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has sharing your wife/gf made you closer as a couple?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

No, you need to be emotionally close to do it successfully

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No,but it gives me a rest

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"No, you need to be emotionally close to do it successfully

"

in what way do you mean

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By *aughtyDuo159Couple
over a year ago

Pontefract

No made us closer but has made it easier to express are selfs

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Nah ..she fucked off to Australia

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"No, you need to be emotionally close to do it successfully

in what way do you mean"

You need to be able to talk, discuss doubts and fears and feel that your relationship is rock solid

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Nah ..she fucked off to Australia "

do you think that she was used to general sex within the relationship, then got the taste for sex with new/different men and then wanted to have that else where?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope.

If we weren’t as close as we possibly can be, we wouldn’t be swinging.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Nope.

If we weren’t as close as we possibly can be, we wouldn’t be swinging. "

of course, but don't you think many strong long term couples loose affection towards each other after many years (for example 10-15yrs) sex becomes very standard with contains the same routines, gets bit boring (not in a rude way just isn't a change or any excitement anymore)

and then you start swinging and having new things to try, new scene with men or women joining in, surely that makes you sexually closer back to how it used to be?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Nope.

If we weren’t as close as we possibly can be, we wouldn’t be swinging.

of course, but don't you think many strong long term couples loose affection towards each other after many years (for example 10-15yrs) sex becomes very standard with contains the same routines, gets bit boring (not in a rude way just isn't a change or any excitement anymore)

and then you start swinging and having new things to try, new scene with men or women joining in, surely that makes you sexually closer back to how it used to be?"

I wouldn’t know.

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By *andb69Couple
over a year ago

leeds

Definitely not

As some have already said, if we weren't as close, secure and trusting as it is possible to be we wouldn't be swinging anyway.

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By *r and Mrs B xxCouple
over a year ago

Chippenham


"Nope.

If we weren’t as close as we possibly can be, we wouldn’t be swinging.

of course, but don't you think many strong long term couples loose affection towards each other after many years (for example 10-15yrs) sex becomes very standard with contains the same routines, gets bit boring (not in a rude way just isn't a change or any excitement anymore)

and then you start swinging and having new things to try, new scene with men or women joining in, surely that makes you sexually closer back to how it used to be?"

Definitely agree with this. We have been together for nearly 40 years and our sex life had definitely gone stale. Swinging has added the spark back to our sex life, and we are loving having our naughty secret. Just wish we had started when we were younger.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Nope.

If we weren’t as close as we possibly can be, we wouldn’t be swinging.

of course, but don't you think many strong long term couples loose affection towards each other after many years (for example 10-15yrs) sex becomes very standard with contains the same routines, gets bit boring (not in a rude way just isn't a change or any excitement anymore)

and then you start swinging and having new things to try, new scene with men or women joining in, surely that makes you sexually closer back to how it used to be?"

Oh you meant sexually closer. I do think there's an element of sharing something unique that comes with looking at each other as you fuck someone else. It doesn't make swingers sex lives better necessarily

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By *ikeandmollyCouple
over a year ago

swindon

We started swinging 9 months ago as I (Molly) wanted to find out if I was really bi and yes I’m we were having lots of fun so we stayed swinging we have been together 22 years and the only thing that I could say has changed is now we eye up women together when out and about We have always been close wouldn’t of married someone I was not close to. He’s my best friend as he should be.

Molly

XX

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you need to share your other half to get closer, then humbly, we’d suggest swinging is the wrong way to do it. It’s all arse about face. You need to be honest, secure and close before you go down this route. Mentally stable helps too..

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By *uriousTwosomeCouple
over a year ago

Manchester

Yes. You do need to be close initially, but when you are open enough to be able to say “I wanna fuck him/her” any legacy worries about past relationships cheating disappear

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wouldn’t say it makes us closer but the after sex is amazing.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Wouldn’t say it makes us closer but the after sex is amazing."

i bet its the best sex ever lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Indeed. We both came much closer ever than before .

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By *lixir of lifeMan
over a year ago

knob Creek

Am I the only one who thinks swinging doesn’t have to involve sex ?

Some couples like the clubs, like dressing in sexy underwear to make the females feel sexy and the male feel proud ..

This lifestyle isn’t necessarily about sharing ..

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By *lixir of lifeMan
over a year ago

knob Creek

And what about wives sharing the guys ?

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By *lanemikeMan
over a year ago

Bolton

Would love to have a wife/partner/FWB to share....!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good sharing ppl everyone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have had very limited play despite dipping our toes in for the last 4 years or so. We already had a great sex life and a good relationship of 30 years but this has definitely added a spark that we didn’t know was missing until we tried, it’s our secret thing for us and we are enjoying the thrill, even if its just putting pics on here for others to see.

Mrs L

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By *reedy_for_funCouple
over a year ago

My House


"Am I the only one who thinks swinging doesn’t have to involve sex ?

Some couples like the clubs, like dressing in sexy underwear to make the females feel sexy and the male feel proud ..

This lifestyle isn’t necessarily about sharing .."

Then you need to look up the definition of swinging

That's not too say what you started isn't right for the people who approach this 'lifestyle' with that in mind but swinging is all about having sex outside a normal couples relationship. The difference between swinging and cheating is that you do it with the full consent of your partner.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"?"
yes she left 3 years ago we get on fine now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, as it’s already been pointed out. If your relationship isn’t already pretty much spot on this isn’t the thing for you.

Swinging is a compliment to our sex life. It is not our sex life whatsoever.

Though the reclaim sex is the best sex I’ve ever had!!!

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By *lixir of lifeMan
over a year ago

knob Creek


"Am I the only one who thinks swinging doesn’t have to involve sex ?

Some couples like the clubs, like dressing in sexy underwear to make the females feel sexy and the male feel proud ..

This lifestyle isn’t necessarily about sharing ..

Then you need to look up the definition of swinging

That's not too say what you started isn't right for the people who approach this 'lifestyle' with that in mind but swinging is all about having sex outside a normal couples relationship. The difference between swinging and cheating is that you do it with the full consent of your partner."

I disagree.. swinging is anything you want it to be .. between two loving people.. some like to cam or go to clubs to socialise..

It’s however people want to interpret it ..

There’s no rules on what people do x

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester


"Am I the only one who thinks swinging doesn’t have to involve sex ?

Some couples like the clubs, like dressing in sexy underwear to make the females feel sexy and the male feel proud ..

This lifestyle isn’t necessarily about sharing .."

I would suggest you probably are the only one, but I’ve no doubt there will be the usual ones who will say it’s what you want it to be.

I would liken your example as akin to someone who reads a book about fishing, joins a forum to contribute as an expert, and goes to the lake or river to offer advice and help despite having never held a rod in his hand.

There’s nothing wrong with that per se, but to call himself a fisherman is wrong, just as a couple who have never engaged in any sexual activity with anyone other than each other can hardly be called swingers.

If they just like others to watch them they are exhibitionists, if they just like to watch others they are voyeurs, if they don’t have sex but like to show off how they look in clubs they are posers.

As I say, I’m not judging anyone here, but none of this is swinging.

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend


"Nah ..she fucked off to Australia

do you think that she was used to general sex within the relationship, then got the taste for sex with new/different men and then wanted to have that else where?"
she is coming back soon

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By *arnsleycpl4uCouple
over a year ago

Barnsley

You are with someone you love if you have that bond it just erotic to share does it matter ( you and your partner are you both still share the same bed do holidays pay bills work bring children up what wrong with you when you both want a bit more excitement and enjoy other men / women/ cpls x

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By *eakcoupleCouple
over a year ago

peak district

In some ways, yes. We were in love anyway and decided to swing as we both need sexual variety, and it has worked well for us. Instead of hidden affairs, thing are out in the open and we can enjoy sex with someone else in front of the other without jealousy, suspicion etc.

Whenever we've had the need to include friends or find new people in clubs, we've just said "let's do it!" without embarrassment. We both enjoy the sight of the other one fucking someone else, and particularly when I see R with another man or woman - or more than one - and she starts cumming it makes me feel very close to her, I know I'm lucky that I'm the man doing this to her most often. Hard to explain unless you've had similar thoughts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We’ve hardly played at all with others in the 4 years we have been going to clubs and enjoying the exhibitionist side, so maybe we aren’t swingers but we have had a. bloody good time and had some fantastic sex with each other from the thrills of being naughty in public

Mr L

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Swinging with my wife made are sex more intense eventually she fell in love with some one and we couldn't get over that so she married him in the end so theres dangers

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38


"Nope.

If we weren’t as close as we possibly can be, we wouldn’t be swinging.

of course, but don't you think many strong long term couples loose affection towards each other after many years (for example 10-15yrs) sex becomes very standard with contains the same routines, gets bit boring (not in a rude way just isn't a change or any excitement anymore)

and then you start swinging and having new things to try, new scene with men or women joining in, surely that makes you sexually closer back to how it used to be?

Definitely agree with this. We have been together for nearly 40 years and our sex life had definitely gone stale. Swinging has added the spark back to our sex life, and we are loving having our naughty secret. Just wish we had started when we were younger."

Wow 40 years..that's impressive

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can’t find the poem I’m thinking of but the gist was

If you love someone set them free, if they come back then you have true love.

If they don’t you were never really meant to be.

So we are together and get a thrill from the prospect of Mrs playing with others.

I don’t feel threatened because it’s all in the open and I’m a very pragmatic person, if it’s meant to be then we will deal with it.

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