FabSwingers.com forum: Rudeness on here

By *arnished Halo OP Man
over a year ago

Oldbury

It's very rare that I feel the urge to approach people on here so my interactions are minimal. Quality over quantity I say.

One thing that bugs me is how rude or dismissive people can be when you do take time to answer people.

I don't have a problem with being told no thanks, you're not for me because of my situation or my pics don't float a boat. We all have our likes and tick lists. But ignoring and deleting posts without a reply is just plain rude. Have the decency to reply once you have started a conversation for goodness sake!

Rant over. Back to my quiet corner

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By *orthyorkypairCouple
over a year ago

North Yorkshire

unfortunately not every one takes a polite thanks but no thanks, so often people simply delete or delete and block to prevent the situation turning nasty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you mean you mailed them. They said no thank you. You mailed again and they didn't reply ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's very rare that I feel the urge to approach people on here so my interactions are minimal. Quality over quantity I say.

One thing that bugs me is how rude or dismissive people can be when you do take time to answer people.

Rant over. Back to my quiet corner

Amen to that brother!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not everyone takes rejection as well, resulting in volumes of vile abuse being sent back. It's simply quieter to ignore and block.

No amount of ranting about it will change the behaviour. You're better off just emptying your sent box, and being pleasantly surprised when a reply comes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Try the FAQ's.

No one owes anyone anything on here.

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By *limaxinnylonCouple
over a year ago

CHESTER

My pet hate is receiving message then receiving another 10-15 mins later if you haven't replied calling you time wasters or not interested then?!

FFS I have a life outside fab, I can't answer straight away, Jon and I need to discuss etc etc.

Patience is a virtue!

My rant over!

Jayne xx

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By *ifty69Man
over a year ago

north tyneside

Cost nothing to be polite and reply ,

!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cost nothing to be polite and reply ,

!!!!

"
Except time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What about people that get a huge amount of messages?

Are they supposed to reply to each one with a no thanks?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My take is that if you have the time to read then take a few mins to reply, how long does "no thanks" take?

If youre that rushed, leave reading mail till you have a bit of time, simple...

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"My take is that if you have the time to read then take a few mins to reply, how long does "no thanks" take?

If youre that rushed, leave reading mail till you have a bit of time, simple...

When you've got a few hundred unread messages in your inbox, it takes quite a while.

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By *ennythelionMan
over a year ago

Derby

"What about people that get a huge amount of messages?

Are they supposed to reply to each one with a no thanks?"
yes! Popularity can be a cross to bear!

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London

"My take is that if you have the time to read then take a few mins to reply, how long does "no thanks" take?

If youre that rushed, leave reading mail till you have a bit of time, simple...

We delete if not interested. What difference does sending a "no thanks" message make?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My take is that if you have the time to read then take a few mins to reply, how long does "no thanks" take?

If youre that rushed, leave reading mail till you have a bit of time, simple...

If you had to reply to 300 messages...

That is read the message,.read the profile, check out any pics, check location etc. It isn't as simple as "no thanks"

Then answering the reply "oh but your profile says"

Once people accept they are not ENTITLED to a reply, they enjoy fab more.

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By *arnished Halo OP Man
over a year ago

Oldbury

"Do you mean you mailed them. They said no thank you. You mailed again and they didn't reply ?"

It's more when I get approached and I reply for it to then get ignored. Happened twice today.

I understand not getting a reply when I send the 1st contact as I appreciate some people get 100s of emails.

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By *arnished Halo OP Man
over a year ago

Oldbury

"My take is that if you have the time to read then take a few mins to reply, how long does "no thanks" take?

If youre that rushed, leave reading mail till you have a bit of time, simple...

If you had to reply to 300 messages...

That is read the message,.read the profile, check out any pics, check location etc. It isn't as simple as "no thanks"

Then answering the reply "oh but your profile says"

Once people accept they are not ENTITLED to a reply, they enjoy fab more."

I am talking about when people approach you first. I understand not getting responses to my initial emails.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Theres no justification for ignorance, plain and simple.....

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"Do you mean you mailed them. They said no thank you. You mailed again and they didn't reply ?

It's more when I get approached and I reply for it to then get ignored. Happened twice today.

I understand not getting a reply when I send the 1st contact as I appreciate some people get 100s of emails."

I understand it must be frustrating but thems the breaks.

Just accept no reply= not interested and move on.

Good luck

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By *ackDanielsWhiteRabbitMan
over a year ago

Halifax

Whether you think its rude or impolite to not reply or the message is deleted, it is quite clearly stated in the FAQ'S it means no thanks. I rarely get messages on here except from friends but we get quite a lot on our couples one. The majority of women and couples will click on the profile before reading the message. If they dont like the profile its just easier to delete the message.

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By *ilth500Man
over a year ago

Merseyside

"Do you mean you mailed them. They said no thank you. You mailed again and they didn't reply ?

It's more when I get approached and I reply for it to then get ignored. Happened twice today.

I understand not getting a reply when I send the 1st contact as I appreciate some people get 100s of emails.

I understand it must be frustrating but thems the breaks.

Just accept no reply= not interested and move on.

Good luck "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Whether you think its rude or impolite to not reply or the message is deleted, it is quite clearly stated in the FAQ'S it means no thanks. I rarely get messages on here except from friends but we get quite a lot on our couples one. The majority of women and couples will click on the profile before reading the message. If they dont like the profile its just easier to delete the message. "

The FAQ`s where obviously written by a cpl then

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By *ackDanielsWhiteRabbitMan
over a year ago

Halifax

The FAQ`s where obviously written by a cpl then

And ignored by the majority of people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Must be tough but we do all suffer it, even as couples. We appreciate the effort people put into messages (Not the 3 worders of cut and paste jobs) and do try to reply and be civil. Sometimes we lose track of conversations though when life gets in the way and when we come back we miss where we left off we can appear disrespectful. We never intend to be though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Must be tough but we do all suffer it, even as couples. We appreciate the effort people put into messages (Not the 3 worders of cut and paste jobs) and do try to reply and be civil. Sometimes we lose track of conversations though when life gets in the way and when we come back we miss where we left off we can appear disrespectful. We never intend to be though."

How refreshing, on behalf of all the ignored, i thank you!

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By *erkshireBiCoupleCouple
over a year ago

Reading

I love these threads.

Makes it easy to delete messages

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

"It's very rare that I feel the urge to approach people on here so my interactions are minimal. Quality over quantity I say.

One thing that bugs me is how rude or dismissive people can be when you do take time to answer people.

Rant over. Back to my quiet corner

OP..do you reply to everh piece of junk mail that gets posted through your letterbox? No?..I thought not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My take is that if you have the time to read then take a few mins to reply, how long does "no thanks" take?

If youre that rushed, leave reading mail till you have a bit of time, simple...

People will run there profile how they see fit. If having a quick read and not replying works it's up to them.

As a couple we will read messages but if we're not together we won't necessarily reply until we can discuss together

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By *ensualgent38Man
over a year ago

London & Edinburgh

May the rude ones go to hell.

The world of Fab is about fun, filth, friendships and, always, RESPECT!

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

"Cost nothing to be polite and reply ,

!!!!

Costs a lot of time, especially for the single ladies who are inundated on a daily basis

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

Perhaps it's because they don't want to take the conversation any further?

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By *arnished Halo OP Man
over a year ago

Oldbury

As I mentioned earlier, I am not talking about me approaching people. I am talking about people who have approached me first.

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

"As I mentioned earlier, I am not talking about me approaching people. I am talking about people who have approached me first. "

Maybe they very quickly decided that you were not for them.

You are not entitled to a reply...

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

"As I mentioned earlier, I am not talking about me approaching people. I am talking about people who have approached me first. "

Then I think I would expect a reply back, if they started a conversation, assuming I hadn't said anything to offend

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By *urryfannyfuntimeWoman
over a year ago

East Devon

"May the rude ones go to hell.

The world of Fab is about fun, filth, friendships and, always, RESPECT!"

Then you'd best rethink your post as that first sentence is rather rude too!

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By *eal_curves_is_backWoman
over a year ago

London

Does anyone actually keep track of the messages they send? They must really lead a sheltered life.

If you get no reply, it means they are not interested. They have saved your and their time.

What the word "ignorant" means in the context of not replying to messages, evades me altogether.

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By *arnished Halo OP Man
over a year ago

Oldbury

Not entitled no, I just find it rude if I have taken the time to reply to someone approaching me. Comes across as someone just having a scattergun approach to fabbing which isn't my way.

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By *inful xWoman
over a year ago

In a sleepy little village

"As I mentioned earlier, I am not talking about me approaching people. I am talking about people who have approached me first. "

Its a frequent occurrence. Delete the conversation and move on

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By *arnished Halo OP Man
over a year ago

Oldbury

I do...the rare times it happens.

It was only a mild rant. It's no biggie

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Does anyone actually keep track of the messages they send? They must really lead a sheltered life.

If you get no reply, it means they are not interested. They have saved your and their time.

What the word "ignorant" means in the context of not replying to messages, evades me altogether."

Thats so easy for a fem who is swamped with mail to say lol

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By *inful xWoman
over a year ago

In a sleepy little village

"I do...the rare times it happens.

It was only a mild rant. It's no biggie

Make a note on their profile and when they message you again in 3mths time ( often happens ) you can remind them of how rude they were the first time

then block them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I do...the rare times it happens.

It was only a mild rant. It's no biggie

You cant back down now, youve taken the lid off pmsl!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've also had abuse from single females if I'm not interested in them. When I get a refusal after a messages I put a little note on their account not to bother them again and move on.This saves me pestering them again. We can't all like and be attracted to the same things and people..

Life would be boring if we did..

Take it on the chin us single males are 10 a penny on here xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I try to respond with a polite answer but this last week since refreshing my profile, I’ve been inundated and couldn’t keep up. How am I supposed to answer to ‘how are you doing?’ Without getting into a pointless conversation or coming across short. I usually say that I’m ‘politely declining’ but can’t use that for every message. It’s the ‘can I ask you a question?’ that gets a delete now as it’s usually to ask me a very pervy question.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's very rare that I feel the urge to approach people on here so my interactions are minimal. Quality over quantity I say.

One thing that bugs me is how rude or dismissive people can be when you do take time to answer people.

Rant over. Back to my quiet corner

It’s not Thursday yet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not everyone takes rejection as well, resulting in volumes of vile abuse being sent back. It's simply quieter to ignore and block.

No amount of ranting about it will change the behaviour. You're better off just emptying your sent box, and being pleasantly surprised when a reply comes. "

Agreed clear out the sent messages. And just cross your fingers. Good things happen to those who wait!

P.A.Y.P.R (patiently awaiting your polite reply)

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By *arnished Halo OP Man
over a year ago

Oldbury

"I try to respond with a polite answer but this last week since refreshing my profile, I’ve been inundated and couldn’t keep up. How am I supposed to answer to ‘how are you doing?’ Without getting into a pointless conversation or coming across short. I usually say that I’m ‘politely declining’ but can’t use that for every message. It’s the ‘can I ask you a question?’ that gets a delete now as it’s usually to ask me a very pervy question. "

Not so much your unsolicited emails. I could see that would need a PA! But how about where you have approached someone and they take time to reply. Would you always look to respond?

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By *arnished Halo OP Man
over a year ago

Oldbury

"I do...the rare times it happens.

It was only a mild rant. It's no biggie

Make a note on their profile and when they message you again in 3mths time ( often happens ) you can remind them of how rude they were the first time

then block them "

I get so few i remember who has approached me

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By *ensualgent38Man
over a year ago

London & Edinburgh

"May the rude ones go to hell.

The world of Fab is about fun, filth, friendships and, always, RESPECT!

Then you'd best rethink your post as that first sentence is rather rude too!

I’m as nice as nice can be, I can assure you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dont get me wrong, i realise theres a big majority of desperate chancers on here who pester fems n cpls with the same old one liners who deserve ignoring and blocking but to the few genuine guys that do try, give us a break ffs!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not so much your unsolicited emails. I could see that would need a PA! But how about where you have approached someone and they take time to reply. Would you always look to respond?"

I’ve looked back and I have quite I few I was meaning to go back to and respond. They were well written ones and I needed time to get back but I’ve left it too long and tbh, the answer will still be no. Some can get lost. If I’m really interested, I will get back straight away. If I take time then I’m not that bothered if I’m being honest.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honesty....... in here..... surely not!

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By *ames1763Man
over a year ago

Aberdeen

No I don't agree you should ignore people if you are able to respond but the guys should not bother about rude people, you probably won't talk to them if you saw them face to face so move on to better ladies

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Honesty....... in here..... surely not!

I like to be honest, if others don’t then that’s nothing to do with me.

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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

"I've also had abuse from single females if I'm not interested in them. When I get a refusal after a messages I put a little note on their account not to bother them again and move on.This saves me pestering them again. We can't all like and be attracted to the same things and people..

Life would be boring if we did..

Take it on the chin us single males are 10 a penny on here xx

There maybe a larger number of guys than other genders or demographics, as you've said and I say it often...we all have the same choices yes please or no thanks.

Nothing to say op the other person has lost your message in the new mail received and might get back to you later ...if that happens you can then choose what you'd like to do.

In the meantime..search out someone who interests you and message them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends on the day.If we only get a few messages then we try to answer them all.

Sometimes we get over a hundred and when you are having a conversation with somebody there simply isnt time to,answer them all.

Also when you read a message and it says some thing like I want your husband to watch me fuck your ass,it sort of puts you on the back foot

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By *exy tiggerWoman
over a year ago

portsmouth

To be honest as a single female i get about 60-70 messages a day. To reply to all of them id need a secretary. There just isnt enough hours in the day to reply to them all. If i have deleted a message then i expect that person to realise im not interested. I dont have to justify myself to anyone. Rant over.

Happy Fabbing

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

Once people accept they are not ENTITLED to a reply, they enjoy fab more."

This!

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By *inkySeeKinkyDoWoman
over a year ago

'tween PontyCarlo & CasVegas in West Yorks

Also factor in the responses you give...do they always warrant a reply?

A How are you?

B Good thanks, you?

A Good thanks

B Good

A Good

B {ummmmm looks around the room for something shiny to distract from this dulldom}

A {gets offended and starts a whinge thread}

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

" give us a break ffs!

Our bodies are not cum dumps for every man that asks or charities. We don't have to "give you a break!"

If you meant it tongue-in-cheek, then apologies.

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By *omesticated_VixenWoman
over a year ago

sw London

I used to reply to every single message, I then got a 24hr ban as I had used too many messages!

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"I used to reply to every single message, I then got a 24hr ban as I had used too many messages!"

You get banned for messaging?!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you're on a night out what's more fun? Engaging in polite but boring chit chat with every random who wants to talk to you, or having proper chats/a laugh with people you're into?

It's really dull trying to respond to every single 'how's u' and just generates worse responses so it sucks all the fun out of coming on. Bit harsh but true.

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By *arnished Halo OP Man
over a year ago

Oldbury

"When you're on a night out what's more fun? Engaging in polite but boring chit chat with every random who wants to talk to you, or having proper chats/a laugh with people you're into?

It's really dull trying to respond to every single 'how's u' and just generates worse responses so it sucks all the fun out of coming on. Bit harsh but true."

How about if someone approaches you to talk, you respond back and then they walk off without responding?

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By *omesticated_VixenWoman
over a year ago

sw London

"I used to reply to every single message, I then got a 24hr ban as I had used too many messages!

You get banned for messaging?!!

Well not quite banned, I was told I had used up all my messages and wasn't permitted to send anymore for 24 hrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When you're on a night out what's more fun? Engaging in polite but boring chit chat with every random who wants to talk to you, or having proper chats/a laugh with people you're into?

It's really dull trying to respond to every single 'how's u' and just generates worse responses so it sucks all the fun out of coming on. Bit harsh but true.

How about if someone approaches you to talk, you respond back and then they walk off without responding? "

I'd probably go 'awww

', shrug it off, then get on with my night to be honest. Really wouldn't take it to heart, you know the ratios on here so every one woman you talk to is probably trying to reply to 50 other guys, it's not personal x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"unfortunately not every one takes a polite thanks but no thanks, so often people simply delete or delete and block to prevent the situation turning nasty

We always reply to messages.

However the reply is not always what the sender wants to read

If the sender gets abusive I enjoy goading them even more Just to wind them up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's very rare that I feel the urge to approach people on here so my interactions are minimal. Quality over quantity I say.

One thing that bugs me is how rude or dismissive people can be when you do take time to answer people.

Rant over. Back to my quiet corner

So you reply to every piece of junk mail that comes through your letterbox

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By *viatrixWoman
over a year ago

Redhill

"Try the FAQ's.

No one owes anyone anything on here."

Pretty much this.

I was called a “fugly c*nt” a couple of days ago because I said no thanks to someone who had been very persistent and I was being “polite”

replying to messages.

Now everyone I’m not interested in gets no reply and a delete.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well if they ever get around to updating the site, I’m voting for a polite no thank you button along with a stop pestering me now flag

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Messages from people who have not read your profile and don't meet your requirements don't deserve a reply!

Similarly, tedious messages (hey/ yous up to much / wanna meet now etc) don't deserve a reply.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When you get the amount of mail per day that I do, plus having a full time job too, you physically can't reply to every single one!

Also for me, if it contains a pic of someone's naked mole rat, it'll get blocked and deleted without a reply... Says that clearly on my profile!

It's just impossible for all the girls to reply to every single mail they receive... Become a girl for a day on here and you'll get what I'm saying! X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Totally agree here manners cost nothing ppl.

Instead of being desperate for pics to get fabbed a simple reply saying thanks but no thanks is all you need. So many ppl on here just craving attention and talk just utter shit it's funny as.

My 2 cents attention seeking ppl :p

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By *egin551Couple
over a year ago

south west !

Hi Guys

Most times we get between 50 to 100 messages a day, this goes up considerably when pictures are uploaded.

Sometimes we have no messages at all

Once you’ve answered the message, you get the replies, most are a polite ‘thank you’ or ‘nice profile’ some would like a friendly conversation.

Some are rude, some are downright discussing and some are just abusive.

We decided to only reply to the ones we are interested in

Like the rest of Fab, we have a life outside the lifestyle and can cannot possibly answer these messages everyday.

Our advice, just pass it by if you don’t get an answer, It’s just not worth getting upset about it.

Take things as they come and you might be surprised.

Anyway I’m off to bed I have a very hot wife waiting for me upstairs.

So night night Fab and be naughty !!

Cheers

Mr Legin

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When you get the amount of mail per day that I do, plus having a full time job too, you physically can't reply to every single one!

Also for me, if it contains a pic of someone's naked mole rat, it'll get blocked and deleted without a reply... Says that clearly on my profile!

It's just impossible for all the girls to reply to every single mail they receive... Become a girl for a day on here and you'll get what I'm saying! X"

I bet you do .. You have a great profile and some excellent pictures.. Looking gorgeous btw xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's very rare that I feel the urge to approach people on here so my interactions are minimal. Quality over quantity I say.

One thing that bugs me is how rude or dismissive people can be when you do take time to answer people.

Rant over. Back to my quiet corner

"
Hey whilst I sympathise and I do, you're going to have to get over manners, ifyou get friendly it still doesn't mean they can keep up with messages, they could be chatting to 5 or 6 other guys at same time and may not even fancy them guys as much as you but because they have their finger in all the pies you are missed, just move on to someone who gives you time, good luck

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

"It's very rare that I feel the urge to approach people on here so my interactions are minimal. Quality over quantity I say.

One thing that bugs me is how rude or dismissive people can be when you do take time to answer people.

Rant over. Back to my quiet corner

I find it plain rude, when people obviously havn't read my profile but still send me messages.

They don't meet my physically preferences, which are clearly stated.

They send cock & actions shots clearly not too.

They want an instant meet, I don't.

They send crass badly written porn scenarios, nothing turns me off more.

But by your definition, I'm rude for not replying with a polite no thanks.

OK!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's very rare that I feel the urge to approach people on here so my interactions are minimal. Quality over quantity I say.

One thing that bugs me is how rude or dismissive people can be when you do take time to answer people.

Rant over. Back to my quiet corner

I find it plain rude, when people obviously havn't read my profile but still send me messages.

They don't meet my physically preferences, which are clearly stated.

They send cock & actions shots clearly not too.

They want an instant meet, I don't.

They send crass badly written porn scenarios, nothing turns me off more.

But by your definition, I'm rude for not replying with a polite no thanks.

OK! "
Men just like pics, what can I say

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What about people that get a huge amount of messages?

Are they supposed to reply to each one with a no thanks?"

Exactly that! If I'm completely honest I do get a lot of messages it's triple figures everyday so it's not possible to reply to everybody even with a simple no thank you. Also as many on here have already pointed out, you often get "why not babe" oh and this increasingly happens "I'm too good for you anyway". The other thing is if I don't reply or delete when I get a message about 10 minutes later pestering me. It's not rude not to reply it's rude to think that simply because you send someone an unsolicited message they are obliged to reply to you and if they don't then they're being rude I just don't understand the mentality of it. If you send a message and it gets deleted or they don't reply they're not interested as this simple as that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I used to reply to every single message, I then got a 24hr ban as I had used too many messages!"

that's actually a very good point! if I replied no thank you to every message I received and wasn't interested in, then I wouldn't have any left in a day to reply to the people I was interested in.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How does it work then when a single man messages a couple. We think oh his profile looks good hes made an effort in his message included a face pic , couple of messages in we say so your def single( our preference as stated on our profile) and the message comes back oh no im married do we reply out of courtesy or delete thinking flipping heck that was a bit of a time waste he didnt read our profile at all ??

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By *illen5Man
over a year ago

Bath

"It's very rare that I feel the urge to approach people on here so my interactions are minimal. Quality over quantity I say.

One thing that bugs me is how rude or dismissive people can be when you do take time to answer people.

Rant over. Back to my quiet corner

One newbie posted an update. 1700 messages in 2 days. She wouldn't even have time to hit the delete button on each message. Bulk delete button beckons.

Deleted message usually speaks volumes in itself, especially if they've looked at your profile.

All rejection slips generate additional mail, mostly arsey. Therefore no incentive.

For those who do bother to say "not for me", i thank them for taking the time to respond.

Now if we could only get women to be as proactive at seeking a mate.

Yeah, i know, they're callied trannies and trans.

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By *ormerWelshcouple2020Man
over a year ago

Stourbridge

We have had the situation arise that when we reply the person keeps asking repeatedly.

Early on I would be polite and reply again but that only brought more so I stopped replying and blocked. Unfortunately there are a lot of similar examples of this.

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By *ormerWelshcouple2020Man
over a year ago

Stourbridge

Oh and the messages that are simply

Mmmmmm. Or hi. So alluring.........

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By *illen5Man
over a year ago

Bath

"How does it work then when a single man messages a couple. We think oh his profile looks good hes made an effort in his message included a face pic , couple of messages in we say so your def single( our preference as stated on our profile) and the message comes back oh no im married do we reply out of courtesy or delete thinking flipping heck that was a bit of a time waste he didnt read our profile at all ??"

It's very simple the man doesn't hear back. Single men quickly realise the futility of messaging fickle couples.

Couples get tons of messages from newbies though, as demonstated by the phrase "single men, we'll find you" .

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By *illen5Man
over a year ago

Bath

"Oh and the messages that are simply

Mmmmmm. Or hi. So alluring........."

You forgot the "what you into?"

And "what you doing now"

Rejection slips are still classed as being noticed, such is the rarity of a message. To get a message back 'why not" must make you groan.

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By *illen5Man
over a year ago

Bath

"We have had the situation arise that when we reply the person keeps asking repeatedly.

Pestering. No different to the male of nearly every other species. Some find it difficult to rise above our genes...... except perhaps in the trouser dept. Haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Messages from people who have not read your profile and don't meet your requirements don't deserve a reply!

Similarly, tedious messages (hey/ yous up to much / wanna meet now etc) don't deserve a reply."

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By *illen5Man
over a year ago

Bath

"Messages from people who have not read your profile and don't meet your requirements don't deserve a reply!

Similarly, tedious messages (hey/ yous up to much / wanna meet now etc) don't deserve a reply.

You'd think that after sending out several thousand of these! at best copy and paste gems that the reality would slowly Dawn on them.

It's a shame that Chancers are so thick.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Messages from people who have not read your profile and don't meet your requirements don't deserve a reply!

Similarly, tedious messages (hey/ yous up to much / wanna meet now etc) don't deserve a reply.

You'd think that after sending out several thousand of these! at best copy and paste gems that the reality would slowly Dawn on them.

It's a shame that Chancers are so thick."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's very rare that I feel the urge to approach people on here so my interactions are minimal. Quality over quantity I say.

One thing that bugs me is how rude or dismissive people can be when you do take time to answer people.

Rant over. Back to my quiet corner

No, it isn't!

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By *arnished Halo OP Man
over a year ago

Oldbury

"What about people that get a huge amount of messages?

Are they supposed to reply to each one with a no thanks?

It's not that situation that I find rude. I don't expect a reply if I send an unsolicited message. It's ones where people contact me 1st and I take time to reply back and I see that get deleted straight away without reply.

I fully understand why ladies/couples mass delete unsolicited ones given volume involved.

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By *arnished Halo OP Man
over a year ago

Oldbury

"It's very rare that I feel the urge to approach people on here so my interactions are minimal. Quality over quantity I say.

One thing that bugs me is how rude or dismissive people can be when you do take time to answer people.

Rant over. Back to my quiet corner

I find it plain rude, when people obviously havn't read my profile but still send me messages.

They don't meet my physically preferences, which are clearly stated.

They send cock & actions shots clearly not too.

They want an instant meet, I don't.

They send crass badly written porn scenarios, nothing turns me off more.

But by your definition, I'm rude for not replying with a polite no thanks.

OK! "

My definition isn't the scenario you are talking about. It's one where you have approached someone first, not the male, and the male took time to reply to you for You then to delete without reply.

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By *he riverdeep69Couple
over a year ago

North west ish

"What about people that get a huge amount of messages?

Are they supposed to reply to each one with a no thanks?

I fully understand why ladies/couples mass delete unsolicited ones given volume involved."

It's quite simple - something in your reply has turned them off. Some people struggle with rejection, so some don't reply to say no thanks. That's not rude. That's someone changing their mind about someone being a potential playmate, and not being prepared to get abuse. It will not change.

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By *arnished Halo OP Man
over a year ago

Oldbury

"What about people that get a huge amount of messages?

Are they supposed to reply to each one with a no thanks?

I fully understand why ladies/couples mass delete unsolicited ones given volume involved.

That's a fair point.

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By *hil39Man
over a year ago

Dagenham

I get a bit peed off when I read a profile and it says no one liners etc, I'm mot a great writer so if I really want to chat with that person I will make the effort and write something that at least has content and then it still gets deleted, so what is best, a one line "hello, I'm me, I have read your profile and would like to chat sometime" or write war and piece and still get deleted, I agree a simple no thanks, not interested would go a long way (I am one of those that accepts no is no) Have fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Totally agree here manners cost nothing ppl.

Instead of being desperate for pics to get fabbed a simple reply saying thanks but no thanks is all you need. So many ppl on here just craving attention and talk just utter shit it's funny as.

My 2 cents attention seeking ppl :p"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why is it always men moaning about this? Where are the women complaining about not being responded to?

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By *ily Con CarneTV/TS
over a year ago

Cornwall

OP..do you reply to every piece of junk mail that gets posted through your letterbox? No?..I thought not."

I love getting junk mail ...it makes me think I'm popular

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why is it always men moaning about this? Where are the women complaining about not being responded to? "

Hmmm, now let me think about that one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh and lets add cpls to that question as well shall we

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why is it always men moaning about this? Where are the women complaining about not being responded to?

Hmmm, now let me think about that one

Because women are not so desperate to have sex. I’ve probably only sent about 3 messages first to anyone in the last year. I’m pretty picky who I want to talk to but men fire out hundreds of messages in the hope of some action.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Desperation is pretty unattractive.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thats down to nature and the fact that fems and cpls can well afford to be choosy lol

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By *dam and slutCouple
over a year ago

Manchester

I am at the point of telling people to fuck off..I mean read my damn profile pal. How many ways can I say we are taking a break... but nope, still the wot ya wearing, wot ya into then messages arrive....

So now, I am replying like this.

exite, abeo, discedo, abito, apoculo..yep in Latin.

Adam

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thats down to nature and the fact that fems and cpls can well afford to be choosy lol"

Can afford? I would hope that most people would be choosy with whom they meet whether it’s just sex or dating. My standards are the same for both.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I am at the point of telling people to fuck off..I mean read my damn profile pal. How many ways can I say we are taking a break... but nope, still the wot ya wearing, wot ya into then messages arrive....

So now, I am replying like this.

exite, abeo, discedo, abito, apoculo..yep in Latin.

Adam

I had a break for a bit and it was unbelievable the amount that still messaged.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Desperation is pretty unattractive. "

I agree, only have to look in chat rooms to see that.

I also find narcissism unattractive

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By *oppet22TV/TS
over a year ago

huddersfield

It ok for us male or cds we only get a few to anser just think of the couples and female on here will get loads so if you do get a replay be thankful and stay polite

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Desperation is pretty unattractive.

I agree, only have to look in chat rooms to see that.

I also find narcissism unattractive

Both are equally unattractive but if you are trying to call me ‘narcissistic’ then you hate me very wrong.

I wouldn’t know about the chat rooms, they don’t sound like my kind of place.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"Well if they ever get around to updating the site, I’m voting for a polite no thank you button along with a stop pestering me now flag

There used to be a "thanks but no thanks" button but they removed it, why? Because the forums were full of men with ball ache, bitching about the cunts who were too rude and up their own arses to even send a polite no thanks personal message, but an automated one!

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By *ogNMuseCouple
over a year ago

Surrey

It's quite simple, it's not purely a single male problem, thats just an easy scapegoat.

There are hundreds, probably thousands of single men on here who have no problem getting meets, replies, etc.

If you aren't getting any replies, no matter whether it's from a first message or the 100th, then simply change your approach, and keep changing it till you find the way that works for you.

All that time and effort spent writing posts moaning could have been put to productive use.

Surely people have conversed with members of the opposite sex in 'real life' before, how was your success rate then? If it was good then simply transfer that mindset to here.

Simple things like asking open questions that have to be answered with more than a 'yes' or 'no' can be ways of getting a conversation going.

Remember Effort=Reward

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Desperation is pretty unattractive.

I agree, only have to look in chat rooms to see that.

I also find narcissism unattractive

Both are equally unattractive but if you are trying to call me ‘narcissistic’ then you hate me very wrong.

I wouldn’t know about the chat rooms, they don’t sound like my kind of place. "

Wasnt necessarily aimed at anyone in particular, was just making the point that because of the volume of messages that some get they get an inflated opinion of themselves

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Desperation is pretty unattractive.

I agree, only have to look in chat rooms to see that.

I also find narcissism unattractive

Both are equally unattractive but if you are trying to call me ‘narcissistic’ then you hate me very wrong.

I wouldn’t know about the chat rooms, they don’t sound like my kind of place.

Wasnt necessarily aimed at anyone in particular, was just making the point that because of the volume of messages that some get they get an inflated opinion of themselves

Thankfully because of what I am looking for, I don’t get loads generally. I’m happy about that as couldn’t go back to getting loads again.

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

So now, I am replying like this.

exite, abeo, discedo, abito, apoculo..yep in Latin.

Adam

Quod callidus est

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

"What about people that get a huge amount of messages?

Are they supposed to reply to each one with a no thanks?

I fully understand why ladies/couples mass delete unsolicited ones given volume involved.

As stated above.

I have been chatting with someone, several messages, things going OK.

Then something happens, it could one of dozens things, but it's something that puts me off continuing interacting with that person.

I have learnt from experience, that at this point, telling that person I'm ceasing communication, just opens me up for either a flood more messages, a barrage of abuse or having my name plastered accross a ranty status.

You may still call it rude , taking the cowards way out, but just ignoring, deleting, even blocking at that point is often the less painless way of dealing with the situation

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"I get a bit peed off when I read a profile and it says no one liners etc, I'm mot a great writer so if I really want to chat with that person I will make the effort and write something that at least has content and then it still gets deleted, so what is best, a one line "hello, I'm me, I have read your profile and would like to chat sometime" or write war and piece and still get deleted, I agree a simple no thanks, not interested would go a long way (I am one of those that accepts no is no) Have fun

Problem is, dammed if you do, dammed if you don't.

For example you may prefer Victoria Beckham types to Dawn French types but don't state it on your profile fearing offending people. Problem arises when the Dawn French type sends you a detailed message and a photo and it's not for you.

Those type of people don't like confrontation, that's why their profile attracts, they appear open to meeting anyone who meets their generic profile. The reality is they do have preferences...they keep to themselves!

My advice, be selective yourself. Don't take a scattergun approach. Decide what you want and check the profile is specifically seeking someone like you. Look at their pictures, verifications etc if you're not sure.

Finally, accept NONE of us has universal appeal and when it comes to sexual interaction no one has to justify why they don't want to fuck you.

Good luck.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"Why is it always men moaning about this? Where are the women complaining about not being responded to? "

We accept we're not everyone's cup of java, the world still turns as we get on with our lives.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why is it always men moaning about this? Where are the women complaining about not being responded to?

We accept we're not everyone's cup of java, the world still turns as we get on with our lives."

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"Thats down to nature and the fact that fems and cpls can well afford to be choosy lol"

Can afford?!!

Speak for yourself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Woow a sensitive person on fab who'd have thought it.

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By *elshsunsWoman
over a year ago

Flintshire

I’m afraid when I say no thanks some men then take it as an excuse to start a conversation ... or then become abusive ... withcomments like your loss or you don’t know what your missing ... so I’m sorry I just ignore ... far easier ...

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

"Thats down to nature and the fact that fems and cpls can well afford to be choosy lol

Can afford? I would hope that most people would be choosy with whom they meet whether it’s just sex or dating. My standards are the same for both. "

Mine differ in that for D/s I only play with tall, sexually submissive white men.

For a relationship it's whoever I'm sexually attracted to who makes me tingle.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’m afraid when I say no thanks some men then take it as an excuse to start a conversation ... or then become abusive ... withcomments like your loss or you don’t know what your missing ... so I’m sorry I just ignore ... far easier ...

"
cmon life is all about its challenges some of the best people in life are challenging

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By *hil39Man
over a year ago

Dagenham

Problem is, dammed if you do, dammed if you don't.

Finally, accept NONE of us has universal appeal and when it comes to sexual interaction no one has to justify why they don't want to fuck you.

Good luck."

Thanks for your comments and I appreciate your suggestions for my profile amendments, however I do actually like all shapes and sizes of women (variety is the spice of life) as you can see from that I am not that great at writing stuff, more just a bit of a joker in real life.

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By *urvymamaWoman
over a year ago

Doncaster

If you aren’t a site supporter you can only send 100 messages a day. This is why you see statuses that say “sorry ran out of messages today”.

I’ve currently got 284 unread messages with more coming in over the course of the day too. It wouldn’t even be mathematically possible to reply to them all this is why the sites FAQs say to take a delete as a polite no thanks.

So most of the non-replies have nothing to do with rudeness the messages are just best reserved for people of interest, especially if you like a bit of a conversation first to see if the persons a good fit for a meet

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By *hil39Man
over a year ago

Dagenham

"If you aren’t a site supporter you can only send 100 messages a day. This is why you see statuses that say “sorry ran out of messages today”.

I hadn't thought of that aspect, I guess because I never get close to 100, in fact 10 is a good day for me, lmao

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On the rare occasion I get a not thanks reply. I always reply thanks and good luck.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

Problem is, dammed if you do, dammed if you don't.

Finally, accept NONE of us has universal appeal and when it comes to sexual interaction no one has to justify why they don't want to fuck you.

Good luck.

You've missed my point. People have preferences they don't state on their profile so they get inundated with messages from everyone. They then don't reply because you're outwith what they're looking for.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Interesting post. Like many couples we get lots of messages. We have rejected people and get tired of guys who then throw there teddies out of the prom. We do reply to most even if it’s just to say no thanks.

However if guys don’t take the time to read the profile fully and at least make an effort as it asks. Then send a dick pic or hide behind a pair of sunglasses. Or a pic you can not clearly see the face. Then it’s simple. If you can’t make the effort to follow what the profile asks then why should we take time to reply only to get a sarcastic reply.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Throw out of the pram we meant. Sorry. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t bother replying to men I’m not interested in, even a simple ‘thank you, I’m flattered but not interested. Hope you find what you’re looking for’ can be followed with abuse.

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

I'm very rude..

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By *hil39Man
over a year ago

Dagenham

Problem is, dammed if you do, dammed if you don't.

Finally, accept NONE of us has universal appeal and when it comes to sexual interaction no one has to justify why they don't want to fuck you.

Good luck.

Forgot to mention, I'm also an idiot, lol, sorry for missing the point, I even added to my profile,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do a mixture of replying and not replying!

Wish people read my profile about location, it's only brief. Saves me getting back with - LOCAL guys only thanks - or the choice to delete!

Haha mad innit!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I do a mixture of replying and not replying!

Wish people read my profile about location, it's only brief. Saves me getting back with - LOCAL guys only thanks - or the choice to delete!

Haha mad innit!

"
where's Blackpool? How's the bulbs?

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By *elshsunsWoman
over a year ago

Flintshire

cmon life is all about its challenges some of the best people in life are challenging "

I’ve had enough challenges in my life thanks ... don’t need any more

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By *edtothecore74Woman
over a year ago

Spalding

"It's very rare that I feel the urge to approach people on here so my interactions are minimal. Quality over quantity I say.

One thing that bugs me is how rude or dismissive people can be when you do take time to answer people.

Rant over. Back to my quiet corner

Oh, poor you....

Try being a woman on here, then you might actually experience rudeness...

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By *lay 4 uMan
over a year ago

bolton

Messaged a couple (who shall remain nameless) only to be told that because I added Something in my replay that I was liar. Not only rude men on here

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By *eneral HysteriaMan
over a year ago

Newcastle

"It's very rare that I feel the urge to approach people on here so my interactions are minimal. Quality over quantity I say.

One thing that bugs me is how rude or dismissive people can be when you do take time to answer people.

Rant over. Back to my quiet corner

That's the internet for yah.

Welcome aboard.

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By *dam and slutCouple
over a year ago

Manchester

So now, I am replying like this.

exite, abeo, discedo, abito, apoculo..yep in Latin.

Adam

Quod callidus est"

No ulterior motive, please accept my thanks for your kind words..I hope santa brings you something special. .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's very rare that I feel the urge to approach people on here so my interactions are minimal. Quality over quantity I say.

One thing that bugs me is how rude or dismissive people can be when you do take time to answer people.

Rant over. Back to my quiet corner

Oh, poor you....

Try being a woman on here, then you might actually experience rudeness..."

To be honest i think a lot of the "women" in here are men!

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By *arnished Halo OP Man
over a year ago

Oldbury

"It's very rare that I feel the urge to approach people on here so my interactions are minimal. Quality over quantity I say.

One thing that bugs me is how rude or dismissive people can be when you do take time to answer people.

Rant over. Back to my quiet corner

Oh, poor you....

Try being a woman on here, then you might actually experience rudeness...

To be honest i think a lot of the "women" in here are men!

Monty Python sketch in reverse.

"Are there any...men in here"

:::deep voices:::

"No no no"

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By *kbloke_11Man
over a year ago

Hockley

In general, good manners is something that is terribly lacking in society today, but if you're a female or couple on here who get bombarded by hundreds of messages a day, a bulk delete really is the only way they can go, lifes too short to go through each one and, after all, this IS supposed to be fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if i answer no thanks i get abused and i dont mean things like fuck off i mean really nasty stuff just for saying no thanks ... so i dont bother as site rules state no answer is no thanks.

not only that but i get 100s of messages too and its impossible so i have a system now and i stick to it the only people i message back are those that grab my attention, if i get 200 messages it will be 100 just saying hi or hows you ?? 25 hey fancy a fuck ?? 25 living so far then 40 from people who just plainly have not read my profile leaving 10 or less with messages of effot but ill still be lucky to find a meet so cant win and im dammed if im messaging all those waste of space messages back no chance everyone on here must know when you messages someone you have no rights to a reply just like the junk mail via your letter box 99% goes to trash

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In general, good manners is something that is terribly lacking in society today, but if you're a female or couple on here who get bombarded by hundreds of messages a day, a bulk delete really is the only way they can go, lifes too short to go through each one and, after all, this IS supposed to be fun"

I can just about remember when it was still FUN

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By *lceeWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

"It's very rare that I feel the urge to approach people on here so my interactions are minimal. Quality over quantity I say.

One thing that bugs me is how rude or dismissive people can be when you do take time to answer people.

Rant over. Back to my quiet corner

This is one of the most common misconceptions on here. You say you don’t reach out often - that is great, it works for you. I’m going to assume that you don’t get messaged often either, as that seems to be a common refrain from guys on here.

So, for you OP, Fab is a wonderland that you wander around, occasionally chatting to people and on the forums.

Imagine, if you will, what Fab might be like for those you are messaging. Rather than the relaxed and somewhat laid-back experience that you enjoy, imagine a world where you receive on average 20-30 messages per hour. Per. Hour. Even with decent filters on.

Let’s break it down mathematically, shall we? To see there’s a message and check out the profile (read the text, look at the photos, check whether the Interests list aligns and scroll through the veris). Conservatively, takes one minute. Then to go back, actually read the message and compose a ‘thanks but no thanks’ response. Two minutes, at a push?

So three minutes, if you’re fast. If you get the lower end of 20 mails an hour, that’s 60 minutes of responding. If you get more...hot damn, you’re getting further and further behind each hour.

Then there’s jobs to do to pay the bills; friends, families and significant others to spend time with; household chores; weekly shopping...you know, the life we all have outside of here.

It’s not rudeness behind a delete unread - it’s inbox management. I despise bad manners but it wouldn’t occur to me to respond to someone when I don’t think we’d be compatible. By deleting unread, a clear message is sent.

OP - I appreciate it must be frustrating but maybe think about this from someone else’s point of view.

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By *m35279Woman
over a year ago

belfast

Is it really going to make someone’s day better with a reply stating rejection? I prefer the silence lol if someone isn’t interested in me lol.

I’ve tried replying and saying no before to guys even when my profile states I don’t want guys. They mostly call me arrogant, fat (I know I am), accuse me of being like ‘every other woman on here’ or offer me money with ‘oh come onnnn it’s just a blow job’

Delete button VS thon above, I chose delete button. I have no issues with men. I’m happy to make platonic friends with men on here. It’s a swinging site. No man wants to just be my friend. Understandable.

Consensus: delete button works for me.

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By *ackDanielsWhiteRabbitMan
over a year ago

Halifax

"It's very rare that I feel the urge to approach people on here so my interactions are minimal. Quality over quantity I say.

One thing that bugs me is how rude or dismissive people can be when you do take time to answer people.

Rant over. Back to my quiet corner

So, for you OP, Fab is a wonderland that you wander around, occasionally chatting to people and on the forums.

So three minutes, if you’re fast. If you get the lower end of 20 mails an hour, that’s 60 minutes of responding. If you get more...hot damn, you’re getting further and further behind each hour.

Then there’s jobs to do to pay the bills; friends, families and significant others to spend time with; household chores; weekly shopping...you know, the life we all have outside of here.

OP - I appreciate it must be frustrating but maybe think about this from someone else’s point of view. "

I treat myself to that cookie. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We ignore because telling people no results in abuse and they try to change your mind or start a conversation going it's just easier to not reply.

You men moan about it but I'd love to see how you cope with all the crap messages

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By *he riverdeep69Couple
over a year ago

North west ish

"if i answer no thanks i get abused and i dont mean things like fuck off i mean really nasty stuff just for saying no thanks ... so i dont bother as site rules state no answer is no thanks.

You dont even have to respond to messages. We've had abuse for just posting on this thread. Is it going to change how we meet? - nah.

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By *orthyorkypairCouple
over a year ago

North Yorkshire

"As I mentioned earlier, I am not talking about me approaching people. I am talking about people who have approached me first. "

there is some justification in expecting a reply in that case but not in the case of the tons of mail fems and some couples get

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By *wisted999Man
over a year ago

North Bucks

Lot of whining going on.

Fabs great if you use it effectively

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By *bsolutebeginnersCouple
over a year ago

Planet Ork

People change their mind on here. We’ve had conversations going on for a couple of weeks and then get blocked. They’ve obviously changed their mind and can’t be arsed with the rigmarole of explaining why.

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By *ackDanielsWhiteRabbitMan
over a year ago

Halifax

"Lot of whining going on.

Fabs great if you use it effectively

Exactly this.

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By *iReyWoman
over a year ago

Cheshire East

Given that so many men get nasty when you say no and throw insults or just keep messaging to try and change your mind it's easier to delete and / or block

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I do a mixture of replying and not replying!

Wish people read my profile about location, it's only brief. Saves me getting back with - LOCAL guys only thanks - or the choice to delete!

Haha mad innit!

where's Blackpool? How's the bulbs?"

You'd love it ere!

Plenty of fun and the bulbs are massive

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I do a mixture of replying and not replying!

Wish people read my profile about location, it's only brief. Saves me getting back with - LOCAL guys only thanks - or the choice to delete!

Haha mad innit!

where's Blackpool? How's the bulbs?

You'd love it ere!

Plenty of fun and the bulbs are massive

"
yes but it's not about the size

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"I used to reply to every single message, I then got a 24hr ban as I had used too many messages!

You get banned for messaging?!!

Yes, if you've sent too many. It happened to me once after I answered every message. I think perhaps it triggers a spam filter? At any rate, I had to wait till the next day when it reset.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"It's very rare that I feel the urge to approach people on here so my interactions are minimal. Quality over quantity I say.

One thing that bugs me is how rude or dismissive people can be when you do take time to answer people.

Rant over. Back to my quiet corner

So, for you OP, Fab is a wonderland that you wander around, occasionally chatting to people and on the forums.

So three minutes, if you’re fast. If you get the lower end of 20 mails an hour, that’s 60 minutes of responding. If you get more...hot damn, you’re getting further and further behind each hour.

Then there’s jobs to do to pay the bills; friends, families and significant others to spend time with; household chores; weekly shopping...you know, the life we all have outside of here.

OP - I appreciate it must be frustrating but maybe think about this from someone else’s point of view. "

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By *ust RachelTV/TS
over a year ago

Horsham

Copy and paste a simple no thanks

LOL

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Copy and paste a simple no thanks

LOL "

That would be fine if the majority of people who i said it to left it at that, but they don't. You either then get bombarded with more messages from the same person wanting to know why you're not interested or you get abuse so it's simpler and easier just to delete.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I do a mixture of replying and not replying!

Wish people read my profile about location, it's only brief. Saves me getting back with - LOCAL guys only thanks - or the choice to delete!

Haha mad innit!

where's Blackpool? How's the bulbs?

You'd love it ere!

Plenty of fun and the bulbs are massive

yes but it's not about the size "

What is it about then?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if someone messages you then after a message or two no longer communicates you should just leave it.

wait for them to get back in touch, it could be your reply is under another 100+ messages she/they have to get through before they see yours.

and if they never reply. take it as not interested

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cost nothing to be polite and reply ,

!!!!

Yes it does....it costs my time.

My time is just that....my time. Not someone else's.

Your basically demanding to be acknowledged by people.....people who never asked you to contact them in the first place.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's very rare that I feel the urge to approach people on here so my interactions are minimal. Quality over quantity I say.

One thing that bugs me is how rude or dismissive people can be when you do take time to answer people.

Rant over. Back to my quiet corner

So you've been here over a year and still don't have a clue how the site is Supposed to work. Not really much point explaining then is there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well if they ever get around to updating the site, I’m voting for a polite no thank you button along with a stop pestering me now flag

Exactly they will still complain..... The only thing men will accept is getting what they want.

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By *illen5Man
over a year ago

Bath

"Why is it always men moaning about this? Where are the women complaining about not being responded to?

Hmmm, now let me think about that one

I'm afraid the behaviour of men and women are a reflection of the animal kingdom. We're no better.

Men hassling someone to submission/blocking

Sending out 100s of messages isn't desperate. Just biology.

For every 100 genuine messages I send to women I'm attracted, about 5% reply.

10% of those I chat with. 10% of those I chat to I might meet.

50% of those I meet might go further.

I make that 1 in 4000 might lead to something sexual.

Needless to say,this is not the place for sexual encounters

It's therefore no surprise that a woman will get more unsolicited messages in 5mins than a man will in 50yrs.

Stick to the forum and enjoy the banter.

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By *lay 4 uMan
over a year ago

bolton

Thankfully the block button works for single guys as well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think if I was getting a fair few messages every day and then abuse (even occasional) from the odd one I replied "no thanks" to then I would'nt reply either. Delete seems like a straightforward no thanks. I delete mine once sent and that works for me although I dont send that many to begin with.

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"Well if they ever get around to updating the site, I’m voting for a polite no thank you button along with a stop pestering me now flag

Exactly they will still complain..... The only thing men will accept is getting what they want."

You're forgetting couples.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well if they ever get around to updating the site, I’m voting for a polite no thank you button along with a stop pestering me now flag

Exactly they will still complain..... The only thing men will accept is getting what they want."
I accept barclaycc#ard and visa

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My take is that if you have the time to read then take a few mins to reply, how long does "no thanks" take?

If youre that rushed, leave reading mail till you have a bit of time, simple...

Similarly, you could read the site FAQ's that specifically state that no-one owes you a reply, that some members receive a lot of messages and that, on fab, it is NOT considered rude not to reply.

I consider it rather hypocritical and perhaps 'rude' that those who complain about the lack of replies, and mentioning how little time it takes to read a message, can't take a few minutes to familiarise themselves with site rules and the FAQ's

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By *sGivesWoodWoman
over a year ago

ST. AUSTELL, CORNWALL

"My take is that if you have the time to read then take a few mins to reply, how long does "no thanks" take?

If youre that rushed, leave reading mail till you have a bit of time, simple...

Similarly, you could read the site FAQ's that specifically state that no-one owes you a reply, that some members receive a lot of messages and that, on fab, it is NOT considered rude not to reply.

Or what's written on a profile. I find it rude when it's ignored completely.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My take is that if you have the time to read then take a few mins to reply, how long does "no thanks" take?

If youre that rushed, leave reading mail till you have a bit of time, simple...

Similarly, you could read the site FAQ's that specifically state that no-one owes you a reply, that some members receive a lot of messages and that, on fab, it is NOT considered rude not to reply.

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