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Replying to messages

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

No, this isn't another single guy rant about not getting replies...

Does anyone else sometimes put off replying to, or even reading, messages because they just can't face dealing with them? On the rare occasions when I get a message, I often find myself stalling, often for days, before responding. Sometimes I won't even read it for a day or more if the snippet I can see from the inbox looks like it won't be pleasant reading.

It's like my social anxiety has spread to online messages.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales


"No, this isn't another single guy rant about not getting replies...

Does anyone else sometimes put off replying to, or even reading, messages because they just can't face dealing with them? On the rare occasions when I get a message, I often find myself stalling, often for days, before responding. Sometimes I won't even read it for a day or more if the snippet I can see from the inbox looks like it won't be pleasant reading.

It's like my social anxiety has spread to online messages."

Sometimes. Usually when I’m a bit jaded with things (as now). The effort it takes to be upbeat or positive when you don’t particularly feel it makes it feel a bit overwhelming, so I tend to hide my profile, but I still get my regular chatters who message.

Do you hide your profile? That may cut down on the messages and make you feel less pressured. If you know it’s an unpleasant message can you not just delete straightaway? The trouble is, if it’s a nice message and you leave it a few days (particularly unread) you’ll have folk thinking you’re not interested - and you might miss out on something good.

Or maybe a “hi, busy right now but will reply in a few days” might just suffice?

I do wish we had an auto response button that we could self edit at times.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep.

I'm dreadful at reading and responding at times. If I'm drained I know I won't give it the attention or care it deserves.

P

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am bad for this. Apologies to anyone who has messaged me, I'm having a bad time and struggling with life a bit. Hopefully it'll pass.

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By *lirty CocktailsCouple
over a year ago

merseyside

im probably the opposite, no matter what the messages work, personal, friends or on here i need to reply straight away.... thing ive got an issue ha ha or it will niggle at me that i have left someone holding on for a reply

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

Yes I get you, sometimes I just don't have the energy or will to be interesting or engaging in messages, or I worry that I won't be, or they won't be, so I don't bother replying. I'll take note of the ones from friends or people I might like the look of, but then i forget to go back to them. I've probably missed a lot of cracking opportunities because of that.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"No, this isn't another single guy rant about not getting replies...

Does anyone else sometimes put off replying to, or even reading, messages because they just can't face dealing with them? On the rare occasions when I get a message, I often find myself stalling, often for days, before responding. Sometimes I won't even read it for a day or more if the snippet I can see from the inbox looks like it won't be pleasant reading.

It's like my social anxiety has spread to online messages.

Sometimes. Usually when I’m a bit jaded with things (as now). The effort it takes to be upbeat or positive when you don’t particularly feel it makes it feel a bit overwhelming, so I tend to hide my profile, but I still get my regular chatters who message.

Do you hide your profile? That may cut down on the messages and make you feel less pressured. If you know it’s an unpleasant message can you not just delete straightaway? The trouble is, if it’s a nice message and you leave it a few days (particularly unread) you’ll have folk thinking you’re not interested - and you might miss out on something good.

Or maybe a “hi, busy right now but will reply in a few days” might just suffice?

I do wish we had an auto response button that we could self edit at times.

"

Believe me, it's not the volume of messages causing a problem If I get one a day it's a good day, I think most I've ever had unread is three. I just baulk at reading them, or replying.

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