FabSwingers.com forum: Bi and stigma attached

By *istressdandsubt OP Couple
over a year ago

caterham

Why on a sex site, to explore fantasys are people so judgmental about being bisexual.

Surley if you don't want to meet bi people you can say so but you don't have to be rude to them..

It seems to be fine for women to be bi but not for guys, yet so many women seen to get turned on by two guys playing together

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why on a sex site, to explore fantasys are people so judgmental about being bisexual.

Surley if you don't want to meet bi people you can say so but you don't have to be rude to them..

It seems to be fine for women to be bi but not for guys, yet so many women seen to get turned on by two guys playing together"

as primarly it WAS AND IS a swing site. but i agree whatever site it is. should be no judgements or stigmas

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By *ogfox1469Man
over a year ago

Westerham

"Why on a sex site, to explore fantasys are people so judgmental about being bisexual.

Surley if you don't want to meet bi people you can say so but you don't have to be rude to them..

It seems to be fine for women to be bi but not for guys, yet so many women seen to get turned on by two guys playing together"

Totally agree xx

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By *lice AgainTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol

I hear you.

It's so much of a stigma that I get messaged by 'straight' guys all the time who tell me they've put down 'straight' so as to not put women off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They'd get more intetest if they were actually honest

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They'd get more intetest if they were actually honest

i think many would

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By *ustaceSmithMan
over a year ago

Woodbridge

I wonder to whom the taboo attaches: is it the M or the F who fears homoeroticism (which I believe is universal, depending on personal attraction).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think men who are unsure about their sexuality fear bi men, hence the negative attitude.

Really can't understand why the mere presence of a bi man should freak them out so much but it does.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bi, bearded, hairy and into cd. Now there appears to be issues with this as a combination?? Each to their own I say and enjoy life x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is it not a fear of being caught by friends, family and colleagues? A bi male wouldn't stop us meeting at all as long as they were respectful of Mr S's straight status. Those who enjoy their privacy would be mortified at being the chat of the tea room, even more so if outed as Bi when the closet door is firmly kept shut.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

unfortunately we do live in a very judgemental society.Each to their own ,as long as everyone is enjoying their fun.im a striaght bicurious guy love the thought of playing with another guy whilst a lady watches before she becomes the centre of attention ..thats just my two peneth

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everyone is who they are nothing wrong if someone doesn't like it then that's their problem enjoy life it's to short to care what others think

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why on a sex site, to explore fantasys are people so judgmental about being bisexual.

Surley if you don't want to meet bi people you can say so but you don't have to be rude to them..

It seems to be fine for women to be bi but not for guys, yet so many women seen to get turned on by two guys playing together"

I think it taps into the hidden depths of fear as if someone defines themselves as bi they are a threat to both the male and female, neither can be sure of who the attraction would be for and as such who they may attach too. I think it's also a stigma certainly from a faith point of view as most religions/faiths reject this as even a possible existence. As I have said before all labels are a spectrum anyway so everyone's view of a bi label will be different.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I never thought I’d ever have sex with another guy . In the heat of the moment with a couple had my first bi experience . I have played with a few bi couples since but never 1 on 1 with a guy . The last couple I was with said I was situationally bisexual .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why on a sex site, to explore fantasys are people so judgmental about being bisexual.

Surley if you don't want to meet bi people you can say so but you don't have to be rude to them..

It seems to be fine for women to be bi but not for guys, yet so many women seen to get turned on by two guys playing together

as primarly it WAS AND IS a swing site. but i agree whatever site it is. should be no judgements or stigmas"

can swingers not be bi?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You’d think nowadays a stigma could be laser removed......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why on a sex site, to explore fantasys are people so judgmental about being bisexual.

Surley if you don't want to meet bi people you can say so but you don't have to be rude to them..

It seems to be fine for women to be bi but not for guys, yet so many women seen to get turned on by two guys playing together"

Yet for some women it's not so fine to be bi,and for some men it's not so fine to be bi.

As a bi man you have your choices and surely straight people should be afforded their choices.

Yes there's absolutely no excuse to be rude to anyone.

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By *ightboy69Man
over a year ago

Torquay

For years FF play has always been seen as erotic whereas MM play has a stigma of being dirty and should not be seen . This was heightened by the porn industry

There is still a rediculous amount of men on here who list as straight but are either fully bi or bi c but lie on the profile as 1 fella told me I don't want people knowing I enjoy cock !!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why on a sex site, to explore fantasys are people so judgmental about being bisexual.

Surley if you don't want to meet bi people you can say so but you don't have to be rude to them..

It seems to be fine for women to be bi but not for guys, yet so many women seen to get turned on by two guys playing together"

I guess swingers are just people and some people like to judge. We prefer to leave people to get on with their own fun but hey.

As for bisexual experimentation, we love it. This site has given Gaston loads of opportunities to enjoy some sexy with guys and MissJ has certainly enjoyed watching that. We also find our threesomes are so hot when the second guy is bi - not just the man on man stuff but things like a 70 when we can all let go.

My recommendation would always be to give it a try (but I’m filthy).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"For years FF play has always been seen as erotic whereas MM play has a stigma of being dirty and should not be seen . This was heightened by the porn industry

There is still a rediculous amount of men on here who list as straight but are either fully bi or bi c but lie on the profile as 1 fella told me I don't want people knowing I enjoy cock !!! "

So true and we know loads of straight guys who enjoy a bit of cock. They seem to like giving most too!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You’d think nowadays a stigma could be laser removed......"

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By *uckbuddies321Couple
over a year ago

Leeds

Going to Quest for Bi Tuesdays has made me more open about being bi. I'm now happy to invite guys to play with my cock - and Sal loves to watch. I really want to come in a guy's mouth as he fucks Sal.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why on a sex site, to explore fantasys are people so judgmental about being bisexual.

Surley if you don't want to meet bi people you can say so but you don't have to be rude to them..

It seems to be fine for women to be bi but not for guys, yet so many women seen to get turned on by two guys playing together"

Here here!!

It’s so bi guy phobic

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By *oss and SuzieCouple
over a year ago

Porthmadog

Happily bi guy here and agree with you all xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have met bi guys not because they are bi we just didn’t read the profiles

.. but David is totally straight and will not let another guy touch his cock ( even though some have tried ) it would be better if people were more honest on here then you can filter out people better .

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By *ork PoppazCouple
over a year ago

Cleckheaton

Had a few bi fem experiences but never bi male but wouldn't rule it out, we are here to enjoy life and never say never

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Two widely believed fab ‘truths’:

Bi men will inevitably get hard at the sight of the straight mans body and will probably try to enter it ‘accidentally’.

Women don’t want to meet bi men (often linked with vague muttering about disease).

I have heard both views frequently.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel sorry for bi-men here, so many profiles of women and couples seem to shun them as if they are some kind of untouchables or something.

Though just having anal as an interest is enough to put a lot of people off. Like no, if your not into it I'm not going to try it.

People need to learn that an interest or sexual orientation isn't a 'must do' situation and is merely just a preference.

It's 2018, get with the times.

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By *ampolCouple
over a year ago

Stevenage

"Is it not a fear of being caught by friends, family and colleagues? A bi male wouldn't stop us meeting at all as long as they were respectful of Mr S's straight status. Those who enjoy their privacy would be mortified at being the chat of the tea room, even more so if outed as Bi when the closet door is firmly kept shut."

this is so true...

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By *aughterMan
over a year ago

skelmersdale

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By *arkside2698Man
over a year ago

luton

Definite double standards regarding male and felmales being bi. Bi males tend to be stigmatised whereas it's almost a requirement on here for a female to be bi. If a straight couple meet a bi male and he understands the couple are straight, he's hardly going to pounce on the male! Also when couples add a third, it's more conducive to a better experience as they clearly won't worry about swords crossing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We only really play with bi guys as straight guys only want Mrs Fanta lol x

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By *BWarksCouple
over a year ago

warwick

We tend to think it’s the guys who don’t like bi guys...... it turns us off if we read a profile where they expressly say they don’t like bi guys

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By *ibsonVicMan
over a year ago

Minworth

[Removed by poster at 15/08/18 15:08:00]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Going to Quest for Bi Tuesdays has made me more open about being bi. I'm now happy to invite guys to play with my cock - and Sal loves to watch. I really want to come in a guy's mouth as he fucks Sal."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why on a sex site, to explore fantasys are people so judgmental about being bisexual.

Surley if you don't want to meet bi people you can say so but you don't have to be rude to them..

It seems to be fine for women to be bi but not for guys, yet so many women seen to get turned on by two guys playing together

Here here!!

It’s so bi guy phobic"

Why is it biphobic if the thought of 2 men together doesn't turn them on?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why on a sex site, to explore fantasys are people so judgmental about being bisexual.

Surley if you don't want to meet bi people you can say so but you don't have to be rude to them..

It seems to be fine for women to be bi but not for guys, yet so many women seen to get turned on by two guys playing together"

How are they rude to them?

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By *agermeisterMan
over a year ago

Leeds

But if 'straight' guys get too close to bi guys they will catch the Gay

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By *lice AgainTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol

"But if 'straight' guys get too close to bi guys they will catch the Gay

Lol, but bi guys like women too?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Totally agree with OP bi guys are not for us and clearly stated on our profile but still they contact us lol chancing their arm lol

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By *ickygirl41Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Why on a sex site, to explore fantasys are people so judgmental about being bisexual.

Surley if you don't want to meet bi people you can say so but you don't have to be rude to them..

It seems to be fine for women to be bi but not for guys, yet so many women seen to get turned on by two guys playing together"

100% this!

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By *iveshowcoupleCouple
over a year ago

glasgow

"Why on a sex site, to explore fantasys are people so judgmental about being bisexual.

Surley if you don't want to meet bi people you can say so but you don't have to be rude to them..

It seems to be fine for women to be bi but not for guys, yet so many women seen to get turned on by two guys playing together

Here here!!

It’s so bi guy phobic

Why is it biphobic if the thought of 2 men together doesn't turn them on?"

From the many similar posts on this topic it seams that preferences are perfectly acceptable.

Except when it excludes bi guys. That is considered homophobic

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By *nEnglishmanAbroadMan
over a year ago

Hartburn

I was originally on the site as straight, for the usual fear of putting people off (particularly single women), but over time I realised, as OP said, what’s the point of being on a site like this if I’m not able to be honest about my sexuality and what turns me on? I prefer to avoid labels altogether, whether straight/bi/gay/etc - I just like to have fun with other fun (non judgmental) people of all varieties and persuasions. And frankly, if being honest about that does end up putting some people off, well that’s for the best because I wouldn’t be compatible with those people anyway. Even on Fab, life should be about quality, not quantity!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"But if 'straight' guys get too close to bi guys they will catch the Gay

Lol, but bi guys like women too?"

No, it’s just a pretence to get at all those hunks of straight masculinity..

Once they’re all in bed together she’ll be booted to the side while he converts the guy to the joys of sweet, sweet man lurve..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have seen alot of women saying they don't like bi guys because they want manly men, I don't know why being bi... Or even gay, would make a man less manly, mincing about and talking in a high pitched voice is not mandatory for either. I have met some very manly bi men tyvm! Also alot of straight men seem to assume that if a bi man wants to play with him and his Mrs that he obviously would fancy him aswell and won't be able to keep his hands to himself or something

But alot of people (off site) assume that if you are bi and you are on a site like this then you have to fuck every human being you come across, cannot be trusted with friends or their husbands or wives and all kinds of other stupid crap. The fact that people who are on here and still believe some of this kind of silliness is beyond me

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By *cutebum9Couple
over a year ago

wallsend

"I have seen alot of women saying they don't like bi guys because they want manly men, I don't know why being bi... Or even gay, would make a man less manly, mincing about and talking in a high pitched voice is not mandatory for either. I have met some very manly bi men tyvm! Also alot of straight men seem to assume that if a bi man wants to play with him and his Mrs that he obviously would fancy him aswell and won't be able to keep his hands to himself or something

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By *hebagsCouple
over a year ago

worcestershire

Well said,we're both bi..and proud of it..bi couples only for us...so many people contact us for a meet..with "straight " profiles...then say..ohh ,we're really bi..but it keeps our options open,couples too.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why on a sex site, to explore fantasys are people so judgmental about being bisexual.

Surley if you don't want to meet bi people you can say so but you don't have to be rude to them..

It seems to be fine for women to be bi but not for guys, yet so many women seen to get turned on by two guys playing together

Here here!!

It’s so bi guy phobic

Why is it biphobic if the thought of 2 men together doesn't turn them on?

From the many similar posts on this topic it seams that preferences are perfectly acceptable.

Except when it excludes bi guys. That is considered homophobic

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have seen a profile with "we don't meet vile bi men" view us! It's not as though we don't advertise our preference

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"But if 'straight' guys get too close to bi guys they will catch the Gay

Lol, but bi guys like women too?"

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By *abrielle247Couple (FF)
over a year ago

PDI Gran Canaria

Here's an interesting fact, there are straight couples that won't entertain bi guys and yet we have had the husbands message us and play with us. They say please don't leave verification though as the wife will find out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We have met bi guys not because they are bi we just didn’t read the profiles

As a bi guy if I chose to play with a couple with a straight guy I would make sure that I don’t break his consent. To me being bi is a personal thing but I respect everyone’s personal space.

If the guy is bi well then there is no problem.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why on a sex site, to explore fantasys are people so judgmental about being bisexual.

Surley if you don't want to meet bi people you can say so but you don't have to be rude to them..

It seems to be fine for women to be bi but not for guys, yet so many women seen to get turned on by two guys playing together

Here here!!

It’s so bi guy phobic

Why is it biphobic if the thought of 2 men together doesn't turn them on?

From the many similar posts on this topic it seams that preferences are perfectly acceptable.

Except when it excludes bi guys. That is considered homophobic

It is bi guy phobic because many women and couples have no interest in them despite the fact bi only means they are happy to play with both sexes.

I thought this site was for communication and seeing what would happen in meets. Then when you meet you respect the boundaries that have been set.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think that the opposite of what you've said

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By *hloevtTV/TS
over a year ago

norwich

I have loads of chats on here and meets with couples and "straight" men, never had anything nasty or anti bi happen. Yet. X

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By *irtySekretsCouple
over a year ago

Filthy Desires Upon Trent

There always has and always will be a Stigma about 2 guys having sex, at whatever level.

If people don’t want to meet us because of their choice then so be it.

Mind you, they are missing out on some pretty awesome Sex and fun as we Bi Folks are generally very sexy and dirty little Fuckers

xxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There should be absolutely no judgements.

On a site like this you’d think people would be far more open minded and “accepting” of kinks & sexuality.

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By *ncorMan
over a year ago

Ipswich

"Why on a sex site, to explore fantasys are people so judgmental about being bisexual.

Surley if you don't want to meet bi people you can say so but you don't have to be rude to them..

It seems to be fine for women to be bi but not for guys, yet so many women seen to get turned on by two guys playing together

as primarly it WAS AND IS a swing site. but i agree whatever site it is. should be no judgements or stigmas"

Agree, rudeness is what is says, plus if you don't ask you'll never know if you like

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By *iveshowcoupleCouple
over a year ago

glasgow

"Why on a sex site, to explore fantasys are people so judgmental about being bisexual.

Surley if you don't want to meet bi people you can say so but you don't have to be rude to them..

It seems to be fine for women to be bi but not for guys, yet so many women seen to get turned on by two guys playing together

Here here!!

It’s so bi guy phobic

Why is it biphobic if the thought of 2 men together doesn't turn them on?

From the many similar posts on this topic it seams that preferences are perfectly acceptable.

Except when it excludes bi guys. That is considered homophobic

It is bi guy phobic because many women and couples have no interest in them despite the fact bi only means they are happy to play with both sexes.

I thought this site was for communication and seeing what would happen in meets. Then when you meet you respect the boundaries that have been set.

This website is about communicating yes but supposedly towards exploring sexual fantasies. We have heaps.

Equally there are lots of fetishes we share no interest in. There are lots and lots of members on this site who are a much better fit than bi guys.

Why would we waste time on meeting no doubt lovely people with whom we have no or little shared interest.

And why do bi guys start throwing the word phobic about just because they get a no thanks. Go ahead and chat to the many couples who are keen to meet bi guys and stop name calling those with different preferences.

Frankly it does your case no good at all.

Ps talking about boundries once you meet is way too late. Think about it for a moment and I am sure you will agree.

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By *DSM - CUCKOLD - COUPLECouple
over a year ago

manchester

Like spaghetti we are all straight till wet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bi guy's all the way i say lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Two widely believed fab ‘truths’:

Bi men will inevitably get hard at the sight of the straight mans body and will probably try to enter it ‘accidentally’.

Women don’t want to meet bi men (often linked with vague muttering about disease).

I have heard both views frequently."

Ive heard women say they will not meet bi men for that reason even tho they are bi themselves.

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By *rwolfMan
over a year ago

bristol

"Why on a sex site, to explore fantasys are people so judgmental about being bisexual.

Surley if you don't want to meet bi people you can say so but you don't have to be rude to them..

It seems to be fine for women to be bi but not for guys, yet so many women seen to get turned on by two guys playing together"

How much of it though is predetermined programming. By that i mean girl on girl is more readily availible than anything else. This then gets put out as socially acceptable to the masses where as guy on guy isnt so out there.

Go on a retro hunt... Go back to the 50s, 60s in porn, its always girl on girl. So it gets programmed into us that this is "normal" and socially acceptable.

As for guy on guy being stigmatized again its how it's portrayed from school boy to man... Its hammered in by knuckle draggers its "wrong" and "not right" so again from that aspect alone its hammered in as a negative.

Slowly with pride week the world is changing and it will take time and effort from both sides (men and women) to allow that perspective to be changed.

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By *ung_londonMan
over a year ago

London

"Why on a sex site, to explore fantasys are people so judgmental about being bisexual.

Surley if you don't want to meet bi people you can say so but you don't have to be rude to them..

It seems to be fine for women to be bi but not for guys, yet so many women seen to get turned on by two guys playing together"

Although it feels like there is a bigger taboo around two men having sexual contact than two women, It’s also clear that there are lots of people (male and female) on this site who find it fun. I wonder if there’s a tendency for some people to identify their erotic interests through exclusion (no x, no people who are y etc) while others explore it more by expressing what they do like (I am really into people who are z etc). The way the exclusion is expressed might feel more hostile than intended, maybe? I sometimes feel reading the forums that some fabbers are convinced there must be a secret formula to find connections which they need to crack - be straight but say you’re bi / be bi but say you’re straight... The sensible advice which people always rightly give is ‘be honest and be yourself’ but maybe that’s when the ‘excluding’ posts feel most frustrating? I know there are plenty of people on here who won’t be into me sexually at all, and that’s no sweat. But maybe that’s easier to say when you’ve met a few nice folks who are into you? No-one has a right to a shag after all...

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By *rMardyMsGrimmCouple
over a year ago

near yonder

Makes finding them bloody hard too!

We are looking for bi, but if the profile says straight what are we to do?!

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By *inks_apeyCouple
over a year ago

Staffordshire

We're both bi, and if people don't like it tough.

Amazing how many people message us saying they are bi, or curious and have straight on profile though. I thought in the more open eyed world it was less of a stigma, oh well

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi this is a problem I have had all my life. Being a Bi guy you can get so much abuse and a lot of women are disgusted by it. Luckily I have a playmate who thinks its hot and she is bi too.

I have had bi phobia from gay guys too...one day this will all change I hope

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

There are clubs that don't like sex between guys, except if they should have a bi event night. People who retain anti bi attitudes are becoming fossils before their time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Like spaghetti we are all straight till wet

Well this made me chuckle

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"But if 'straight' guys get too close to bi guys they will catch the Gay

but don't you know, the gayness is highly infectious ! Touch a cock once and you could end up gay lol! Playing with fire!

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By *inks_apeyCouple
over a year ago

Staffordshire

"But if 'straight' guys get too close to bi guys they will catch the Gay

but don't you know, the gayness is highly infectious ! Touch a cock once and you could end up gay lol! Playing with fire!

Yeah it's funny, if we are playing with a couple that's not bi, then we just don't go there, it's simple, but just because I am bi doesn't mean that I'm going to force it on people lol

Amazing how ignorant people are to sexuality still in this day and age.

Thankfully the younger generations seem to be far more tolerant, so there is hope for humanity yet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find it frustrating when a couple won’t talk because they might feel threatened or worried I’d touch him.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Has anyone who's read this thread changed their status from straight?

Has anyone who's phobic about bi changed their mind a bit?

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By *pertureTV/TS
over a year ago

New Ferry, wirral in stockings and sussies

Ive had abusive messages merely for looking at someones profile, but it doesnt bother me anymore, I just go back and fab their pics, (if im not blocked) and if people dont like bi guys, would you want to meet them anyway, i sure wouldnt.

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By *renshiiCouple
over a year ago

Dartford

"Why on a sex site, to explore fantasys are people so judgmental about being bisexual.

Surley if you don't want to meet bi people you can say so but you don't have to be rude to them..

It seems to be fine for women to be bi but not for guys, yet so many women seen to get turned on by two guys playing together"

Couldn't agree more. But then, people who express such bigotry display wonderful huge red flags for who they are and you can just avoid them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why on a sex site, to explore fantasys are people so judgmental about being bisexual.

Surley if you don't want to meet bi people you can say so but you don't have to be rude to them..

It seems to be fine for women to be bi but not for guys, yet so many women seen to get turned on by two guys playing together"
People judge fact of life you can't thwart human nature and especially in this world

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've always been honest on my profile, I don't why women in general shy away. You think an opener like respecting women would be a main thing that would attract women to you, but apparently not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've always had it in my profile text that I'm bi and have now added bi to my title text.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im honest on my profile that im bi, i dont have any reason to hide it, but i keep my guy on guy pictures private as i find it puts straight couples and women off.

A few months ago a couple spoke to me about this topic and the reason they wouldnt meet bi guys. It was to do with the stigma of HIV to them. I dont really get much action on the straight side of things so i cant comment on it, but i can say the amount of unprotected sex i see in the gay/bi side of things is worrying, guys who meet at cruisibg spots who dont know each other are far to willing to have unprotected sex.

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By *hoot45Man
over a year ago

Ramsgate

"For years FF play has always been seen as erotic whereas MM play has a stigma of being dirty and should not be seen . This was heightened by the porn industry

There is still a rediculous amount of men on here who list as straight but are either fully bi or bi c but lie on the profile as 1 fella told me I don't want people knowing I enjoy cock !!!

So true and we know loads of straight guys who enjoy a bit of cock. They seem to like giving most too!"

You can’t generalise but there are a fair number of guys out there who enjoy some cock fun but there’s no indication of it on their profile. If guys have looked at my profile a few times then I’ve started to get cheeky and send them a message. Everyone has their reasons for the way they present themselves so if they want to keep it quiet then that’s fine with me. I’ve had some very horny meets with straight guys

lol

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