FabSwingers.com forum: Messing women around

By *ensual_touch OP Man
over a year ago

canterbury

I just can't understand the guys on here that mess women around, chatting for a while, arranging a meet and then not seeing it through, I am not saying this because they give the rest of us genuine guys a bad name but because I have seen the effect it has, I met last year a wonderful woman one here, whom I still see occasionally, she is sexy, intelligent and is a real lady, in the last year or so she has had this happen to her over 20 times and has now got to the point where she is going to leave, at first she took it on the chin but now she is feeling as if she is worthless, yes she is on here for nsa but when it happens, she is hurt by these no shows and her confidence has been shattered, I'm sure there are plenty of other ladies that go through this as well and I would like to say 2 things, Ladies there is nothing wrong with you, those guys are jerks and to any of those guys that do it, you are lucky there is no name and shame, if you don't really want to meet a person, then don't arrange a meet, how would you feel if someone did this to a close family member or a close friend of yours?

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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest

It happens to men and couples too.

I agree its never nice when it happens, but to be honest if it happened over 20 times Id be seriously looking at how I was arranging things, cos obviously it aint working...

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

have to agree with _ezebel. if i had been let down that often i would seriously change what i was doing

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By *obbytupperMan
over a year ago

Menston near Ilkley

how would you feel if someone did this to a close family member or a close friend of yours?

This confuses if not worries me.

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By *ensual_touch OP Man
over a year ago

canterbury

She has been on here for nearly 2 years, in the first year she had no shortage of meets but now it has turned 180 degrees, she has tried different tactics in the last few months and gets loads of interest but keeps getting let down now

In reply to the comment made by _obbytupper, what I was saying is, that the guys that do this how would they feel if someone treated a close family member or close friend of theirs the way that they themselves treat the women on here

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By *erkshireMan123Man
over a year ago

Devizes

whats your friends profile?

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By *ensual_touch OP Man
over a year ago

canterbury

I'm not giving that out mate as I think she would not appreciate it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't know about guys who mess people around - it's coup[les that we find are the biggest bunch of pissfarters.

We've lost count of the mumber of messages we've had from other couples, 'Oh we love your profile, love your pics, we'd love to meet and bla bla bla bla bla' only for us to respond then never hear from them again.

Now on the other hand if we get a message from a guy and reply to arrange a meet, it is usually sorted in a couple of messages without any of the fucking about.

Job done

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i get quite a few last min cancelations

over all most of the guys i arrange to meet with do show

if it got to the point i was getting more let me down than not id pack up lol

but cancelations and no shows are just a part of swinging that will never go away, if your going to do this you have to accept that and not let it get you down

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"It happens to men and couples too.

I agree its never nice when it happens, but to be honest if it happened over 20 times Id be seriously looking at how I was arranging things, cos obviously it aint working...

bingo...

and I know it sounds harsh... but if it had happened to me over 20 times, I'd look at the way I was approaching it.. and seeing if there is something I was doing... or not doing..

in the end the common demoninator is her... is she taking things too fast? is she getting to know the people well enough? and a million and one other things..... if i am not 110% sure, I keep at it till I am.....

I can count the number of timewasters I have had on one hand in the 5 or 6 years I have been here.. i have worked out a way to make it work for me... she just needs to find a way or a process that works for her.....

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

I must admit my meets per week ratio has dropped off hugely now I've been on for about a year, but with that I get a lot less timewasters and wannnabes. After posting a similar moan on the forums myself a few months ago I got lots of really good advice that really helped me filter out no shows before I wasted a train fare.

Then I started going to clubs, and found I didn't need to arrange meets as often. Maybe your friend could look at that, because if one guy doesn't turn up, there are lots more to play with.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

when i 1st started this again i had a

2 no shows

and 3 cancellations last minute and 3 what was like " running late be there in 10 or 15 mns"

so i changed the way i did things i dont give more than 1 chance out unless its a damm good reason and i block as soon as the issues arise

im better for this and im not let down im not thinking "cancelling or not" and im on control x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In the time I have been a member

Arranged 3 meets with different ladies

failed to show all 3

2 dissapeared never to been seen again .

1 had the courtesy to cancel an hour before the meet , but decided to block me ???

I am male for anyone that din't notice .

As much as I feel for the lady in the OP some of us genuine males can be left to feel just as bad .

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Ive been on here almost 4 years ive never had a no show and the only time ive had a cancellation (which has been twice) have both been from regular guys who i know had a genuine reason.

Ive cancelled meets, well not cancelled but posponed meets on occassions. But to be honest ive never cancelled or had some one cancel that wasnt just posponed until a later date. People may not agree with the way i do things but it works for me.

I am expecting a no show one day, the law of averages says its bound to happen.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is a shame for your friend but from friends I have spoken to it seems it happen to single men far more often than it does to woman. But 20 times is a lot of times regardless of male, female or couples x

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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

This has happened to me on several occasions not just meets but dates too!

So used to being stood up it's a nice surprise when an arrangement goes ahead!

Guys have taken ill, had accidents, family problems, cold feet, working, no reason.

My gripe is that in order for me to go out I need to arrange for my kids to go to my Mum's to then end up spending a night in on my own. It's not good.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had this and re thought my approach, now only meet for a quick coffee when I dont need a babysitter at a venue local to me which has a very nice gift shop next door so at the worse I have a nice coffee and a browse in the gift shop, havent had a no show since I changed my way of arranging meets.

Oh and I now never meet men I have had to suggest the meet to, found out that if I suggested the meet they were the most frequent no shows.

Please feel free to get your friend to message me if she feels the need to chat about her experiences.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've never had a no-show, though had a cancelation before. Now if they want to meet me I make sure they send a message to Sir first!!

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By *atisfy janeWoman
over a year ago

Torquay

I've had many meets through the site in my two years...and never had a no show either.

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By *arnaclebillMan
over a year ago

Robin Hood County

"I just can't understand the guys on here that mess women around, chatting for a while, arranging a meet and then not seeing it through, I am not saying this because they give the rest of us genuine guys a bad name but because I have seen the effect it has, I met last year a wonderful woman one here, whom I still see occasionally, she is sexy, intelligent and is a real lady, in the last year or so she has had this happen to her over 20 times and has now got to the point where she is going to leave, at first she took it on the chin but now she is feeling as if she is worthless, yes she is on here for nsa but when it happens, she is hurt by these no shows and her confidence has been shattered, I'm sure there are plenty of other ladies that go through this as well and I would like to say 2 things, Ladies there is nothing wrong with you, those guys are jerks and to any of those guys that do it, you are lucky there is no name and shame, if you don't really want to meet a person, then don't arrange a meet, how would you feel if someone did this to a close family member or a close friend of yours? "

Well you just have to shrug it off and put it down to experience I do and believe me it has happened to me just as often. Forget it move on/

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It has happened to us as recently as last Saturday! Had arranged a meet with a great guy I've shagged before but wanted an extra guy to come along to add sum more fun! He'd been cruising me for ages, I asked him to meet, he accepted, texts followed and then he insisted on phoning which was fine! We had a naughty chat, he texted the day before the meet and then no more! At the meet I tried texting and calling and what a surprise....his phone was off! Still had a great night but what is the point of these timewasters? I sent him a message telling him to be a man and if he couldn't make it, just to let me know! Pathetic really!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i had this happen to me last night. His loss.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i get this with couples really,not many.But what I dont like is endless male2male chtter about me joining them..I ask for some form of phone call to know im not just turning up to satisfy HIS fantasy- so its now a given thing for me, no female half contact before a meet NO meet...or meat whatever u like lol

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