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Why do people hide verifications...

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Just as it says really...... Why do people hide verifications - everyone is control of the verifications they show so why hide them all... Don't know about anyone else but it always sets alarm bells ringing with us... 'what have they got to hide? etc' verifications are important to us as it shows people actually meet (not just cam / phone) and also if they are verified by obviously genuine people they are far less likely to be time wasters... Soooo why would any genuine players wanna hide them all??

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By *essesCouple
over a year ago

nottingham

We hid ours for a while, as we had a bit of a stalker issue! But do normally like to have them on show, so people can see we are genuine and we like to see others, to get an idea of them.

Lisa

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Because I can.

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By *eavy Metal BallzMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

Because its their business who they have or have not met.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hide them because I don't like people asking me about people I have met. So I just keep a select few on there.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Because its their business who they have or have not met. "

Fair enough - and I guess it's our choice that we wouldn't meet anyone who chooses to hide them!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Just as it says really...... Why do people hide verifications - "

Because it's none of your business... we only meet first time in clubs anyway, so if we arrange to meet elsewhere it will be somebody who already knows us.. therefore verifications are not important to us.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I hide them because I don't like people asking me about people I have met. So I just keep a select few on there. "

And that's our point - we can all show a few select ones and I totally see why people do that.... But to hide all??? Just says to us they probably don't have any genuine ones to show..........

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester


"Because its their business who they have or have not met.

Fair enough - and I guess it's our choice that we wouldn't meet anyone who chooses to hide them!"

I don't think I have ever read a forum post along the lines of "why won't people meet me just because I choose not to show my verifications"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

lol only because the title is too long

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A man i met once contacted me and asked me if he could see me, i said to him, how come you didnt leave me a verification then? next time i looked at his profile, he had them hidden. I do sometimes wonder why people hide them, thinking maybe they are married or something.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

One of the site functions is to hide verifications if you wish. Its entirely up to the individuals if they wish to hide their verifications or not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i hide mine because its my business , dont really agree with having loads and loads on show all the time if i chatting to someone and they worried im not who i say i am ill show veris , ill give them a number to call ill go on cam and ill send some pics other than actually meeting with them there aint much else i can do there . So verifications are not the be all and end all for me . What if a guy a couple of a woman has say 3 or 4 on show all looks good ....comes to the time when meeting and they dont turn up or are nothing like you expected , does that make it any better that the verifications were there to see ?

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Verifications are also important to me, it helps with my selection process but guess what, i just by pass any profiles im not interested in for whatever reason

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay


"I hide them because I don't like people asking me about people I have met. So I just keep a select few on there.

And that's our point - we can all show a few select ones and I totally see why people do that.... But to hide all??? Just says to us they probably don't have any genuine ones to show.........."

That's a massive assumption to make...

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I hide them because I don't like people asking me about people I have met. So I just keep a select few on there.

And that's our point - we can all show a few select ones and I totally see why people do that.... But to hide all??? Just says to us they probably don't have any genuine ones to show..........

That's a massive assumption to make..."

Yes it is... But no doubt more often than not true.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

all mine are hidden and will remain to be. i will display them for a few mins if someone requests to see them

i like to be discreet, dont think its anyones business who ive met

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

lets not kid ourselves reason people hide them is they are more than likely timewaisters pretending to be something there not

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

If you say so.

The thing is... why do you care?

You've already said you don't want to meet people who hide them... so what's the big deal?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I actually like veri's on profile's, with most you can read between the lines, it's what people don't say that speaks volumes!

Saying that we don't have all our veri's on there, just a few to prove we do actually meet people. Not over keen on profiles that have a 3page long list of veri's x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Has anyone had a bad veri,they would not show it wise up

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If you say so.

The thing is... why do you care?

You've already said you don't want to meet people who hide them... so what's the big deal?"

It's not that we care, we just wondered - its a question... Isn't that what forums are for??

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Because they can

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 27/01/12 18:22:46]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree with Polo, also I don't show all the verifications I might get from one person, to me its sufficient to perhaps show the first social meet one, then a play one, if they give me another one, I wouldn't bother showing it, so am quite specific on what I show. I don't think that those who don't show their verifications means they are not genuine, its their choice, as is mine to pick and choose

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

@ the reasons people think others hide their verifications

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have an ex on here so if he works out its me with a new profile again I dont want him checking out my meets and giving me hassle lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Has anyone had a bad veri,they would not show it wise up"

Illogical as if someone had a bad verification, they wouldn't show it anyway surely? For me if I have a bad meet, I wouldn't give them a verification at all

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By *evilwolfCouple
over a year ago

Leicestershire


"Because they can "

we didn't, until recently, and now we do...

Wolf

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have an ex on here so if he works out its me with a new profile again I dont want him checking out my meets and giving me hassle lol "

similar for me, my ex husband is on here

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester


"If you say so.

The thing is... why do you care?

You've already said you don't want to meet people who hide them... so what's the big deal?

It's not that we care, we just wondered - its a question... Isn't that what forums are for??"

It looks more like you were wondering if anyone else would agree with you rather than genuinely wondering why people make the choice not to display their verifications.... but may be that's just the phrasing you used.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The people in here who have a problem with profiles not showing their veris are making a lot of assumptions!!

I used to show my veris. But since getting shit from people on here, (and yes it was guys) either judging me or getting arsy about meeting other people instead of arranging with them, Ive found it easier and less hassle to hide all veris.

Like others have previously said, if ya dont like profiles with hidden veris, move onto the peeps who show em!!

simples!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If you say so.

The thing is... why do you care?

You've already said you don't want to meet people who hide them... so what's the big deal?

It's not that we care, we just wondered - its a question... Isn't that what forums are for??

It looks more like you were wondering if anyone else would agree with you rather than genuinely wondering why people make the choice not to display their verifications.... but may be that's just the phrasing you used."

Apologies for the phrasing, it was a genuine question rather than us looking for agreement on our thoughts..

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

Why do the Op's show so many verifications?......

Answer....for the same reason that some people don't show any verifications...BECAUSE THEY CAN

Personal choice.....

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

How ironic, just had a message from someone with no verifications after been on here a number of months! Think that's for another day though...!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I used to show my veris. But since getting shit from people on here, (and yes it was guys) either judging me or getting arsy about meeting other people instead of arranging with them, Ive found it easier and less hassle to hide all veris.

"

I too have noticed the tip of the iceberg of chinese-whispery-irresponsibility of some who resort to such practices, and am happy to remove the source of their inane and ludicrously incorrect musings. For those who are responsible enough to want to read kind words - those who meet us can draw up a chair at ours and read the glowing and ever extending list of verifications that we proudly own.

lol

Wolf

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hmmmmmm

this is an interesting one. I kind of think its up to an individual what they chose to say or show on their profile pages.

However, i have just had a quick peep at your profile and saw that you have may verifications. . . so the question is did you get out of bed the wrong side today?? lol

You are obviously having many succesful meets so why the issue?? Fresh pair of eyes maybe!

Lp xx

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By *lackCherryCouple
over a year ago

Bristol


"Just as it says really...... Why do people hide verifications - everyone is control of the verifications they show so why hide them all... Don't know about anyone else but it always sets alarm bells ringing with us... 'what have they got to hide? etc' verifications are important to us as it shows people actually meet (not just cam / phone) and also if they are verified by obviously genuine people they are far less likely to be time wasters... Soooo why would any genuine players wanna hide them all?? "

I agree it can be frustrating when you're browsing it always smacks to our suspicious mind of something to hide.

But before I get strung up by the posse you can use the site however you want just pointing out how it makes US fee when browsing.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Hmmmmmm

this is an interesting one. I kind of think its up to an individual what they chose to say or show on their profile pages.

However, i have just had a quick peep at your profile and saw that you have may verifications. . . so the question is did you get out of bed the wrong side today?? lol

You are obviously having many succesful meets so why the issue?? Fresh pair of eyes maybe!

Lp xx"

A mere question....irrelevant of our 'success' on here!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its just your responses appear to show you are peeved to say in the least!!

Hugs

Lp x

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay


"Hmmmmmm

this is an interesting one. I kind of think its up to an individual what they chose to say or show on their profile pages.

However, i have just had a quick peep at your profile and saw that you have may verifications. . . so the question is did you get out of bed the wrong side today?? lol

You are obviously having many succesful meets so why the issue?? Fresh pair of eyes maybe!

Lp xx

A mere question....irrelevant of our 'success' on here! "

But some might not see such a scoreboard as 'success'....and may read other things into it.

People are funny like that....they make all sorts of assumptions about others.

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By *lackCherryCouple
over a year ago

Bristol


"Its just your responses appear to show you are peeved to say in the least!!

Hugs

Lp x"

they seem quite reasonable and friendly to me even in response to the typical quite hate filled "we can do what we want so shut up" style posts you get anytime anyone asks a question on here :P

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Hmmmmmm

this is an interesting one. I kind of think its up to an individual what they chose to say or show on their profile pages.

However, i have just had a quick peep at your profile and saw that you have may verifications. . . so the question is did you get out of bed the wrong side today?? lol

You are obviously having many succesful meets so why the issue?? Fresh pair of eyes maybe!

Lp xx

A mere question....irrelevant of our 'success' on here!

But some might not see such a scoreboard as 'success'....and may read other things into it.

People are funny like that....they make all sorts of assumptions about others."

We don't show our veris as some kind of trophy of our success, nor judge others on quantity of verifications... We like them as it shows those who actually meet and don't just talk the talk so to speak!

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Its like the flaming gastapo are on here sometimes. Im sure being so suspicious of people and thinking that everyone has alterior motives for things cant be good for people.

This isnt directed at anyone person

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay


"Its just your responses appear to show you are peeved to say in the least!!

Hugs

Lp x

they seem quite reasonable and friendly to me even in response to the typical quite hate filled "we can do what we want so shut up" style posts you get anytime anyone asks a question on here :P"

'Hate filled'?......

Paranoia creeping in here methinks.

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By *lackCherryCouple
over a year ago

Bristol


"Its just your responses appear to show you are peeved to say in the least!!

Hugs

Lp x

they seem quite reasonable and friendly to me even in response to the typical quite hate filled "we can do what we want so shut up" style posts you get anytime anyone asks a question on here :P

'Hate filled'?......

Paranoia creeping in here methinks."

There is a very angry portion of this forum whos general response to any time any question is asked is always shut up we can do what we want, without really explaining the motivation for the action (which is often whats being asked).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Its like the flaming gastapo are on here sometimes. Im sure being so suspicious of people and thinking that everyone has alterior motives for things cant be good for people.

This isnt directed at anyone person"

no one expects the spanish inquisition!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Its just your responses appear to show you are peeved to say in the least!!

Hugs

Lp x

they seem quite reasonable and friendly to me even in response to the typical quite hate filled "we can do what we want so shut up" style posts you get anytime anyone asks a question on here :P

'Hate filled'?......

Paranoia creeping in here methinks.

There is a very angry portion of this forum whos general response to any time any question is asked is always shut up we can do what we want, without really explaining the motivation for the action (which is often whats being asked).

"

Really, we hadn't noticed.....

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire


"Its just your responses appear to show you are peeved to say in the least!!

Hugs

Lp x

they seem quite reasonable and friendly to me even in response to the typical quite hate filled "we can do what we want so shut up" style posts you get anytime anyone asks a question on here :P

'Hate filled'?......

Paranoia creeping in here methinks.

There is a very angry portion of this forum whos general response to any time any question is asked is always shut up we can do what we want, without really explaining the motivation for the action (which is often whats being asked).

"

Think you and me must be reading different threads

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hmmmm

Well I was trying to play nice, i show mine!!lol

I just really believe in freedom of choice. Like you said earlier, you dont have to meet anyone you dont want too. I know I wouldnt, we all have things that we dont like or make us think twice but that is our instinct and that can only be a good thing.There are so many people on here, lovely people, one or two that dont tick all the boxes are not a loss or cause for concern surely!

I wasnt suggesting the number of veries is a trophy, just that you obviously dont seem to have a problem meeting peeps.

Lp x

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay


"Its just your responses appear to show you are peeved to say in the least!!

Hugs

Lp x

they seem quite reasonable and friendly to me even in response to the typical quite hate filled "we can do what we want so shut up" style posts you get anytime anyone asks a question on here :P

'Hate filled'?......

Paranoia creeping in here methinks.

There is a very angry portion of this forum whos general response to any time any question is asked is always shut up we can do what we want, without really explaining the motivation for the action (which is often whats being asked).

"

I see not one 'hate filled' response to the Op's question...but then again I don't have an 'everyones out to get me' mentality...

Just as the Op had every right to post on the subject, other members have every right to give their own opinion.

You are reading too much into things...

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Its like the flaming gastapo are on here sometimes. Im sure being so suspicious of people and thinking that everyone has alterior motives for things cant be good for people.

This isnt directed at anyone person

no one expects the spanish inquisition!

"

And here we were thinking forums were for posting topics to discuss...!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have spoken to couples single men and women who had there verifications on show and they still turned out to be fake. They are just there to give people an idea of what you are like but not necessary. Best way to decide if you want to meet someone is phone calls and verify on cam!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Hmmmm

Well I was trying to play nice, i show mine!!lol

I just really believe in freedom of choice. Like you said earlier, you dont have to meet anyone you dont want too. I know I wouldnt, we all have things that we dont like or make us think twice but that is our instinct and that can only be a good thing.There are so many people on here, lovely people, one or two that dont tick all the boxes are not a loss or cause for concern surely!

I wasnt suggesting the number of veries is a trophy, just that you obviously dont seem to have a problem meeting peeps.

Lp x"

Only those who display their verifications anyway.... Lol

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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest

I only show mine when Im feeling insecure and want to reassure myself about what a good shag I am

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire


"Its just your responses appear to show you are peeved to say in the least!!

Hugs

Lp x

they seem quite reasonable and friendly to me even in response to the typical quite hate filled "we can do what we want so shut up" style posts you get anytime anyone asks a question on here :P

'Hate filled'?......

Paranoia creeping in here methinks.

There is a very angry portion of this forum whos general response to any time any question is asked is always shut up we can do what we want, without really explaining the motivation for the action (which is often whats being asked).

I see not one 'hate filled' response to the Op's question...but then again I don't have an 'everyones out to get me' mentality...

Just as the Op had every right to post on the subject, other members have every right to give their own opinion.

You are reading too much into things..."

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By *lackCherryCouple
over a year ago

Bristol


"

Think you and me must be reading different threads"

I don't spend a lot of time on these forums, but when I do check in them I will see at least one or two "shut up I can do what I want" style posts they might no be saying that directly but its the general theme of the response.

Its a pretty good reasonable question here, why do people hide verifications ? I think they are a useful took for seeing who someone has met and how the meets got on

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay


"Its like the flaming gastapo are on here sometimes. Im sure being so suspicious of people and thinking that everyone has alterior motives for things cant be good for people.

This isnt directed at anyone person

no one expects the spanish inquisition!

And here we were thinking forums were for posting topics to discuss...! "

Or....discussion that involves EVERYONE agreeing with you?

Different thing altogether.

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By *lackCherryCouple
over a year ago

Bristol


"We have spoken to couples single men and women who had there verifications on show and they still turned out to be fake. They are just there to give people an idea of what you are like but not necessary. Best way to decide if you want to meet someone is phone calls and verify on cam! "

Agreed with this one the best one seems to be the "phone" verification ones nearly always turn out to be fake (for obvious reasons).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Its just your responses appear to show you are peeved to say in the least!!

Hugs

Lp x

they seem quite reasonable and friendly to me even in response to the typical quite hate filled "we can do what we want so shut up" style posts you get anytime anyone asks a question on here :P

'Hate filled'?......

Paranoia creeping in here methinks."

Just because your paranoid doesnt mean to say there not out to get ya.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its my choice to do so.

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By *lackCherryCouple
over a year ago

Bristol


"

Or....discussion that involves EVERYONE agreeing with you?

Different thing altogether."

A discussion normally more than your first response to the op on this thread is somewhat the point.

"I do it because I want to" is hardly a discussion about it and the motivations behind it is it ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Its just your responses appear to show you are peeved to say in the least!!

Hugs

Lp x

they seem quite reasonable and friendly to me even in response to the typical quite hate filled "we can do what we want so shut up" style posts you get anytime anyone asks a question on here :P

'Hate filled'?......

Paranoia creeping in here methinks.

Just because your paranoid doesnt mean to say there not out to get ya. "

I've already been got...

Wolf

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Its like the flaming gastapo are on here sometimes. Im sure being so suspicious of people and thinking that everyone has alterior motives for things cant be good for people.

This isnt directed at anyone person

no one expects the spanish inquisition!

And here we were thinking forums were for posting topics to discuss...!

Or....discussion that involves EVERYONE agreeing with you?

Different thing altogether."

At what point did we ask for agreement?? We asked why - surely the 'because we can attitude' is far less helpful or thoughtful - we know that already..

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Its my choice to do so."

Fantastic, very helpful - never knew that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

lol, this is now making me giggle

perhaps we need some 'fabs' branding irons for members. If you meet all the criteria you get 'gennuine' stamped on one arse cheek and 'verified' on the lol

Sorry, its cold and I havent had me tea yet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I won't meet someone that hides the verifications as they could have all phone or web cam meets I like to know someone is really meeting.

Got asked in chat today if I was proud of having had so many meets. I said sadly not all meets have left verifications. Lol

Cali

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester


"If you say so.

The thing is... why do you care?

You've already said you don't want to meet people who hide them... so what's the big deal?

It's not that we care, we just wondered - its a question... Isn't that what forums are for??

It looks more like you were wondering if anyone else would agree with you rather than genuinely wondering why people make the choice not to display their verifications.... but may be that's just the phrasing you used.

Apologies for the phrasing, it was a genuine question rather than us looking for agreement on our thoughts.."

Cool... in which case here is my longer answer...

In my opinions verifications aren’t worth the pixels on the page. How have I come to this opinion….

The only timewasters I have encountered on this site in the last 4 years (OMG is it 4 years ) have all been verified by several people, including me.

I came to realise a profile could have been verified 20 times, all lovely verifications, saying how nice they were… it still doesn’t mean they haven’t pissed about another 200 other people.

Many verifications are just as much about promoting the author than the recipient….. so people will lie, beef it up, exaggerate and oversell…. “he’s really good with his fingers”… yeah if you want your nose picking.

In addition, I don’t feel I have anything to prove to anyone, at least nothing which requires me to show my verifications.

Then there are nutters on sites like this who:

a) can’t take knockbacks

b) get possessive

c) are just spiteful

d) get jealous because you have met someone they like

e) get the hump over forum posts

f) see swinging as a form of rivalry or contest

g) are just bonkers and fuck knows what they’ll do and why.

I’d like to protect my buddies and friends from such fruitloops.

And there’s the gossip brigade… Ooowww look who’s seeing who, Ooowww look at were they went…. Ooowww wait ‘til FannyFart see’s he’s been with her.

So all in all I would sooner trust my own judgement than the words of someone else... and prefer to meet people who can do the same.

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By *atalie..Woman
over a year ago

Bolton

verifications, do they really matter half of them say nice tings in them to get a nice one back

Would rather make my own mind up about a person on here than go off what other peeps say, and what they think of them may be so not what i would think of them, so it doesnt really matter if they hide them show them...altho i do get put off by peoples profiles with a shit load of veris why this is i dont have a clue just makes me go ewwww

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By *unandgames22Couple
over a year ago

dundee

we have chosen to try and have a mixture of our verifications up. we have a one very good one that we can display as the gentleman has used our real names in it but hey that life

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"verifications, do they really matter half of them say nice tings in them to get a nice one back

Would rather make my own mind up about a person on here than go off what other peeps say, and what they think of them may be so not what i would think of them, so it doesnt really matter if they hide them show them...altho i do get put off by peoples profiles with a shit load of veris why this is i dont have a clue just makes me go ewwww "

Having a lot of veris doesn't necessarily mean your shagging different people every night of the week.... A lot of ours come from parties / clubs etc - we use them to show we actually meet which unfortunately not everybody on here does......

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay


"verifications, do they really matter half of them say nice tings in them to get a nice one back

Would rather make my own mind up about a person on here than go off what other peeps say, and what they think of them may be so not what i would think of them, so it doesnt really matter if they hide them show them...altho i do get put off by peoples profiles with a shit load of veris why this is i dont have a clue just makes me go ewwww

Having a lot of veris doesn't necessarily mean your shagging different people every night of the week.... A lot of ours come from parties / clubs etc - we use them to show we actually meet which unfortunately not everybody on here does...... "

Then....now wait for it, might be a little bit left field, a bit on the edge....Just ignore those profiles that don't interest you?

I like to be quirky with my ideas.

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester


"Its just your responses appear to show you are peeved to say in the least!!

Hugs

Lp x

they seem quite reasonable and friendly to me even in response to the typical quite hate filled "we can do what we want so shut up" style posts you get anytime anyone asks a question on here :P

'Hate filled'?......

Paranoia creeping in here methinks.

There is a very angry portion of this forum whos general response to any time any question is asked is always shut up we can do what we want, without really explaining the motivation for the action (which is often whats being asked).

"

May be the what have you got to hide approach and the assumption of because they haven't got any didn't help.

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay


"Its just your responses appear to show you are peeved to say in the least!!

Hugs

Lp x

they seem quite reasonable and friendly to me even in response to the typical quite hate filled "we can do what we want so shut up" style posts you get anytime anyone asks a question on here :P

'Hate filled'?......

Paranoia creeping in here methinks.

There is a very angry portion of this forum whos general response to any time any question is asked is always shut up we can do what we want, without really explaining the motivation for the action (which is often whats being asked).

May be the what have you got to hide approach and the assumption of because they haven't got any didn't help.

"

Polo...I do hope that wasn't meant to be a 'hate filled' response?

I would be dissapointed if that was your intention.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"verifications, do they really matter half of them say nice tings in them to get a nice one back

Would rather make my own mind up about a person on here than go off what other peeps say, and what they think of them may be so not what i would think of them, so it doesnt really matter if they hide them show them...altho i do get put off by peoples profiles with a shit load of veris why this is i dont have a clue just makes me go ewwww

Having a lot of veris doesn't necessarily mean your shagging different people every night of the week.... A lot of ours come from parties / clubs etc - we use them to show we actually meet which unfortunately not everybody on here does......

Then....now wait for it, might be a little bit left field, a bit on the edge....Just ignore those profiles that don't interest you?

I like to be quirky with my ideas."

We do, again this was merely a question we were intrigued about... Wish we'd never started this thread now!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"verifications, do they really matter half of them say nice tings in them to get a nice one back

Would rather make my own mind up about a person on here than go off what other peeps say, and what they think of them may be so not what i would think of them, so it doesnt really matter if they hide them show them...altho i do get put off by peoples profiles with a shit load of veris why this is i dont have a clue just makes me go ewwww

Having a lot of veris doesn't necessarily mean your shagging different people every night of the week.... A lot of ours come from parties / clubs etc - we use them to show we actually meet which unfortunately not everybody on here does...... "

Wish i was shagging different people every night.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"verifications, do they really matter half of them say nice tings in them to get a nice one back

Would rather make my own mind up about a person on here than go off what other peeps say, and what they think of them may be so not what i would think of them, so it doesnt really matter if they hide them show them...altho i do get put off by peoples profiles with a shit load of veris why this is i dont have a clue just makes me go ewwww

Having a lot of veris doesn't necessarily mean your shagging different people every night of the week.... A lot of ours come from parties / clubs etc - we use them to show we actually meet which unfortunately not everybody on here does......

Wish i was shagging different people every night. "

Well yes, same here!

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester


"

Polo...I do hope that wasn't meant to be a 'hate filled' response?

I would be dissapointed if that was your intention.

"

I would hope it comes across as intended; a rational comment from a different _iewpoint.

However, I cannot be responsible for the shade of glasses people wear.

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By *heekyladyCouple
over a year ago

manchester

I display some and hide some. The hidden ones are only because they mention my name in them.

As for meeting people who don't display, I think for me personally, I prefer to see at least one verification from an actual meet to show that the person in question has had a successful meet (especially from a safety point of _iew also)

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By *ustyWoman
over a year ago

inverclyde

some guys get a kick out of reading a verification and i once had a guy ask me questions about one of mine ... he wanted to know if the guy was big enough, was he worth it, good in bed, did he satisfy my needs........ i feel its nobody elses business except the parties involved... hence i have mine hidden but will show if a requested

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

'May be the what have you got to hide approach and the assumption of because they haven't got any didn't help.'

Have to say Polo has given all the reasons I can come up with for people not wanting to show veris. Stalkers, and possessive weirdos being top of my list!

And I also echo her statement above!! It got my back up too!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I display some and hide some. The hidden ones are only because they mention my name in them.

As for meeting people who don't display, I think for me personally, I prefer to see at least one verification from an actual meet to show that the person in question has had a successful meet (especially from a safety point of _iew also)"

Yes i thinks so to, unless its a newbie.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Its like the flaming gastapo are on here sometimes. Im sure being so suspicious of people and thinking that everyone has alterior motives for things cant be good for people.

This isnt directed at anyone person"
sure is , Everyones diffrent i know a person he meet loads of couples but only show fems who have not meet alot of people .. why because he can , lol makes him look sweet and not been up to alot he say , lol

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn

Everyone has differnet preferences, and are looking for different things.

As for veri's we show only social ones, for one reason only to prove we are a couple. I wont and never will show play veri's nor will I ever leave a play verification. Why because as far as we are concerned it is no ones buisness, only the people involved.

To be honest I dont like to know if someone else was a great shag, great with their mouth fingers ect... just because they where good with that person doesnt automatically say they are going to be good with us.

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn


"If you say so.

The thing is... why do you care?

You've already said you don't want to meet people who hide them... so what's the big deal?

It's not that we care, we just wondered - its a question... Isn't that what forums are for??

It looks more like you were wondering if anyone else would agree with you rather than genuinely wondering why people make the choice not to display their verifications.... but may be that's just the phrasing you used.

Apologies for the phrasing, it was a genuine question rather than us looking for agreement on our thoughts..

Cool... in which case here is my longer answer...

In my opinions verifications aren’t worth the pixels on the page. How have I come to this opinion….

The only timewasters I have encountered on this site in the last 4 years (OMG is it 4 years ) have all been verified by several people, including me.

I came to realise a profile could have been verified 20 times, all lovely verifications, saying how nice they were… it still doesn’t mean they haven’t pissed about another 200 other people.

Many verifications are just as much about promoting the author than the recipient….. so people will lie, beef it up, exaggerate and oversell…. “he’s really good with his fingers”… yeah if you want your nose picking.

In addition, I don’t feel I have anything to prove to anyone, at least nothing which requires me to show my verifications.

Then there are nutters on sites like this who:

a) can’t take knockbacks

b) get possessive

c) are just spiteful

d) get jealous because you have met someone they like

e) get the hump over forum posts

f) see swinging as a form of rivalry or contest

g) are just bonkers and fuck knows what they’ll do and why.

I’d like to protect my buddies and friends from such fruitloops.

And there’s the gossip brigade… Ooowww look who’s seeing who, Ooowww look at were they went…. Ooowww wait ‘til FannyFart see’s he’s been with her.

So all in all I would sooner trust my own judgement than the words of someone else... and prefer to meet people who can do the same.

"

+1 now if I had read the whole thread I wouldn't of had to reply, as this is the perfect answer in my opinion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i once asked a guy why he had his verifications hidden to be told 'i'm ashamed of them i was desperate so shagged anyone that replied' - a guy to avoid and now suspicious if veris hidden

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham


"

Think you and me must be reading different threads

I don't spend a lot of time on these forums, but when I do check in them I will see at least one or two "shut up I can do what I want" style posts they might no be saying that directly but its the general theme of the response.

Its a pretty good reasonable question here, why do people hide verifications ? I think they are a useful took for seeing who someone has met and how the meets got on"

and ppl answered that question, however the Op questioned the honesty of those who show not to...because i can is a perfectly valid response to any question someone has about how others run their profile...it is really no one elses buisness.

As for the question, given the amount of slut shaming on here if i was a single woman there is no way i would share my veris.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

+1 Jemima on the slut shaming issue!!

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By *lackCherryCouple
over a year ago

Bristol


"+1 Jemima on the slut shaming issue!!"

you're going to have to tell me more about this slut shaming thing

unless the posts/threads get deleted very very quickly I haven't seen any of those so far its pretty out of order for a site like this for people to be engaging in such a practise.

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham


"+1 Jemima on the slut shaming issue!!

you're going to have to tell me more about this slut shaming thing

unless the posts/threads get deleted very very quickly I haven't seen any of those so far its pretty out of order for a site like this for people to be engaging in such a practise."
4

happens all the time...sometimes under the "we meet selectiivly unlike others" posts,

Then there are the "do women really meet without knowing names posts"

Then there are the out and out what kind of women come on swingers sites posts and threads...just this week there was a thread started saying a woman with 50 veris must have diseases festering in her.

Words like selective, choosy, are often thrown in, as if there were some form of hierarchy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think maybe sometimes there just jealous, i know i am when i see people with lots of verifications. I dont really care what people think about me, and how may people i have met as i have more important things to worry about.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get messages from people who say they are selective and choosy, they still want to meet me though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People profiles are thier own affair

I show all mine have done on any profile such as my old couples one

In a way things that annoy people about others profiles actually gives the person who makes the observation a hint that the profile may not be for them

After all if you dont agree with something on the profile or that the veris are hidden then maybe that profile aint fa them

Move on and dont lose sleep over others choices simples xx

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By *edriderCouple
over a year ago

glasgow

we dont hide our verifications we simply dont display them because who we meet is private to us and the other people involved, same as friends list, we dont see the need to show references of our play meets for people who are just browsing our profile, we meet at clubs and with people we meet from clubs, the op was looking for a reason and this is ours, but as others have said its personal choice and if i come across a profile and dont like something i just move on. x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Its just your responses appear to show you are peeved to say in the least!!

Hugs

Lp x

they seem quite reasonable and friendly to me even in response to the typical quite hate filled "we can do what we want so shut up" style posts you get anytime anyone asks a question on here :P

'Hate filled'?......

Paranoia creeping in here methinks.

There is a very angry portion of this forum whos general response to any time any question is asked is always shut up we can do what we want, without really explaining the motivation for the action (which is often whats being asked).

"

Surely your not suggesting there are cliques on the forums ?

Say it isn't so!

XXXX

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By *ortheastcoupleukCouple
over a year ago

easington were the sun dont shine

tbh if some one contacts us we look have a read .always speak on phone do the social bit then decide some times we have spur of the moment meets, ok it gives you a idea of the person/persons you gona meet , but few weeks ago we had a fella who had loads of vertys off cpls who said good things about him but he contacted us asking if we wanted to watch him fuck his jack russel so just shows vertys dont tell the whole story.

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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest


" but few weeks ago we had a fella who had loads of vertys off cpls who said good things about him but he contacted us asking if we wanted to watch him fuck his jack russel so just shows vertys dont tell the whole story."

sorry shouldnt laugh

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By *ortheastcoupleukCouple
over a year ago

easington were the sun dont shine


" but few weeks ago we had a fella who had loads of vertys off cpls who said good things about him but he contacted us asking if we wanted to watch him fuck his jack russel so just shows vertys dont tell the whole story.

sorry shouldnt laugh "
its ok we did to after we reported him....the member not the jack russel

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester


"....... asking if we wanted to watch him fuck his jack russel so just shows vertys dont tell the whole story."

LMFAO

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My choice not to show them from Day 1, as I consider them as private and for my enjoyment only.

Does not appear to have done me any harm.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A guy I have met hides his veris as there was one woman on here who he turned down that messaged every woman and couple on his list slagging him off and another women who had looked at the veris of women who had left him veris and was contacting all the guys on theirs for meets

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In all honesty we can understand what the O.P's gripe is.

Surely the site owners implemented Verifications as a means of helping members decide who they'd like to contact/meet.

That said, it seems a strange decision to then give the ability to remove them.

However, we too have chosen to remove ours for the simple reason that we rarely meet new ppl but do meet a close circle of friends once in a while.

Therefore it would be silly ping ponging verifications from the same small group.

We also may meet ppl not on the site, who obviously can't leave a verification.

We do and have found verifications useful in the past, such as when you see that someone you were interested in meeting has had regular meets with one or more couples who "only do bareback".

In those type of instances it can be very useful.

XXXX

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

I think the replies of " because people can" is not the same as " shut up" as has been suggested.

I also think it depends on how the question is asked and how bad the accusations are as to what answers you are going to get.

Some people know they don't have to justify themselves to anyone and don't expect others to justify what they do to them.

All in all, use the site how you want to, but don't expect everyone to use it the same way.

For anyone who doesn't know and doesn't like veri's hidden as you can't see if people meet or not..if you use the advanced search you can search for people who have meet verifications.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Verifications are very one sided and subjective IMHO, as I have yet to find anyone who would display a verification that is not in his/her/their favour!

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

well until the day i see a bad verification i will treat the whole malarky with the pinch of salt it deserves.....

i don't see why "some" people hold such stock in it... the hold such a rosy _iew of what is in effect a flawed process.......

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"well until the day i see a bad verification i will treat the whole malarky with the pinch of salt it deserves.....

i don't see why "some" people hold such stock in it... the hold such a rosy _iew of what is in effect a flawed process......."

But they can help prove a couple of things...

A. People are genuine &

B. that they actually meet cos unfortunately there's a fair few people out there that are just all talk!!

Of course people are only gonna display good veris but even so don't these still show something - and better than none or all hidden!!

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum


"well until the day i see a bad verification i will treat the whole malarky with the pinch of salt it deserves....."

Wouldn't it be great if someone was honest enough to show it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"well until the day i see a bad verification i will treat the whole malarky with the pinch of salt it deserves.....

i don't see why "some" people hold such stock in it... the hold such a rosy _iew of what is in effect a flawed process.......

But they can help prove a couple of things...

A. People are genuine &

B. that they actually meet cos unfortunately there's a fair few people out there that are just all talk!!

Of course people are only gonna display good veris but even so don't these still show something - and better than none or all hidden!! "

+1

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"well until the day i see a bad verification i will treat the whole malarky with the pinch of salt it deserves.....

Wouldn't it be great if someone was honest enough to show it. "

No one has ever left me a bad verification, and i have never left them one, if i dont like someome then dont leave them one.

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn

that they actually meet cos unfortunately there's a fair few people out there that are just all talk!!

Is this meet to play or meet for social? as this is 2 different things.

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By *atalie..Woman
over a year ago

Bolton


"Verifications are very one sided and subjective IMHO, as I have yet to find anyone who would display a verification that is not in his/her/their favour!

"

Just like i said before they only give good glowing veris to get good glowing ones back sad really

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester


"Verifications are very one sided and subjective IMHO, as I have yet to find anyone who would display a verification that is not in his/her/their favour!

Just like i said before they only give good glowing veris to get good glowing ones back sad really "

Indeed... it's one thing to see a bad verification on someone's profile, but how many would think twice about meeting the person/people who wrote a damning one.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"well until the day i see a bad verification i will treat the whole malarky with the pinch of salt it deserves.....

Wouldn't it be great if someone was honest enough to show it.

No one has ever left me a bad verification, and i have never left them one, if i dont like someome then dont leave them one."

+1

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"that they actually meet cos unfortunately there's a fair few people out there that are just all talk!!

Is this meet to play or meet for social? as this is 2 different things.

"

Both... !!!!!!

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead


"well until the day i see a bad verification i will treat the whole malarky with the pinch of salt it deserves.....

i don't see why "some" people hold such stock in it... the hold such a rosy _iew of what is in effect a flawed process.......

But they can help prove a couple of things...

A. People are genuine &

B. that they actually meet cos unfortunately there's a fair few people out there that are just all talk!!

Of course people are only gonna display good veris but even so don't these still show something - and better than none or all hidden!! "

okay... so would YOU show a bad verification... i'll write one up now if the answer is yes....

see the thing about verifications is things.... in how many other walks of life would you trust what a stranger thought of another stranger implicitly????

not many......

i only show ones that are not rude... because it is no ones business who i meet and what i get up to if anything.... and it took me a long time to get to that point....

for every action there is a consequence... so the consequence of people not showing verifications is that they may miss out on meets....

as long as they are happy with that, then i don't see what the issue is.....

i wouldnt be persuaded into showing them just because i felt badgered into by others......

let me give you another example....

I have never measured my bits... but i have people try to badger me into doing it.....

has it cost me meets.... sure

do i feel comfortable with the decision i made.... absolutely!

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn

[Removed by poster at 27/01/12 22:23:12]

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn


"that they actually meet cos unfortunately there's a fair few people out there that are just all talk!!

Is this meet to play or meet for social? as this is 2 different things.

Both... !!!!!!"

Well as I said in earlier post, I will not and never will show or give a play meet veri, to me its about discretion, plus the fact if they are good shag ect to one person does not automatically mean they will be compatible with others!!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"well until the day i see a bad verification i will treat the whole malarky with the pinch of salt it deserves.....

i don't see why "some" people hold such stock in it... the hold such a rosy _iew of what is in effect a flawed process.......

But they can help prove a couple of things...

A. People are genuine &

B. that they actually meet cos unfortunately there's a fair few people out there that are just all talk!!

Of course people are only gonna display good veris but even so don't these still show something - and better than none or all hidden!!

okay... so would YOU show a bad verification... i'll write one up now if the answer is yes....

"

Yes, if it was from somebody we had actually met and was factual - we don't have anything to hide!

Your offer to write us a 'bad' verification just to prove something is kinda missing the point....

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead


"well until the day i see a bad verification i will treat the whole malarky with the pinch of salt it deserves.....

i don't see why "some" people hold such stock in it... the hold such a rosy _iew of what is in effect a flawed process.......

But they can help prove a couple of things...

A. People are genuine &

B. that they actually meet cos unfortunately there's a fair few people out there that are just all talk!!

Of course people are only gonna display good veris but even so don't these still show something - and better than none or all hidden!!

okay... so would YOU show a bad verification... i'll write one up now if the answer is yes....

Yes, if it was from somebody we had actually met and was factual - we don't have anything to hide!

Your offer to write us a 'bad' verification just to prove something is kinda missing the point...."

no... the point i was making is why on earth would you trust the point of _iew of a stranger talking about another stranger implictly......

if that is what you are saying... let me do it and please show it... and then see if the "strangers" that know me trust my opinion.....

so if you are only going to show the good ones.... it will only give you a skewed look at people......

so answer be this question....

if verification is the "be all".... which one of these people would you most likely meet...

a) couple "a" who hide all theirs, but value privacy... but are lovely people... have had lets say 20 meets and never let anyone down....

b) couple "b" who show lets say 5 veri's... but quite frankly they are a pain in the arse and not nice people... they have let down and no showed 15 people

the problem with verification is that people like to use it as if it a crutch for them to lean on...... that it is somehow replacing your own due diligence and some god damn common sense in your own choosing process....

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

_abio, you forgot couple 'c'....

Have 10 verifications, but each and every person they met has since blocked them for being weirdo stalkers, four couples having to change mobile numbers and one couple pursuing a restraining order.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"well until the day i see a bad verification i will treat the whole malarky with the pinch of salt it deserves.....

i don't see why "some" people hold such stock in it... the hold such a rosy _iew of what is in effect a flawed process.......

But they can help prove a couple of things...

A. People are genuine &

B. that they actually meet cos unfortunately there's a fair few people out there that are just all talk!!

Of course people are only gonna display good veris but even so don't these still show something - and better than none or all hidden!!

okay... so would YOU show a bad verification... i'll write one up now if the answer is yes....

Yes, if it was from somebody we had actually met and was factual - we don't have anything to hide!

Your offer to write us a 'bad' verification just to prove something is kinda missing the point....

no... the point i was making is why on earth would you trust the point of _iew of a stranger talking about another stranger implictly......

if that is what you are saying... let me do it and please show it... and then see if the "strangers" that know me trust my opinion.....

so if you are only going to show the good ones.... it will only give you a skewed look at people......

so answer be this question....

if verification is the "be all".... which one of these people would you most likely meet...

a) couple "a" who hide all theirs, but value privacy... but are lovely people... have had lets say 20 meets and never let anyone down....

b) couple "b" who show lets say 5 veri's... but quite frankly they are a pain in the arse and not nice people... they have let down and no showed 15 people

the problem with verification is that people like to use it as if it a crutch for them to lean on...... that it is somehow replacing your own due diligence and some god damn common sense in your own choosing process...."

In our experience it doesn't tend to be the couples who hide all there veris.... More the 'singles' with probably 1 dodgy phone / cam meet veri from an equally fake fellow piccy hunter or bloke pretending to be a woman!!

Granted we realise there will be exceptions to this and we apologise for the genuine peeps out there which may have a 'valid' reason for hiding theirs...

This thread was never intended to upset / accuse or cause major fall outs - we merely asked what the possible reasons for wanting to hide a genuine veri may be!

I think we get the picture now.... Don't you just wish sometimes you never asked in the first place...!!!!!'

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"_abio, you forgot couple 'c'....

Have 10 verifications, but each and every person they met has since blocked them for being weirdo stalkers, four couples having to change mobile numbers and one couple pursuing a restraining order."

Why verify them in the first place then block

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just because someone is showing verifications does not necessarily mean they are genuine IMHO.

They are one-sided and subjective, often written by someone the reader does not know.

IF, however, a verification is written by someone that I personally know well enough to trust his/her judgement, then I would consider it as being truthful.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Why verify them in the first place then block "

ive blocked a few people i have met and verified, i met them because they seemed nice, verified them because we got on and had a good night and blocked them because they have got to pushy and didnt want them mailing me any more

I dont do it to remove my verification thats just someting that happens i have no control over, does not make them any less genuine just when someone pesters me or get pushy i block them

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester


"

I think we get the picture now.... Don't you just wish sometimes you never asked in the first place...!!!!!'"

I'm glad you did.

OK, some of the phrasing and assumption bit wasn't the best start, but I thought that one had been put to bed.

If you now have a wider understanding of why some choose to keep their verifications private, then it's a good thing.

Learning something or seeing a different _iewpoint is never a bad thing.

People won't always agree or see things the same way, but as long as it doesn't get personal, so what, that's life.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Just because someone is showing verifications does not necessarily mean they are genuine IMHO.

They are one-sided and subjective, often written by someone the reader does not know.

IF, however, a verification is written by someone that I personally know well enough to trust his/her judgement, then I would consider it as being truthful.

"

Course it doesnt, but if you then look at that persons profile and their verifications it gives a pretty good clue they are genuine..... Far more than if you don't have anything to look at / check!!

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester


"_abio, you forgot couple 'c'....

Have 10 verifications, but each and every person they met has since blocked them for being weirdo stalkers, four couples having to change mobile numbers and one couple pursuing a restraining order.

Why verify them in the first place then block "

Sometimes you don't really get to see the real person until a while after the meet... it's when the messages change to things like... "oh how come you met another couple at the weekend when you told us you weren't free" ... and worse.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"_abio, you forgot couple 'c'....

Have 10 verifications, but each and every person they met has since blocked them for being weirdo stalkers, four couples having to change mobile numbers and one couple pursuing a restraining order.

Why verify them in the first place then block

Sometimes you don't really get to see the real person until a while after the meet... it's when the messages change to things like... "oh how come you met another couple at the weekend when you told us you weren't free" ... and worse."

Maybe this world is very different from a couples point of _iew..... We have never had anything like that in 4 yrs on the scene.... As a single woman maybe peeps can get more 'attached' ...

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

I am glad the Op started the thread, like Polo said a good discussion often with Two differing _iews on a subject makes for great debate.

And it is refreshing to see that the Op finally came to the conclusion that there may be perfectly good reasons for individual members to choose not to show verifications....good on them for being honest about it.

I am also glad that the 'diversion' that was attempted by someone to make it look like an 'us and them' situation never worked out, some people will always try to make something out of things that just aren't there....and good on the Op for not getting involved in that.

All in all a great discussion.

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay


"_abio, you forgot couple 'c'....

Have 10 verifications, but each and every person they met has since blocked them for being weirdo stalkers, four couples having to change mobile numbers and one couple pursuing a restraining order.

Why verify them in the first place then block

Sometimes you don't really get to see the real person until a while after the meet... it's when the messages change to things like... "oh how come you met another couple at the weekend when you told us you weren't free" ... and worse."

I've had that myself, both times from couples who got ratty with me for seeing 'certain people' from this site.

And one of them after Four very good meets with them.....just goes to show that people can often show their true colours quite a while after meeting them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"_abio, you forgot couple 'c'....

Have 10 verifications, but each and every person they met has since blocked them for being weirdo stalkers, four couples having to change mobile numbers and one couple pursuing a restraining order.

Why verify them in the first place then block

Sometimes you don't really get to see the real person until a while after the meet... it's when the messages change to things like... "oh how come you met another couple at the weekend when you told us you weren't free" ... and worse.

I've had that myself, both times from couples who got ratty with me for seeing 'certain people' from this site.

And one of them after Four very good meets with them.....just goes to show that people can often show their true colours quite a while after meeting them."

i would imagine it happens a lot

Ive had it a few times, that and guys who want me to be their swinging partner and pester me to meet couples with them

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I think the main thing for us is that if everybody on here was 100% genuine then it wouldn't be an issue.....but unfortunately it's the amount of fakes which kinda lead us (and it appears others) to get these doubts... And let's be honest I bet there isn't anyone here who hasn't been 'hit up' or attempted to be mis led by some of these sad individuals.....

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester


"_abio, you forgot couple 'c'....

Have 10 verifications, but each and every person they met has since blocked them for being weirdo stalkers, four couples having to change mobile numbers and one couple pursuing a restraining order.

Why verify them in the first place then block

Sometimes you don't really get to see the real person until a while after the meet... it's when the messages change to things like... "oh how come you met another couple at the weekend when you told us you weren't free" ... and worse.

Maybe this world is very different from a couples point of _iew..... We have never had anything like that in 4 yrs on the scene.... As a single woman maybe peeps can get more 'attached' ..."

Honestly I am not trying to play top trumps here but I've been around the scene for a good 10 years and couples do still get stalkers, weirdos and cling-on possessive types.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo


" and couples do still get stalkers, weirdos and cling-on possessive types.

"

I can confirm this can happen to couples

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Just because someone is showing verifications does not necessarily mean they are genuine IMHO.

They are one-sided and subjective, often written by someone the reader does not know.

IF, however, a verification is written by someone that I personally know well enough to trust his/her judgement, then I would consider it as being truthful.

Course it doesnt, but if you then look at that persons profile and their verifications it gives a pretty good clue they are genuine..... Far more than if you don't have anything to look at / check!!"

.

I would rather read what is written in the profile than to look at the verifications left for that person/couple.

A one-liner profile with many verifications would not entice me to meet the person, as it implies the person to be lacking in imagination, lazy, and not self-reliant, etc. etc...

Each to their own at the end of the day.

How one goes about determining whether he/she would meet someone may or may not work for me. Likewise, my own approach may not work for other people.

However, my approach works for me, and I shall stick with it.

What others do and don't do is their business, and I would not be so bold to preach what is right and wrong, unless I have some form of internationally recognised guidelines, references and standards to back me up.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"_abio, you forgot couple 'c'....

Have 10 verifications, but each and every person they met has since blocked them for being weirdo stalkers, four couples having to change mobile numbers and one couple pursuing a restraining order.

Why verify them in the first place then block

Sometimes you don't really get to see the real person until a while after the meet... it's when the messages change to things like... "oh how come you met another couple at the weekend when you told us you weren't free" ... and worse.

Maybe this world is very different from a couples point of _iew..... We have never had anything like that in 4 yrs on the scene.... As a single woman maybe peeps can get more 'attached' ...

Honestly I am not trying to play top trumps here but I've been around the scene for a good 10 years and couples do still get stalkers, weirdos and cling-on possessive types.

"

I don't doubt that, was just saying as a single female it's probably more common...

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester


"

I don't doubt that, was just saying as a single female it's probably more common..."

Probably singles generally... some women get the old green eye infection.

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham


" and couples do still get stalkers, weirdos and cling-on possessive types.

I can confirm this can happen to couples "

yup...confirmation here too

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Funny really, I've never had a stalker type, and I show my veris. However verifications are a feature of the site that people can use if they wish. I like veris, but some people don't and thus will not show them on their profile. Their choice.

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

[Removed by poster at 27/01/12 23:30:46]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"that they actually meet cos unfortunately there's a fair few people out there that are just all talk!!

Is this meet to play or meet for social? as this is 2 different things.

Both... !!!!!!

Well as I said in earlier post, I will not and never will show or give a play meet veri, to me its about discretion, plus the fact if they are good shag ect to one person does not automatically mean they will be compatible with others!!!!"

And don't you just hate those single guys that send you a message with a couple of lines but end it with "look at my verifications!" I don't bother chatting with those as like you say, doesn't mean they are my taste

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Because I can."

+1

My profile, my rules!

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

I do love the use of the word 'why' on here.... sometimes comes with a flavour of genuine interest, other times with a dose of condemnation.

why?

oops......

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By *ovely CummingsWoman
over a year ago

Peaky Nipples


"If you say so.

Cool... in which case here is my longer answer...

In my opinions verifications aren’t worth the pixels on the page. How have I come to this opinion….

The only timewasters I have encountered on this site in the last 4 years (OMG is it 4 years ) have all been verified by several people, including me.

I came to realise a profile could have been verified 20 times, all lovely verifications, saying how nice they were… it still doesn’t mean they haven’t pissed about another 200 other people.

Many verifications are just as much about promoting the author than the recipient….. so people will lie, beef it up, exaggerate and oversell…. “he’s really good with his fingers”… yeah if you want your nose picking.

In addition, I don’t feel I have anything to prove to anyone, at least nothing which requires me to show my verifications.

Then there are nutters on sites like this who:

a) can’t take knockbacks

b) get possessive

c) are just spiteful

d) get jealous because you have met someone they like

e) get the hump over forum posts

f) see swinging as a form of rivalry or contest

g) are just bonkers and fuck knows what they’ll do and why.

I’d like to protect my buddies and friends from such fruitloops.

And there’s the gossip brigade… Ooowww look who’s seeing who, Ooowww look at were they went…. Ooowww wait ‘til FannyFart see’s he’s been with her.

So all in all I would sooner trust my own judgement than the words of someone else... and prefer to meet people who can do the same.

"

For me, verification's can show that someone or some others have had some kind of contact with that person, but it has no bearing on whether they will or won't meet you.

I don't show my verification's because i am very discreet and for me, this includes not discussing with others who I have or haven't played with. By showing my verification's, it feels like discretion has gone out the window.

Similarly I don't read others verification's that are on show.

If I were talking to someone in a club and they started to reel off the names of people they had played with, i'd walk away as it's not my idea of discretion. A list of verifications feels the same to me.

It comes down to personal choice in the end, hence why the site is set up to accommodate this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As I have a single profile that ok I dont use now I can now see two thoughts on hiding veris. As a single I always hid mine for 2 reasons

A What I did on a meet is down to me and the other person and what I did with 1 does not mean I would do it with another.

B it does save on the Oh Im not meeting you because you have met him and others asking what was so and so like.

Now as a cpl we show them although still wouldnt show any with too much detail of play in but have found it helps people to work out that yes we are defiantly a couple .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do hide some as had a person mail others making at thay new me. I think thay should find there own play mateS not just read my feed-backs to find locals.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hide mine because I don't want to broadcast who I've been meeting. I work in pretty much an all male environment and I know that some have seen me on here so I don't want it broadcasting around work who and when I've been meeting.

I've explained on my profile that I'm more than willing to make them vissible if it would make it easier for someone to choose.

No doubt I probably am narrowing my chances, the same could be said about me choosing to keep my face pics private, so be it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I hide mine because I don't want to broadcast who I've been meeting. I work in pretty much an all male environment and I know that some have seen me on here so I don't want it broadcasting around work who and when I've been meeting.

I've explained on my profile that I'm more than willing to make them vissible if it would make it easier for someone to choose.

No doubt I probably am narrowing my chances, the same could be said about me choosing to keep my face pics private, so be it. "

Thats a good reason not too show them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We're not naive enough to believe, or even read, what people have left others as verifications.

However, we do take into account the profiles of the people who leave them.

So if we're interested in someone who's profile intimates that they're the kind of people we'd like to meet but their previous meets profiles suggest otherwise,then that would affect our decision to meet.

Many people hide their verifications for reasons that are sometimes genuine, sometimes vague and other times just to be deceitful.

Either way its up to people to choose their meets in the manner they see fit based on the information they see before them.

XXXX

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

DISCRETION!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We hide ours, not because we have something to hide, but because we have nothing to prove!

We have a tick to show we are photo-verified and also the icon to show we have been verified by other users.

Why would you knowing WHO we have met for a drink or a chat or a night of pure debauchery make us any more genuine?

and how is it anyone elses buisness?

personally we dont think verifications count for anything,however for those that DO trust them then it should be enough that we have been verified, without you needing to know how, who, where and when.

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By *abe1200Couple
over a year ago

belfast


"Because its their business who they have or have not met. "
exactly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hide one it said i was a nice couple ? can only think Balls ?

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By *ark CharmerMan
over a year ago

Horsham

I have verifications, I choose to hide them at the moment:

Because I can - amongst other reasons.

I am very social and attend socials, parties, clubs so people can make their own minds up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel some go into too much detail to be shown publicly.

And lets be honest here.

No one is going to write you a bad verification as they know it will be rejected and one as bad sent back.

No one is going to put on show a bad verification are they?

So at the end of the day they're pointless as re_iews and merely just go to prove you've met someone.

As for not meeting people who hide their verifications all you would see is the comments other people think that person would want to see.. You learn more by seeing the verifications they've left rather than received.

If anyone refused to meet me cos I hide my verifications I would see it as their loss!

.xX Jo Xx.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We chose not to display ours because we don't want to be judged on who we have met before and have that affect If someone contacts us or not.

Would rather be judged my speaking to them on phone etc and go from there. If we have people chose not to contact us due to not displaying veris then so be it. It's a chance we take. Also agree that the whole system seems rather flawed as if you had a awful meet with someone and left a veri saying so they would hardly display it would they ? The same as when you go on a company or restaurants own website and see the section with customer feedback have you ever read anything bad ? no cause they censor all bad and display only good. The same as we can do on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I choose not to display my verifications because they're all bad. Just like how I choose to hide all my pictures, it's because I'm ugly.

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