FabSwingers.com forum: Single ladies and couples...a little balance.

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

As a couple looking for a lady to play with, we understand this can be very daunting and an awful lot of stuff has to be right for it to work.

We have often seen threads from unicorns (not sure if we like that term) talking about how couples tend to see them as playthings or experiments. We are sure that happens and should not, but there is the other side.

We have met one lady for a social, all seemed well. Texts flowed after and there was a great build up. She was having some family problems and we offered to meet again if she needed a rant or just an ear, no pressure. Not heard a thing since but is always on here.

We're supposed to meet a lady weekend before last. All arranged, an hour before, pulls out due to a heavy cold. Absolutely no problem, these things happen and we were fine and thanked her for letting us know. Messaged her since....ghosted.

Absolutely fine if she didn't want to see us, but all we ask is just a little honesty and respect. I guess this goes for any meeting on Fab.

Rant over!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Welcome to Fab, completely normal behaviour for this site

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolutely. Bunch of time wasters. I've not found a single genuine person yet, there's always been something x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Frustrating after putting so much time and effort in and yes it’s not just single ladies that let the site down exactly the same behaviours happening from coupes and guys all the time.

Things are too easily agreed/planned when sitting behind a key board then the cold light of day dawns and bobs your uncle fannys your aunt the whole thing is just too much trouble or too scary

Classic lack of follow through from 95% on here I find verifications a good indication but still no guarantee

Socials and clubs always much better to meet the right person/persons imo

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Similar things have happened to us with single men and other couples.

We tend to only expect a meet to go ahead once we're all at the agreed location and have established that everything is ok.

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By *ooBoo2300Woman
over a year ago

Manchester

I will always have a social with someone first unless we are meeting in a club, I need to know I’m physically attracted to the person or couple and they aren’t weirdos. I get stood up for socials all the time. I’ve now found that those people with 10+ veris from meets are the ones who are more likely to turn up. They get it. I was always put off by someone with 100+ veris but now they seem like the best sought to look for!!

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By *angOnBunnyCouple
over a year ago

Ipswich

Can't see the point on organising a meet if you are not going to turn up. If we agree a meet, then mitigating circumstances only will alter that.

Not keen on a massive list of veris though, but certainly a good smattering of shows and valid veris are a must for us to consider things as our time is so limited for meets that once we organise we need to be sure. Last one was a man who arranged with us, went quiet and offline and then next day questioned why we were not happy with him. Go figure

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 05/02/20 16:02:28]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would never stand someone up or pull out of a meet at the last min unless completely neccisary. And would hope other would have the same respect

However it is scary... I can see how people get too nervous to go through with it x

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By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple

I think its pretty easy to moan at singles if you are in a couple. Imagine going for a meet alone especially as a female.

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By *carlettxWoman
over a year ago

Essex

"Welcome to Fab, completely normal behaviour for this site

Was going to say the same

Tbh it’s not just single ladies letting the said down so to say

I have been let down many times over the years by single guys and couples

Tbf this is why I have in the last couple years chosen to meet at a club - therefore still going to have a great social night ahead

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By *inkylovers09Couple
over a year ago

Hertfordshire

I (mrs) wouldn't let any lady down.

Maybe there a little embarrassed they let you down and then may think you dont think the genuine

just a thought

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By *inkylovers09Couple
over a year ago

Hertfordshire

Their*

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think its pretty easy to moan at singles if you are in a couple. Imagine going for a meet alone especially as a female."

Clearly didn't read our initial post.....that's exactly what we said.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Yeah, clubs are best. At least you know people there are there for a reason.

We are not knocking anybody. Totally understand cold feet, or even just changing your mind. Just better to be honest about it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Of course mitigating circumstances should be the only thing to prevent a meet. I had to pull out of an amazing meet 10mins before meeting as my roommate forgot his keys and needed rest for a interview with a bank the next day. Bro code comes first.

I stated my case, apologised, and took the consequences like a man.

If you pull out due to nerves or simply never intended to meet. You are a dickhead. Simple as.

But overall men, women and couples are guilty but that's just part and parcel of this site. We just have to live with it and strive towards being better.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

In no way trying to blame single ladies solely. Happens with all, as this thread proves.

Just seen a few threads saying how inconsiderate couples can be toward single ladies ......can happen the other way too!

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

Go to a club, they are there, they have a safe environment, they can see if they are attracted and they will come and find you.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Go to a club, they are there, they have a safe environment, they can see if they are attracted and they will come and find you."

Yeah, we need to do more clubs. Our area is pretty poor, nothing local. Normally means a night away, not cheap these day!

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By *inkycreamCouple
over a year ago

manchester

We’ve met a few in clubs some that was on here, they tread carefully on here. Once face to face in a club having a laugh ice is broken.

We rarely play same day with single girls it’s pushy and intimidating let everyone get comfy don’t forget there’s two of you one of them. Be nice they play twice or more give respect.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We’ve met a few in clubs some that was on here, they tread carefully on here. Once face to face in a club having a laugh ice is broken.

We rarely play same day with single girls it’s pushy and intimidating let everyone get comfy don’t forget there’s two of you one of them. Be nice they play twice or more give respect. "

Could you point out exactly where we have been disrespectful??

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By *inkycreamCouple
over a year ago

manchester

"We’ve met a few in clubs some that was on here, they tread carefully on here. Once face to face in a club having a laugh ice is broken.

We rarely play same day with single girls it’s pushy and intimidating let everyone get comfy don’t forget there’s two of you one of them. Be nice they play twice or more give respect.

Could you point out exactly where we have been disrespectful??"

Saying how we play it, not how you play

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By *inkycreamCouple
over a year ago

manchester

"We’ve met a few in clubs some that was on here, they tread carefully on here. Once face to face in a club having a laugh ice is broken.

We rarely play same day with single girls it’s pushy and intimidating let everyone get comfy don’t forget there’s two of you one of them. Be nice they play twice or more give respect.

Could you point out exactly where we have been disrespectful??

Saying how we play it, not how you play "

It sorry

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By *4tCouple
over a year ago

warrington

we have joined a KIK group, which includes single ladies, we get to meet as a group frequently. a great way to meet and befriend single ladies.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"we have joined a KIK group, which includes single ladies, we get to meet as a group frequently. a great way to meet and befriend single ladies."

Sounds a good idea. Maybe we will try to get one going. We are well aware it's not something that will just happen. There needs to be a lot of trust and respect built up before it goes further.

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