FabSwingers.com forum: How to politely say not attracted?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

When you’re chatting and someone sends you a face pic, what’s the nicest way to say you don’t find them attractive?

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By *epsonWoman
over a year ago

Biddulph

Thank you for sharing, but I would not be looking to meet you, Sorry

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good luck.. not for me.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Yes, we like that one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is so awkward this situation, it is a reason I insist on face pics in their very first message. So I can politely ignore upfront rather than have initial contact with face pic coming after. Might make things easier for you if you take same approach

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

just be honest, say they are not for you, they wont take offence

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Yes, and I guess that would screen some of the fakers too.

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

Just be honest and thank them for the email and photos but they are not what you are looking for

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By *ilkenWoman
over a year ago

Manchester

No point being subtle people just keep pestering just say you are not attracted you have to be direct here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ah, so is my 'Bog off!' a bit too forward them? X x

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By *ikkicdukTV/TS
over a year ago

Liverpool

sorry not really what I'm looking for, happy fabbing xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

thank you but not for me/us but wish you look any effort to respond and say hello and no thanks at least considering amount of messages women/couples get its much appreciated

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

You don't need to tell people you don't find them attractive. Just say politely that you won't be taking things any further.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve had this exact situation this evening, told the guy that I wasn’t attracted to him and got the reply “don’t judge a book by its cover”

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You look so much like my dad. I’m so sorry but cannot go any further.

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

"You look so much like my dad. I’m so sorry but cannot go any further. "

I have used that one

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

I always say thanks but no thanks,happy swinging.

Usually i get a thanks for replying

Occasionally had "shame " or similar

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By *rmrs1234Couple
over a year ago

Waterford

i usually say sorry you wouldnt be my type. happy fabbing.

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By *m3232Man
over a year ago

maidenhead

Sorry not what I am looking for is fine.

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By *onderstuff73mMan
over a year ago

Brum

"When you’re chatting and someone sends you a face pic, what’s the nicest way to say you don’t find them attractive?"

I’ve learnt from the majority of women I’ve messaged...all you need to do is block and delete.

Why be polite and talk to someone?

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"sorry not really what I'm looking for, happy fabbing xxx"

This. People need to realise not everyone will fancy them and be secure enough to accept that gracefully.

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

"When you’re chatting and someone sends you a face pic, what’s the nicest way to say you don’t find them attractive?"

Just say not my type Thankyou

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I personally prefer to be ignored than be told I am not someones type. No answer is an answer

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just send a face pic initially I’m not going to be attracted to a cock or fanny haha!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just send a face pic initially I’m not going to be attracted to a cock or fanny haha! "
nice fanny by the way lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Most polite is being honest.

Most effective may be to block? To save you future communication either way?

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By *AYENCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

As others have said, insist on a face pic with their first message - a lot harder to turn them down once a rapport has been established. Saves a lot of time too.

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By *nnocentimesMan
over a year ago

over there by that tree

Sorry, but not for me.

I hope you find what your looking for.

Tends to be my stock “no” response,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"just be honest, say they are not for you, they wont take offence"

They won't take offence? Sometimes they are so offended even u couldn't believe. They start make a questions, so who is attractive to you, what is your type, etc.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We just got called stuck up for saying ‘sorry, not our usual type’

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"just be honest, say they are not for you, they wont take offence

They won't take offence? Sometimes they are so offended even u couldn't believe. They start make a questions, so who is attractive to you, what is your type, etc."

Yes! I get so much abusive. One guy messaged me 5 times, I politely declined him and got back that I was a ‘ugly nasty slag cunt’ nice one

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By *B69Woman
over a year ago

Wiltshire

I either delete or if we had some communication then I say sorry your not for me, hope you find what your looking for x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry...but not what I'm looking for..good luck though!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When you’re chatting and someone sends you a face pic, what’s the nicest way to say you don’t find them attractive?"

"Vomit" emoji....?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Male half here. I learnt not to judge a book by it's cover long ago.

I for example would not have sex with someone I didn't find attractive but on one occasion I gave someone the benefit of the doubt because I found we got on in many other ways. The sex so happened to be the best I have ever experienced.

I usually am interested in slim girls but this girl was curvy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The problem with sending face pics with first message is for all we know there is every chance they are a pic collector. So our advice is go with your gut instinct.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not for me"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When you’re chatting and someone sends you a face pic, what’s the nicest way to say you don’t find them attractive?"

Fuck off minger.

Kidding

Thank you but no thanks.

Or, apologies but not my cup of tea.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Be nice just to get a reply so that’s a bonus ????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thanks for your interest but for me it's a no. Then block. Polite but clear.

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By *urler36Man
over a year ago

Graigue

If met one or 2 women here but for the most part dry few reply which I find bad manners

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By *irty PrettyWoman
over a year ago

Cardiff

"just be honest, say they are not for you, they wont take offence

They won't take offence? Sometimes they are so offended even u couldn't believe. They start make a questions, so who is attractive to you, what is your type, etc."

Oh tell me about it!

“Meet me and I’ll show you I’m your type”

“So what is your type?”

“Well you met him (one of my veris) and I’m better”

“You need to try every kind of guy”

“Meet me anyway”

“You never know til you try”

And on and on and on. Sometimes it’s just less stressful to not reply in the first place.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"just be honest, say they are not for you, they wont take offence

They won't take offence? Sometimes they are so offended even u couldn't believe. They start make a questions, so who is attractive to you, what is your type, etc.

Oh tell me about it!

“Meet me and I’ll show you I’m your type”

“So what is your type?”

“Well you met him (one of my veris) and I’m better”

“You need to try every kind of guy”

“Meet me anyway”

“You never know til you try”

And on and on and on. Sometimes it’s just less stressful to not reply in the first place.

Just reeks of desperation - I do feel sorry for them but it also makes me kinda mad

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By *entlecaressMan
over a year ago

Wakefield/ Beverley

Honestly and openly is the only with respectful language

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When you’re chatting and someone sends you a face pic, what’s the nicest way to say you don’t find them attractive?"
really sorry not for me.......... simples

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By *irty PrettyWoman
over a year ago

Cardiff

"just be honest, say they are not for you, they wont take offence

They won't take offence? Sometimes they are so offended even u couldn't believe. They start make a questions, so who is attractive to you, what is your type, etc.

Oh tell me about it!

“Meet me and I’ll show you I’m your type”

“So what is your type?”

“Well you met him (one of my veris) and I’m better”

“You need to try every kind of guy”

“Meet me anyway”

“You never know til you try”

And on and on and on. Sometimes it’s just less stressful to not reply in the first place.

Just reeks of desperation - I do feel sorry for them but it also makes me kinda mad "

The one that really annoys me is “so what is your type?” Why, because you’re somehow magically turn into it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your not what I'm lookimg for right now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

not tonight Josephine

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By *punkyMcFuckKnuckleMan
over a year ago

Glasvegas/Kilmarnock

No monsters! Beautiful people can pass but monsters.... No. Your face... urgh...offends my mirror (proceed to show them small mirror)

Thank you Mr Paul Whitehouse

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By *reya73Woman
over a year ago

Whitley Bay

Just straight up, honest, kind and

Respectful eg ..

Thank you but no thank you.

Thanks for the pic, i hope its ok to say we are not suited. Best wishes.

Sorry but you're not what I'm looking for right now.

Thank you, I'm not attracted to you in a sexual way.

I'm not feeling to take it further with you. Wishing you well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

thanks but no thanks

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By *ong_John2333Man
over a year ago

Birmingham

"Just straight up, honest, kind and

Respectful eg ..

Thank you but no thank you.

Thanks for the pic, i hope its ok to say we are not suited. Best wishes.

Sorry but you're not what I'm looking for right now.

Thank you, I'm not attracted to you in a sexual way.

I'm not feeling to take it further with you. Wishing you well.

Sound advice Id say... I find it is better than no reply because at least the other person knows where they stand

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By *oomsMan
over a year ago

London

I think either a no reply/delete message or a polite ‘thanks but no thanks’ is fine, if people get het up by that they that it’s their issue.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just say thanks but not what I'm looking for.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just say thanks but not what I'm looking for.

"
i said that........ minds think great alike

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

Ask if a cow stud on you at birth?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ask if a cow stud on you at birth?"
pat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank you but you're not what I'm looking for...I use it and I'm not offended when it's said to me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

bogof

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By *rettyLittleThingWoman
over a year ago

Swansea

Sorry you're not my type doesn't work with most.

I've had a guy message me several times and create different accounts to ask me to change my mind :/

I mean sometimes it's not physical attraction, its the way someone acts and they can't get their head around why can't they "start fresh".

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By *ancardiff7Man
over a year ago

Near Cowbridge

I've been informed that I'm not their type a couple of times. Fair enough, there's a finite range of people who are attracted to each other.

I've always appreciated them letting me know.

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By *oomsMan
over a year ago

London

That’s why it’s prob best to do ignore I reckon, some people think that if you reply yours trying to start a convo.

It’s subjective though obviously, if their approach was really nice, and they seem sound, obv a polite KB reply might be better.

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By *attb179Man
over a year ago

London

"Sorry you're not my type doesn't work with most.

I've had a guy message me several times and create different accounts to ask me to change my mind :/

I mean sometimes it's not physical attraction, its the way someone acts and they can't get their head around why can't they "start fresh". "

This can be quite frustrating for a guy. As you say it can be looks or the vibe/connection just doesn't attract you. The latter is can sometimes be dependant on small initial factors as to how you came across. So there's often a feeling of 'I can change it'.

A guy has to learn that if a woman isn't attracted, for whatever reason, just move on. You might persist and build a connection or friendship but it will only ever be in the friendzone.

I personally prefer a 'thanks but not for me' which obviously means I don't find you attractive, rather than being ignored or worse engaging in some form of flirting and only revealing it as things get more real!

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By *reeneggsandsamMan
over a year ago

Perpignan and cap

Gwaaann!

Gwaaaannnn fuck your self!

Too blunt?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry, you're not what I'm looking for" works perfectly for me. I'd rather there was some form of attraction from the get go.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not for us I’m afraid. We hope you find what you’re looking for though x

I refuse to say sorry for not being attracted to a person.

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By *oneyjule65Couple
over a year ago

Halifax

I just block, harsh I know but saves time, as usually if I say not interested etc it tends to lead to them asking why etc. So a block is a clear indication I am not interested...

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By *ara JTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol East

"You don't need to tell people you don't find them attractive. Just say politely that you won't be taking things any further. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When you’re chatting and someone sends you a face pic, what’s the nicest way to say you don’t find them attractive?"

I've said no attraction sorry.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can't understand why some members on these type of threads, aren't bold in PM messages, like they are in the forums lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I think a firm and polite ‘no thanks’ seems to be the consensus of opinion followed by block and delete.

Thanks

xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think a firm and polite ‘no thanks’ seems to be the consensus of opinion followed by block and delete.

Thanks

xxx"

Honesty is key

... and you are welcome x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just say thank you but not for me.

If they start with the begging messages afterwards it's a block

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank you for the message, however, we are not a match.

Have fun and play safe.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I guess the best question to ask is what sort of reply would you like OP?

I imagine it would be something like thanking you for contacting them but they not not want to take things further and wish you well on the site? There's no real need to give a reason as it just opens a can of worms.

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By *ogostick72Man
over a year ago

Scotland

A polite no thanks and hope you find what your looking for

When I've been turned down the replies have been similar to the above, to which i reply thanks for the message, no problem and good luck

No need to be nasty unless they keep pestering you then I would block them

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By *etite_delightWoman
over a year ago

BunnyLand

"When you’re chatting and someone sends you a face pic, what’s the nicest way to say you don’t find them attractive?"

Thank you for sharing, I’m sorry to say that I won’t be interested to meet best of luck x x

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By *ondonexplorerMan
over a year ago

Ascot

"I'm intimidated by your hotness. I reckon I'll blow my bolt before you've got your blouse undone, so I think you should find someone more your equal for a satisfying meet".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep...after few messages I've got today I'll start block them straight away...I'm kind and understanding and just get abusive bullshit talking. Thx guys.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Good luck.. you’re gonna need it, looking like that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honestly policy, if we’re not attracted to someone we say “thank you for your interest in us but sorry to say there isn’t an attraction match , we wish you happy swinging “

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

I tend to say “Thank you but sorry you’re not my type”.

Block once they start asking why or complaining.

I figure I’ve made it clear in my profile what I fancy

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By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

And it does my head in if anyone says “Good luck”. Fab isn’t about luck.

And it sounds like you’re desperate. “Oh my I do hope there’s a man that wants to shag me, Hope I get lucky

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And it does my head in if anyone says “Good luck”. Fab isn’t about luck.

And it sounds like you’re desperate. “Oh my I do hope there’s a man that wants to shag me, Hope I get lucky

Happy fabbing is my go to.

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