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Double standards of fab

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

So. The last 4 men I've met have thrown out the fab double standard. Fuckable not dateable.

I'm single so use fab to scratch an itch. But I'm looking for a regular partner. However, when I've met men doing the same. Here and on other dating sites it would seem because I'm doing this I'm not dateable.

This has thrown me a little bit.

Of course when I hear such dross I realise said person isn't worthy of my time. But having met some ladies off fab also in my situation, they've encountered the same double standard.

I don't really have a question as such. I just needed to get this outta my head

To think we've evolved.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yup same

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How is it a double standard?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How is it a double standard?

"

I guess because they’ll fuck you,but wouldn’t dream of dating you...selfish!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Snap.

Men seem to want a women who willing to play. But minute they find one. Oh u can't play with others.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is a double standard, but double standards abound on Fab, very often in favour of women.

The usual reply is that people are here for themselves and don’t owe anyone else anything.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How is it a double standard?

I guess because they’ll fuck you,but wouldn’t dream of dating you...selfish!"

Tbf, they don't sound like the kinda guy that's worth dating

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fuckable not dateable is understandable if there's a physical attraction but you don't click... however, saying someone is undateable because you're on here is just silly, particularly as they are here too!!

I'd argue it could be a more exciting relationship as a result of being on here!

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

I think it's a bit like star trek.. if you feel you can lower your shields with someone then you can move towards a more date me relationship

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!.

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By *xyzptlk088Man
over a year ago

Galway

"I'm single so use fab to scratch an itch."

quote from OP yet the OP seems to be complaining when a guy does the self same thing,I am on here to find some like minded people who want some fun with no strings therefore to fuck not to date. There are plenty of dating sites online if that's what you're looking for.

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By *orbidden eastMan
over a year ago

london dodging electric scooters


"But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!."

What he said

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!."

Agree but I met someone out of fab. Then we talked about sexual preferences and it came up we were both on.

I didn't explain that at the beginning because that isn't the point.

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By *rated-BaconMan
over a year ago

medway

My god. I dream of finding a fab woman who will enjoy everyone.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Fuckable not dateable is understandable if there's a physical attraction but you don't click... however, saying someone is undateable because you're on here is just silly, particularly as they are here too!!

I'd argue it could be a more exciting relationship as a result of being on here!"
.

That's what I would think. If you meet someone who's far from vanilla it's great. It's a good step to climb from

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!."

The site brings different things for different people.

To presume everyone gets the same is a little small minded. I saw someone for five months off here.

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By *st 1972Man
over a year ago

Kingswinford


"So. The last 4 men I've met have thrown out the fab double standard. Fuckable not dateable.

I'm single so use fab to scratch an itch. But I'm looking for a regular partner. However, when I've met men doing the same. Here and on other dating sites it would seem because I'm doing this I'm not dateable.

As someone who is single it's inevitable that that you will think a step further if there's a connection even if meet on here looking for no strings, I've been there myself nothing wrong with that

This has thrown me a little bit.

Of course when I hear such dross I realise said person isn't worthy of my time. But having met some ladies off fab also in my situation, they've encountered the same double standard.

I don't really have a question as such. I just needed to get this outta my head

To think we've evolved. "

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

The difference between here and elsewhere is that people will - no guarantees as we know about lies - be open to non-monogamous relationships and be upfront about only seeking sex, compared to the more general world.

All genders can be totally fixed on a closed relationship, though men often get tagged as the obsessive and controlling ones.

But it ultimately depends on each of us, how we've perceived how we 'should' behave as well as those of the genders we would date. Those perceived pressures are real and very strong - even if we can ultimately disregard them and make our own life and standards. We can make our standards as clear and simple, such that they work for us. The dissonance we may feel at any point can be a reminder to just do what is right for us and recognition that finding our way and understanding others, who will typically be different, is tough.

Fairytale prince and princesses finding love are just one part of the cultural influences that guide us.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


""I'm single so use fab to scratch an itch."

quote from OP yet the OP seems to be complaining when a guy does the self same thing,I am on here to find some like minded people who want some fun with no strings therefore to fuck not to date. There are plenty of dating sites online if that's what you're looking for."

Oh dear. I wasn't complaining. I said there's not really a question it needed to leave my head

But again. The site brings different things to different people. If that's what you seek fantastic. I avoid nsa/ quick fuck messages cause I'm not seeking it. And when I do I trot along to a club. It is all left at the club. But thanks for judging me on that. Appreciated.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The difference between here and elsewhere is that people will - no guarantees as we know about lies - be open to non-monogamous relationships and be upfront about only seeking sex, compared to the more general world.

All genders can be totally fixed on a closed relationship, though men often get tagged as the obsessive and controlling ones.

But it ultimately depends on each of us, how we've perceived how we 'should' behave as well as those of the genders we would date. Those perceived pressures are real and very strong - even if we can ultimately disregard them and make our own life and standards. We can make our standards as clear and simple, such that they work for us. The dissonance we may feel at any point can be a reminder to just do what is right for us and recognition that finding our way and understanding others, who will typically be different, is tough.

Fairytale prince and princesses finding love are just one part of the cultural influences that guide us."

Thanks for a reasonable considered reply. It's nice to read.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Did they say you being here made you undateable. Or is that an assumption? I couldn't quite ote tell from the post.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What is your definition of relationship? Open relationship, monogamous relationship, swinging relationship, fwb?

I reckon that most men want a naive quite girl that has no regards for sex, unless it’s with himself. This is why a lot won’t date someone that actually matches them in the bedroom. I guess they perceive that “type” to be more likely to wander, in a monogamous relationship at least.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are some men who frequent sites like these happy to meet up & have sex with hundreds of women, but could never date them.

They don’t ever think about the fact that they are the male equivalent of these women on sites like this.

Sexually liberated, confident women scare & intimidate insecure men.

Don’t waste any of your precious time with them. Plenty of men who are secure enough within themselves to not have an issue with a woman’s sexual past/present.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!."

It can be both for many people. There’s nothing in the rules to say that this site cannot be used by people for dating, infact many use it successfully.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's not just something that occurs here.

I've met men who haven't even known about fab but yet I've still fallen into that category

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By *uckslut and MCouple
over a year ago

Poole


"But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!.

What he said "

I said this last week on another thread, and got witch hunted. Sex site not dating!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!.

It can be both for many people. There’s nothing in the rules to say that this site cannot be used by people for dating, infact many use it successfully. "

If I ever found someone I clicked with on here and we had stuff in common, I'd definitely date them. Whether or not I'd want an open relationship with someone is another matter entirely because I truly don't know.

I don't understand the mentality that because it's a swinging site, it's purely about sex. Like you say it can be about both.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!.

What he said

I said this last week on another thread, and got witch hunted. Sex site not dating! "

It’s actually a swingers site, however that doesn’t mean everyone uses it as such.

And as I said before, there is nothing in the rules to say people cannot use this site for dating.

If people who choose to use this site differently to you, bother you, block them.

Everyone is entitled to use Fab as they see fit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally I don't see why you wouldn't be datable. All the curves in all the right places. Tick my boxes for sure

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By *ojos party boyMan
over a year ago

Merseyside


"But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!.

What he said

I said this last week on another thread, and got witch hunted. Sex site not dating! "

It really depends what little clique of forumites seem to be online, Once one posts a disparaging reply the rest follow suit and start the witchhunt

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By *inkywife1981Couple
over a year ago

A town near you

I would think any guy looking for a partner would love to find an open minded sexually liberated woman such as those who have posted here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!.

It can be both for many people. There’s nothing in the rules to say that this site cannot be used by people for dating, infact many use it successfully. "

You may use it for whatever you desire, it’s just unlikely to give you the desired results. I agree that a relationship can easily blossom, though this is not the place to be actively seeking it. If one does blossom, then surely it had originally stemmed from fb fwbswinging relationship romantic relationship.

You’re going to have a whole lot of sweet nothings whispered in your ear. When a man wants something, there’s no other way to get it, but to appease to your desires(for that moment).

I wish you luck.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!."

We tend to see it as such too. I think that problems occur because either people don't communicate clearly how they see or use fab and assume that everyone feels as they do or opportunists will claim to feel the same way to improve their chances.

Many of the single guys we meet are at pains to point out that they would never swing when in a relationship which to me says it all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would love to find a partner and only looking on here as I what someone in to this life stail not had any luck sadly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!.

It can be both for many people. There’s nothing in the rules to say that this site cannot be used by people for dating, infact many use it successfully.

You may use it for whatever you desire, it’s just unlikely to give you the desired results. I agree that a relationship can easily blossom, though this is not the place to be actively seeking it. If one does blossom, then surely it had originally stemmed from fb fwbswinging relationship romantic relationship.

You’re going to have a whole lot of sweet nothings whispered in your ear. When a man wants something, there’s no other way to get it, but to appease to your desires(for that moment).

I wish you luck.

"

I’m not sure what part of my post gave you the impression I’m using this site for dating, I can assure you I’m not, so your post towards me isn’t useful lol.

Plenty people are though, and there’s enough success stories within the forum to reassure anyone who does use this site for more than sex.

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By *azler17Man
over a year ago

Castleford

My last girlfriend was off fab, so there is dateable is out there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!.

It can be both for many people. There’s nothing in the rules to say that this site cannot be used by people for dating, infact many use it successfully.

You may use it for whatever you desire, it’s just unlikely to give you the desired results. I agree that a relationship can easily blossom, though this is not the place to be actively seeking it. If one does blossom, then surely it had originally stemmed from fb fwbswinging relationship romantic relationship.

You’re going to have a whole lot of sweet nothings whispered in your ear. When a man wants something, there’s no other way to get it, but to appease to your desires(for that moment).

I wish you luck.

I’m not sure what part of my post gave you the impression I’m using this site for dating, I can assure you I’m not, so your post towards me isn’t useful lol.

Plenty people are though, and there’s enough success stories within the forum to reassure anyone who does use this site for more than sex. "

The majority of it was aimed at the op’s comment. Though it also relates to what you had mentioned also. I think I had intended to reply more to the op, though done so to you by mistake.

My post never denied that relationships can form.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Did they say you being here made you undateable. Or is that an assumption? I couldn't quite ote tell from the post. "

Wondering the same.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I ended up in a 3 year relationship from meeting somebody of this site and she was everything and more than I could of ever wanted and everything was great until I found she had been using the site again behind my back completely ruined everything and has destroyed my trust with people from the site I understand not everyone will do the same but how do you know as in a relationship trust is everything

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By *egasus NobMan
over a year ago

Wandsworth

It is only double standard because it does not favour your agenda. You have to be realistic, the saying freak in the sheet woman on the street applies here. You have to know what part of the spectrum of datable you are in. The perception is something like a freak in the street, freak in the bed.

As you can see from the reply your experience is pretty similar to some of the women here so who should change the men or the women. There will always be a disparage of what the average men want out of dateable women and what average women want out of dateable men.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally, as my profile states,yes I'm looking for sex,but I'd like the friendship including going out chatting and company

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've met one asshole on fab a few years ago. He wanted to date me so I gave him a chance. Met 3x socially, only kissed and hugged. Then he stood me up the 4th time giving a stupid excuse. And accused me of sleeping with everyone on fab because this is a sex site... But he forgot he was on also on fab when we met...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Totally get what you're saying...BUT...just because I fancy someone enough to fuck them, doesn't mean I think we're compatible enough or will want to date them. Doesn'tmean I don't think they're good enough, they're just not for me. I don't need much in common with someone to have sex with them, mutual physical attraction, and the ability to laugh with them, that's about it. I'd need more to wanna date them.

So long as they're honest about not being interested in dating you, I see nothing wrong in that.

And I don't see it as a double standard at all, fucking and dating are two completely different things.

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By *rkeb3Man
over a year ago

east Lancashire road


"Totally get what you're saying...BUT...just because I fancy someone enough to fuck them, doesn't mean I think we're compatible enough or will want to date them. Doesn'tmean I don't think they're good enough, they're just not for me. I don't need much in common with someone to have sex with them, mutual physical attraction, and the ability to laugh with them, that's about it. I'd need more to wanna date them.

So long as they're honest about not being interested in dating you, I see nothing wrong in that.

And I don't see it as a double standard at all, fucking and dating are two completely different things."
this

And lower ur expectations especially the guys u meet outside fab its different world

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Totally get what you're saying...BUT...just because I fancy someone enough to fuck them, doesn't mean I think we're compatible enough or will want to date them. Doesn'tmean I don't think they're good enough, they're just not for me. I don't need much in common with someone to have sex with them, mutual physical attraction, and the ability to laugh with them, that's about it. I'd need more to wanna date them.

So long as they're honest about not being interested in dating you, I see nothing wrong in that.

And I don't see it as a double standard at all, fucking and dating are two completely different things."

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By *heekyFlirtyCoupleCouple
over a year ago

Stockport


""I'm single so use fab to scratch an itch."

quote from OP yet the OP seems to be complaining when a guy does the self same thing,I am on here to find some like minded people who want some fun with no strings therefore to fuck not to date. There are plenty of dating sites online if that's what you're looking for."

She also said

However, when I've met men doing the same. Here and on other dating sites it would seem because I'm doing this I'm not dateable.

I assumed she meant guys looking for dates, but using fab to scratch that itch in the meantime too, she wasn’t complaining about them doing that, just that because she does that they won’t date her! But they expect others to date them even though they are doing it (but they will obviously keep that a secret?)

I wasn’t looking for dates when I was on here as a single lady, but I did find men that were looking for a relationship on dating sites and fucking on Fab, two actually said that they would never like to be in a swinging relationship they were looking for a ‘normal’ girl not a slag! Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi OP

I'm a bit lost on this post. Read it several times but don't get it. What are you actually looking for?

Are you looking to date someone from fab or are you just wanting a regular partner?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


""I'm single so use fab to scratch an itch."

quote from OP yet the OP seems to be complaining when a guy does the self same thing,I am on here to find some like minded people who want some fun with no strings therefore to fuck not to date. There are plenty of dating sites online if that's what you're looking for.

She also said

However, when I've met men doing the same. Here and on other dating sites it would seem because I'm doing this I'm not dateable.

I assumed she meant guys looking for dates, but using fab to scratch that itch in the meantime too, she wasn’t complaining about them doing that, just that because she does that they won’t date her! But they expect others to date them even though they are doing it (but they will obviously keep that a secret?)

I wasn’t looking for dates when I was on here as a single lady, but I did find men that were looking for a relationship on dating sites and fucking on Fab, two actually said that they would never like to be in a swinging relationship they were looking for a ‘normal’ girl not a slag! Lol "

Thanks. You nailed it X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can't say I've heard it put so eloquently, but alot of the single guys we've met have said they couldn't swing with a partner. But they'll happily share someone elses.

I might be wrong but that seems the double standard you mention

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's because men tend to be insecure .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Men tend to be intimidated by women who are sexually open

They are scared that they will not be able to keep them.

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)


"There are some men who frequent sites like these happy to meet up & have sex with hundreds of women, but could never date them.

They don’t ever think about the fact that they are the male equivalent of these women on sites like this.

Sexually liberated, confident women scare & intimidate insecure men.

Don’t waste any of your precious time with them. Plenty of men who are secure enough within themselves to not have an issue with a woman’s sexual past/present."

I agree with you on this point, I lost count of the amount of times myself with my ex heard the phrase "if she was my girlfriend, I wouldn't let her...". Plenty of guys are willing to have sex with a sexually liberated woman but the idea of being in a relationship with one terrifies them.

To my mind, it's about control or fear that the lady will behave the same way as they do. The double standard of behaviour and expectation is rife, not to mention the insult to the person they're trying to get into bed!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"There are some men who frequent sites like these happy to meet up & have sex with hundreds of women, but could never date them.

They don’t ever think about the fact that they are the male equivalent of these women on sites like this.

Sexually liberated, confident women scare & intimidate insecure men.

Don’t waste any of your precious time with them. Plenty of men who are secure enough within themselves to not have an issue with a woman’s sexual past/present.

I agree with you on this point, I lost count of the amount of times myself with my ex heard the phrase "if she was my girlfriend, I wouldn't let her...". Plenty of guys are willing to have sex with a sexually liberated woman but the idea of being in a relationship with one terrifies them.

To my mind, it's about control or fear that the lady will behave the same way as they do. The double standard of behaviour and expectation is rife, not to mention the insult to the person they're trying to get into bed! "

Yes. That's exactly it.

I met a guy for coffee once. He was cheating. It never went further than that coffee date. I asked. If you cheat on your wife why not ask her to swing. So she has the same opportunity. He said because I couldn't handle it. I like having my cake and eating it.

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)


"But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!.

What he said

I said this last week on another thread, and got witch hunted. Sex site not dating!

It really depends what little clique of forumites seem to be online, Once one posts a disparaging reply the rest follow suit and start the witchhunt

"

I think that this site has multiple uses for lots of different people.

Personally I met my girlfriend on fab, it works great to meet people as there is no need or worry about sexual history. it's also a great way to meet others for casual encounters, the uses that you've described aren't mutually exclusive.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There are some men who frequent sites like these happy to meet up & have sex with hundreds of women, but could never date them.

They don’t ever think about the fact that they are the male equivalent of these women on sites like this.

Sexually liberated, confident women scare & intimidate insecure men.

Don’t waste any of your precious time with them. Plenty of men who are secure enough within themselves to not have an issue with a woman’s sexual past/present.

I agree with you on this point, I lost count of the amount of times myself with my ex heard the phrase "if she was my girlfriend, I wouldn't let her...". Plenty of guys are willing to have sex with a sexually liberated woman but the idea of being in a relationship with one terrifies them.

To my mind, it's about control or fear that the lady will behave the same way as they do. The double standard of behaviour and expectation is rife, not to mention the insult to the person they're trying to get into bed! "

Absolutely.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Men will lower their standards to get a fuck here. They often have sex with anyone on offer that in real life they wouldnt be seen with.

Thats a hard one on the ego.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Men will lower their standards to get a fuck here. They often have sex with anyone on offer that in real life they wouldnt be seen with.

Thats a hard one on the ego."

But isn’t that the other side of the coin of women who only go with guys they’d have no hope of meeting in real life?

That must also be hard on the ego of the many men who aren’t of that standard.

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

How do people find this stuff out? I don't stop the adonis mid fuck and ask "but would you date me?" I just enjoy myself.

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By *ediMan
over a year ago

Leeds


"Can't say I've heard it put so eloquently, but alot of the single guys we've met have said they couldn't swing with a partner. But they'll happily share someone elses.

I might be wrong but that seems the double standard you mention "

I understand you point, but theres a lot of conflicting standards on here, what can I say thats FAB for you

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By *xyzptlk088Man
over a year ago

Galway

The only double standard that truly exists is the fact that a 10 on fab is probably a 6 in the cold light of day (with some very obvious exceptions) therefore the standards of marking out of 10 are very superficial on here. P.S. I'm a fab 5

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By *empsey and hotpieceMan
over a year ago

North west


"So. The last 4 men I've met have thrown out the fab double standard. Fuckable not dateable.

I'm single so use fab to scratch an itch. But I'm looking for a regular partner. However, when I've met men doing the same. Here and on other dating sites it would seem because I'm doing this I'm not dateable.

This has thrown me a little bit.

Of course when I hear such dross I realise said person isn't worthy of my time. But having met some ladies off fab also in my situation, they've encountered the same double standard.

I don't really have a question as such. I just needed to get this outta my head

To think we've evolved. "

So ,, let me get this straight.

These guys use fab ,which is a swingers site, to meet swingers, and they profess to be swingers, but they don’t want a relationship with a woman who is a swinger?

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By *ibblingnewtWoman
over a year ago

by the sea

I think it’s because people don’t really want a partner to swing with they want a person that’s not going to want anyone else for a real rejationship l, meeting a swinger whilst they think it’s a good idea ultimately it is probably not want they really want

Plus you have also got to factor in many people will say absolutly anything to get sex

Or it could be you both are looking but just not really getting the connection & attraction for anything more than a sex meet, trying and wanting too hard normally means it’s not gonna happen

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By *heekyFlirtyCoupleCouple
over a year ago

Stockport


""I'm single so use fab to scratch an itch."

quote from OP yet the OP seems to be complaining when a guy does the self same thing,I am on here to find some like minded people who want some fun with no strings therefore to fuck not to date. There are plenty of dating sites online if that's what you're looking for.

She also said

However, when I've met men doing the same. Here and on other dating sites it would seem because I'm doing this I'm not dateable.

I assumed she meant guys looking for dates, but using fab to scratch that itch in the meantime too, she wasn’t complaining about them doing that, just that because she does that they won’t date her! But they expect others to date them even though they are doing it (but they will obviously keep that a secret?)

I wasn’t looking for dates when I was on here as a single lady, but I did find men that were looking for a relationship on dating sites and fucking on Fab, two actually said that they would never like to be in a swinging relationship they were looking for a ‘normal’ girl not a slag! Lol

Thanks. You nailed it X "

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By *ust PeachyWoman
over a year ago

Prestonish

I think a few theories have been meted out on this thread - and all are true of some people!

There are most definitely guys who - though they’re happy to share a guy’s wife or shag a woman who shagged elsewhere days earlier - are looking for a faithful, monogamous relationship when they ‘settle down!’ Ironically, in my experience they often come back a couple of years later - either newly single or behind their partners’ back - because monogamy isn’t actually for them!

Secondly - I’ve absolutely shagged incredibly hot young guys - often regularly - who wouldn’t dream of dating me in the real world - but neither would I date them!

I’ve met plenty of men on here willing to date me - lovely men that I’ve enjoyed meeting - but what I need from a relationship goes much further than the superficial attraction that I need to shag someone!

When I meet on here I don’t care how well read they are - how politically aware - whether they enjoy a great theatre performance as well as a concert or the gym!!

Essentially - my ‘list’ of requirements for a relationship is somewhat longer than my list of requirements for a fab shag - and I imagine it’s the same for the men of fab - hence they’d fuck people they wouldn’t date - just as I do regularly - but totally without malice!

I fully accept that lots of hot men want to shag a ‘milf’ - but not everyone wants to date one!

Similarly - I don’t want to date a guy who spends several hours a day in the gym and eats micro managed meals that don’t allow for nights out in restaurants - but I’ll happily fuck one fairly regularly!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve been told before by a guy I’ve met on here that despite being everything he was looking for he wouldn’t date me as I’ve fucked to many blokes.

It wasn’t what I was after so I wasn’t bothered but it did get me thinking about how blokes on here still want to date women who haven’t been with a lot of men even though they’ve been shagging their way through the site - definite double standards

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By *entakuruMan
over a year ago

Exeter


"Men will lower their standards to get a fuck here. They often have sex with anyone on offer that in real life they wouldnt be seen with.

Thats a hard one on the ego."

I think a lot of men feel pressured by family and peer group to select long term partners in order to present a certain image. Much as in years gone by, homosexual men would still marry women in order to satisfy society's requirements, so many men today who internalise society's messages about how women should look and act, may be sexually more attracted to a larger women with ink and piercings but when it comes to being out and about in public or round their family they want someone conventionally 'pretty', slim and as conventional as possible, despite that not being their true preference.

Which is sad. And I suppose living a lie like that is why they're the sort of bitter saddos that suddenly start insulting women's appearance who three minute earlier they were messaging for sex.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

It's interesting the replies given. There's no right or wrong. I'm grateful for the interaction X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So. The last 4 men I've met have thrown out the fab double standard. Fuckable not dateable.

I'm single so use fab to scratch an itch. But I'm looking for a regular partner. However, when I've met men doing the same. Here and on other dating sites it would seem because I'm doing this I'm not dateable.

This has thrown me a little bit.

Of course when I hear such dross I realise said person isn't worthy of my time. But having met some ladies off fab also in my situation, they've encountered the same double standard.

I don't really have a question as such. I just needed to get this outta my head

To think we've evolved. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think a few theories have been meted out on this thread - and all are true of some people!

There are most definitely guys who - though they’re happy to share a guy’s wife or shag a woman who shagged elsewhere days earlier - are looking for a faithful, monogamous relationship when they ‘settle down!’ Ironically, in my experience they often come back a couple of years later - either newly single or behind their partners’ back - because monogamy isn’t actually for them!

Secondly - I’ve absolutely shagged incredibly hot young guys - often regularly - who wouldn’t dream of dating me in the real world - but neither would I date them!

I’ve met plenty of men on here willing to date me - lovely men that I’ve enjoyed meeting - but what I need from a relationship goes much further than the superficial attraction that I need to shag someone!

When I meet on here I don’t care how well read they are - how politically aware - whether they enjoy a great theatre performance as well as a concert or the gym!!

Essentially - my ‘list’ of requirements for a relationship is somewhat longer than my list of requirements for a fab shag - and I imagine it’s the same for the men of fab - hence they’d fuck people they wouldn’t date - just as I do regularly - but totally without malice!

I fully accept that lots of hot men want to shag a ‘milf’ - but not everyone wants to date one!

Similarly - I don’t want to date a guy who spends several hours a day in the gym and eats micro managed meals that don’t allow for nights out in restaurants - but I’ll happily fuck one fairly regularly! "

Well said that lady!

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By *eading28Man
over a year ago

Reading


"I think a few theories have been meted out on this thread - and all are true of some people!

There are most definitely guys who - though they’re happy to share a guy’s wife or shag a woman who shagged elsewhere days earlier - are looking for a faithful, monogamous relationship when they ‘settle down!’ Ironically, in my experience they often come back a couple of years later - either newly single or behind their partners’ back - because monogamy isn’t actually for them!

Secondly - I’ve absolutely shagged incredibly hot young guys - often regularly - who wouldn’t dream of dating me in the real world - but neither would I date them!

I’ve met plenty of men on here willing to date me - lovely men that I’ve enjoyed meeting - but what I need from a relationship goes much further than the superficial attraction that I need to shag someone!

When I meet on here I don’t care how well read they are - how politically aware - whether they enjoy a great theatre performance as well as a concert or the gym!!

Essentially - my ‘list’ of requirements for a relationship is somewhat longer than my list of requirements for a fab shag - and I imagine it’s the same for the men of fab - hence they’d fuck people they wouldn’t date - just as I do regularly - but totally without malice!

I fully accept that lots of hot men want to shag a ‘milf’ - but not everyone wants to date one!

Similarly - I don’t want to date a guy who spends several hours a day in the gym and eats micro managed meals that don’t allow for nights out in restaurants - but I’ll happily fuck one fairly regularly! "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Men will lower their standards to get a fuck here. They often have sex with anyone on offer that in real life they wouldnt be seen with.

Thats a hard one on the ego.

I think a lot of men feel pressured by family and peer group to select long term partners in order to present a certain image. Much as in years gone by, homosexual men would still marry women in order to satisfy society's requirements, so many men today who internalise society's messages about how women should look and act, may be sexually more attracted to a larger women with ink and piercings but when it comes to being out and about in public or round their family they want someone conventionally 'pretty', slim and as conventional as possible, despite that not being their true preference.

Which is sad. And I suppose living a lie like that is why they're the sort of bitter saddos that suddenly start insulting women's appearance who three minute earlier they were messaging for sex. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Men on here are so horned up they fuck other men even.

You see numerous 'i love bbw' threads but they look at is as an easy fuck.

They dont want to be seen with bbws.

Stand up against these losers girls!!

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By *UNCHBOXMan
over a year ago

folkestone


"Men will lower their standards to get a fuck here. They often have sex with anyone on offer that in real life they wouldnt be seen with.

Thats a hard one on the ego."

Some men will, not all. I've turned down more meets than people I've met for various reasons.

I had the offer to meet a married woman who I had met (on another site) as part of a couple behind her husbands back. But I turned it down because I've been cheated on twice (non swinging), and out of principle I won't do it to anyone else.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Miss here and I was a single female on here and Mr was a single male, we both attended a swingers party and absolutely hit it off, more so I enjoyed more of him in my car to drop him home because can't let a talented man walk home now

We've been together since and last year spent Christmas together.

You'll be surprised who you meet on here, some people have double standards but then someone can surprise you when you're not looking for anything more than filth and now

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

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By *opite_xWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham

I’m in exactly the same situation, but I wouldn’t even think of looking for a guy to date from here? I think a lot (not all) men would say pretty much anything for a meet. Although around me plenty of the guys in pof are also on here looking for different things (on there ‘looking for a relationship’ on here ‘strictly NSA’)

I’ve had so many offers from men trying to ‘save me’ from this site...

It seems by being on here men think we’re not ‘girlfriend’ material and yet most of my friends have slept with more people than me just by going out every Saturday night haha

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By *ohn321300Man
over a year ago

M

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. My opinion is they're probably missing out on some great women and definitely some fantastic fun.

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By * Star FilthMan
over a year ago

staplehurst


" "

I'm in the same camp, I would like a regular relationship but have found myself being judged for playing while looking for it, yet I'm happy and comfortable in myself and the lifestyle to accept someone the same but they don't want you because you play..hey ho maybe one day..x

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By *andy cane321Couple
over a year ago

Aylesbury

For me (Mr) pre requisite to dating was to insure a partner was aware of my swinging lifestyle and either join in the fun of it wouldn't work, sharing is caring

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By *arl17Man
over a year ago

Central Portugal

[Removed by poster at 09/05/19 01:14:34]

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By *arl17Man
over a year ago

Central Portugal


"I’m in exactly the same situation, but I wouldn’t even think of looking for a guy to date from here? I think a lot (not all) men would say pretty much anything for a meet. Although around me plenty of the guys in pof are also on here looking for different things (on there ‘looking for a relationship’ on here ‘strictly NSA’)

I’ve had so many offers from men trying to ‘save me’ from this site...

It seems by being on here men think we’re not ‘girlfriend’ material and yet most of my friends have slept with more people than me just by going out every Saturday night haha"

I’ll try again as our posts got mixed up...

Tinder is the same double standard... some woman are honest but the vast majority of men are not ... Prefer here as most people are honest except the ‘straight’ guys lol xx

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By *rontier PsychiatristMan
over a year ago

Coventry

Don't think it's double standards, more A lack of two way compatibility. IMO it's a lot easier to find causal sex than love. I tried on line dating, dated lots of great women who on paper where very good and would be a great partner to anyone. But alas they were all missing something. I don't know what, let's call it x factor. Then I come on FAB and by pure chance I met the one for me. My point is finding people for NSA is easy but finding the one were the feeling is mutral is very difficult. So I would say either they too were looking for more but you didn't quite have what they were looking for to have something more. Or they were telling porkies about being open to more to widen their net and attract more women.

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By *etro1940sCouple
over a year ago

Kingston upon Thames


"But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!.

What he said

I said this last week on another thread, and got witch hunted. Sex site not dating!

It really depends what little clique of forumites seem to be online, Once one posts a disparaging reply the rest follow suit and start the witchhunt

I think that this site has multiple uses for lots of different people.

Personally I met my girlfriend on fab, it works great to meet people as there is no need or worry about sexual history. it's also a great way to meet others for casual encounters, the uses that you've described aren't mutually exclusive. "

dating sites are one thing, Fab another, there is some overlap but more the exception than the rule for probably all but the more intrepid

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So. The last 4 men I've met have thrown out the fab double standard. Fuckable not dateable.

I'm single so use fab to scratch an itch. But I'm looking for a regular partner. However, when I've met men doing the same. Here and on other dating sites it would seem because I'm doing this I'm not dateable.

This has thrown me a little bit.

Of course when I hear such dross I realise said person isn't worthy of my time. But having met some ladies off fab also in my situation, they've encountered the same double standard.

I don't really have a question as such. I just needed to get this outta my head

To think we've evolved. "

I don’t mean this to sound personal, and I definitely don’t mean it as such - but maybe those men just don’t want to date you, and then find any excuse. There’s a big difference between comparability in sex and compatibility in a relationship.

I bet if they found someone they really fell head over heels for then they wouldn’t care if they had been on here.

I’m not saying this as anything bad against you, but from a mans point of view I can imagine them saying the above as a way of letting someone down gently.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

*compatability

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By *uckslut and MCouple
over a year ago

Poole


"So. The last 4 men I've met have thrown out the fab double standard. Fuckable not dateable.

I'm single so use fab to scratch an itch. But I'm looking for a regular partner. However, when I've met men doing the same. Here and on other dating sites it would seem because I'm doing this I'm not dateable.

This has thrown me a little bit.

Of course when I hear such dross I realise said person isn't worthy of my time. But having met some ladies off fab also in my situation, they've encountered the same double standard.

I don't really have a question as such. I just needed to get this outta my head

To think we've evolved. "

Regular partner? Do you mean long term vanilla relationship? Or reg swing partner?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So. The last 4 men I've met have thrown out the fab double standard. Fuckable not dateable.

I'm single so use fab to scratch an itch. But I'm looking for a regular partner. However, when I've met men doing the same. Here and on other dating sites it would seem because I'm doing this I'm not dateable.

This has thrown me a little bit.

Of course when I hear such dross I realise said person isn't worthy of my time. But having met some ladies off fab also in my situation, they've encountered the same double standard.

I don't really have a question as such. I just needed to get this outta my head

To think we've evolved.

I don’t mean this to sound personal, and I definitely don’t mean it as such - but maybe those men just don’t want to date you, and then find any excuse. There’s a big difference between comparability in sex and compatibility in a relationship.

I bet if they found someone they really fell head over heels for then they wouldn’t care if they had been on here.

I’m not saying this as anything bad against you, but from a mans point of view I can imagine them saying the above as a way of letting someone down gently."

I'm sure there are those out there that this applies to. But a lot of the single guys we have met have openly said they couldn't share a partner. But will happily share another mans wife. And a few of them have been playing away so definitely double standards.

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By *lanemikeMan
over a year ago

Bolton


"So. The last 4 men I've met have thrown out the fab double standard. Fuckable not dateable.

I'm single so use fab to scratch an itch. But I'm looking for a regular partner. However, when I've met men doing the same. Here and on other dating sites it would seem because I'm doing this I'm not dateable.

This has thrown me a little bit.

Of course when I hear such dross I realise said person isn't worthy of my time. But having met some ladies off fab also in my situation, they've encountered the same double standard.

I don't really have a question as such. I just needed to get this outta my head

To think we've evolved.

I don’t mean this to sound personal, and I definitely don’t mean it as such - but maybe those men just don’t want to date you, and then find any excuse. There’s a big difference between comparability in sex and compatibility in a relationship.

I bet if they found someone they really fell head over heels for then they wouldn’t care if they had been on here.

I’m not saying this as anything bad against you, but from a mans point of view I can imagine them saying the above as a way of letting someone down gently.

I'm sure there are those out there that this applies to. But a lot of the single guys we have met have openly said they couldn't share a partner. But will happily share another mans wife. And a few of them have been playing away so definitely double standards. "

That does not seem fair or reasonable...

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By *ensualMan
over a year ago

Sutton


"So. The last 4 men I've met have thrown out the fab double standard. Fuckable not dateable.

I'm single so use fab to scratch an itch. But I'm looking for a regular partner. However, when I've met men doing the same. Here and on other dating sites it would seem because I'm doing this I'm not dateable.

This has thrown me a little bit.

Of course when I hear such dross I realise said person isn't worthy of my time. But having met some ladies off fab also in my situation, they've encountered the same double standard.

I don't really have a question as such. I just needed to get this outta my head

To think we've evolved.

I don’t mean this to sound personal, and I definitely don’t mean it as such - but maybe those men just don’t want to date you, and then find any excuse. There’s a big difference between comparability in sex and compatibility in a relationship.

I bet if they found someone they really fell head over heels for then they wouldn’t care if they had been on here.

I’m not saying this as anything bad against you, but from a mans point of view I can imagine them saying the above as a way of letting someone down gently.

I'm sure there are those out there that this applies to. But a lot of the single guys we have met have openly said they couldn't share a partner. But will happily share another mans wife. And a few of them have been playing away so definitely double standards. "

It is only a double standard if the person currently has a partner otherwise it is personal choices.

If I am in a relationship I am monogamous, if I am not in a relationship then all bets are off.

I think your concern is the men who somehow think they are superior because they would not share their partner and make you feel they are taking advantage of you.

Not all single men are like that, some of us, when single, just enjoy the interaction because there is no moral superiority in relationship personal choices.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It doesn't apply to all.

We met through fab and a local club. Within a year we were living together and married the following year. We are still swinging and couldn't be happier!

I think the problem is that there are just so many men playing away on the site it puts them all in a bad light.

Perhaps fab need to tighten up on the number of would be single men joining.

Having said that some of the women are just as bad!

We are a fickle lot.

Perhaps just don't use it a as dating site.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It doesn't apply to all.

We met through fab and a local club. Within a year we were living together and married the following year. We are still swinging and couldn't be happier!

I think the problem is that there are just so many men playing away on the site it puts them all in a bad light.

Perhaps fab need to tighten up on the number of would be single men joining.

Having said that some of the women are just as bad!

We are a fickle lot.

Perhaps just don't use it a as dating site."

What do you mean don't use it as a dating site? You met on the site.

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By *adame 2SwordsWoman
over a year ago

Victoria, London

I'm like you in dating no-mans land. So I fuck em, but would never date them

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"Snap.

Men seem to want a women who willing to play. But minute they find one. Oh u can't play with others. "

Oh yes, I've had this a couple of times. They want exclusive but it doesn't apply to them

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By *pice of life 79Man
over a year ago

lincoln, sleaford , grantham , nottingham

I’m single I’d I’d most definitely date someone off fab I enjoyed swinging more as a couple

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do believe that its not really a double standard more an insecurity. Being on this site and meeting someone else on this site and trying to be exclusive is hard as im finding out. There is always that niggle in the back of both your minds that they are on here when you are not and vice versa. It can get in the way x

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By *heHookyMonsterMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

It's pathetic for my money. I can't abide the '....any hole's a goal' brigade. Surely if someone is attractive enough to be in bed with they're good enough to be proud to be seen with??? Shallow fellas! I'm embarrassed to be a bloke on here for once.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It's pathetic for my money. I can't abide the '....any hole's a goal' brigade. Surely if someone is attractive enough to be in bed with they're good enough to be proud to be seen with??? Shallow fellas! I'm embarrassed to be a bloke on here for once.

"

I've fucked people I wouldn't want to be seen in public with.

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By *heHookyMonsterMan
over a year ago

Liverpool


"It's pathetic for my money. I can't abide the '....any hole's a goal' brigade. Surely if someone is attractive enough to be in bed with they're good enough to be proud to be seen with??? Shallow fellas! I'm embarrassed to be a bloke on here for once.

I've fucked people I wouldn't want to be seen in public with. "

Fair enough. Your call.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"It's pathetic for my money. I can't abide the '....any hole's a goal' brigade. Surely if someone is attractive enough to be in bed with they're good enough to be proud to be seen with??? Shallow fellas! I'm embarrassed to be a bloke on here for once.

I've fucked people I wouldn't want to be seen in public with.

Fair enough. Your call. "

If they won't meet me in public first I don't meet them. Simple. Safety first.

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By *wholeLotOfRosieWoman
over a year ago

Pontypridd


"It's pathetic for my money. I can't abide the '....any hole's a goal' brigade. Surely if someone is attractive enough to be in bed with they're good enough to be proud to be seen with??? Shallow fellas! I'm embarrassed to be a bloke on here for once.

"

It’s not necessarily about being attractive. I’ve fucked guys from here that I wouldn’t date. Their lives are too complex or they have kids or we don’t have anything in common other than sex. I also see some guys regularly. Still wouldn’t date them, but for a few hours we have a great time. There’s loads of reasons people might not want a relationship.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL


"But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!.

What he said

I said this last week on another thread, and got witch hunted. Sex site not dating! "

Swinging site not sex site.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!.

It can be both for many people. There’s nothing in the rules to say that this site cannot be used by people for dating, infact many use it successfully. "

Of course it can be used however they like, but they also need to remember others use it very differently and filter very differently. They may avoid those who use it as a dating site, like I avoid those who use it a fuck and move on to the next.

To the OP, I actually don't see what you mean by double standards. I wouldn't date anyone on here because I wouldn't want to pursue the swing idea with someone I'm looking at dating. When I start dating then I'll leave this site. If I considered someone Frome this site to date then there would be the greater pressure to return to this and I know that would then end the relationship as it's not what I'd be looking for. I'm not expecting many to understand that but that just reinforces my thinking on it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!.

What he said

I said this last week on another thread, and got witch hunted. Sex site not dating!

Swinging site not sex site. "

Most are on here for sex, not swinging.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I do believe that its not really a double standard more an insecurity. Being on this site and meeting someone else on this site and trying to be exclusive is hard as im finding out. There is always that niggle in the back of both your minds that they are on here when you are not and vice versa. It can get in the way x "

I agree but don't see it as any insecurity, rather, incompatible with what I'd be looking for when in a relationship. Some will be happy in a relationship and their partner off elsewhere with others. I wouldn't want a swinging relationship.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!."

It is. But it doesnt mean that some can't turn it into that, if both are happy to progress beyond sex. Some couples have met through ths site. Not all continue to swing either

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!.

What he said

I said this last week on another thread, and got witch hunted. Sex site not dating!

It’s actually a swingers site, however that doesn’t mean everyone uses it as such.

And as I said before, there is nothing in the rules to say people cannot use this site for dating.

If people who choose to use this site differently to you, bother you, block them.

Everyone is entitled to use Fab as they see fit. "

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics

Sometimes in a club, some erotic situation can just develop, it wouldn't necessarily mean that I want to date the people involved, but we can still share a sensuous sexual moment together.

I might not have even spent enough time with them to know if I would date them or not, it can be something that just happens spontaneously, and is exciting for that time right then.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Op, you should read the thread posted earlier today on this forum called 'just sex'

https://www.fabswingers.com/forum/swingers/879945

It's a woman with the exact opposite of your problem; she wants just sex but the men want more.

You could swap notes, or meets even.

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics

I really don't want just sex, I like socialising and even if more develops it doesn't necessarily mean it will go all the way, it could just be some sensual touching excetera. But what I'm saying is I don't always think about dating people if the situation goes like that, I'm just in it for the minute.

I might do a shot of something that I don't necessarily want a whole bottle of it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's not just on here and it's not restricted to the ladies. I was told I was sexually very compatible but would not fit in to her lifestyle or friends etc. It is what it is I guess, Human nature.

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By *heHookyMonsterMan
over a year ago

Liverpool


"It's pathetic for my money. I can't abide the '....any hole's a goal' brigade. Surely if someone is attractive enough to be in bed with they're good enough to be proud to be seen with??? Shallow fellas! I'm embarrassed to be a bloke on here for once.

It’s not necessarily about being attractive. I’ve fucked guys from here that I wouldn’t date. Their lives are too complex or they have kids or we don’t have anything in common other than sex. I also see some guys regularly. Still wouldn’t date them, but for a few hours we have a great time. There’s loads of reasons people might not want a relationship. "

OK, fair point. I'm a bloke - I'm bound to be wrong!

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By *entakuruMan
over a year ago

Exeter


"But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!.

What he said

I said this last week on another thread, and got witch hunted. Sex site not dating!

Swinging site not sex site. "

Once you read enough veris the 'sex site' part is a fair assessment IMO.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So. The last 4 men I've met have thrown out the fab double standard. Fuckable not dateable.

I'm single so use fab to scratch an itch. But I'm looking for a regular partner. However, when I've met men doing the same. Here and on other dating sites it would seem because I'm doing this I'm not dateable.

This has thrown me a little bit.

Of course when I hear such dross I realise said person isn't worthy of my time. But having met some ladies off fab also in my situation, they've encountered the same double standard.

I don't really have a question as such. I just needed to get this outta my head

To think we've evolved. "

They're a funny bunch online

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"But this is a swinging site for enjoyable sex not a dating site long term emotional stuff.!!.

What he said

I said this last week on another thread, and got witch hunted. Sex site not dating!

Swinging site not sex site.

Once you read enough veris the 'sex site' part is a fair assessment IMO. "

Totally

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd consider dating a woman from Fab. The difficulty is in finding a woman local enough, to know well enough, for it to develop into something.

I think my ideal would be a woman from Fab. Who knows?

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

The ironic thing is that the guy who won't date a girl from here will probably be back in a couple of years asking how to get his wife into swinging,

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By *heekyFlirtyCoupleCouple
over a year ago

Stockport


"The ironic thing is that the guy who won't date a girl from here will probably be back in a couple of years asking how to get his wife into swinging, "

Very true!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As I am probably one of he "old guys" on the site, I'd like to add my 2 cents. I would love to date someone (a lady) I met through this site. For staters, we have one thing in common. And second, when you get older, and in touch with your mortality, you get your head out of your ass, and appreciate the oppurtunity of meeting someone special.

And your priorities change.

https://1drv.ms/u/s!Agj785Loh6xW1MN7Hay1jatL7yBT7w.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I really do get the regular play mate thing. It's one thing having sex with someone but a friendship that brings the physical side of it can be something intimate and filthy at the same time

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By *heHookyMonsterMan
over a year ago

Liverpool


"I really do get the regular play mate thing. It's one thing having sex with someone but a friendship that brings the physical side of it can be something intimate and filthy at the same time"

This definitely!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The ironic thing is that the guy who won't date a girl from here will probably be back in a couple of years asking how to get his wife into swinging, "

I'd say the opposite would be more common, depends on their reasons for not dating a fabber, though I'd agree there would be a few who would as you say.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Totally datable!

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By *arakiss12TV/TS
over a year ago

Bedford

Guys can be fickle as ladies sometimes. Human nature has a funny way of expressing itself.

Honesty is the best policy, if he won't date then better to nip it in the bud sooner than later.

I get a lot of dating offers, but take it as a whim rather than a serious part of a meet.

As I'm not looking for an a ltr, I state that in my profile, vice versa if in need of a dating relationship.

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By *arakiss12TV/TS
over a year ago

Bedford


"As I am probably one of he "old guys" on the site, I'd like to add my 2 cents. I would love to date someone (a lady) I met through this site. For staters, we have one thing in common. And second, when you get older, and in touch with your mortality, you get your head out of your ass, and appreciate the oppurtunity of meeting someone special.

And your priorities change.

https://1drv.ms/u/s!Agj785Loh6xW1MN7Hay1jatL7yBT7w."

I totally agree. Free your mind and your ass will follow.

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By *entakuruMan
over a year ago

Exeter

It occurred to me as I was reading the thread, I think a lot of guys have the opposite problem. That's to say, women will date us, because we're decent sorts and they like the idea of long term monogamous relationships with us because we're emotionally literate and so on. But, we get passed over for casual sex in favour of the exact type of bloke that most women wouldn't want to be in an LTR with because they're self centred image-obsessed commitment-phobes....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It occurred to me as I was reading the thread, I think a lot of guys have the opposite problem. That's to say, women will date us, because we're decent sorts and they like the idea of long term monogamous relationships with us because we're emotionally literate and so on. But, we get passed over for casual sex in favour of the exact type of bloke that most women wouldn't want to be in an LTR with because they're self centred image-obsessed commitment-phobes.... "

Good point and true. Bad boy for sex, nice guy for relationship. A generalisation but has some truth to it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honest answer for op, men often have differing and higher standards for relationships. Sex is a small part of a relationship.

Men will often shag women, who they would not want to be seen in public with or have a relationship with.

So not double standards, 2 different things in comparison. Sorry for the very honest response.

Good luck op ??

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By *xyzptlk088Man
over a year ago

Galway

Straight up I've had meets on here where I shagged just because it was on offer. Some of those I'd meet in a social setting others I wouldn't. I'd safely say that rings true for just about anyone that's honest with themselves on here.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"The ironic thing is that the guy who won't date a girl from here will probably be back in a couple of years asking how to get his wife into swinging,

Very true! "

This made me chuckle

Not to mention sweet innocent Mandy may be on here but not as honest.

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By *xyzptlk088Man
over a year ago

Galway

No point wasting a horn.

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By *pertureTV/TS
over a year ago

New Ferry, wirral in stockings and sussies

I met a girl some years back on a different site, we dated for a while but it fizzled out, mainly due to the fact our only common interest was sex, relationships need more than just amazing orgasms.

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