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The Other Half!!!

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By *_Yeah19 OP   Couple
over a year ago

Lincoln

Is the male half of the couple ever thought about when viewing a profile with a view to meeting etc? We take time to make our profile equal with lots of pics of both of us, but when messages are received, its primarily aimed at TB regardless of whether it’s the male or female sending.

I ask, as I’m now in the most awesome of relationships, but feel pretty much a spare part when it comes to fab

Previously on here as a single guy for 8 years, and grateful to be popular with both ladies and couples, I had an amazing time where I was messaged lots and had plenty of meets Even had a crazy 6 months of total mayhem when I worked a bar at a swinging venue. But now it’s like I’m a tag along extra and to be honest, it has dented my confidence a little!!!!

I know we wouldn’t get meets if the fem didn’t want to play with me, but unfortunately now, every bit of interest and build up is always aimed at TB which I kinda understand as she’s f’ing hot it’s just that I miss the flirting, the attention, the compliments and the chemistry building that made meets on here so hot.

Playing on my own or having a single profile again isn’t an option as I’ve moved on from that and swinging just wouldn’t be the same without TB, just posting to see if this other males on cpl’s profiles on feel the same.

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By *orkie321bWoman
over a year ago

Nottingham

It's pretty common for people to only address the female half of a couple, both on fab and at swingers clubs and many couples choose not to interact with those that do this.

Many couples make the mistake of only having pictures of the lady which does perpetuate the problem. Even when people do have pictures of both they usually have far more of the lady than there are of the man.

I did notice this was the case with your profile OP - you have 12 pictures that feature the man but over 40 that show the lady. I'm not sure if having a more equal mix would make a difference but it might be worth a try.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When we get messages directed primarily at one or the other of us we will turn the conversation round and make sure that those we ate speaking to know that they are talking to a couple and that it's about both of us.

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By *itvclaireTV/TS
over a year ago

Birmingham

I’ve always addressed my messages to both halves of the couple. After I’m looking to play with both of them.

XX

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By *_Yeah19 OP   Couple
over a year ago

Lincoln


"I’ve always addressed my messages to both halves of the couple. After I’m looking to play with both of them.

XX"

I used to always direct chat to both when I was a single too even though it was only the fem I was playing with. I still chat and exchange messages with TB, but when I try and turn it into flirtatious banter, it’s then that the focus shifts on to TB

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In our experience most people address us as a couple even though 99% of messages are from single men.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would also address both parts of the couple. I like it when each message is signed off as being from one or both but it's not a deal-breaker. I assume that both people in the couple share messages and answer from both of them anyway.

OP - you're both gorgeous and I'd happily have one or both of you if we were closer hehe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Evening all.

I get that... currently have a bombardment of males from single males who are talking directly at me (Miss here).

It doesn’t really phase me as I’d rather men aimed their message to me and not as if I was property. Each to their own of course. My partner and I read all messages. As I’m sure a lot here know already, it’s amazing some of the messages you get!

Lx

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

Awwwwwwwwwwwwww.....

Given that there are I'm guessing loads more straight men than bi men on here I'd say you might have to get used to that.

But don't worry SSS we all know you're super hot x

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

..

I haven’t directly messaged a couple first but I have chatted with lots of couples. I find it’s often one of them that takes the lead in chatting and that seems to be the male but when I reply, I reply to both equally.

Btw you are definitely hot tottie!

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By *_Yeah19 OP   Couple
over a year ago

Lincoln


"Awwwwwwwwwwwwww.....

Given that there are I'm guessing loads more straight men than bi men on here I'd say you might have to get used to that.

But don't worry SSS we all know you're super hot x"

Mmmmm, thanks gorgeous as are you

But I hope everyone doesn’t think I’m fishing for compliments as I get those, especially from TB

Couples do chat to me, but it’s of the polite introductory stuff not the sexual banter that usually builds up to an explosive can wait to rip your clothes of meet lol!!! that is when it tends to be solely orientated on TB no matter how much I try to get involved

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would have to desire both man and woman.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We get messages to us both generally butbyes do get a fair few only commenting on me not MrH.

We don’t really entertain those as we are a couple and fortunately those we’ve met it’s been a 4 way attraction so not been an issue. You are both absolutely gorgeous though! Try not to worry!!

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By *a Fee VerteWoman
over a year ago

Limbo


"Awwwwwwwwwwwwww.....

Given that there are I'm guessing loads more straight men than bi men on here I'd say you might have to get used to that.

But don't worry SSS we all know you're super hot x

Mmmmm, thanks gorgeous as are you

But I hope everyone doesn’t think I’m fishing for compliments as I get those, especially from TB

Couples do chat to me, but it’s of the polite introductory stuff not the sexual banter that usually builds up to an explosive can wait to rip your clothes of meet lol!!! that is when it tends to be solely orientated on TB no matter how much I try to get involved

"

Maybe all these fems are taking one for the team??

Seriously ... although this is going to sound a bit stupid, I'd feel somewhat inhibited getting too sexy/flirty with the male half of a couple I hadn't met yet. I guess I wouldn't want to step on any toes until I'd sussed both halves of the couple out for real and could reassure myself they were both 100% okay with it. If that makes sense. Maybe other women feel the same?

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By *y Favorite PornstarCouple
over a year ago

Basingstoke

As a rule of thumb, we never message couples that have some variation of the headline "looking for a unicorn... or couple". We rarely have the problem you describe.

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By *_Yeah19 OP   Couple
over a year ago

Lincoln


"Awwwwwwwwwwwwww.....

Given that there are I'm guessing loads more straight men than bi men on here I'd say you might have to get used to that.

But don't worry SSS we all know you're super hot x

Mmmmm, thanks gorgeous as are you

But I hope everyone doesn’t think I’m fishing for compliments as I get those, especially from TB

Couples do chat to me, but it’s of the polite introductory stuff not the sexual banter that usually builds up to an explosive can wait to rip your clothes of meet lol!!! that is when it tends to be solely orientated on TB no matter how much I try to get involved

Maybe all these fems are taking one for the team??

Seriously ... although this is going to sound a bit stupid, I'd feel somewhat inhibited getting too sexy/flirty with the male half of a couple I hadn't met yet. I guess I wouldn't want to step on any toes until I'd sussed both halves of the couple out for real and could reassure myself they were both 100% okay with it. If that makes sense. Maybe other women feel the same?"

Yeah, good point hadn’t really thought about that

I do try to keep to a 4way build up type conversation so everyone gets involved, but maybe I’m not as good as that like I used to be when it was just me

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By *eardsandboobsCouple
over a year ago

north of lincoln

beards feels the same way. We get loads of messages but all mainly men asking to meet up or sometimes it’s coupoes that are mainly after a bi female It’s very rare that we get a message from a female enquiringly about him.

So he feels like any potential meets aren’t quite as exciting as he is just there for the numbers.

However we find it very frustrating that most couples never show the male half . I get bored of clicking on a couple profile and seeing 20 pics of the female and 1 pic of a guys dick. Surely it makes sense to put the male on as that’s the person who is gonna ignite the chance of a female in a couple wanting to message them.

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By *_Yeah19 OP   Couple
over a year ago

Lincoln


"beards feels the same way. We get loads of messages but all mainly men asking to meet up or sometimes it’s coupoes that are mainly after a bi female It’s very rare that we get a message from a female enquiringly about him.

So he feels like any potential meets aren’t quite as exciting as he is just there for the numbers.

However we find it very frustrating that most couples never show the male half . I get bored of clicking on a couple profile and seeing 20 pics of the female and 1 pic of a guys dick. Surely it makes sense to put the male on as that’s the person who is gonna ignite the chance of a female in a couple wanting to message them. "

This more or less hits the nail on the head there is now quite a few pics of me (mainly because I’m now toned up) and more planned so wlll see if it changes

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By *edoriartyCouple
over a year ago

Peterborough

Until very recently Red described herself as straight. That makes it more difficult to find compatible couples as bi fem couples dominate and for many girl on girl seems important, but at least when we do manage to get into conversation with straight couples I (M) knew there was a reasonable chance they were interested in me and weren't chatting just to get to Red.

Now that Red is feeling a little more confident about women and has changed her description to bi curious I wonder will I be somewhat sidelined in conversations, as she becomes the focus for all the bi fem couples for whom girl on girl is a priority.

In a "bi-fem" couple is the guy less important than in a straight couple when it comes to attracting potential meets, Is that why in our experience there are less pictures of the guy on bi-fem couples profiles than their are on straight couples profiles?

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By *_Yeah19 OP   Couple
over a year ago

Lincoln


"Until very recently Red described herself as straight. That makes it more difficult to find compatible couples as bi fem couples dominate and for many girl on girl seems important, but at least when we do manage to get into conversation with straight couples I (M) knew there was a reasonable chance they were interested in me and weren't chatting just to get to Red.

Now that Red is feeling a little more confident about women and has changed her description to bi curious I wonder will I be somewhat sidelined in conversations, as she becomes the focus for all the bi fem couples for whom girl on girl is a priority.

In a "bi-fem" couple is the guy less important than in a straight couple when it comes to attracting potential meets, Is that why in our experience there are less pictures of the guy on bi-fem couples profiles than their are on straight couples profiles?"

Maybe I should make it a little clearer on our profile that we are not predominantly looking for bi-fem cpls and it’s just an added bonus if they are. Also be a little clearer about this from the start too when they message us

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By *edoriartyCouple
over a year ago

Peterborough


"Until very recently Red described herself as straight. That makes it more difficult to find compatible couples as bi fem couples dominate and for many girl on girl seems important, but at least when we do manage to get into conversation with straight couples I (M) knew there was a reasonable chance they were interested in me and weren't chatting just to get to Red.

Now that Red is feeling a little more confident about women and has changed her description to bi curious I wonder will I be somewhat sidelined in conversations, as she becomes the focus for all the bi fem couples for whom girl on girl is a priority.

In a "bi-fem" couple is the guy less important than in a straight couple when it comes to attracting potential meets, Is that why in our experience there are less pictures of the guy on bi-fem couples profiles than their are on straight couples profiles?

Maybe I should make it a little clearer on our profile that we are not predominantly looking for bi-fem cpls and it’s just an added bonus if they are. Also be a little clearer about this from the start too when they message us "

I think when we see a couple is bi-fem it concerns us that it's very important or the main focus for them, as it really isn't for us. If a profile is clear about whether that is or isn't the case we do find it pretty helpful. Thinking about it maybe our profile isn't clear enough about that now!

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