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Wanting someone you can't have

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By *mids Lad OP   Man
over a year ago

West Midlands

I keep finding myself attracted to and going after people who I can't have for whatever reason (married, in a relationship, older, lives too far away etc) , and even though I know I can't be with them , it makes me want them even more ...

Just wondered if anyone else have this problem or is it just me ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's not only you!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Join the club

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think this has probably happened to most of us at some point! X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, join the club

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Think this has probably happened to most of us at some point! X"

Sex and lust are a dangerous combo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Think this has probably happened to most of us at some point! X

Sex and lust are a dangerous combo"

Absolutely!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Same. Im really attracted to girls older than me. But they just aren't interested in me. It's game I can't win

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I did. We used to chat almost every day, but he wasn't here for meets. To be fair I knew from the start but was hoping I could change his mind.

The frustration of not being able to meet him, especially as he was very local, got too much and we've lost contact.

Shame as I miss his chats. But he knows where I am if he changes his mind.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its the forbidden fruit thing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Story of my life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The minute you know you can’t have something you crave it all the more. Life’s a bitch.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep. The feeling was mutual but he ended it and won't speak to me now. Makes me feel like a leper.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are some real fit women on here. But soon as I send a message. MC Hammer plays just cant touch it

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

Yes I know that feeling too well

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes unfortunately

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By *ebjonnsonMan
over a year ago

Maldon


"Think this has probably happened to most of us at some point! X

Sex and lust are a dangerous combo"

Very dangerous. But doesn’t it feel so fucking great though. Forbidden fruit and all that.

Perhaps people that experience then lose that end up in sites like this?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes been there a few times

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Probably only once. It's quite visceral and very hard to shake off. The thinking brain has a very difficult job to speak sense and frequently fails.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mine is more something rather than someone to be fair.

X

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro

I dont really think theres such a thing as cant its more about if you really want to from my prospective.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes a few times. So hard to shake it off. Xx

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By *ebjonnsonMan
over a year ago

Maldon


"Mine is more something rather than someone to be fair.

X"

Now I’m really intrigued. Explain please?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I keep finding myself attracted to and going after people who I can't have for whatever reason (married, in a relationship, older, lives too far away etc) , and even though I know I can't be with them , it makes me want them even more ...

Just wondered if anyone else have this problem or is it just me ?"

Not one of those reasons you have is valid.

Just your desire and will isn't strong enough, so you're attracted but not willing to make an effort.

When I met my wife she lived a 200 mile trip away, was engaged and I was married and she is quite a lot uounger than me. You just need to make the effort if it's right.

The only real thing that stops you is if the other person doesn't feel the same way about you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I keep finding myself attracted to and going after people who I can't have for whatever reason (married, in a relationship, older, lives too far away etc) , and even though I know I can't be with them , it makes me want them even more ...

Just wondered if anyone else have this problem or is it just me ?"

Yeah. Know that only too well

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I know a guy who is always mooning after women he can't have from Fiona Bruce to married ladies and women half his age who think of him as some kind of oddity. It saves him from getting involved in a real relationship that might fail or oblige him to put some effort in.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can I join this club?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes I've definetly been there. I think a lot of people will of in life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 09/09/18 19:46:10]

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By *olexMan
over a year ago

Hull

Happens to me so often.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Always. #sighs

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By *elshsunsWoman
over a year ago

Flintshire

Happening to me now .. so exciting

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By *ruly50Woman
over a year ago

ely


"The minute you know you can’t have something you crave it all the more. Life’s a bitch."

Ain’t that the truth!!

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By *mids Lad OP   Man
over a year ago

West Midlands

Thanks all ...

Glad it's not just me lol

There's someone I'm interested in right now , we get on well and talk all the time but she's married so nothing can happen and not sure she feels that way about me .. I know I should forget about her and look elsewhere but can't...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes is all il say

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds familiar

Tho I made the cardinal sin of falling for someone I can't have and no matter how hard I try I can stop it.

I try to be friends but get jealous if I see her just say lol to someone else

Saddo lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 09/09/18 21:13:10]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Typos corrected:

I was engaged to a woman for quite some time, although we never tied the knot, but the thing I miss the most about that relationship is her mother. What a heck of a woman she was, but out of reach, although there was a mutual attraction without any shadow of a doubt. She was close enough to touch, but a million miles away from ever being in my bed.

I talked to her mother maybe 5 months after we split, she was sad that she didn't see me anymore. That will do for me, I can live the fantasy haha.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Happens to us all at some point

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

I’m going through it at the moment and I’m pissed off that I can’t shake it off. He’s a friend and totally off limits.

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By *itty Kat ABWoman
over a year ago

North Somerset

Hence I socialise in clubs with a view to meeting people with a mutual attraction rather than profiles that turn out not to be local or the like.

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London


"Probably only once. It's quite visceral and very hard to shake off. The thinking brain has a very difficult job to speak sense and frequently fails. "

Ain’t that the truth

This is the first time ever I’ve been unable to box the feeling up and drown it. It stinks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yup, my fwb... 14 years younger.

He found a vanilla girlfriend, I was happy for him because it meant he could settle down and I could get him out of my system.

Last week, we asked to meet, he's no longer with her, he confessed a few things to me.

Now I'm in turmoil at what he said, we can't work as a couple. And us coming out would upset a lot of people. It's complicated.

Why is life so complicated.

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By *r_BlueEyesMan
over a year ago

Manchester

It's so frustrating wanting something that you can't have but that's also what makes it so much more of a trill. The quest for the Holy Grail.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m no ones second choice, or even their ‘choice’. The idea puts me off, maybe that’s why I’ve not had this before. Unless you count Tom Hardy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I keep meeting and liking guys that want kids. That kind of sucks as I don’t.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Once or twice it’s caught me out, I usually back off seeing them then but sometimes, equally, I can compartmentalise meeting someone really easily. It’s a fine line walking between love and lust.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Probably only once. It's quite visceral and very hard to shake off. The thinking brain has a very difficult job to speak sense and frequently fails.

Ain’t that the truth

This is the first time ever I’ve been unable to box the feeling up and drown it. It stinks. "

this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I keep meeting and liking guys that want kids. That kind of sucks as I don’t. "
don't suck or don't want kids

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I joined this site cos i was sick of letting myself catch feelings for men that didnt feel the same so this way i have a different outlook and not here for love just fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I keep finding myself attracted to and going after people who I can't have for whatever reason (married, in a relationship, older, lives too far away etc) , and even though I know I can't be with them , it makes me want them even more ...

Just wondered if anyone else have this problem or is it just me ?"

Yes. A few years back I was really into a woman on here from Birmingham. She was on the forums a lot. When I said I really liked her and thought she was sexy she thought I was taking the piss. She just wouldn't believe me. I don't know if it was due to low confidence. I really did like her. I enjoyed reading her forums posts and enjoyed chatting to her now and again. I would have moved to Birmingham for her if she wanted.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Mine is more something rather than someone to be fair.

X"

Intriguing lol.

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By *andsome_Chef88Man
over a year ago

London

Ahhh, someone for everyone. There’s someone on here for ya dude

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yep. The feeling was mutual but he ended it and won't speak to me now. Makes me feel like a leper. "

That's awful

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I keep finding myself attracted to and going after people who I can't have for whatever reason (married, in a relationship, older, lives too far away etc) , and even though I know I can't be with them , it makes me want them even more ...

Just wondered if anyone else have this problem or is it just me ?"

No it's not just you. I find it happens quite a lot to me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I keep finding myself attracted to and going after people who I can't have for whatever reason (married, in a relationship, older, lives too far away etc) , and even though I know I can't be with them , it makes me want them even more ...

Just wondered if anyone else have this problem or is it just me ?"

The problem is there are some seriously sexy woman on here from all part of the UK. I looked at a woman's profile the other day and thought "Wow you are really really sexy" Then I looked at her age. She was mid 60's. She was absolutely stunning. With lots of sexy women from all parts of the UK on here you are bound to fancy some women who live miles away from you.

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

..

Yes I can relate to that.

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By *ettyboop61Woman
over a year ago

St Neots

I wish somebody liked me that much for it to matter

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes

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By *andsome_Chef88Man
over a year ago

London


"Yes "

Everything about your profile is hott

Too bad have to wait next month to even contact you. (30 next month)

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London


"I wish somebody liked me that much for it to matter "

They probably do but too reluctant to say anything. Most of us fear rejection so don’t admit it. Such a daft state of affairs really as if we are rejected, we are in the same position as when we started!

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By *wansplaymateMan
over a year ago

swansea

Story of my life !!

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I've definitely had the problem. Really badly.

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By *ymaleMan
over a year ago

nr Bradford

Dare say many have had some element of this experience. Wouldn't be judgemental enough to say it's right or wrong, just accept it happens. And to be fair, for all the potential negatives, there can be some amazing positives!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I wish somebody liked me that much for it to matter

They probably do but too reluctant to say anything. Most of us fear rejection so don’t admit it. Such a daft state of affairs really as if we are rejected, we are in the same position as when we started!"

Very true.

I know after reading some of my forum posts people may not believe this lol. However, I am quite shy in real life until I get to know you. I am also a sensitive person. There are a few woman on Fab I would love to meet. My insecurities stop me from messaging them. If I don't try and meet them I can kid myself I might have a chance of meeting them one day.

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By *veready69Man
over a year ago

PLYMOUTH


"I dont really think theres such a thing as cant its more about if you really want to from my prospective.

"

I cant message you due to your filters ( and your preferences as detailed in your profile) Doesn't stop me wanting too though....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

treat it like a pub

you cant walk in and expect everyone to fancy you

sometimes you meet someone ,most times you dont

where did we all meet our first love

or long termlover

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep me... best mates wife who keep cards close to their chest but she always dresses to impress and looks stunning andna few times ive crashed there as we got d*unk incan hear them having noisey sex through the wall as if to tease me

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro


"I dont really think theres such a thing as cant its more about if you really want to from my prospective.

I cant message you due to your filters ( and your preferences as detailed in your profile) Doesn't stop me wanting too though...."

It was all going so well until the end.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yup I fell in love with my previous FWB but it turned out that he was wasn't single it got complecated and now we don't meet

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By *mids Lad OP   Man
over a year ago

West Midlands

Just so frustrating sometimes !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Life aye fucking throwing obstacles in the way.

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By *iss Penny TrationWoman
over a year ago

NW

Story of my life

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By *iss Penny TrationWoman
over a year ago

NW


"Yep me... best mates wife who keep cards close to their chest but she always dresses to impress and looks stunning andna few times ive crashed there as we got d*unk incan hear them having noisey sex through the wall as if to tease me "

Or maybe ... just maybe ... they are doing it for their own pleasure, not yours? And maybe she dresses well because she is an adult and can dress how she wants? Just an idea

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Story of my life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Literally about 10 times a day

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah. A teacher when I was about 13/14. I thought she was stunning. Teenage lad hormones going mental.

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By *aeganaWoman
over a year ago

birmingham

Yup played with a couple and got addicted to fuckin with the guy they quit swingin and there friends. Doesnt help when he teases me all the time and u wanna keep the friendship good but ur horniness is drivin u wild lol.

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By *andsome_Chef88Man
over a year ago

London


"Yup played with a couple and got addicted to fuckin with the guy they quit swingin and there friends. Doesnt help when he teases me all the time and u wanna keep the friendship good but ur horniness is drivin u wild lol."

Naughty

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yup played with a couple and got addicted to fuckin with the guy they quit swingin and there friends. Doesnt help when he teases me all the time and u wanna keep the friendship good but ur horniness is drivin u wild lol."

That’s wrong. Cut it off now. He’s wrong yes but so are you! You know he’s attached

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By *otgirl32Woman
over a year ago

Ashton Under Lyne

It's something we have all faced. I tried HARD but he was married and it wasn't meant to be. That's life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I keep finding myself attracted to and going after people who I can't have for whatever reason (married, in a relationship, older, lives too far away etc) , and even though I know I can't be with them , it makes me want them even more ...

Just wondered if anyone else have this problem or is it just me ?"
of course, you're attracted to who you're attracted to

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yes

Everything about your profile is hott

Too bad have to wait next month to even contact you. (30 next month)"
Oh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s the story of my life

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By * n hCouple
over a year ago

slarrr

Serenity people.... Have the SERENITY

To ACCEPT the things you can not change...

The COURAGE to change the things you can.

And have the WISDOM to know the diffrence....

if still you cant contain yourself!

PUT a CONDOM on it..

sleep about , Dont pass it about......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes I agree with the OP ... the one you want is not easily accessible but when did we ever do it the easy way eh

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By *iSTARessWoman
over a year ago

London

My FWB who I've had to pop on the friends bench. He's seeing someone in the vanilla world and I can't be doing with cheating

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Story of my life,especially after passing 50.

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By *mids Lad OP   Man
over a year ago

West Midlands

Thanks for all the comments guys ... nice to know it's not just me this Happens to lol!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I want someone I can't have

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also have this problem.

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