FabSwingers.com forum: NSA

By *uHorny1 OP Man
over a year ago

Cannock

Just wondering what people's thoughts are on the definition of NSA are. Chatted to a woman recently and she asked what I was looking for. Part of my response was that I was looking for NSA fun.

She clearly took this to mean that I was just after a fuck and nothing else, so she replied that she wasn't interested in that.

I wasnt going to play the desperate guy and plead with her.

However, my interpretation of the term NSA means that I'm not looking for any kind of long term relationship - a form of reassurance. I like to think that I've become good friends with everyone I've met via Fab. Clubs are obviously a different matter but I still enjoy the social interaction as well as playing.

So, what's your take on NSA?

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By *ove3funCouple
over a year ago

Cheltenham

Maybe she is looking for long term relationship and that is why she wasn't interested, rather than it being your misuse of NSA term

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By *ng1983Couple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon tyne

Perhaps she is looking for a regular fwb and interpreted your nsa as just a one off?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

NSA to me means disloyal

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By *uHorny1 OP Man
over a year ago

Cannock

"Maybe she is looking for long term relationship and that is why she wasn't interested, rather than it being your misuse of NSA term"

Possibly- no hint of that in her profile though. But her reply gave me the impression she thought I just wanted to turn up, fuck and go, which was very much not the case.

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By *uHorny1 OP Man
over a year ago

Cannock

"NSA to me means disloyal "

I can see why you might think that.

Was looking for a short phrase that means that "I'd love to meet and hopefully have fun, but don't worry- I'm not looking for a long term relationship and won't be trying to become a big part of your life."

Difficult to say that

Anyway, we can't see in the future- you might meet someone once and that's enough for one or both of you. I think disloyal is a bit strong.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"NSA to me means disloyal

I can see why you might think that.

Difficult to say that

Anyway, we can't see in the future- you might meet someone once and that's enough for one or both of you. I think disloyal is a bit strong."

I'm just looking for my life partner mate, nothing wrong with wanting NSA.

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By *AYENCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

NSA = fuck and go, no intentions to meet again.

FB = As above but on an occasional or regular basis.

FWB = might include meals, movies and Majorca, won't include meeting the mother, mopping floors or mowing the lawn.

I'm sure everyone will have a slightly different idea, but that would be ours.

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By *uHorny1 OP Man
over a year ago

Cannock

"NSA = fuck and go, no intentions to meet again.

FB = As above but on an occasional or regular basis.

FWB = might include meals, movies and Majorca, won't include meeting the mother, mopping floors or mowing the lawn.

I'm sure everyone will have a slightly different idea, but that would be ours."

I agree with a lot of that. Pretty much a progressive scale, but personally I'd put Fuck and Go right at the bottom- but not necessarily entry level! For me NSA is a starting point- no expectations but of things go well, progress to FB stage.

However, it's useful to know. Thanks. I shan't be using NSA in my messages from now on (unless it's clear that is what they're looking for!)

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By *ohohoWoman
over a year ago

Up North

"NSA = fuck and go, no intentions to meet again.

FB = As above but on an occasional or regular basis.

FWB = might include meals, movies and Majorca, won't include meeting the mother, mopping floors or mowing the lawn.

I'm sure everyone will have a slightly different idea, but that would be ours."

. I found some moved from one category to another. I initially thought having a fwb was what I wanted. It wasn’t. I actually preferred NSA. Less hassle and more focus on the fun.

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By *uHorny1 OP Man
over a year ago

Cannock

I think it's fair to say that all of my meets started as NSA but with one exception, have moved to either FB or FWB status.

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By *AYENCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

"NSA = fuck and go, no intentions to meet again.

FB = As above but on an occasional or regular basis.

FWB = might include meals, movies and Majorca, won't include meeting the mother, mopping floors or mowing the lawn.

I'm sure everyone will have a slightly different idea, but that would be ours.

. I found some moved from one category to another. I initially thought having a fwb was what I wanted. It wasn’t. I actually preferred NSA. Less hassle and more focus on the fun. "

Yeah I get that, and must admit Niki seems to be thinking more along the same lines.

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By *attb179Man
over a year ago

London

"NSA = fuck and go, no intentions to meet again.

FB = As above but on an occasional or regular basis.

FWB = might include meals, movies and Majorca, won't include meeting the mother, mopping floors or mowing the lawn.

I'm sure everyone will have a slightly different idea, but that would be ours.

. I found some moved from one category to another. I initially thought having a fwb was what I wanted. It wasn’t. I actually preferred NSA. Less hassle and more focus on the fun. "

Theres this and every shade in between depending on what you're looking for and how it works to connect to any particular person.

Not all that simple to hit the sweet spot

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By *uHorny1 OP Man
over a year ago

Cannock

"NSA = fuck and go, no intentions to meet again.

FB = As above but on an occasional or regular basis.

FWB = might include meals, movies and Majorca, won't include meeting the mother, mopping floors or mowing the lawn.

I'm sure everyone will have a slightly different idea, but that would be ours.

. I found some moved from one category to another. I initially thought having a fwb was what I wanted. It wasn’t. I actually preferred NSA. Less hassle and more focus on the fun.

Theres this and every shade in between depending on what you're looking for and how it works to connect to any particular person.

Not all that simple to hit the sweet spot "

Yes I know. There are no hard and fast rules. You can't please everyone!

It's not a worry for me - just something I thought worthwhile discussing.

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By *attb179Man
over a year ago

London

"NSA = fuck and go, no intentions to meet again.

FB = As above but on an occasional or regular basis.

FWB = might include meals, movies and Majorca, won't include meeting the mother, mopping floors or mowing the lawn.

I'm sure everyone will have a slightly different idea, but that would be ours.

. I found some moved from one category to another. I initially thought having a fwb was what I wanted. It wasn’t. I actually preferred NSA. Less hassle and more focus on the fun.

Theres this and every shade in between depending on what you're looking for and how it works to connect to any particular person.

Not all that simple to hit the sweet spot

Yes I know. There are no hard and fast rules. You can't please everyone!

It's not a worry for me - just something I thought worthwhile discussing."

Definitely a topic worth discussing

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By *eviantdeeliteCouple
over a year ago

Cheltenham

"Maybe she is looking for long term relationship and that is why she wasn't interested, rather than it being your misuse of NSA term

Possibly- no hint of that in her profile though. But her reply gave me the impression she thought I just wanted to turn up, fuck and go, which was very much not the case. "

Well then why did you not say that and explain instead of lazily just saying NSA....women and men have different ideas.....you just need to communicate better so there can be no ambiguity

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By *eviantdeeliteCouple
over a year ago

Cheltenham

"NSA to me means disloyal

I can see why you might think that.

Difficult to say that

Anyway, we can't see in the future- you might meet someone once and that's enough for one or both of you. I think disloyal is a bit strong."

You have just said it, so make the effort and say it again next time lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In my experience it usually means " Im after a quick shag, while the wife's at her mums"

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By *uHorny1 OP Man
over a year ago

Cannock

"NSA to me means disloyal

I can see why you might think that.

Difficult to say that

Anyway, we can't see in the future- you might meet someone once and that's enough for one or both of you. I think disloyal is a bit strong.

You have just said it, so make the effort and say it again next time lol

It was part of a message that already had 3 paragraphs in it, so I dont think it was lazy. After all, being lazy is using a cut and paste message that is impersonal and doesn't take account of the recipient's profile. Which isn't what I did. But I didn't think that they'd want to read a War and Peace length epic.

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By *edVelveteenCouple
over a year ago

Heaven in the Midlands

"NSA = fuck and go, no intentions to meet again.

FB = As above but on an occasional or regular basis.

FWB = might include meals, movies and Majorca, won't include meeting the mother, mopping floors or mowing the lawn.

I'm sure everyone will have a slightly different idea, but that would be ours."

This is interesting. Never thought about it before.

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By *uHorny1 OP Man
over a year ago

Cannock

"In my experience it usually means " Im after a quick shag, while the wife's at her mums""

Good succinct comment.

Not what I'm doing at all, so will bear that in mind. Thank you x

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By *attb179Man
over a year ago

London

"In my experience it usually means " Im after a quick shag, while the wife's at her mums""

Want some nsa?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In my experience it usually means " Im after a quick shag, while the wife's at her mums"

Good succinct comment.

Not what I'm doing at all, so will bear that in mind. Thank you x"

I didnt say you were

I said thats my experience

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By *uHorny1 OP Man
over a year ago

Cannock

"In my experience it usually means " Im after a quick shag, while the wife's at her mums"

Good succinct comment.

Not what I'm doing at all, so will bear that in mind. Thank you x

I didnt say you were

I said thats my experience"

Ih I realise that, but if that's your first thought, it may well have been hers. Which is not the impression I want to make. So it's me that needs to bear that in mind. I was genuinely grateful for your comment!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In my experience it usually means " Im after a quick shag, while the wife's at her mums""

Wow really

For me it’s because I don’t want you just coming round when you feel like it or wondering where I am or who I’m meeting

In an ideal world I’d prefer fwb

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do like this topic, it’s opened my eyes just a little wider, thanks op

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By *uHorny1 OP Man
over a year ago

Cannock

"I do like this topic, it’s opened my eyes just a little wider, thanks op "

Thanks!

Genuinely chuffed by that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In my experience it usually means " Im after a quick shag, while the wife's at her mums"

Want some nsa?

No thanks

Grown men that stick their tongue out at me, for no apparent reason, really dont do it for me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just wondering what people's thoughts are on the definition of NSA are. Chatted to a woman recently and she asked what I was looking for. Part of my response was that I was looking for NSA fun.

She clearly took this to mean that I was just after a fuck and nothing else, so she replied that she wasn't interested in that.

I wasnt going to play the desperate guy and plead with her.

So, what's your take on NSA?

======================================

Agreed, 100%. "NSA for me too, means that I'm not looking for any kind of long term relationship". I'm polyamorous and my ideal sexual partners are polyamorous too. Whether for 121 or MMF, I'm completely honest and upfront in saying that I'm in Swinging for exciting sex with 100% polyamorous independently-minded partners.

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By *attb179Man
over a year ago

London

"In my experience it usually means " Im after a quick shag, while the wife's at her mums"

Want some nsa?

No thanks

Grown men that stick their tongue out at me, for no apparent reason, really dont do it for me"

Damn, imagine what life could have been like if I'd have chosen the right emoji!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

NSA to me means sex and nothing else. Not even friendship. Friends with benefits is a whole other thing (and probably why it has its own separate name)

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By *iggyStarjumpsMan
over a year ago

Stockport

Interesting topic, I'd not thought about this before but will keep it in mind. Thanks OP

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By *uHorny1 OP Man
over a year ago

Cannock

"Interesting topic, I'd not thought about this before but will keep it in mind. Thanks OP"

Cheers

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

Surely if you say NSA you are just after sex (not necessarily just a fuck)

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By *uHorny1 OP Man
over a year ago

Cannock

"Surely if you say NSA you are just after sex (not necessarily just a fuck)"

Personally, no. But that's the interpretation that some seem to have.

My definition is that its a starting point- if we decide that after one meet, that's enough, then we go our separate ways. Ultimately, most first meets are like this,unless it's been made clear that a relationship is what's wanted.

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