FabSwingers.com forum: Safe sex and check ups

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Now we all know that where you site on this is your own business but following up from a comment on another thread I just wanted to say this.

PLEASE.. for the love of god and respect for yourself and others.. DONT THINK that playing safe means you dont need regular check ups..

The comment was if your careful why do you need regular check ups..

THAT TO ME.. is more dangerous than the likes of myself that admit that at times we play bare... but we are regulary checked.

Please how ever you play.. get checked as often as your health service recomends..

Cali

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By *ath-N-DelCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow area

Well said Cali..x

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By *sa fun bradfordMan
over a year ago

bradford/leeds

i have check ups every 3 months for my own safety and peace of mind

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

I love check ups, kinda like a meet to me... a guy or lady doctor touching my cock.

happy days.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They tell you all that when you go there, they say come every 6 months or if a man didnt use a condom, go there two weeks after having sex.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I love check ups, kinda like a meet to me... a guy or lady doctor touching my cock.

happy days....."

They are usually nice and friendly too.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"I love check ups, kinda like a meet to me... a guy or lady doctor touching my cock.

happy days.....

They are usually nice and friendly too."

totally agree..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be honest it depends on how often I play had my first meet in a few months last Saturday and had my first check up of the year last week. And always tend to go for check up after I have been to chams or tease. I go about 4 times a year and that suits me. If I played more I would go more.

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i go every 3mths cos as we are all well aware condoms only protect from some not all std's.

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By *edangel_2013Woman
over a year ago

southend

"They tell you all that when you go there, they say come every 6 months or if a man didnt use a condom, go there two weeks after having sex. "

Mine tell me that if a condom breaks, to wait for 12 weeks before I go, because some things don't show up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I love check ups, kinda like a meet to me... a guy or lady doctor touching my cock.

happy days....."

Lol see peeps, those of you who moan about not getting meets, there's always a silver lining.

I agree Cali, you are responsible for health checks and its excellent advice, people always think it will never happen to them, they wouldn't possibly catch anything. Its always best to be sure

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I only posted this as I was shocked at the venom towards those that play bare.. but then the ignorance of thinking that if you are careful you dont need regular check ups.

Because I play how I do.. I do go more often than most.. I also think that most of the time I have More meets than most..but I take great responsibility for my sexual health..

I think that those that arent going because they think that using a condom means they are being careful... well that is where the real danger lies.

Cali

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

I would hazard a guess that if you asked who went for check ups and there was data available to who actually did go.... there would be a difference.

just a gut feel... no data to support... no offence to anyone and most certainly not pointed at anyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I only posted this as I was shocked at the venom towards those that play bare.. but then the ignorance of thinking that if you are careful you dont need regular check ups.

Because I play how I do.. I do go more often than most.. I also think that most of the time I have More meets than most..but I take great responsibility for my sexual health..

I think that those that arent going because they think that using a condom means they are being careful... well that is where the real danger lies.

Cali "

Condoms are not 100% safe only true sfe sex is no sex plus they can split or break well said Cali.

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By *isub69Man
over a year ago

Epsom

I really should go for a check up at some point. I only play safe but not with oral. I know that you can still catch certain sti's just through oral etc.

Time to book myself in I think.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cali.

please may i ask a question??

please don't take it that i am judging anyone or am for or against how people play be it bareback or safe, it IS just a question.

If, after a checkup, you found that you have got some sort of std that meant, basically, you were going to die from it, what would you do/how would you feel, and, would you regret your decision to play bareback??

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Cali.

please may i ask a question??

please don't take it that i am judging anyone or am for or against how people play be it bareback or safe, it IS just a question.

no.. I wouldnt regret it.. same as if I had a crash from the fact I like to drive highspeed cars... Its a risk we are prepared to take...

Lets face it you can die from eating the wrong food.. there are so many things.. I would just hope that due to my frequent check ups and sensible safety measures that no one else would be effected.

We are all going to die.. only thing certain in life.. so I intend to live my life to the full..

It by the way is something my Master and I talk about Lots and constantly reevaluate..

Cali

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cali.

please may i ask a question??

please don't take it that i am judging anyone or am for or against how people play be it bareback or safe, it IS just a question.

no.. I wouldnt regret it.. same as if I had a crash from the fact I like to drive highspeed cars... Its a risk we are prepared to take...

Lets face it you can die from eating the wrong food.. there are so many things.. I would just hope that due to my frequent check ups and sensible safety measures that no one else would be effected.

We are all going to die.. only thing certain in life.. so I intend to live my life to the full..

It by the way is something my Master and I talk about Lots and constantly reevaluate..

Cali"

thank you for a polite answer,

if i may ask one more question??

how do you evaluate who you are playing with, whether they are "clean" or not?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

thank you for a polite answer,

if i may ask one more question??

how do you evaluate who you are playing with, whether they are "clean" or not?"

it tends to be regular partners.. So not going to go to a club and play bare so to speak..

We just tend to use common sense and gut feelings.. of course I know just being clean doenst mean you are clean.. but.. more likely lol

To be fair.. how many hear got their regular partner screened before bareback sex.

Cali

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

thank you for a polite answer,

if i may ask one more question??

how do you evaluate who you are playing with, whether they are "clean" or not?

it tends to be regular partners.. So not going to go to a club and play bare so to speak..

We just tend to use common sense and gut feelings.. of course I know just being clean doenst mean you are clean.. but.. more likely lol

To be fair.. how many hear got their regular partner screened before bareback sex.

Cali "

good answers cali

thanks for indulging me lol xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

good answers cali

thanks for indulging me lol xx"

Your welcome.. I know that safe sex has been done to death.. I just felt that someone kicking off about Bareback on a thread that was actually about with your partner not others..and then stating that if you were careful that why did you need regular checks, just made me think OMG...

Are there still people that think that.

Cali

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

a question I have always wondered is:

and I am not pointing fingers at anyone and not judging, just wondering.

does it make a difference if you play bareback as a single person with no responsibility versus a person who has children. Surely as a parent, people would minimise all potential risks to their well being to ensure they are here to raise their loved ones. I often read people say their number one priority in life is their kids and don't doubt that is fact. Do they consider the potential impact to their kids. God forbid anything happens.

again, not pointing, just asking

and refer to my previous bareback answers... have always said, it is personal choice, am just interested as a single guy with ZERO responsibility.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

good answers cali

thanks for indulging me lol xx

Are there still people that think that.

Cali "

strange thing was also .... all the ranting about being safe in everything ... they are both smokers

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I have 6 kids.. I do many things that people would say are a risk.. yet I have also given up riding a motorbike due to a few near miss's.

Yes there is a risk with BB sex.. but the fact is I am very unlikely to catch something life threatening.. and I know someone that in the height of aids becoming known that transmitted it during a blood transfusion.. now that was a long time ago.. and they are still around today.. Even managed to have a child who does not have hiv ( it is possible.. )

So I see it as no worse than the fact I could get cancer from eating or drinking things.. or having a mobile phone..

I as a hobby like to go and take a fast car flat out on a track.. and yes its safeish... but people still die on tracks..

The thing is.. I could catch these things from just meeting someone new romantically... unless I stopped having sex all together would I not be at risk..

Cali

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"I have 6 kids.. I do many things that people would say are a risk.. yet I have also given up riding a motorbike due to a few near miss's.

So I see it as no worse than the fact I could get cancer from eating or drinking things.. or having a mobile phone..

I as a hobby like to go and take a fast car flat out on a track.. and yes its safeish... but people still die on tracks..

The thing is.. I could catch these things from just meeting someone new romantically... unless I stopped having sex all together would I not be at risk..

Cali "

cool, thank you

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

"I would hazard a guess that if you asked who went for check ups and there was data available to who actually did go.... there would be a difference.

just a gut feel... no data to support... no offence to anyone and most certainly not pointed at anyone."

I totally agree View, anyone can claim that they visit clinics, but until people start turning up with results for meets it means very little....again not aimed at anyone in particular and not wanting to cause offence but it means very little.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I would hazard a guess that if you asked who went for check ups and there was data available to who actually did go.... there would be a difference.

just a gut feel... no data to support... no offence to anyone and most certainly not pointed at anyone.

That's true. The only person you can trust is you and take care of your own safety with use of condoms and regular checks.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I would hazard a guess that if you asked who went for check ups and there was data available to who actually did go.... there would be a difference.

just a gut feel... no data to support... no offence to anyone and most certainly not pointed at anyone.

To be honest.. most places to cut costs.. only contact you again if there is a problem.. because its my doctors I use mostly.. The nurse rings me and I pop down for my results.

I will be honest and admit the first time they called me and said....

" we need you to come in to discuss your test results" I about crapped myself.. lol

Cali

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

"I would hazard a guess that if you asked who went for check ups and there was data available to who actually did go.... there would be a difference.

just a gut feel... no data to support... no offence to anyone and most certainly not pointed at anyone.

To be honest.. most places to cut costs.. only contact you again if there is a problem.. because its my doctors I use mostly.. The nurse rings me and I pop down for my results.

I will be honest and admit the first time they called me and said....

" we need you to come in to discuss your test results" I about crapped myself.. lol

Cali "

You can have printed results if you wish to purchase them, under the freedom of information act.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

You can have printed results if you wish to purchase them, under the freedom of information act.

I am not going to pay for results lol

If I use the GUM clinic they text you the results.. but its like a car mot. it was only valid at that moment.

Cali

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

good answers cali

thanks for indulging me lol xx

Are there still people that think that.

Cali

strange thing was also .... all the ranting about being safe in everything ... they are both smokers

Lol! Go figure!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Condoms don't guarantee safe sex anymore... a friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman's husband

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This needed to be said! Well done.

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

"Condoms don't guarantee safe sex anymore... a friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman's husband

Hahaha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I certainly agree with View that I think a lot of people talk the talk but do not actually go and have regular sexual health screenings. Its obvious from some statements people come out with and they have no idea of the procedure etc.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

lots of swingers clubs have mobile STI clinics now, i know 3 clubs that hold STIs clinics once a month, theres really no excuse for not going, chameleons have one every month on a monday, you dont have to pay to go in if your just going for the clinic you can just go, get tested and leave

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

make like the x files and trust no-one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have been twice to Newport! As I am having a fling and here with lover not hubby and was honest about it at the clinic, I felt the glare of the nurse! She was very disapproving! Am not looking forward to another visit! May swap and go to Cardiff! Maybe there I should lie and say its hubby I play with!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah, I admitted I swing and had to really down play the amount of people I had met in 3 months because there was definitely some judging going on with the Dr! Very offputting. Now I just fib but insist on a full screen every 3-4 months. And I am scary safe too. But you never know. I have always gone for screenings when entering into a new relationship too if having unprotected sex and insist my partner does the same.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can I ask, is a GUM clinic anonymous or do they report on your medical file?

I'm thinking about life insurance risk etc. and having the same Dr as other family members

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"Can I ask, is a GUM clinic anonymous or do they report on your medical file?

I'm thinking about life insurance risk etc. and having the same Dr as other family members"

anonymous

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Yeah, I admitted I swing and had to really down play the amount of people I had met in 3 months because there was definitely some judging going on with the Dr! Very offputting. Now I just fib but insist on a full screen every 3-4 months. And I am scary safe too. But you never know. I have always gone for screenings when entering into a new relationship too if having unprotected sex and insist my partner does the same."

thats a shame.. my doctor I think is not sure how serious I am being.. I told her one month that we were having a slow month as I only just hit double figures and she just laughed..

THe clinic are great.. but then they see a lot of working girls there too... and they I guess are not there to judge.

Cali

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It was the GUM clinic local to me actually too. Not sure what my proper dr would say

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've been back and forth to hospitals loads this past few months, so I just get another check done every time they're poking around there

may as well.

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By *ellraisersCouple
over a year ago

Near Glasgow

If a condom splits and you're not using any other form of contraceptive it's important to see a GP straight away for the morning after pill. Waiting longer may result in an unwanted pregnancy.

Just a warning as earlier posts say wait 2 weeks or 12 weeks before being checked! Not just STIs that are unwanted.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If a condom splits and you're not using any other form of contraceptive it's important to see a GP straight away for the morning after pill. Waiting longer may result in an unwanted pregnancy.

Just a warning as earlier posts say wait 2 weeks or 12 weeks before being checked! Not just STIs that are unwanted."

good point.. I have mine covered with pill and implant hahaha..

cali

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By *all-Eddies QosCouple
over a year ago

wirral

I am waiting to hear back, longest 2 weeks Ever! Slightly off point but relevant too i think. I was talking to my ex (aka shithead) about him being a man whore.....at nearly 34 years of age has never been checked for s.t.i's and i asked why and he replied " i always relied on your tests" id not had a s.t.i test until we split up cos we were together for over twelve years and I never thought i needed to due to me being faithful, but by admitting he relied on my tests confirmed he had cheated! Anyway only tests i had were the ones you have while pregnant. Dunno if they are even checking for s.t.i's

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I had full sti screening when pregnant.. Hiv is a test they do routinly on pregnant women.

cali

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By *ohjaneCouple
over a year ago

south staffs

I know that safe sex has been done to death.. I just felt that someone kicking off about Bareback on a thread that was actually about with your partner not others..and then stating that if you were careful that why did you need regular checks, just made me think OMG...

Are there still people that think that.

Cali "

To answer your question, Cali; Yes there are. I speak to lots of men on here and every one gets the same question.

The number of guys who answer exactly that "but I always play safe . . " !! I would say it is near 60%. One told me that having a check-up just for the peace of mind of someone on this site was not a good enough reason. He last had one 18m ago and had met a number of people.

I get a fair bit of flack for asking guys directly, but the question is important and if it makes at least one more young guy go to the clinic, it is a positive.

Jane x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have been twice to Newport! As I am having a fling and here with lover not hubby and was honest about it at the clinic, I felt the glare of the nurse! She was very disapproving! Am not looking forward to another visit! May swap and go to Cardiff! Maybe there I should lie and say its hubby I play with!

i got the same attitude from my local clinic , very judgemental as i am married , she even gave me a lecture on the morals of my persuits ,

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By *ohjaneCouple
over a year ago

south staffs

GUM clinic staff is not there to sit in any kind of judgement of anyone. Their job is to take care of the people who go to get checked, whatever the reason for them going.

If they give a person grief they should be told the above, and a note should be passed to the manager of that clinic, or directly to the management of the hospital responsible for the clinic.

It is in the interest of the Healthcare Trust and of public health to make a visit to the GUM clinic as nice an experience as possible. If a nurse sniffs or looks down her nose at you, you will not rush to return, even if you needed to ! Bad news !!

Jane x

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By *all-Eddies QosCouple
over a year ago

wirral

"I had full sti screening when pregnant.. Hiv is a test they do routinly on pregnant women.

cali "
yes i know they check for hiv....dunno about the rest though...x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think what an amazing place this would be if we all had tests at the same time and could some how prove/post the results. There would be no need to worry about safe sex because that would be all there is. There could be some sort of intake policy with current test results to keep everyone else safe. In an ideal world I know!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Think what an amazing place this would be if we all had tests at the same time and could some how prove/post the results. There would be no need to worry about safe sex because that would be all there is. There could be some sort of intake policy with current test results to keep everyone else safe. In an ideal world I know!! "

Thing is the test results are only at that moment... you could be developing something that wont show till the next test.. and you could get something a few hours after the test.

Actually I am typing this while waiting to go in for mine lol.. already had my blood tests done though.

I am sure my doctor thinks I make it up..

cali

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By *otbodiesCouple
over a year ago

Berlin, germany

we get tested every 6 months - that was the decision we took before starting this.

We also never do bareback, or knowingly meet people who have bareback with non regular partners.

We used condoms with each other too until we got our first all clear test results

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By *nsatiable firebirdWoman
over a year ago

LEEDS

"They tell you all that when you go there, they say come every 6 months or if a man didnt use a condom, go there two weeks after having sex. "

Going two weeks after is no good. There is the risk of H.I.V so going to the clinic next day and taking the 3 tablets to kill any infection is a must for H.I.V and STD's. Two weeks is too late after bareback especially for H.I.V infection. Best off never going bareback. Its too dangerous.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

My doctor and clinic always says to come back again when its been two weeks if I go in after BB sex..

Never ever been offered tablets.. asked about contraception and if I need morning afterpill .. but I am well covered on that.

Cali

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By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria

[Removed by poster at 05/02/12 16:00:10]

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By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago

Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria

"They tell you all that when you go there, they say come every 6 months or if a man didnt use a condom, go there two weeks after having sex.

3 tablets to kill infection?????Never heard of that - morning after pill is usually 3 tablets isn't it???

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By *amschwingerzCouple
over a year ago

West

Just either dont tell them or make something up if your bothered about how they will judge you...and if someone does judge you then look down your nose at them...the pox knows no social barriers anyway..

I would have thought it was safer to get checked after every encounter..its worthless someone saving it up for three months if they are playing every week/other week etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i have check ups every 3 months for my own safety and peace of mind "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"lots of swingers clubs have mobile STI clinics now, i know 3 clubs that hold STIs clinics once a month, theres really no excuse for not going, chameleons have one every month on a monday, you dont have to pay to go in if your just going for the clinic you can just go, get tested and leave"

can i ask which clubs do this...i go to the gum clinic every 3 months, but have to take time off work to do it cos they only open during the day. been trying to find somewhere out of hours, but they only offer that to under 25's...anyone would thing you can't get an sti once you're older!!

also...just out of interest. have any of you been caught out, and have you told the people you have had sex with!! i play safe all the time, but have been caught once with chlamydia (all clear now!!)...i texted everyone who's number i still have and messaged all those with a profile and they all seemed surprised that i had told them! i was surprised at how many i prompted to get tested though...most of them came back and told me they were all clear fortunately, only one didn't reply so i'm guessing he was the source (or someone fibbed!!) x

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By *all-Eddies QosCouple
over a year ago

wirral

finally got results...only 6 days late!! god they know how to make you sweat!!! ALL CLEAR!! WHOOP!!! YEY!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My friend who was married got a std of her husband he cheated on her on hols so sometimes it doesn't matter if u urself use condoms coz u partner might not, at end of day were all adults n using condoms doesn't stop spread of pubic lice, herpes , and crabs

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By *scottMan
over a year ago

Uttoxeter

"Now we all know that where you site on this is your own business but following up from a comment on another thread I just wanted to say this.

PLEASE.. for the love of god and respect for yourself and others.. DONT THINK that playing safe means you dont need regular check ups..

The comment was if your careful why do you need regular check ups..

THAT TO ME.. is more dangerous than the likes of myself that admit that at times we play bare... but we are regulary checked.

Please how ever you play.. get checked as often as your health service recomends..

Cali "

Here here. Well said.

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