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"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock! I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?" Have you actually sat and seriously asked her about it? Or is it just assumptions? Also does she know you’re involved with the site? As that’s pretty deceitful if not man | |||
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"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock! I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it? Have you actually sat and seriously asked her about it? Or is it just assumptions? Also does she know you’re involved with the site? As that’s pretty deceitful if not man" It's come up in conversation and she said she hates the idea of two guys together. And no, she doesn't know I'm here...think of that what you want lol | |||
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"I feel for you mate! But it’s gonna end in tears " Yep I would agree...your profile says your looking to meet women too so maybe hold off on the marriage plans for a while. | |||
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"Well she has absolutely no suspicions lol" Oh well that's fine then ![]() | |||
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"That's my friend, she knows" So she doesn’t mind you fucking other women, but guys is a no no? | |||
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"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock! I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?" I’d be more concerned about you doing this behind your girlfriends back and putting her at risk. | |||
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"Don't get caught. Get regularly tests for STIs." How lovely for his poor unsuspecting girlfriend. | |||
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"Well she has absolutely no suspicions lol" Oh the old adage of. “It’s not cheating if you don’t caught”. FFS! ![]() | |||
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"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock! I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?" It must be so hard , and I feel for you mate . Best bet is to finish with the girlfriend and try and find an open minded lady to swing with . Good luck | |||
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"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock! I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it? It must be so hard , and I feel for you mate . Best bet is to finish with the girlfriend and try and find an open minded lady to swing with . Good luck " I agree. You have one life, don't waste it being unhappy and don't waste hers. | |||
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"That's my friend, she knows" So your not only cheating because you crave men if your sleeping with woman as well. Come clean and tell her, she deserves better | |||
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"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock! I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?" I am in the same situation mate | |||
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"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock! I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it? I am in the same situation mate " So what do you do about it? | |||
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"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock! I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it? Have you actually sat and seriously asked her about it? Or is it just assumptions? Also does she know you’re involved with the site? As that’s pretty deceitful if not man It's come up in conversation and she said she hates the idea of two guys together. And no, she doesn't know I'm here...think of that what you want lol" Be bloody careful about discretion or you'll lose her and she might tell the world what you've done. | |||
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"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock! I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it? I am in the same situation mate So what do you do about it?" I just came out to her and told her the truth. That i love her to bits but have a bi side too and that i enjoy. So i just play amd get tested regular. | |||
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"I feel for you mate! But it’s gonna end in tears " This. ![]() | |||
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"Damn I'd love a boyfriend like that." Me!! I love pussy and cock ?? | |||
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"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock! I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it? I am in the same situation mate So what do you do about it?" Look it’s your life... if you can live with yourself. Who are we to judge? | |||
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"U know what u need to do and you know what u want to do. The choice is yours and yours alone but dont lie to keep a woman who really doesn't satisfy you. " This ![]() ![]() | |||
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"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock! I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?" Find someone who will indulge your bi fantasies let her find the man she wants and deserves. Both of you will have a better chance of having fulfilling marriages with all that entails. Don't be selfish trap her in an unhappy and dishonest marriage you owe her that. | |||
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"That's my friend, she knows" Aside from the subject at hand, if you check photo rules you should not have ANY pics where another person is identifiable on your profile. Her face should be blurred. | |||
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"You could kick the cock “habit” if you chose to. However, as you’re already on here behind her back looking for meets with women then i’d say you don’t respect her or love her enough to even try. She deserves a bloke who is honest and loyal. You need to find someone who matches you sexually and who you care enough about to be 100% honest with because seriously, you’re just being selfish. Why some men make their life so complicated is beyond me. " I don't think people choos to be bi, so they can't help that complication. I agree that he should find someone who he can be his true self with, but agein, that's not easy as everyone on here knows. It is possible to love someone deeply but yet still need/want to have the 'bi side' also physically satisfied. Sex is natural, as is being bi. He's in a difficult situation, one I don't envy him of. His partner has already shown that she doesn't agree with bi men, so he is unable to be open with her, so the 'morally correct' option is he would leave, but he loves her so leaving her will probably break his heart, and hers, and they may never recover from the heartache.It's an awful situation to be in, and I'd like to see how those of you who judge him harshly would deal with it if you were in a similar situation. | |||
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"You could kick the cock “habit” if you chose to. However, as you’re already on here behind her back looking for meets with women then i’d say you don’t respect her or love her enough to even try. She deserves a bloke who is honest and loyal. You need to find someone who matches you sexually and who you care enough about to be 100% honest with because seriously, you’re just being selfish. Why some men make their life so complicated is beyond me. I don't think people choos to be bi, so they can't help that complication. I agree that he should find someone who he can be his true self with, but agein, that's not easy as everyone on here knows. It is possible to love someone deeply but yet still need/want to have the 'bi side' also physically satisfied. Sex is natural, as is being bi. He's in a difficult situation, one I don't envy him of. His partner has already shown that she doesn't agree with bi men, so he is unable to be open with her, so the 'morally correct' option is he would leave, but he loves her so leaving her will probably break his heart, and hers, and they may never recover from the heartache.It's an awful situation to be in, and I'd like to see how those of you who judge him harshly would deal with it if you were in a similar situation." ![]() | |||
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"You could kick the cock “habit” if you chose to. However, as you’re already on here behind her back looking for meets with women then i’d say you don’t respect her or love her enough to even try. She deserves a bloke who is honest and loyal. You need to find someone who matches you sexually and who you care enough about to be 100% honest with because seriously, you’re just being selfish. Why some men make their life so complicated is beyond me. I don't think people choos to be bi, so they can't help that complication. I agree that he should find someone who he can be his true self with, but agein, that's not easy as everyone on here knows. It is possible to love someone deeply but yet still need/want to have the 'bi side' also physically satisfied. Sex is natural, as is being bi. He's in a difficult situation, one I don't envy him of. His partner has already shown that she doesn't agree with bi men, so he is unable to be open with her, so the 'morally correct' option is he would leave, but he loves her so leaving her will probably break his heart, and hers, and they may never recover from the heartache.It's an awful situation to be in, and I'd like to see how those of you who judge him harshly would deal with it if you were in a similar situation. ![]() You know what? Maybe, just maybe he fell in love with her and thought he could make it work with her. Perhaps he thought he wouldn't need to see men. Must be great living in your blank and white world ![]() | |||
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"You could kick the cock “habit” if you chose to. However, as you’re already on here behind her back looking for meets with women then i’d say you don’t respect her or love her enough to even try. She deserves a bloke who is honest and loyal. You need to find someone who matches you sexually and who you care enough about to be 100% honest with because seriously, you’re just being selfish. Why some men make their life so complicated is beyond me. I don't think people choos to be bi, so they can't help that complication. I agree that he should find someone who he can be his true self with, but agein, that's not easy as everyone on here knows. It is possible to love someone deeply but yet still need/want to have the 'bi side' also physically satisfied. Sex is natural, as is being bi. He's in a difficult situation, one I don't envy him of. His partner has already shown that she doesn't agree with bi men, so he is unable to be open with her, so the 'morally correct' option is he would leave, but he loves her so leaving her will probably break his heart, and hers, and they may never recover from the heartache.It's an awful situation to be in, and I'd like to see how those of you who judge him harshly would deal with it if you were in a similar situation. ![]() ![]() Yes it is now thanks ![]() | |||
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"You could kick the cock “habit” if you chose to. However, as you’re already on here behind her back looking for meets with women then i’d say you don’t respect her or love her enough to even try. She deserves a bloke who is honest and loyal. You need to find someone who matches you sexually and who you care enough about to be 100% honest with because seriously, you’re just being selfish. Why some men make their life so complicated is beyond me. I don't think people choos to be bi, so they can't help that complication. I agree that he should find someone who he can be his true self with, but agein, that's not easy as everyone on here knows. It is possible to love someone deeply but yet still need/want to have the 'bi side' also physically satisfied. Sex is natural, as is being bi. He's in a difficult situation, one I don't envy him of. His partner has already shown that she doesn't agree with bi men, so he is unable to be open with her, so the 'morally correct' option is he would leave, but he loves her so leaving her will probably break his heart, and hers, and they may never recover from the heartache.It's an awful situation to be in, and I'd like to see how those of you who judge him harshly would deal with it if you were in a similar situation. ![]() A lot of people outside of the swinging community would consider your use of the term ‘morally correct’ to be so far away from the accepted use to be almost incomprehensible. | |||
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"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock! I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?" I believe you love her, the people talking otherwise are full of shit. However, love doesn't mean you are long-term compatible and you too clearly aren't. You need to man up and dump her. She'll never be ask kinky as you want and you'll never be faithful as she wants. The longer you leave it then the worse the break up will be. | |||
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"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock! I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it? I believe you love her, the people talking otherwise are full of shit. However, love doesn't mean you are long-term compatible and you too clearly aren't. You need to man up and dump her. She'll never be ask kinky as you want and you'll never be faithful as she wants. The longer you leave it then the worse the break up will be." If loving her doesn't mean he has to be honest with her and doesn't mean they are long term compatible, what on earth does it mean? Serious question by the way. The word "love" is bandied around so much yet it seems to mean completely different things to different people. | |||
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"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock! I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it? I believe you love her, the people talking otherwise are full of shit. However, love doesn't mean you are long-term compatible and you too clearly aren't. You need to man up and dump her. She'll never be ask kinky as you want and you'll never be faithful as she wants. The longer you leave it then the worse the break up will be. If loving her doesn't mean he has to be honest with her and doesn't mean they are long term compatible, what on earth does it mean? Serious question by the way. The word "love" is bandied around so much yet it seems to mean completely different things to different people. " Some people sometimes confuse love with financial support... | |||
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"There's a guy i know, he's stuck in a vanilla relationship. He knows im on here and really wants to suck cock and be fucked by a guy whilst performing oral on me etc... he cant tell his gf as he doesn't want her to laugh at him. I get him completely. He will live out his fantasy one day im sure of it if iv got anything to do with it. It's much harder for men... There seems to be more stigma around guys on guys than women together. Personally its a huge turn on for me. ![]() | |||
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" Some people sometimes confuse love with financial support..." Never a truer word spoken ![]() | |||
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"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock! I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it? I believe you love her, the people talking otherwise are full of shit. However, love doesn't mean you are long-term compatible and you too clearly aren't. You need to man up and dump her. She'll never be ask kinky as you want and you'll never be faithful as she wants. The longer you leave it then the worse the break up will be. If loving her doesn't mean he has to be honest with her and doesn't mean they are long term compatible, what on earth does it mean? Serious question by the way. The word "love" is bandied around so much yet it seems to mean completely different things to different people. " In truth it means absolutely fuck all. Any sensible language would have multiple words for all the things we lump onto "love", but we're stuck with a catch all word that means everything and therefore nothing. Put it this way, love is a terrible basis for marriage in my opinion. | |||
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"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock! I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it? I believe you love her, the people talking otherwise are full of shit. However, love doesn't mean you are long-term compatible and you too clearly aren't. You need to man up and dump her. She'll never be ask kinky as you want and you'll never be faithful as she wants. The longer you leave it then the worse the break up will be. If loving her doesn't mean he has to be honest with her and doesn't mean they are long term compatible, what on earth does it mean? Serious question by the way. The word "love" is bandied around so much yet it seems to mean completely different things to different people. In truth it means absolutely fuck all. Any sensible language would have multiple words for all the things we lump onto "love", but we're stuck with a catch all word that means everything and therefore nothing. Put it this way, love is a terrible basis for marriage in my opinion. " If it means fuck all than its difficult to see how you can say you believe he loves her, given that you must think "I love x" is a meaningless statement. I tend to agree with you for what it's worth. What I think he means by "love" is that he gets on OK. With this woman, quite likes her and likes the emotional support the relationship gives him. None of this however means he is willing to put what matters to her above what matters to him. | |||
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"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock! I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it? I believe you love her, the people talking otherwise are full of shit. However, love doesn't mean you are long-term compatible and you too clearly aren't. You need to man up and dump her. She'll never be ask kinky as you want and you'll never be faithful as she wants. The longer you leave it then the worse the break up will be. If loving her doesn't mean he has to be honest with her and doesn't mean they are long term compatible, what on earth does it mean? Serious question by the way. The word "love" is bandied around so much yet it seems to mean completely different things to different people. In truth it means absolutely fuck all. Any sensible language would have multiple words for all the things we lump onto "love", but we're stuck with a catch all word that means everything and therefore nothing. Put it this way, love is a terrible basis for marriage in my opinion. If it means fuck all than its difficult to see how you can say you believe he loves her, given that you must think "I love x" is a meaningless statement. I tend to agree with you for what it's worth. What I think he means by "love" is that he gets on OK. With this woman, quite likes her and likes the emotional support the relationship gives him. None of this however means he is willing to put what matters to her above what matters to him. " To clarify, he 'loves' her as much as the average toss pot who uses the same word and doesn't cheat on his partner. Inertia is the glue of most relationships. The ones proclaiming their love from the rooftops always break up when the passion inevitably fades. | |||
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"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock! I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it? I believe you love her, the people talking otherwise are full of shit. However, love doesn't mean you are long-term compatible and you too clearly aren't. You need to man up and dump her. She'll never be ask kinky as you want and you'll never be faithful as she wants. The longer you leave it then the worse the break up will be. If loving her doesn't mean he has to be honest with her and doesn't mean they are long term compatible, what on earth does it mean? Serious question by the way. The word "love" is bandied around so much yet it seems to mean completely different things to different people. In truth it means absolutely fuck all. Any sensible language would have multiple words for all the things we lump onto "love", but we're stuck with a catch all word that means everything and therefore nothing. Put it this way, love is a terrible basis for marriage in my opinion. If it means fuck all than its difficult to see how you can say you believe he loves her, given that you must think "I love x" is a meaningless statement. I tend to agree with you for what it's worth. What I think he means by "love" is that he gets on OK. With this woman, quite likes her and likes the emotional support the relationship gives him. None of this however means he is willing to put what matters to her above what matters to him. To clarify, he 'loves' her as much as the average toss pot who uses the same word and doesn't cheat on his partner. Inertia is the glue of most relationships. The ones proclaiming their love from the rooftops always break up when the passion inevitably fades. " I can't agree with that. If we use "love" as a synonym for liking and caring for someone, it's clear that someone who doesn't do something he would like to do because he knows doing it would seriously upset his partner loves his partner more than someone who goes ahead and does it anyway. | |||
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"...and ignore the moral criticism. My view is to let people do what they feel is right within the bounds of a relationship that only they really understand. Moral outrage is always a bit rich. I reckon at least 95% of the guys on here would shag a woman with a boyfriend if they thought they could get away with it.....giving you a hard time, as a guy, is just hitting an easy target." The fact that all of us are morally flawed doesn't mean that statements we make about morality are incorrect. | |||
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"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock! I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it? I believe you love her, the people talking otherwise are full of shit. However, love doesn't mean you are long-term compatible and you too clearly aren't. You need to man up and dump her. She'll never be ask kinky as you want and you'll never be faithful as she wants. The longer you leave it then the worse the break up will be. If loving her doesn't mean he has to be honest with her and doesn't mean they are long term compatible, what on earth does it mean? Serious question by the way. The word "love" is bandied around so much yet it seems to mean completely different things to different people. In truth it means absolutely fuck all. Any sensible language would have multiple words for all the things we lump onto "love", but we're stuck with a catch all word that means everything and therefore nothing. Put it this way, love is a terrible basis for marriage in my opinion. If it means fuck all than its difficult to see how you can say you believe he loves her, given that you must think "I love x" is a meaningless statement. I tend to agree with you for what it's worth. What I think he means by "love" is that he gets on OK. With this woman, quite likes her and likes the emotional support the relationship gives him. None of this however means he is willing to put what matters to her above what matters to him. To clarify, he 'loves' her as much as the average toss pot who uses the same word and doesn't cheat on his partner. Inertia is the glue of most relationships. The ones proclaiming their love from the rooftops always break up when the passion inevitably fades. I can't agree with that. If we use "love" as a synonym for liking and caring for someone, it's clear that someone who doesn't do something he would like to do because he knows doing it would seriously upset his partner loves his partner more than someone who goes ahead and does it anyway. " As i say, you can't have a serious discussion about love in english. Imho. | |||
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"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock! I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it? I believe you love her, the people talking otherwise are full of shit. However, love doesn't mean you are long-term compatible and you too clearly aren't. You need to man up and dump her. She'll never be ask kinky as you want and you'll never be faithful as she wants. The longer you leave it then the worse the break up will be. If loving her doesn't mean he has to be honest with her and doesn't mean they are long term compatible, what on earth does it mean? Serious question by the way. The word "love" is bandied around so much yet it seems to mean completely different things to different people. In truth it means absolutely fuck all. Any sensible language would have multiple words for all the things we lump onto "love", but we're stuck with a catch all word that means everything and therefore nothing. Put it this way, love is a terrible basis for marriage in my opinion. If it means fuck all than its difficult to see how you can say you believe he loves her, given that you must think "I love x" is a meaningless statement. I tend to agree with you for what it's worth. What I think he means by "love" is that he gets on OK. With this woman, quite likes her and likes the emotional support the relationship gives him. None of this however means he is willing to put what matters to her above what matters to him. To clarify, he 'loves' her as much as the average toss pot who uses the same word and doesn't cheat on his partner. Inertia is the glue of most relationships. The ones proclaiming their love from the rooftops always break up when the passion inevitably fades. I can't agree with that. If we use "love" as a synonym for liking and caring for someone, it's clear that someone who doesn't do something he would like to do because he knows doing it would seriously upset his partner loves his partner more than someone who goes ahead and does it anyway. As i say, you can't have a serious discussion about love in english. Imho." Well. I certainly think we can say he cares less about her than someone who also had the urge to secretly suck random penises, but doesn't act on the urge. | |||
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" Well. I certainly think we can say he cares less about her than someone who also had the urge to secretly suck random penises, but doesn't act on the urge. " Disagree. The repression of urges is effectively the allocation of energy for that purpose. Therefore, it is being taken away from another potential use. You're inferring a value judgement on the use of energy that i don't agree with. | |||
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" Well. I certainly think we can say he cares less about her than someone who also had the urge to secretly suck random penises, but doesn't act on the urge. Disagree. The repression of urges is effectively the allocation of energy for that purpose. Therefore, it is being taken away from another potential use. You're inferring a value judgement on the use of energy that i don't agree with. " You've lost me. I am just going on the common sense view that if you want to do something that you know will hurt and upset your partner you have the choice whether or not to do it. If you do do it, by definition you care more about satisfying your own desires that you care about your partners feelings. That's not a moral judgment per se . It's only a moral judgment if you hold the view that doing things that hurt your partner are always wrong. Some systems of morality may argue its always right to satisfy one's own desires and that one should not live for others. | |||
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" Well. I certainly think we can say he cares less about her than someone who also had the urge to secretly suck random penises, but doesn't act on the urge. Disagree. The repression of urges is effectively the allocation of energy for that purpose. Therefore, it is being taken away from another potential use. You're inferring a value judgement on the use of energy that i don't agree with. You've lost me. I am just going on the common sense view that if you want to do something that you know will hurt and upset your partner you have the choice whether or not to do it. If you do do it, by definition you care more about satisfying your own desires that you care about your partners feelings. That's not a moral judgment per se . It's only a moral judgment if you hold the view that doing things that hurt your partner are always wrong. Some systems of morality may argue its always right to satisfy one's own desires and that one should not live for others. " Mark wants to suck cocks but his girlfriend susie doesn't want him to. So mark is depressed and sits at home all day playing video games to take his mind off how much he wants cock. Susie thinks he's a loser and needs to get a job. Michael works his ass off to give his family a great life. He's a role model to his kids in every way except one. He's a secret cock sucker. Once a month he goes and sucks a juicy fat one after work and then goes home and plays happy families. Are we saying that mark loves susie or is a better partner to susie than michael is to his partner? | |||
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" Well. I certainly think we can say he cares less about her than someone who also had the urge to secretly suck random penises, but doesn't act on the urge. Disagree. The repression of urges is effectively the allocation of energy for that purpose. Therefore, it is being taken away from another potential use. You're inferring a value judgement on the use of energy that i don't agree with. You've lost me. I am just going on the common sense view that if you want to do something that you know will hurt and upset your partner you have the choice whether or not to do it. If you do do it, by definition you care more about satisfying your own desires that you care about your partners feelings. That's not a moral judgment per se . It's only a moral judgment if you hold the view that doing things that hurt your partner are always wrong. Some systems of morality may argue its always right to satisfy one's own desires and that one should not live for others. Mark wants to suck cocks but his girlfriend susie doesn't want him to. So mark is depressed and sits at home all day playing video games to take his mind off how much he wants cock. Susie thinks he's a loser and needs to get a job. Michael works his ass off to give his family a great life. He's a role model to his kids in every way except one. He's a secret cock sucker. Once a month he goes and sucks a juicy fat one after work and then goes home and plays happy families. Are we saying that mark loves susie or is a better partner to susie than michael is to his partner? " I'd say that's the partner's call, not ours, and without knowledge, how can informed choices be made? | |||
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" Well. I certainly think we can say he cares less about her than someone who also had the urge to secretly suck random penises, but doesn't act on the urge. Disagree. The repression of urges is effectively the allocation of energy for that purpose. Therefore, it is being taken away from another potential use. You're inferring a value judgement on the use of energy that i don't agree with. You've lost me. I am just going on the common sense view that if you want to do something that you know will hurt and upset your partner you have the choice whether or not to do it. If you do do it, by definition you care more about satisfying your own desires that you care about your partners feelings. That's not a moral judgment per se . It's only a moral judgment if you hold the view that doing things that hurt your partner are always wrong. Some systems of morality may argue its always right to satisfy one's own desires and that one should not live for others. Mark wants to suck cocks but his girlfriend susie doesn't want him to. So mark is depressed and sits at home all day playing video games to take his mind off how much he wants cock. Susie thinks he's a loser and needs to get a job. Michael works his ass off to give his family a great life. He's a role model to his kids in every way except one. He's a secret cock sucker. Once a month he goes and sucks a juicy fat one after work and then goes home and plays happy families. Are we saying that mark loves susie or is a better partner to susie than michael is to his partner? " Obviously that's loaded with assumptions. That if one doesn't suck cock when one has the urge to do so, one becomes a complete no hoper. On any event, if caring about someone means anything, it means being attentive to what they want, not what you think they should want. I rather suspect most women would prefer to have a partner who plays an excessive amount of video games than one who has sex with men behind their backs. | |||
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" Well. I certainly think we can say he cares less about her than someone who also had the urge to secretly suck random penises, but doesn't act on the urge. Disagree. The repression of urges is effectively the allocation of energy for that purpose. Therefore, it is being taken away from another potential use. You're inferring a value judgement on the use of energy that i don't agree with. You've lost me. I am just going on the common sense view that if you want to do something that you know will hurt and upset your partner you have the choice whether or not to do it. If you do do it, by definition you care more about satisfying your own desires that you care about your partners feelings. That's not a moral judgment per se . It's only a moral judgment if you hold the view that doing things that hurt your partner are always wrong. Some systems of morality may argue its always right to satisfy one's own desires and that one should not live for others. Mark wants to suck cocks but his girlfriend susie doesn't want him to. So mark is depressed and sits at home all day playing video games to take his mind off how much he wants cock. Susie thinks he's a loser and needs to get a job. Michael works his ass off to give his family a great life. He's a role model to his kids in every way except one. He's a secret cock sucker. Once a month he goes and sucks a juicy fat one after work and then goes home and plays happy families. Are we saying that mark loves susie or is a better partner to susie than michael is to his partner? I'd say that's the partner's call, not ours, and without knowledge, how can informed choices be made?" I agree. It's subjective. All we know about the OP is he's a cock sucker. We don't know all the other factors. | |||
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" Well. I certainly think we can say he cares less about her than someone who also had the urge to secretly suck random penises, but doesn't act on the urge. Disagree. The repression of urges is effectively the allocation of energy for that purpose. Therefore, it is being taken away from another potential use. You're inferring a value judgement on the use of energy that i don't agree with. You've lost me. I am just going on the common sense view that if you want to do something that you know will hurt and upset your partner you have the choice whether or not to do it. If you do do it, by definition you care more about satisfying your own desires that you care about your partners feelings. That's not a moral judgment per se . It's only a moral judgment if you hold the view that doing things that hurt your partner are always wrong. Some systems of morality may argue its always right to satisfy one's own desires and that one should not live for others. Mark wants to suck cocks but his girlfriend susie doesn't want him to. So mark is depressed and sits at home all day playing video games to take his mind off how much he wants cock. Susie thinks he's a loser and needs to get a job. Michael works his ass off to give his family a great life. He's a role model to his kids in every way except one. He's a secret cock sucker. Once a month he goes and sucks a juicy fat one after work and then goes home and plays happy families. Are we saying that mark loves susie or is a better partner to susie than michael is to his partner? Obviously that's loaded with assumptions. That if one doesn't suck cock when one has the urge to do so, one becomes a complete no hoper. On any event, if caring about someone means anything, it means being attentive to what they want, not what you think they should want. I rather suspect most women would prefer to have a partner who plays an excessive amount of video games than one who has sex with men behind their backs. " I don't but i can't prove the case either way. I just know a lot of women who perfect the blind eye technique. | |||
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