought that way?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Okay I'm sorry for asking the question... I will tell her to cancel.

But you weren't following social distancing rules?

Amd I'm sorry if you think I'm judgemental as I said very early on if you want to break the rules do so, just don't seek validation from people telling you its okay to do so when it clearly isn't.

Anyway I'm off to work now. Key worker, in the middle of this shitstorm. Possibly a little sensitive to people who think they can bend the rules

I was asking people's opinion on the existing rules and I sure as hell got my answer. In any case I have told her to just knock and say happy birthday through the window

But it's not essential travel..."

It is if she's ALSO picking up an item she NEEDS. Same as people going to shops for essentials. Even safer in fact as she will not come into contact with strangers and the item will be much cleaner than an item on a supermarket shelf. Please will you stop trying to pick these tiny holes; I've already conceded defeat on the main idea.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Op, good intentions but a bit naive to use the example you did as theirs and your own situations are not the same..

Go with that and enjoy..

Thank you for the useful and understanding input, that sounds like a great idea!

Me and my family done an online virtual quiz with our family think it’s called house ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The word essential varies to different people.

Mental health is an important factor.

Last week my friend was incredibly upset, her mental health very low.

I went to the shop, bought her some treats and left them at her door.

Now to most that wasn't essential shopping or driving but to her it made all the difference.

Ultimately you have to do what feels right for you. Don't ask for advice from strangers from the Internet because all you'll see is judgment

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By *heIcebreakersCouple
over a year ago

Cramlington

"Okay I'm sorry for asking the question... I will tell her to cancel.

"
Can I try and say a few kind words amongst all this?

When all this crap is over, when the virus has been tackled, and we're all making light of what we went through, have a think about this thread.

You came into it having worked out what you anted to do to address your needs, your sister's needs, and your mum's needs. Now, I'm not re-opening that debate, but you seem to have got to a point where you changed your mind because a bunch of randoms on the internet shouted at you.

Judging by the way you made your original decision you're not a bad person, you're not thoughtless, and you're motivated by more than just your needs (as opposed to, say, the complete loons who keep messaging us and asking if we're still meeting while this is going on).

So, when all this has calmed down, do you want to maybe think about why you needed to ask the question, why you doubted your own decision, and why you were swayed by a bunch of randoms on the web?

I know it's possible you haven't changed your mind, and you're going to go ahead anyway, but leaving that aside, why does it matter what the randoms say?

I don't know the answer, by the way, but you don't seem a bad person, and I wonder wbout what it says about your locus of evaluation that you changed your mind because the randoms were so vociferous, and you seem to have been wounded by them.

Have a nice day

Mr Icebreaker

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By *oldswarriorMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

Why bother even posting on here.

If you are going to do it you will do it. Why seek the advice from random strangers on a swinging site when all the current legislation and guidelines are readily available.

If you think its OK then crack on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One side effect of this virus seems to be sanctimonious levels are rising.

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By *ornLordMan
over a year ago

Wiltshire and London

The difference is co-parenting and the welfare of the child.

Your sister doesn't need to see your parents as much as she wants to

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your parents will add more pressure to the NHS if they catch it and end up in ICU. And it's against the law to visit relatives !!

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By * and R cple4Couple
over a year ago

swansea

"One side effect of this virus seems to be sanctimonious levels are rising. "

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By *asmin999jmTV/TS
over a year ago

wakefield

Imagine you have 9 lives, each time you take a risk, you loose a life......

So,.... save the risks (lives) for absolute essential activities, and keep safe,wear PPE, follow guidlenes....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The law is the law. Don't break it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Relax everyone, I have told her to just keep it to quick knock at the window when she comes to pick up the steam cleaner and she is okay with it. Lesson learned

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By *iverpool LoverMan
over a year ago

liverpool

I have been out a grand total of 3 times for essentials since lockdown started (I do all the shopping as I don't want to risk my parents getting it). Each time I:

- Wear a heavy duty fabric face mask which covers from the top of my nose to the bottom of my chin

- Wear latex gloves which I remove before I get back into my car and throw them away

- Wash my hands with sanitiser as soon as I get back to my car

- Wipe down anything I've bought with antibac wipes, transfer the items to clean carrier bags and throw the bag from the shop away

- Wipe my car door handles and keys

- Wash my hands as soon as I get in, put my clothes straight in the wash and wipe down any door handles/light switches I touched on the way in

After all that I'm pretty sure my chances of contracting the virus are practically 0. I know that my sister takes similar precautions - in fact, she avoids going to the shops at all.

TLDR - should we be able to visit family members who haven't been displaying symptoms? "

If you are sitting in the patio and they are sitting in the garden then regardless of what other posters are saying, i think you are quite safe with no risk.

Hundreds are people are standing closer at supermarkets yet they go out and "take the risk" so yeah sitting other side of the garden i assume you will be far more than 2 meters then go for it.

And if anyone in aunthority says any different tell them that you will abide by the stricter rules once the goverment stops jam packed trains, planes still coming into the country from various places around the world (even hot spots) and the passengers not even getting tested or a basic temprature test and are allowed to leave freely to jump on public transport.

(I know this cause my dad who was stuck in spain for 3 weeks managed to finally get a flight back to UK on Saturday and was shocked at how little any restrictions was in place, he left airport and got on train from london to liverpool.

He was expecting some kind of test or even questions but nope nothing.

So whilst all that is going on and allowed i think goverment have a cheek if they have a problem with you sitting across a garden and patio to say happy birthday to a loved one.

Theres very little risk in what you are proposing.

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By *adame 2SwordsWoman
over a year ago

Victoria, London

It's NOT essential

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By *entralscotscpl7Couple
over a year ago

Falkirk

"The law is the law. Don't break it."

The problem is its not enforced enough and people are carrying on with no regards for each others health and safety.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I have been out a grand total of 3 times for essentials since lockdown started (I do all the shopping as I don't want to risk my parents getting it). Each time I:

- Wear a heavy duty fabric face mask which covers from the top of my nose to the bottom of my chin

- Wear latex gloves which I remove before I get back into my car and throw them away

- Wash my hands with sanitiser as soon as I get back to my car

- Wipe down anything I've bought with antibac wipes, transfer the items to clean carrier bags and throw the bag from the shop away

- Wipe my car door handles and keys

- Wash my hands as soon as I get in, put my clothes straight in the wash and wipe down any door handles/light switches I touched on the way in

After all that I'm pretty sure my chances of contracting the virus are practically 0. I know that my sister takes similar precautions - in fact, she avoids going to the shops at all.

TLDR - should we be able to visit family members who haven't been displaying symptoms?

If you are sitting in the patio and they are sitting in the garden then regardless of what other posters are saying, i think you are quite safe with no risk.

Hundreds are people are standing closer at supermarkets yet they go out and "take the risk" so yeah sitting other side of the garden i assume you will be far more than 2 meters then go for it.

He was expecting some kind of test or even questions but nope nothing.

So whilst all that is going on and allowed i think goverment have a cheek if they have a problem with you sitting across a garden and patio to say happy birthday to a loved one.

Theres very little risk in what you are proposing."

My plan was initially to have us sitting in the living room and them out in the garden with the patio doors open so we would be easily 10m apart and not even outside together at the same time but in any case I've cancelled that plan now. In hindsight I don't think my parents would have let it happen anyway.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is it for daily exercise..No

Is it for medical reasons...No

Is it for shopping...No

Is it essential...No

These are the only reasons anyone should be going out and the longer people bend the rules to suit themselves they longer we will be in lockdown

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Okay I'm sorry for asking the question... I will tell her to cancel.

People don't know how to express themselves. It would appear lots also don't know how to answer the question asked without being a dick about it either.

My thoughts are, you have worked out the risks and put precautions in place so it can be as safe as possible. Do I agree with it, that's irrelevant. It's your call regardless of what we as strangers think.

An example of sticking by the rules but actually similar.

I was walking the dog last week when I came across a friend walking his dog too. We stopped and spoke for a good 10-15 mins whilst keeping our distance. Technically this is within the rules and actually no different to what you propose here.

All I will say is do as you do OP. Everyone will have their own opinion on it but it doesn't make anyone right

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By *entralscotscpl7Couple
over a year ago

Falkirk

I have been out a grand total of 3 times for essentials since lockdown started (I do all the shopping as I don't want to risk my parents getting it). Each time I:

- Wear a heavy duty fabric face mask which covers from the top of my nose to the bottom of my chin

- Wear latex gloves which I remove before I get back into my car and throw them away

- Wash my hands with sanitiser as soon as I get back to my car

- Wipe down anything I've bought with antibac wipes, transfer the items to clean carrier bags and throw the bag from the shop away

- Wipe my car door handles and keys

- Wash my hands as soon as I get in, put my clothes straight in the wash and wipe down any door handles/light switches I touched on the way in

After all that I'm pretty sure my chances of contracting the virus are practically 0. I know that my sister takes similar precautions - in fact, she avoids going to the shops at all.

TLDR - should we be able to visit family members who haven't been displaying symptoms?

If you are sitting in the patio and they are sitting in the garden then regardless of what other posters are saying, i think you are quite safe with no risk.

Hundreds are people are standing closer at supermarkets yet they go out and "take the risk" so yeah sitting other side of the garden i assume you will be far more than 2 meters then go for it.

He was expecting some kind of test or even questions but nope nothing.

So whilst all that is going on and allowed i think goverment have a cheek if they have a problem with you sitting across a garden and patio to say happy birthday to a loved one.

Theres very little risk in what you are proposing."

I would say this is the issue. You are telling her there is very little risk in what she is proposing but the guidelines say the opposite.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have been out a grand total of 3 times for essentials since lockdown started (I do all the shopping as I don't want to risk my parents getting it). Each time I:

- Wear a heavy duty fabric face mask which covers from the top of my nose to the bottom of my chin

- Wear latex gloves which I remove before I get back into my car and throw them away

- Wash my hands with sanitiser as soon as I get back to my car

- Wipe down anything I've bought with antibac wipes, transfer the items to clean carrier bags and throw the bag from the shop away

- Wipe my car door handles and keys

- Wash my hands as soon as I get in, put my clothes straight in the wash and wipe down any door handles/light switches I touched on the way in

After all that I'm pretty sure my chances of contracting the virus are practically 0. I know that my sister takes similar precautions - in fact, she avoids going to the shops at all.

TLDR - should we be able to visit family members who haven't been displaying symptoms? "

It can also enter through your eyes !!!

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By *iverpool LoverMan
over a year ago

liverpool

I have been out a grand total of 3 times for essentials since lockdown started (I do all the shopping as I don't want to risk my parents getting it). Each time I:

- Wear a heavy duty fabric face mask which covers from the top of my nose to the bottom of my chin

- Wear latex gloves which I remove before I get back into my car and throw them away

- Wash my hands with sanitiser as soon as I get back to my car

- Wipe down anything I've bought with antibac wipes, transfer the items to clean carrier bags and throw the bag from the shop away

- Wipe my car door handles and keys

- Wash my hands as soon as I get in, put my clothes straight in the wash and wipe down any door handles/light switches I touched on the way in

After all that I'm pretty sure my chances of contracting the virus are practically 0. I know that my sister takes similar precautions - in fact, she avoids going to the shops at all.

TLDR - should we be able to visit family members who haven't been displaying symptoms?

If you are sitting in the patio and they are sitting in the garden then regardless of what other posters are saying, i think you are quite safe with no risk.

Hundreds are people are standing closer at supermarkets yet they go out and "take the risk" so yeah sitting other side of the garden i assume you will be far more than 2 meters then go for it.

He was expecting some kind of test or even questions but nope nothing.

So whilst all that is going on and allowed i think goverment have a cheek if they have a problem with you sitting across a garden and patio to say happy birthday to a loved one.

Theres very little risk in what you are proposing.

I would say this is the issue. You are telling her there is very little risk in what she is proposing but the guidelines say the opposite.

If it was true you could catch it from other people being more than 2 meters away then i doubt they would people en mass going into supermarkets still.

The guidelines are to keep two meters away.

Maybe this lady could take her daily exercise and walk to their house (no idea how far apart they live) then once there take a 5 min breather, eat their cake in the garden say their happy birthdays and then head back home.

Theres no risk in that surely?

If there was then like i said they wouldnt allow people to go to supermarkets on mass they would prob allocate time slots for different age groups to keep it all to a minimum.

All i kmow is what this lady proposed i see very little danger in any catching the virus, let's not lose perspective the chance of catching the virus still has a statistic of 0.something %

And keeping 10 meters apart like this lady suggested after beimg in isolatiom for 3 weeks as has her family then neither family have the virus and keeping 10 meters apart well that percentage is prob 0.0000000% of them catching it.

People are scaremongerimg makimg people think even just opening the door your likely to catch it.

Seen a picture on internet floating around of loads of covid 19 virus molcules everywhere in the air saying "if you could see it you wouldnt leave your home".

Thats utter BS this virus is not airborne and will only be airborne for few seconds after a cough or sneeze but will quickly drop to the ground.

This is not airborne

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

If everyone adheres to the government advice and rules then we will get rid of this vile disease. A family meet is not allowed no matter how many meters apart you are.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m probably going to get villainised here by the majority, but it was my mums birthday yesterday and me and my little one went to see her. We kept probably further than two metres apart at all times talking down the garden path. In the run up to seeing each we have checked if either side had any symptoms (appreciate that it’s a potentially a two week incubation period) but I felt that situation is safer than the odd occasion when I have had to go food shopping and you are queuing up with people that you don’t know. My flip side to it is I don’t know how old your nephew is, but my little one found it tough not to be able to give his grandparents a hug, and on the way home he was saying how much he missed them, so in hindsight maybe seeing them made it harder for him?? In life there’s risks whatever you do and the advice changes in regard to corona depending on which ‘expert’ is speaking. There will be people who fall into the two extremes those who don’t care and are still meeting people and having parties etc, and those that have been isolating away completely, with the majority probably falling into the middle just trying their best and getting on with it. It’s the same with swinging you will have some that see bareback as an acceptable risk and others that would never participate.

You seem a very switched on and risk aware individual and whatever you decide to do it’s your choice. Don’t feel bad for wanting to see your family!!I think a few people on here should remember it wasn’t too long ago we were all posting about ‘being kind’.

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By *entralscotscpl7Couple
over a year ago

Falkirk

I have been out a grand total of 3 times for essentials since lockdown started (I do all the shopping as I don't want to risk my parents getting it). Each time I:

- Wear a heavy duty fabric face mask which covers from the top of my nose to the bottom of my chin

- Wear latex gloves which I remove before I get back into my car and throw them away

- Wash my hands with sanitiser as soon as I get back to my car

- Wipe down anything I've bought with antibac wipes, transfer the items to clean carrier bags and throw the bag from the shop away

- Wipe my car door handles and keys

- Wash my hands as soon as I get in, put my clothes straight in the wash and wipe down any door handles/light switches I touched on the way in

After all that I'm pretty sure my chances of contracting the virus are practically 0. I know that my sister takes similar precautions - in fact, she avoids going to the shops at all.

TLDR - should we be able to visit family members who haven't been displaying symptoms?

If you are sitting in the patio and they are sitting in the garden then regardless of what other posters are saying, i think you are quite safe with no risk.

Hundreds are people are standing closer at supermarkets yet they go out and "take the risk" so yeah sitting other side of the garden i assume you will be far more than 2 meters then go for it.

He was expecting some kind of test or even questions but nope nothing.

So whilst all that is going on and allowed i think goverment have a cheek if they have a problem with you sitting across a garden and patio to say happy birthday to a loved one.

Theres very little risk in what you are proposing.

I would say this is the issue. You are telling her there is very little risk in what she is proposing but the guidelines say the opposite.

If it was true you could catch it from other people being more than 2 meters away then i doubt they would people en mass going into supermarkets still.

The guidelines are to keep two meters away.

Theres no risk in that surely?

If there was then like i said they wouldnt allow people to go to supermarkets on mass they would prob allocate time slots for different age groups to keep it all to a minimum.

All i kmow is what this lady proposed i see very little danger in any catching the virus, let's not lose perspective the chance of catching the virus still has a statistic of 0.something %

People are scaremongerimg makimg people think even just opening the door your likely to catch it.

Seen a picture on internet floating around of loads of covid 19 virus molcules everywhere in the air saying "if you could see it you wouldnt leave your home".

Thats utter BS this virus is not airborne and will only be airborne for few seconds after a cough or sneeze but will quickly drop to the ground.

This is not airborne "

Its about reducing the spread.

If you know better i would love to read your official papers on it.

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By *iverpool LoverMan
over a year ago

liverpool

"I’m probably going to get villainised here by the majority, but it was my mums birthday yesterday and me and my little one went to see her. We kept probably further than two metres apart at all times talking down the garden path. In the run up to seeing each we have checked if either side had any symptoms (appreciate that it’s a potentially a two week incubation period) but I felt that situation is safer than the odd occasion when I have had to go food shopping and you are queuing up with people that you don’t know. My flip side to it is I don’t know how old your nephew is, but my little one found it tough not to be able to give his grandparents a hug, and on the way home he was saying how much he missed them, so in hindsight maybe seeing them made it harder for him?? In life there’s risks whatever you do and the advice changes in regard to corona depending on which ‘expert’ is speaking. There will be people who fall into the two extremes those who don’t care and are still meeting people and having parties etc, and those that have been isolating away completely, with the majority probably falling into the middle just trying their best and getting on with it. It’s the same with swinging you will have some that see bareback as an acceptable risk and others that would never participate.

No judgnent from me

I say good for you.

One thing from all this is i seen somthing far more scarier than this virus.

Ive seen neighbour turn against neighbour.

All watching each other, curtain twitching.

Reporting each other if they see anyome leavimg the house for a second time.

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By *adetMan
over a year ago

South of Ipswich

If the risk was only to yourself then nobody would have a problem. But it isn't! You're risking everybody else's health too

However you want to justify breaking the rules the fact remains that if everybody thought that way we'd all be going through this for a lot longer

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No judgnent from me

I say good for you.

One thing from all this is i seen somthing far more scarier than this virus.

Ive seen neighbour turn against neighbour.

All watching each other, curtain twitching.

Reporting each other if they see anyome leavimg the house for a second time.

Thank you and I agree I’ve seen some awful posts on social media sites of people trying to shame and judge others actions without knowing the full story. Someone posted a picture of a lady at the height of the craziness with food shortages, coming out of a shop with four bottles of milk saying how selfish etc. A lot of people joined in but it turned out she was buying milk for her elderly neighbours! People are too quick to judge and this situation is bringing out the best and the worst in some people x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If the risk was only to yourself then nobody would have a problem. But it isn't! You're risking everybody else's health too

However you want to justify breaking the rules the fact remains that if everybody thought that way we'd all be going through this for a lot longer "

In this case I wouldn't have been risking everybody's health. My sister does not go to the shops at all, she gets her shopping delivered and the driver waits at the end of her driveway while she unloads the crates. She goes for walks sometimes but lives in a remote area so doesn't come across anyone. She literally has not seen anybody outside her household (apart from delivery driver) since lockdown started and won't be for the rest of it so it would be impossible for her to spread it. If she had it she would have shown symptoms by now. But like I've said repeatedly now, the plan is cancelled. There's no use carrying on trying to make me feel bad.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If the risk was only to yourself then nobody would have a problem. But it isn't! You're risking everybody else's health too

However you want to justify breaking the rules the fact remains that if everybody thought that way we'd all be going through this for a lot longer

No one has the right to make you feel bad hun!! Sending hugs and you do whatever’s right no one has the right to judge you either xxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

No judgnent from me

I say good for you.

One thing from all this is i seen somthing far more scarier than this virus.

Ive seen neighbour turn against neighbour.

All watching each other, curtain twitching.

Reporting each other if they see anyome leavimg the house for a second time.

Exactly! Nobody (except for one person on this thread I messaged privately) knows what my home situation is like and what I am going through at the moment. I get that this situation is horrible for everyone and we all have our own crosses to bear; I'm genuinely sorry for thinking spending 5 minutes with my beloved sister and nephew from a government-approved distance might have helped me with mine somewhat...

In any case I'm glad you managed to work out a way to see your mother and hope it made you both feel a little better x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The lesson we should all take from this is it's more prudent to go about your business quietly

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

"If the risk was only to yourself then nobody would have a problem. But it isn't! You're risking everybody else's health too

However you want to justify breaking the rules the fact remains that if everybody thought that way we'd all be going through this for a lot longer

No one has the right to make you feel bad hun!! Sending hugs and you do whatever’s right no one has the right to judge you either xxx"

It seems like judging but it is not. OP created the thread for reassurance that she was doing right by having a family get together when it’s actually against the rules. It doesn’t matter how often we wipe door handles at home or throw carrier bags away, the rules are no family gatherings or visiting family. I’ve been working from home now for nearly three weeks, only going out for essential shopping, helping my 82 year old neighbour with her shopping and prescriptions and reading this kind of thread where people are ‘planning’ family get togethers and going against the rules annoys me as I’m following guidance set by our Government. If people do what they like then this disease will stay around longer!

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

COVID-19 are in heavy particles that drop to the floor after approx 5-6 feet. Sounds like fake news

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By *ingo69Man
over a year ago

north staffs ,south cheshire borderr

I would rather wait until all this is over and see all the family healthy and well and have a bloody good party , than see them now , as in a few weeks down the line could be in a wooden box dead , I know it sounds harsh , 7,097 up to now passed away , some stats I would like to know though are how many of these deaths have been or were smokers as it affects the lungs

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

"I would rather wait until all this is over and see all the family healthy and well and have a bloody good party , than see them now , as in a few weeks down the line could be in a wooden box dead , I know it sounds harsh , 7,097 up to now passed away , some stats I would like to know though are how many of these deaths have been or were smokers as it affects the lungs "

Also I would like to know how many of those deaths were from doctors playing god as not enough medical equipment or staff.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure how many were smokers but did you know that up to week12 we are still slightly down on the 5 year average?

That means the average death toll in the first 12 weeks over the previous 5 years is still slightly higher than where we are this year. Even with the supposed 6k Covid-19 deaths

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We're all in the same boat.

We're all missing people, missing human contact, missing birthdays.

But no. It's just one of those things...plan a day out for when this is all over.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Okay I'm sorry for asking the question... I will tell her to cancel.

But you weren't following social distancing rules?

Amd I'm sorry if you think I'm judgemental as I said very early on if you want to break the rules do so, just don't seek validation from people telling you its okay to do so when it clearly isn't.

Anyway I'm off to work now. Key worker, in the middle of this shitstorm. Possibly a little sensitive to people who think they can bend the rules

Snap!! Don't have a choice but to be amongst those are symptomatic and refusing to follow the rules.

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By *uttyjonnMan
over a year ago

SEA

It's never been easier to stay in touch, voice calls, video calls, you can play games for hours with grandkids, read stories etc

It's only a few weeks, if you were doing 3 weeks in Disneyland you wouldn't be this desperate

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By *ax777Man
over a year ago

Not here

Not sure how many were smokers but did you know that up to week12 we are still slightly down on the 5 year average?

That means the average death toll in the first 12 weeks over the previous 5 years is still slightly higher than where we are this year. Even with the supposed 6k Covid-19 deaths"

Up to week 12 there had only been 103 Covid-19 deaths, all in week 12, so there is no discernible difference. Week 13 shows an increase of just over 1000 against the 5 year average, of which over half were a Covid-19 linked.

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

Not sure how many were smokers but did you know that up to week12 we are still slightly down on the 5 year average?

That means the average death toll in the first 12 weeks over the previous 5 years is still slightly higher than where we are this year. Even with the supposed 6k Covid-19 deaths"

What do you mean supposed?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure how many were smokers but did you know that up to week12 we are still slightly down on the 5 year average?

That means the average death toll in the first 12 weeks over the previous 5 years is still slightly higher than where we are this year. Even with the supposed 6k Covid-19 deaths

What do you mean supposed?"

By supposed I meant that I dont quite believe the figures. A lot of these people died with Covid-19 and not because of.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure how many were smokers but did you know that up to week12 we are still slightly down on the 5 year average?

That means the average death toll in the first 12 weeks over the previous 5 years is still slightly higher than where we are this year. Even with the supposed 6k Covid-19 deaths

That figure represents an increase in week 13 only. Not 13 weeks. We need the data to be taken over a longer period of time and not just one week

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Okay I'm sorry for asking the question... I will tell her to cancel.

Don't ask a question unless you state at the start what answers are allowed

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By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed

How will your sister and nephew get to the garden, which surfaces will they touch on route?

" I have been out a grand total of 3 times for essentials since lockdown started (I do all the shopping as I don't want to risk my parents getting it). Each time I:

- Wear a heavy duty fabric face mask which covers from the top of my nose to the bottom of my chin

- Wear latex gloves which I remove before I get back into my car and throw them away

- Wash my hands with sanitiser as soon as I get back to my car

- Wipe down anything I've bought with antibac wipes, transfer the items to clean carrier bags and throw the bag from the shop away

- Wipe my car door handles and keys

- Wash my hands as soon as I get in, put my clothes straight in the wash and wipe down any door handles/light switches I touched on the way in

After all that I'm pretty sure my chances of contracting the virus are practically 0. I know that my sister takes similar precautions - in fact, she avoids going to the shops at all.

TLDR - should we be able to visit family members who haven't been displaying symptoms? "

Firstly kids are low risk for a multitude of reasons and most of their parents will also be low risk, but it is one limited freedom. I don't equate a child seeing their parent as equivalent to teen or grown adults seeing others. But I do no some separated parents who are not transferring kids just to be safe.

Secondly I'm not going to get into how safe you and your sister are, but let's go on the premise that all your actions mean you are safe.

How on earth would you police such a rule? How are the authorities to know whether someone out seeing relatives is as safe as the next person. As more people move about then that encourages the next person to do the same.

So your sister and nephew sitting in your mums garden then normalises that behaviour a little bit more for the next person. Slippery slope and all that.

When this was coming and cases started turning up in the UK me and the kids had one last visit to mum and dad and told them we would not see them for a few months. As adults we have to lead by example.

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

Op think of it a different way.

So a few weeks ago a police chief was on the radio taking phone call questions.

An old man asked.

" Where is the harm in myself and my wife driving to a secluded spot staying in the car taking a flask of tea winding the windows down and enjoying the view and get some fresh air"

Here was the response from the police.

As a single case this alone would be fine but if we allow one single case then others will follow before you know it everyone is out doing the same, also and consider this op something that alot of people don't think about.

Every time we leave the house in a car there's a possibility we could be involved in an accident be it our fault or someone else.

So let's say an accident that requires police, ambulance possibly fire brigade almost definitely a tow truck and maybe someone to clean it up, if it's really bad then also maybe a crew to repair damage to barriers or roads.

Then people transported to hospital.

So you see a simple trip up the road has the potential to infect dozens who each infect dozens......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why do you and your family think the rules don't apply to you?"

If you read properly she hasn’t said that

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By *uckandbunnyCouple
over a year ago

In your bed

Not sure how many were smokers but did you know that up to week12 we are still slightly down on the 5 year average?

That means the average death toll in the first 12 weeks over the previous 5 years is still slightly higher than where we are this year. Even with the supposed 6k Covid-19 deaths

That figure represents an increase in week 13 only. Not 13 weeks. We need the data to be taken over a longer period of time and not just one week"

Yes but data prior to covid19 taking hold in the UK is irrelevant and only tells us we had a milder winter so less deaths because of that.

The next 12 weeks are where we will see the impact of COVID19

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By *ax777Man
over a year ago

Not here

Not sure how many were smokers but did you know that up to week12 we are still slightly down on the 5 year average?

That means the average death toll in the first 12 weeks over the previous 5 years is still slightly higher than where we are this year. Even with the supposed 6k Covid-19 deaths

That figure represents an increase in week 13 only. Not 13 weeks. We need the data to be taken over a longer period of time and not just one week"

I fully understand what that figure represents. I’m simply saying that as the first Covid -19 deaths did not occur until week 12 your statement on the first 12 weeks is totally meaningless. The figures from week 13 on will be much more meaning-full.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh and if you think visiting people displaying no symptoms is okay. Look up the meaning of asymptomatic."

If you read it properly she was only asking a question. She stated she absolutely wasn’t going to come in contact but was just curious.

Jeez give the girl a break will ya

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure how many were smokers but did you know that up to week12 we are still slightly down on the 5 year average?

That means the average death toll in the first 12 weeks over the previous 5 years is still slightly higher than where we are this year. Even with the supposed 6k Covid-19 deaths

That figure represents an increase in week 13 only. Not 13 weeks. We need the data to be taken over a longer period of time and not just one week

Yes but data prior to covid19 taking hold in the UK is irrelevant and only tells us we had a milder winter so less deaths because of that.

The next 12 weeks are where we will see the impact of COVID19"

I dont disagree with that.

We need the data for the second quarter (which obviously isn't available yet). Until then it's all speculation. But, that was my point. Every figure thrown around is speculation until long term data is available and can be compared

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By *heIcebreakersCouple
over a year ago

Cramlington

"Imagine you have 9 lives, each time you take a risk, you loose a life......

So,.... save the risks (lives) for absolute essential activities, and keep safe,wear PPE, follow guidlenes.... "
No, no no. That's the type of behaviour that inspires people to take a risk 'just the once' and ends up with them contracting the virus.

Factors behind morbidity appear to include the viral load, which may be related to the number ot times you're exposed to the virus, but since there's plenty of evidence that endogenous factors drive the morbidity, for some people (who can't all be identified by prior screeeing) one exposure will be enough for a fatal outcome.

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

Not sure how many were smokers but did you know that up to week12 we are still slightly down on the 5 year average?

That means the average death toll in the first 12 weeks over the previous 5 years is still slightly higher than where we are this year. Even with the supposed 6k Covid-19 deaths

What do you mean supposed?

By supposed I meant that I dont quite believe the figures. A lot of these people died with Covid-19 and not because of.

I have type 2 diabetes and it's highly possible that I will die of a complication as a result of it someday.

So you see if I die with diabetes but the actual cause of death is let's say sepsis as a result of me being admitted to hospital because of an infection I picked up due to my weakened immune system due to my diabetes.

What's my cause of death??

Sepsis,the infection I picked up that resulted in hospital treatment or the reason I picked up the infection in the first place my diabetes that caused my immune system to be less than perfect??

This is just an example but you get my meaning, hopefully.

Just because someone dies of something other than covid 19 it is usually the reason why they died due to it causing their bodies to weaken .

And besides noone actually does from it they die as a result of it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure how many were smokers but did you know that up to week12 we are still slightly down on the 5 year average?

That means the average death toll in the first 12 weeks over the previous 5 years is still slightly higher than where we are this year. Even with the supposed 6k Covid-19 deaths

What do you mean supposed?

By supposed I meant that I dont quite believe the figures. A lot of these people died with Covid-19 and not because of.

I have type 2 diabetes and it's highly possible that I will die of a complication as a result of it someday.

What's my cause of death??

Sepsis,the infection I picked up that resulted in hospital treatment or the reason I picked up the infection in the first place my diabetes that caused my immune system to be less than perfect??

This is just an example but you get my meaning, hopefully.

Just because someone dies of something other than covid 19 it is usually the reason why they died due to it causing their bodies to weaken .

And besides noone actually does from it they die as a result of it."

I do get your meaning. It's difficult to compare all of this.

All I'm saying is I believe a some of these deaths would've/could've happened regardless whether it was flu, common cold or Covid-19. I just don't truly believe the figures.

That's not me taking away from how serious it is. Just showing that figures can be skewed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My rule for this situation, if you have to think about it, or make excuses for it, dont do it. ITS NOT ESSENTIAL.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The rules are very clear in saying not to visit friends or family, leave house for essential shopping, one form of exercise or to go to work. The rules do not say it's ok to visit if you stay 2 metres apart.

We all have responsibility not only to ourselves and people close to us but also to a wider society.

My mother in law is on the death bed with the virus. There's no place for her in a hospital as they're prioritising places for younger ones. My mother, husband and his two sisters will be the next ones if they get the virus when hospitals are overfilled. They may get a chance of survival if the right care at the hospital is available for them.

Anybody breaking the rules are potentially adding to the peak of the outbreak, taking the chance of survival from others. Personally I see those people as not giving a shit about anyone else.

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

Not sure how many were smokers but did you know that up to week12 we are still slightly down on the 5 year average?

That means the average death toll in the first 12 weeks over the previous 5 years is still slightly higher than where we are this year. Even with the supposed 6k Covid-19 deaths

What do you mean supposed?

By supposed I meant that I dont quite believe the figures. A lot of these people died with Covid-19 and not because of.

I have type 2 diabetes and it's highly possible that I will die of a complication as a result of it someday.

What's my cause of death??

Sepsis,the infection I picked up that resulted in hospital treatment or the reason I picked up the infection in the first place my diabetes that caused my immune system to be less than perfect??

This is just an example but you get my meaning, hopefully.

Just because someone dies of something other than covid 19 it is usually the reason why they died due to it causing their bodies to weaken .

And besides noone actually does from it they die as a result of it.

I do get your meaning. It's difficult to compare all of this.

All I'm saying is I believe a some of these deaths would've/could've happened regardless whether it was flu, common cold or Covid-19. I just don't truly believe the figures.

That's not me taking away from how serious it is. Just showing that figures can be skewed"

Yes but most of those people who would have died anyway could have had a week a month a year two three or ten more years.

And as for the figures I can see what you are saying and pretty sure there's some political agenda in play to what end I don't know.

Ultimately people are dying as a result of covid 19 end of.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

It isn't judging to answer your question, it is people trying to get others to understand what we ALL have to do whether we like it or not.

It is hard for all of us not to be able to see family, if we all decided to visit and sit outside our family's house then there will be people everywhere whilst travelling, which defeats the object of only travelling when essential.

To do what you want to do is the same as an MP did with his ex MP dad on his birthday, he drove to see him, sat at the end of the drive while they sat at the front door and then got carpeted by the police on Twitter as we are not meant to be doing it.

The shopping is essential so why we are allowed out then, although you are right that we are probably closer to people doing that, but we either do that or starve. We have limited that to once a fortnight now and just getting milk from the local shop which has strict rules to use...better than the supermarkets to be honest.

It is hard, we all know this, for me though I think it would be harder to see them in the flesh as you can't go near them to cuddle.

I think your logic is right but I think you probably knew the answer before you asked, I am so want to do the same, but if we did and then the next person did then the next etc then we will be undoing what is trying to be achieved..... we all just need to do as asked to get through this even though it really is hard for us all.

We have a virtual meet every night on whatsap, maybe have a virtual birthday party

Try not to take peoples answers as an attack, they are just trying to get the message over urgently.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"You're ignoring the guidelines. Its down to you to justify that not us.

For what it's worth my opinion is you shouldn't be doing that"

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

"It isn't judging to answer your question, it is people trying to get others to understand what we ALL have to do whether we like it or not.

It is hard, we all know this, for me though I think it would be harder to see them in the flesh as you can't go near them to cuddle.

We have a virtual meet every night on whatsap, maybe have a virtual birthday party

Try not to take peoples answers as an attack, they are just trying to get the message over urgently. "

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

Of course I fully understand why you want to do it but Don't go.

Set up a FaceTime or Zoom call and stay at home.

Heaven forbid you're in a bad car crash and tie up valuable nursing staff, doctors through your actions when they could be fighting this virus.

Good luck avoiding the traffic road blocks and fine.

I'm a great believer that if someone wants to do stupid things to just themselves it's all good ie wrap their car around a tree after drink driving but I draw the line where stupid actions have a knock on effect and ruin other peoples life's.

Please stay home

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It isn't judging to answer your question, it is people trying to get others to understand what we ALL have to do whether we like it or not.

It is hard, we all know this, for me though I think it would be harder to see them in the flesh as you can't go near them to cuddle.

We have a virtual meet every night on whatsap, maybe have a virtual birthday party

Try not to take peoples answers as an attack, they are just trying to get the message over urgently. "

I completely get your points, I do. Honestly the plan made in a bit of a moment of weakness as I was desperate to try and lift my parents' spirits. Without going into personal issues, things are starting to get very tense over here and we are all on edge.

Since starting this thread I've messaged my sister and told her I changed my mind. She still needs to come and pick up the steam cleaner she needs to clean her house but she's going to keep it to a knock and a wave at the window and she's fine with that. I've said this repeatedly so I don't understand why some (not all) people are speaking to me like I'm such a selfish, terrible person. Up til now I have done absolutely nothing to break the rules and I will continue to do so. If you read back the replies I have gotten I'm sorry but there have been more than a couple of attacks on my character.

Honestly I think this situation is intensifying people's views and opinions even more than normal. Please remember that people have things they are going through while also dealing with this massive shit storm. You can still impart your opinion while being kind, like some people have done - this post I'm replying to being an example of that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am going to sound judgmental

I’m a nurse in the midst of this.

Scared to go to work.

Scared for what PPE I’m going to have that shift.

Scared that I may have my ID badge stolen - yes we staff are getting attacked in car parks for them

I’m dealing with neighbours flouting the rules every weekend with no care but are happy to justify their actions to anyone who will listen.

I am scared even more over this weekend as to what I have to put up with as well as go to work.

It’s is not acceptable to go and see anyone.

And it’s is not essential to be picking up a steam cleaner.

What is it that people are not understanding about these restrictions?

This is not a time for people to be stretching the restrictions to suit.

I may sound harsh but you know what fuck it.

Just stay the fuck at home unless it’s essential and this shit will be over sooner.

If anyone wants to take offence please feel free to come to work with me.

And for those that are trying to trivialise the deaths by staying they had and not died from it please bury your head in more sand and please stay the fuck at home while you are doing it.

And those who think it’s a hoax or a scam, hop over to the nearest Hospital and ask them to look at the procedures, strategies and redeployment.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I am going to sound judgmental

I’m a nurse in the midst of this.

Scared to go to work.

Scared for what PPE I’m going to have that shift.

Scared that I may have my ID badge stolen - yes we staff are getting attacked in car parks for them

I’m dealing with neighbours flouting the rules every weekend with no care but are happy to justify their actions to anyone who will listen.

I am scared even more over this weekend as to what I have to put up with as well as go to work.

It’s is not acceptable to go and see anyone.

And it’s is not essential to be picking up a steam cleaner.

What is it that people are not understanding about these restrictions?

This is not a time for people to be stretching the restrictions to suit.

I may sound harsh but you know what fuck it.

Just stay the fuck at home unless it’s essential and this shit will be over sooner.

If anyone wants to take offence please feel free to come to work with me.

And for those that are trying to trivialise the deaths by staying they had and not died from it please bury your head in more sand and please stay the fuck at home while you are doing it.

And those who think it’s a hoax or a scam, hop over to the nearest Hospital and ask them to look at the procedures, strategies and redeployment.

Well said

Thank you for what you're doing!

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

The rules are in place for a reason. Essential travel only for food meds and work. The rules don’t change just because people try to justify it unfortunately. I understand the urge but i don’t agree with breaking the rules.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

Two of my children and two of my six grandchildren live less than 15 minutes walk from me.

My "baby" and her husband had the virus, minor symptoms and I didn't see any of my children, grandchildren for mother's day.

I was due to visit my sister in Milan at Christmas but got a new job the day before I bought my ticket. Easter was going to be spent in Wales with my eldest and her family before flying to Milan. What do they say about best laid plans?

This is the longest period I've not seen my family and friends, I'm not alone in this, so it really pisses me off when people think they're special, their situation is worse than others.

We will get through this quicker if people stop being selfish.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I am going to sound judgmental

I’m a nurse in the midst of this.

Scared to go to work.

Scared for what PPE I’m going to have that shift.

Scared that I may have my ID badge stolen - yes we staff are getting attacked in car parks for them

I’m dealing with neighbours flouting the rules every weekend with no care but are happy to justify their actions to anyone who will listen.

I am scared even more over this weekend as to what I have to put up with as well as go to work.

It’s is not acceptable to go and see anyone.

And it’s is not essential to be picking up a steam cleaner.

What is it that people are not understanding about these restrictions?

This is not a time for people to be stretching the restrictions to suit.

I may sound harsh but you know what fuck it.

Just stay the fuck at home unless it’s essential and this shit will be over sooner.

If anyone wants to take offence please feel free to come to work with me.

And for those that are trying to trivialise the deaths by staying they had and not died from it please bury your head in more sand and please stay the fuck at home while you are doing it.

And those who think it’s a hoax or a scam, hop over to the nearest Hospital and ask them to look at the procedures, strategies and redeployment.

A steam cleaner is now an essential journey, jesus it's getting even more stupid

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By *-4pleasureCouple
over a year ago

Belfast

Give the girl a fucking break.

She was wrong.

She’s admitted she was wrong.

A lesson has been learnt so out your flaming torches and pitchforks away and do something constructive

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"It isn't judging to answer your question, it is people trying to get others to understand what we ALL have to do whether we like it or not.

It is hard, we all know this, for me though I think it would be harder to see them in the flesh as you can't go near them to cuddle.

We have a virtual meet every night on whatsap, maybe have a virtual birthday party

Try not to take peoples answers as an attack, they are just trying to get the message over urgently.

I can understand that and I bet a lot of other people will too. I think the point is though, whilst your idea is not quite the same as the stupid people about who are still out riding bikes right next to people who are being interviewed on the telly, it is still against what we should be doing and why people are being very blunt in their comments about staying in

I have thought many times the same as you that it is only a little visit and I bet most people have too so don't feel bad about it , as long as we don't act on it is the key

(I will go read the thread again incase I missed anything )

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By *ittleMissCaliWoman
over a year ago

all loved up

"One side effect of this virus seems to be sanctimonious levels are rising. "
isnt it just.. I dont know anyone that hasnt at least purchased something that wasnt essential.

Nearly 3 weeks in we are starting to see a lot more mental health issues.. I know skating around the rules.. not quite bending or breaking them but its certainly been for my well being. For example. I go the back roads on my shop trips... just so I get a nice drive. I also volunteered across a wider area.. so I can drive further.

I'm doing something similar to what the OP suggested but for socially isolated people with special needs. I've had cuppas and cake with them at a distance as part of the community volunteering I'm doing. And that's been allowed.

I have now been told where possible to wear a mask but it scares some of the people so I dont always and some of them dont/ cant understand the keeping 2m apart.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Of course I fully understand why you want to do it but Don't go.

Set up a FaceTime or Zoom call and stay at home.

Heaven forbid you're in a bad car crash and tie up valuable nursing staff, doctors through your actions when they could be fighting this virus.

Good luck avoiding the traffic road blocks and fine.

Please stay home"

OP is going nowhere..

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"The word essential varies to different people.

Mental health is an important factor.

Last week my friend was incredibly upset, her mental health very low.

I went to the shop, bought her some treats and left them at her door.

Now to most that wasn't essential shopping or driving but to her it made all the difference.

Ultimately you have to do what feels right for you. Don't ask for advice from strangers from the Internet because all you'll see is judgment "

Personally I'd call that essential. Mental health is vital. Although furloughed we still have our weekly staff meeting, but the first hour is just to find out how everyone is, encouraging each other to go for a walk etc a well being check, no work talk at all. We all have each other's personal phone/email to support each other. We also hold virtual pub meets, all sitting in our homes with our favourite tipple.

You are a good friend.

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

The longer we stay like this the bigger the issue on the other side. I feel we need to do what we can now in order to move things along quicker. We all have to make sacrifices- it’s just some aren’t willing to for their own reasons.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I am going to sound judgmental

I’m a nurse in the midst of this.

Scared to go to work.

Scared for what PPE I’m going to have that shift.

Scared that I may have my ID badge stolen - yes we staff are getting attacked in car parks for them

I’m dealing with neighbours flouting the rules every weekend with no care but are happy to justify their actions to anyone who will listen.

I am scared even more over this weekend as to what I have to put up with as well as go to work.

It’s is not acceptable to go and see anyone.

And it’s is not essential to be picking up a steam cleaner.

What is it that people are not understanding about these restrictions?

This is not a time for people to be stretching the restrictions to suit.

I may sound harsh but you know what fuck it.

Just stay the fuck at home unless it’s essential and this shit will be over sooner.

If anyone wants to take offence please feel free to come to work with me.

And for those that are trying to trivialise the deaths by staying they had and not died from it please bury your head in more sand and please stay the fuck at home while you are doing it.

And those who think it’s a hoax or a scam, hop over to the nearest Hospital and ask them to look at the procedures, strategies and redeployment.

A steam cleaner is now an essential journey, jesus it's getting even more stupid

It is when you need it to clean your fucking house. If she'd ordered it off amazon no one would have shit to say. This way she's not one of the millions that are ordering non essentials online putting delivery drivers at risk. She is picking it up from me with absolutely no contact and yes it is essential and definitely not stupid. Don't patronise me.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Lets shut that there I think

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