FabSwingers.com forum: Getting into the club scene

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I’m new to the whole community as you can tell by the age, but I just don’t really know how to start.

I know about one club in Derby called the attic and it sounds right up my street, been wanting to go for a while. Although I’m not sure wether to go for it alone or meet someone or a couple to introduce me to the scene.

The thing is with that is I’ve been trying for ages to find a couple or a fwb to go with, and a big factor I think is my age. I get a lot of people turning me down straight away because of this factor. Do you think that age matters in the community?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I took the plunge and went as a single male to my local club, loved it and am now a club regular. Go for it

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

very confident of you to face it in your own, don’t know if I’d be able to do it you know. But I think that’s because I don’t really know what to expect. Are people quite welcoming to new comers?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Put on your big boy pants, if you own any, and try it out. What's the worse that can happen?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

nice cheers

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By *orkie321bWoman
over a year ago

Nottingham

OP you will definitely find it difficult to find someone to escort you to a club for your first visit and that is nothing at all to do with your age.

We frequently see single men asking for someone to take them to a club and the advice they always get is to just go by themselves (usually put in less friendly terms such as "grow a pair")

The thing is many clubs have membership restrictions and waiting lists for men, although the attic doesn't. Lots of guys want a lady to take them to bypass these requirements. Also many want to couple up for the night just to get in cheaper. They also assume they are guaranteed a fuck if they have a lady with them.

If you're not too far from the attic just pop along and check it out, Saturday nights are always the busiest and most fun imo. Tell them it's your first visit and ask for a tour - they will show you around and explain the rules and etiquette.

The club doesn't have an alcohol licence so take a drink with you if you want one. Don't get pissed though as nobody finds that sexy and you may be asked to leave.

Be friendly, chatty and sociable and don't follow people around. Just go for a look around and to get a feel for the place, if you get to play that's a bonus. I did just that and didn't want to play on my first visit and everyone was very respectful of my decision.

It's normal to be nervous - if you weren't I would think there was something wrong with you. I still get nervous sometimes visiting clubs and I've been going 2 years

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By *aucyknickersWoman
over a year ago

Midlands ish

Haha, I’m a woman and still can’t find someone I genuinely like to go with and I don’t have the lady balls to go alone!

Good luck OP, will be watching with interest!

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By *inkynudeMan
over a year ago

London

I went through the same thing.

Eventually I found the least busy time possible and went for it. It turned out super boring because there was almost nobody there... but it gave me the confidence to go back at a busier time and soon after that I got hooked.

Nowadays, every time I travel, I get super excited looking for clubs that I can go to for the firsr time.

My advice is to lower your expectations. Just go to watch and feel the vibes. Get to the club close to the opening time as it will be mostly empty. Get comfortable with the surroundings and take it one step at a time. But don’t wait for someone to “take you” or you might lose the chance altogether.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"OP you will definitely find it difficult to find someone to escort you to a club for your first visit and that is nothing at all to do with your age.

We frequently see single men asking for someone to take them to a club and the advice they always get is to just go by themselves (usually put in less friendly terms such as "grow a pair")

The club doesn't have an alcohol licence so take a drink with you if you want one. Don't get pissed though as nobody finds that sexy and you may be asked to leave.

It's normal to be nervous - if you weren't I would think there was something wrong with you. I still get nervous sometimes visiting clubs and I've been going 2 years

Thanks so much for this reply, definitely going to help me out in the near future

)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Haha, I’m a woman and still can’t find someone I genuinely like to go with and I don’t have the lady balls to go alone!

Good luck OP, will be watching with interest!"

Glad to hear there is someone else in the same boat as me haha

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