FabSwingers.com mobile

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to Swingers Chat

Ghosting

Jump to newest
 

By *ighwayman04 OP   Man
over a year ago

Rhyl or warrington

Anyone else have a problem (m or f) with this lately? It seems to be happening more and more.

Was chatting to someone for a couple of weeks, swapped numbers and traded pics etc. Arranged to meet last Sunday and on the Saturday morning I found I was blocked on everything with zero explanation. Just find it a bit odd/rude and wasting my precious time .

I think it’s about time something is brought in to highlight this. Basically the opposite to veris but in a negative way to avoid it happening.

Comments please

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hezuMan
over a year ago

London

If it takes couple weeks of chatting to setup a meet I think that's the problem

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

It's not a problem I've had (yet) but I know it happens. It can't be very nice but just learn from it and move on. I don't think we can have a negative verification system, as people lie.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Totally agree with you on that we met a lad a few times said we wanted to make it a regular thing said was totally up for that then we got blocked x there loss doe x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ghosting is a truly horrible thing and actually is when someone you're in an emotional physical relationship with suddenly, without explanation, ceases all contact ... absolutely emotionally destroying. Not when an online stranger changes their mind and stops contact!

Think it's just a part of online contact with strangers really ... though very bad manners

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ighwayman04 OP   Man
over a year ago

Rhyl or warrington


"Ghosting is a truly horrible thing and actually is when someone you're in an emotional physical relationship with suddenly, without explanation, ceases all contact ... absolutely emotionally destroying. Not when an online stranger changes their mind and stops contact!

Think it's just a part of online contact with strangers really ... though very bad manners "

Very bad manners indeed. I mean just say. I had even got a night night babe the night before. All very odd to me.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ighwayman04 OP   Man
over a year ago

Rhyl or warrington

Yeah fair enough. That’s the issue isn’t it.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex

It's happened to us a few times. No idea how you can prevent it because the ability to leave negative comments or feedback on a profile will always be abused. We never expect anyone to turn up until we're actually face to face with them

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *etite HandfulWoman
over a year ago

Chester

Sounds like you want people forced to play with you because you swapped numbers to me.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ilsaGeorgeCouple
over a year ago

kent

We’ve had this recently. Last September we met a lady on here. Clicked straight away, so quickly that we never even connected on the site as friends or verified each other.

This lady transcended a Fab connection and became a real friend to us for almost a year. She became a part of our real world lives and a genuine, close friend with a little extra intimacy.

After about 9 months we began to notice that the pleasantries and intimacies that had quickly defined our friendship for so many months began to change. We were worried about her, but she maintained that nothing was wrong, until the coldness she was imposing became unavoidable.

Since then we have been ghosted. The last communication we had was when we invited her to meet for a coffee. She succinctly declined the invite and then didn’t respond to any further messages. We sent an email, which has been ignored. After almost a year of very close friendship, this abrupt dismissal has been confusing and hurtful. We still don’t really understand why.

The experience has made us feel foolish and cheap, like for the best part of a year she simply used us until she got bored or found someone better. She clearly has her reasons, but she never respected us enough to be honest about them.

Right now we don’t know if she’s moved house, if she’s alive or dead. She hasn’t posted anything to Instagram (she has two accounts but we were only connected to one, so maybe she’s using a different one) and we’re not on any other social media. We could message again, but she may have blocked us, and she clearly doesn’t want to hear from us. She could still be on this site. Who knows, she might even read this. We’d like to hear from her again, if only to know that she’s okay. But we doubt we ever will.

Ghosting in the real world is a horrible thing to do to someone, especially if you have invested your energies and friendship in the person, and opened your life to them.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Over the years I've been on fab it happened many times. But it was them who suggested the meet, not me. Lot of people say some enjoy the chase but never intend to meet. Who knows why they do it. I always meet when I arrange it. And in case I change my mind I always let them know in advance.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

Never had this yet but we dod tend to cut to the chase quite quickly so we would not have a load of time invested in them if thy did just fall off the planet 1 day

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ighwayman04 OP   Man
over a year ago

Rhyl or warrington

Not all at. She arranged to meet then just ghosted me the day before .

It’s rude that in any form of meeting up.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ellytransvTV/TS
over a year ago

Wirral


"Sounds like you want people forced to play with you because you swapped numbers to me."

Some people are always so negative, did you actually read the op post? ... He chatted, swapped numbers, swapped pics and arranged a meet and was then ghosted. Nothing forceful about that.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Anyone else have a problem (m or f) with this lately? It seems to be happening more and more.

Was chatting to someone for a couple of weeks, swapped numbers and traded pics etc. Arranged to meet last Sunday and on the Saturday morning I found I was blocked on everything with zero explanation. Just find it a bit odd/rude and wasting my precious time .

I think it’s about time something is brought in to highlight this. Basically the opposite to veris but in a negative way to avoid it happening.

Comments please

"

You say it seems to be happening more and more so how many times has it happened to you?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sounds like you want people forced to play with you because you swapped numbers to me.

Some people are always so negative, did you actually read the op post? ... He chatted, swapped numbers, swapped pics and arranged a meet and was then ghosted. Nothing forceful about that."

And you both think this is a new phenomena on FS?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ighwayman04 OP   Man
over a year ago

Rhyl or warrington


"Anyone else have a problem (m or f) with this lately? It seems to be happening more and more.

Was chatting to someone for a couple of weeks, swapped numbers and traded pics etc. Arranged to meet last Sunday and on the Saturday morning I found I was blocked on everything with zero explanation. Just find it a bit odd/rude and wasting my precious time .

I think it’s about time something is brought in to highlight this. Basically the opposite to veris but in a negative way to avoid it happening.

Comments please

You say it seems to be happening more and more so how many times has it happened to you? "

Twice now. But speaking to other girl friends off here it’s happened to them as well.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had it off a dating site. Chatted to her a while and arranged to meet up. Had a great day together. Chatted afterwards over a long period, saying we would have to meet up again soon (distance and the hours of her work made that and chatting hard so we tended to message and leave recorded voice messages). She had a change in her work and encouraged me to call then never picked up or replied to my messages or voice emails. Saw she had read the messages bug nothing else happened. Her profile then disappeared. She may have decided it wasn't right, or met someone else but it would have been courteous to have said something.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve just had it happen to me a fortnight ago, after seeing him for two years.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *arkndirtyMan
over a year ago

sale

Think it is easier said then done but I always think someone acting like a knob is doing you a favour. It is a lot more damaging when someone is apparently decent and then when you are more attached, more connected they then show their true colours.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *urvelover39Man
over a year ago

Somewhere


"I’ve just had it happen to me a fortnight ago, after seeing him for two years. "

Must be mad! or leading a double life.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Not all at. She arranged to meet then just ghosted me the day before .

It’s rude that in any form of meeting up. "

It's not ghosting though, it's just bad manners for whatever reason

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’ve just had it happen to me a fortnight ago, after seeing him for two years. "

That sounds terrible!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We’ve had this recently. Last September we met a lady on here. Clicked straight away, so quickly that we never even connected on the site as friends or verified each other.

This lady transcended a Fab connection and became a real friend to us for almost a year. She became a part of our real world lives and a genuine, close friend with a little extra intimacy.

After about 9 months we began to notice that the pleasantries and intimacies that had quickly defined our friendship for so many months began to change. We were worried about her, but she maintained that nothing was wrong, until the coldness she was imposing became unavoidable.

Since then we have been ghosted. The last communication we had was when we invited her to meet for a coffee. She succinctly declined the invite and then didn’t respond to any further messages. We sent an email, which has been ignored. After almost a year of very close friendship, this abrupt dismissal has been confusing and hurtful. We still don’t really understand why.

The experience has made us feel foolish and cheap, like for the best part of a year she simply used us until she got bored or found someone better. She clearly has her reasons, but she never respected us enough to be honest about them.

Right now we don’t know if she’s moved house, if she’s alive or dead. She hasn’t posted anything to Instagram (she has two accounts but we were only connected to one, so maybe she’s using a different one) and we’re not on any other social media. We could message again, but she may have blocked us, and she clearly doesn’t want to hear from us. She could still be on this site. Who knows, she might even read this. We’d like to hear from her again, if only to know that she’s okay. But we doubt we ever will.

Ghosting in the real world is a horrible thing to do to someone, especially if you have invested your energies and friendship in the person, and opened your life to them. "

Truly heartbreaking the not knowing!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *irkydirkyMan
over a year ago

kells

People change their minds, it’s no big deal..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago

Dudley

I wouldn't call it ghosting, that's more if someone you're in a relationship with suddenly stops speaking to you and avoids any contact. This is just someone who was either not who they claimed to be or just a fantasist, maybe they just changed their mind. It's crap but it's happened to me too, just move on.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’ve just had it happen to me a fortnight ago, after seeing him for two years.

That sounds terrible! "

It is because I don’t know if anything’s happened to him or he’s just thought I don’t want to do this anymore. But I keep an eye out on here so if I see him at least I know he’s ok.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ilsaGeorgeCouple
over a year ago

kent


"We’ve had this recently. Last September we met a lady on here. Clicked straight away, so quickly that we never even connected on the site as friends or verified each other.

This lady transcended a Fab connection and became a real friend to us for almost a year. She became a part of our real world lives and a genuine, close friend with a little extra intimacy.

After about 9 months we began to notice that the pleasantries and intimacies that had quickly defined our friendship for so many months began to change. We were worried about her, but she maintained that nothing was wrong, until the coldness she was imposing became unavoidable.

Since then we have been ghosted. The last communication we had was when we invited her to meet for a coffee. She succinctly declined the invite and then didn’t respond to any further messages. We sent an email, which has been ignored. After almost a year of very close friendship, this abrupt dismissal has been confusing and hurtful. We still don’t really understand why.

The experience has made us feel foolish and cheap, like for the best part of a year she simply used us until she got bored or found someone better. She clearly has her reasons, but she never respected us enough to be honest about them.

Right now we don’t know if she’s moved house, if she’s alive or dead. She hasn’t posted anything to Instagram (she has two accounts but we were only connected to one, so maybe she’s using a different one) and we’re not on any other social media. We could message again, but she may have blocked us, and she clearly doesn’t want to hear from us. She could still be on this site. Who knows, she might even read this. We’d like to hear from her again, if only to know that she’s okay. But we doubt we ever will.

Ghosting in the real world is a horrible thing to do to someone, especially if you have invested your energies and friendship in the person, and opened your life to them.

Truly heartbreaking the not knowing! "

To lose a valued friend without understanding why is really hard.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

[Removed by poster at 13/10/19 19:12:14]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Yep, happened to me as well OP. Seems to be happening quite a lot on here to people. I can only assume that it's done by people who like the thrill of the chase, those searching for wank fodder or fantasists.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inful xWoman
over a year ago

In a sleepy little village

Ghosting is the cowards way out. It's a shitty thing to do to someone no matter what the situation. Grow a pair, have some manners and tell the person you no longer want to chat/meet

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 13/10/19 19:16:02]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"People change their minds, it’s no big deal.. "

Lucky you that you can just brush it off..for some of us that's just not so easy...it's an incredibly rude and cowardly way to behave. If you've changed your mind have the decency to say so!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ghosting is the cowards way out. It's a shitty thing to do to someone no matter what the situation. Grow a pair, have some manners and tell the person you no longer want to chat/meet "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 13/10/19 19:18:03]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *elshsunsWoman
over a year ago

Flintshire


"I’ve just had it happen to me a fortnight ago, after seeing him for two years. "

That’s awful hope you ok xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’ve just had it happen to me a fortnight ago, after seeing him for two years.

That sounds terrible!

It is because I don’t know if anything’s happened to him or he’s just thought I don’t want to do this anymore. But I keep an eye out on here so if I see him at least I know he’s ok. "

That must be dreadful. Obviously you want to know he is ok but at the same time if that is the case then why suddenly go quiet. Fingers crossed you get some resolution from this x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Anyone else have a problem (m or f) with this lately? It seems to be happening more and more.

Was chatting to someone for a couple of weeks, swapped numbers and traded pics etc. Arranged to meet last Sunday and on the Saturday morning I found I was blocked on everything with zero explanation. Just find it a bit odd/rude and wasting my precious time .

I think it’s about time something is brought in to highlight this. Basically the opposite to veris but in a negative way to avoid it happening.

Comments please

"

Had you actually spoke to her or just messages ? She might be a he otherwise.

Even though its horrible theres nothing Fab can do as people might simply make false allegations about others.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 13/10/19 19:28:27]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’ve just had it happen to me a fortnight ago, after seeing him for two years.

That sounds terrible!

It is because I don’t know if anything’s happened to him or he’s just thought I don’t want to do this anymore. But I keep an eye out on here so if I see him at least I know he’s ok. "

Haooened to me two weeks ago with a woman on here I had known her for two years too. . She deleted her profile on here a few days before. It's the fact you've lost a really good friend that hurts.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’ve just had it happen to me a fortnight ago, after seeing him for two years.

That sounds terrible!

It is because I don’t know if anything’s happened to him or he’s just thought I don’t want to do this anymore. But I keep an eye out on here so if I see him at least I know he’s ok.

That must be dreadful. Obviously you want to know he is ok but at the same time if that is the case then why suddenly go quiet. Fingers crossed you get some resolution from this x"

I was thinking the same. Mind blowing that after two years there’s no goodbye - everyone needs closure hope you get some answers. I assume the profile from here has disappeared.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’ve just had it happen to me a fortnight ago, after seeing him for two years.

That sounds terrible!

It is because I don’t know if anything’s happened to him or he’s just thought I don’t want to do this anymore. But I keep an eye out on here so if I see him at least I know he’s ok.

That must be dreadful. Obviously you want to know he is ok but at the same time if that is the case then why suddenly go quiet. Fingers crossed you get some resolution from this x

I was thinking the same. Mind blowing that after two years there’s no goodbye - everyone needs closure hope you get some answers. I assume the profile from here has disappeared. "

He deleted his profile a while ago like I did myself, I’m just assuming that he’ll come back on here. But it’s just one of those ones that I can’t do anything about it, other than get on with my own life and even though I’m hurting hope he’s ok.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Happened to me with someone I met a couple of times. Said he wanted a regular thing and I thought we were getting on great. I don't understand why people aren't just honest if they're no longer interested. It is really annoying....and rude!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m going to sound a lot older than I am (!) but the decline in respect and manners in general is really, really sad.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ighwayman04 OP   Man
over a year ago

Rhyl or warrington


"Anyone else have a problem (m or f) with this lately? It seems to be happening more and more.

Was chatting to someone for a couple of weeks, swapped numbers and traded pics etc. Arranged to meet last Sunday and on the Saturday morning I found I was blocked on everything with zero explanation. Just find it a bit odd/rude and wasting my precious time .

I think it’s about time something is brought in to highlight this. Basically the opposite to veris but in a negative way to avoid it happening.

Comments please

Had you actually spoke to her or just messages ? She might be a he otherwise.

Even though its horrible theres nothing Fab can do as people might simply make false allegations about others."

Only on what’s app but she sent pics of her just before she was going out on more than one occasion. Plus she had several verifications.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *969BewitchedWoman
over a year ago

Nottingham

Happens all the time. I am actually more surprised these days if someone actually turns up!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As long as they don't crumb you

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just move on with your day but I am fairly cynical with this kinda thing so everyone reacts differently

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *etite HandfulWoman
over a year ago

Chester

It happens its better a straight cut off than to waste more of each others time.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes twice in the last couple of months

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes several times, they do the talk but not the walk unfortunately. I find it bad manners and they hit the recycle bin. I’ve got ruthless now with the block button after so many stand ups.

Shame really as it spoils the fun of fab

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top