Join us FREE, we're FREE to use
Web's largest swingers site since 2006.
Already registered?
Login here
Join us FREE, we're FREE to use
Web's largest swingers site since 2006.
Already registered?
Login here
 | Back to forum list |
| Back to Swingers Chat |
| Jump to newest |  |
 | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"It's a combination. The primary drive is genetic but then you have a reproductive strategy of how you want to meet that primary drive. So then you are looking at your environment trying to judge women that fit, and are responsive to your strategy. You'll pick up on this subconsciously before you do consciously and hence feel very exited by certain women who are responding to your call to come hither. " That's all very fair and well to say but can you actually form the argument to say that? For example. By what mechanism do my genes get to "know" (genes can't actually know anything because they're just molecules) her genes are a good match? Is it a good guess based merely on outward evidence of her body? Or do my cells detect some kind of frequency vibration coming from her cells that suggests a good match? If you can't answer this initial hurdle you can't posit the rest of the chain you've proposed, other than to suggest it as conjecture | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"It's a combination. The primary drive is genetic but then you have a reproductive strategy of how you want to meet that primary drive. So then you are looking at your environment trying to judge women that fit, and are responsive to your strategy. You'll pick up on this subconsciously before you do consciously and hence feel very exited by certain women who are responding to your call to come hither. That's all very fair and well to say but can you actually form the argument to say that? For example. By what mechanism do my genes get to "know" (genes can't actually know anything because they're just molecules) her genes are a good match? Is it a good guess based merely on outward evidence of her body? Or do my cells detect some kind of frequency vibration coming from her cells that suggests a good match? If you can't answer this initial hurdle you can't posit the rest of the chain you've proposed, other than to suggest it as conjecture " Why is your response only about genes when i offered you a dynamic system with at least 3 variables | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"It's a combination. The primary drive is genetic but then you have a reproductive strategy of how you want to meet that primary drive. So then you are looking at your environment trying to judge women that fit, and are responsive to your strategy. You'll pick up on this subconsciously before you do consciously and hence feel very exited by certain women who are responding to your call to come hither. That's all very fair and well to say but can you actually form the argument to say that? For example. By what mechanism do my genes get to "know" (genes can't actually know anything because they're just molecules) her genes are a good match? Is it a good guess based merely on outward evidence of her body? Or do my cells detect some kind of frequency vibration coming from her cells that suggests a good match? If you can't answer this initial hurdle you can't posit the rest of the chain you've proposed, other than to suggest it as conjecture Why is your response only about genes when i offered you a dynamic system with at least 3 variables " Your reply came in the form of a final authoritative answer. It appeared to centre on notions of genetic fitness and advantage and reproductive suitability. If you can't frame an argument that my genes detect that hers are advantageous then genes can't be anything to do with it. If instead it is just a guess based on body shape it doesn't answer why all women with the same shape aren't equally attractive to me. It seems clear to me that another equally plausible solution is spiritual and energetic. Your reply didn't take that into consideration. That's all  | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"It's a combination. The primary drive is genetic but then you have a reproductive strategy of how you want to meet that primary drive. So then you are looking at your environment trying to judge women that fit, and are responsive to your strategy. You'll pick up on this subconsciously before you do consciously and hence feel very exited by certain women who are responding to your call to come hither. That's all very fair and well to say but can you actually form the argument to say that? For example. By what mechanism do my genes get to "know" (genes can't actually know anything because they're just molecules) her genes are a good match? Is it a good guess based merely on outward evidence of her body? Or do my cells detect some kind of frequency vibration coming from her cells that suggests a good match? If you can't answer this initial hurdle you can't posit the rest of the chain you've proposed, other than to suggest it as conjecture " As with most of the animal kingdom it's down to smell...Pheromones to be more precise. There's been a few documentaries about attraction and one of the theories was that we 'look' for partners that complete the missing (not that we know they're missing) elements from our personal genome so the offspring becomes a more perfect example of us to take forward. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"It's a combination. The primary drive is genetic but then you have a reproductive strategy of how you want to meet that primary drive. So then you are looking at your environment trying to judge women that fit, and are responsive to your strategy. You'll pick up on this subconsciously before you do consciously and hence feel very exited by certain women who are responding to your call to come hither. That's all very fair and well to say but can you actually form the argument to say that? For example. By what mechanism do my genes get to "know" (genes can't actually know anything because they're just molecules) her genes are a good match? Is it a good guess based merely on outward evidence of her body? Or do my cells detect some kind of frequency vibration coming from her cells that suggests a good match? If you can't answer this initial hurdle you can't posit the rest of the chain you've proposed, other than to suggest it as conjecture Why is your response only about genes when i offered you a dynamic system with at least 3 variables Your reply came in the form of a final authoritative answer. It appeared to centre on notions of genetic fitness and advantage and reproductive suitability. If you can't frame an argument that my genes detect that hers are advantageous then genes can't be anything to do with it. If instead it is just a guess based on body shape it doesn't answer why all women with the same shape aren't equally attractive to me. It seems clear to me that another equally plausible solution is spiritual and energetic. Your reply didn't take that into consideration. That's all "But again, I'm talking about a dynamic system with multiple variables. You're focussing on one part and trying to claim it's responsible for the combined effect, that doesn't make any sense. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"But again, I'm talking about a dynamic system with multiple variables. You're focussing on one part and trying to claim it's responsible for the combined effect, that doesn't make any sense. " Merely doing the reductive thing of pointing out that you can't postulate the influence of various forces if you can't explain the mechanisms of one of them  | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"As with most of the animal kingdom it's down to smell...Pheromones to be more precise. There's been a few documentaries about attraction and one of the theories was that we 'look' for partners that complete the missing (not that we know they're missing) elements from our personal genome so the offspring becomes a more perfect example of us to take forward." You should be careful about how you talk of science. The mere existence of theories on something (albeit scientific theories) does not render it so. You can't go from "there's a theory we smell it" to "it's all down to smell". The correct formulation is "some scientists currently believe it's all down to smell". That vital open mindedness is both more accurate, more conducive to inquisitive rational and critical debate, and more scientific  | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"It's a combination. The primary drive is genetic but then you have a reproductive strategy of how you want to meet that primary drive. So then you are looking at your environment trying to judge women that fit, and are responsive to your strategy. You'll pick up on this subconsciously before you do consciously and hence feel very exited by certain women who are responding to your call to come hither. " This is incorrect, there could be identical twins and you could only be attracted to one of them. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"It's a combination. The primary drive is genetic but then you have a reproductive strategy of how you want to meet that primary drive. So then you are looking at your environment trying to judge women that fit, and are responsive to your strategy. You'll pick up on this subconsciously before you do consciously and hence feel very exited by certain women who are responding to your call to come hither. This is incorrect, there could be identical twins and you could only be attracted to one of them. " Is that so? That would be weird if that's the case  It would entirely kill the whole evolutionary physical argument. Anyone got a link to anything on this? Or any experience of it? | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"It's a combination. The primary drive is genetic but then you have a reproductive strategy of how you want to meet that primary drive. So then you are looking at your environment trying to judge women that fit, and are responsive to your strategy. You'll pick up on this subconsciously before you do consciously and hence feel very exited by certain women who are responding to your call to come hither. This is incorrect, there could be identical twins and you could only be attracted to one of them. Is that so? That would be weird if that's the case It would entirely kill the whole evolutionary physical argument. Anyone got a link to anything on this? Or any experience of it? "My ex sis in law is married to an identical twin. She met both together on a night out but only fancied one. I think the other is more attractive but he’s a tight arse.  | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"It's a combination. The primary drive is genetic but then you have a reproductive strategy of how you want to meet that primary drive. So then you are looking at your environment trying to judge women that fit, and are responsive to your strategy. You'll pick up on this subconsciously before you do consciously and hence feel very exited by certain women who are responding to your call to come hither. This is incorrect, there could be identical twins and you could only be attracted to one of them. Is that so? That would be weird if that's the case It would entirely kill the whole evolutionary physical argument. Anyone got a link to anything on this? Or any experience of it?
My ex sis in law is married to an identical twin. She met both together on a night out but only fancied one. I think the other is more attractive but he’s a tight arse. "Couldn’t he take your massive strap on ? | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"It's a combination. The primary drive is genetic but then you have a reproductive strategy of how you want to meet that primary drive. So then you are looking at your environment trying to judge women that fit, and are responsive to your strategy. You'll pick up on this subconsciously before you do consciously and hence feel very exited by certain women who are responding to your call to come hither. This is incorrect, there could be identical twins and you could only be attracted to one of them. Is that so? That would be weird if that's the case It would entirely kill the whole evolutionary physical argument. Anyone got a link to anything on this? Or any experience of it? "No it wouldn't because again, I didn't say attraction was 100% genetic. Which is a strawman that all your criticism rests upon. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"But again, I'm talking about a dynamic system with multiple variables. You're focussing on one part and trying to claim it's responsible for the combined effect, that doesn't make any sense. Merely doing the reductive thing of pointing out that you can't postulate the influence of various forces if you can't explain the mechanisms of one of them "That isn't very logical | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"It's a combination. The primary drive is genetic but then you have a reproductive strategy of how you want to meet that primary drive. So then you are looking at your environment trying to judge women that fit, and are responsive to your strategy. You'll pick up on this subconsciously before you do consciously and hence feel very exited by certain women who are responding to your call to come hither. This is incorrect, there could be identical twins and you could only be attracted to one of them. Is that so? That would be weird if that's the case It would entirely kill the whole evolutionary physical argument. Anyone got a link to anything on this? Or any experience of it?
No it wouldn't because again, I didn't say attraction was 100% genetic. Which is a strawman that all your criticism rests upon. "I think it depends on what you’re looking for at the time If you’re after a long term , safe and secure relationship where sex isn’t the number one thing , it’ll be a different type to who you are p looking for if you haven’t cum for a few days . A great example of this was when I got with my wife some eight years ago . I’d been on dating sites and got fed up of the coldness of it all . I stopped going on them and asked S out , who wasn't into the goth look then , Infact she didn’t wear make up at all . Very plain , but just what I needed at the time . Fast forward six months and she got into the make up , goth look ( which I love ) , stockings etc.... another six months and we started swinging . So the initial attraction was completely different to the current attraction which came with time . Equally as strong now and we’ve been married for nearly six years now | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
" You should be careful about how you talk of science. The mere existence of theories on something (albeit scientific theories) does not render it so. You can't go from "there's a theory we smell it" to "it's all down to smell". The correct formulation is "some scientists currently believe it's all down to smell". That vital open mindedness is both more accurate, more conducive to inquisitive rational and critical debate, and more scientific "You asked a different poster above for 'a reason' and I believe that is what I gave you. I didn't realise that we were in a court of law or scientific symposium. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"It's a combination. The primary drive is genetic but then you have a reproductive strategy of how you want to meet that primary drive. So then you are looking at your environment trying to judge women that fit, and are responsive to your strategy. You'll pick up on this subconsciously before you do consciously and hence feel very exited by certain women who are responding to your call to come hither. This is incorrect, there could be identical twins and you could only be attracted to one of them. Is that so? That would be weird if that's the case It would entirely kill the whole evolutionary physical argument. Anyone got a link to anything on this? Or any experience of it?
No it wouldn't because again, I didn't say attraction was 100% genetic. Which is a strawman that all your criticism rests upon. "I'm not criticising. Merely asking an open minded question. Surely the whole point with evolution is that it happens all the time? Either we're attracted to people for evolutionary reasons or we're not. I can't see how some half way fudge where it only happens sometimes works. If there is no discernable physical difference between two women and yet I only find one of them attractive that must mean genes, child bearing hips, etc have absolutely no part to play in attraction. If they did I'd be at least mildly attracted to the twin. If I'm not then attraction must be something about character, energy, or spirit. Surely?  | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
 | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"It's a combination. The primary drive is genetic but then you have a reproductive strategy of how you want to meet that primary drive. So then you are looking at your environment trying to judge women that fit, and are responsive to your strategy. You'll pick up on this subconsciously before you do consciously and hence feel very exited by certain women who are responding to your call to come hither. This is incorrect, there could be identical twins and you could only be attracted to one of them. Is that so? That would be weird if that's the case It would entirely kill the whole evolutionary physical argument. Anyone got a link to anything on this? Or any experience of it?
No it wouldn't because again, I didn't say attraction was 100% genetic. Which is a strawman that all your criticism rests upon.
I'm not criticising. Merely asking an open minded question. Surely the whole point with evolution is that it happens all the time? Either we're attracted to people for evolutionary reasons or we're not. I can't see how some half way fudge where it only happens sometimes works. If there is no discernable physical difference between two women and yet I only find one of them attractive that must mean genes, child bearing hips, etc have absolutely no part to play in attraction. If they did I'd be at least mildly attracted to the twin. If I'm not then attraction must be something about character, energy, or spirit. Surely? "Do you actually know any identical twins? Firstly they don't look identical in the literal sense. Secondly, they can have very different personalities and thirdly they may respond very differently to your advances. If you want an interesting intellectual masturbation then ask yourself if two identical twins were raised separately, could one become gay and not the other. But they are irrelevant to the system i described. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Been watching this but it's a bit too deep for poor little blonde me "Shh  I'm just pretending I know what I'm talking about | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"*pulls into thread on little scooter, lifts up googles, realises the usual suspects are doing intellectual wheelies, puts googles back on and zips off to the wanking thread*" Yeah were using long words today, like genes | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"You look at someone and your brain goes yes I want to fuck that person. There ya go." What makes me think I'm on the cusp of getting accused of overthinking again? | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"You look at someone and your brain goes yes I want to fuck that person. There ya go. What makes me think I'm on the cusp of getting accused of overthinking again? "It's an interesting question. Your response to jusbinbusted was a bit weird though | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"*pulls into thread on little scooter, lifts up googles, realises the usual suspects are doing intellectual wheelies, puts googles back on and zips off to the wanking thread* Yeah were using long words today, like genes" Patronising much. Somethings exist outside of logic and reason, like attraction, art, music, you can try to analyse them, but when you do they slip away into the ether like the shadows on the wall. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"*pulls into thread on little scooter, lifts up googles, realises the usual suspects are doing intellectual wheelies, puts googles back on and zips off to the wanking thread* Yeah were using long words today, like genes Patronising much. Somethings exist outside of logic and reason, like attraction, art, music, you can try to analyse them, but when you do they slip away into the ether like the shadows on the wall. " I agree that things like the reception of art and music is so complex it can't currently be distilled into formulas. But they can be analysed and we can make objective statements of fact about them and know something, if not everything. For example, it's a fact that creativity in the top 100 selling singles has been declining for a long time now. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"You should be careful about how you talk of science. The mere existence of theories on something (albeit scientific theories) does not render it so. You can't go from "there's a theory we smell it" to "it's all down to smell". The correct formulation is "some scientists currently believe it's all down to smell". That vital open mindedness is both more accurate, more conducive to inquisitive rational and critical debate, and more scientific
You asked a different poster above for 'a reason' and I believe that is what I gave you. I didn't realise that we were in a court of law or scientific symposium. "Oops So sorry guys. I thought that comment had been posted by broken. Me and him are much more used to tussling over terminologies and stuff and are quite "familiar" in a forum sense. Sorry to have bashed you on the head with this. Very rude of me | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"It is said that we find people that look like ourselves attractive as we view ourselves as attractive. I think there is merit in this finding as many couples do have similar facial features. " Statistically, people are more likely to marry someone whose name starts with the same sound as theirs (e.g. Brad and Britney). | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"You look at someone and your brain goes yes I want to fuck that person. There ya go. What makes me think I'm on the cusp of getting accused of overthinking again?
It's an interesting question. Your response to jusbinbusted was a bit weird though "Thanks for bringing my attention to that. In fact I hadn't realised there were a whole bunch of other responses too. So I've just had a read back through it all | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
 | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"I know nobody knows the answer to this but it's fun to give the opinion of your gut. I sense that the whole gene evolution thing is bs. I think it's a spiritual energetic pull and, if so, is perhaps evidence of the mind existing outside the brain as some kind of energetic field that, when in contact with another mind it finds attractive, sends back alarm bells to the body. I think eye contact is further evidence of that projection of the soul out of the body and the energetic interaction of souls. But I couldn't possibly prove any of the above "I love comments like this, I screenshot them and send them to my wife | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"It is said that we find people that look like ourselves attractive as we view ourselves as attractive. I think there is merit in this finding as many couples do have similar facial features. Statistically, people are more likely to marry someone whose name starts with the same sound as theirs (e.g. Brad and Britney). " Interesting, is yours and your other halfs name sounding the same? I wonder how many couples responding or reading this thread have the same sounding names? And are we only talking about first names? | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"It is said that we find people that look like ourselves attractive as we view ourselves as attractive. I think there is merit in this finding as many couples do have similar facial features. Statistically, people are more likely to marry someone whose name starts with the same sound as theirs (e.g. Brad and Britney). Interesting, is yours and your other halfs name sounding the same? I wonder how many couples responding or reading this thread have the same sounding names? And are we only talking about first names? " No and it only applies to first names. It's not a big trend but it's a noticeable statistical difference. From memory I think you are about 10% more likely to marry someone with a similar sounding first name, after you normalize everything else | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"It is said that we find people that look like ourselves attractive as we view ourselves as attractive. I think there is merit in this finding as many couples do have similar facial features. " I often smile at people who look uncannily like their dogs I wonder if this is the same thing? If so, any sexy women out there who also have a cocker spaniel fancy meeting me? And no, before you ask, I don't have floppy ears and a black nose | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"You just recognise something within them that calls to you. Or subconciously the way their bum looks in jeans calls to you. Interesting what BB says about the name thing. My most successful relationships have been with men with the same initial as myself. " See what you've done broken  You've got people thinking science supports attraction being based on the first letter of your name. Jeez and who said science would banish superstition?!? | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"*pulls into thread on little scooter, lifts up googles, realises the usual suspects are doing intellectual wheelies, puts googles back on and zips off to the wanking thread* Yeah were using long words today, like genes Patronising much. Somethings exist outside of logic and reason, like attraction, art, music, you can try to analyse them, but when you do they slip away into the ether like the shadows on the wall. I agree that things like the reception of art and music is so complex it can't currently be distilled into formulas. But they can be analysed and we can make objective statements of fact about them and know something, if not everything. For example, it's a fact that creativity in the top 100 selling singles has been declining for a long time now. " Can you analyse the greatest popular song writer of all time can’t read music and dreamt his two biggest and well known songs in his sleep. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"You just recognise something within them that calls to you. Or subconciously the way their bum looks in jeans calls to you. Interesting what BB says about the name thing. My most successful relationships have been with men with the same initial as myself. See what you've done broken You've got people thinking science supports attraction being based on the first letter of your name. Jeez and who said science would banish superstition?!? "It's a statistical fact. How you want to try and explain it is up to you | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"You just recognise something within them that calls to you. Or subconciously the way their bum looks in jeans calls to you. Interesting what BB says about the name thing. My most successful relationships have been with men with the same initial as myself. See what you've done broken You've got people thinking science supports attraction being based on the first letter of your name. Jeez and who said science would banish superstition?!?
It's a statistical fact. How you want to try and explain it is up to you "So are you telling me that if there was statistical evidence that less men whose fathers like listening to mozart get shot in war zones than men whose fathers like listening to beethoven you'd suggest there's something there that needs explanation?? | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"It's a combination. The primary drive is genetic but then you have a reproductive strategy of how you want to meet that primary drive. So then you are looking at your environment trying to judge women that fit, and are responsive to your strategy. You'll pick up on this subconsciously before you do consciously and hence feel very exited by certain women who are responding to your call to come hither. This is incorrect, there could be identical twins and you could only be attracted to one of them. Is that so? That would be weird if that's the case It would entirely kill the whole evolutionary physical argument. Anyone got a link to anything on this? Or any experience of it?
No it wouldn't because again, I didn't say attraction was 100% genetic. Which is a strawman that all your criticism rests upon.
I think it depends on what you’re looking for at the time
If you’re after a long term , safe and secure relationship where sex isn’t the number one thing , it’ll be a different type to who you are p looking for if you haven’t cum for a few days .
A great example of this was when I got with my wife some eight years ago . I’d been on dating sites and got fed up of the coldness of it all . I stopped going on them and asked S out , who wasn't into the goth look then , Infact she didn’t wear make up at all . Very plain , but just what I needed at the time .
Fast forward six months and she got into the make up , goth look ( which I love ) , stockings etc.... another six months and we started swinging .
So the initial attraction was completely different to the current attraction which came with time . Equally as strong now and we’ve been married for nearly six years now "I love that.
But.... in a different situation with different people, such a change would have ended the relationship. | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"I know nobody knows the answer to this but it's fun to give the opinion of your gut. I sense that the whole gene evolution thing is bs. I think it's a spiritual energetic pull and, if so, is perhaps evidence of the mind existing outside the brain as some kind of energetic field that, when in contact with another mind it finds attractive, sends back alarm bells to the body. I think eye contact is further evidence of that projection of the soul out of the body and the energetic interaction of souls. But I couldn't possibly prove any of the above "I believe it is all the above - no reason why not - body, soul and spirit. I have a physical type, I have no doubt there are pheromones I respond to, personalities, character traits.....but by far the strongest draw for me is a 'vibe' I sense, a sexual chemistry I seem to be able to sniff out at a hundred paces lol, before I have ANY mentally processed information. I just sense it's there. And, once in a blue moon, some kind of deeper soul connection too, not a sexual thing but an emotional closeness that comes out of nowhere. It's another fascinating subject! | |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
| Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| Post new Message to Thread |
| back to top |  |
