FabSwingers.com forum: Euphemisms

By *unkhouser72 OP Man
over a year ago

Gtr Manchester

Anyone got any sex related euphemisms? I've always found to leave .... with a face like a painters radio hilarious

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By *anther81Man
over a year ago

Drogheda

Looked like a badly packed kebab.

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By *zreal_rdgMan
over a year ago

Reading

As wet as an otters pocket

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By *mberWoman
over a year ago

Preston

A fanny like a bill poster's bucket.

Thank you Viz

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By *aughtycp1Couple
over a year ago

Leicestershire

Cleaning the cobwebs with the womb broom !

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By *unkhouser72 OP Man
over a year ago

Gtr Manchester

Drain the main vein

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It looks like a penis but smaller

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By *unkhouser72 OP Man
over a year ago

Gtr Manchester

Cock like a walnut whip

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By *ynetaurusMan
over a year ago

Newcastle

A fanny like Davy Crocketts hat

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By *ynetaurusMan
over a year ago

Newcastle

Situation....Fit girl in tight gym pants...Gotta a box like a monkeys forehead,

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By *ynetaurusMan
over a year ago

Newcastle

Had more cocks than John Waynes rifle

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By *unkhouser72 OP Man
over a year ago

Gtr Manchester

Had more pricks than a 2nd hand dartboard

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fanny like a ripped out fireplace.

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By *eeky goodnessMan
over a year ago

Worcester

Attacking the pink fortress

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I might as well have stuck it out the window and fucked the night.

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By *hloevtTV/TS
over a year ago

norwich

Dive into the kebab, hope there's no chilli sauce in it x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Her fanny looks like a punched lasagne!

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By *winfrozrMan
over a year ago

Carnoustie

Is the euphemism of knocking boots still used?

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By *unkhouser72 OP Man
over a year ago

Gtr Manchester

"Is the euphemism of knocking boots still used?"

Never heard that one

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By *picknspanMan
over a year ago

North West Leeds

Like throwing a sausage up the M62

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By *icky247TV/TS
over a year ago

Ruislip

Rogered more than a police radio!

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By *unkhouser72 OP Man
over a year ago

Gtr Manchester

"Rogered more than a police radio!"

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By *picknspanMan
over a year ago

North West Leeds

Bangs like a 5 bar gate in a storm

Got a dick like a baby's arm holding an orange

Had a face that looked like it had caught fire and had been put out with a baseball bat

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By *unkhouser72 OP Man
over a year ago

Gtr Manchester

A face like a bulldog licking piss off a nettle

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By *unkhouser72 OP Man
over a year ago

Gtr Manchester

"Like throwing a sausage up the M62"

Don't get this one ?

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

Has a look of a spider trap attracting open flies

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By *ain n MableWoman
over a year ago

Milton Keynes

When I finished with her, she looked like an overturned Milk float.

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By *unkhouser72 OP Man
over a year ago

Gtr Manchester

"When I finished with her, she looked like an overturned Milk float."

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By *heltenhamBiGuyMan
over a year ago

Cheltenham

She wanted a euphemism, so I gave her one

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By *unkhouser72 OP Man
over a year ago

Gtr Manchester

"She wanted a euphemism, so I gave her one"

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By *rof. Brian cocksMan
over a year ago

sheffield

I'm trying to think of one but it's sooo hard!

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By *angothreeMan
over a year ago

cramlington

Off to shake hands with the father of my children

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By *unkhouser72 OP Man
over a year ago

Gtr Manchester

He's so desperate he'd shag the crack of dawn / the door

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So desperate he,d fuck a barbers floor.

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By *ssexhamptonMan
over a year ago

Rayleigh

Have a game of hid the sausage is my favourite followed she looked like a Plasterer radio once I finished.

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By *ig_eric_tionMan
over a year ago

IPSWICH

Face like a slate hangers nail bag.

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By *voncouplexxCouple
over a year ago

Bristol

She was wet as a knackered fridge

Her fanny looked like a bear with its throat cut

Nipples like a blind cobbler's thumb

Arse like the mersey tunnel

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By *picknspanMan
over a year ago

North West Leeds

"Like throwing a sausage up the M62

Don't get this one ?"

The preposition that the lady has an expansive area that is as wide as a motorway and ones appendage a mere sausage in comparison

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Camel toe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh look,my two breast friends

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You should just watch Jimmy Carr's stand ups. Plenty of euphemisms.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Like throwing a sausage up the M62

Don't get this one ?

The preposition that the lady has an expansive area that is as wide as a motorway and ones appendage a mere sausage in comparison "

There’s one that originates from Sheffield that’s similar... “ it’s like throwing a carrot through the wicker arches “

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By *otsossieMan
over a year ago

Chesterfield

Or chucking a sausage down the Mersey tunnel.

I like “box of assorted creams”.

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By *heLaserGuyMan
over a year ago

Coventry

I'm not saying she was hairy but her cunt looked like a stab wound in a gorillas back

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By *heLaserGuyMan
over a year ago

Coventry

Her fanny resembled a deserted crows nest

Spike Milligan

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One I heard the other day

Wetter than Stephen Hawkings chin

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fanny like a wet rugby sock

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wetter than an otters pocket.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Loading the yogurt slinger

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cock snot up the fart pipe

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By *eith28Man
over a year ago

uxbridge

Fucked her so hard she went off like a bottle of milk in the Sahara.

Fucked her so hard the neighbours complained of the smell

C4nt like a wizards sleeve

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By *unkhouser72 OP Man
over a year ago

Gtr Manchester

"Like throwing a sausage up the M62

Don't get this one ?

The preposition that the lady has an expansive area that is as wide as a motorway and ones appendage a mere sausage in comparison "

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By *unkhouser72 OP Man
over a year ago

Gtr Manchester

Piss flaps like John Wayne's saddle bags

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By *herryblossom_BJWoman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire

"Cock like a walnut whip"

Jeez i can't imagine what that actually looks like in person

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By *herryblossom_BJWoman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire

"Fucked her so hard she went off like a bottle of milk in the Sahara.

Fucked her so hard the neighbours complained of the smell LOL LOL LOL

C4nt like a wizards sleeve"

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By *unkhouser72 OP Man
over a year ago

Gtr Manchester

"Cock like a walnut whip

Jeez i can't imagine what that actually looks like in person

Lucky you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The circus is off,the monkeys nose is bleeding.

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By *unkhouser72 OP Man
over a year ago

Gtr Manchester

Got the painters and decorators in

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Shame when people read ‘euphemisms about sex’ they understand it as ‘ways to insult women’s genitalia’. Probably a larger point there about society and language.

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By *rK MrsJCouple
over a year ago

Kidderminster

You don't look at the mantlepiece when your poking the fire.

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By *eeky goodnessMan
over a year ago

Worcester

She was wetter than a otters pocket!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wasn’t there a Private Eye euphemism about Ugandan relations?

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By *istyblue1967Man
over a year ago

manchester

shes seen more japs eyes than a tokyo optician

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By *unkhouser72 OP Man
over a year ago

Gtr Manchester

"shes seen more japs eyes than a tokyo optician "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Like throwing a sausage up the M62

Don't get this one ?

The preposition that the lady has an expansive area that is as wide as a motorway and ones appendage a mere sausage in comparison

There’s one that originates from Sheffield that’s similar... “ it’s like throwing a carrot through the wicker arches “ "

In London it would be "chucking a fag in the Albert Hall"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"shes seen more japs eyes than a tokyo optician "

Weeping laughing, ffs that's brilliant

made my night

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Or chucking a sausage down the Mersey tunnel.

I like “box of assorted creams”. "

Also "bill posters bucket"

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By *unkhouser72 OP Man
over a year ago

Gtr Manchester

"Shame when people read ‘euphemisms about sex’ they understand it as ‘ways to insult women’s genitalia’. Probably a larger point there about society and language."

Have you read the thread

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By *ain n MableWoman
over a year ago

Milton Keynes

She was so ugly the the Tide wouldn't even take her out.

I'm not saying she's a slag, but even the label in her knickers says NEXT

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By *onynickiCouple
over a year ago

Bournemouth

She’s a proper 1984!

Eh?

Looks 19 from the back, 84 from the front!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He had a face like a witch doctor's rattle.

He was so skinny he had to run around in the shower to get wet.

He was so bald he looked like his hair had been parted by Moses

He was so short I asked what time Snow White and the other six expected him back.

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By *ir-spunk-alotMan
over a year ago

Southern England

She is so good she could suck a football through a hosepipe.

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By *eah BabyCouple
over a year ago

Cheshire, Windermere ,Cumbria

That hard a cat couldn’t scratch it

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By *unkhouser72 OP Man
over a year ago

Gtr Manchester

"She was so ugly the the Tide wouldn't even take her out.

I'm not saying she's a slag, but even the label in her knickers says NEXT"

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By *ain n MableWoman
over a year ago

Milton Keynes

He had a face like a Jockey's bollocks.

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By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple

"Shame when people read ‘euphemisms about sex’ they understand it as ‘ways to insult women’s genitalia’. Probably a larger point there about society and language."

Glad you said it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A fanny like a bill poster's bucket.

Thank you Viz"

I love this one!

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By *accaandpearce99Couple
over a year ago

northampton

Bollocks like a turkey’s neck

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By *iss ScherzzoWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

Liverpool one - Got off at Edge Hill

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Liverpool one - Got off at Edge Hill "

Watford Junction in London

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He's so dense light has to bend round him.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

She had fanny like pulling apart a cold cheese toastie.

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By *iss ScherzzoWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"Liverpool one - Got off at Edge Hill

Watford Junction in London

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By *unkhouser72 OP Man
over a year ago

Gtr Manchester

"Shame when people read ‘euphemisms about sex’ they understand it as ‘ways to insult women’s genitalia’. Probably a larger point there about society and language.

Glad you said it "

I would see it more of a celebration of the idiosyncrasies of our wonderful and descriptive language, but hey im a glass half full kinda guy

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By *mberWoman
over a year ago

Preston

"A fanny like a bill poster's bucket.

Thank you Viz

I love this one! "

You mean me....or my euphemism?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A fanny like a bill poster's bucket.

Thank you Viz

I love this one!

You mean me....or my euphemism?

Well... as you asked

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By *pacecoastersCouple
over a year ago

Cocoa Beach

So ugly, when he was born, the Doctor turned around and slapped his mother.

So ugly as a boy, they had to tie a pork chop around his neck just to get the dog to play with him.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He was in there like a rat up a drain pipe!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

By the time I’d done with her she had a face like a Plaster’s radio

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By *mberWoman
over a year ago

Preston

"A fanny like a bill poster's bucket.

Thank you Viz

I love this one!

You mean me....or my euphemism?

Well... as you asked

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By *ain n MableWoman
over a year ago

Milton Keynes

"Shame when people read ‘euphemisms about sex’ they understand it as ‘ways to insult women’s genitalia’. Probably a larger point there about society and language."

Blimey, you must be a load of fun on a Saturday night?

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

"Shame when people read ‘euphemisms about sex’ they understand it as ‘ways to insult women’s genitalia’. Probably a larger point there about society and language."

It's just fun

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By *unkhouser72 OP Man
over a year ago

Gtr Manchester

"Shame when people read ‘euphemisms about sex’ they understand it as ‘ways to insult women’s genitalia’. Probably a larger point there about society and language.

Blimey, you must be a load of fun on a Saturday night?"

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By *ollycouple71Couple
over a year ago

manchester

Had more pricks then a dartboard

Up and down like a brasses knickers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Shame when people read ‘euphemisms about sex’ they understand it as ‘ways to insult women’s genitalia’. Probably a larger point there about society and language.

Blimey, you must be a load of fun on a Saturday night?"

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By *rotic-TouchTV/TS
over a year ago

doncaster

A face like a smacked twat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fanny like a skydiver’s mouth!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cock like a salted slug

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By *ollycouple71Couple
over a year ago

manchester

Had a face like a bulldog chewing a wasp

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By *rednwilma1Couple
over a year ago

york

Face like a welders bench !!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"She had fanny like pulling apart a cold cheese toastie."

Awww,I'll never eat a cheese toastie again without this thought!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fanny like a burst sofa

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"She had fanny like pulling apart a cold cheese toastie.

Awww,I'll never eat a cheese toastie again without this thought! "

Sorry

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

She’s had more cock ends than weekends

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By *rotic-TouchTV/TS
over a year ago

doncaster

Sucks like a Dyson

Lol

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By *rotic-TouchTV/TS
over a year ago

doncaster

A small step for man

A leap for mankind

Lol

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By *iamond coupleCouple
over a year ago

leeds

Had a face like a bulldog licking stale piss off a thistle

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By *ir-spunk-alotMan
over a year ago

Southern England

She has had more pricks than a dart board.

He has had more tarts than Mr Kipling.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Face like a bag of smashed crabs.

Shes had enough cock to put a handrail around the Southwest Coast path.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

She was dripping like a F##ked fridge

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By *iscreetfuncpl12Couple
over a year ago

Somerset

Shakespeare was at it long before Viz, though to be fair, not as funny, with- Making the beast with two backs. A tad pretentious, so I will add - knee deep in clunge - from a classic Inbetweeners episode.

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By *unkhouser72 OP Man
over a year ago

Gtr Manchester

"Had a face like a bulldog licking stale piss off a thistle"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

“Punched lasagne” and “otters pocket“ for vaginas make me giggle

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