FabSwingers.com forum: How many of you would still swing if

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

You had to put more effort in?

I'm not talking about into your profile or messages, but generally.

Being of a certain age, when I started the only way to indulge was word of mouth, ie parties or more likely contact magazines that you would get from an adult shop, of which there were few, adverts in the back of newspapers etc.

You would then reply to an advert, put it into a sealed envelope, inside another envelope addressed to a po box or the magazine publishers. Then, if you were lucky you may wait weeks for a reply. It could take months to meet someone. No photographs, occasionally a grainy Polaroid. You really had to want to be a part of it, put a lot of effort in to meet.

With the internet and mobile phone, it has become so much easier, just a few clicks and you could potentially be meeting someone. I just wondered how many would actually bother if it was more difficult.

Many people complain of time wasters on all sides. It never happened, again because of the effort put in to actually meet. Some of you will mention clubs, but then, they weren't so well known or as many.

I'm not suggesting for one minute we should go backwards, just that there isn't as much effort needed to meet someone. How many are here because it's easy. Difficult to know because many of you won't have known any different.

I'm not that old! Really!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If it was too easy I would give up.

I love challenges

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Effort is for real life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn't call myself a swinger inthe traditional sense and this is something I could live without so no I wouldn't put the effort in.

Can I ask though were things better back then? It seems to me swinging was a more sociable thing then? Friendships and connections were longer lasting maybe?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Effort in equals effort out, surely?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At the moment I can't be bothered to swing because I have to put effort in to get dressed up in stockings and stuff, do my hair and makeup, to go and meet men who don't put any effort in to their attire xxx

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By *lkDomWhtSubBiCpleCouple
over a year ago

Somewhere / Everywhere /Kinksville

To me it’s a question of time. And time to me is one of the most precious things. Over the years when I have spent much time trying to arrange meets that have failed, I’ve come to realise that time was ill spent. So actually I do put a lot less effort in now, given the same lines of technology as you describe. Because i have other things I want to do and need to do, than spend hours and days trying to arrange something that others don’t appreciate quite so much.

Playtime for us has its place and it’s fun, but our lives are not created around it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"At the moment I can't be bothered to swing because I have to put effort in to get dressed up in stockings and stuff, do my hair and makeup, to go and meet men who don't put any effort in to their attire xxx"

THIS!.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I already put a great amount of in, so yes I still would.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I wouldn't call myself a swinger inthe traditional sense and this is something I could live without so no I wouldn't put the effort in.

Can I ask though were things better back then? It seems to me swinging was a more sociable thing then? Friendships and connections were longer lasting maybe? "

Were they better? That's a good question.in some ways I would say yes. You would meet people based on what was written as opposed to a photograph. My very first meet was with a couple, who after my second meet with them, realised they weren't for me, my second was with a single female a few miles from me, we had a social then had a play straight after. My third, another couple, after an initial social in a pub I played with for eight years, before an illness to one of them. I would perhaps say there wasn't so much emphasis on what someone looked like as there is now. Whether that is better or not I couldn't really say, although when you met someone socially it truly was on their personalities. Perhaps that's why friendships were formed.

There are more opportunities to meet now, more people. A contact magazine may have had a hundred or so contacts, but that could be national with only a few from your area. Others would be more regionalised, but include the south, south east and south west for example. Now of course you can look nationally or just a few miles. Definitely easier, in my opinion.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah I would not like to go back to the time when you had to get up and change the Channel on the TV, but if we had to I guess we would still watch TV

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By *ifty grades of shadyCouple
over a year ago

Carisbrooke, Isle of Wight

We've never minded putting the effort into doing this, it's part of the fun to be honest. Indeed where we live and the lack of fab opportunities for those that fit into our demographic means that we have to fork out a small fortune (for us) the leave the area and basically we are at least an hour from the closest of meets.

To not make the effort seems to us to be fab suicide, why would we take that chance?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it's down to what you on here for. If it's random sex with anyone, at anytime, then you can find that here.

However if you want long lasting "sexual relations" with like minded people then you can also find that here too, but this takes effort. I think those who want the latter do put that effort in.

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By *ifty grades of shadyCouple
over a year ago

Carisbrooke, Isle of Wight

"I think it's down to what you on here for. If it's random sex with anyone, at anytime, then you can find that here.

However if you want long lasting "sexual relations" with like minded people then you can also find that here too, but this takes effort. I think those who want the latter do put that effort in.

"
we'd agree with you on that. We take the long term view of the relationship, rather than a quick shag, although the club scene does offer that opportunity too.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think it's down to what you on here for. If it's random sex with anyone, at anytime, then you can find that here.

However if you want long lasting "sexual relations" with like minded people then you can also find that here too, but this takes effort. I think those who want the latter do put that effort in.

I think you've missed the point of the thread. I'm not talking about the effort that is put in today. That goes without saying, effort in, effort out. But even that effort is so much easier today than it was when I first started. Reread the op.

I realise for many it would be an impossible question to answer as fab and it's ilk is all many would know.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think it's down to what you on here for. If it's random sex with anyone, at anytime, then you can find that here.

However if you want long lasting "sexual relations" with like minded people then you can also find that here too, but this takes effort. I think those who want the latter do put that effort in.

I realise for many it would be an impossible question to answer as fab and it's ilk is all many would know."

No I understood the question but just see it slightly different. Yes the ways in which you would approach a woman when you was younger is different now. What with social media and a more "liberated" woman the times have changed.

So yes I agree with the original statement I'm simply saying, you get out what you put in and I'm sure it's the same in the yesteryear you speak of.

Just not as easy to ask for someone address so you can send them a letter. Lol

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