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when one part of the couple may not be cut out for the lifestyle

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By *ongtime lovers OP   Couple
over a year ago

Central

What are your thoughts?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

well then it shouldnt be a couple

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When we started we said we started as a couple and if at anytime one of us were uncomfortable with the lifestyle, that we would either figure out what we were okay with: for example soft swinging only or we'd stop all together. We did run across one couple where the male coaxed his female into playing an when she finally agreed he couldn't handle hearing her "enjoyment"... so she told me she'd play with me(female) because he was okay with that, later on he said he wanted to join in... Bit of a double edged sword don't ya think? cool people in this lifestyle, but not everyone is cut out for it.

I didn't think my man would be, but he's embraced it and loves it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What are your thoughts?"

I guess another valid question would be why aren't they cut out for it?

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By *ongtime lovers OP   Couple
over a year ago

Central

Just wondering...not an actual situation.

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By *ongtime lovers OP   Couple
over a year ago

Central

But like u say u made rules that if both parties didn't enjoy u would quit...so if one enjoyed the lifestyle but the other didn't...someone's gna still walk away and not be happy? (Just playing devil's advocate, its my nature. ..lol)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Just wondering...not an actual situation. "

Good discussion question though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ultimately a decision would have to be made what's more important. A high percentage of the time if one stays in this lifestyle and the other doesn't, it doesn't end well for the couple. And if one sneaks around, they will almost always get caught eventually.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This sounds like a communication problem where neither party is willing to listen to the other. I have always believed in the unity of a relationship. if one's not cut out for it the other ones not cut out for it, meanning the relationship is not cut out for it. what is more important in a relationship?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ultimately a decision would have to be made what's more important. A high percentage of the time if one stays in this lifestyle and the other doesn't, it doesn't end well for the couple. And if one sneaks around, they will almost always get caught eventually."

Totally agree

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By *razy-CplCouple
over a year ago

and surrounding areas

a lot is down to comunication as in people are afraid to say exactly how the feel and just go ahead to keep the other person happy. if ur in a serious relationship or a marraige u have to respect ur partners wishes or u will end up resenting ur partner for not wanting to do it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" a lot is down to comunication as in people are afraid to say exactly how the feel and just go ahead to keep the other person happy. if ur in a serious relationship or a marraige u have to respect ur partners wishes or u will end up resenting ur partner for not wanting to do it. "

We agree.

The fear thing we think is because people don't like to be judged.( we want to live up to our partners expectations.) In today's society a lot of judging goes on. You can witness right here in the forums. And releasing a truth about ourselves makes us vulnerable. There for people don't talk about it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" a lot is down to comunication as in people are afraid to say exactly how the feel and just go ahead to keep the other person happy. if ur in a serious relationship or a marraige u have to respect ur partners wishes or u will end up resenting ur partner for not wanting to do it.

We agree.

The fear thing we think is because people don't like to be judged.( we want to live up to our partners expectations.) In today's society a lot of judging goes on. You can witness right here in the forums. And releasing a truth about ourselves makes us vulnerable. There for people don't talk about it."

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