FabSwingers.com forum: Real or Fantasy

By *ustforfunagain OP Couple
over a year ago

Stevenage

The build up when arranging a meet, the discussions about how it will go, what we both want, how far we want to push the boundaries (often during sex) is electric. The fantasy stage, our.minds on overdrive our bodies on edge.

Then comes the awkwardness, the meet, the stilted conversation and initial trepidation as you move towards the play aspect. The reality stage, don't get me wrong it is fun and exciting but never fully lives up to the fantasy....

Are we doing this wrong or expecting to much?

One couple we meet, came to visit on a Friday and ended up staying until Sunday, the friendship and trust built help push us close to fulfilling the fantasy so perhaps I am answering my own conundrum. It takes time and trust to reach the fantasy zone.

I amsure we are not the only couple to think this. Xx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its a weird thing to find ourselves doing isnt it. I think our minds always see things in more vivid detail than the cold light of day.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ustforfunagain OP Couple
over a year ago

Stevenage

I agree,the synergy within the fantasy against the clumsiness of reality.

more practice required me thinks

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ondonGent83Man
over a year ago

Stratford

I think you have just hit the nail on the head as to why so many single guys back out at the last minute (myself not included!! Ha ha)

That gut wrenching anxiety as you are getting ready for a meet is, for me, part of the fun. I believe anyone who doesn't get that feeling doesn't get the benefit of a really good meet. Social or play meet. Xx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dont know where you meet but hotel rooms are a bit bland to add to any sort of atmosphere aren't they. Unless it could be nightime with low lights and flickering shadows and mysterious strangers. Im normally in the stark light of daytime

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it's more important to have normal chat. Your more likely to be on the same wavelength. The minute the conversation is dominated by sex chat it's the beginning of the end

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not getting worked up about the fantasy and instead going with the attitude of whatever happens it will be fun, would maybe help, overthinking it all will just tie you up in knots x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro

That's one of the reasons I like to keep the conversation neutral now. I've yet to find anyone that matches my minds fantasies yet. Then let the social take its natural course wherever that maybe.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

I like to have meets with some kind of social element rather than straight into the sex part - either in a club where you can spend time in the social area first, or if it's a hotel meet, making time to do something socially first, chatting and flirting and providing a natural link into the sex.

I tend to find it works better that way, and doesn't feel quite so awkward when you move to the play area/hotel room and wonder how to make that first move.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The build up when arranging a meet, the discussions about how it will go, what we both want, how far we want to push the boundaries (often during sex) is electric. The fantasy stage, our.minds on overdrive our bodies on edge.

Are we doing this wrong or expecting to much?

I amsure we are not the only couple to think this. Xx"

That is such a good point!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iliciousCouple
over a year ago

Sussex/Surrey

"Not getting worked up about the fantasy and instead going with the attitude of whatever happens it will be fun, would maybe help, overthinking it all will just tie you up in knots x"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Reality has been better most of the time for me

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One of the reasons we always plan an initial meet at clubs where we know we can relax at...secondly we prefer to go with the Flo not discuss details make defined plans or such of what we would like..yeah will say what we are possibly open to, like and dislike etc boundaries but that's it...too much is dependent on the atmosphere and mood of the night..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe some fantasies should remain just that...

The reality is where we all live. And just sometimes reality can make our world so much a better place than fantasy ever will...

If only we find the right reality to fill our lives in a way fantasy can never match....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread