FabSwingers.com forum: You know you're getting old when...

By *innie The Minx OP Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

Buying a lime green clothes airer in Dunelm fills you with glee...

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By *ikilovesCCouple
over a year ago

village life, closest main town inverness

"Buying a lime green clothes airer in Dunelm fills you with glee...

Oooh that sounds handy, is it in the sales

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You have to increase the text size on your phone, sob..

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

Ooh I'm gonna get one of those, and the wee circle thing with pegs on that you can hang on the line for your knickers, I've always wanted one of them.

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

You have to get brighter light bulbs

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By *exfordMan
over a year ago

discombobulated land

"Buying a lime green clothes airer in Dunelm fills you with glee...

You click on a thread only to forget what the thread was about Anyway, I'd say it's about 34 degrees C in Dubai at the moment. Hope this helps and have a great time!!!!!

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By *iker boy 69Man
over a year ago

midlands

Youre outside the age range of most profiles you look at on here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Youre outside the age range of most profiles you look at on here"

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By *innie The Minx OP Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"Buying a lime green clothes airer in Dunelm fills you with glee...

Oooh that sounds handy, is it in the sales

Yes, whoop!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Youre outside the age range of most profiles you look at on here"

Surely not!!! You’re certainly not outside of my age range. Just a shame you’re so far away.

Perhaps you know you’re getting old when you are interested in people who think they are getting old?!?

Anna xxx

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By *nto My ArmsMan
over a year ago

Herts/London

I was watching the news the other day and wondered why a woman had painted a second set of eyebrows onto her forehead. Wondered if it was some fashion statement I'd missed.

Then later, there it was again on another woman.

It wasn't until I put my specs on that I worked it out

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By *aul DeUther-OneMan
over a year ago

Sussex

Even the retired sports players who are now TV pundits are younger then you.

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

Your watching porn and all you think about is how comfy the bed looks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Youre outside the age range of most profiles you look at on here"

You beat me to it!!

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By *m A FuckerMan
over a year ago

kingswood,surrey/leysdown kent

you actually enjoy daytime tele

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Your watching porn and all you think about is how comfy the bed looks

"
hmmm don't buy it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you take your bra off and your tits bruise your toes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

...when you see police officers and school teachers that look about 15!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your eldest kid says..

"Dad isnt it weird to think ill be 18 in less than 2 years!"

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By *erry bull1Man
over a year ago

doncaster

When your dreams are dry

And your farts wet

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By *ourayloversCouple
over a year ago

chesterfield

When you groan when you get up from the sofa

When you see young woman out in town and think "she needs a coat on or she'll get a chill"

When you look forward to naps

When you prefer a bar/pub where you can have a conversation

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By *uzz And WoodyCouple
over a year ago

Maidstone

"Your eldest kid says..

"Dad isnt it weird to think ill be 18 in less than 2 years!"

Even worse when your eldest is over 18 and you have to be mindful of bumping into their friends whenever you go out so need to be on best behaviour!

Lou x

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By *innie The Minx OP Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"you take your bra off and your tits bruise your toes

I prefer to bruise other people's

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By *winfrozrMan
over a year ago

Carnoustie

"Youre outside the age range of most profiles you look at on here"

This is the worst

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Your eldest kid says..

"Dad isnt it weird to think ill be 18 in less than 2 years!"

Even worse when your eldest is over 18 and you have to be mindful of bumping into their friends whenever you go out so need to be on best behaviour!

Lou x "

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By *iker boy 69Man
over a year ago

midlands

"Youre outside the age range of most profiles you look at on here

This is the worst"

Youre ok at moment, not hit 41, when a lot of profiles say 40 haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"you take your bra off and your tits bruise your toes

I prefer to bruise other people's

"
please feel free to bruise mine

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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

You looked outside on Christmas Day and commented that there were no kids on new bikes, not like years ago! Because they’re all doing bloody PlayStation or Xbox

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By *xperimentalistMan
over a year ago

East Yorkshire

"you take your bra off and your tits bruise your toes

I prefer to bruise other people's

Putting on my steel toe caps

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The grandkids come round and tell you the tv is really loud

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

You shop around to save 20p

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When you groan when you get up from the sofa

When you see young woman out in town and think "she needs a coat on or she'll get a chill"

When you look forward to naps

When you prefer a bar/pub where you can have a conversation "

This is so right on the button!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When five days of playing needs five days recovery time

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By *nsatiablegreeneyesCouple
over a year ago

Portsmouth

All the radio 1 DJs I listened to when younger are now on Radio 2

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By *isstinseltoesWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

You have to scroll for ages to find your year of birth online.

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By *udistnorthantsMan
over a year ago

Desborough

When you prefer to keep your car in Comfort mode rather than Sport mode.

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By *sfleurWoman
over a year ago

wednesfield

You groan getting out of bed ..... alone

& shoes are in the comfy zone :0

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By *inky and the brain 1Couple
over a year ago

near Halesowen

Recently replaced a hoover, we were more excited than we should of been and knew at that moment, we are getting old .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Prefer tea to a beer

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By *iker boy 69Man
over a year ago

midlands

"Prefer tea to a beer "

Or a glass of when you ger in from work

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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago

Peterborough

When fancying a GILF is no longer a fetish.

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By *innie The Minx OP Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"You shop around to save 20p "

That really made me laugh

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By *uck-RogersMan
over a year ago

Tarka trail

On a cold night, when your teeth don't chatter anymore. Then you realise that they are in a glass beside the bed.

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By *RnMrsFreakCouple
over a year ago

Hull,England

when your grandkids are starting high school this year... gulp

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By *innie The Minx OP Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"you actually enjoy daytime tele

Homes Under The Hammer

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By *arkus1812Man
over a year ago

Lifes departure lounge NN9 Northamptonshire East not West MidlandsMidlands

When you still use a road atlas instead of a sat nav.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When your children are approaching middle age.

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By *apascouseMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

When you make a noise sitting down

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

When the new Saturday girl in the hairdressers asks if you have retired

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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago

leeds

"Buying a lime green clothes airer in Dunelm fills you with glee...

When half the guys under 35 on fab want to fuck you just because you're a "mature woman"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...when you see police officers and school teachers that look about 15!"

And when picking up the kids from school you realise you are the only one picking up Grandchildren

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Buying a lime green clothes airer in Dunelm fills you with glee...

When half the guys under 35 on fab want to fuck you just because you're a "mature woman""

Lovin this thread

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By *ifty69Man
over a year ago

north tyneside

"You have to increase the text size on your phone, sob.."
me

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"When you groan when you get up from the sofa

When you see young woman out in town and think "she needs a coat on or she'll get a chill"

When you look forward to naps

When you prefer a bar/pub where you can have a conversation "

Jesus I'm old at 27

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You know your getting old when you have to take half a viagra to stop yourself pissing on your shoes!!

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By *he Happy ManMan
over a year ago

Merseyside

You have a belly button between your breasts

When you take your underwear off your balls are between your knees.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Buying a lime green clothes airer in Dunelm fills you with glee...

When half the guys under 35 on fab want to fuck you just because you're a "mature woman""

But we Love a mature women

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By *innie The Minx OP Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"When the new Saturday girl in the hairdressers asks if you have retired"

Love it!

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By *tace 309TV/TS
over a year ago

durham

"You shop around to save 20p "
20p....i shop around to save 5p xxxx

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By *tace 309TV/TS
over a year ago

durham

It don't make, me old though. I'm just super frugal

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By *inkycreamCouple
over a year ago

manchester

When you get out of the jacuzzi and ya balls hang down further than they should

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By *abrina59TV/TS
over a year ago

moved to cuckold land

You see young women in their tower high heels and get jealous lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you pay cash for your groceries

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By *istress CockneyWoman
over a year ago

LONDON

When your lifelong search for a full size sandwich toaster if finally achieved. Result.x

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By *hebritukCouple
over a year ago

London

When someone gives up their seat on the bus for you and says, “here you are love”.

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By *itnkatCouple
over a year ago

in lincs between lincoln grantham boston

"When you groan when you get up from the sofa

Omg yep that's us and it's the rating 20s tomorrow

When you see young woman out in town and think "she needs a coat on or she'll get a chill"

When you look forward to naps

When you prefer a bar/pub where you can have a conversation "

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By *orny IrishMan
over a year ago

Rural Wiltshire

Yiu explain to someone famous who you met then realise they where not born when that event happened.

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By *innie The Minx OP Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"When you groan when you get up from the sofa

When you see young woman out in town and think "she needs a coat on or she'll get a chill"

When you look forward to naps

When you prefer a bar/pub where you can have a conversation "

Naps are the best

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By *ifty grades of shadyCouple
over a year ago

Carisbrooke, Isle of Wight

"Youre outside the age range of most profiles you look at on here

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By *innie The Minx OP Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

[Removed by poster at 31/12/19 20:12:11]

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By *innie The Minx OP Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"When someone gives up their seat on the bus for you and says, “here you are love”.

Not happened...yet...

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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

When people are out partying and you're staying in and watching Alan Carr

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By *rmrs1234Couple
over a year ago

Waterford

buying new sheets for your bed gets you all excited and then you fret youre going to mess them up when you get into bed

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By *atelotmanMan
over a year ago

Chatham

"Buying a lime green clothes airer in Dunelm fills you with glee...

Oooh that sounds handy, is it in the sales

I was going to ask the same question...I need a new one

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By *hav02Man
over a year ago

Glasgow/London

When you know a response to the OP question....

I'll get back to you in a few years

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When your in PJ's by 9pm on NYE and REALLY happy about it.

When your doctor, dentist ,police etc .. look like they're about 14

When every time you bend down to pick something up you cant do it in silence

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By *attb179Man
over a year ago

London

"You have to scroll for ages to find your year of birth online. "

This made me laugh more than it should have

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By *innie The Minx OP Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"When you know a response to the OP question....

I'll get back to you in a few years

Kids these days

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When every time you bend down to pick something up you cant do it in silence

THIS! Haha xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"you take your bra off and your tits bruise your toes

That happens to you too?

Just kidding

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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago

Durham

You have to temporarily halt a hot fucking session because you've got cramp!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"you take your bra off and your tits bruise your toes

That happens to you too?

Just kidding

About me I mean, not you

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By *attb179Man
over a year ago

London

You find yourself saying the same things to your kids your dad said to you,even though you've been trying not to for so long.

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By *ihimbiherCouple
over a year ago

lightwater

When you can no longer find your cock

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By *innie The Minx OP Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

When a good cup of tea is your drink of choice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you have a pic in your gallery wearing wellies

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By *uzzy NavelWoman
over a year ago

so near and yet so far....

"You have to increase the text size on your phone, sob.."

This...

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By *innie The Minx OP Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"You have to increase the text size on your phone, sob..

This...

I was genuinely happy when I discovered I could do this!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When your delight at a hot summer's day is because it makes drying your laundry easier.

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By *attb179Man
over a year ago

London

"When your delight at a hot summer's day is because it makes drying your laundry easier. "

Are you my mum??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When your delight at a hot summer's day is because it makes drying your laundry easier.

Are you my mum??

We were planning on telling you when you're older.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Buying a lime green clothes airer in Dunelm fills you with glee...

You click on a thread only to forget what the thread was about Anyway, I'd say it's about 34 degrees C in Dubai at the moment. Hope this helps and have a great time!!!!!"

You're broadcasting 34° heat on a thread where the thought of the upcoming menopause may be quite common.

Tact man, tact!

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

When you need loads of sex just in case you croak it with out your allocated lot.

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By *innie The Minx OP Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"When your delight at a hot summer's day is because it makes drying your laundry easier.

Are you my mum??

We were planning on telling you when you're older."

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By *anejohnkent6263Couple
over a year ago

canterbury

The noises u make getting out of bed are the same as the ones you used to make in bed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you get excited about a trip to B&Q

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By *innie The Minx OP Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"When you get excited about a trip to B&Q"

Or Wilco

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By *uck-RogersMan
over a year ago

Tarka trail

"When you get excited about a trip to B&Q

Or Wilco

"
Nah B&Q I get disount on Wednesday.

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By *izardsMan
over a year ago

meadows

When your apprentice says his parents are your age

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When your apprentice says his parents are your age

You say the praise back when when I was a boy/girl and then think omg I sound like my mum/dad

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

when your 4 years off 30

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By *izardsMan
over a year ago

meadows

When i see a bottle of mad dog 20/20

I feel really old lol

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By *xpanding our horizonsCouple
over a year ago

East Anglia

"Your eldest kid says..

"Dad isnt it weird to think ill be 18 in less than 2 years!"

When your youngest just turned 18, you needed to increase the font size on here to read the thread and you really wanted to know what was wrong with that woman's eyebrows.

I'm 43!

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By *izardsMan
over a year ago

meadows

I know I'm old.. over the last few years I've started wearing coats out on the lash, not just a trusty old shirt for the walk of shame these days

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You have to get brighter light bulbs

No, that's because energy efficient ones are crap.

Mind you, more recent LED ones seem to be a lot better

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When the barber offers to trim your fucking eyebrows!

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By *izardsMan
over a year ago

meadows

"When the barber offers to trim your fucking eyebrows!"

And ears

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By *heekyDannyMan
over a year ago

North West

When you can remember seeing something on 'Dave' the first time around....

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By *attb179Man
over a year ago

London

"When your delight at a hot summer's day is because it makes drying your laundry easier.

Are you my mum??

We were planning on telling you when you're older."

Always wondered why I look nothing like my parents. All starting to make sense now!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you make that 'ughh' noise as you get up

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales

You have a proper sesh before sleep & get woken up by searing lower back pain!

Probably a muscle, awake since 4am

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When your lifelong search for a full size sandwich toaster if finally achieved. Result.x"

Tell me more!

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By *athan 123Man
over a year ago

rochdale oldham border

When you try to send message to someone and your not in ther age range

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you think about living by the seaside

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By * and M lookingCouple
over a year ago

Worcester

Edinburgh Woollen Mills looks inviting

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

"Ooh I'm gonna get one of those, and the wee circle thing with pegs on that you can hang on the line for your knickers, I've always wanted one of them."

A socktopus

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By * and M lookingCouple
over a year ago

Worcester

It takes you a week to recover from a good night out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It takes you a week to recover from a good night out

I wish I recovered that quickly!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

.... you're constantly asked to be mother in mother/son role play. Mind you I should be thankful it's not Grandma yet I suppose...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 02/01/20 10:33:16]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

".... you're constantly asked to be mother in mother/son role play. Mind you I should be thankful it's not Grandma yet I suppose...

Tbf though this roleplay would suit down to the ground a man 20 years your junior, which given your preferences is rather win-win for you!

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By *host63Man
over a year ago

Bedfont Feltham

Tour outside more people age range on fab

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By *athan 123Man
over a year ago

rochdale oldham border

You know your getting older when you make a noise when getting up or sitting down or putty the corn flakes in the fridge

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By *empsey and hotpieceMan
over a year ago

North west

"Buying a lime green clothes airer in Dunelm fills you with glee...

You think that’s bad?

Our toilet seat got damaged over Xmas and I spent at least 2 hours reading screwfix reviews before I went and bought a new one. I fitted it, tried it out and then stood there proudly opening and shutting the soft close lid, so pleased with myself

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you cannot walk past a toilet without using it as you never know where the next one will be

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By *W_RedMan
over a year ago

Manchester

When you have to enter your date of birth online and you have to spin them years back like it's wheel of fucking fortune!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you go upstairs to get something then forget what you went for....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When my first orgasm is when who ever is fucking me takes my thigh high stilettos off. ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 02/01/20 16:56:07]

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By *ampshirehotwifeWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire

I can relate to so many comments already.

The biggest one for me though is being out of people's age ranges

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When your halfway through typing something and you forget to fini

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By *aul DeUther-OneMan
over a year ago

Sussex

You've got at least two pairs of glasses... somewhere...

Aaahh, there's one pair I've been looking for, on my head!

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By *ovegames42Man
over a year ago

london

"You have to scroll for ages to find your year of birth online. "

This PMSL

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By *ovegames42Man
over a year ago

london

"You've got at least two pairs of glasses... somewhere...

Aaahh, there's one pair I've been looking for, on my head!"

Or you need glasses to find your glasses

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By *innie The Minx OP Woman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"Buying a lime green clothes airer in Dunelm fills you with glee...

You think that’s bad?

Hahaha I like your style

A robust toilet seat is a thing of joy

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By * and M lookingCouple
over a year ago

Worcester

"When your halfway through typing something and you forget to fini"
sh it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Youre outside the age range of most profiles you look at on here"
that sucks alot

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By *andt1995Couple
over a year ago

London

"When your dreams are dry

And your farts wet "

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By *orny IrishMan
over a year ago

Rural Wiltshire

"Buying a lime green clothes airer in Dunelm fills you with glee...

You think that’s bad?

I did something similar on my toilet lid.

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