FabSwingers.com forum: Why do some woman put themselves down with body description

By *mibo123 OP Man
over a year ago

chorley ish

I have seen some profiles on here from single females and they say things mum tum or jelly belly and everything heading south...

I personally like a woman with a real body I honestly find a real woman's body attractive and mum tum,saggy bits, and scared tissue (stretch marks) are all part of a real woman

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

"I have seen some profiles on here from single females and they say things mum tum or jelly belly and everything heading south...

I personally like a woman with a real body I honestly find a real woman's body attractive and mum tum,saggy bits, and scared tissue (stretch marks) are all part of a real woman"

It's a self-defence mechanism.

Say it about yourself, before someone else puts you down..

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By *radleywigginsMan
over a year ago

northwest

If they say they’re fat first they think it’ll stop guys mentioning that they’re fat when they reject them?

Is that self-defence??

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

"If they say they’re fat first they think it’ll stop guys mentioning that they’re fat when they reject them?

Is that self-defence?? "

Self-preservation, in a society where perfect body image is shoved down your throat.

And if someone is mean & abusive when you have rejected them, then reject was the right choice..

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By *radleywigginsMan
over a year ago

northwest

"If they say they’re fat first they think it’ll stop guys mentioning that they’re fat when they reject them?

Is that self-defence??

Self-preservation, in a society where perfect body image is shoved down your throat.

And if someone is mean & abusive when you have rejected them, then reject was the right choice.."

Quite right!

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By *rmrs1234Couple
over a year ago

Waterford

Define a "real woman"

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By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple

I tell people I have a wobbly bits, I like to be clear.

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By *radleywigginsMan
over a year ago

northwest

"I have seen some profiles on here from single females and they say things mum tum or jelly belly and everything heading south...

I personally like a woman with a real body I honestly find a real woman's body attractive and mum tum,saggy bits, and scared tissue (stretch marks) are all part of a real woman"

These are often the profiles which state.. ‘do not message unless you’re hench’ or ‘only looking for body-builder types’ or, ‘I’m a size queen, 10 inch minimum’ or..

Only on fab, eh.

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By *incsladyandscotsmanCouple
over a year ago

North fife

Because I have had a man meet me a few years back on a singles profile, and then message after saying I was bigger than he expected from pictures..

So I make it clear I am not slim to avoid dissapoitment and embarrassment.

I do not hate my body, however I can't say that I 'like' my stomach.

L x

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By *mibo123 OP Man
over a year ago

chorley ish

"Define a "real woman""

A real woman is just what it says really

Someone who isn't fake someone that is natural

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have seen some profiles on here from single females and they say things mum tum or jelly belly and everything heading south...

I personally like a woman with a real body I honestly find a real woman's body attractive and mum tum,saggy bits, and scared tissue (stretch marks) are all part of a real woman"

They like to get compliments from guys telling them they have a lovely body. And real woman??? Really? Give your head a wobble! Ffs. Real women come in all shapes and sizes you muppet!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Because I have had a man meet me a few years back on a singles profile, and then message after saying I was bigger than he expected from pictures..

So I make it clear I am not slim to avoid dissapoitment and embarrassment.

I do not hate my body, however I can't say that I 'like' my stomach.

L x"

Honest pictures prior to meeting solves that problem.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I tell people I am fat, so they know, I am but don't look particularly large in my pics. I am fine with it but others might not be

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Define a "real woman""
breathing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I tell people I am fat, so they know, I am but don't look particularly large in my pics. I am fine with it but others might not be"

I am not putting myself down though

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By *exy4youxxWoman
over a year ago

Pontefract

"I have seen some profiles on here from single females and they say things mum tum or jelly belly and everything heading south...

I personally like a woman with a real body I honestly find a real woman's body attractive and mum tum,saggy bits, and scared tissue (stretch marks) are all part of a real woman

They like to get compliments from guys telling them they have a lovely body. And real woman??? Really? Give your head a wobble! Ffs. Real women come in all shapes and sizes you muppet!"

Your last bit really made me giggle well said xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have seen some profiles on here from single females and they say things mum tum or jelly belly and everything heading south...

I personally like a woman with a real body I honestly find a real woman's body attractive and mum tum,saggy bits, and scared tissue (stretch marks) are all part of a real woman"

What’s a “real woman’s “ body? I used to run and work out and was toned and had muscle definition, I’m now a size 14 and wobbly am I now a real woman. Absolute codswollaple,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I want someone to not just look at pics but know what i am like before they meet me.

I want someone who likes the curvy figure and all that comes with it, it is nothing to do with being insecure as I sure as hell am not, more to do with making sure the other person wants that, because if you do not like mums tums and wobbles, I am not for you.

As for us still demanding a sexy guy, just because we are not slim and perfect does not mean we cannot still choose who we want to have sex with lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have seen some profiles on here from single females and they say things mum tum or jelly belly and everything heading south...

I personally like a woman with a real body I honestly find a real woman's body attractive and mum tum,saggy bits, and scared tissue (stretch marks) are all part of a real woman

What’s a “real woman’s “ body? I used to run and work out and was toned and had muscle definition, I’m now a size 14 and wobbly am I now a real woman. Absolute codswollaple,"
exactly whatever that means

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have seen some profiles on here from single females and they say things mum tum or jelly belly and everything heading south...

I personally like a woman with a real body I honestly find a real woman's body attractive and mum tum,saggy bits, and scared tissue (stretch marks) are all part of a real woman

What’s a “real woman’s “ body? I used to run and work out and was toned and had muscle definition, I’m now a size 14 and wobbly am I now a real woman. Absolute codswollaple,exactly whatever that means

It means I’m a “woman” same face same f**ny same personality, I’m just softer and a little big bigger. Fooking boils my piss posts like this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Probably because if they say average or slim etc you get tools messaging to say you are not average or slim and insult.

I had fabulous but someone said you’re body is more fat so put it back to average to stop the drama

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So many women are lacking in confidence and feel the pressure of trying to match up to the medias portrayal of the female image

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Because if you're confident in your appearance you'll be abused for it

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I like curves and wobbly bits on a lady, they are feminine features in my eyes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Probably because if they say average or slim etc you get tools messaging to say you are not average or slim and insult.

I had fabulous but someone said you’re body is more fat so put it back to average to stop the drama

I tell them my body is awesome. If they don't agree there's no requirement for them to fuck me. Insults are wasted when directed my way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Because if you're confident in your appearance you'll be abused for it"

True story.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Probably because if they say average or slim etc you get tools messaging to say you are not average or slim and insult.

I had fabulous but someone said you’re body is more fat so put it back to average to stop the drama

I tell them my body is awesome. If they don't agree there's no requirement for them to fuck me. Insults are wasted when directed my way. "

I like how you think and use the site

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

I just don't want to disapoint anyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have seen some profiles on here from single females and they say things mum tum or jelly belly and everything heading south...

I personally like a woman with a real body I honestly find a real woman's body attractive and mum tum,saggy bits, and scared tissue (stretch marks) are all part of a real woman

It's a self-defence mechanism.

Say it about yourself, before someone else puts you down.."

I’m guilty of this , lack of confidence for me xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Always better to understate and over deliver, to be fair women could describe themselves as a bus crash gone wrong and some blokes would still be gagging to get them.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"I just don't want to disapoint anyone."
show us ya blibbers

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By *incsladyandscotsmanCouple
over a year ago

North fife

Honest pictures prior to meeting solves that problem.

Wow Ouch.. My pictures are honest and not altered in anyway, I just prefer to get 'the best angle' hardly going to post a picture of my stomach if I don't like it am I..

My friends only pictures have more on show but I shouldn't have to show full frontal when I clearly state what size I am and that I'm not slim.

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By *yx_InannaWoman
over a year ago

Burslem

I tell people about my body so they know what to expect, the camera doesn't show the scars well

So many say they are fine with saggy tits and scars till up close and personal and avoid touching them as if they'd catch something. Which spoils the mood for me, honesty is important but when it comes to people seeing you in the flesh it's a whole different story and what they thought wouldn't bother them actually does.

On fab it's a lot about people treating you worse than other people with what society ranks high as beauty. Being fat, ugly, scarred, marked, and flawed they seem to think you deserve less respect and start to treat you differently which proves to be a good tactic to try and avoid such people.

Describing yourself to others gives that person a choice and also you can find out what really matters to them when it comes to sexual partners. But it isn't fool proof.

Some guys just want anyone to empty their balls and leave forgetting mutual pleasures and they don't care what you look like you're a means to an end and these are the most difficult people to avoid.

It isn't self depreciation but honesty. It's up to the other person what they value most

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Always better to understate and over deliver, to be fair women could describe themselves as a bus crash gone wrong and some blokes would still be gagging to get them."

I have found, over the years, that generally women understate and men overstate. I wonder which gender has it right?

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By *eovilcouple76Couple
over a year ago

yeovil

"I have seen some profiles on here from single females and they say things mum tum or jelly belly and everything heading south...

I personally like a woman with a real body I honestly find a real woman's body attractive and mum tum,saggy bits, and scared tissue (stretch marks) are all part of a real woman

It's a self-defence mechanism.

Say it about yourself, before someone else puts you down..

I’m guilty of this , lack of confidence for me xx"

Couldn’t agree more xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have seen some profiles on here from single females and they say things mum tum or jelly belly and everything heading south...

I personally like a woman with a real body I honestly find a real woman's body attractive and mum tum,saggy bits, and scared tissue (stretch marks) are all part of a real woman

It's a self-defence mechanism.

Say it about yourself, before someone else puts you down.."

This for sure I always say in my messages that I'm good at hiding the unsightly bits or the bits I'm not a fan of myself I don't really put myself down I've had 4 kids and am proud of the marks I have because of them but I like to make sure they are known about

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just like to be clear of my body. It definitely jiggles a lot more than the average haha!! X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honest pictures prior to meeting solves that problem.

Wow Ouch.. My pictures are honest and not altered in anyway, I just prefer to get 'the best angle' hardly going to post a picture of my stomach if I don't like it am I..

My friends only pictures have more on show but I shouldn't have to show full frontal when I clearly state what size I am and that I'm not slim.

I'm just saying honest with those you're meeting that's all. Sorry if that offended you.

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By *egs11ABCWoman
over a year ago

Aberdeen

"Because I have had a man meet me a few years back on a singles profile, and then message after saying I was bigger than he expected from pictures..

So I make it clear I am not slim to avoid dissapoitment and embarrassment.

I do not hate my body, however I can't say that I 'like' my stomach.

L x"

Iv had that as well. Dont see the point in being personal . "Didnt feel am attraction " or "ur not my type" wd suffice x

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

I like real bodies too, unless you are extremely genetically lucky, a perfect body just means your priorities and values are wrong. I also like women who are confident and don't put themselves down and can accept compliments. It’s a shame so many girls feel the need to conform to other people’s expectations

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By *incsladyandscotsmanCouple
over a year ago

North fife

I'm just saying honest with those you're meeting that's all. Sorry if that offended you. "

I was honest as I could have been, we played on video call on kik and I sent plenty of pictures.

The guy was just an ass.. Knocked my confidence and has made it so out profile contains disclaimers on my body.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I like real bodies too, unless you are extremely genetically lucky, a perfect body just means your priorities and values are wrong. I also like women who are confident and don't put themselves down and can accept compliments. It’s a shame so many girls feel the need to conform to other people’s expectations "

Yet your comment about people with nice bodies having their priorities and values wrong is ok?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm just saying honest with those you're meeting that's all. Sorry if that offended you.

I was honest as I could have been, we played on video call on kik and I sent plenty of pictures.

The guy was just an ass.. Knocked my confidence and has made it so out profile contains disclaimers on my body.

Well then you've no need to even give it a second thought.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a hard time with anyone putting themselves down. It's easy to fall into language that is derogatory to oneself.

If we talk about ourselves poorly, we allow others to do so also.

However I have no issue with describing myself as fat as I am beautifully blessed with fleshy abundance. Fat, jiggly, curvy, ample, rubenesque do not have to be derogatory terms.

Sadly society tells us only a certain body type is attractive for both men and women. Society and the media lie!

Post the "fat" photos as well as the well posed ones. Let people know your beauty and decide from there xx

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Yet your comment about people with nice bodies having their priorities and values wrong is ok? "

Perfect not nice bodies, it’s my opinion, they are too obsessed about appearance

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By *toC Thats MeWoman
over a year ago

Sheffield

It’s just an honest approach I think.

One minute you are been told that your curves are great, then the next minute your a fat slut for deleting their message.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yet your comment about people with nice bodies having their priorities and values wrong is ok?

Perfect not nice bodies, it’s my opinion, they are too obsessed about appearance"

Ok. Nice generalizing there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have seen some profiles on here from single females and they say things mum tum or jelly belly and everything heading south...

I personally like a woman with a real body I honestly find a real woman's body attractive and mum tum,saggy bits, and scared tissue (stretch marks) are all part of a real woman

It's a self-defence mechanism.

Say it about yourself, before someone else puts you down.."

Exactly this

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By *inful xWoman
over a year ago

In a sleepy little village

I make it perfectly clear in any conversation exactly what my body is like. I'd hate to disappoint anyone if they met me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I make it perfectly clear in any conversation exactly what my body is like. I'd hate to disappoint anyone if they met me

Well don't then. Provide honest pics. It's not difficult!

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By *uenevereWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

My profile states my clothing size that I have a belly and includes honest photos.

I am not putting myself down, I am very comfortable in myself, but think it's important to be honest.

I have some professional photos on as well, which give a less accurate, but much sexier, picture of my physique.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

From looking at the thread it seems it's because people aren't being honest with their pics. They feel the need to put themselves down for whatever reason.

No wonder guys struggle.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Probably because if they say average or slim etc you get tools messaging to say you are not average or slim and insult.

I had fabulous but someone said you’re body is more fat so put it back to average to stop the drama

I tell them my body is awesome. If they don't agree there's no requirement for them to fuck me. Insults are wasted when directed my way. "

Wow, it is!

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By *inful xWoman
over a year ago

In a sleepy little village

"I make it perfectly clear in any conversation exactly what my body is like. I'd hate to disappoint anyone if they met me

Well don't then. Provide honest pics. It's not difficult!"

They are all honest thanks very much

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I make it perfectly clear in any conversation exactly what my body is like. I'd hate to disappoint anyone if they met me

Well don't then. Provide honest pics. It's not difficult!

They are all honest thanks very much

Then why would you disappoint anyone? I don't get it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ha - I did exactly this this afternoon to a guy whilst arranging to meet....

Apologised in advance and hoped he wouldn’t be disappointed when we meet next week.

He had met some stunning women with amazing figures and I kind of already think I’m not gonna measure up!!

So, I agree with some previous comment that it is definitely a self preservation mechanism and for me, I’d rather get the insult in first!!

Mrs G xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have seen some profiles on here from single females and they say things mum tum or jelly belly and everything heading south...

I personally like a woman with a real body I honestly find a real woman's body attractive and mum tum,saggy bits, and scared tissue (stretch marks) are all part of a real woman"

Some (not all) women put themselves down so men will play the white night in shining armor.

If they describe themselves as fat they want men to contact them and say you're not fat.

I have seen lots of women describe themselves as BBW and they are not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have seen some profiles on here from single females and they say things mum tum or jelly belly and everything heading south...

I personally like a woman with a real body I honestly find a real woman's body attractive and mum tum,saggy bits, and scared tissue (stretch marks) are all part of a real woman"

Does a slim woman not have a real body?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Because if you're confident in your appearance you'll be abused for it"

Yup. I constantly get people going out of their way to message me telling I'm not as hot as I think I am

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By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple

"Because if you're confident in your appearance you'll be abused for it

Yup. I constantly get people going out of their way to message me telling I'm not as hot as I think I am "

You are smoking hot. Ms

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honest photos arent always flattering photos.

I’m a curvy lady but i like photos of me that show my better assets not my belly or my arm flab. If im planning on meeting someone and getting naked with them then they may see more ‘natural’ photos jelly belly and all. But for the sake of fab i’d prefer more flattering pictures up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have seen some profiles on here from single females and they say things mum tum or jelly belly and everything heading south...

I personally like a woman with a real body I honestly find a real woman's body attractive and mum tum,saggy bits, and scared tissue (stretch marks) are all part of a real woman

Some (not all) women put themselves down so men will play the white night in shining armor.

If they describe themselves as fat they want men to contact them and say you're not fat.

I have seen lots of women describe themselves as BBW and they are not. "

Surly not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it's pretty obvious that it's down to the pictures. Men are visual. They see a picture and fill out the rest in their heads, you mention wobbly bits, they assume you're talking about your boobs. Regardless of what you say, you are just messing with his mental picture of you.

Before he comes to meet you he's probably rehearsed screwing his mental version of you several times in his head. Then you turn up and you aren't exactly what he pictured.

This is also one of the reasons for no shows, the honest pictures don't get sent until right before the meet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

some women never understand that they are attractive in many ways

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By *oxychicWoman
over a year ago

Nottinghamshire

"Because I have had a man meet me a few years back on a singles profile, and then message after saying I was bigger than he expected from pictures..

So I make it clear I am not slim to avoid dissapoitment and embarrassment.

I do not hate my body, however I can't say that I 'like' my stomach.

L x"

Exactly this I had a man say your never a size ten erm hang on never stated I was plus if my pics look like I'm a size 10 u need spec savers was my answer so I do state now I'm the same with my stomach to

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"I have seen some profiles on here from single females and they say things mum tum or jelly belly and everything heading south...

I personally like a woman with a real body I honestly find a real woman's body attractive and mum tum,saggy bits, and scared tissue (stretch marks) are all part of a real woman"

Real woman?!! What's that then?

As for women who put themselves down? Usually attention seekers who want to be told they're gorgeous or those lacking in confidence who always put themselves down.

Either way I think "drama!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I want someone to not just look at pics but know what i am like before they meet me.

As for us still demanding a sexy guy, just because we are not slim and perfect does not mean we cannot still choose who we want to have sex with lol"

Spot on!!

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By *restonM50Man
over a year ago

preston

Are people ever truly happy with there bodies?

Some concentrate on the negatives because that us what they see.

When ladies put themselves down, when they appear to accept themselves, or when they love their bodies , there will always be some idiot to put them down.

Accept what the ladies see in themselves be happy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My photos aren’t edited, all natural but you can’t really see the stretch marks in them. So I’m brutally honest in the profile description. I’d rather be honest then let any pictures be deceiving. I like to make sure both parties are attracted to one another. It’s only fare really. Then if they don’t like me it’s no big deal.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I look like shit in pictures but im way more better looking in real life lol.. My confidence now is light years ahead of what it was 20 years ago, and I looked great back then.. Ha.. It's just acceptance and learning to love who you are, and that shines through and over any perceived shortcomings usually.. Get on and enjoy yer body..

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By *iss LovelyWoman
over a year ago

Here and There

I have a physical description of myself on my profile that mentions my jelly belly, amongst other things. It’s not to pre-empt an insult or because I’m ashamed of my body or anything like that. I talk about all of my bits to paint a picture.

I don’t arrange meets off here, I meet new people at parties only, so the pictures I post here aren’t an advert. I’m not auditioning for a meet via this profile. Whatever I post is for my enjoyment. I like posting pics that I think look sexy and I like them being appreciated by others. That probably makes me shallow

I’ve never had anyone say that I don’t look like my pictures, but I don’t think it matters what you look like or how hard you try to be transparent, there will always someone who has a different picture of you in their head, no matter how you describe yourself. But that’s their problem I think.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Am sure most females get the same but when a male messages and says things like...

“Omg your amazing”

“Wow your perfect”

“Your my ideal woman”

“Holy fuck your hot”

My reply is instantly “am not all that”

Sometimes you can tell what kind of female is behind the profile when there telling you straight they’ve got wobbly bits.. stretch marks.. things pointing south... we accept ourselves for what we are... we’re not necessarily putting ourselves down just staying true to ourselves...

Wether we’re a size 6 or double even triple that we know we’re beautiful regardless or at least we should all know that anyway

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honest pictures prior to meeting solves that problem.

Wow Ouch.. My pictures are honest and not altered in anyway, I just prefer to get 'the best angle' hardly going to post a picture of my stomach if I don't like it am I..

My friends only pictures have more on show but I shouldn't have to show full frontal when I clearly state what size I am and that I'm not slim.

Well said. Would anyone post a pic they don't like? Doubt it, and your profile clearly states everything, problem is people don't read profiles.

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