FabSwingers.com forum: "Delete if no interest" seems..

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

a kinda sensible thing to put in a message.

Of course a polite no thanks is nice (although obviously not as a good as a "Hello there"!) but I know how idle, sorry busy, people are.

But no, time and again the damn thing sits there marked read but no reply.

Fab-manners.....oh well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why don't you just delete all your sent mail as soon as you've sent it? That way you'll not know what the recipient has done with it then get on with your life without another thought for it. You'll either get a reply or you won't, no big deal.

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

To be honest, having messages read is rare enough - they usually just disappear, presumably smothered by all the later messages inundating the recipient.

What you'll never be able to do though, is impose your idea of manners on the rest of society.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why don't you just delete all your sent mail as soon as you've sent it? That way you'll not know what the recipient has done with it then get on with your life without another thought for it. You'll either get a reply or you won't, no big deal. "
This is actually a very good idea, guys it's really the best way to deal with this place then you won't be apportioning blame to the people concerned and also by doing this, it means you can remessage because you have no idea whether you've messaged them or if indeed they saw your message or read it the first time

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Replying to messages to single with a no like my last one. Went hi hun want a bump. Sorry your are way under my age limits and a single man. Answer you are an ageist timewaster and blocked me. "

Which is EXACTLY why I put delete if no interest. Point missed, my dear

PS Why do people get so worked up about blocking? It's only Fab....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm amazed and amused at how offended people get by my laziness and apparent rudeness. I now completely ignore my inbox just to wind people up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/12/18 11:19:08]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Replying to messages to single with a no like my last one. Went hi hun want a bump. Sorry your are way under my age limits and a single man. Answer you are an ageist timewaster and blocked me.

Which is EXACTLY why I put delete if no interest. Point missed, my dear

PS Why do people get so worked up about blocking? It's only Fab...."

Why do people get so worked up about read not replied to messages, its only fab.......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Replying to messages to single with a no like my last one. Went hi hun want a bump. Sorry your are way under my age limits and a single man. Answer you are an ageist timewaster and blocked me.

Which is EXACTLY why I put delete if no interest. Point missed, my dear

PS Why do people get so worked up about blocking? It's only Fab....

Why do people get so worked up about read not replied to messages, its only fab.......

"
I don't, it doesn't bother me I never send first messages

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

This site isn't based on manners.

It's based on attraction.

If you don't get a reply then they aren't attracted and aren't interested.

Whinging about manners ,or lack of, isn't going to change that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Replying to messages to single with a no like my last one. Went hi hun want a bump. Sorry your are way under my age limits and a single man. Answer you are an ageist timewaster and blocked me.

Which is EXACTLY why I put delete if no interest. Point missed, my dear

PS Why do people get so worked up about blocking? It's only Fab....

Why do people get so worked up about read not replied to messages, its only fab.......

I don't, it doesn't bother me I never send first messages "

That wasn't directed at you my lovely

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This site isn't based on manners.

It's based on attraction.

If you don't get a reply then they aren't attracted and aren't interested.

Whinging about manners ,or lack of, isn't going to change that.

"
that's not strictly true loads of lovely mannerable people here and don't forget those women who get messages numbers in the 100s everyday don't generally look at them, not much point they can't keep up anyway and the guys don't know how many messages that person gets I've chatted to a very sexy woman on here we get on but she admits she can't cope with message numbers so doesn't bother, for me that means it's pointless messaging that person so I don't bother

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By *ain n MableWoman
over a year ago

Milton Keynes

Once you send a message to someone's inbox they are entitled to do as they wish with it.

If you ordered me to "Delete it if not interested" then obviously I would do the complete opposite to get you worked up into state you are now..

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Once you send a message to someone's inbox they are entitled to do as they wish with it.

If you ordered me to "Delete it if not interested" then obviously I would do the complete opposite to get you worked up into state you are now.."

Gosh, how charming of you

What started off as a mild-mannered and not unreasonable whinge IS making me start to despair of Fabdom

PS Ordered? Eh? How about requested?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One of the first messages we got from a single straight guy was:

You sound really hot, would love to fuck you hard.

I replied, sounds great, can the missus watch

Still waiting for my reply

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By *ain n MableWoman
over a year ago

Milton Keynes

"Once you send a message to someone's inbox they are entitled to do as they wish with it.

If you ordered me to "Delete it if not interested" then obviously I would do the complete opposite to get you worked up into state you are now..

Gosh, how charming of you

What started off as a mild-mannered and not unreasonable whinge IS making me start to despair of Fabdom

PS Ordered? Eh? How about requested?"

"Can I ask you to delete if not interested" is a request "Delete if no interest" is an order.

You asked a very honest question and I gave you a very honest answer. If you are not going to like some answers then I suggest you don't ask people's opinions.

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By *evaquitCouple
over a year ago

Catthorpe

"I'm amazed and amused at how offended people get by my laziness and apparent rudeness. I now completely ignore my inbox just to wind people up

Bloody rebel.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Once you send a message to someone's inbox they are entitled to do as they wish with it.

If you ordered me to "Delete it if not interested" then obviously I would do the complete opposite to get you worked up into state you are now..

Gosh, how charming of you

What started off as a mild-mannered and not unreasonable whinge IS making me start to despair of Fabdom

PS Ordered? Eh? How about requested?

"Can I ask you to delete if not interested" is a request "Delete if no interest" is an order.

You asked a very honest question and I gave you a very honest answer. If you are not going to like some answers then I suggest you don't ask people's opinions. "

Too right! The whole tone of OP is coming across really patronising, we people are not going to be into you and are going to skim your messages. Get over it! Even as a single woman on here I've messaged couples I'd love to get to know and haven't had any reply or deletion of my messages, I moved on because I obviously got that they weren't interested in me.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

You lot are extraordinary.

Of course I get over it, other than being a bit miffed that there is no interest it's hardly a tragedy!!

But one poster not even bothering to think that the "please delete" would be read in the context of an otherwise charming message and another suggesting that expecting basic good manners is patronising......really.

The evidence from this thread seems to be that there are few "mannerable" people on here, whatever "mannerable" is.

Throws hands in air and gives up!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You lot are extraordinary.

Of course I get over it, other than being a bit miffed that there is no interest it's hardly a tragedy!!

The evidence from this thread seems to be that there are few "mannerable" people on here, whatever "mannerable" is.

Throws hands in air and gives up!!!!

It's depressing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Had a cracker from a 20 yo male other day

‘I wanna rim your arsehole’

I ignored it

4 more messages getting more abuse as if read original message ..

Eventually I replied saying he could and we could FaceTime Mrs slide as he did it

His reply is that I was a fucking pervert and he hoped I’d die soon

2 days after winked us

Now blocked

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Op, we get loads of messages each day and before we open the message we read the profile, if it dont suit or puts us off in any way we don't open the message. If we delete the message or ignore it this still means we are not interested so in the grand scheme of things does it really matter?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On the other hand I had a woman recently go off at me for deleting her messages after I had replied to her.

Said only timewasters do this and she got really funny about it.

So I just left it at that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think fab should take the ability to see the status of a sent message away, it causes too much angst on here. I went through a phase a few years back of saving the messages I was interested in getting back to when I had more time and mass deleting my inbox but of course, the sender only sees I've deleted it and not saved it. Had a few abusive messages back which is fine as I soon deleted those potential meets in my saved box when they showed their true colours!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Well that seems a kinda sensible approach. And when a reply does come, well it would be a nice surprise.

And no, it doesn't really matter at all.

But if one offers someone to chance to say no thanks with a single click of the mouse, not taking it seems just lazy beyond belief....

For what it's worth, if a message is deleted I almost always block to save hassling in future. Unless they are VERY hot

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Relish it as us ladies of Fab enabling you to explore your masochistic side OP...

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By *ystical_InkedBBWWoman
over a year ago

somewhere in the Shire of Derby

Probably because they've took the time to read the FAQS and took note of what was written

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't feel guilty about not replying or not reading mail.

Unless I have a meet up I am not looking so what is the point in answering some dull question

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't feel guilty about not replying or not reading mail.

Unless I have a meet up I am not looking so what is the point in answering some dull question "

Quite often they ask

Can I ask you a question

I block at that point ..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think people have missed the point the OP was making. If the recipient he has sent the message to is not interested why do they keep the message in their inbox after they have clearly read it.

Surely if you are not interested its just a delete, no reply required just delete it.

We are talking one click!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I really don't get this. Surely the only thing that matters is if they reply. Anything else they do with your message basically has the same meaning-they aren't interested.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think people have missed the point the OP was making. If the recipient he has sent the message to is not interested why do they keep the message in their inbox after they have clearly read it.

Surely if you are not interested its just a delete, no reply required just delete it.

We are talking one click!"

Surely if nothing happens the answer is no. It's not fucking rocket science.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Of course the answer is no, the OP is not disputing that. He is merely asking why the message is being kept rather than just deleted.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think people have missed the point the OP was making. If the recipient he has sent the message to is not interested why do they keep the message in their inbox after they have clearly read it.

Surely if you are not interested its just a delete, no reply required just delete it.

We are talking one click!"

A full inbox is an ego boost for sad people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nice thumb

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Steel - you, me and allabout can form the very tiny clique of Fabbers-with-manners

But what really blows my mind is why, rather than saying "good call, it's only a click", people find it more amusing to go to war over it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Of course the answer is no, the OP is not disputing that. He is merely asking why the message is being kept rather than just deleted.

"
If they get a lot of messages and don't look at messages often its like an infinity pool it goes over the edge and silently disappears

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Steel - you, me and allabout can form the very tiny clique of Fabbers-with-manners

But what really blows my mind is why, rather than saying "good call, it's only a click", people find it more amusing to go to war over it!"

It's sad that so many do it on purpose to piss people off. What kind of people take such glee in hurting a stranger?

And they love to gloat about it on threads like this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Of course the answer is no, the OP is not disputing that. He is merely asking why the message is being kept rather than just deleted.

If they get a lot of messages and don't look at messages often its like an infinity pool it goes over the edge and silently disappears "

I really like this analogy. Overstuffed inbox as infinity pool.

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By *erkshireBiCoupleCouple
over a year ago

Reading

So we sometimes read a message and don't reply straight away or delete.

Usually it's because we want each other to see it.

And we may be interested.

Maybe we are busy and haven't got round to it yet.

Some of the follow up messages are amusing

If only some folks had a little patience

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So we sometimes read a message and don't reply straight away or delete.

Usually it's because we want each other to see it.

And we may be interested.

Maybe we are busy and haven't got round to it yet.

Some of the follow up messages are amusing

If only some folks had a little patience "

same here. Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Steel - you, me and allabout can form the very tiny clique of Fabbers-with-manners

But what really blows my mind is why, rather than saying "good call, it's only a click", people find it more amusing to go to war over it!

It's sad that so many do it on purpose to piss people off. What kind of people take such glee in hurting a stranger?

And they love to gloat about it on threads like this. "

If people are so fragile they get hurt buy an unread or deleted message then they really shouldn't be here!!

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

Doesn't really make a difference does it? If they don't reply that's all that really matters.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is handy to put that. Alas I don't open most of my mail. Because I gravitate towards the forums, I do miss a lot of them.

I do put on my profile that I'm not meeting (even if it's a slight fib), so a message would be wasted on me though, so they know not to bother messaging

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I used to reply with a no thank you when not interested, I dont now partly because I get hundreds a day and party because in a lot of cases the guy takes " no thank you " as oh she replayed so I will keep messaging and see if I can persuade her, or get an aggressive reply. Its not bad manners not to reply, its bad manners to expect someone to reply to an unsolicited message. I'm not obligated to reply to anyone and don't expect to get abuse when I delete it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I used to reply with a no thank you when not interested, I dont now partly because I get hundreds a day and party because in a lot of cases the guy takes " no thank you " as oh she replayed so I will keep messaging and see if I can persuade her, or get an aggressive reply. Its not bad manners not to reply, its bad manners to expect someone to reply to an unsolicited message. I'm not obligated to reply to anyone and don't expect to get abuse when I delete it. "

^^^^^^^^ this is why we have blocked single guys!! Too many see manners as a come on!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

^^^^^^^^ this is why we have blocked single guys!! Too many see manners as a come on! "

Couldn't agree more.

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