FabSwingers.com forum: Verifying someone isn't compulsory?

By *ools and the brain OP Couple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

Is it?

We met a guy recently and he's moaning via status updates that we haven't verified him.

Now we neither liked not disliked him just not our cup of tea.

If we verified him it would not be good or bad but literally that he turned up and was genuine.

But surely we shouldn't feel obliged to verify someone simply because we met them?

Or are we totally out of order and missed the point and should verify him?

Like I said he did nothing wrong and was a nice enough guy just not for us.

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"Is it?

We met a guy recently and he's moaning via status updates that we haven't verified him.

Now we neither liked not disliked him just not our cup of tea.

If we verified him it would not be good or bad but literally that he turned up and was genuine.

But surely we shouldn't feel obliged to verify someone simply because we met them?

Or are we totally out of order and missed the point and should verify him?

Like I said he did nothing wrong and was a nice enough guy just not for us."

Only give a verie if you want to. It's not compulsory.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I have some dreadful veris which say I’m a shit shag and slightly better than a wank. Tell him he can have mine.

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By *inful xWoman
over a year ago

In a sleepy little village

No it's not compulsory but some people like them. If he hasn't had the decency to ask you directly for one but is moaning about it , I know what I'd do. Block him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You’ve said he was a pleasant chap just not your cup of tea, so do the guy a favour and verify him, (maybe he has none) after all he took the trouble to come and meet you both after no doubt jumping through hoops and was pleasant, can’t see the problem

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By *a Fee VerteWoman
over a year ago

Limbo

It's not compulsory but if someone was 'nice enough' (but not for me) I think I'd probably do something very generic like 'Met so and so for coffee. Polite guy, wish him well on Fab'. However, I certainly wouldn't do one if he was moaning about me publicly rather than asking privately. Bridges would have been burned by then!

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By *irty Flirty HarryMan
over a year ago

East Sussex

Surely verifying someone simply proves they are genuine. Most verys on here are reviews which they don't need to be.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The whole veri thing is a frigging minefield for us single guys. If you liked him and thought others might like him then maybe do him a favour, especially if it's his first veri. But it sounds like he's being a bit of an arse with his updates. So maybe don't. The way he's acting suggests he might not be a good guy to meet

I've had a few meets off here but agreed not to swap veris because they just feel too much like notches on the bedpost. I know this does me no favours as lots of people visiting my profile think I've only had a couple of socials at best. But tbh I think I'm going to carry on avoiding veris. It's really nobodies business who I have or haven't rolled around with.

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By *rimson_RoseWoman
over a year ago

Tamworth

"It's not compulsory but if someone was 'nice enough' (but not for me) I think I'd probably do something very generic like 'Met so and so for coffee. Polite guy, wish him well on Fab'. However, I certainly wouldn't do one if he was moaning about me publicly rather than asking privately. Bridges would have been burned by then!"

Totally agree!

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

No, of course you don't have to but if he's unverified I can understand him being miffed that you haven't left him one. That's no excuse for him behaving as he is. Yeah ~ I'd block him to, for being a bit of a dick!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This

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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago

Filthy Fuckeryville

I once got a veri (not asked for) from a social I held that simply said 'This is a genuine person'

You could just leave him something like that - esp if he is unverified as some guys do find it hard to meet and get verified, which in turn can help them meet others just by having that green tick.

The way I see it, although not compulsary, its no skin off your nose

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If he has taken time out to meet you and the meet was ok and he was a pleasant guy and caused you no bother, then I think a vari for him would be justified..you dont have to write war and peace. Just something like "reliable chap turned up as arranged"..then it's up to him if he wants to show it. But at least he has been verified

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You’ve said he was a pleasant chap just not your cup of tea, so do the guy a favour and verify him, (maybe he has none) after all he took the trouble to come and meet you both after no doubt jumping through hoops and was pleasant, can’t see the problem"

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

Suppose it shows how important they are to some men,lots of people won't meet a man if he's not verified so it can be hard for them.

For him to moan on a status though is a bit pathetic,I'd block him or write a veri saying what a moaning minnie he is and let him display that.

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By *ifty grades of shadyCouple
over a year ago

Carisbrooke, Isle of Wight

Leave him the veri if it is his first, as others have said, very basic. He won't have to show it if he doesn't like it, but it will at least help the guy out by having it in his summary

You haven't said if he's previously been veri'd, but if he hasn't, remember we all needed that someone to make the connection to kick things off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is that much pressure for single guys to get verified by others, especially if it's his first one ..every other profile states "will not meet if not verified"..I can see why he is pushing to get one from you guys..especially if he thinks the meet went ok and he kept to his part by turning up and so on

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By *aeBabeWoman
over a year ago

London

"Is it?

We met a guy recently and he's moaning via status updates that we haven't verified him.

Now we neither liked not disliked him just not our cup of tea.

If we verified him it would not be good or bad but literally that he turned up and was genuine.

But surely we shouldn't feel obliged to verify someone simply because we met them?

Or are we totally out of order and missed the point and should verify him?

Like I said he did nothing wrong and was a nice enough guy just not for us."

Probably would verify, not review.

"Pleasant guy, showed up when he said he would. All the best and happy swinging "

He'll stop after that.

If he still moans about his veri being crap, block and he will still have a green tick

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By *ngelina4uWoman
over a year ago

Camberley/Middleton

"Is it?

We met a guy recently and he's moaning via status updates that we haven't verified him.

Now we neither liked not disliked him just not our cup of tea.

If we verified him it would not be good or bad but literally that he turned up and was genuine.

But surely we shouldn't feel obliged to verify someone simply because we met them?

Or are we totally out of order and missed the point and should verify him?

Like I said he did nothing wrong and was a nice enough guy just not for us."

There is something I am guessing that says you don't want trouble by association and I get that happens I may be wrong but you do have reservations.

If in doubt then don't verify after all its your choice. If you feel you may regret doing it then don't. The last thing you should do is verify if you feel sorry for someone as the verification has to be as genuine as the guy is.

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By *ools and the brain OP Couple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

Thanks for replies advice taken and noted.

Have left a simple Veri for him and messaged explaing he's not Mrs type then blocked.

Can't be any fairer than that can we?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Verify that he is a whining little girl and block him

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By *anky_PankyWoman
over a year ago

Filthy Fuckeryville

"Thanks for replies advice taken and noted.

Have left a simple Veri for him and messaged explaing he's not Mrs type then blocked.

Can't be any fairer than that can we?"

He cannot read your veri if you've blocked him lol

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"If he has taken time out to meet you and the meet was ok and he was a pleasant guy and caused you no bother, then I think a vari for him would be justified..you dont have to write war and peace. Just something like "reliable chap turned up as arranged"..then it's up to him if he wants to show it. But at least he has been verified"

Exactly this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have some dreadful veris which say I’m a shit shag and slightly better than a wank. Tell him he can have mine. "

You got BETTER than a wank... you stud... wanna swap for my "like a bad vibrator with the other batteries"

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By *ifty grades of shadyCouple
over a year ago

Carisbrooke, Isle of Wight

"Thanks for replies advice taken and noted.

Have left a simple Veri for him and messaged explaing he's not Mrs type then blocked.

Can't be any fairer than that can we?

He cannot read your veri if you've blocked him lol "
but it will show as being verified and that would help him get other opportunities that as a non verified user (if that was the case) would otherwise be closed in some instances. In our opinion that is a good gesture on your part to do that. Much kudos to you both.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thanks for replies advice taken and noted.

Have left a simple Veri for him and messaged explaing he's not Mrs type then blocked.

Can't be any fairer than that can we?"

Probably the decent thing to do..nice one

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By *ools and the brain OP Couple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

So obviously some people can't take rejection.

We were extremely polite in our messages and Veri.

Yet he has taken it upon himself to start slagging us off on his status and we have been contacted by a verification/friend of ours that he has messaged them bad mouthing us and trying to cause trouble for us so now he has been reported.

I really don't get it !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You were lovely and did the guy a favour and he turned out to be a twat. Don't let it get to you. The only person it reflects badly on is him imo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So obviously some people can't take rejection.

We were extremely polite in our messages and Veri.

I really don't get it !!"

Thats why i think they should get rid of the verification crap. People can be nice then turn into arseholes and i'm talking from past experience.

Seriously who wants to know what anyone got up to end of rant lol.

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

"Thanks for replies advice taken and noted.

Have left a simple Veri for him and messaged explaing he's not Mrs type then blocked.

Can't be any fairer than that can we?

He cannot read your veri if you've blocked him lol "

Impressed, now that is one hell of a tease, brilliant, wish I’d thought of that.

Unblock him every now and then...

Masterful.

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By *istressZoeTV/TS
over a year ago

cheshire

I’d say if he has no verifications then give the guy a break x

Any verification proving he is genuine are better than none x

I’ve had some brilliant play dates with amazing people and left verifications and they have not been acknowledged x displayed x or returned x

But hey this fab and we are all grown ups x

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By *eady and Willing 9Man
over a year ago

Wherever the party is @

Well said

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So obviously some people can't take rejection.

We were extremely polite in our messages and Veri.

I really don't get it !!"

What a bloody fool.. he's got his veri..but obviously upset by the rejection..maybe he needs to see this forum post and it might cool him down

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it?

We met a guy recently and he's moaning via status updates that we haven't verified him.

Now we neither liked not disliked him just not our cup of tea.

If we verified him it would not be good or bad but literally that he turned up and was genuine.

But surely we shouldn't feel obliged to verify someone simply because we met them?

Or are we totally out of order and missed the point and should verify him?

Like I said he did nothing wrong and was a nice enough guy just not for us."

One of your veris is basic. You don't have to go into detail. I would leave him one but leave it short and sweet. Just because he wasn't for you doesn't mean he won't be for someone else

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By *ools and the brain OP Couple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

We did verify him.

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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago

Peterborough

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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago

hiding from cock pics

This is exactly how I feel too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it?

We met a guy recently and he's moaning via status updates that we haven't verified him.

Now we neither liked not disliked him just not our cup of tea.

If we verified him it would not be good or bad but literally that he turned up and was genuine.

But surely we shouldn't feel obliged to verify someone simply because we met them?

Or are we totally out of order and missed the point and should verify him?

Like I said he did nothing wrong and was a nice enough guy just not for us."

That is all verification does to me. Show the person was genuine and turned up.

When I read stuff like this guy was the best at giving me oral sex, he knows how to please a woman etc I take it all with a big pinch of salt. Just because one woman thought a guy was a great fuck doesn't mean I will.

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By *a Fee VerteWoman
over a year ago

Limbo

"So obviously some people can't take rejection.

We were extremely polite in our messages and Veri.

I really don't get it !!"

Oh dear, I see things have moved on. Sounds as if he had far too much invested in your opinion of him and/or far too high an opinion of himself. But his status rants won't have done him any favours, silly twat.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We would do a veri just so other users know they are real, turned up and weren't a total knob. It's a hard site for single males so the veri is more important to them.

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By *he riverdeep69Couple
over a year ago

North west ish

If he is being arsey, and it is not his first veri, then I would give him a truthful veri,including how he has reacted afterwards. In fact, I would be scathing, he wouldnt display it. If he is unverified just block cos he's a knob.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If he is being arsey, and it is not his first veri, then I would give him a truthful veri,including how he has reacted afterwards. In fact, I would be scathing, he wouldnt display it. If he is unverified just block cos he's a knob."

This. Surely they work both ways, to let others know what someone is like? Met as arranged, very polite. Cant handle rejection and behaves like a petulant child.

All the info there for the next person to make a decision based on the facts, or give him a wake up call to change his ways

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This. Surely they work both ways, to let others know what someone is like? Met as arranged, very polite. Cant handle rejection and behaves like a petulant child.

All the info there for the next person to make a decision based on the facts, or give him a wake up call to change his ways"

He would just hide the verifications though anyway so nobody would see the text from it..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This. Surely they work both ways, to let others know what someone is like? Met as arranged, very polite. Cant handle rejection and behaves like a petulant child.

All the info there for the next person to make a decision based on the facts, or give him a wake up call to change his ways

He would just hide the verifications though anyway so nobody would see the text from it.."

Couldnt grumble he didnt get one tho. Carefull what you wish for sometimes?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it?

We met a guy recently and he's moaning via status updates that we haven't verified him.

Now we neither liked not disliked him just not our cup of tea.

If we verified him it would not be good or bad but literally that he turned up and was genuine.

But surely we shouldn't feel obliged to verify someone simply because we met them?

Or are we totally out of order and missed the point and should verify him?

Like I said he did nothing wrong and was a nice enough guy just not for us."

I doubt that 1 in 20, if that high of our get togethers get verified.

Strangely we meet for the sex, not for a verification, are we missing out on a prize or something.

I would just block the fool.

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By *otYourUsualGirlWoman
over a year ago

Northampton

This is a really interesting thread - Love hearing about all your views.

I think a veri can be important to get people 'on the radar' of others. So I would always leave one.

I was really sad one of my recent meets didn't leave one. I will ask him about it - we get on well and I left him a really flattering one - I want one in return to bolster my ego

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