FabSwingers.com forum: Deserve to be cheated on?

By *obblybits OP Couple
over a year ago

huddersfield

Talking on a website I am on (non-swingers) about cheating, most of em know we swing now and then.

The majority of them outright said I couldn't be angry or upset if martyn cheated????

Because I let him sleep with other women I should expect him to cheat on me, then it was well how can you call it cheating.

It made me mad and I knew I would only get sense of you lot.

I can damb right be absolutely furious if martyn cheated on me (he hasn't by the way)

Am I wrong because to me anything done in secret or behind mine or his back would be cheating?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lol Vanillas no idea have they??

If my partner saw anyone behind my back or me hers then we would both class that as cheating and a complete breakdown of trust in our relationship

Trust and emotional faithfulness are paramount to me xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You are absolutely spot on.

Cheating in my eyes is about deception. Swinging is about the total opposite, it's all about honesty!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If it is done behind your back and without your knowledge, it's cheating

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

"You are absolutely spot on.

Cheating in my eyes is about deception. Swinging is about the total opposite, it's all about honesty!

"
yes but people who are not into the scene wont see it like that

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By *obblybits OP Couple
over a year ago

huddersfield

Some also thing swinger must be un happy to sleepwith others to me you couldn't find happier people that most of you and the people we have met.

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By *ensual temptressWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

too bloody right you can !!!! cheating is desecption and dishonesty .swinging ,in my book requires honesty ,openess and communication ,all which are lacking in cheating. just my opinion

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By *anictechCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow - ish ;-)

"Talking on a website I am on (non-swingers) about cheating, most of em know we swing now and then.

The majority of them outright said I couldn't be angry or upset if martyn cheated????

Because I let him sleep with other women I should expect him to cheat on me, then it was well how can you call it cheating.

It made me mad and I knew I would only get sense of you lot.

I can damb right be absolutely furious if martyn cheated on me (he hasn't by the way)

Am I wrong because to me anything done in secret or behind mine or his back would be cheating?

Nope, u knew, so its not cheatingll

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By *atalie..Woman
over a year ago

Bolton

Part of the reason i started dogging/swinging 5 years back was so we wouldnt cheat on each other and wouldnt have a reason too. But funny enough i said to chrissy today if i had to do a lie detector test on cheating i would fail it cause in my mind even tho when we swing we are in the same room i feel like i have cheated on him

If your swingers and they know odd that they think you would cheat as you can have sex with anyone at anytime you like with eachothers permission

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By *lipperyWhenWet!Couple
over a year ago

Rochester

we understand exactly what you a talking about.

Trust is the issue, and betrayal of trust, not the sex, is what damages relationships.

Most swinging couples I know are very close.

Best you can do really with the vanilla's is tell then they are wrong just in case they listen and then ignore the rest of it, and get on having fun.

Good luck and remember most of them are just a bit jealous.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's just a case of them not understanding over on that site, don't be mad at them, lol

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By *andKCouple
over a year ago

Norfolk

"Lol Vanillas no idea have they??

If my partner saw anyone behind my back or me hers then we would both class that as cheating and a complete breakdown of trust in our relationship

Trust and emotional faithfulness are paramount to me xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's just a case of them not understanding over on that site, don't be mad at them, lol"

I agree that cheating is deception so swinging is not cheating....however before I joined the wonderful world of fab my views were different in a vanilla kind of way

so I am very glad my mind was opened

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People who dont swing just dont get it. I feel if a couple swing it shows, to me, their relationship is solid, and meeting others is simlpy an added bonus to a loving trusting relationship and there simply enjoying an already fantastic lovelife! .... fcuk what others think hunny, you know its not cheating and its only you and your man that matter xx

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By *obblybits OP Couple
over a year ago

huddersfield

Thank you, I knew I wasn't mad

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What everyone else said!

Seriously though, don't think about what others say because you know different and that's what matters!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Talking on a website I am on (non-swingers) about cheating, most of em know we swing now and then.

The majority of them outright said I couldn't be angry or upset if martyn cheated????

Because I let him sleep with other women I should expect him to cheat on me, then it was well how can you call it cheating.

It made me mad and I knew I would only get sense of you lot.

I can damb right be absolutely furious if martyn cheated on me (he hasn't by the way)

Am I wrong because to me anything done in secret or behind mine or his back would be cheating?

Its another viewpoint not dissimilar to people seeing an accident from different angles. From different viewpoints things look different to different people. Nobody is 100% wrong its more to do with how you view things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Talking on a website I am on (non-swingers) about cheating, most of em know we swing now and then.

The majority of them outright said I couldn't be angry or upset if martyn cheated????

Because I let him sleep with other women I should expect him to cheat on me, then it was well how can you call it cheating.

It made me mad and I knew I would only get sense of you lot.

I can damb right be absolutely furious if martyn cheated on me (he hasn't by the way)

Am I wrong because to me anything done in secret or behind mine or his back would be cheating?

Not sure I agree there, they just haven't understood the difference between the consensual and the non-consensual.

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By *emima_puddlefuckCouple
over a year ago

hexham

"Talking on a website I am on (non-swingers) about cheating, most of em know we swing now and then.

The majority of them outright said I couldn't be angry or upset if martyn cheated????

Because I let him sleep with other women I should expect him to cheat on me, then it was well how can you call it cheating.

It made me mad and I knew I would only get sense of you lot.

I can damb right be absolutely furious if martyn cheated on me (he hasn't by the way)

Am I wrong because to me anything done in secret or behind mine or his back would be cheating?

they are vanilla, this is a swinging site, honesty is the first rule for swinging couples/

in future i wouldnt try to explain swinging to nillas who have no interest. however if u have to ask about this maybe the two of u need to have a chat to reassure why you are here and your rules as they have clearly touched a nerve.

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By *weet threesome wifeCouple
over a year ago

somewhere out there

"too bloody right you can !!!! cheating is desecption and dishonesty .swinging ,in my book requires honesty ,openess and communication ,all which are lacking in cheating. just my opinion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have come across people who dont understand swinging and why we do it, we explain our reason some that know we swing are happy for us and some dont understand why. But its there choice. I agree with othersyou need 100% trust and 100% agree on dos and donts. I would sooner watch him cheat and enjoy it while doing it myself, if we did it without others knowledge then yeah its cheating, but the way we see it is we dont need to cheat when we can experience it together. I wouldnt worry what others think people that have never done it dont understand why we do it and until they do if they do they will always have that same opinion. Thats why we keep it to ourselves.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agree with what majority are saying here . You swing together and both know what is going on with who . When one is sneaking off and having their own un they are breaking that trust you have in each other , within the relationship . It's not just the sex it's the fact they felt they couldn't talk to you about whatever thier reasons are for having to do that . So i wouldn't expect your partner to be off cheating .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we have a slightly differnt viewpoint on this, because we have no interest in being a full swap couple, so we see having sex with another person, whether with permission or not, as cheating.

reading that back to myself it doesnt make sense, as any sexual contact is either cheating, or not, but tats just how we feel about it.

each ot their own i suppose, but in principal, the act of swinging, whether full or soft IS NOT cheating, per se.

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