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"Oh dear.....awkward!! You obviously think she would like more than just friendship. You need to tell her you're not interested. Did your mutual friends invite you both because they think you may become an item?" Yes they’re playing matchmaker and think we are perfect... I also told her I’m not interested in a relationship and very busy with my career... We never even kissed..... | |||
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In the long run it's going to be better than just ghosting her, I personally hate that whole practice - just have the balls to be honest and face the consequences. Otherwise it's taking the easy, and disrespectful way out.
She make taken it well, she may not. Ghosting from the sounds of it will be awkward due to the same social circle. If she can't handle the (polite) rejection then that's on her and you should not feel guilty for it. | |||
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"Now for the past week she has been asking me to hangout.. I have told her I’m very busy with work and won’t be available until I come back from London...." Here's the problem. When you tell someone you're not available until after a certain date, there's a good chance they're gonna assume you are available after that date. You just need to say words to the effect of "no thanks, I'm not really interested". It's not the easiest thing to say to somebody, but sometimes it's necessary. | |||
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"I’ve read on here that ghosting is pure cowardice... So please good people of Fab give me another option.... Met a girl through a mutual friend.. She works with my friends wife... We went on 2 dates , but I didn’t feel a spark... I’ve kept communication pleasant because we socialize in the same circles... Now for the past week she has been asking me to hangout.. I have told her I’m very busy with work and won’t be available until I come back from London.... I just got invited to dinner with my friends and surprise surprise, this woman is going to be there..... So what options do I have but to block her? Keep in mind no sex was involved nor talking about a relationship...." Tell her yr not interested.. honesty is the best way | |||
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"Ok she is attending dinner when your there. Be civil, be polite throughout the evening. Towards the end or at the end I would just say can I have a word a minute. Make it private, thank her for any interest shown in you and say gently that the attraction isn't mutual. It can be done gently and privately. No need for any embarrassment or others to hear. "  spot on | |||
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"This is the big problem...... I have communicated with her and my friends I’m not interested in a relationship.... " Tell her you're a Swinger and watch her run a mile. Other than that just put on your bigboy boots and tell her Straight. Ghosting is cowardly and you're more of a man than that in my eyes. | |||
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"This is the big problem...... I have communicated with her and my friends I’m not interested in a relationship.... " Why are your friends doing this then? | |||
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"This is the big problem...... I have communicated with her and my friends I’m not interested in a relationship.... " Is she maybe not just wanting to hang out as friends then? Entirely possible so long as you have been clear with her and she knows the deal. | |||
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"This is the big problem...... I have communicated with her and my friends I’m not interested in a relationship.... Tell her you're a Swinger and watch her run a mile. Other than that just put on your bigboy boots and tell her Straight. Ghosting is cowardly and you're more of a man than that in my eyes." You see I didn’t want to give away to much information but it looks like it has to be done.... The female in question is a nice person.. the only thing I didn’t like about her was the fact. I find her to be spoiled... at 28 her parents pay all her bills and she uses her money to take vacations and make sure she looks good... I’m a self made man and I like self made women... I’m nouveau riche and I want to date and marry nouveau riche... I have dated old money women in the past and we are never going to match.... After our last date... I explained this to her explicitly and I also told her I’m not emotionally available due to the fact I’m focusing on my career.... I explained to my match making friends this fact also. but their retort was she is a very kind and nice girl... I should give her a chance... she really likes you... Now I see everyone saying I should talk to her again... but why should I repeat myself? If in 2019 you can’t take a hint, why shouldn’t you be ghosted? I’m not a coward, if someone told me they are not interested in a relationship and I persisted on contacting them. I would be called a stalker... | |||
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"This is the big problem...... I have communicated with her and my friends I’m not interested in a relationship.... Tell her you're a Swinger and watch her run a mile. Other than that just put on your bigboy boots and tell her Straight. Ghosting is cowardly and you're more of a man than that in my eyes. You see I didn’t want to give away to much information but it looks like it has to be done.... The female in question is a nice person.. the only thing I didn’t like about her was the fact. I find her to be spoiled... at 28 her parents pay all her bills and she uses her money to take vacations and make sure she looks good... I’m a self made man and I like self made women... I’m nouveau riche and I want to date and marry nouveau riche... I have dated old money women in the past and we are never going to match.... After our last date... I explained this to her explicitly and I also told her I’m not emotionally available due to the fact I’m focusing on my career.... I explained to my match making friends this fact also. but their retort was she is a very kind and nice girl... I should give her a chance... she really likes you... Now I see everyone saying I should talk to her again... but why should I repeat myself? If in 2019 you can’t take a hint, why shouldn’t you be ghosted? I’m not a coward, if someone told me they are not interested in a relationship and I persisted on contacting them. I would be called a stalker... " She might be an easy bang though. People want what they can't have, you're too much of a catch you gotta play that shit down. Girls kind of get away with it because they're not used to being fired by men. | |||
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"This is the big problem...... I have communicated with her and my friends I’m not interested in a relationship.... Tell her you're a Swinger and watch her run a mile. Other than that just put on your bigboy boots and tell her Straight. Ghosting is cowardly and you're more of a man than that in my eyes. You see I didn’t want to give away to much information but it looks like it has to be done.... The female in question is a nice person.. the only thing I didn’t like about her was the fact. I find her to be spoiled... at 28 her parents pay all her bills and she uses her money to take vacations and make sure she looks good... I’m a self made man and I like self made women... I’m nouveau riche and I want to date and marry nouveau riche... I have dated old money women in the past and we are never going to match.... After our last date... I explained this to her explicitly and I also told her I’m not emotionally available due to the fact I’m focusing on my career.... I explained to my match making friends this fact also. but their retort was she is a very kind and nice girl... I should give her a chance... she really likes you... Now I see everyone saying I should talk to her again... but why should I repeat myself? If in 2019 you can’t take a hint, why shouldn’t you be ghosted? I’m not a coward, if someone told me they are not interested in a relationship and I persisted on contacting them. I would be called a stalker... " dated old money"who are you Henry the 8th tell go on anougher date and tell her you think she is a spoilt brat she will dump you problem solved | |||
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"Use a rented house to take them back to always use a burner phone never carry id always pay by cash and never let them take a picture then when you don't like them ghost them burn your clothes make your self disappear." This  | |||
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"This is the big problem...... I have communicated with her and my friends I’m not interested in a relationship.... Tell her you're a Swinger and watch her run a mile. Other than that just put on your bigboy boots and tell her Straight. Ghosting is cowardly and you're more of a man than that in my eyes. You see I didn’t want to give away to much information but it looks like it has to be done.... The female in question is a nice person.. the only thing I didn’t like about her was the fact. I find her to be spoiled... at 28 her parents pay all her bills and she uses her money to take vacations and make sure she looks good... I’m a self made man and I like self made women... I’m nouveau riche and I want to date and marry nouveau riche... I have dated old money women in the past and we are never going to match.... After our last date... I explained this to her explicitly and I also told her I’m not emotionally available due to the fact I’m focusing on my career.... I explained to my match making friends this fact also. but their retort was she is a very kind and nice girl... I should give her a chance... she really likes you... Now I see everyone saying I should talk to her again... but why should I repeat myself? If in 2019 you can’t take a hint, why shouldn’t you be ghosted? I’m not a coward, if someone told me they are not interested in a relationship and I persisted on contacting them. I would be called a stalker... " See now if you were a woman writing that everyone would tell you to cut all contact, don't respond to messages and would call the guy pushy. I believe the same should apply to you. You don't want anything to do with her, you've told her and the people who claim to be your friends this. In my opinion you have no option but to ignore all further contact from this lady and have a very serious conversation with your friends who seem to be encouraging this. | |||
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"This is the big problem...... I have communicated with her and my friends I’m not interested in a relationship.... Tell her you're a Swinger and watch her run a mile. Other than that just put on your bigboy boots and tell her Straight. Ghosting is cowardly and you're more of a man than that in my eyes. You see I didn’t want to give away to much information but it looks like it has to be done.... The female in question is a nice person.. the only thing I didn’t like about her was the fact. I find her to be spoiled... at 28 her parents pay all her bills and she uses her money to take vacations and make sure she looks good... I’m a self made man and I like self made women... I’m nouveau riche and I want to date and marry nouveau riche... I have dated old money women in the past and we are never going to match.... After our last date... I explained this to her explicitly and I also told her I’m not emotionally available due to the fact I’m focusing on my career.... I explained to my match making friends this fact also. but their retort was she is a very kind and nice girl... I should give her a chance... she really likes you... Now I see everyone saying I should talk to her again... but why should I repeat myself? If in 2019 you can’t take a hint, why shouldn’t you be ghosted? I’m not a coward, if someone told me they are not interested in a relationship and I persisted on contacting them. I would be called a stalker... She might be an easy bang though. People want what they can't have, you're too much of a catch you gotta play that shit down. Girls kind of get away with it because they're not used to being fired by men. " I would never have sex with her if I have no intention of being in a relationship... Then I become known as the selfish jerk that uses women for sex at all party’s and social events in the future..... | |||
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"This is the big problem...... I have communicated with her and my friends I’m not interested in a relationship.... Tell her you're a Swinger and watch her run a mile. Other than that just put on your bigboy boots and tell her Straight. Ghosting is cowardly and you're more of a man than that in my eyes. You see I didn’t want to give away to much information but it looks like it has to be done.... The female in question is a nice person.. the only thing I didn’t like about her was the fact. I find her to be spoiled... at 28 her parents pay all her bills and she uses her money to take vacations and make sure she looks good... I’m a self made man and I like self made women... I’m nouveau riche and I want to date and marry nouveau riche... I have dated old money women in the past and we are never going to match.... After our last date... I explained this to her explicitly and I also told her I’m not emotionally available due to the fact I’m focusing on my career.... I explained to my match making friends this fact also. but their retort was she is a very kind and nice girl... I should give her a chance... she really likes you... Now I see everyone saying I should talk to her again... but why should I repeat myself? If in 2019 you can’t take a hint, why shouldn’t you be ghosted? I’m not a coward, if someone told me they are not interested in a relationship and I persisted on contacting them. I would be called a stalker... dated old money"who are you Henry the 8th tell go on anougher date and tell her you think she is a spoilt brat she will dump you problem solved" So I should take her on a third date to insult her? Ok | |||
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"To late to get a date for dinner..... I just canceled on them... told them I’m coming down with the flu...." Believe me it’s the best option ! Get a date on dial for the next meet - good luck | |||
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"This is the big problem...... I have communicated with her and my friends I’m not interested in a relationship.... Tell her you're a Swinger and watch her run a mile. Other than that just put on your bigboy boots and tell her Straight. Ghosting is cowardly and you're more of a man than that in my eyes. You see I didn’t want to give away to much information but it looks like it has to be done.... The female in question is a nice person.. the only thing I didn’t like about her was the fact. I find her to be spoiled... at 28 her parents pay all her bills and she uses her money to take vacations and make sure she looks good... I’m a self made man and I like self made women... I’m nouveau riche and I want to date and marry nouveau riche... I have dated old money women in the past and we are never going to match.... After our last date... I explained this to her explicitly and I also told her I’m not emotionally available due to the fact I’m focusing on my career.... I explained to my match making friends this fact also. but their retort was she is a very kind and nice girl... I should give her a chance... she really likes you... Now I see everyone saying I should talk to her again... but why should I repeat myself? If in 2019 you can’t take a hint, why shouldn’t you be ghosted? I’m not a coward, if someone told me they are not interested in a relationship and I persisted on contacting them. I would be called a stalker... " Tell them all again politely that you're not interested in her. No spark etc. If they persist with ignoring your wishes they are very disrespectful and then I'd agree with MrsNice- cut contact with all of them. They're not your friends if they make you feel uncomfortable. | |||
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"Professionals time is precious, I'm sure she would prefer an honest direct but tactful approach. Ghosting is very much like Snapchat filters, both belong to the teenage population " So does setting your friends up with people they aren't interested in | |||
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"Professionals time is precious, I'm sure she would prefer an honest direct but tactful approach. Ghosting is very much like Snapchat filters, both belong to the teenage population So does setting your friends up with people they aren't interested in" Setting up dates isn't a waste. Just one of those things isn't it that he felt no spark. It's how he deals with it now | |||
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"Professionals time is precious, I'm sure she would prefer an honest direct but tactful approach. Ghosting is very much like Snapchat filters, both belong to the teenage population So does setting your friends up with people they aren't interested in Setting up dates isn't a waste. Just one of those things isn't it that he felt no spark. It's how he deals with it now " He's explained to the woman and his friends that he's not interested, he's explained why he's not interested. Yet they persist. To me that's a waste and inconsiderate. As I said above if the situation was reversed and a woman's friends were setting her up with a guy she had explained she wasn't interested in people would be calling it wrong | |||
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"This is the big problem...... I have communicated with her and my friends I’m not interested in a relationship.... Tell her you're a Swinger and watch her run a mile. Other than that just put on your bigboy boots and tell her Straight. Ghosting is cowardly and you're more of a man than that in my eyes. You see I didn’t want to give away to much information but it looks like it has to be done.... The female in question is a nice person.. the only thing I didn’t like about her was the fact. I find her to be spoiled... at 28 her parents pay all her bills and she uses her money to take vacations and make sure she looks good... I’m a self made man and I like self made women... I’m nouveau riche and I want to date and marry nouveau riche... I have dated old money women in the past and we are never going to match.... After our last date... I explained this to her explicitly and I also told her I’m not emotionally available due to the fact I’m focusing on my career.... I explained to my match making friends this fact also. but their retort was she is a very kind and nice girl... I should give her a chance... she really likes you... Now I see everyone saying I should talk to her again... but why should I repeat myself? If in 2019 you can’t take a hint, why shouldn’t you be ghosted? I’m not a coward, if someone told me they are not interested in a relationship and I persisted on contacting them. I would be called a stalker... She might be an easy bang though. People want what they can't have, you're too much of a catch you gotta play that shit down. Girls kind of get away with it because they're not used to being fired by men. I would never have sex with her if I have no intention of being in a relationship... Then I become known as the selfish jerk that uses women for sex at all party’s and social events in the future....." I get ya, that's a reason why I'm on here really. No point in doing all the dates etc when you only want to have sex and they get hurt. Women like a challenge though so that might lead to more sex. | |||
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"Professionals time is precious, I'm sure she would prefer an honest direct but tactful approach. Ghosting is very much like Snapchat filters, both belong to the teenage population So does setting your friends up with people they aren't interested in Setting up dates isn't a waste. Just one of those things isn't it that he felt no spark. It's how he deals with it now He's explained to the woman and his friends that he's not interested, he's explained why he's not interested. Yet they persist. To me that's a waste and inconsiderate. As I said above if the situation was reversed and a woman's friends were setting her up with a guy she had explained she wasn't interested in people would be calling it wrong" I've not read all the thread just the OP opening comment (hot guys too talk to I'm bound to miss things!). Indeed if he has expressed lack of interest already then job done. If they are persisting then I would consider if they are really my friends | |||
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"I’ve read on here that ghosting is pure cowardice... So please good people of Fab give me another option.... Met a girl through a mutual friend.. She works with my friends wife... We went on 2 dates , but I didn’t feel a spark... I’ve kept communication pleasant because we socialize in the same circles... Now for the past week she has been asking me to hangout.. I have told her I’m very busy with work and won’t be available until I come back from London.... I just got invited to dinner with my friends and surprise surprise, this woman is going to be there..... So what options do I have but to block her? Keep in mind no sex was involved nor talking about a relationship...." To her..."Hi, you're nice but I'm not feeling it." To your Friends..."fuck off with the matchmaking I'm not into your taste for me" Life is WAY too short to fib,lie or hide feelings. Honesty is simpler. | |||
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"I’ve read on here that ghosting is pure cowardice... So please good people of Fab give me another option.... Met a girl through a mutual friend.. She works with my friends wife... We went on 2 dates , but I didn’t feel a spark... I’ve kept communication pleasant because we socialize in the same circles... Now for the past week she has been asking me to hangout.. I have told her I’m very busy with work and won’t be available until I come back from London.... I just got invited to dinner with my friends and surprise surprise, this woman is going to be there..... So what options do I have but to block her? Keep in mind no sex was involved nor talking about a relationship.... To her..."Hi, you're nice but I'm not feeling it." To your Friends..."fuck off with the matchmaking I'm not into your taste for me" Life is WAY too short to fib,lie or hide feelings. Honesty is simpler." Beautifully put, say this | |||
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"This is the big problem...... I have communicated with her and my friends I’m not interested in a relationship.... " Then, go to the meal and talk to her as if she is nothing but a friend. She, and your friends, know you're not interested in her so they won't be surprised if you are indifferent to her. If she gets flirty with you, ignore it or tell her, in front of your friends, you aren't interested. | |||
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"To late to get a date for dinner..... I just canceled on them... told them I’m coming down with the flu...." The trick is not to lie your way out of the situation. If you tell them the real reason you’ve cancelled (ie, I’m not interested in her or in your matchmaking) they should get the message! Otherwise they’ll reschedule for when your over the ‘flu! Alternatively, give them a story that’ll make it clear you’re not interested - like you can’t come, you have a date ... with twins
The other option is to go, treat it like dinner with a group of mates, don’t flirt, talk about football, the hot girl at the gym, cars etc. Even ask their advice on a dating issue (is it ok to ask out a girl who used to date your boss etc) ... that way, it makes it very plain that you see her as a platonic relationship & nothing more.
If it’s a group of friends & not just 4 of you, then you could go, chat to other people & leaveearly without really interacting with her.
You’ve told them you’re not interested in her, so none of that is inappropriate | |||
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"Don't get why people need an instant spark with someone they don't even know?" It’s not so much about a spark... it’s about things that are deal breakers in a relationship... I have dated spoiled rich women in the past and it’s something I won’t ever do again... So For instance if a person chooses not to date someone with children..... How can they form a spark with a single parent? | |||
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"To late to get a date for dinner..... I just canceled on them... told them I’m coming down with the flu...." From what I’ve read it seems that you’ve been straight with her and your friends already. They are the ones trying to force it along. Ghosting means disappearing and leaving someone wondering. You’d not actually be doing that as you have said your reasons. The question now is how do you feel about potentially not seeing your friends anymore? If they insist on pushing you together with people you’re not keen on are they really friends? | |||
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"To late to get a date for dinner..... I just canceled on them... told them I’m coming down with the flu.... From what I’ve read it seems that you’ve been straight with her and your friends already. They are the ones trying to force it along. Ghosting means disappearing and leaving someone wondering. You’d not actually be doing that as you have said your reasons. The question now is how do you feel about potentially not seeing your friends anymore? If they insist on pushing you together with people you’re not keen on are they really friends?" I really don’t think it will get to the extreme of not seeing them again.... When I spoke to the male half it’s more a case of the female nagging his wife to set us up... So once she gets the hint and stops nagging her... We should be good to go for summer party’s... | |||
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"I don't understand this spark thing and why people have to go out to dinner to check for a spark, my experience is mainly swinging clubs, if I talk to a lady and I don't feel a hard on while talking to her and looking in her eyes in a swingers club environment, I don't bother, I don't think I need dinner to check that. If I have a social, it is mainly the same thing." This is totally vanilla life...... this has nothing to do with swinging.... I date in real life.... I don’t date in the swinging world.... | |||
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