FabSwingers.com forum: BDSM A Dom/me's responsibilities

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What does it mean to be a Dom/me and have a sub? To many think its just giving orders, thrashings and using for self gratification. Think about it that sub as handed control and their trust over to you and with that a serious responsibility. Yes it great to have someone happy to obey your commands and satisify your needs, but dont forget we have to see to their needs both pyshical and emotional, if we dont then we run the risk of scarring them for life, most often mentally. We are given the gift of submission which we muct cherish and respect or lose it.

Recently my sub was rushed into hospital due to dangerously high blood preasure, the a+e staff, who were fantastic btw, told me they were concerned about the risk of a stroke. She was kept in while they tried to bring her BP down and stable, also conducting loads of tests. Ok she is home again now but has to undergo more tests as there are indicators she may have heart problems , needing possible treatment or risk an attack. Obviously she is not 100% pyshically fit and is going through a lot of emotional and mentral stress. Now is where my responsibilities has her Dom are really needed, no i cant thrash her at the moment or have her just satisfying me like some would believe is her duty. My duty is to support her, keep her calm, stand by her through all the tests and stress and help her get through it all to return to a normal life regardless of what may occur in the future.

This is what i believe is a Dom/me's responsibily is to a sub once we have been given the gift of their submission

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

That's your responsibilty as her partner.

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By *ensualMan
over a year ago

Sutton

The responsibilities of the dom/me are those negotiated with the sub on a peer to peer and real world basis.

It seems to many people on both sides of the divide go biblical on how a D/S relationship should be without knowing the actual parties wants and needs.

When I say both sides of the divide there is the "subs are made of fairy dust" side and the "thrash'em and use them" side, and both are dictating a one size fits all approach to a D/S relationship.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That's your responsibilty as her partner."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wouldn’t it be personal to each individual and couple? As long as it’s spoken about openly and honestly and everyone is happy and it’s SSC then it’s extremely flexible, the only ones that annoy me personally are the 50 shaders who seem to think a film is their bible

Otherwise chill and have fun together

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

What is odd to me is how some people treat a dynamic as a noun, i.e something you can touch, walk around or put into a wheelbarrow.

The dynamic is not set in stone, to me it is a dance between two people, if one is doing the waltz and the other doing the jive.... well.

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

"That's your responsibilty as her partner."

This...

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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago

Up on them there hills

"That's your responsibilty as her partner.

This..."

I, the male fell very ill a little while ago, the submissive I was in a relationship wanted to be part of where I was. It wasn’t what we agreed.

It came to a point where I stopped the relationship.

Cross boundaries, that is not a D/s relationship.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What is odd to me is how some people treat a dynamic as a noun, i.e something you can touch, walk around or put into a wheelbarrow.

The dynamic is not set in stone, to me it is a dance between two people, if one is doing the waltz and the other doing the jive.... well."

So true....it’s a living evolving expression of trust and intimacy and if you have found the right partner it can be the most thoughtful and loving relationship you will ever experience....especially if you switch....I love the dance ????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Surely that is what all couples do? If one of you is ill you support them. D/s is irrelevant to that. It;s just about being a decent partner and human being.

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By *wizzlenipsMan
over a year ago

Newport

This is what i believe is a Dom/me's responsibily is to a sub once we have been given the gift of their submission

Nothing at all to do with being her Dom and everything to do with being her partner.

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