FabSwingers.com forum: Queen Of Spades Tattoo

By *imjayne OP Couple
over a year ago

Stafford

My hubby has suggested that because of my love of chocolate I should get a ‘Queen of Spades’ tattoo.

Bit unsure myself and think I might get a semi-permanent one to stay with.

Any others had one of these ?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *evaquitCouple
over a year ago

Catthorpe

Think you answered your own question there, semi permanent for now me thinks

Him

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By *imjayne OP Couple
over a year ago

Stafford

"Think you answered your own question there, semi permanent for now me thinks

Him "

You are right semi-permanent is probably the way to go.

Boobs or small of the back ?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

While in the scene and enjoying it , it seems like a great idea . However , like most things , the desire to swing will wane and if you get a permanent tattoo you’ll regret it .

Temporary , or not at all would be best I think .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would have it where people can see it, ankle or inner wrist

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Trashy

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By *rsTrellisWoman
over a year ago

Cambridge

“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo. "

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *eelouWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

[Removed by poster at 19/09/18 04:25:58]

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By *orney hunCouple
over a year ago

galway

yes my wife has tempory ace of spades lasts about a week and is waterproof she wears it just above her pussy as she has had lazor done and is smooth and hair free

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By *ldhillhotwifeCouple
over a year ago

Old Hill

Jayne, I had considered having mine for approximately 6 months before going ahead and to be honest considering how significant it is I don't think I was wrong to wait that long.

Its not a big tattoo but in the lifestyle marks you out but I am not sure the average person in the municpal swimming pool knows its meaning.

It feels very naughty having it out on nights out and I have not yet met a guy who thought it was anything other than horny. Which was a concern I had given some of the feedback.

I have mine on the small of my back, none of my tattoos are visible when I am at work and therefore the ankle was not an option although I did think boob was another possibility for placement.

Like all tattoos it's a commitment.

Sarah x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo. "

I respect your opinion.... but how is her decision to get a tattoo effecting your life or swinging experience?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My hubby has suggested that because of my love of chocolate I should get a ‘Queen of Spades’ tattoo.

Bit unsure myself and think I might get a semi-permanent one to stay with.

Any others had one of these ?"

Go with the semipermanent one..

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *rsTrellisWoman
over a year ago

Cambridge

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

I respect your opinion.... but how is her decision to get a tattoo effecting your life or swinging experience?"

Stereotypically black men have long been portrayed as hyper-sexualised, with out-of-control, animalistic sexuality. It’s a harmful stereotype.

It’s easy to see how demeaning the phrase “BBC” is if you switch it for a similar phrase:

“I want to meet a BBC tonight”

“I want to meet a massive pair of tits tonight”

“I fucked a massive pair of tits last week”

“I having a party full of massive pairs of tits”

Event the patronising phrase “BBW” at least acknowledges there’s a woman along with the big and beautiful. “Big black cock” reduces black men to a single, stereotypical feature.

And that brings me to “spade”. A racist term which is unacceptable in all arenas except, strangely, amongst some swingers, where white woman brand themselves the self-declared “Queen of Spades”.

Some men on Fab will play whatever cards they have to get sex and put up with a lot of shit. So some black men on Fab will tolerate, or even play down to, these stereotypes, claiming it’s a bit of fun and they’ve never minded (although I suspect that, if they were called a “spade” or “chocolate” at work or in a bar they’d suddenly remember how racist it is).

Racism should matter to all of us, black and white. I challenge it when I see it. It’s important to be a dissenting voice amongst people patting each other on the back and assuring each other that they “aren’t being racist, it’s just a bit of fun”.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

I respect your opinion.... but how is her decision to get a tattoo effecting your life or swinging experience?

Stereotypically black men have long been portrayed as hyper-sexualised, with out-of-control, animalistic sexuality. It’s a harmful stereotype.

It’s easy to see how demeaning the phrase “BBC” is if you switch it for a similar phrase:

“I want to meet a BBC tonight”

“I want to meet a massive pair of tits tonight”

“I fucked a massive pair of tits last week”

“I having a party full of massive pairs of tits”

Event the patronising phrase “BBW” at least acknowledges there’s a woman along with the big and beautiful. “Big black cock” reduces black men to a single, stereotypical feature.

Very well said. Makes you think.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ugs and JunkCouple
over a year ago

Bellshill

Agree as above, trashy and racially insensitive.

If you really feel you must get it, temporary or permanent don’t get it on your boobs as that’s as bad as a tramp stamp

Mrs

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

I respect your opinion.... but how is her decision to get a tattoo effecting your life or swinging experience?

Stereotypically black men have long been portrayed as hyper-sexualised, with out-of-control, animalistic sexuality. It’s a harmful stereotype.

It’s easy to see how demeaning the phrase “BBC” is if you switch it for a similar phrase:

“I want to meet a BBC tonight”

“I want to meet a massive pair of tits tonight”

“I fucked a massive pair of tits last week”

“I having a party full of massive pairs of tits”

Event the patronising phrase “BBW” at least acknowledges there’s a woman along with the big and beautiful. “Big black cock” reduces black men to a single, stereotypical feature.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *imjayne OP Couple
over a year ago

Stafford

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

I respect your opinion.... but how is her decision to get a tattoo effecting your life or swinging experience?

Stereotypically black men have long been portrayed as hyper-sexualised, with out-of-control, animalistic sexuality. It’s a harmful stereotype.

It’s easy to see how demeaning the phrase “BBC” is if you switch it for a similar phrase:

“I want to meet a BBC tonight”

“I want to meet a massive pair of tits tonight”

“I fucked a massive pair of tits last week”

“I having a party full of massive pairs of tits”

Event the patronising phrase “BBW” at least acknowledges there’s a woman along with the big and beautiful. “Big black cock” reduces black men to a single, stereotypical feature.

Very well said. Makes you think. "

Goodness me I only wanted an opinion on something me and hubby decussed as an Idea, I didn’t want a university style lecture.

Perhaps you should ask the guys that messsge us or we chat to on here to stop using BBC in their names or in their adverts.

At the end of the day this is a sex site and I thought that people do objectify themselves on here in order that they meet the right sort of people for the pleasure they want.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *.LBCouple
over a year ago

South

My wife contemplated having a permenant but opted against she wears semi perm to meets, personally I think that’s the way to go,

Good luck tho

(Him)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

*waits for the Caribbean/African men to step-up to this discussion*

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *rsTrellisWoman
over a year ago

Cambridge

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

I respect your opinion.... but how is her decision to get a tattoo effecting your life or swinging experience?

Stereotypically black men have long been portrayed as hyper-sexualised, with out-of-control, animalistic sexuality. It’s a harmful stereotype.

It’s easy to see how demeaning the phrase “BBC” is if you switch it for a similar phrase:

“I want to meet a BBC tonight”

“I want to meet a massive pair of tits tonight”

“I fucked a massive pair of tits last week”

“I having a party full of massive pairs of tits”

Event the patronising phrase “BBW” at least acknowledges there’s a woman along with the big and beautiful. “Big black cock” reduces black men to a single, stereotypical feature.

Very well said. Makes you think.

Goodness me I only wanted an opinion on something me and hubby decussed as an Idea, I didn’t want a university style lecture.

Perhaps you should ask the guys that messsge us or we chat to on here to stop using BBC in their names or in their adverts.

At the end of the day this is a sex site and I thought that people do objectify themselves on here in order that they meet the right sort of people for the pleasure they want."

You asked for an opinion and I’ve given you one. You’ll undoubtedly find people willing to give you the opinion you want.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ldhillhotwifeCouple
over a year ago

Old Hill

Or the opinion they have... can't people have that as well if they disagree with you?

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By *rsTrellisWoman
over a year ago

Cambridge

"*waits for the Caribbean/African men to step-up to this discussion*"

A couple of black men have commented.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My opinion would be it's your body your decision. Never ask opinions on the forum if you're looking for some sort of validation.

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By *imjayne OP Couple
over a year ago

Stafford

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

I respect your opinion.... but how is her decision to get a tattoo effecting your life or swinging experience?

Stereotypically black men have long been portrayed as hyper-sexualised, with out-of-control, animalistic sexuality. It’s a harmful stereotype.

It’s easy to see how demeaning the phrase “BBC” is if you switch it for a similar phrase:

“I want to meet a BBC tonight”

“I want to meet a massive pair of tits tonight”

“I fucked a massive pair of tits last week”

“I having a party full of massive pairs of tits”

Event the patronising phrase “BBW” at least acknowledges there’s a woman along with the big and beautiful. “Big black cock” reduces black men to a single, stereotypical feature.

Very well said. Makes you think.

Goodness me I only wanted an opinion on something me and hubby decussed as an Idea, I didn’t want a university style lecture.

Perhaps you should ask the guys that messsge us or we chat to on here to stop using BBC in their names or in their adverts.

At the end of the day this is a sex site and I thought that people do objectify themselves on here in order that they meet the right sort of people for the pleasure they want.

You asked for an opinion and I’ve given you one. You’ll undoubtedly find people willing to give you the opinion you want. "

Actually I asked for an opinion if I had a tattoo if it should be permanent or semi permanent and if anyone else had one, what their thoughts were ?

I didn’t ask for an opinion if I was a racist or not, which by using the word chocolate you seem to seem to deem me as being !

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *rsTrellisWoman
over a year ago

Cambridge

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

I respect your opinion.... but how is her decision to get a tattoo effecting your life or swinging experience?

Stereotypically black men have long been portrayed as hyper-sexualised, with out-of-control, animalistic sexuality. It’s a harmful stereotype.

It’s easy to see how demeaning the phrase “BBC” is if you switch it for a similar phrase:

“I want to meet a BBC tonight”

“I want to meet a massive pair of tits tonight”

“I fucked a massive pair of tits last week”

“I having a party full of massive pairs of tits”

Event the patronising phrase “BBW” at least acknowledges there’s a woman along with the big and beautiful. “Big black cock” reduces black men to a single, stereotypical feature.

Very well said. Makes you think.

Goodness me I only wanted an opinion on something me and hubby decussed as an Idea, I didn’t want a university style lecture.

Perhaps you should ask the guys that messsge us or we chat to on here to stop using BBC in their names or in their adverts.

At the end of the day this is a sex site and I thought that people do objectify themselves on here in order that they meet the right sort of people for the pleasure they want.

You asked for an opinion and I’ve given you one. You’ll undoubtedly find people willing to give you the opinion you want.

Actually I asked for an opinion if I had a tattoo if it should be permanent or semi permanent and if anyone else had one, what their thoughts were ?

I didn’t ask for an opinion if I was a racist or not, which by using the word chocolate you seem to seem to deem me as being !"

I deem you racist for more that just your use of the word chocolate.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"*waits for the Caribbean/African men to step-up to this discussion*

A couple of black men have commented.

I'm sure there are many more watching the thread and reading.... Please comment guys! It's your opinion I'M interested in!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *imjayne OP Couple
over a year ago

Stafford

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

I respect your opinion.... but how is her decision to get a tattoo effecting your life or swinging experience?

Stereotypically black men have long been portrayed as hyper-sexualised, with out-of-control, animalistic sexuality. It’s a harmful stereotype.

It’s easy to see how demeaning the phrase “BBC” is if you switch it for a similar phrase:

“I want to meet a BBC tonight”

“I want to meet a massive pair of tits tonight”

“I fucked a massive pair of tits last week”

“I having a party full of massive pairs of tits”

Event the patronising phrase “BBW” at least acknowledges there’s a woman along with the big and beautiful. “Big black cock” reduces black men to a single, stereotypical feature.

Very well said. Makes you think.

Goodness me I only wanted an opinion on something me and hubby decussed as an Idea, I didn’t want a university style lecture.

Perhaps you should ask the guys that messsge us or we chat to on here to stop using BBC in their names or in their adverts.

At the end of the day this is a sex site and I thought that people do objectify themselves on here in order that they meet the right sort of people for the pleasure they want.

You asked for an opinion and I’ve given you one. You’ll undoubtedly find people willing to give you the opinion you want.

Actually I asked for an opinion if I had a tattoo if it should be permanent or semi permanent and if anyone else had one, what their thoughts were ?

I didn’t ask for an opinion if I was a racist or not, which by using the word chocolate you seem to seem to deem me as being !

I deem you racist for more that just your use of the word chocolate. "

Please elaborate and enlighten me.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just to add a little humour to this thread....

My teenage Daughter picked up a t.shirt from a charity shop and it read BBC on the front and CREW on the back. Obviously I thought of the black men and not the telly channel, so unfortunately I was caught off guard for what to say! So instead of saying you can't have it, I said don't wear it outside.... I was never questioned why!

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By *imjayne OP Couple
over a year ago

Stafford

"Just to add a little humour to this thread....

Which charity shop was that ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just to add a little humour to this thread....

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *rsTrellisWoman
over a year ago

Cambridge

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

I respect your opinion.... but how is her decision to get a tattoo effecting your life or swinging experience?

Stereotypically black men have long been portrayed as hyper-sexualised, with out-of-control, animalistic sexuality. It’s a harmful stereotype.

It’s easy to see how demeaning the phrase “BBC” is if you switch it for a similar phrase:

“I want to meet a BBC tonight”

“I want to meet a massive pair of tits tonight”

“I fucked a massive pair of tits last week”

“I having a party full of massive pairs of tits”

Event the patronising phrase “BBW” at least acknowledges there’s a woman along with the big and beautiful. “Big black cock” reduces black men to a single, stereotypical feature.

Very well said. Makes you think.

Goodness me I only wanted an opinion on something me and hubby decussed as an Idea, I didn’t want a university style lecture.

Perhaps you should ask the guys that messsge us or we chat to on here to stop using BBC in their names or in their adverts.

At the end of the day this is a sex site and I thought that people do objectify themselves on here in order that they meet the right sort of people for the pleasure they want.

You asked for an opinion and I’ve given you one. You’ll undoubtedly find people willing to give you the opinion you want.

Actually I asked for an opinion if I had a tattoo if it should be permanent or semi permanent and if anyone else had one, what their thoughts were ?

I didn’t ask for an opinion if I was a racist or not, which by using the word chocolate you seem to seem to deem me as being !

I deem you racist for more that just your use of the word chocolate.

Please elaborate and enlighten me."

I’m beginning to see why a “university style lecture” was daunting for you.

1) use of the word chocolate to describe black men

2) willingness to consider a queen of spades tattoo

3) no objection to the use of BBC to describe black men

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *imjayne OP Couple
over a year ago

Stafford

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

I respect your opinion.... but how is her decision to get a tattoo effecting your life or swinging experience?

Stereotypically black men have long been portrayed as hyper-sexualised, with out-of-control, animalistic sexuality. It’s a harmful stereotype.

It’s easy to see how demeaning the phrase “BBC” is if you switch it for a similar phrase:

“I want to meet a BBC tonight”

“I want to meet a massive pair of tits tonight”

“I fucked a massive pair of tits last week”

“I having a party full of massive pairs of tits”

Event the patronising phrase “BBW” at least acknowledges there’s a woman along with the big and beautiful. “Big black cock” reduces black men to a single, stereotypical feature.

Very well said. Makes you think.

Goodness me I only wanted an opinion on something me and hubby decussed as an Idea, I didn’t want a university style lecture.

Perhaps you should ask the guys that messsge us or we chat to on here to stop using BBC in their names or in their adverts.

At the end of the day this is a sex site and I thought that people do objectify themselves on here in order that they meet the right sort of people for the pleasure they want.

You asked for an opinion and I’ve given you one. You’ll undoubtedly find people willing to give you the opinion you want.

Actually I asked for an opinion if I had a tattoo if it should be permanent or semi permanent and if anyone else had one, what their thoughts were ?

I didn’t ask for an opinion if I was a racist or not, which by using the word chocolate you seem to seem to deem me as being !

I deem you racist for more that just your use of the word chocolate.

Please elaborate and enlighten me.

I’m beginning to see why a “university style lecture” was daunting for you.

1) use of the word chocolate to describe black men

2) willingness to consider a queen of spades tattoo

3) no objection to the use of BBC to describe black men

Oh well, that’s it I am a racist then.

No more big black cocks for me in the future, I will have find another way to spend my spare time !

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just to add a little humour to this thread....

Which charity shop was that ?

Think it was the heart foundation in Blackburn..

I did wear it once, to play with a mixed race guy... Plus take a pic of it for my profile. This was years ago though..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No race should be ridiculed in this way it's wrong

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By *igblackdomTV/TS
over a year ago

West Midlands

"*waits for the Caribbean/African men to step-up to this discussion*

A couple of black men have commented.

I'm sure there are many more watching the thread and reading.... Please comment guys! It's your opinion I'M interested in! "

Apologies to the OP for straying from the subject matter but I share the view of others and regard the phrases BBC and Queen of Spades as deplorable.

I grew up in a time when to be called a spade as a black male was just as bad as being called the N word, I guarantee QoS is not the invention of any black man!

I used to be very active in this lifestyle (20 odd years ago!) but my interest wanted when I came to realise that whilst the 'black cock obsession' had certain benefits it came to trivialise me as a human being.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *imjayne OP Couple
over a year ago

Stafford

"Just to add a little humour to this thread....

Which charity shop was that ?

Think it was the heart foundation in Blackburn..

I did wear it once, to play with a mixed race guy... Plus take a pic of it for my profile. This was years ago though.. "

I know what the poster is saying about racism but we get so many messages from guys advertising as BBC or chocolate love, it’s ok for them to do it but if I say the same words I am suddenly deemed a racist ?

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By *igblackdomTV/TS
over a year ago

West Midlands

Oh well, that’s it I am a racist then.

No more big black cocks for me in the future, I will have find another way to spend my spare time !"

Where does your interest lie, with big black cocks or big black men?

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By *imjayne OP Couple
over a year ago

Stafford

Oh well, that’s it I am a racist then.

No more big black cocks for me in the future, I will have find another way to spend my spare time !

Where does your interest lie, with big black cocks or big black men? "

From experience they tend to go hand in hand x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just to add a little humour to this thread....

Which charity shop was that ?

Think it was the heart foundation in Blackburn..

I did wear it once, to play with a mixed race guy... Plus take a pic of it for my profile. This was years ago though..

In my mind its only racist IF that particular party are against it!

That's why I've asked those to comment. I can only see one guy who has.... BTW have semi permanent - YOU might not sleep with black men for the rest of your life! x

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *igblackdomTV/TS
over a year ago

West Midlands

You (and they) can do what you like, I think people contributing to this thread are expressing their own opinion.

To be honest I used to play on the whole BBC thing until I came to realise it's tedious, boring and subversive in terms of what it says about mankind, other black men will use it to get a quick shag, that's their business but it's not for me.

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By *ugs and JunkCouple
over a year ago

Bellshill

Oh well, that’s it I am a racist then.

No more big black cocks for me in the future, I will have find another way to spend my spare time !

Where does your interest lie, with big black cocks or big black men?

From experience they tend to go hand in hand x"

More stereotyping

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By *ldhillhotwifeCouple
over a year ago

Old Hill

What that black men have black cocks... Seriously they do.

I like black men and cock (which is subsequently black).

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By *imjayne OP Couple
over a year ago

Stafford

You (and they) can do what you like, I think people contributing to this thread are expressing their own opinion.

I know what you are saying but to be fair you use the words big black in your name title knowing that will attract a certain type of people, I doubt there are many members who use the words big white in their name title x

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By *imjayne OP Couple
over a year ago

Stafford

Oh well, that’s it I am a racist then.

No more big black cocks for me in the future, I will have find another way to spend my spare time !

Where does your interest lie, with big black cocks or big black men?

From experience they tend to go hand in hand x

More stereotyping

I used the word experience, perhaps I have just been lucky in that the well endowed guys I have met are big built too x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You (and they) can do what you like, I think people contributing to this thread are expressing their own opinion.

Yes this ^

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's good to have an opinion on a thread as long as it doesn't get personal and judgemental.

I think the lady has been through enough to be honest.

Hope you've got some good feedback, you was asking for. Take care hunny x

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By *tella HeelsTV/TS
over a year ago

west here ford shire

If you want the tattoo it’s up to you, it seems to me it’s your husband who wants to mark you as available to bbc

Which I think is a little racist, that may offend it’s not intended to, my point here is why do you need a mark to let others know???

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

[Removed by poster at 19/09/18 08:06:32]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just curious, if the spade design with the Q in it, is a symbol to emphasise that persons desire for black men, what is the symbol or design to show a desire for short white men with average(ish) cocks, that have a bit of a podgy tummy?

Asking for a friend obviously?

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By *igblackdomTV/TS
over a year ago

West Midlands

My username is descriptive.

I'm big (over 18 stones)

I'm black (that's indisputable)

..my name's Dominic.

Im a big, black MAN, not a big black COCK, it's interesting some folks are unable to discern the difference!

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By *iReyWoman
over a year ago

Cheshire East

Christ how racist can you get? Just because you love fucking black men doesn't mean you're not racist, which with your use of the word chocolate and wanting a queen of spades tattoo, you clearly are

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This has been great food for thought for me x

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By *imjayne OP Couple
over a year ago

Stafford

My username is descriptive.

I'm big (over 18 stones)

I'm black (that's indisputable)

..my name's Dominic.

Im a big, black MAN, not a big black COCK, it's interesting some folks are unable to discern the difference!"

Why even call yourself big black, surely you know that people will make assumptions from it, it’s almost as if you want the attention but want to keep the moral high ground.

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By *entralscotscpl7Couple
over a year ago

Falkirk

My username is descriptive.

I'm big (over 18 stones)

I'm black (that's indisputable)

..my name's Dominic.

Im a big, black MAN, not a big black COCK, it's interesting some folks are unable to discern the difference!"

One of the best answers on the forum

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By *igblackdomTV/TS
over a year ago

West Midlands

My username is descriptive.

I'm big (over 18 stones)

I'm black (that's indisputable)

..my name's Dominic.

Im a big, black MAN, not a big black COCK, it's interesting some folks are unable to discern the difference!

Why even call yourself big black, surely you know that people will make assumptions from it, it’s almost as if you want the attention but want to keep the moral high ground.

Despite the common view there are many women/couples here who don't want to meet black men. Including it in my username reduces contact from them.

It also does attract people who have an interest in black men, don't think I've suggested I've any problem with that.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *.LBCouple
over a year ago

South

That escalated quickly

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By *igblackdomTV/TS
over a year ago

West Midlands

"I doubt there are many members who use the words big white in their name title x"

Name search will address that assumption.

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By *good-being-badMan
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

Instead of a permanent tattoo ..why not get an ankle chain or necklace see if it's what you want they're easily removed ...if so then go for the permanent tattoo..

I don't have any tattoos I have always thought that no tattoo improves on the natural beauty of the human body.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo. "

Another one on their moral high ground been on 10 months no veri's and dictates to others got to love them (not) go with the semi permanent and see how you feel xx

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

Another one on their moral high ground been on 10 months no veri's and dictates to others got to love them (not) go with the semi permanent and see how you feel xx"

She is verified.

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By *iReyWoman
over a year ago

Cheshire East

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

Another one on their moral high ground been on 10 months no veri's and dictates to others got to love them (not) go with the semi permanent and see how you feel xx"

So does being verified mean your opinion is more important than those without any?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you love black men that much why marry a white man

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

Another one on their moral high ground been on 10 months no veri's and dictates to others got to love them (not) go with the semi permanent and see how you feel xx

She is verified. "

Strange just checked her profile

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

Another one on their moral high ground been on 10 months no veri's and dictates to others got to love them (not) go with the semi permanent and see how you feel xx

She is verified.

Strange just checked her profile"

And she has a green tick which means she's verified. Not everyone chooses to display them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

I respect your opinion.... but how is her decision to get a tattoo effecting your life or swinging experience?

Stereotypically black men have long been portrayed as hyper-sexualised, with out-of-control, animalistic sexuality. It’s a harmful stereotype.

It’s easy to see how demeaning the phrase “BBC” is if you switch it for a similar phrase:

“I want to meet a BBC tonight”

“I want to meet a massive pair of tits tonight”

“I fucked a massive pair of tits last week”

“I having a party full of massive pairs of tits”

Event the patronising phrase “BBW” at least acknowledges there’s a woman along with the big and beautiful. “Big black cock” reduces black men to a single, stereotypical feature.

Spot on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

Another one on their moral high ground been on 10 months no veri's and dictates to others got to love them (not) go with the semi permanent and see how you feel xx

She is verified.

Strange just checked her profile

And she has a green tick which means she's verified. Not everyone chooses to display them. "

Everyone has there own kinks and desires and others are too quick to jump on them for that who are we to judge just think you should all live and let live - as a wise man once said - before you point your fingers make sure your hands are clean

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

Another one on their moral high ground been on 10 months no veri's and dictates to others got to love them (not) go with the semi permanent and see how you feel xx

She is verified.

Strange just checked her profile

And she has a green tick which means she's verified. Not everyone chooses to display them.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *rsTrellisWoman
over a year ago

Cambridge

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

Another one on their moral high ground been on 10 months no veri's and dictates to others got to love them (not) go with the semi permanent and see how you feel xx

She is verified.

Strange just checked her profile

And she has a green tick which means she's verified. Not everyone chooses to display them.

There we go. Verification summary displayed. Not sure how you think my verifications will validate or discredit my point.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *rsTrellisWoman
over a year ago

Cambridge

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

I respect your opinion.... but how is her decision to get a tattoo effecting your life or swinging experience?

Stereotypically black men have long been portrayed as hyper-sexualised, with out-of-control, animalistic sexuality. It’s a harmful stereotype.

It’s easy to see how demeaning the phrase “BBC” is if you switch it for a similar phrase:

“I want to meet a BBC tonight”

“I want to meet a massive pair of tits tonight”

“I fucked a massive pair of tits last week”

“I having a party full of massive pairs of tits”

Event the patronising phrase “BBW” at least acknowledges there’s a woman along with the big and beautiful. “Big black cock” reduces black men to a single, stereotypical feature.

Spot on

Thanks x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

I respect your opinion.... but how is her decision to get a tattoo effecting your life or swinging experience?

Stereotypically black men have long been portrayed as hyper-sexualised, with out-of-control, animalistic sexuality. It’s a harmful stereotype.

It’s easy to see how demeaning the phrase “BBC” is if you switch it for a similar phrase:

“I want to meet a BBC tonight”

“I want to meet a massive pair of tits tonight”

“I fucked a massive pair of tits last week”

“I having a party full of massive pairs of tits”

Event the patronising phrase “BBW” at least acknowledges there’s a woman along with the big and beautiful. “Big black cock” reduces black men to a single, stereotypical feature.

well said.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *dores blackmenWoman
over a year ago

incognito mode ;-)

My username is descriptive.

I'm big (over 18 stones)

I'm black (that's indisputable)

..my name's Dominic.

Im a big, black MAN, not a big black COCK, it's interesting some folks are unable to discern the difference!

Why even call yourself big black, surely you know that people will make assumptions from it, it’s almost as if you want the attention but want to keep the moral high ground.

Despite the common view there are many women/couples here who don't want to meet black men. Including it in my username reduces contact from them.

It also does attract people who have an interest in black men, don't think I've suggested I've any problem with that."

My name is a female version,a great filter to have

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ifty grades of shadyCouple
over a year ago

Carisbrooke, Isle of Wight

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

I respect your opinion.... but how is her decision to get a tattoo effecting your life or swinging experience?

Stereotypically black men have long been portrayed as hyper-sexualised, with out-of-control, animalistic sexuality. It’s a harmful stereotype.

It’s easy to see how demeaning the phrase “BBC” is if you switch it for a similar phrase:

“I want to meet a BBC tonight”

“I want to meet a massive pair of tits tonight”

“I fucked a massive pair of tits last week”

“I having a party full of massive pairs of tits”

Event the patronising phrase “BBW” at least acknowledges there’s a woman along with the big and beautiful. “Big black cock” reduces black men to a single, stereotypical feature.

Very well said. Makes you think.

Goodness me I only wanted an opinion on something me and hubby decussed as an Idea, I didn’t want a university style lecture.

Perhaps you should ask the guys that messsge us or we chat to on here to stop using BBC in their names or in their adverts.

At the end of the day this is a sex site and I thought that people do objectify themselves on here in order that they meet the right sort of people for the pleasure they want.

You asked for an opinion and I’ve given you one. You’ll undoubtedly find people willing to give you the opinion you want.

Actually I asked for an opinion if I had a tattoo if it should be permanent or semi permanent and if anyone else had one, what their thoughts were ?

I didn’t ask for an opinion if I was a racist or not, which by using the word chocolate you seem to seem to deem me as being !

I deem you racist for more that just your use of the word chocolate.

Please elaborate and enlighten me.

I’m beginning to see why a “university style lecture” was daunting for you.

1) use of the word chocolate to describe black men

2) willingness to consider a queen of spades tattoo

3) no objection to the use of BBC to describe black men

Oh well, that’s it I am a racist then.

No more big black cocks for me in the future, I will have find another way to spend my spare time !"
get a snowflake one instead....

Seriously get what makes you happy, and let other people filter you for it either way.

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By *igblackdomTV/TS
over a year ago

West Midlands

My username is descriptive.

I'm big (over 18 stones)

I'm black (that's indisputable)

..my name's Dominic.

Im a big, black MAN, not a big black COCK, it's interesting some folks are unable to discern the difference!

Why even call yourself big black, surely you know that people will make assumptions from it, it’s almost as if you want the attention but want to keep the moral high ground.

Despite the common view there are many women/couples here who don't want to meet black men. Including it in my username reduces contact from them.

It also does attract people who have an interest in black men, don't think I've suggested I've any problem with that.

My name is a female version,a great filter to have

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *igblackdomTV/TS
over a year ago

West Midlands

"get a snowflake one instead...."

Oh dear

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Trashy"

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *igblackdomTV/TS
over a year ago

West Midlands

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

Another one on their moral high ground been on 10 months no veri's and dictates to others got to love them (not) go with the semi permanent and see how you feel xx

She is verified.

Strange just checked her profile

And she has a green tick which means she's verified. Not everyone chooses to display them.

There we go. Verification summary displayed. Not sure how you think my verifications will validate or discredit my point. "

Haha, brilliant..that teld them!!

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By *ifty grades of shadyCouple
over a year ago

Carisbrooke, Isle of Wight

"get a snowflake one instead....

Oh dear

"
it's called irony fella, like I said she should get what she wants. And snowflake is a term currently used in social media that has absolutely no racist connects to the 60's, 70's & 80`s view of race.

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

I respect your opinion.... but how is her decision to get a tattoo effecting your life or swinging experience?

Stereotypically black men have long been portrayed as hyper-sexualised, with out-of-control, animalistic sexuality. It’s a harmful stereotype.

It’s easy to see how demeaning the phrase “BBC” is if you switch it for a similar phrase:

“I want to meet a BBC tonight”

“I want to meet a massive pair of tits tonight”

“I fucked a massive pair of tits last week”

“I having a party full of massive pairs of tits”

Event the patronising phrase “BBW” at least acknowledges there’s a woman along with the big and beautiful. “Big black cock” reduces black men to a single, stereotypical feature.

Hit the nail on the head. I cringe when I see the term 'chocolate' used.

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

I don't the issue is what anyone's kinks are it's how they choose to describe them.

The OPs thread has been derailed but some interesting points made, particularly by MrsTrellis.

I'm a black man and find the term 'spade', highly offensive and don't believe my right to articulate that should be subverted by the misuse of language because of someone's fetish.

The OP can say what they want, they can also articulate their preference for black men without resorting to questionable language.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm a black man and find the term 'spade', highly offensive and don't believe my right to articulate that should be subverted by the misuse of language because of someone's fetish.

I've been waiting for someone else to say this for a very long time.

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

Swinging is different things to different people .

Terminology will be interpreted by different people in different ways .

If a woman is looking for a well endowed black guy , I can’t see why she can’t ask for a BBC .

Any more than I can’t see the problem with using the word chocolate to describe a colour , because that’s what it is .

Queen of spades as a tattoo to show a woman’s love of black guys is questionable regarding the racial connotations , but only if you want to be offended by it . It merely suggests that the wearer is a hotwife who loves sex with black men .

This thread shows once again why so few people as a % use the forum . Why would they when they get torn to shreds over something as trivial as this ? She only asked whether she should have a permanent or temporary tattoo , and who had one .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ffs this has got a bit out of hand.

Go on any porn site/sex site and without question there are genres/sections/titles called 'BBC' or 'QOS'. Like it or not.

I don't see how 'BBC'is racist. If you are looking for 'Big Black Cock'then what are you supposed to type???

Is the term 'Snow Bunny' not racist either? (Snow bunny is also a 'thing' to describe white women fucking black men).

This just shows up the kind of snow flake society we live in nowadays.

You go for it girl! If it's what you and your husband want and like then don't let anyone put you off. Get the semi permanent one, see how you like it and enjoy all that BBC you're gonna get

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Go back a handful of generations and the N-word or the D-word would've been casually tossed about. These days you wouldn't dream of it. In generations to come, I expect the S-word will go the same way. Just as these days a woman wouldn't get a "N- fucker" tattoo, I would hope our successors would express similar outrage to a QoS mark.

Spade is a derogatory term, whether an individual accepts it or not. Try going out into the street and throwing that word into casual conversation - see how far you get before skulls are cracked.

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury

Might be weird when you're 80.

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Ffs this has got a bit out of hand.

Go on any porn site/sex site and without question there are genres/sections/titles called 'BBC' or 'QOS'. Like it or not.

I don't see how 'BBC'is racist. If you are looking for 'Big Black Cock'then what are you supposed to type???

Is the term 'Snow Bunny' not racist either? (Snow bunny is also a 'thing' to describe white women fucking black men).

This just shows up the kind of snow flake society we live in nowadays.

You go for it girl! If it's what you and your husband want and like then don't let anyone put you off. Get the semi permanent one, see how you like it and enjoy all that BBC you're gonna get

Thanks for that stunning insight.

The fact you reference the use of these terms on porn sites doesnt validate them, in fact highlights a rather sad reflection on mankind that such words have commercial benefits.

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Try going out into the street and throwing that word into casual conversation - see how far you get before skulls are cracked."

It's astonishing this needs explaining.

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

" . Why would they when they get torn to shreds over something as trivial as this ? "

Just as interesting is that the use of the word 'spade' to describe black men is considered trivial and those who have suggested it's an offensive term are also 'torn to shreds'.

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

Sorry for the social history lecture but the Big Black Dick is actually a racist stereotype that has its origins in the African slave trade.

It suited the racist agenda of white slave traders and slave owners to portray black men as more primitive and bestial than white men, and one way to do this was to promote the belief that they were all promiscuous and insatiable sexual predators - and therefore posed a danger to all white women and the (uptight, neurotic) sexual morality of decent, white, Christian society of the time.

And one way to do this was to spread rumours that all black men had abnormally large penises (because of course an over-sized libido implies an over-sized penis, right?).

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

"get a snowflake one instead....

Oh dear

it's called irony fella, like I said she should get what she wants. And snowflake is a term currently used in social media that has absolutely no racist connects to the 60's, 70's & 80`s view of race. "

It's contemporary use was adopted by the alt.right to deride out of hand, any criticism from people who disagree with their agenda, akin to the irrelevant use of such phrases as 'playing the race card', 'pc brigade' etc which are often employed to derail debate and open thinking.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All this talk about objectification, and in my sleep addled, full of cold brain it too me the longest time to work out what "queen of spades" had to do with "chocolate", as in the confectionery...

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

" . Why would they when they get torn to shreds over something as trivial as this ?

Just as interesting is that the use of the word 'spade' to describe black men is considered trivial and those who have suggested it's an offensive term are also 'torn to shreds'."

To put it into context , the Queen of Spades is a simple and effective way for a woman who likes to have black guys owning her sexually to show this like . She isn’t saying that she sees them as lower beings to herself or anyone else , quite the opposite ! She adores them , and I know you could say that her objectification is wrong , but no more than anyone else who has any preference on here . That’s a different story .

The racial slur that ‘could’ be attributed to the term is long past . I have never heard anyone use it in my 58 years , and I lived in the Home Counties during my school days and Hyson Green in Nottingham for seven years in my twenties . Both areas having a very high black population , and many of my friends were blacks and Asians .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

I respect your opinion.... but how is her decision to get a tattoo effecting your life or swinging experience?

Stereotypically black men have long been portrayed as hyper-sexualised, with out-of-control, animalistic sexuality. It’s a harmful stereotype.

It’s easy to see how demeaning the phrase “BBC” is if you switch it for a similar phrase:

“I want to meet a BBC tonight”

“I want to meet a massive pair of tits tonight”

“I fucked a massive pair of tits last week”

“I having a party full of massive pairs of tits”

Event the patronising phrase “BBW” at least acknowledges there’s a woman along with the big and beautiful. “Big black cock” reduces black men to a single, stereotypical feature.

Can I get an invite to the Massive pair of tits party please?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *oreLifeMan
over a year ago

london

Its not that serious guys !!! Chill!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London

" . Why would they when they get torn to shreds over something as trivial as this ?

Just as interesting is that the use of the word 'spade' to describe black men is considered trivial and those who have suggested it's an offensive term are also 'torn to shreds'.

Say you were looking for a friend in a pub and couldn't see him. Your friend is black and you ask the barman if he has seen him. The barman asks what he looks like. You'd think there would be no problem saying "he's a spade"?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

" . Why would they when they get torn to shreds over something as trivial as this ?

Just as interesting is that the use of the word 'spade' to describe black men is considered trivial and those who have suggested it's an offensive term are also 'torn to shreds'.

That's absolutely fine, but perhaps irrelevant to the current theme.

I can't comment on how your friends from Hyson Green might view these terms, I can only provide my own insight as a middle aged black male who was the subject of such terminology during the 60's, 70's and 80's, the fact you don't agree with what I say doesn't invalidate it.

Incidentally, as others have done, you're conflating my dislike of the terms BBC, Queen of Spades etc with a dislike of people's right to express a racial preference.

Just so I'm clear my objection is to the terms being used to describe that preference!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *oshker71Man
over a year ago

Cardiff

"Its not that serious guys !!! Chill! "

I was thinking the same thing...mountain out of a mole hill springs to mind

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Its not that serious guys !!!"

Given the contributions to this thread and the myriad of other threads on similar lines it obviously is!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can you not get a queen of spades necklace instead OP that way you can take it off when not meeting and for work etc I personally think its a derogitory (sic) term but each to their own and if the men you meet dont mind then fair play

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *arkside2698Man
over a year ago

luton

I personally find the whole QoS disgusting and racist. I get we have our preferences but nine times out of ten the people seeking to use a black man for their weekend self gratification, before returning to respectable white suburbia, are white couples. If the lady likes black men that much, why didn't she marry one? This reinforces the belief or concept that black men are only good for one thing IMO. What about treating people as people on their own merits and not skin colour?

That said, I do think the tattoo is a good idea but should be somewhere visible, like the forehead. That way at least the normal folk can see the shallow, covert racist people from a distance and save them the bother of communicating...

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By *urved HunnyWoman
over a year ago

Essex

I think you should do whatever you like tattoo wise but as a friend and playmate to a few beautiful black men, many say "Thank God you don't have one of those awful Queen of Spades tattoos" I've even been asked prior to meets

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Its not that serious guys !!! Chill!

I was thinking the same thing...mountain out of a mole hill springs to mind

Sadly it's views like this that perpetuate social injustice and inequality, you're sounding like good ol' Uncle Tom (ps hopefully you'll appreciate the irony in that statement)

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Think you answered your own question there, semi permanent for now me thinks

Him

You are right semi-permanent is probably the way to go.

Boobs or small of the back ?"

boobs are gorgeous and should be tattoo free,

small of your back no one will ever see

don't bother , it wont change your life

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *igblackdomTV/TS
over a year ago

West Midlands

" If the lady likes black men that much, why didn't she marry one? This reinforces the belief or concept that black men are only good for one thing IMO. "

This is the main reason I stopped playing..during an evening with a white couple I'd had many encounters with and regarded as friends, the male innocently explained that their preference for black males was that his wife would 'never run away with one'.

My grievous side did hope she left him and ran away to the circus with a bearded lady from Nigeria.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *rongstantineWoman
over a year ago

hull

" If the lady likes black men that much, why didn't she marry one? This reinforces the belief or concept that black men are only good for one thing IMO.

My grievous side did hope she left him and ran away to the circus with a bearded lady from Nigeria."

I like your grievous side.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *oreLifeMan
over a year ago

london

I’m far from an “Uncle Tom. “

The thing is.. the majority of people complaining about this is WHITE in this group.

White people can not determine what is racist when it concerns a black person.

What white people call racist and what black people call racist is two different things. BBC, QOS doesn’t hurt anyone.

BLack guys are not REALLY offended about “BBC “ title AND they are DEFINITELY not turning down any sex.

Real racism is a every day thing we face living our daily lives. Going to work, trying to get a job, trying to win a business contract, asking for directions lol.

Think about it ...

Chill out.

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By *urved HunnyWoman
over a year ago

Essex

" If the lady likes black men that much, why didn't she marry one? This reinforces the belief or concept that black men are only good for one thing IMO.

My grievous side did hope she left him and ran away to the circus with a bearded lady from Nigeria."

Lool me too hahaha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Semi-permanent I think

Having had tattoos in the past a regretted it to the point I’ve had laser treatment then don’t do it.

I really wanted one over my boobs and in the end went for a stick on one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’m far from an “Uncle Tom. “

The thing is.. the majority of people complaining about this is WHITE in this group.

White people can not determine what is racist when it concerns a black person.

What white people call racist and what black people call racist is two different things. BBC, QOS doesn’t hurt anyone.

BLack guys are not REALLY offended about “BBC “ title AND they are DEFINITELY not turning down any sex.

Real racism is a every day thing we face living our daily lives. Going to work, trying to get a job, trying to win a business contract, asking for directions lol.

Think about it ...

Chill out.

Spot on

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By *rsTrellisWoman
over a year ago

Cambridge

"I’m far from an “Uncle Tom. “

The thing is.. the majority of people complaining about this is WHITE in this group.

White people can not determine what is racist when it concerns a black person.

What white people call racist and what black people call racist is two different things. BBC, QOS doesn’t hurt anyone.

BLack guys are not REALLY offended about “BBC “ title AND they are DEFINITELY not turning down any sex.

Real racism is a every day thing we face living our daily lives. Going to work, trying to get a job, trying to win a business contract, asking for directions lol.

Think about it ...

Chill out.

Except several black men on this thread are saying they DO have a problem with it.

The problems faced in terms of going to work, trying to get a job, trying to win a business contract, asking for directions etc are exacerbated by demeaning stereotypes.

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By *arkside2698Man
over a year ago

luton

" If the lady likes black men that much, why didn't she marry one? This reinforces the belief or concept that black men are only good for one thing IMO.

My grievous side did hope she left him and ran away to the circus with a bearded lady from Nigeria."

That would be the ultimate poetic justice. Let's hope it happened as he sounds vile.

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By *ensualMan
over a year ago

Sutton

This topic keeps coming around every 6 months.

I distinguish sexual fetishism from racism and from genuine preference. On the basis that people have preferences and it is not always something they can control. To my mind the race fetishism is better than those who use preference to avoid meeting black people where the preference to avoid meeting black people is based on prejudice, social conformity and stereotyping.

Given that in my experience comparatively few women on Fab want to meet black men, then on the basis of the mutual satisfaction of sexual needs I have no problem with racial fetishism. Reminds of certain scene in the film Blazing Saddles.

My objection is to the expression of the fetishism which is generally demeaning. Although I would say a lot of people using the terms do not realise it is demeaning. This is because there are black men who apply the disparaging terms to themselves or who encourage women to call themselves QOS.

There are a number of good academic articles on fetishism of black people that cannot be linked to discussions due to Fab's internet policy.

Therefore although there are terms used in swinging that are clearly demeaning and should be avoided. In view of the current toxic state engendered by Brexit here and Trump in America. Where social and economic racism is being given high profile justification. Where arguments that I had thought had been resolved in the 1990s are being given fresh currency, and we live in an era of Black Lives Matter. Worrying about QOS tattoos is the last thing on my mind.

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

"I’m far from an “Uncle Tom. “

The thing is.. the majority of people complaining about this is WHITE in this group.

White people can not determine what is racist when it concerns a black person.

What white people call racist and what black people call racist is two different things. BBC, QOS doesn’t hurt anyone.

BLack guys are not REALLY offended about “BBC “ title AND they are DEFINITELY not turning down any sex.

Real racism is a every day thing we face living our daily lives. Going to work, trying to get a job, trying to win a business contract, asking for directions lol.

Think about it ...

Chill out.

I am a black male and expressing my opinion based on a lifetime of experience, not (just) reading about it in a book, so don't need the lecture about 'real racism'.

It's interesting your comments aren't equally directed towards the white people who are expressing a view about how black people should accept terms like this or don't understand the negative context.

If I was told by a white person that a term used to describe them was offensive I'd simply stop using it without the need for forensic analysis.

Personally I welcome the discussion from both sides, it's only through such discussions that casual/unintended racism will have a poditive effect on 'real racism' as you describe it.

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By *oreLifeMan
over a year ago

london

[Removed by poster at 19/09/18 12:35:39]

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By *oreLifeMan
over a year ago

london

[Removed by poster at 19/09/18 12:36:05]

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By *oreLifeMan
over a year ago

london

"I’m far from an “Uncle Tom. “

The thing is.. the majority of people complaining about this is WHITE in this group.

White people can not determine what is racist when it concerns a black person.

What white people call racist and what black people call racist is two different things. BBC, QOS doesn’t hurt anyone.

BLack guys are not REALLY offended about “BBC “ title AND they are DEFINITELY not turning down any sex.

Real racism is a every day thing we face living our daily lives. Going to work, trying to get a job, trying to win a business contract, asking for directions lol.

Think about it ...

Chill out.

Except several black men on this thread are saying they DO have a problem with it.

The problems faced in terms of going to work, trying to get a job, trying to win a business contract, asking for directions etc are exacerbated by demeaning stereotypes. "

So which one hurts more ?

BBC or not being able to get a job due to racist beliefs and negative views ?

.....

Back to my point ..

CHILL

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By *igblackdomTV/TS
over a year ago

West Midlands

" If the lady likes black men that much, why didn't she marry one? This reinforces the belief or concept that black men are only good for one thing IMO.

My grievous side did hope she left him and ran away to the circus with a bearded lady from Nigeria.

That would be the ultimate poetic justice. Let's hope it happened as he sounds vile. "

Actually he was perfectly nice, but that single statement betrayed an unconscious bias and he was unable to comprehend my questioning of it.

I was welcomed into their home, however one wonders what his view might have been if his daughter brought a black boy home, in this day and age such relationships shouldn't need to be regarded as a learning experience.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I personally find the whole QoS disgusting and racist. I get we have our preferences but nine times out of ten the people seeking to use a black man for their weekend self gratification, before returning to respectable white suburbia, are white couples. If the lady likes black men that much, why didn't she marry one? This reinforces the belief or concept that black men are only good for one thing IMO. What about treating people as people on their own merits and not skin colour?

Here, here, try living in east anglia, racism is rife.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" If the lady likes black men that much, why didn't she marry one? This reinforces the belief or concept that black men are only good for one thing IMO.

My grievous side did hope she left him and ran away to the circus with a bearded lady from Nigeria.

That would be the ultimate poetic justice. Let's hope it happened as he sounds vile.

Actually he was perfectly nice, but that single statement betrayed an unconscious bias and he was unable to comprehend my questioning of it.

What a gentleman you are x

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By *tarbeckCouple
over a year ago

york

I thought she ment chocolate as in a mars bar , i must be thick i think it is a horrible way to describe someone

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular

We have come a long way since the days of one of the country’s top wrestling stars being known as Kid Chocolate. Except when it comes to sexual fetishes obviously. It’s a wonder nobody has used the term Mandingo yet.

If someone finds any term racist or derogatory in any way there should not need to be any discussion about it, take it as read.

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

" . Why would they when they get torn to shreds over something as trivial as this ?

Just as interesting is that the use of the word 'spade' to describe black men is considered trivial and those who have suggested it's an offensive term are also 'torn to shreds'.

As I said in my post , I’ve never heard the term used in a derogatory way . Unless ‘ black as the ace of spades ‘ is derogatory . But even then , it’s not a way I would describe my friend to anyone . I would say he’s a tall black guy with a white shirt and jeans or whatever he’s wearing . I would imagine the barman would be asking me what I meant if I said ‘ he’s a spade ‘ .

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By *ensualMan
over a year ago

Sutton

" . Why would they when they get torn to shreds over something as trivial as this ?

Just as interesting is that the use of the word 'spade' to describe black men is considered trivial and those who have suggested it's an offensive term are also 'torn to shreds'.

This quote says it better than I can.

'Evidently, in the 1920s, "spade" started being used as a slang term, and then a derogatory slur, for a black person. This racist shift in the phrase's meaning also lead to the equally offensive phrase "black as the ace of spades."'

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By *uaneBBCMan
over a year ago

Walsall

I have met the lady who started this thread and her husband on three occassions and i have to say they are the nicest, coolist couple you could meet and the further from racist i doubt you will find !

The lady herself is very well educated and does a job i could not do, lets hope you mever have to meet her in a professional capacity as it means your life is turned upzide down !

My family are third generation immigrants so i know all about racism in all forms, i get comments on here every day from people wanting to meet with most racist comments but its cool as they are just ignorant.

I advertise myself as BBC as i want to meet white couples as i enjoy their compnany the mozt, am i racist because i dont want to meet Asian or Black couples ?

I dont need white people to defend my colour by being offended on my behalf, in fact i find it vulgar and immature when white people try to claim others are racist on my behalf like some kind of do godders, i know what racism is in my own mind and if i get with a lady with an queen of spades tattoo i would it more of a compliment than a slur !

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By *tarbeckCouple
over a year ago

york

"I have met the lady who started this thread and her husband on three occassions and i have to say they are the nicest, coolist couple you could meet and the further from racist i doubt you will find !

The lady herself is very well educated and does a job i could not do, lets hope you mever have to meet her in a professional capacity as it means your life is turned upzide down !

I advertise myself as BBC as i want to meet white couples as i enjoy their compnany the mozt, am i racist because i dont want to meet Asian or Black couples ?

"
ts an open forum everybody is able to voice their opionion , even if they dont agree with her or you

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By *ensualMan
over a year ago

Sutton

The lady herself is very well educated and does a job i could not do, lets hope you mever have to meet her in a professional capacity as it means your life is turned upzide down !

I advertise myself as BBC as i want to meet white couples as i enjoy their compnany the mozt, am i racist because i dont want to meet Asian or Black couples ?

I trust you are joking!

So only gay people can be offended by homophobic commentary!

So if you are subject to a physical attack by racists no white person should step in to help you, because they are offended on your behalf?

In the equality marches in America in the 1960s, white people should not have joined in, because their sense of justice opposed the racism?

Words fail me!

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By *uaneBBCMan
over a year ago

Walsall

The lady herself is very well educated and does a job i could not do, lets hope you mever have to meet her in a professional capacity as it means your life is turned upzide down !

I advertise myself as BBC as i want to meet white couples as i enjoy their compnany the mozt, am i racist because i dont want to meet Asian or Black couples ?

I trust you are joking!

So only gay people can be offended by homophobic commentary!

So if you are subject to a physical attack by racists no white person should step in to help you, because they are offended on your behalf?

In the equality marches in America in the 1960s, white people should not have joined in, because their sense of justice opposed the racism?

Words fail me!

No one stepped in to help me when i was at school when i was called coon and nigger, so all of a sudden there is a massive of white people wanting to defend me because it makes their ego feel good.

Id rather these people go on animal liberation marches for animals who can't defend themselves !

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By *tarbeckCouple
over a year ago

york

The lady herself is very well educated and does a job i could not do, lets hope you mever have to meet her in a professional capacity as it means your life is turned upzide down !

I advertise myself as BBC as i want to meet white couples as i enjoy their compnany the mozt, am i racist because i dont want to meet Asian or Black couples ?

I trust you are joking!

So only gay people can be offended by homophobic commentary!

So if you are subject to a physical attack by racists no white person should step in to help you, because they are offended on your behalf?

In the equality marches in America in the 1960s, white people should not have joined in, because their sense of justice opposed the racism?

Words fail me!

No one stepped in to help me when i was at school when i was called coon and nigger, so all of a sudden there is a massive of white people wanting to defend me because it makes their ego feel good.

Id rather these people go on animal liberation marches for animals who can't defend themselves !"

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ensualMan
over a year ago

Sutton

The lady herself is very well educated and does a job i could not do, lets hope you mever have to meet her in a professional capacity as it means your life is turned upzide down !

I advertise myself as BBC as i want to meet white couples as i enjoy their compnany the mozt, am i racist because i dont want to meet Asian or Black couples ?

I trust you are joking!

So only gay people can be offended by homophobic commentary!

So if you are subject to a physical attack by racists no white person should step in to help you, because they are offended on your behalf?

In the equality marches in America in the 1960s, white people should not have joined in, because their sense of justice opposed the racism?

Words fail me!

No one stepped in to help me when i was at school when i was called coon and nigger, so all of a sudden there is a massive of white people wanting to defend me because it makes their ego feel good.

Id rather these people go on animal liberation marches for animals who can't defend themselves !"

I have many friends that went through similar experiences, but that just made them militant. My experience is that I have had white people who have had my back since I was young.

But it is not our individual experiences but the collective experience. We are all more than a stereotype. If a person within a group wants to play a stereotype I leave them to it. But for other people to buy into the stereotype then at least let them be educated as to the arguments.

I have been on Fab 5 years and I took a break partly because the interacial stuff does my head in. But in my time I have known a number of women with QOS tattoos, who have been lovely people and well meaning. But at least they should know that a sizeable majority of people within the group who are not looking for sex find the tattoo offensive and the reasons why. The reasons being put forward by anyone. Then let them make their decision.

But as I have said before I think there are bigger issues out there.

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By *ELLONS AND CREAMWoman
over a year ago

stourbridge area

I find it offensive to black guys....a very old saying when I was a child was

As black as the ace of spades ...but that was in the era when golliwogs could be purchased ....

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

No one stepped in to help me when i was at school when i was called coon and nigger, so all of a sudden there is a massive of white people wanting to defend me because it makes their ego feel good.

Id rather these people go on animal liberation marches for animals who can't defend themselves !"

'Makes their ego feel good'?

So when you were being verbally abused at school you would have refused the support of white people because it made them feel good?

How do you feel about being called a spade by total strangers?

What about the principles of abuse?

What about the white people who've lived with it and seen it through the eyes of their non white partners and children as my wife has?

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

" i know what racism is in my own mind and if i get with a lady with an queen of spades tattoo i would it more of a compliment than a slur !

Extending that daft philosophy you'd no doubt be waltzing her down the aisle if she had one proclaiming to be a N*** Lover

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

[Removed by poster at 19/09/18 15:18:02]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wow its certainly ruffled a few feathers this tattoo lol... I've got some reading to catch up on!

wonder if I can learn anything!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My username is descriptive.

I'm big (over 18 stones)

I'm black (that's indisputable)

..my name's Dominic.

Im a big, black MAN, not a big black COCK, it's interesting some folks are unable to discern the difference!

Why even call yourself big black, surely you know that people will make assumptions from it, it’s almost as if you want the attention but want to keep the moral high ground.

I agree with that.. If any male of any nationality put big in there profile name, I'd always think they're talking about cock size. It's this site its brainwashed us lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

Another one on their moral high ground been on 10 months no veri's and dictates to others got to love them (not) go with the semi permanent and see how you feel xx

She is verified.

Strange just checked her profile

And she has a green tick which means she's verified. Not everyone chooses to display them.

Lots of dirty finger nails as they point

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Swinging is different things to different people .

Terminology will be interpreted by different people in different ways .

If a woman is looking for a well endowed black guy , I can’t see why she can’t ask for a BBC .

Any more than I can’t see the problem with using the word chocolate to describe a colour , because that’s what it is .

EXACTLY.... ANOTHER THREAD SHOULD OF BEEN CONSIDERED, IF THESE SO CALLED RACIAL VIEW POINTS HAD TO BE AIRED. Its all too much now!

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

My username is descriptive.

I'm big (over 18 stones)

I'm black (that's indisputable)

..my name's Dominic.

Im a big, black MAN, not a big black COCK, it's interesting some folks are unable to discern the difference!

Why even call yourself big black, surely you know that people will make assumptions from it, it’s almost as if you want the attention but want to keep the moral high ground.

I agree with that.. If any male of any nationality put big in there profile name, I'd always think they're talking about cock size. It's this site its brainwashed us lol"

It may well be referring to cock size, but the user isn't referring to himself as a spade or using other demeaning language.

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London

My username is descriptive.

I'm big (over 18 stones)

I'm black (that's indisputable)

..my name's Dominic.

Im a big, black MAN, not a big black COCK, it's interesting some folks are unable to discern the difference!

Why even call yourself big black, surely you know that people will make assumptions from it, it’s almost as if you want the attention but want to keep the moral high ground.

I agree with that.. If any male of any nationality put big in there profile name, I'd always think they're talking about cock size. It's this site its brainwashed us lol

It may well be referring to cock size, but the user isn't referring to himself as a spade or using other demeaning language."

What gets me is the "likes chocolate" comment. Are we in 1975?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" . Why would they when they get torn to shreds over something as trivial as this ?

Just as interesting is that the use of the word 'spade' to describe black men is considered trivial and those who have suggested it's an offensive term are also 'torn to shreds'.

That's absolutely fine, but perhaps irrelevant to the current theme.

Incidentally, as others have done, you're conflating my dislike of the terms BBC, Queen of Spades etc with a dislike of people's right to express a racial preference.

Just so I'm clear my objection is to the terms being used to describe that preference!"

So you would object to her getting a tattoo? Not semi not permanent NOT AT ALL?.... Keeping with the theme of the OP question

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

My username is descriptive.

I'm big (over 18 stones)

I'm black (that's indisputable)

..my name's Dominic.

Im a big, black MAN, not a big black COCK, it's interesting some folks are unable to discern the difference!

Why even call yourself big black, surely you know that people will make assumptions from it, it’s almost as if you want the attention but want to keep the moral high ground.

I agree with that.. If any male of any nationality put big in there profile name, I'd always think they're talking about cock size. It's this site its brainwashed us lol

It may well be referring to cock size, but the user isn't referring to himself as a spade or using other demeaning language.

What gets me is the "likes chocolate" comment. Are we in 1975? "

Indeed, as it's being used to describe a positive sentiment it's almost as though the words used are irrelevant and shouldn't be commented on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My username is descriptive.

I'm big (over 18 stones)

I'm black (that's indisputable)

..my name's Dominic.

Im a big, black MAN, not a big black COCK, it's interesting some folks are unable to discern the difference!

Why even call yourself big black, surely you know that people will make assumptions from it, it’s almost as if you want the attention but want to keep the moral high ground.

I agree with that.. If any male of any nationality put big in there profile name, I'd always think they're talking about cock size. It's this site its brainwashed us lol

It may well be referring to cock size, but the user isn't referring to himself as a spade or using other demeaning language."

That's irrelevant to the above comment he was making....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ahhhh to live in a world where we just liked a person because we clicked with them regardless of skin colour or highlighting our colour differences

*Sigh*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Start a new thread on racist terminology...

This is about A SPADE TATTOO!

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By *ensualMan
over a year ago

Sutton

"“Love of chocolate”?

Could you be any more objectifying?

Oh, yes you could. By considering a “Queen of Spades” tattoo.

Another one on their moral high ground been on 10 months no veri's and dictates to others got to love them (not) go with the semi permanent and see how you feel xx

She is verified.

Strange just checked her profile

And she has a green tick which means she's verified. Not everyone chooses to display them.

Lots of dirty finger nails as they point

It is not about the kink or desire , it is how you refer to people. It is no different than referring to all women as 'sluts'. Sure some women like to be called 'slut' and have that profile name but most women and men would find referring to women as 'sluts rude. So not a preference matter at all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am currently getting my ideas put into a design. It's going to be a big one, on my thigh. It's a Disney design, but those in the know may recognise it for what it is,and those who don't, will assume it's just another tattoo

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

My username is descriptive.

I'm big (over 18 stones)

I'm black (that's indisputable)

..my name's Dominic.

Im a big, black MAN, not a big black COCK, it's interesting some folks are unable to discern the difference!

Why even call yourself big black, surely you know that people will make assumptions from it, it’s almost as if you want the attention but want to keep the moral high ground.

I agree with that.. If any male of any nationality put big in there profile name, I'd always think they're talking about cock size. It's this site its brainwashed us lol

It may well be referring to cock size, but the user isn't referring to himself as a spade or using other demeaning language.

That's irrelevant to the above comment he was making.... "

He did explain very clearly what he was referring to (you include it in your post!), it was the poster he was responding to (and you) who have made the assumptions and yet you still choose to not accept what he says.

For someone who complains about the thread straying off topic you certainly have made enough comments on it.

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By *ercuryMan
over a year ago

Grantham

The term "spade" is a shortened version of "he's as black as the ace of spades".

Whilst the sentiment may be true, derogatory terms such as spade, darkie, coon, sambo, and nigger, which were thrown about in the last fifty years, have been largely consigned to history as we now live in more enlightened times.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Too active to read all this lol

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By *ady-LoverMan
over a year ago

swindon

I like Cadbury’s milk chocolate bars very tasty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Too active to read all this lol "

I am with you on that its all so petty! Someone wants a tattoo big deal let them have it as its their body.

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By *ifeTimeCouple
over a year ago

Grays

Always feel uncomfortable when lots of middle class white people get so utterly outraged on the behalf of behalf of a certain community. I’m not particularly comfortable with the QOS thing but if black guys are in this site to meet white women and married couples are on the site to meet black guys then let them get on with objectifying each other. It’s a niche that exists and has very enthusiastic participants on all sides. I’m not about to get offended on anyone’s behalf if it’s consensual and shared between adults. Just because you are offended, white or black, doesn’t make you right or wrong.

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By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

" I’m not particularly comfortable with the QOS thing but if black guys are in this site to meet white women and married couples are on the site to meet black guys then let them get on with objectifying each other. It’s a niche that exists and has very enthusiastic participants on all sides. I’m not about to get offended on anyone’s behalf if it’s consensual and shared between adults. Just because you are offended, white or black, doesn’t make you right or wrong. "

..and yet you're sufficiently concerned to contribute to the thread?

Why not let the 'outraged' (not that I've seen any more outrage from one group more than an another) get on with discussing issues that concern them and they clearly have strong views about.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My username is descriptive.

I'm big (over 18 stones)

I'm black (that's indisputable)

..my name's Dominic.

Im a big, black MAN, not a big black COCK, it's interesting some folks are unable to discern the difference!

Why even call yourself big black, surely you know that people will make assumptions from it, it’s almost as if you want the attention but want to keep the moral high ground.

I agree with that.. If any male of any nationality put big in there profile name, I'd always think they're talking about cock size. It's this site its brainwashed us lol

It may well be referring to cock size, but the user isn't referring to himself as a spade or using other demeaning language.

That's irrelevant to the above comment he was making....

For someone who complains about the thread straying off topic you certainly have made enough comments on it."

Yes I have dear, cos I've been on it since this morning g then worked and come back to read as above post said.... I'll stand by what I meant earlier and if I'd seen the black man's profile in search I would of presumed he was referring to his cock not his height/body size. That's what I'm trying to get across. Is that clearer?

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By *rwhite30Man
over a year ago

deptford London

i think it is amazingly sexy to see a woman with that tat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hope she has the tattoo, comes back and asks us what we think of it. Curious to know where on the body it's placed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wow all this over a silly tattoo some people are easily upset.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i think it is amazingly sexy to see a woman with that tat"

I'd never seen them before I came on fab. I think all ink is sexy!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Always feel uncomfortable when lots of middle class white people get so utterly outraged on the behalf of behalf of a certain community. I’m not particularly comfortable with the QOS thing but if black guys are in this site to meet white women and married couples are on the site to meet black guys then let them get on with objectifying each other. It’s a niche that exists and has very enthusiastic participants on all sides. I’m not about to get offended on anyone’s behalf if it’s consensual and shared between adults. Just because you are offended, white or black, doesn’t make you right or wrong. "

Agreed, in most cases said outraged people have little or no knowledge on the subject and feel the need to tell us all about their unfounded outrage. You can’t please all the people all of the time but is there really a need to go airing your views when the question posed by OP was entirely different? I don’t agree with loads of stuff, but I don’t feel the need to go telling the world about it. Live and let live, let the individuals directly concerned to make up their own minds and if something is commonly found to be that offensive then it will defeat its only purpose, causing less play and become redundant

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By *imjayne OP Couple
over a year ago

Stafford

Wow, I go to work, come back and see the meltdown I’ve created !

One thing I must say is that my original post was never meant to offend anyone and was originally just as a response to my hubby goading me to have the tattoo as it was suggested to me by a black guy at a recent meet.

I will also say, I must chat with at least three black guys on a daily basis if i would had a meet and had sex with them, do I mind being called a ‘dirty white slut’ or words to that effect as it’s a turn on for them.

I have been in situations where those phrases have been used and in the throws of passion it’s not really offensive to me, more a game !

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"Wow, I go to work, come back and see the meltdown I’ve created !

I have been in situations where those phrases have been used and in the throws of passion it’s not really offensive to me, more a game !"

Exactly !

My wife has been called ‘ my little white slut ‘ and various names relating to her colour like ‘ look at that white mommas ass ‘ , so many times by black guys in this scenario . They love it , she loves it so what anyone else thinks is inconsequential to us , just as it should be for you

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

as with everything.... you are likely to turn off as many of your target audience as you are likely to turn on...

if i get a whiff of being used as some sort of racial stereotype... i am off in the other direction

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In my real life I have encountered racism...

When a white person who doesn’t know me will says to me “ Rudeboycane you’re not really black . You talk white , don’t have baby mommas , never been to jail , and have a good job “

I use to explain to them that was stereotyping all black men and that was what the media wants people to think about black men...

Now I just say “ oh so I’m not really black , well let me marry your sister... you can tell your parents I’m not really black “ they will never Say that to me again.

I’ve had black women in my family and in school ask me why I don’t date black women. Call me a sell out for dating outside of my race..

I’ve always responded with “ I date who I get along with “

I’ve had many people come into my office and look at my degrees on the wall. Then look at me with astonishment then say “ Wow you graduated from this University “

This is real world racism/stereotyping...

When it comes to swinging... this is a outlet to express sexual desire that is not mainstream..

People swing to escape real life for a brief moment then get back to everyday life...

This isn’t the place for angst... please leave your moral outrage at the door and do what you came here for... to have great sex.

I’m sorry to say this but if some of you are so offended and outraged because someone you never met nor will meet is getting a tattoo. You need to get a life

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By *tarbeckCouple
over a year ago

york

"In my real life I have encountered racism...

When a white person who doesn’t know me will says to me “ Rudeboycane you’re not really black . You talk white , don’t have baby mommas , never been to jail , and have a good job “

I use to explain to them that was stereotyping all black men and that was what the media wants people to think about black men...

Now I just say “ oh so I’m not really black , well let me marry your sister... you can tell your parents I’m not really black “ they will never Say that to me again.

I’ve had black women in my family and in school ask me why I don’t date black women. Call me a sell out for dating outside of my race..

I’ve always responded with “ I date who I get along with “

I’ve had many people come into my office and look at my degrees on the wall. Then look at me with astonishment then say “ Wow you graduated from this University “

This is real world racism/stereotyping...

When it comes to swinging... this is a outlet to express sexual desire that is not mainstream..

People swing to escape real life for a brief moment then get back to everyday life...

This isn’t the place for angst... please leave your moral outrage at the door and do what you came here for... to have great sex.

I’m sorry to say this but if some of you are so offended and outraged because someone you never met nor will meet is getting a tattoo. You need to get a life "
I have a life thanks , and an opinion that i am allowed to share

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In my real life I have encountered racism...

When a white person who doesn’t know me will says to me “ Rudeboycane you’re not really black . You talk white , don’t have baby mommas , never been to jail , and have a good job “

I use to explain to them that was stereotyping all black men and that was what the media wants people to think about black men...

Now I just say “ oh so I’m not really black , well let me marry your sister... you can tell your parents I’m not really black “ they will never Say that to me again.

I’ve had black women in my family and in school ask me why I don’t date black women. Call me a sell out for dating outside of my race..

I’ve always responded with “ I date who I get along with “

I’ve had many people come into my office and look at my degrees on the wall. Then look at me with astonishment then say “ Wow you graduated from this University “

This is real world racism/stereotyping...

When it comes to swinging... this is a outlet to express sexual desire that is not mainstream..

People swing to escape real life for a brief moment then get back to everyday life...

This isn’t the place for angst... please leave your moral outrage at the door and do what you came here for... to have great sex.

I’m sorry to say this but if some of you are so offended and outraged because someone you never met nor will meet is getting a tattoo. You need to get a life I have a life thanks , and an opinion that i am allowed to share

This is the reason the internet is going to doom mankind....

Please have a opinion but share it at the right moment...

The Op asked if she should get a permanent tattoo and who has the same tattoo, she is interested in getting...it’s a very innocent question...this isn’t the appropriate moment to share your views on racism/stereotyping in the swinging world.....

It’s like being invited to a 5 year old birthday party that has a pony ride... would it be appropriate to tell all the children at the party why they shouldn’t ride the pony because you’re a member of Peta.... it’s your right to share your opinion... but you will ruin the party for all the children...

Before the internet people used to mind their business and if they had nothing nice to say. They wouldn’t say anything at all.... now people can’t help themselves.....

Ask Rosanna Barr and countless people who have lost their careers over sharing their opinions on the internet if it was worth it...

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By *tarbeckCouple
over a year ago

york

"In my real life I have encountered racism...

When a white person who doesn’t know me will says to me “ Rudeboycane you’re not really black . You talk white , don’t have baby mommas , never been to jail , and have a good job “

I use to explain to them that was stereotyping all black men and that was what the media wants people to think about black men...

Now I just say “ oh so I’m not really black , well let me marry your sister... you can tell your parents I’m not really black “ they will never Say that to me again.

I’ve had black women in my family and in school ask me why I don’t date black women. Call me a sell out for dating outside of my race..

I’ve always responded with “ I date who I get along with “

I’ve had many people come into my office and look at my degrees on the wall. Then look at me with astonishment then say “ Wow you graduated from this University “

This is real world racism/stereotyping...

When it comes to swinging... this is a outlet to express sexual desire that is not mainstream..

People swing to escape real life for a brief moment then get back to everyday life...

This isn’t the place for angst... please leave your moral outrage at the door and do what you came here for... to have great sex.

This is the reason the internet is going to doom mankind....

Please have a opinion but share it at the right moment...

Before the internet people used to mind their business and if they had nothing nice to say. They wouldn’t say anything at all.... now people can’t help themselves.....

Ask Rosanna Barr and countless people who have lost their careers over sharing their opinions on the internet if it was worth it..."
Thats my fab career over with then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In my real life I have encountered racism...

When a white person who doesn’t know me will says to me “ Rudeboycane you’re not really black . You talk white , don’t have baby mommas , never been to jail , and have a good job “

I use to explain to them that was stereotyping all black men and that was what the media wants people to think about black men...

Now I just say “ oh so I’m not really black , well let me marry your sister... you can tell your parents I’m not really black “ they will never Say that to me again.

I’ve had black women in my family and in school ask me why I don’t date black women. Call me a sell out for dating outside of my race..

I’ve always responded with “ I date who I get along with “

I’ve had many people come into my office and look at my degrees on the wall. Then look at me with astonishment then say “ Wow you graduated from this University “

This is real world racism/stereotyping...

When it comes to swinging... this is a outlet to express sexual desire that is not mainstream..

People swing to escape real life for a brief moment then get back to everyday life...

This isn’t the place for angst... please leave your moral outrage at the door and do what you came here for... to have great sex.

This is the reason the internet is going to doom mankind....

Please have a opinion but share it at the right moment...

Before the internet people used to mind their business and if they had nothing nice to say. They wouldn’t say anything at all.... now people can’t help themselves.....

Ask Rosanna Barr and countless people who have lost their careers over sharing their opinions on the internet if it was worth it... Thats my fab career over with then

Well I wish you all the best....

All the people that are offended by the term bbc and queen of spades ..please continue to enjoy your swinging experience and let the people who are not offended enjoy theirs....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why oh why do people have to get on their moral high horse.

OP simply asked a question she didn't ask for people to go on the racist attack.

It's a swinging site, people have likes and dislikes that's what swinging is about. We are all different and all have different choices.

I have one on my ass, I only play with black guys and my partner is black. It's a preference and a choice.... MY CHOICE.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In my real life I have encountered racism...

When a white person who doesn’t know me will says to me “ Rudeboycane you’re not really black . You talk white , don’t have baby mommas , never been to jail , and have a good job “

I use to explain to them that was stereotyping all black men and that was what the media wants people to think about black men...

Now I just say “ oh so I’m not really black , well let me marry your sister... you can tell your parents I’m not really black “ they will never Say that to me again.

I’ve had black women in my family and in school ask me why I don’t date black women. Call me a sell out for dating outside of my race..

I’ve always responded with “ I date who I get along with “

I’ve had many people come into my office and look at my degrees on the wall. Then look at me with astonishment then say “ Wow you graduated from this University “

This is real world racism/stereotyping...

When it comes to swinging... this is a outlet to express sexual desire that is not mainstream..

People swing to escape real life for a brief moment then get back to everyday life...

This isn’t the place for angst... please leave your moral outrage at the door and do what you came here for... to have great sex.

This is the reason the internet is going to doom mankind....

Please have a opinion but share it at the right moment...

Before the internet people used to mind their business and if they had nothing nice to say. They wouldn’t say anything at all.... now people can’t help themselves.....

Ask Rosanna Barr and countless people who have lost their careers over sharing their opinions on the internet if it was worth it... Thats my fab career over with then

Well I wish you all the best....

All the people that are offended by the term bbc and queen of spades ..please continue to enjoy your swinging experience and let the people who are not offended enjoy theirs...."
.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Wow all this over a silly tattoo some people are easily upset. "

Totally agree with you, it's pathetic

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By *iveshowcoupleCouple
over a year ago

glasgow

"Why oh why do people have to get on their moral high horse.

OP simply asked a question she didn't ask for people to go on the racist attack.

It's a swinging site, people have likes and dislikes that's what swinging is about. We are all different and all have different choices.

I have one on my ass, I only play with black guys and my partner is black. It's a preference and a choice.... MY CHOICE. "

The problem is that too many people trawl through the forums desperately looking for opportunities to get offended. They vent their apparently considerable frustrations.

A pack mentality clearly takes place as well. One troll starts an attack which sets the theme for others to follow.

I read and follow often without any particular opinion on the topic.

Then I block those whose attitude disturbs me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why oh why do people have to get on their moral high horse.

OP simply asked a question she didn't ask for people to go on the racist attack.

It's a swinging site, people have likes and dislikes that's what swinging is about. We are all different and all have different choices.

I have one on my ass, I only play with black guys and my partner is black. It's a preference and a choice.... MY CHOICE.

The problem is that too many people trawl through the forums desperately looking for opportunities to get offended. They vent their apparently considerable frustrations.

A pack mentality clearly takes place as well. One troll starts an attack which sets the theme for others to follow.

I read and follow often without any particular opinion on the topic.

Then I block those whose attitude disturbs me. "

I agree with you, think I may start doing the same

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By *ustalittleKinkWoman
over a year ago

in the shadows

Before the internet people used to mind their business and if they had nothing nice to say. They wouldn’t say anything at all.... now people can’t help themselves.....

Well said

Op, you asked a simple question. I say do whatever you feel comfortable with and whatever makes you happy.

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By *oshker71Man
over a year ago

Cardiff

" If the lady likes black men that much, why didn't she marry one? This reinforces the belief or concept that black men are only good for one thing IMO.

My grievous side did hope she left him and ran away to the circus with a bearded lady from Nigeria."

Lol I wouldn’t have been offended I would have just fucked her to an inch of her life haha.

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By *oshker71Man
over a year ago

Cardiff

"I’m far from an “Uncle Tom. “

The thing is.. the majority of people complaining about this is WHITE in this group.

White people can not determine what is racist when it concerns a black person.

What white people call racist and what black people call racist is two different things. BBC, QOS doesn’t hurt anyone.

BLack guys are not REALLY offended about “BBC “ title AND they are DEFINITELY not turning down any sex.

Real racism is a every day thing we face living our daily lives. Going to work, trying to get a job, trying to win a business contract, asking for directions lol.

Think about it ...

Chill out.

Well said dude

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

I do wonder sometimes that what people really want when they ask questions like this isn’t really a discussion, but actually affirmation of what they have already decided what they are going to do......

So you get people with a different opinion... then you get people more forcefully attacking the dissenting opinion

Wagon circling and then more wagon circling again

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