FabSwingers.com mobile

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to Swingers Chat

Got a girlfriend but can't kick the cock habit

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock!

I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock!

I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?"

Have you actually sat and seriously asked her about it? Or is it just assumptions?

Also does she know you’re involved with the site? As that’s pretty deceitful if not man

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock!

I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?

Have you actually sat and seriously asked her about it? Or is it just assumptions?

Also does she know you’re involved with the site? As that’s pretty deceitful if not man"

It's come up in conversation and she said she hates the idea of two guys together. And no, she doesn't know I'm here...think of that what you want lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you honestly plan to spend the rest of your life together, then I really think you have to discuss this unless you plan on deceiving her forever. Surely she deserves honesty from a potential life partner and, if you're worrying about it now then ultimately it's just going to make you both unhappy. I would say "or give up cock" but I can't really see that.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't get caught.

Get regularly tests for STIs.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I never liked the thought of 2 guys together until I joined here and it opened my eyes to a whole lot more than I expected!! If I had a partner who wanted to suck cock we would do it together now

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel for you mate! But it’s gonna end in tears

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lik and PaulCouple
over a year ago

cahoots


"I feel for you mate! But it’s gonna end in tears "

Yep I would agree...your profile says your looking to meet women too so maybe hold off on the marriage plans for a while.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Well she has absolutely no suspicions lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

I think if she's the one you're going to marry and your relationship is still relatively new you should either

a) come clean and tell her

b) behave yourself

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Does your gf know her face is public on a swingers site or is that another woman?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well she has absolutely no suspicions lol"

Oh well that's fine then

I'd say if you were really in love with someone and thought they were your life partner, you'd be totally honest with them and not be doing something like this behind their back.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

That's my friend, she knows

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ddibleMan
over a year ago

Exeter Bristol Salisbury

I don't think anyone is going to tell you what you want to hear.

Look at like this. You choose to be with someone over anyone else and they do the same for you- they choose you over anyone else. So you promise to stay faithful no matter what it's the biggest promise you'll ever make in your life. You have too much to lose by breaking it.

If you found out she had been seeing other guys and not telling you how would you feel?

If it means that much to you and she wouldn't allow you to do then maybe she is not the one

Fly straight and true and you'll always end up where you want to be

Some will disagree but it's just one guys opinion

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"That's my friend, she knows"

So she doesn’t mind you fucking other women, but guys is a no no?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

U know what u need to do and you know what u want to do. The choice is yours and yours alone but dont lie to keep a woman who really doesn't satisfy you.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rettytawnee2010TV/TS
over a year ago

North East Lincolnshire

[Removed by poster at 22/05/18 17:41:58]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rettytawnee2010TV/TS
over a year ago

North East Lincolnshire

Windsorlad, are you "ginger" and known as "Harry"locally? Is your girlfriend called "Megan" by any chance ??????????

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock!

I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?"

I’d be more concerned about you doing this behind your girlfriends back and putting her at risk.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lorious hole bs16Man
over a year ago

Bristol

First of all your feelings and desires are unlikely to go away..

Try putting yrself in her shoes(not x dressing!) and reverse the whole thing.

How would you feel??

Most of my visitors are like yourself, tho most identify as straight.I think it's very sad in lots of cases.

Surely it's best not too marry unless you can live with the guilt but don't you think it's unfair?

As has been said ,talk to her and if she can't handle/accept that part of you then perhaps your not meant for each other.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Don't get caught.

Get regularly tests for STIs."

How lovely for his poor unsuspecting girlfriend.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *itvclaireTV/TS
over a year ago

Birmingham


"Well she has absolutely no suspicions lol"

Oh the old adage of. “It’s not cheating if you don’t caught”. FFS!

XX

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester


"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock!

I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?"

It must be so hard , and I feel for you mate .

Best bet is to finish with the girlfriend and try and find an open minded lady to swing with .

Good luck

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock!

I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?

It must be so hard , and I feel for you mate .

Best bet is to finish with the girlfriend and try and find an open minded lady to swing with .

Good luck "

I agree. You have one life, don't waste it being unhappy and don't waste hers.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You lie to your gf and cheat behind her back. Do her a favour, man up to what you really want and split up before she catches something.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds more like youe wanting your cake and eat it and seeking validation clearly not gonna get it bud the shit is gonna hit the fan eventually

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"That's my friend, she knows"

So your not only cheating because you crave men if your sleeping with woman as well. Come clean and tell her, she deserves better

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock!

I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?"

I am in the same situation mate

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock!

I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?

I am in the same situation mate "

So what do you do about it?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock!

I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?

Have you actually sat and seriously asked her about it? Or is it just assumptions?

Also does she know you’re involved with the site? As that’s pretty deceitful if not man

It's come up in conversation and she said she hates the idea of two guys together. And no, she doesn't know I'm here...think of that what you want lol"

Be bloody careful about discretion or you'll lose her and she might tell the world what you've done.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock!

I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?

I am in the same situation mate

So what do you do about it?"

I just came out to her and told her the truth. That i love her to bits but have a bi side too and that i enjoy. So i just play amd get tested regular.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

Damn I'd love a boyfriend like that.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I feel for you mate! But it’s gonna end in tears "

This.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Damn I'd love a boyfriend like that."

Me!! I love pussy and cock ??

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock!

I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?

I am in the same situation mate

So what do you do about it?"

Look it’s your life... if you can live with yourself.

Who are we to judge?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 22/05/18 18:30:32]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Windsorlad

Are you lucky enough to have any sisters? Best friends who are girls? Please can I ask you to reflect on what they would feel ( and your gf) if she discovers her ‘truth’ is actually all a lie.

You have to say goodbye- not only because the way you are lying to her is wrong, but because YOU deserve your happiness.

For you to be truly happy in life you should be totally honest with what you want- and cock appears to be something quite a lot of us love. That’s all cool. Go enjoy as much cock and pussy as you can- but don’t insult your gf ( who you say you love) by making her life a lie.

Think with your head as well as your cock.

Good luck

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"U know what u need to do and you know what u want to do. The choice is yours and yours alone but dont lie to keep a woman who really doesn't satisfy you. "

This !! You do not stray if you are happy! Anything else and you’re just kidding yourself x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No relationship should be built on dishonesty as this has a tendency to make all those involved unhappy ... sorry but you should either tell her and see or leave please respect both yourself and her

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I honestly don’t think you can be 100% happy and look to love and marry someone if you’re not being fully honest with them.

The right partner will love you for all that you are, bi side included.

No-one should just settle for second best, we only have one life, it is too short to be unhappy.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London

As others have said, the OP wants two incompatible things, his girlfriend and casual sex with men. As they are incompatible, he has to make a choice. Either stop the casual stuff or break up with his girlfriend.

I know neither choice is easy, but it has to be made. Carrying on as you are is setting you up for a life time of misery, guilt and self loathing.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hear you OP, cock is very moreish. What’s you’ve popped you just can’t stop.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ask her if she wants to join you on here and you can share the cock with her

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get the feeling that the OP is looking for validation on his actions he very much wants his cake and eat it.

He will continue as he is being with the "love of his life" and also participating in casual sex with men.

Lets fast forward 10yrs, house married kids and the shit hits the fan, but this time your not just ruining her life but the life of your kidos!

And as a friend of mine did through the betrail of being lied to for 3 yrs she spued her gutts on social media letting every one know that the man she utterly adored was also having sex with other men.

But hey the choice is yours, do yourself a favour grow a pair either tell her your little secret or leave the gf she deserves better than the constant lies.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lkDomWhtSubBiCpleCouple
over a year ago

Somewhere / Everywhere /Kinksville

Yes my late husband cheated on me like this, despite us being active members on the scene.

It’s not easy getting used to not being cheated on, so yes his shitty actions have left a wound that’s slowly healing.

Whenever I speak of bi guys casual, easy, quick and unsafe approach to sex, I mean people like you OP. What I found out, was troubling to say the least. No respect for yourself or your partner

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As a guy I'll tell you exactly how I feel about it and please don't take this the wrong way.

If you love her and want to be with her then you need to either stop meeting guys, talk to her about it, or just sack the whole relationship off! You ain't being true to her and you ain't being true to yourself, I totally understand that your bisexual side has got the better of you but you honestly need to get this sorted because it ain't fair on you for having to hide your true colours and it ain't fair on the poor girl because she thinks that you're being 100% honest with her.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *woforone2025Couple (MM)
over a year ago

Dublin


"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock!

I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?"

Find someone who will indulge your bi fantasies let her find the man she wants and deserves. Both of you will have a better chance of having fulfilling marriages with all that entails. Don't be selfish trap her in an unhappy and dishonest marriage you owe her that.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *opping_candyWoman
over a year ago

West Yorkshire


"That's my friend, she knows"

Aside from the subject at hand, if you check photo rules you should not have ANY pics where another person is identifiable on your profile. Her face should be blurred.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 22/05/18 20:04:12]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 22/05/18 20:55:29]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lorious hole bs16Man
over a year ago

Bristol

just wanted to point out that lots of bi and gay guys practice safer sex..Notice how people jump on the "you must get tested bandwagon" despite OP only mentioning sucking cock..AIDS hysteria rolls on.

If sucking cock was so unsafe half of the planet would be affected..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Poor woman. Hopefully she'll find out before marrying you. She should have the right to chose if that type of relationship is for her or not. Obviously you know she wouldn't want it so you continue to lie to keep her.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You need to have an open and honest conversation with her about your sexuality, I wouldn't mention you're already on here though if you don't want to loose her.

Try to come to an agreement or a solution that you will both be happy, though I know from personal experience, that is so much easier said than done.

If she refuses to listen, doesn't want to know, or says you can't see men whilst you're with her, then you need to decide whether you can carry on cheating as you are doing, and risk loosing your girlfriend if she ever found out, or decide if you can give up men.

It an easy situation OP, good luck.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ykmwyldTV/TS
over a year ago

Belpre

Sorry to say, but your in serious trouble. You will never quit sucking cock, thats not going to happen. You really should have a serious talk with the women you love.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You could kick the cock “habit” if you chose to. However, as you’re already on here behind her back looking for meets with women then i’d say you don’t respect her or love her enough to even try.

She deserves a bloke who is honest and loyal.

You need to find someone who matches you sexually and who you care enough about to be 100% honest with because seriously, you’re just being selfish.

Why some men make their life so complicated is beyond me.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You could kick the cock “habit” if you chose to. However, as you’re already on here behind her back looking for meets with women then i’d say you don’t respect her or love her enough to even try.

She deserves a bloke who is honest and loyal.

You need to find someone who matches you sexually and who you care enough about to be 100% honest with because seriously, you’re just being selfish.

Why some men make their life so complicated is beyond me.

"

I don't think people choos to be bi, so they can't help that complication. I agree that he should find someone who he can be his true self with, but agein, that's not easy as everyone on here knows. It is possible to love someone deeply but yet still need/want to have the 'bi side' also physically satisfied. Sex is natural, as is being bi. He's in a difficult situation, one I don't envy him of. His partner has already shown that she doesn't agree with bi men, so he is unable to be open with her, so the 'morally correct' option is he would leave, but he loves her so leaving her will probably break his heart, and hers, and they may never recover from the heartache.It's an awful situation to be in, and I'd like to see how those of you who judge him harshly would deal with it if you were in a similar situation.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lkDomWhtSubBiCpleCouple
over a year ago

Somewhere / Everywhere /Kinksville


"You could kick the cock “habit” if you chose to. However, as you’re already on here behind her back looking for meets with women then i’d say you don’t respect her or love her enough to even try.

She deserves a bloke who is honest and loyal.

You need to find someone who matches you sexually and who you care enough about to be 100% honest with because seriously, you’re just being selfish.

Why some men make their life so complicated is beyond me.

I don't think people choos to be bi, so they can't help that complication. I agree that he should find someone who he can be his true self with, but agein, that's not easy as everyone on here knows. It is possible to love someone deeply but yet still need/want to have the 'bi side' also physically satisfied. Sex is natural, as is being bi. He's in a difficult situation, one I don't envy him of. His partner has already shown that she doesn't agree with bi men, so he is unable to be open with her, so the 'morally correct' option is he would leave, but he loves her so leaving her will probably break his heart, and hers, and they may never recover from the heartache.It's an awful situation to be in, and I'd like to see how those of you who judge him harshly would deal with it if you were in a similar situation."

the morally correct option was not to get into the relationship in the first place, knowing what he was sexually and how he felt.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have you tried those cock patch’s you can get to ween yourself off of cock. You put them over your eyes so you can’t find the cock in question.

Hope this helps X

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *londieddWoman
over a year ago

fife

[Removed by poster at 23/05/18 07:37:09]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *sian male888Man
over a year ago

Birmingham

Hi there I'm the same been in many relationships over the years now settled with my gf but still love tv cock every now and again

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You could kick the cock “habit” if you chose to. However, as you’re already on here behind her back looking for meets with women then i’d say you don’t respect her or love her enough to even try.

She deserves a bloke who is honest and loyal.

You need to find someone who matches you sexually and who you care enough about to be 100% honest with because seriously, you’re just being selfish.

Why some men make their life so complicated is beyond me.

I don't think people choos to be bi, so they can't help that complication. I agree that he should find someone who he can be his true self with, but agein, that's not easy as everyone on here knows. It is possible to love someone deeply but yet still need/want to have the 'bi side' also physically satisfied. Sex is natural, as is being bi. He's in a difficult situation, one I don't envy him of. His partner has already shown that she doesn't agree with bi men, so he is unable to be open with her, so the 'morally correct' option is he would leave, but he loves her so leaving her will probably break his heart, and hers, and they may never recover from the heartache.It's an awful situation to be in, and I'd like to see how those of you who judge him harshly would deal with it if you were in a similar situation.

the morally correct option was not to get into the relationship in the first place, knowing what he was sexually and how he felt."

You know what? Maybe, just maybe he fell in love with her and thought he could make it work with her. Perhaps he thought he wouldn't need to see men. Must be great living in your blank and white world

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

A different perspective. When I first joined Fab I was principled and wouldn't meet married or attached guys. Rightly or wrongly I do meet them now. Meets aren't regular but they are a lot of fun.

Fab is full of married and attached people playing without their partner’s knowledge for a variety of reasons. As long as your prepared for the aftermath if your partner did find out then continue as you are. Some people can’t live with the guilt of cheating on their partner whilst for others it helps to keep them together. I’m never going to ask anyone to leave their partner, that’s not why I play with them.

I’d remove the pics with the female in them though.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lkDomWhtSubBiCpleCouple
over a year ago

Somewhere / Everywhere /Kinksville


"You could kick the cock “habit” if you chose to. However, as you’re already on here behind her back looking for meets with women then i’d say you don’t respect her or love her enough to even try.

She deserves a bloke who is honest and loyal.

You need to find someone who matches you sexually and who you care enough about to be 100% honest with because seriously, you’re just being selfish.

Why some men make their life so complicated is beyond me.

I don't think people choos to be bi, so they can't help that complication. I agree that he should find someone who he can be his true self with, but agein, that's not easy as everyone on here knows. It is possible to love someone deeply but yet still need/want to have the 'bi side' also physically satisfied. Sex is natural, as is being bi. He's in a difficult situation, one I don't envy him of. His partner has already shown that she doesn't agree with bi men, so he is unable to be open with her, so the 'morally correct' option is he would leave, but he loves her so leaving her will probably break his heart, and hers, and they may never recover from the heartache.It's an awful situation to be in, and I'd like to see how those of you who judge him harshly would deal with it if you were in a similar situation.

the morally correct option was not to get into the relationship in the first place, knowing what he was sexually and how he felt.

You know what? Maybe, just maybe he fell in love with her and thought he could make it work with her. Perhaps he thought he wouldn't need to see men. Must be great living in your blank and white world "

Yes it is now thanks

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nasty piece of work if you ask me, which you sort of did.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"You could kick the cock “habit” if you chose to. However, as you’re already on here behind her back looking for meets with women then i’d say you don’t respect her or love her enough to even try.

She deserves a bloke who is honest and loyal.

You need to find someone who matches you sexually and who you care enough about to be 100% honest with because seriously, you’re just being selfish.

Why some men make their life so complicated is beyond me.

I don't think people choos to be bi, so they can't help that complication. I agree that he should find someone who he can be his true self with, but agein, that's not easy as everyone on here knows. It is possible to love someone deeply but yet still need/want to have the 'bi side' also physically satisfied. Sex is natural, as is being bi. He's in a difficult situation, one I don't envy him of. His partner has already shown that she doesn't agree with bi men, so he is unable to be open with her, so the 'morally correct' option is he would leave, but he loves her so leaving her will probably break his heart, and hers, and they may never recover from the heartache.It's an awful situation to be in, and I'd like to see how those of you who judge him harshly would deal with it if you were in a similar situation.

the morally correct option was not to get into the relationship in the first place, knowing what he was sexually and how he felt."

A lot of people outside of the swinging community would consider your use of the term ‘morally correct’ to be so far away from the accepted use to be almost incomprehensible.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *y Favorite PornstarCouple
over a year ago

Basingstoke


"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock!

I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?"

I believe you love her, the people talking otherwise are full of shit. However, love doesn't mean you are long-term compatible and you too clearly aren't. You need to man up and dump her. She'll never be ask kinky as you want and you'll never be faithful as she wants. The longer you leave it then the worse the break up will be.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

Since you're looking for women too its not just a problem with cock op.

It doesn't sound like she's enough for you,so it's either carry on cheating and hope she never finds out.Or do the right thing and talk to her about it all,the desire to have sex with men and women and see if there's any compromise.

You may think she has no idea ,but things tend to come back and bite you on the arse when you don't expect it.

Miss

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London


"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock!

I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?

I believe you love her, the people talking otherwise are full of shit. However, love doesn't mean you are long-term compatible and you too clearly aren't. You need to man up and dump her. She'll never be ask kinky as you want and you'll never be faithful as she wants. The longer you leave it then the worse the break up will be."

If loving her doesn't mean he has to be honest with her and doesn't mean they are long term compatible, what on earth does it mean?

Serious question by the way. The word "love" is bandied around so much yet it seems to mean completely different things to different people.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock!

I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?

I believe you love her, the people talking otherwise are full of shit. However, love doesn't mean you are long-term compatible and you too clearly aren't. You need to man up and dump her. She'll never be ask kinky as you want and you'll never be faithful as she wants. The longer you leave it then the worse the break up will be.

If loving her doesn't mean he has to be honest with her and doesn't mean they are long term compatible, what on earth does it mean?

Serious question by the way. The word "love" is bandied around so much yet it seems to mean completely different things to different people. "

Some people sometimes confuse love with financial support...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *8m00kWoman
over a year ago

balby

[Removed by poster at 23/05/18 09:32:06]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *8m00kWoman
over a year ago

balby


"There's a guy i know, he's stuck in a vanilla relationship. He knows im on here and really wants to suck cock and be fucked by a guy whilst performing oral on me etc... he cant tell his gf as he doesn't want her to laugh at him. I get him completely. He will live out his fantasy one day im sure of it if iv got anything to do with it. It's much harder for men... There seems to be more stigma around guys on guys than women together. Personally its a huge turn on for me. "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Some people sometimes confuse love with financial support..."

Never a truer word spoken

But back to the OP

If you love her let her go.

She deserves better!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London

I think the reality here is that OP has got a nice comfortable relationship with someone he quite likes and doesn't want to lose that. At the same time he doesn't have the moral strength to give up something he knows would devastate his partner if she knew about it.

That's not a criticism by the way. Most of us been in situations where we take the easy option whilst knowing it is morally indefensible.

However, if you ask people what you should do, they are always going to tell you to be moral.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *y Favorite PornstarCouple
over a year ago

Basingstoke


"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock!

I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?

I believe you love her, the people talking otherwise are full of shit. However, love doesn't mean you are long-term compatible and you too clearly aren't. You need to man up and dump her. She'll never be ask kinky as you want and you'll never be faithful as she wants. The longer you leave it then the worse the break up will be.

If loving her doesn't mean he has to be honest with her and doesn't mean they are long term compatible, what on earth does it mean?

Serious question by the way. The word "love" is bandied around so much yet it seems to mean completely different things to different people. "

In truth it means absolutely fuck all. Any sensible language would have multiple words for all the things we lump onto "love", but we're stuck with a catch all word that means everything and therefore nothing. Put it this way, love is a terrible basis for marriage in my opinion.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do what you want OP, for me personally, I wouldn't want to waste my life with someone I didn't respect.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London


"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock!

I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?

I believe you love her, the people talking otherwise are full of shit. However, love doesn't mean you are long-term compatible and you too clearly aren't. You need to man up and dump her. She'll never be ask kinky as you want and you'll never be faithful as she wants. The longer you leave it then the worse the break up will be.

If loving her doesn't mean he has to be honest with her and doesn't mean they are long term compatible, what on earth does it mean?

Serious question by the way. The word "love" is bandied around so much yet it seems to mean completely different things to different people.

In truth it means absolutely fuck all. Any sensible language would have multiple words for all the things we lump onto "love", but we're stuck with a catch all word that means everything and therefore nothing. Put it this way, love is a terrible basis for marriage in my opinion. "

If it means fuck all than its difficult to see how you can say you believe he loves her, given that you must think "I love x" is a meaningless statement.

I tend to agree with you for what it's worth. What I think he means by "love" is that he gets on OK. With this woman, quite likes her and likes the emotional support the relationship gives him. None of this however means he is willing to put what matters to her above what matters to him.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *y Favorite PornstarCouple
over a year ago

Basingstoke


"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock!

I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?

I believe you love her, the people talking otherwise are full of shit. However, love doesn't mean you are long-term compatible and you too clearly aren't. You need to man up and dump her. She'll never be ask kinky as you want and you'll never be faithful as she wants. The longer you leave it then the worse the break up will be.

If loving her doesn't mean he has to be honest with her and doesn't mean they are long term compatible, what on earth does it mean?

Serious question by the way. The word "love" is bandied around so much yet it seems to mean completely different things to different people.

In truth it means absolutely fuck all. Any sensible language would have multiple words for all the things we lump onto "love", but we're stuck with a catch all word that means everything and therefore nothing. Put it this way, love is a terrible basis for marriage in my opinion.

If it means fuck all than its difficult to see how you can say you believe he loves her, given that you must think "I love x" is a meaningless statement.

I tend to agree with you for what it's worth. What I think he means by "love" is that he gets on OK. With this woman, quite likes her and likes the emotional support the relationship gives him. None of this however means he is willing to put what matters to her above what matters to him. "

To clarify, he 'loves' her as much as the average toss pot who uses the same word and doesn't cheat on his partner. Inertia is the glue of most relationships. The ones proclaiming their love from the rooftops always break up when the passion inevitably fades.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London


"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock!

I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?

I believe you love her, the people talking otherwise are full of shit. However, love doesn't mean you are long-term compatible and you too clearly aren't. You need to man up and dump her. She'll never be ask kinky as you want and you'll never be faithful as she wants. The longer you leave it then the worse the break up will be.

If loving her doesn't mean he has to be honest with her and doesn't mean they are long term compatible, what on earth does it mean?

Serious question by the way. The word "love" is bandied around so much yet it seems to mean completely different things to different people.

In truth it means absolutely fuck all. Any sensible language would have multiple words for all the things we lump onto "love", but we're stuck with a catch all word that means everything and therefore nothing. Put it this way, love is a terrible basis for marriage in my opinion.

If it means fuck all than its difficult to see how you can say you believe he loves her, given that you must think "I love x" is a meaningless statement.

I tend to agree with you for what it's worth. What I think he means by "love" is that he gets on OK. With this woman, quite likes her and likes the emotional support the relationship gives him. None of this however means he is willing to put what matters to her above what matters to him.

To clarify, he 'loves' her as much as the average toss pot who uses the same word and doesn't cheat on his partner. Inertia is the glue of most relationships. The ones proclaiming their love from the rooftops always break up when the passion inevitably fades. "

I can't agree with that. If we use "love" as a synonym for liking and caring for someone, it's clear that someone who doesn't do something he would like to do because he knows doing it would seriously upset his partner loves his partner more than someone who goes ahead and does it anyway.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *olden_Road_to_SamarkandMan
over a year ago

North Wessex Downs

I think you should lay off the site for a while and spend 100% of your time trying to introduce her to swinging- even if it just starts off by watching porn/ suggesting you could both go to a club and watch it for real. Progress things from there and see if she's up for it. How gutting would it be if aged 80 if, after you'd forgone any fun for years, she said she'd have been up for it!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *olden_Road_to_SamarkandMan
over a year ago

North Wessex Downs

...and ignore the moral criticism. My view is to let people do what they feel is right within the bounds of a relationship that only they really understand. Moral outrage is always a bit rich. I reckon at least 95% of the guys on here would shag a woman with a boyfriend if they thought they could get away with it.....giving you a hard time, as a guy, is just hitting an easy target.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London


"...and ignore the moral criticism. My view is to let people do what they feel is right within the bounds of a relationship that only they really understand. Moral outrage is always a bit rich. I reckon at least 95% of the guys on here would shag a woman with a boyfriend if they thought they could get away with it.....giving you a hard time, as a guy, is just hitting an easy target."

The fact that all of us are morally flawed doesn't mean that statements we make about morality are incorrect.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I was pregnant my other half was on here cheating on me , I had no idea until I saw it on his phone. I was pregnant had nowhere to go and am now stuck with him unhappy and constantly agruing. Not if she finds out but when u will break her heart. You need to end your relationship or end this profile and be faithful because it won't work out how u expect. Women always find out the truth. Always.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *y Favorite PornstarCouple
over a year ago

Basingstoke


"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock!

I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?

I believe you love her, the people talking otherwise are full of shit. However, love doesn't mean you are long-term compatible and you too clearly aren't. You need to man up and dump her. She'll never be ask kinky as you want and you'll never be faithful as she wants. The longer you leave it then the worse the break up will be.

If loving her doesn't mean he has to be honest with her and doesn't mean they are long term compatible, what on earth does it mean?

Serious question by the way. The word "love" is bandied around so much yet it seems to mean completely different things to different people.

In truth it means absolutely fuck all. Any sensible language would have multiple words for all the things we lump onto "love", but we're stuck with a catch all word that means everything and therefore nothing. Put it this way, love is a terrible basis for marriage in my opinion.

If it means fuck all than its difficult to see how you can say you believe he loves her, given that you must think "I love x" is a meaningless statement.

I tend to agree with you for what it's worth. What I think he means by "love" is that he gets on OK. With this woman, quite likes her and likes the emotional support the relationship gives him. None of this however means he is willing to put what matters to her above what matters to him.

To clarify, he 'loves' her as much as the average toss pot who uses the same word and doesn't cheat on his partner. Inertia is the glue of most relationships. The ones proclaiming their love from the rooftops always break up when the passion inevitably fades.

I can't agree with that. If we use "love" as a synonym for liking and caring for someone, it's clear that someone who doesn't do something he would like to do because he knows doing it would seriously upset his partner loves his partner more than someone who goes ahead and does it anyway. "

As i say, you can't have a serious discussion about love in english. Imho.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London


"I'd been with my girlfriend for 4 years and she's wonderful. However, I still find myself meeting up with guys for fun (infrequently usually). I met guys before I got with her and although I try my best to stop, after a few months I relapse and need to suck cock!

I know everyone will say that I can't love her if I do this but I really do and I know she's the girl I will marry. But my dirty bisexual side always seems to come out to say hello once in a while. My gf is pretty vanilla and wouldn't be up for threesomes/bi fun etc. Any other guys find themselves in this position with their girlfriend or wife? How do you deal with it?

I believe you love her, the people talking otherwise are full of shit. However, love doesn't mean you are long-term compatible and you too clearly aren't. You need to man up and dump her. She'll never be ask kinky as you want and you'll never be faithful as she wants. The longer you leave it then the worse the break up will be.

If loving her doesn't mean he has to be honest with her and doesn't mean they are long term compatible, what on earth does it mean?

Serious question by the way. The word "love" is bandied around so much yet it seems to mean completely different things to different people.

In truth it means absolutely fuck all. Any sensible language would have multiple words for all the things we lump onto "love", but we're stuck with a catch all word that means everything and therefore nothing. Put it this way, love is a terrible basis for marriage in my opinion.

If it means fuck all than its difficult to see how you can say you believe he loves her, given that you must think "I love x" is a meaningless statement.

I tend to agree with you for what it's worth. What I think he means by "love" is that he gets on OK. With this woman, quite likes her and likes the emotional support the relationship gives him. None of this however means he is willing to put what matters to her above what matters to him.

To clarify, he 'loves' her as much as the average toss pot who uses the same word and doesn't cheat on his partner. Inertia is the glue of most relationships. The ones proclaiming their love from the rooftops always break up when the passion inevitably fades.

I can't agree with that. If we use "love" as a synonym for liking and caring for someone, it's clear that someone who doesn't do something he would like to do because he knows doing it would seriously upset his partner loves his partner more than someone who goes ahead and does it anyway.

As i say, you can't have a serious discussion about love in english. Imho."

Well. I certainly think we can say he cares less about her than someone who also had the urge to secretly suck random penises, but doesn't act on the urge.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *y Favorite PornstarCouple
over a year ago

Basingstoke


"

Well. I certainly think we can say he cares less about her than someone who also had the urge to secretly suck random penises, but doesn't act on the urge. "

Disagree. The repression of urges is effectively the allocation of energy for that purpose. Therefore, it is being taken away from another potential use. You're inferring a value judgement on the use of energy that i don't agree with.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London


"

Well. I certainly think we can say he cares less about her than someone who also had the urge to secretly suck random penises, but doesn't act on the urge.

Disagree. The repression of urges is effectively the allocation of energy for that purpose. Therefore, it is being taken away from another potential use. You're inferring a value judgement on the use of energy that i don't agree with. "

You've lost me.

I am just going on the common sense view that if you want to do something that you know will hurt and upset your partner you have the choice whether or not to do it. If you do do it, by definition you care more about satisfying your own desires that you care about your partners feelings.

That's not a moral judgment per se . It's only a moral judgment if you hold the view that doing things that hurt your partner are always wrong. Some systems of morality may argue its always right to satisfy one's own desires and that one should not live for others.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *exyFusionCouple
over a year ago

Near to you

You're obviously not compatible. Man up and tell her the truth before she wastes more years of her life believing a lie. As others have said, it WILL come to light eventually - the longer you deceive her the worse the truth will be. You know what you're currently doing is not fair. Have a shred of decency and stop wasting this woman's life.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *y Favorite PornstarCouple
over a year ago

Basingstoke


"

Well. I certainly think we can say he cares less about her than someone who also had the urge to secretly suck random penises, but doesn't act on the urge.

Disagree. The repression of urges is effectively the allocation of energy for that purpose. Therefore, it is being taken away from another potential use. You're inferring a value judgement on the use of energy that i don't agree with.

You've lost me.

I am just going on the common sense view that if you want to do something that you know will hurt and upset your partner you have the choice whether or not to do it. If you do do it, by definition you care more about satisfying your own desires that you care about your partners feelings.

That's not a moral judgment per se . It's only a moral judgment if you hold the view that doing things that hurt your partner are always wrong. Some systems of morality may argue its always right to satisfy one's own desires and that one should not live for others. "

Mark wants to suck cocks but his girlfriend susie doesn't want him to. So mark is depressed and sits at home all day playing video games to take his mind off how much he wants cock. Susie thinks he's a loser and needs to get a job.

Michael works his ass off to give his family a great life. He's a role model to his kids in every way except one. He's a secret cock sucker. Once a month he goes and sucks a juicy fat one after work and then goes home and plays happy families.

Are we saying that mark loves susie or is a better partner to susie than michael is to his partner?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Well. I certainly think we can say he cares less about her than someone who also had the urge to secretly suck random penises, but doesn't act on the urge.

Disagree. The repression of urges is effectively the allocation of energy for that purpose. Therefore, it is being taken away from another potential use. You're inferring a value judgement on the use of energy that i don't agree with.

You've lost me.

I am just going on the common sense view that if you want to do something that you know will hurt and upset your partner you have the choice whether or not to do it. If you do do it, by definition you care more about satisfying your own desires that you care about your partners feelings.

That's not a moral judgment per se . It's only a moral judgment if you hold the view that doing things that hurt your partner are always wrong. Some systems of morality may argue its always right to satisfy one's own desires and that one should not live for others.

Mark wants to suck cocks but his girlfriend susie doesn't want him to. So mark is depressed and sits at home all day playing video games to take his mind off how much he wants cock. Susie thinks he's a loser and needs to get a job.

Michael works his ass off to give his family a great life. He's a role model to his kids in every way except one. He's a secret cock sucker. Once a month he goes and sucks a juicy fat one after work and then goes home and plays happy families.

Are we saying that mark loves susie or is a better partner to susie than michael is to his partner? "

I'd say that's the partner's call, not ours, and without knowledge, how can informed choices be made?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London


"

Well. I certainly think we can say he cares less about her than someone who also had the urge to secretly suck random penises, but doesn't act on the urge.

Disagree. The repression of urges is effectively the allocation of energy for that purpose. Therefore, it is being taken away from another potential use. You're inferring a value judgement on the use of energy that i don't agree with.

You've lost me.

I am just going on the common sense view that if you want to do something that you know will hurt and upset your partner you have the choice whether or not to do it. If you do do it, by definition you care more about satisfying your own desires that you care about your partners feelings.

That's not a moral judgment per se . It's only a moral judgment if you hold the view that doing things that hurt your partner are always wrong. Some systems of morality may argue its always right to satisfy one's own desires and that one should not live for others.

Mark wants to suck cocks but his girlfriend susie doesn't want him to. So mark is depressed and sits at home all day playing video games to take his mind off how much he wants cock. Susie thinks he's a loser and needs to get a job.

Michael works his ass off to give his family a great life. He's a role model to his kids in every way except one. He's a secret cock sucker. Once a month he goes and sucks a juicy fat one after work and then goes home and plays happy families.

Are we saying that mark loves susie or is a better partner to susie than michael is to his partner? "

Obviously that's loaded with assumptions. That if one doesn't suck cock when one has the urge to do so, one becomes a complete no hoper.

On any event, if caring about someone means anything, it means being attentive to what they want, not what you think they should want. I rather suspect most women would prefer to have a partner who plays an excessive amount of video games than one who has sex with men behind their backs.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *y Favorite PornstarCouple
over a year ago

Basingstoke


"

Well. I certainly think we can say he cares less about her than someone who also had the urge to secretly suck random penises, but doesn't act on the urge.

Disagree. The repression of urges is effectively the allocation of energy for that purpose. Therefore, it is being taken away from another potential use. You're inferring a value judgement on the use of energy that i don't agree with.

You've lost me.

I am just going on the common sense view that if you want to do something that you know will hurt and upset your partner you have the choice whether or not to do it. If you do do it, by definition you care more about satisfying your own desires that you care about your partners feelings.

That's not a moral judgment per se . It's only a moral judgment if you hold the view that doing things that hurt your partner are always wrong. Some systems of morality may argue its always right to satisfy one's own desires and that one should not live for others.

Mark wants to suck cocks but his girlfriend susie doesn't want him to. So mark is depressed and sits at home all day playing video games to take his mind off how much he wants cock. Susie thinks he's a loser and needs to get a job.

Michael works his ass off to give his family a great life. He's a role model to his kids in every way except one. He's a secret cock sucker. Once a month he goes and sucks a juicy fat one after work and then goes home and plays happy families.

Are we saying that mark loves susie or is a better partner to susie than michael is to his partner?

I'd say that's the partner's call, not ours, and without knowledge, how can informed choices be made?"

I agree. It's subjective. All we know about the OP is he's a cock sucker. We don't know all the other factors.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *y Favorite PornstarCouple
over a year ago

Basingstoke


"

Well. I certainly think we can say he cares less about her than someone who also had the urge to secretly suck random penises, but doesn't act on the urge.

Disagree. The repression of urges is effectively the allocation of energy for that purpose. Therefore, it is being taken away from another potential use. You're inferring a value judgement on the use of energy that i don't agree with.

You've lost me.

I am just going on the common sense view that if you want to do something that you know will hurt and upset your partner you have the choice whether or not to do it. If you do do it, by definition you care more about satisfying your own desires that you care about your partners feelings.

That's not a moral judgment per se . It's only a moral judgment if you hold the view that doing things that hurt your partner are always wrong. Some systems of morality may argue its always right to satisfy one's own desires and that one should not live for others.

Mark wants to suck cocks but his girlfriend susie doesn't want him to. So mark is depressed and sits at home all day playing video games to take his mind off how much he wants cock. Susie thinks he's a loser and needs to get a job.

Michael works his ass off to give his family a great life. He's a role model to his kids in every way except one. He's a secret cock sucker. Once a month he goes and sucks a juicy fat one after work and then goes home and plays happy families.

Are we saying that mark loves susie or is a better partner to susie than michael is to his partner?

Obviously that's loaded with assumptions. That if one doesn't suck cock when one has the urge to do so, one becomes a complete no hoper.

On any event, if caring about someone means anything, it means being attentive to what they want, not what you think they should want. I rather suspect most women would prefer to have a partner who plays an excessive amount of video games than one who has sex with men behind their backs.

"

I don't but i can't prove the case either way. I just know a lot of women who perfect the blind eye technique.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just let her go OP

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro

Its only a matter of time before she finds out and she will.

Treat others as you would like to be treated be honest be open with integrity.

Think how you would feel if it was the other way round but you are prepared to do that to someone you "love" all for the sake of sucking a cock and the fact you are on here is another story you are dishonest, disloyal and a player so let her have a life based on true love not this bull-shit.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top