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"Fighting a losing battle I'm afraid. People will defend it as their 'preference' and its their right to choose. What can ya do? " Nothing need be done. It IS their preference and right to choose. Should people change their right to choose simply because it's a swinging site? A vegan can go into McDonald's for a coffee. But it doesn't mean they have to order a double cheeseburger just because of the environment. | |||
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"Fighting a losing battle I'm afraid. People will defend it as their 'preference' and its their right to choose. What can ya do? Nothing need be done. It IS their preference and right to choose. Should people change their right to choose simply because it's a swinging site? A vegan can go into McDonald's for a coffee. But it doesn't mean they have to order a double cheeseburger just because of the environment. " | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ " What do you think should be done? | |||
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" A vegan can go into McDonald's for a coffee. But it doesn't mean they have to order a double cheeseburger just because of the environment. " In am endless debate regarding this on Fab, this has to be the best answer yet. Brilliant. | |||
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" A vegan can go into McDonald's for a coffee. But it doesn't mean they have to order a double cheeseburger just because of the environment. In am endless debate regarding this on Fab, this has to be the best answer yet. Brilliant. " Why thank you | |||
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"...and yet the vast majority of black men that message me define themselves by the size of their cock and reference their colour or size in their profile name. They also attend parties entitled something like ‘donkey dick’ or ‘dark desires’. " Yes, the number of guys who message me saying I'm a BBC. Not even I HAVE a BBC. I guess people feel they have to use what they have to stand out but I'd prefer the integrity of someone who just says I'm a man, fancy a meet rather than giving into the temptation. | |||
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"Surely as a site all about sex. It’s about meeting people you find attractive. Everyone has certain traits they like. Personally I don’t like fat gingers, but should I sleep with them so I don’t upset them? " Of course ha ha | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ " These types of posts DO attract attention to the OP, but as above never many positive ones. Choosing who you want or do not want to play with or meet is not racial stereotyping, just people using their freedom of choice. Being cynical though, at least it gets people looking at your profile? | |||
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" A vegan can go into McDonald's for a coffee. But it doesn't mean they have to order a double cheeseburger just because of the environment. In am endless debate regarding this on Fab, this has to be the best answer yet. Brilliant. " | |||
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"I thought BBC meant big bald cock. " I thought it was big beautiful cunt. | |||
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"Surely as a site all about sex. It’s about meeting people you find attractive. Everyone has certain traits they like. Personally I don’t like fat gingers, but should I sleep with them so I don’t upset them? " Yes. Yes you should. | |||
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"Fighting a losing battle I'm afraid. People will defend it as their 'preference' and its their right to choose. What can ya do? Nothing need be done. It IS their preference and right to choose. Should people change their right to choose simply because it's a swinging site? A vegan can go into McDonald's for a coffee. But it doesn't mean they have to order a double cheeseburger just because of the environment. " Pmsl | |||
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"I thought BBC meant big bald cock. I thought it was big beautiful cunt. " like to think yours are more beautiful than big | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ " People of colour!? | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ People of colour!? " "People of colour" is a perfectly acceptable decriptor, famously and most recently championed by Michelle Obama and her husband | |||
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"Well said... Promotion in this 'field' is fine when it advantageous to certain indivuals... Hypocrisy lifting its' head once again..." Not hipocracy at all - we all highlight the positives about ourselves whatever they might be, and if there is a demographic that looks for a particular positive, why wouldn't we "promote" it? | |||
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"This is exactly what I think, but you've said it much more eloquently than me. Thanks What a number of folks responding to this haven't appreciated is that the term 'BBC' is absolutely loaded with racial stereotyping, which goes back to when black men were subjugated by whites and thought of (amongst other terrible things) as savages from the jungle. Let's be absolutely clear, there's nowt wrong with having a preference and appreciation for well hung black men, but surely there are better ways to express that preference? Another article on the issue: https://melmagazine.com/en-us/story/living-with-the-myth-of-the-big-black-cock " All I get from that is that the lesser-endowed black man feels insecure that they can’t live up to the stereotype, I’m not sure those black men with a larger appendage would feel so offended. More fool the people who only target the black men in the hope he’s going to be hung like a horse, the man in question could be seen as the one using the myth to his advantage. And ultimately, if he, or anyone else, feels they are being used as some sort of fetish accessory they do have a choice as to whether or not they proceed. Lou x | |||
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"Fighting a losing battle I'm afraid. People will defend it as their 'preference' and its their right to choose. What can ya do? Nothing need be done. It IS their preference and right to choose. Should people change their right to choose simply because it's a swinging site? A vegan can go into McDonald's for a coffee. But it doesn't mean they have to order a double cheeseburger just because of the environment. " For clarification I agree. People are entitled to a preference. Regarding the regressive connotations of the term BBC, I think the black population has bigger fish to fry than concerns over a stereotype which is of some actual benefit to them. Haven't read the articles so maybe I am missing part of the argument. | |||
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"Anyone who thinks I've posted this thread to 'draw attention to my profile'. I mean c'mon! Seriously?! I posted because I find the language regressive and I think we, as a community, could and should do better! " You seem to be missing the point of every post on your thread. | |||
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"Why is it so difficult to hold both of the following views. 1. Everyone is entitled to complete sexual autonomy and is free to have consensual sex with anyone they choose. 2. There are some sexual preferences essentially based on racist stereotypes. The BBC fetish being one of them. " If you'd used the word "racial" instead of "racist" then I'd agree with you - "racist" however infers being against something which those with that particular sexual preference clearly are not. | |||
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"Why is it so difficult to hold both of the following views. 1. Everyone is entitled to complete sexual autonomy and is free to have consensual sex with anyone they choose." That's the thing. "Consensual sex with anyone they choose" seem to be words that some people find impossible to comprehend. You could almost believe that freedom of choice is becoming unacceptable, being eroded away. And that you must, without question, do what another demands of you in case refusal offends them. This, of course, is irrelevant of your personal feelings. It's a pretty sad state of affairs really. | |||
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"Why is it so difficult to hold both of the following views. 1. Everyone is entitled to complete sexual autonomy and is free to have consensual sex with anyone they choose. 2. There are some sexual preferences essentially based on racist stereotypes. The BBC fetish being one of them. If you'd used the word "racial" instead of "racist" then I'd agree with you - "racist" however infers being against something which those with that particular sexual preference clearly are not." I suspect it derives from earlier racist tropes around ideas of barbarism, brute strength, and increased virility. Some may still hold those views. I find it uncomfortable, but don't wish to deny individual autonomy even where broader cultural ideas require scrutiny. | |||
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"Why is it so difficult to hold both of the following views. 1. Everyone is entitled to complete sexual autonomy and is free to have consensual sex with anyone they choose. 2. There are some sexual preferences essentially based on racist stereotypes. The BBC fetish being one of them. If you'd used the word "racial" instead of "racist" then I'd agree with you - "racist" however infers being against something which those with that particular sexual preference clearly are not." It is possible to feed into certain racist stereotypes about, say, black people without feeding into all of them. | |||
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"Why is it so difficult to hold both of the following views. 1. Everyone is entitled to complete sexual autonomy and is free to have consensual sex with anyone they choose. 2. There are some sexual preferences essentially based on racist stereotypes. The BBC fetish being one of them. If you'd used the word "racial" instead of "racist" then I'd agree with you - "racist" however infers being against something which those with that particular sexual preference clearly are not. I suspect it derives from earlier racist tropes around ideas of barbarism, brute strength, and increased virility. Some may still hold those views. I find it uncomfortable, but don't wish to deny individual autonomy even where broader cultural ideas require scrutiny. " My succinct summary is that you can be as racist as fuck when choosing with whom you have sex with. But let's not deceive ourselves about what's going on. | |||
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"Why is it so difficult to hold both of the following views. 1. Everyone is entitled to complete sexual autonomy and is free to have consensual sex with anyone they choose. 2. There are some sexual preferences essentially based on racist stereotypes. The BBC fetish being one of them. If you'd used the word "racial" instead of "racist" then I'd agree with you - "racist" however infers being against something which those with that particular sexual preference clearly are not. I suspect it derives from earlier racist tropes around ideas of barbarism, brute strength, and increased virility. Some may still hold those views. I find it uncomfortable, but don't wish to deny individual autonomy even where broader cultural ideas require scrutiny. My succinct summary is that you can be as racist as fuck when choosing with whom you have sex with. But let's not deceive ourselves about what's going on. " Agreed entirely. | |||
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"Why is it so difficult to hold both of the following views. 1. Everyone is entitled to complete sexual autonomy and is free to have consensual sex with anyone they choose. 2. There are some sexual preferences essentially based on racist stereotypes. The BBC fetish being one of them. If you'd used the word "racial" instead of "racist" then I'd agree with you - "racist" however infers being against something which those with that particular sexual preference clearly are not. I suspect it derives from earlier racist tropes around ideas of barbarism, brute strength, and increased virility. Some may still hold those views. I find it uncomfortable, but don't wish to deny individual autonomy even where broader cultural ideas require scrutiny. My succinct summary is that you can be as racist as fuck when choosing with whom you have sex with. But let's not deceive ourselves about what's going on. Agreed entirely. " I think a lot of the confusion is around the idea that calling something racist is saying that you shouldn't be allowed to do it. That's not necessarily the case. You shouldn't be allowed to be racist in public spheres as that impacts on others. If you want to be racist in private spheres, amongst family, friends and sexual partners say, that's up to you. People who don't like that kind of thing can choose not be friends with you or have sex with you. | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ People of colour!? "People of colour" is a perfectly acceptable decriptor, famously and most recently championed by Michelle Obama and her husband " People of colour? I haven't come across a "person of colour" that describes themselves as that. What are they? Rainbow coloured? And if you describe black as people of colour what are white people? Colourless? | |||
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"Why is it so difficult to hold both of the following views. 1. Everyone is entitled to complete sexual autonomy and is free to have consensual sex with anyone they choose. 2. There are some sexual preferences essentially based on racist stereotypes. The BBC fetish being one of them. If you'd used the word "racial" instead of "racist" then I'd agree with you - "racist" however infers being against something which those with that particular sexual preference clearly are not. It is possible to feed into certain racist stereotypes about, say, black people without feeding into all of them. " There's still a distinct difference between a "racial stereotype" and a "racist stereotype" though by my definition | |||
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"Why is it so difficult to hold both of the following views. 1. Everyone is entitled to complete sexual autonomy and is free to have consensual sex with anyone they choose. 2. There are some sexual preferences essentially based on racist stereotypes. The BBC fetish being one of them. If you'd used the word "racial" instead of "racist" then I'd agree with you - "racist" however infers being against something which those with that particular sexual preference clearly are not. I suspect it derives from earlier racist tropes around ideas of barbarism, brute strength, and increased virility. Some may still hold those views. I find it uncomfortable, but don't wish to deny individual autonomy even where broader cultural ideas require scrutiny. My succinct summary is that you can be as racist as fuck when choosing with whom you have sex with. But let's not deceive ourselves about what's going on. Agreed entirely. I think a lot of the confusion is around the idea that calling something racist is saying that you shouldn't be allowed to do it. That's not necessarily the case. You shouldn't be allowed to be racist in public spheres as that impacts on others. If you want to be racist in private spheres, amongst family, friends and sexual partners say, that's up to you. People who don't like that kind of thing can choose not be friends with you or have sex with you. " Indeed. I feel this is a case of choosing what's worse, and individual autonomy trumps here. Tackling broader stereotypes requires different action. | |||
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"Why is it so difficult to hold both of the following views. 1. Everyone is entitled to complete sexual autonomy and is free to have consensual sex with anyone they choose. 2. There are some sexual preferences essentially based on racist stereotypes. The BBC fetish being one of them. If you'd used the word "racial" instead of "racist" then I'd agree with you - "racist" however infers being against something which those with that particular sexual preference clearly are not. It is possible to feed into certain racist stereotypes about, say, black people without feeding into all of them. There's still a distinct difference between a "racial stereotype" and a "racist stereotype" though by my definition " I would say a racist stereotype is one that ascribes negative characteristic to an ethnic group. I would say the stereotype that ascribes hyper sexuality to black men is such a stereotype and it is that stereotype from which the BBC fetish derives. | |||
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"Why is it so difficult to hold both of the following views. 1. Everyone is entitled to complete sexual autonomy and is free to have consensual sex with anyone they choose. 2. There are some sexual preferences essentially based on racist stereotypes. The BBC fetish being one of them. If you'd used the word "racial" instead of "racist" then I'd agree with you - "racist" however infers being against something which those with that particular sexual preference clearly are not. I suspect it derives from earlier racist tropes around ideas of barbarism, brute strength, and increased virility. Some may still hold those views. I find it uncomfortable, but don't wish to deny individual autonomy even where broader cultural ideas require scrutiny. My succinct summary is that you can be as racist as fuck when choosing with whom you have sex with. But let's not deceive ourselves about what's going on. Agreed entirely. I think a lot of the confusion is around the idea that calling something racist is saying that you shouldn't be allowed to do it. That's not necessarily the case. You shouldn't be allowed to be racist in public spheres as that impacts on others. If you want to be racist in private spheres, amongst family, friends and sexual partners say, that's up to you. People who don't like that kind of thing can choose not be friends with you or have sex with you. Indeed. I feel this is a case of choosing what's worse, and individual autonomy trumps here. Tackling broader stereotypes requires different action. " It's fundamentally about the right to privacy. I think it's extremely important that people have the right to be as obnoxious as they like in private. Otherwise we're into Thought Police territory. | |||
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"Why is it so difficult to hold both of the following views. 1. Everyone is entitled to complete sexual autonomy and is free to have consensual sex with anyone they choose. 2. There are some sexual preferences essentially based on racist stereotypes. The BBC fetish being one of them. If you'd used the word "racial" instead of "racist" then I'd agree with you - "racist" however infers being against something which those with that particular sexual preference clearly are not. I suspect it derives from earlier racist tropes around ideas of barbarism, brute strength, and increased virility. Some may still hold those views. I find it uncomfortable, but don't wish to deny individual autonomy even where broader cultural ideas require scrutiny. My succinct summary is that you can be as racist as fuck when choosing with whom you have sex with. But let's not deceive ourselves about what's going on. Agreed entirely. I think a lot of the confusion is around the idea that calling something racist is saying that you shouldn't be allowed to do it. That's not necessarily the case. You shouldn't be allowed to be racist in public spheres as that impacts on others. If you want to be racist in private spheres, amongst family, friends and sexual partners say, that's up to you. People who don't like that kind of thing can choose not be friends with you or have sex with you. Indeed. I feel this is a case of choosing what's worse, and individual autonomy trumps here. Tackling broader stereotypes requires different action. It's fundamentally about the right to privacy. I think it's extremely important that people have the right to be as obnoxious as they like in private. Otherwise we're into Thought Police territory. " Sure. We're on different points on the spectrum on this one, but I think any influence here should be indirect and broader. Ultimately with the aim of individual influence, but not as intrusive. | |||
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"Why are other people offended by terms not used at them. I get messages from guys on a regular basis asking if I like BBC... from guys who obviously feel they fit that criteria. It's like someone got offended for me last week when a guy said in chat he doesn't like big girls.. it was the guys choice x " I don't make a thing of it outside discussions like these. But applying attributes to someone because of their skin colour, national heritage etc, is often racist (even where they might seem positive or have positive impact). I don't want to live in a racist society. People can seek and fuck who they like, but the thought patterns behind these things are worth examining. | |||
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"Fighting a losing battle I'm afraid. People will defend it as their 'preference' and its their right to choose. What can ya do? Nothing need be done. It IS their preference and right to choose. Should people change their right to choose simply because it's a swinging site? A vegan can go into McDonald's for a coffee. But it doesn't mean they have to order a double cheeseburger just because of the environment. " great analogy and totally agree. | |||
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"Why is it so difficult to hold both of the following views. 1. Everyone is entitled to complete sexual autonomy and is free to have consensual sex with anyone they choose. 2. There are some sexual preferences essentially based on racist stereotypes. The BBC fetish being one of them. If you'd used the word "racial" instead of "racist" then I'd agree with you - "racist" however infers being against something which those with that particular sexual preference clearly are not. I suspect it derives from earlier racist tropes around ideas of barbarism, brute strength, and increased virility. Some may still hold those views. I find it uncomfortable, but don't wish to deny individual autonomy even where broader cultural ideas require scrutiny. My succinct summary is that you can be as racist as fuck when choosing with whom you have sex with. But let's not deceive ourselves about what's going on. Agreed entirely. I think a lot of the confusion is around the idea that calling something racist is saying that you shouldn't be allowed to do it. That's not necessarily the case. You shouldn't be allowed to be racist in public spheres as that impacts on others. If you want to be racist in private spheres, amongst family, friends and sexual partners say, that's up to you. People who don't like that kind of thing can choose not be friends with you or have sex with you. Indeed. I feel this is a case of choosing what's worse, and individual autonomy trumps here. Tackling broader stereotypes requires different action. It's fundamentally about the right to privacy. I think it's extremely important that people have the right to be as obnoxious as they like in private. Otherwise we're into Thought Police territory. Sure. We're on different points on the spectrum on this one, but I think any influence here should be indirect and broader. Ultimately with the aim of individual influence, but not as intrusive. " I'm all for rational discussion of people's views and the assumptions behind them. Bit like we're doing here. I suppose what I jib against is any kind of inquisition, whether state or society based, where "wrong think" is actively sought out and condemned. | |||
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"Fighting a losing battle I'm afraid. People will defend it as their 'preference' and its their right to choose. What can ya do? Nothing need be done. It IS their preference and right to choose. Should people change their right to choose simply because it's a swinging site? A vegan can go into McDonald's for a coffee. But it doesn't mean they have to order a double cheeseburger just because of the environment. " The example is wrong in regard to race on Fab and swinging. In my experience the correct illustration is being hungry and most of the restaurants on the high street will let you in but won't serve you because you are black. The high street has only two restaurants at which you will get served as a black man. Although in one you will only be served if you conform to the stereotype of BBC. [The above is an illustration for explanation, sex is not guaranteed at any interracial party even if you are black.] Therefore the response is for black men (and the women who like black men) to set up their own pop up restaurant advertised for people who have no problems mingling with black men. Hence the interracial parties, where at least you know as a black man you have a good chance of playing whereas in a mainstream party the chances are low. Therefore when people say black men write to them emphasising the stereotypical aspects. The reason is because that is basically the only succesful form of marketing for black men. Emphasing intelligence, sense of humour or other characteristic does not cut it. In my view despite the 'supposed prevelence' of interracial sex my experience is that British society is still very ringfenced and in reality outside of the big cities and towns it is not very common. | |||
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"Why is it so difficult to hold both of the following views. 1. Everyone is entitled to complete sexual autonomy and is free to have consensual sex with anyone they choose. 2. There are some sexual preferences essentially based on racist stereotypes. The BBC fetish being one of them. If you'd used the word "racial" instead of "racist" then I'd agree with you - "racist" however infers being against something which those with that particular sexual preference clearly are not. It is possible to feed into certain racist stereotypes about, say, black people without feeding into all of them. There's still a distinct difference between a "racial stereotype" and a "racist stereotype" though by my definition I would say a racist stereotype is one that ascribes negative characteristic to an ethnic group. I would say the stereotype that ascribes hyper sexuality to black men is such a stereotype and it is that stereotype from which the BBC fetish derives. " I'd disagree that particular characteristic is ascribed either negatively or to a whole group though which may be the underlying difference - yes it's a fetish for some, and a preference for others but is racist? I personally don't think so, is it racial? By it's definition it is. Is it any different from VWE, BBW or any other acronym that is descriptive? Not at all. | |||
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"Why is it so difficult to hold both of the following views. 1. Everyone is entitled to complete sexual autonomy and is free to have consensual sex with anyone they choose. 2. There are some sexual preferences essentially based on racist stereotypes. The BBC fetish being one of them. If you'd used the word "racial" instead of "racist" then I'd agree with you - "racist" however infers being against something which those with that particular sexual preference clearly are not. It is possible to feed into certain racist stereotypes about, say, black people without feeding into all of them. There's still a distinct difference between a "racial stereotype" and a "racist stereotype" though by my definition I would say a racist stereotype is one that ascribes negative characteristic to an ethnic group. I would say the stereotype that ascribes hyper sexuality to black men is such a stereotype and it is that stereotype from which the BBC fetish derives. I'd disagree that particular characteristic is ascribed either negatively or to a whole group though which may be the underlying difference - yes it's a fetish for some, and a preference for others but is racist? I personally don't think so, is it racial? By it's definition it is. Is it any different from VWE, BBW or any other acronym that is descriptive? Not at all." I'd say it is because there's a whole history of racist stereotyping around black men having uncontrolled hyper sexuality and thus being dangerous to white women and being physical rather than intellectual beings. The whole BBC fetish is based on that. As I say, if that's what you're into fill your boots, but let's know what we're into. | |||
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"I thought BBC meant big bald cock. " I thought BBC was Big Brown Cock | |||
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"Why is it so difficult to hold both of the following views. 1. Everyone is entitled to complete sexual autonomy and is free to have consensual sex with anyone they choose. 2. There are some sexual preferences essentially based on racist stereotypes. The BBC fetish being one of them. If you'd used the word "racial" instead of "racist" then I'd agree with you - "racist" however infers being against something which those with that particular sexual preference clearly are not. I suspect it derives from earlier racist tropes around ideas of barbarism, brute strength, and increased virility. Some may still hold those views. I find it uncomfortable, but don't wish to deny individual autonomy even where broader cultural ideas require scrutiny. My succinct summary is that you can be as racist as fuck when choosing with whom you have sex with. But let's not deceive ourselves about what's going on. Agreed entirely. I think a lot of the confusion is around the idea that calling something racist is saying that you shouldn't be allowed to do it. That's not necessarily the case. You shouldn't be allowed to be racist in public spheres as that impacts on others. If you want to be racist in private spheres, amongst family, friends and sexual partners say, that's up to you. People who don't like that kind of thing can choose not be friends with you or have sex with you. Indeed. I feel this is a case of choosing what's worse, and individual autonomy trumps here. Tackling broader stereotypes requires different action. It's fundamentally about the right to privacy. I think it's extremely important that people have the right to be as obnoxious as they like in private. Otherwise we're into Thought Police territory. Sure. We're on different points on the spectrum on this one, but I think any influence here should be indirect and broader. Ultimately with the aim of individual influence, but not as intrusive. I'm all for rational discussion of people's views and the assumptions behind them. Bit like we're doing here. I suppose what I jib against is any kind of inquisition, whether state or society based, where "wrong think" is actively sought out and condemned. " Fair enough. Whereas I think some negative persuasion about stigma and prejudice is warranted. Not necessarily "You're not allowed to think X", but, for example, it's really not cool to think (bad thing) about (minority group), and you'll probably suffer social consequences if you do it publicly. I think that kind of thing does have to have a big, broad base. | |||
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"Why is it so difficult to hold both of the following views. 1. Everyone is entitled to complete sexual autonomy and is free to have consensual sex with anyone they choose. 2. There are some sexual preferences essentially based on racist stereotypes. The BBC fetish being one of them. If you'd used the word "racial" instead of "racist" then I'd agree with you - "racist" however infers being against something which those with that particular sexual preference clearly are not. I suspect it derives from earlier racist tropes around ideas of barbarism, brute strength, and increased virility. Some may still hold those views. I find it uncomfortable, but don't wish to deny individual autonomy even where broader cultural ideas require scrutiny. My succinct summary is that you can be as racist as fuck when choosing with whom you have sex with. But let's not deceive ourselves about what's going on. Agreed entirely. I think a lot of the confusion is around the idea that calling something racist is saying that you shouldn't be allowed to do it. That's not necessarily the case. You shouldn't be allowed to be racist in public spheres as that impacts on others. If you want to be racist in private spheres, amongst family, friends and sexual partners say, that's up to you. People who don't like that kind of thing can choose not be friends with you or have sex with you. Indeed. I feel this is a case of choosing what's worse, and individual autonomy trumps here. Tackling broader stereotypes requires different action. It's fundamentally about the right to privacy. I think it's extremely important that people have the right to be as obnoxious as they like in private. Otherwise we're into Thought Police territory. Sure. We're on different points on the spectrum on this one, but I think any influence here should be indirect and broader. Ultimately with the aim of individual influence, but not as intrusive. I'm all for rational discussion of people's views and the assumptions behind them. Bit like we're doing here. I suppose what I jib against is any kind of inquisition, whether state or society based, where "wrong think" is actively sought out and condemned. Fair enough. Whereas I think some negative persuasion about stigma and prejudice is warranted. Not necessarily "You're not allowed to think X", but, for example, it's really not cool to think (bad thing) about (minority group), and you'll probably suffer social consequences if you do it publicly. I think that kind of thing does have to have a big, broad base. " I don't think anyone could live in UK society today without realising that the vast majority of people consider racism to be a bad thing. Hence, I am not sure we need to go around looking for and shaming private racism. Apart from anything else it's likely to be counter productive as they will then consider themselves persecuted martyrs. | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ People of colour!? "People of colour" is a perfectly acceptable decriptor, famously and most recently championed by Michelle Obama and her husband People of colour? I haven't come across a "person of colour" that describes themselves as that. What are they? Rainbow coloured? And if you describe black as people of colour what are white people? Colourless? " I don't know, you'd have to ask the Obamas but it seems to be an acceptable term in the US, maybe not so much here? Al Sharpton uses that phrase too, and who am I to argue with one of the greatest civil rights activists that's ever lived? | |||
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"Why is it so difficult to hold both of the following views. 1. Everyone is entitled to complete sexual autonomy and is free to have consensual sex with anyone they choose. 2. There are some sexual preferences essentially based on racist stereotypes. The BBC fetish being one of them. If you'd used the word "racial" instead of "racist" then I'd agree with you - "racist" however infers being against something which those with that particular sexual preference clearly are not. I suspect it derives from earlier racist tropes around ideas of barbarism, brute strength, and increased virility. Some may still hold those views. I find it uncomfortable, but don't wish to deny individual autonomy even where broader cultural ideas require scrutiny. My succinct summary is that you can be as racist as fuck when choosing with whom you have sex with. But let's not deceive ourselves about what's going on. Agreed entirely. I think a lot of the confusion is around the idea that calling something racist is saying that you shouldn't be allowed to do it. That's not necessarily the case. You shouldn't be allowed to be racist in public spheres as that impacts on others. If you want to be racist in private spheres, amongst family, friends and sexual partners say, that's up to you. People who don't like that kind of thing can choose not be friends with you or have sex with you. Indeed. I feel this is a case of choosing what's worse, and individual autonomy trumps here. Tackling broader stereotypes requires different action. It's fundamentally about the right to privacy. I think it's extremely important that people have the right to be as obnoxious as they like in private. Otherwise we're into Thought Police territory. Sure. We're on different points on the spectrum on this one, but I think any influence here should be indirect and broader. Ultimately with the aim of individual influence, but not as intrusive. I'm all for rational discussion of people's views and the assumptions behind them. Bit like we're doing here. I suppose what I jib against is any kind of inquisition, whether state or society based, where "wrong think" is actively sought out and condemned. Fair enough. Whereas I think some negative persuasion about stigma and prejudice is warranted. Not necessarily "You're not allowed to think X", but, for example, it's really not cool to think (bad thing) about (minority group), and you'll probably suffer social consequences if you do it publicly. I think that kind of thing does have to have a big, broad base. I don't think anyone could live in UK society today without realising that the vast majority of people consider racism to be a bad thing. Hence, I am not sure we need to go around looking for and shaming private racism. Apart from anything else it's likely to be counter productive as they will then consider themselves persecuted martyrs. " Mostly agreed. I think the boundaries shift and further discussion will always be needed, but this isn't for me about what's done in private (except that individuals can choose to apply personal consequences for behaviour they can't abide). This is about what's done in public/ in a work capacity (potentially broader for those in the public eye and/or working with vulnerable groups, but the boundaries there are going to be incredibly difficult). | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ " Here’s my opinion on this. The world is full of different coloured people, I don’t see how it’s racist to describe a person by their colour. People don’t get all offended by being described by their hair colour, so why is describing them by skin colour different? | |||
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"Why is it so difficult to hold both of the following views. 1. Everyone is entitled to complete sexual autonomy and is free to have consensual sex with anyone they choose. 2. There are some sexual preferences essentially based on racist stereotypes. The BBC fetish being one of them. If you'd used the word "racial" instead of "racist" then I'd agree with you - "racist" however infers being against something which those with that particular sexual preference clearly are not. I suspect it derives from earlier racist tropes around ideas of barbarism, brute strength, and increased virility. Some may still hold those views. I find it uncomfortable, but don't wish to deny individual autonomy even where broader cultural ideas require scrutiny. My succinct summary is that you can be as racist as fuck when choosing with whom you have sex with. But let's not deceive ourselves about what's going on. Agreed entirely. I think a lot of the confusion is around the idea that calling something racist is saying that you shouldn't be allowed to do it. That's not necessarily the case. You shouldn't be allowed to be racist in public spheres as that impacts on others. If you want to be racist in private spheres, amongst family, friends and sexual partners say, that's up to you. People who don't like that kind of thing can choose not be friends with you or have sex with you. Indeed. I feel this is a case of choosing what's worse, and individual autonomy trumps here. Tackling broader stereotypes requires different action. It's fundamentally about the right to privacy. I think it's extremely important that people have the right to be as obnoxious as they like in private. Otherwise we're into Thought Police territory. Sure. We're on different points on the spectrum on this one, but I think any influence here should be indirect and broader. Ultimately with the aim of individual influence, but not as intrusive. I'm all for rational discussion of people's views and the assumptions behind them. Bit like we're doing here. I suppose what I jib against is any kind of inquisition, whether state or society based, where "wrong think" is actively sought out and condemned. Fair enough. Whereas I think some negative persuasion about stigma and prejudice is warranted. Not necessarily "You're not allowed to think X", but, for example, it's really not cool to think (bad thing) about (minority group), and you'll probably suffer social consequences if you do it publicly. I think that kind of thing does have to have a big, broad base. I don't think anyone could live in UK society today without realising that the vast majority of people consider racism to be a bad thing. Hence, I am not sure we need to go around looking for and shaming private racism. Apart from anything else it's likely to be counter productive as they will then consider themselves persecuted martyrs. Mostly agreed. I think the boundaries shift and further discussion will always be needed, but this isn't for me about what's done in private (except that individuals can choose to apply personal consequences for behaviour they can't abide). This is about what's done in public/ in a work capacity (potentially broader for those in the public eye and/or working with vulnerable groups, but the boundaries there are going to be incredibly difficult). " That's what I said initially. Racism in public should be stamped on | |||
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"a couple of things here..... 1) for every profile you show me that says "bbc" on it... i bet i can show you one that says "no blacks"...... would this be the same racial stereotyping that you seem to be objecting to?....... 2) preference! their body, their rules!.... people are here to have fun, they are not here to provide a service to all and sundry...... 3) the whole BBC thing will only ever end if: a)people make it known of their distaste for it all by not advertising or the point gets across that they are actually turning off as many of their target audience as they do turn on.... b)black guys having more self respect for themselves by not having their whole being defined by part of their body none of that is happening anytime soon...... whilst people see it as an advantage to getting their leg over they will use when it work... or complain when it doesn't!" Once again in these type of debates I find myself in full agreement with you. Sorry i did not see your post earlier. Why do Black Men use the BBC term? See above. Should people be defined solely by skin colour or the assumed size of thier dick? I seam to recall the speach of a great man who said he dreamed of a day when people were judged on the content of thier carictor. I note that no one has picked up on the difference bettween the issue in relation to Black Woman. Nor the effect of the issue when Black is exchanged for Asian men. Everyone has preferences thats fine, i dont like Bigots or Trunp voters. People are not required to sleep with anyone they do not wish to. Thats Slavery (real not pantomine). But the fact remains that a Person is the sum of Many Many factors from the way they look to the life experiences they have had and the attitudes they hold and more. I have a preferance for people and hold that above the attraction to machines. Societal norms in the Vanilla world hold Massive steriotype veiws on ALL of us based on this one aspect of our being sex. Given that fact you would hope that we would understand at least vicariously the experiences of others treated that way? But saddly we seam doomed to import to this world the faults of the outside world. Sad really. Well on to the wonderful shmorgusbord of swinging, seams fewer guests so more tasty Morsals for us Brother. | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ Here’s my opinion on this. The world is full of different coloured people, I don’t see how it’s racist to describe a person by their colour. People don’t get all offended by being described by their hair colour, so why is describing them by skin colour different? " because when people use words to describe someone's race or ethnicity or faith, it can be loaded with negative connotations. 'you black/jewish/muslim so and so.' | |||
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"Why is it so difficult to hold both of the following views. 1. Everyone is entitled to complete sexual autonomy and is free to have consensual sex with anyone they choose. That's the thing. "Consensual sex with anyone they choose" seem to be words that some people find impossible to comprehend. You could almost believe that freedom of choice is becoming unacceptable, being eroded away. And that you must, without question, do what another demands of you in case refusal offends them. This, of course, is irrelevant of your personal feelings. It's a pretty sad state of affairs really." | |||
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"I fail to see how something that is factual can be stereotyping? If a black guy calls himself a BBC then two 100% facts are that he is black and he has a cock, the other is subjective but if he has a 9inch penis I think that also becomes a fact. If a lady/couple wish to meet a BBC then all it is is an acronym, not a stereotype. " Absolutely | |||
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"What if someone is just not attracted to an entire group of people? E.g. Asian, Chinese, French? Some people would say they are being racist as they are excluding everyone in that group. But if they are only excluding that group for sex and nothing else then surely that's fine and not racist at all. " speaking as a chinese... I have no problem if people don't wanna fuck me based on my ethnicity. Is what it is. Not like I'm being discriminated against for a job. Unless I'm applying to be a russian spy. I can understand why i might fail on that. | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ " Id just like to pick up on one of your original points here OP, you base a lot of your observations on the premise that this site is full of inclusive and broadminded people. That this is a community of enlightened individuals who, because we all have an open attitude to sex, also have an enlightened attitude towards sexuality, race, gender or kink/fetish. I hate to burst your bubble OP. Yes you will find some like that here, some of them have posted on this thread. You will also find very closed minded and bigoted people too. Think of fab as a microcosm of the internet as a whole, with more risqué pictures. I once thought as you do, the realisation however was rather disheartening. | |||
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"What if someone is just not attracted to an entire group of people? E.g. Asian, Chinese, French? Some people would say they are being racist as they are excluding everyone in that group. But if they are only excluding that group for sex and nothing else then surely that's fine and not racist at all. speaking as a chinese... I have no problem if people don't wanna fuck me based on my ethnicity. Is what it is. Not like I'm being discriminated against for a job. Unless I'm applying to be a russian spy. I can understand why i might fail on that. " Do they advertise for Russian spies? They get to go visit tourist area. Might be a good job, give it a go. | |||
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"What if someone is just not attracted to an entire group of people? E.g. Asian, Chinese, French? Some people would say they are being racist as they are excluding everyone in that group. But if they are only excluding that group for sex and nothing else then surely that's fine and not racist at all. speaking as a chinese... I have no problem if people don't wanna fuck me based on my ethnicity. Is what it is. Not like I'm being discriminated against for a job. Unless I'm applying to be a russian spy. I can understand why i might fail on that. Do they advertise for Russian spies? They get to go visit tourist area. Might be a good job, give it a go. " can't... Im already working for those koreans. | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ " yes,,some blatant racism on here | |||
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"Great post Op... I think the only way forward is for Fab to mandate than every woman and couple has to sleep with a black guy or be banned... This will be a history making moment for social justice .... On a side note...... Please don’t be offended on the behalf of black men..... We are intelligent enough to voice our opinions if something offends us...." Well said! | |||
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"Like most topics there's a whole lot more to it than just a simple, binary, black and white (forgive the unintended pun) answer. To the OP I think the view is misplaced. I think it is a sexual stereotype that is a sort of hang over from porn which then spilled over into life. And people who are using the term as something they are looking for I don't believe is intended as a racial stereotype but a sexual preference. People may also put on their profiles about who they don't want to see which can come across as a racial stereotype or even a slur, but again, it is almost certainly going to be because: a) They don't get turned on by people with whatever characteristic they are saying they don't want to meet b) They may have had a number of bad experiences and have found that they don't want to risk another one c) A combination of A and B The question to the OP is why do you think Fab needs to do something about it? Do you want to influence and change what people's sexual preferences are because they don't fit in with your personal view of "correctness"? Maybe you are quite happy to be open to meeting and maybe even having sexual experiences with any nationality, shape, size, colour, diversity. If so, cool. Good for you. But that's you. Not everyone is the same and some people are quite specific about what they like. And that preference may be something they have evolved to over a period of some time and considerable experience. " well said | |||
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"Without meaning to cause offence to anyone, why are these threads always started by a concerned white guy? " Because often they think that people will admire them for their empathy, personally I find it in bad taste, if some black men want to be referred to as bbc, it's got feck all to do with anyone else. | |||
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"Without meaning to cause offence to anyone, why are these threads always started by a concerned white guy? Because often they think that people will admire them for their empathy, personally I find it in bad taste, if some black men want to be referred to as bbc, it's got feck all to do with anyone else. " | |||
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"Like most topics there's a whole lot more to it than just a simple, binary, black and white (forgive the unintended pun) answer. To the OP I think the view is misplaced. I think it is a sexual stereotype that is a sort of hang over from porn which then spilled over into life. And people who are using the term as something they are looking for I don't believe is intended as a racial stereotype but a sexual preference. People may also put on their profiles about who they don't want to see which can come across as a racial stereotype or even a slur, but again, it is almost certainly going to be because: a) They don't get turned on by people with whatever characteristic they are saying they don't want to meet b) They may have had a number of bad experiences and have found that they don't want to risk another one c) A combination of A and B The question to the OP is why do you think Fab needs to do something about it? Do you want to influence and change what people's sexual preferences are because they don't fit in with your personal view of "correctness"? Maybe you are quite happy to be open to meeting and maybe even having sexual experiences with any nationality, shape, size, colour, diversity. If so, cool. Good for you. But that's you. Not everyone is the same and some people are quite specific about what they like. And that preference may be something they have evolved to over a period of some time and considerable experience. well said " Thank you | |||
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"I have to say a lot of black men’s profiles thar I have seen have been based around being a BBC.....those people therefore appear to play on the ‘racial stereotyping’.... " ?? % agree x | |||
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"I'm just here for the D, no matter what colour it is." | |||
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"I'm just here for the D, no matter what colour it is." great! Mine is green! | |||
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"I'm just here for the D, no matter what colour it is.great! Mine is green! " Dip it in Dettol, it should be fine | |||
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"Without meaning to cause offence to anyone, why are these threads always started by a concerned white guy? " Because it’s these white guy’s duty to make sure black men are not sexually exploited in the swinging scene.... We must be treated with respect and dignity... | |||
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"Without meaning to cause offence to anyone, why are these threads always started by a concerned white guy? Because it’s these white guy’s duty to make sure black men are not sexually exploited in the swinging scene.... We must be treated with respect and dignity..." You're just a big sex toy. | |||
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"Like most topics there's a whole lot more to it than just a simple, binary, black and white (forgive the unintended pun) answer. To the OP I think the view is misplaced. I think it is a sexual stereotype that is a sort of hang over from porn which then spilled over into life. And people who are using the term as something they are looking for I don't believe is intended as a racial stereotype but a sexual preference. People may also put on their profiles about who they don't want to see which can come across as a racial stereotype or even a slur, but again, it is almost certainly going to be because: a) They don't get turned on by people with whatever characteristic they are saying they don't want to meet b) They may have had a number of bad experiences and have found that they don't want to risk another one c) A combination of A and B The question to the OP is why do you think Fab needs to do something about it? Do you want to influence and change what people's sexual preferences are because they don't fit in with your personal view of "correctness"? Maybe you are quite happy to be open to meeting and maybe even having sexual experiences with any nationality, shape, size, colour, diversity. If so, cool. Good for you. But that's you. Not everyone is the same and some people are quite specific about what they like. And that preference may be something they have evolved to over a period of some time and considerable experience. well said Thank you " With respect I think your argument is a bit confused. Just because people don't intend to racially stereotype when using a phrase to express a preference, doesn't mean they aren't racially stereotyping when they use said phrase. Also, I'm at a loss as exactly where I said or indicated that I wanted to influence people's sexual preferences? I just think in 2019 there are better ways to express those preferences without having to resort to the same old clichés/tropes. Which as you yourself suggest are a hang over from porn, amongst many other things. | |||
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"a couple of things here..... 1) for every profile you show me that says "bbc" on it... i bet i can show you one that says "no blacks"...... would this be the same racial stereotyping that you seem to be objecting to?....... 2) preference! their body, their rules!.... people are here to have fun, they are not here to provide a service to all and sundry...... 3) the whole BBC thing will only ever end if: a)people make it known of their distaste for it all by not advertising or the point gets across that they are actually turning off as many of their target audience as they do turn on.... b)black guys having more self respect for themselves by not having their whole being defined by part of their body none of that is happening anytime soon...... whilst people see it as an advantage to getting their leg over they will use when it work... or complain when it doesn't!" Extremely well put as always. | |||
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"Without meaning to cause offence to anyone, why are these threads always started by a concerned white guy? " ...just what we thought! | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ " So its wrong to only want Black. My partner is Black. I have no desire to go with a white guy. I say in our profile. Do i not have the right to choose who i fuck. Its not racism it is preference and just that | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ So its wrong to only want Black. My partner is Black. I have no desire to go with a white guy. I say in our profile. Do i not have the right to choose who i fuck. Its not racism it is preference and just that " No one is saying you cant have a genuine Preference. I suppose from my prespective it is about people knowing why they hold that, "preference". In regard to the use of terms such as BBC or BWC for that matter, my point is that the objectification of people (Woman Trans etal) is just sooo out of step with the open mindedness we swingers should ne about. You can fuck who you like and i hope you enjoy. Really I do. But I also suspect you know why what you want is what you want and a lot of other people dont and need to examime thier reasons much more closely. | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ " Does the fact you don't meet men make you homophobic then? | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ Does the fact you don't meet men make you homophobic then? " Please leave common sense out of this thread | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ So its wrong to only want Black. My partner is Black. I have no desire to go with a white guy. I say in our profile. Do i not have the right to choose who i fuck. Its not racism it is preference and just that No one is saying you cant have a genuine Preference. I suppose from my prespective it is about people knowing why they hold that, "preference". In regard to the use of terms such as BBC or BWC for that matter, my point is that the objectification of people (Woman Trans etal) is just sooo out of step with the open mindedness we swingers should ne about. You can fuck who you like and i hope you enjoy. Really I do. But I also suspect you know why what you want is what you want and a lot of other people dont and need to examime thier reasons much more closely." What if I'm a hefty racist with Tommy Robinson on my fb friends list and an England flag tattooed on my shoulder. Then what? Should I be forced to fuck xyz colour/ race/ etc people? | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ So its wrong to only want Black. My partner is Black. I have no desire to go with a white guy. I say in our profile. Do i not have the right to choose who i fuck. Its not racism it is preference and just that No one is saying you cant have a genuine Preference. I suppose from my prespective it is about people knowing why they hold that, "preference". In regard to the use of terms such as BBC or BWC for that matter, my point is that the objectification of people (Woman Trans etal) is just sooo out of step with the open mindedness we swingers should ne about. You can fuck who you like and i hope you enjoy. Really I do. But I also suspect you know why what you want is what you want and a lot of other people dont and need to examime thier reasons much more closely. What if I'm a hefty racist with Tommy Robinson on my fb friends list and an England flag tattooed on my shoulder. Then what? Should I be forced to fuck xyz colour/ race/ etc people?" Definitely! I'd love to see them so conflicted... It feels so good, but Tommy says no! | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ So its wrong to only want Black. My partner is Black. I have no desire to go with a white guy. I say in our profile. Do i not have the right to choose who i fuck. Its not racism it is preference and just that No one is saying you cant have a genuine Preference. I suppose from my prespective it is about people knowing why they hold that, "preference". In regard to the use of terms such as BBC or BWC for that matter, my point is that the objectification of people (Woman Trans etal) is just sooo out of step with the open mindedness we swingers should ne about. You can fuck who you like and i hope you enjoy. Really I do. But I also suspect you know why what you want is what you want and a lot of other people dont and need to examime thier reasons much more closely. What if I'm a hefty racist with Tommy Robinson on my fb friends list and an England flag tattooed on my shoulder. Then what? Should I be forced to fuck xyz colour/ race/ etc people? Definitely! I'd love to see them so conflicted... It feels so good, but Tommy says no! " | |||
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"We will get to the point on here you must have sex with every ethnic group to prove you are not a racist and every sexual group to ensure you are not homophobic or genderphobic next. " It’s like people want to promote sexual socialism on Fab.... I think the problem is that many people are not getting enough sex from this site.... If everyone was arranging meets and having sex... they would not have time to ponder ...who is not sleeping with who or be offended by people’s sexual choices... | |||
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"We will get to the point on here you must have sex with every ethnic group to prove you are not a racist and every sexual group to ensure you are not homophobic or genderphobic next. " Yes, but you have to prove that their ethnicity or sexuality was not a turn on. | |||
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"Without meaning to cause offence to anyone, why are these threads always started by a concerned white guy? Because often they think that people will admire them for their empathy, personally I find it in bad taste, if some black men want to be referred to as bbc, it's got feck all to do with anyone else. " | |||
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"Anyone who thinks I've posted this thread to 'draw attention to my profile'. I mean c'mon! Seriously?! I posted because I find the language regressive and I think we, as a community, could and should do better! " I might be prejudiced but I just don’t find people getting upset on behalf of certain other groups all that convincing. I would rather hear directly from upset black men in this case. | |||
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"the only black men ive heard from so far are asking if i want some bbc. so they cant be that upset" Funny... About one of a dozen of the ones I hear from come up with this line, if at all. I wonder why. | |||
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"Any preference *could* be seen as some kind of stereotyping OP - whether it be for skin colour, body shape, sexuality or things like hair colour or any number of other preferences each and every one of us has to one extent or another. Are any of those preferences "-ists" or "-isms"? If the reason behind those preferences is not fuelled by lack of respect or worse (bigotry and hatred in some cases) then no not at all they're not. Choosing who you want to have sex with is a fundamental right, and if you've found that the best sex you have is with someone who is black and has a big cock, I personally don't see anything wrong with choosing to look for that. Quite often arguments like your own are rolled out on here by those who can't get meets, and so seek something to blame for not doing so, I'm not saying that is the case here but it happens where people looking for a specific thing are called out because it excludes someone else, kind of reverse "-ism" if you like." | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ " Yet there is an awful lot of black people (do we say people of colour in this enlightened age?) that will use the term BBC as their USP. are you here to tell them they are wrong ur just the women who like to fuck black men? When you say 'I and many others think you should do something about it', who are you talking to? | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ People of colour!? "People of colour" is a perfectly acceptable decriptor, famously and most recently championed by Michelle Obama and her husband " Doesn't make it right mate . I hate the term. If that's the case we are all people of colour | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ People of colour!? "People of colour" is a perfectly acceptable decriptor, famously and most recently championed by Michelle Obama and her husband Doesn't make it right mate . I hate the term. If that's the case we are all people of colour " Totally agree. I would hate to use the term for my man. | |||
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"We always treated fab as real life porn if I’m honest . So we met black guys when we were in the mood for that , and preferably black men with very large cocks , as visually it was fucking horny and my wife loved to put a show on for me . As did the black guys we met , who were invariably turned on by the scenario we had . Other times we would meet a white couple , an Asian , an Eastern European , a bi guy , a straight guy , a tv or a ts . And if anyone didn’t like the haven’t that we were meeting any of the people we met , we figured they must be jealous and never gave it another thought ." | |||
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"Caucasians turn red when we are embarrased, blue when cold, green with envy, yellow with cowardice, white when spooked and have to cheek to call others coloured..." | |||
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"...and yet the vast majority of black men that message me define themselves by the size of their cock and reference their colour or size in their profile name. They also attend parties entitled something like ‘donkey dick’ or ‘dark desires’. " Exactly!! | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ " Perhaps you should aim this thread at the black men. Because the only time I ever see it used is in the (at least 5 a week) messages entitled BBC for you or do you like BBC which I receive. | |||
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"Hi folks, I've been a site supporter since November, and already I've noticed that a lot of (what I would consider to be) racial stereotyping takes place on here. The obvious one being 'BBC only' for example. This is the language of the 1970's and in my opinion it should have no place on an inclusive site that aims to bring people of all ages and persuasions together. I've seen quite a few people of colour commenting that they don't like the term, and using it is out of step with the modern world. Have a look at this article for a black man's views on how such stereotyping can make people of colour feel: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/feb/27/white-privilege-is-used-by-women-against-black-men-as-a-tool-of-oppression? Fab brings like minded people of all ages and persuasions together in so many positive ways, but I am many others think it's about time you did something about it. Thanks, DJ Perhaps you should aim this thread at the black men. Because the only time I ever see it used is in the (at least 5 a week) messages entitled BBC for you or do you like BBC which I receive. " yep thats what you see on here, but if they say I have a bbc, nothing wrong with that, unless telling porkies and its small | |||
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"Must be a generational thing. I remember my wife using it in the early 00s but not heard her use it recently. " Duwjne Abbott isn't much of a fan of it | |||
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"Caucasians turn red when we are embarrased, blue when cold, green with envy, yellow with cowardice, white when spooked and have to cheek to call others coloured..." I remember someone posting leaflets with that on through letterboxes round Dagenham when I was a kid | |||
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"Must be a generational thing. I remember my wife using it in the early 00s but not heard her use it recently. Duwjne Abbott isn't much of a fan of it " Ah, OK. For clarification, my wife used to use the phrase 'person/people of colour', NOT 'coloured'. Try calling her coloured and see what happens...! | |||
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"...and yet the vast majority of black men that message me define themselves by the size of their cock and reference their colour or size in their profile name. They also attend parties entitled something like ‘donkey dick’ or ‘dark desires’. " | |||
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"So what do I say if im looking for a black man with a massive cock? Asking for a friend." I'm looking for a black man with a massive cock , hung black man , man with a BBC. Simple. | |||
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"So what do I say if im looking for a black man with a massive cock? Asking for a friend." Looking for a very well endowed black guy. Simple | |||
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"I have to say a lot of black men’s profiles thar I have seen have been based around being a BBC.....those people therefore appear to play on the ‘racial stereotyping’.... " In my view, you are not wrong but I think they are only playing to what's in demand! Using an example earlier, increase in veganism, results in more restaurants having a vegan section in the menu. | |||
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"I like sucking big black cocks, but I'd never go on a date with a black guy, is that bad? " I wouldn’t be too worried as I would hazard a guess that the black guys you enjoy sucking wouldn’t want a date with you either | |||
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"I like sucking big black cocks, but I'd never go on a date with a black guy, is that bad? I wouldn’t be too worried as I would hazard a guess that the black guys you enjoy sucking wouldn’t want a date with you either " | |||
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"I like sucking big black cocks, but I'd never go on a date with a black guy, is that bad? I wouldn’t be too worried as I would hazard a guess that the black guys you enjoy sucking wouldn’t want a date with you either " Too true, they're all straight after all..... | |||
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