FabSwingers.com forum: Coming out bi - reaction and experience

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi, I read a recent forum post about a guy coming out bi to his wife. Sounded like a vanilla relationship.

I have been in long term monogamous vanilla relationships and kept my bi side secret, i am generally straight but orally bi in mmf situations, so not difficult to keep it secret.

Just wondered what other fab users experiences have been about coming out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 08/01/19 12:44:47]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi, I read a recent forum post about a guy coming out bi to his wife. Sounded like a vanilla relationship.

I have been in long term monogamous vanilla relationships and kept my bi side secret, i am generally straight but orally bi in mmf situations, so not difficult to keep it secret.

Just wondered what other fab users experiences have been about coming out

It’s a struggle

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"Hi, I read a recent forum post about a guy coming out bi to his wife. Sounded like a vanilla relationship.

I have been in long term monogamous vanilla relationships and kept my bi side secret, i am generally straight but orally bi in mmf situations, so not difficult to keep it secret.

Just wondered what other fab users experiences have been about coming out

I'm the same as you bi wise. Never felt the need to 'come out' to anyone apart from being up front about it on here.

Fox and I met in here so it was never 'news' that I had to break to a partner.

I can see it being more difficult IRL of course.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I can imagine, easier and more socially acceptable for a woman in general to be bi

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hi, I read a recent forum post about a guy coming out bi to his wife. Sounded like a vanilla relationship.

I have been in long term monogamous vanilla relationships and kept my bi side secret, i am generally straight but orally bi in mmf situations, so not difficult to keep it secret.

Just wondered what other fab users experiences have been about coming out

I'm the same as you bi wise. Never felt the need to 'come out' to anyone apart from being up front about it on here.

Fox and I met in here so it was never 'news' that I had to break to a partner.

I can see it being more difficult IRL of course.

That's what i have thought, it would be easier to have a relationship on here, where your sexuality is up front and accepted.

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By *ilver_StarMan
over a year ago

Warwickshire

I'm divorced now (and before you ask... no, not because of my bi side! hahah) - but did discuss my desire too play with a cock with my wife.

Mostly this was discussed during sex or when we were both horny - So she knew I was open to wanking and sucking a man - but it simply didnt do anything for her, so I didn't pursue it.

A previous girlfriend LOVED the idea but we never got around to it.

That's all changing now...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you're not looking to meet men while you're with your partner I don't see a need to say anything.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm divorced now (and before you ask... no, not because of my bi side! hahah) - but did discuss my desire too play with a cock with my wife.

Mostly this was discussed during sex or when we were both horny - So she knew I was open to wanking and sucking a man - but it simply didnt do anything for her, so I didn't pursue it.

A previous girlfriend LOVED the idea but we never got around to it.

That's all changing now...

Glad to hear and thanks for sharing

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If you're not looking to meet men while you're with your partner I don't see a need to say anything.

Yep agree with you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

been bi since i was 16 and never had an issue

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"been bi since i was 16 and never had an issue "

That's good to hear, did it affect any relationships you have had and from your experience has being open about your sexuality helped?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Like you op, I’m open to say that I’m probably orally bi-curios (never been in the situation to do anything about it). Told my wife and that’s it, I didn’t think I was coming out to her though, I just look at it as a thing I’m curious about.

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By *iss.HoneyWoman
over a year ago

...

"Like you op, I’m open to say that I’m probably orally bi-curios (never been in the situation to do anything about it). Told my wife and that’s it, I didn’t think I was coming out to her though, I just look at it as a thing I’m curious about. "

Sucking or being sucked?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Good to hear it went well and was not something that freaked her out. Sounds like you have a great woman ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"been bi since i was 16 and never had an issue "

me too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Was at a club with ex. And met 2cpls. We went back to thetes for a party. And found out they were bi cpld. The two guys started sucking each other and my ex got so turned on she wanted me to join in with them. Well i was oraly bi. But she didnt know so there was no need to come out to her in the end. So from then on in. I was getting cock and pussy. Mmm. Lucky me eh ?. Lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My bisexuality is only known on here. I’ve been hinting at it for a while though without blurting it out in real life with those that I want to know when I feel the time is right.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"My bisexuality is only known on here. I’ve been hinting at it for a while though without blurting it out in real life with those that I want to know when I feel the time is right."

Openly bi on here. Straight in the vanilla world. ??

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

I was 'outed' rather than coming out.

I'm not sure that coming out though is a good thing, I kind of think that people are people and I would hope that (certainly with my kids) people will just accept sexuality as just being who that person finds attractive.

It's only because society expects people to be straight that coming out has become a thing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why the big deal...? Some women are 'bisexual' and it is widely accepted by both genders (more so with guys)...

I am not qualified to pass an opinion on a woman's preferences but some guys are so hypocritical and dismiss male bisexual tendencies as being perverted...

So what is swinging all about..? Surely it is about adventure and gaining experiences that is suitable for all persons involved...

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By *iliciousCouple
over a year ago

Sussex/Surrey

My wife was open and turned on by the idea when I told her. Still is. Does your wife play? That might be a start...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was always curious when I was with my ex-wife, when we spilt and I joined FabS I decided to try and found that in mmf situations I quite like it.

I told my GF very early in our relationship, we were lying in bed one Sunday morning discussing our previous sexual activity, she asked, and I just said yes before I knew it, it’s Not a problem to her, I actually think she was hoping for a yes.

We have discussed

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By *erriAnneTV/TS
over a year ago

The shire

I joined the military at 16 back in 90 and it was drummed into you gays are bad and bad for society. It was only when I left that I became curious of being bi and now look at me lol. I told me mum all about me and the crossdresser side of me the other week and she was amazing. Didn't bat an eyelid tbh. Was a big relief to actually tell someone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I only mention it when relevant. So on here it is but in real life less so. That said, it's not been an issue to anyone I've told... Yet...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I only mention it when relevant. So on here it is but in real life less so. That said, it's not been an issue to anyone I've told... Yet... "

Good to hear and i am much the same

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By *eddonistikMan
over a year ago

Manchester

Many years ago a girlfiend persuaded me to do bi stuff with my best mate when we had a threesome. Best thing ever, it took years to get more and more open about it.

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By *wing_Bi4FunCouple
over a year ago

Truro

I'm not "out" to anyone IRL other than my hubby of course and friends I've met through Fab.

I'd have no problem being open about it but when you're married people just assume you're straight / it just never comes up!

There's not really any need for my family to know. My hubby had a feeling I was bi(curious) the night he met me so never really needed to come out to him either!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi, I read a recent forum post about a guy coming out bi to his wife. Sounded like a vanilla relationship.

I have been in long term monogamous vanilla relationships and kept my bi side secret, i am generally straight but orally bi in mmf situations, so not difficult to keep it secret.

Just wondered what other fab users experiences have been about coming out

Mrs got turned on a lot

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi, I read a recent forum post about a guy coming out bi to his wife. Sounded like a vanilla relationship.

I have been in long term monogamous vanilla relationships and kept my bi side secret, i am generally straight but orally bi in mmf situations, so not difficult to keep it secret.

Just wondered what other fab users experiences have been about coming out

Mrs got turned on a lot "

I always tell my partners from the start. Both my husbands knew even though our relationships were vanilla. Id want to know if i was ever thinking about a serious relationship with a man.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi, I read a recent forum post about a guy coming out bi to his wife. Sounded like a vanilla relationship.

I have been in long term monogamous vanilla relationships and kept my bi side secret, i am generally straight but orally bi in mmf situations, so not difficult to keep it secret.

Just wondered what other fab users experiences have been about coming out

I choose to remain happily closeted as I've no strong desire to wear it like a high visibility best. I don't feel as if my sexuality is anyone elses business.

If I did choose to go public I suspect I'd start to feel very anxious about it.

My ex took it upon herself to tell my best friend and his wife, many of the parents in my children's classes. The shame I used to feel going to pick them up, the unessercarry conversation I had to have with my still best friend and my parents reaction to my sister's teenage prank about my sexuality. Other people's reactions to my sexuality are all factors that have effected my decision to choose to remain closeted.

If prejudice were less and people less cruel in their ignorance. I'd probably change my view, though I doubt it'd effect my happiness.

I admire those with the courage to come out, though I don't feel as if I need to follow them down tgat path.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Agree, happy to be open about my sexuality on fab, but not in the vanilla world, mainly because of the fear of what you have actually experienced. Thanks for sharing.

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By *heIcebreakersCouple
over a year ago

Cramlington

"Hi, I read a recent forum post about a guy coming out bi to his wife. Sounded like a vanilla relationship.

I have been in long term monogamous vanilla relationships and kept my bi side secret, i am generally straight but orally bi in mmf situations, so not difficult to keep it secret.

Just wondered what other fab users experiences have been about coming out

"
OK, remember, if you;re in a long term monogamous relationship and you come out as bi you need to accept that you;re also disclosing you have been, or might be, unfaithful. That' the deal breaker. If you haven't been, and won't be unfaithful, then you're potentially bi, and that's just a dinner party game of 'would you ever' - but if you're telling someone who thought you were monogamous that you like a bit of cock fun on the side, expect explosions, or at least think about the risk.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi, I read a recent forum post about a guy coming out bi to his wife. Sounded like a vanilla relationship.

I have been in long term monogamous vanilla relationships and kept my bi side secret, i am generally straight but orally bi in mmf situations, so not difficult to keep it secret.

Just wondered what other fab users experiences have been about coming out

OK, remember, if you;re in a long term monogamous relationship and you come out as bi you need to accept that you;re also disclosing you have been, or might be, unfaithful. That' the deal breaker. If you haven't been, and won't be unfaithful, then you're potentially bi, and that's just a dinner party game of 'would you ever' - but if you're telling someone who thought you were monogamous that you like a bit of cock fun on the side, expect explosions, or at least think about the risk.

This is very true and I'd urge all people never to cheat and to be more open with your partner if you are or suspect you maybe bisexual. You'd may be pleasantly surprised if you've not cheated.

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