FabSwingers.com forum: None answered messages

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

None replied polite messages

Rude and just run of the mill ???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"None replied polite messages

Rude and just run of the mill ???"

Run of the mill

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By *oneyBear100Couple
over a year ago

Gatwick area

"None replied polite messages

Rude and just run of the mill ???"

Run of the mill, just delete all your sent items and be nicely surprised when someone you like replies

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just remember nobodies due you a reply

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By *allSteveMan
over a year ago

Poole

"None replied polite messages

Rude and just run of the mill ???"

Women on here get hundreds of messages per day. Don't take it personally. It's a woman's world on here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Quoted from the Site FAQs:

There are too many rude people on here who don't reply to my messages!

It's not rude not to reply.

Some ladies and couples get hundreds of messages a day so it simply isn't possible for them to reply to everyone. If you don't get a response, you should assume they aren't interested. If you're getting a lot of "no-replies" then you should consider your profile and the messages you send. Are they giving the right message? Are you standing out from the thousands of other guys on here?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"None replied polite messages

Rude and just run of the mill ???"

Why would it be rude?

Did they ask you to message them?

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Run of the mill.

Polite should be a bare minimum. It's not, unfortunately, but it should be.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Agreed

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By *inkycreamCouple
over a year ago

manchester

No effort no reply, copy and paste delete pushy rude delete. I’m sure most people who don’t get a reply haven’t tried.

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

"No effort no reply, copy and paste delete pushy rude delete. I’m sure most people who don’t get a reply haven’t tried. "

That's not the case, if you don't get a reply then it means you're not what the recipient is looking for. You can be sending the best messages but if you're not what they're looking for, then it will still be a no.

It's about matching as much as anything else, then looking at the approach

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By *inkycreamCouple
over a year ago

manchester

"No effort no reply, copy and paste delete pushy rude delete. I’m sure most people who don’t get a reply haven’t tried.

It's about matching as much as anything else, then looking at the approach"

Well it’s the case with us and I’m sure many others even if it’s no joy.

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By *xMFM3sumsxxWoman
over a year ago

SouthWest Lancashire

Men are not always polite when trying to get sex but even if they are it doesn't mean anything, nobodyof any gender has to reply to anyone if they don't want to.

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By *inkycreamCouple
over a year ago

manchester

"Men are not always polite when trying to get sex but even if they are it doesn't mean anything, nobodyof any gender has to reply to anyone if they don't want to."

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By *mmacdheelsTV/TS
over a year ago

France, Not in

"None replied polite messages

Rude and just run of the mill ???"

Run of the mill. Just have to keep on plugging away and not worry about it. Better no reply than being stud up on a date by a time waster.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Men are not always polite when trying to get sex but even if they are it doesn't mean anything, nobodyof any gender has to reply to anyone if they don't want to."

Oh quite. But for me it's a bare minimum like wiping your arse after you go to the toilet. Or the line I see on here way too often "I know what soap is". Congratulations, you might be a functional adult. That doesn't mean I'm going to fuck you.

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By *ud and BryanCouple
over a year ago

Boston, Lincolnshire

We get several messages every day, many of them literally just, "hi."

We usually reply - though not with a response the guy was expecting or hoping for - but when we don't, it's because we consider it better than sending a stock reply.

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By *ud and BryanCouple
over a year ago

Boston, Lincolnshire

"None replied polite messages

Rude and just run of the mill ???"

Perhaps you should compare a random, unsolicited message to a phone call about PPI, when you know that's why they're calling so you don't answer the phone.

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By *carletcoupleCouple
over a year ago

manchester

We get dozens from exactly the type of people we are not looking for. The very first line of our profile is pretty explanatory so if the messenger can't be bothered to read just one line then we generally wouldn't be bothered to send a reply. We did try at first but it becomes never ending and often with the same messenger over and over with the same half a line message.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

On the very rare occasion I answer the polite but effort free messages I get, I end up beating my head against the wall. No I'm not going to meet now, no, you can't have my number (I don't want no scrubs), no, I'm not giving you my Kik (etc). I'm sorry you just want a shag, I just want a conversation first.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Run of the mill

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"Quoted from the Site FAQs:

There are too many rude people on here who don't reply to my messages!

It's not rude not to reply.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Men are not always polite when trying to get sex but even if they are it doesn't mean anything, nobodyof any gender has to reply to anyone if they don't want to."

Is it normal that i seem to enjoy the forums as much as anything else on this site,

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By *inkycreamCouple
over a year ago

manchester

It maybe a sex site but if you take a sex approach, your doomed, just like the green cross code

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By *inkynudeMan
over a year ago

London

"Men are not always polite when trying to get sex but even if they are it doesn't mean anything, nobodyof any gender has to reply to anyone if they don't want to.

Is it normal that i seem to enjoy the forums as much as anything else on this site,"

I’m mostly here for the forum nowadays. Always entertaining :D

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By *ain n MableWoman
over a year ago

Milton Keynes

"None replied polite messages

Rude and just run of the mill ???"

Do you reply to all the spam in your Junk mail? I think not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When couples and females have over 100messages per day expect it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The messages we sometimes get are rediculous. We only reply if we’re interested. A lot of no thanks replies have got us abuse.

It may appear big headed/rude but to be honest we don’t have to reply so if we don’t want to we won’t.

We don’t mean to offend, but flip the coin.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"The messages we sometimes get are rediculous. We only reply if we’re interested. A lot of no thanks replies have got us abuse.

It may appear big headed/rude but to be honest we don’t have to reply so if we don’t want to we won’t.

We don’t mean to offend, but flip the coin."

Yeah. I'd rather be nice, but often it bites me, so I just suit myself.

One of the first people I met here told me that it's in everyone's interests to keep the ladies (including in couples) happy. I thought he was buttering me up, but he's right. If I had to answer all the inane messages I got, I'd strongly consider leaving Fab. I suspect many would. If my (in my case reasonable) word wasn't law about how I want to play in clubs, I wouldn't return (my word amounts to, respect me, basically). I know I'm not all that, but there are less women than men, and we're more highly sought after. Swinging just doesn't work for most people without both men and women.

So, I do what I like. It's better for those who do make the effort.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"None replied polite messages

Rude and just run of the mill ???"

Not rude at all. Not rude in any way.

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Just wait til you get the thrill of the yellow box

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If the sender hasn’t bothered to read our profile (or has read it and decided to ignore it) then I don’t see the point in replying to be honest.

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By *rmrseptemberCouple
over a year ago

Tonbridge

I agree with the above post. We have bothered to post an honest description of what we are looking for and our preferences. We mostly reply to polite messages even if they are not what we seek. But simple one liners such as ‘how’s you?’ And fancy ‘ meeting tonight ‘ are largely ignored.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

If the sender hasn’t bothered to read our profile (or has read it and decided to ignore it) then I don’t see the point in replying to be honest. "

Yes we do that. We try and answer most messages, it's not difficult for us we don't get many, however if it's impolite not to reply its surely equally impolite to send one word messages or messages just addressed to me the female half.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sending a message that ignores what people say in their profile is itself rude.

For example, we say ‘full swap meets’ in the headline of our profile. Lower down we say ‘no social meets, no soft swap meets.’ Yet we receive invites for these several times a week.

When people haven't even read the headline of your profile, no reply at all is probably politer than explaining how they have been stupid.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not rude, just their way of saying they are not interested. Would you reply to all your junk mail you get in your email? It's pretty similar really.

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"Agreed "

Ah yes. One of those threads.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is an inbox full of written rejection going to make you feel any better?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"None replied polite messages

Rude and just run of the mill ???"

No, just offends people who don't find out how things work before bombarding with messages.

And polite doesn't make you, sexually attractive.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"None replied polite messages

Rude and just run of the mill ???"

Refer to site FAQ's on the subject.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sending a message that ignores what people say in their profile is itself rude.

For example, we say ‘full swap meets’ in the headline of our profile. Lower down we say ‘no social meets, no soft swap meets.’ Yet we receive invites for these several times a week.

When people haven't even read the headline of your profile, no reply at all is probably politer than explaining how they have been stupid."

Exactly this! Its obvious when someone hasn't even bothered to read your profile, and when you're getting 50-100 a day you can see why those messages are ignored. Plus, once we reply it's then a relentless message after message and sometimes abuse, when all you were saying was 'No thanks'

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Sending a message that ignores what people say in their profile is itself rude.

For example, we say ‘full swap meets’ in the headline of our profile. Lower down we say ‘no social meets, no soft swap meets.’ Yet we receive invites for these several times a week.

When people haven't even read the headline of your profile, no reply at all is probably politer than explaining how they have been stupid.

Or when they only read the headline and twist it horribly.

My old one was "the brain is the greatest erogenous zone", and I changed it because I got way too many messages from guys saying that their "brain" was rock hard because of me.

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Not rude

Many go unanswered because they haven't read my profile or have nothing of interest on theirs...

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By *ll3somefunCouple
over a year ago

ipswich

we used to always reply to messages even if to say no thanks but unfortunately many on here don't bother to read our profile so we get meaningless messages from people who obviously don't fit what were looking for. if we get one of these now we just delete it

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