FabSwingers.com forum: Speed of the delete

By *ovkid66 OP Man
over a year ago

Warwick

I only message single ladies and couples with whom I match. Recently I have found my messages which are always polite and respectful are being deleted almost as they arrive. I dont get shirty or mad and say anything as it's not my way but it is beginning to get a bit disconcerting.

Any couples or single ladies want to comment on their experiences.

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By *ittleMissCaliWoman
over a year ago

trouble most likely, or creating it :)

If i get a message where its clear my profile hasn't been read or they dont match what im looking for then I will delete or just not reply.

I Treat it like junk mail through my letterbox

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By *oubledongWoman
over a year ago

Headington, Oxford

For the same reason you chuck junk mail in the recycling without opening it. You have determined you are not interested just from the first impression.

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By *roticGoddessXXWoman
over a year ago

Richmond

I generally only delete immediately if the heading is rude or obviously not what I'm looking for.

I know some just bulk delete most messages when the quantity is overwhelming.

Profile pictures are also important to me. If a face pic, a smile is essential.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If i get a message where its clear my profile hasn't been read or they dont match what im looking for then I will delete or just not reply.

I Treat it like junk mail through my letterbox"

To be fair, deleting is a more readily understood reply than reading and ignoring. Leaves you in no doubt, which I very much prefer.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I only message single ladies and couples with whom I match. Recently I have found my messages which are always polite and respectful are being deleted almost as they arrive. I dont get shirty or mad and say anything as it's not my way but it is beginning to get a bit disconcerting.

Any couples or single ladies want to comment on their experiences. "

That is (fab) for you.

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By *eliciousladyWoman
over a year ago

Sometimes U.K

Fabs..it’s a fickle place that’s impossible for man or woman to fully understand.

No point in trying to second guess why, best just to move on.

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

Treat it as a reply, which is not interested. I can imagine how difficult it is for the single guys on here, but that's the site for you.

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By *amRod64Man
over a year ago

Gravesend

it happens, would not worry too much, you need to be able to move on......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You can ALWAYS tell when someone has not read your profile so I delete immediately! That's about 99 percent of messages I receive daily.

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By *oldyoudown41Man
over a year ago

caledonian

Any couples or single ladies want to comment on their experiences. "

It’s not personal, I get it all the time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Any couples or single ladies want to comment on their experiences. "

Well fella if they delete they aint interested simple as that. I get told all the time by women they know better than to say no thanks because its a green like to pester with the but why not message. Just take a delete for what it is a not interested right now if they haven't blocked you and leave it a while before saying hello again.

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

It's easier than having to deal with the follow up messages of "Why not" "let me change your mind" etc etc....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We had-

Him-Do you meet men?

Us- no

Him- what about black men?

Us- no we don’t.

Him- racist c*nts.

That’s why men get blocked.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I used to reply to every message I got, and soon realised that I just don't have the time to read and reply to them all...especially on my single profile. As others have said, some messages are obviously junk mail (people who haven't read our/my profile and have put little or no effort into their message and are often quite rude!), they get deleted as soon as I notice them, in the hope I can keep up with the decent messages. I'll always reply to people who've made an effort, even if it's to say a polite no thank you.

If this website was only frequented by people who were genuinely looking to meet like minded people, it would be a much happier place to be, but sadly that's not the case. In the years we've been here, it's got progressively harder to find genuine people, and the quantity of messages from people who are only after some manner of online titillation has risen dramatically.

As frustrating as it must be for you, and as despondent as you must feel, it's worth being tenacious because when you meet the right kind of people, it's a lot of fun!

Good luck in your search, hang in there and try not to take any sort of rejection personally.

V x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was blocked a minute after messaging a lady despite matching everything on her profile. Is this a record??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don’t think a block is a bad thing. It just means she doesn’t think you are compatible and it’s saves wasting time messaging in the future.

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"I was blocked a minute after messaging a lady despite matching everything on her profile. Is this a record??"

If someone doesn't fancy you, they don't fancy you.

Thems the breaks.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"I was blocked a minute after messaging a lady despite matching everything on her profile. Is this a record??"

No. I've done it faster.

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By *evaquitCouple
over a year ago

Catthorpe

We know our demographic and it's mainly a straight delete as we don't recieve many messages from those we're looking for.

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By *alking HeadMan
over a year ago

Bolton

"Don’t think a block is a bad thing. It just means she doesn’t think you are compatible and it’s saves wasting time messaging in the future. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was blocked a minute after messaging a lady despite matching everything on her profile. Is this a record??"
Now this bugs me, I get it a lot. "I match all your requirements, therefore we must meet".

You may match everything, apart from mutual physical attraction. Which for me would still be a no thanks and a swift delete and block.

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By *eah BabyCouple
over a year ago

Cheshire, Windermere ,Cumbria

We got a message from a couple tonight who wanted to meet Saturday at their hotel, we asked if they wanted to swap fac pics to see on attraction before we agreed to anything, they read our message and then blocked us, they have veris so not a fake profile so dont worry the site is full of weird and wonderful people just move on, just glad we didn’t send ours lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was blocked a minute after messaging a lady despite matching everything on her profile. Is this a record?? Now this bugs me, I get it a lot. "I match all your requirements, therefore we must meet".

You may match everything, apart from mutual physical attraction. Which for me would still be a no thanks and a swift delete and block."

I’m not a we must immediately meet kind of person. I like to chat and get to know someone, then maybe a social meet first. I may be a lot of things but I never rush

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

You may match everything, apart from mutual physical attraction. Which for me would still be a no thanks and a swift delete and block."

Or, I'm of the belief we match. So few who think they do, do.

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By *uliette500Woman
over a year ago

Hull

If I get a message from a guy and it is obvious he hasn't read my profile he is gone without a doubt.

I don't reply if I am not interested after reading message and checking his profile as it leads to either a determination from him to change my mind or on some occasions a stack of abuse for turning him down.

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By *AYENCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

If there's no attachment it gets instantly deleted - unread.

If they trick me with their cock pic attached they get blocked

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By *eviationMan
over a year ago

Brynamman

I prefer to get a "not for me"

And if your lucky enough to get so many you couldn't possibly read or reply to everyone pop your filters on for a while until you can,Its just being polite and a nice thing to do.

If a dick head then persists BLOCK

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a strange place, I've had a couple fab some pictures today! & then they blocked me!

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By *ovkid66 OP Man
over a year ago

Warwick

Thanks V, and i know it can be a lot of fun when it goes right. Just getting it to go right. I read every profile, from top to bottom, check out the veris if you can, tailor every message to the profile I have just read, always unless stated believe I'm talking to the male of a couple. If I get a no thank you, if I reply at all it's with a no worries, enjoy. Its respect and politeness from me all the way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was blocked a minute after messaging a lady despite matching everything on her profile. Is this a record??"

i get this all the time ..hey ive match everything on your profile we make a perfect match ...me ..but i dont fancy you ?? so how are we the perfect match ???

its ok matching everything on profile but none of thats no good if the attraction is not there ?

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By *ovkid66 OP Man
over a year ago

Warwick

You may match everything, apart from mutual physical attraction. Which for me would still be a no thanks and a swift delete and block."

I'm happy to be deleted and blocked, and I understand about attraction. I also know my pics arent the best. But just a no, not attracted or not for me/us before the block would be a polite thing to do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 03/09/19 20:36:14]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 03/09/19 20:36:10]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

no answer is no thanks

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By *ovkid66 OP Man
over a year ago

Warwick

You may match everything, apart from mutual physical attraction. Which for me would still be a no thanks and a swift delete and block.

I’m not a we must immediately meet kind of person. I like to chat and get to know someone, then maybe a social meet first. I may be a lot of things but I never rush"

I'm the same as I think a social is a good thing. It gives everyone the chance to assess each other, looks personality and the x factor which you can never judge from a picture or profile.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Any couples or single ladies want to comment on their experiences. "

To be totally honest if you are not interested in someone its the best option. It saves getting pestered if its gone from their sent box when they look and you dont get the why not questions.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You may match everything, apart from mutual physical attraction. Which for me would still be a no thanks and a swift delete and block.

I’m not a we must immediately meet kind of person. I like to chat and get to know someone, then maybe a social meet first. I may be a lot of things but I never rush

I'm the same as I think a social is a good thing. It gives everyone the chance to assess each other, looks personality and the x factor which you can never judge from a picture or profile."

Yes you can, I can easily judge if I'm going to fancy someone from a photo.

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