FabSwingers.com forum: Couples

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Why do some people think that its ok to chat to the lady in a couple but then deliberately blank the male partner?

This is something we have noticed, and find extremely annoying. We give three opportunities then blank them for being rude. What do other couples think of this and how do you handle it.

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By *YLINDERCouple
over a year ago

CARDIFF

we find this too .we only come as a couple so if they are not prepared to chat to hubby too then no meet likely

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By *thwalescplCouple
over a year ago

brecon

We find the same in the chatrooms.

I (Martin) tend to be in there the most, and we get single guys pm'ing us. They tend to ask who is typing, and when I say its me..... poof, there they were, gone!!!

Needless to say, the block button gets a pounding lol!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This happens and SOME single males will never learn unfortunately

My ex never stood for it if the male ignored me if I was there (usually at clubs or socials) then she didn't play

Same applies to my OH

It's just common courtesy and it also applies to single fems now and again too

If the single fem ignores me OH then the conversation stops wi me too xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we find the same, they will chat if its the wife but not hubby and in the chatroom when i say wife is not here they just blank you

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By *LBishCouple
over a year ago

near bury st edmunds

Wish single guys would pay attention to some forum post on how to get the best from fab, like this one. WE hate it too and the guys we have met off fab so far are the ones who have sent us messages chatting to us both. Think they would have sussed it out by now x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If my hubby's presence gets ignored I nearly ALWAYS ignore the guy messaging.

One numpty wrote out a real full on fantasy (99% sure it was a copy n paste job exhausted on single women) that totally dismissed the fact that I am one half of a couple. He got a reply though.... let's call it a non abusive but irritating flea in his ear

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

We would walk away if Rob was blanked while we were out,can't say its ever happened though,even when we've been apart and chatting to other people its always been the case that each of us has been able to just come over and join in

On here its different as its only me thats chats anyway but if guys that want to meet forget I have a husband I get bored very quickly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Perhaps if couples had pictures of the male on their avatar as well, you know, as an aid memoir to the simple single guys instead of only the female displaying her wears, this wouldn't happen.

Just a thought!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's not just single men that are guilty of this. Plenty of couples who struggle to find the elusive bi-fem see to see a couple as the answer.

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

I find it extremely annoying when the male of the couple contacts me not saying which person it is speaking..often the partner is not aware he is attempting to chat .

. In my opinion ..males make couple profile to make them more acceptable

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Perhaps if couples had pictures of the male on their avatar as well, you know, as an aid memoir to the simple single guys instead of only the female displaying her wears, this wouldn't happen.

Just a thought!

Really? You think so?

Some only look at the pics on the profile... some don't even bother looking at anything because their todger is doing the typing

Single men have ignored my hubby in a club even when in holding his hand

....these men are pig ignorant and having a pic of us both as an avatar on a swinging site isn't going to change their attitudes one jot

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Have an image of a todger typing on a keyboard now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Perhaps if couples had pictures of the male on their avatar as well, you know, as an aid memoir to the simple single guys instead of only the female displaying her wears, this wouldn't happen.

Just a thought!

Really? You think so?

Some only look at the pics on the profile... some don't even bother looking at anything because their todger is doing the typing

Single men have ignored my hubby in a club even when in holding his hand

....these men are pig ignorant and having a pic of us both as an avatar on a swinging site isn't going to change their attitudes one jot

*I'm rather

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have an image of a todger typing on a keyboard now

Welcome to my world

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Perhaps if couples had pictures of the male on their avatar as well, you know, as an aid memoir to the simple single guys instead of only the female displaying her wears, this wouldn't happen.

Just a thought!

I want to get meets not scare the buggers off with pics of him up

So glad he doesn't use forums bless

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By *unPeteMan
over a year ago

Near Bristol

I think it's essential to have a rapport with both partners in a couple. Chatting with both facilitates that. If I don't get along with the male aswell (I'm not bi) then the meet isn't going to work for me.

Maybe some think the male is really single and masquerading as a couple?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Perhaps if couples had pictures of the male on their avatar as well, you know, as an aid memoir to the simple single guys instead of only the female displaying her wears, this wouldn't happen.

Just a thought!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I find it extremely annoying when the male of the couple contacts me not saying which person it is speaking..often the partner is not aware he is attempting to chat .

. In my opinion ..males make couple profile to make them more acceptable"

Acceptable in more way? That doesn't make sense?

As for saying who is typing, speaking from a personal perspective, it almost always 2wheels on the forum, messaging or in chat (unless we cam). If people read it it states it on the profile I feel no need to make people aware of that when messaging them. Boho-J is happy for me to be messaging people, she trusts my judgement. In chat oit's slightly different if I get a PM I always say it's just me which invariably with single men

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Perhaps if couples had pictures of the male on their avatar as well, you know, as an aid memoir to the simple single guys instead of only the female displaying her wears, this wouldn't happen.

Just a thought!

Really? You think so?

Some only look at the pics on the profile... some don't even bother looking at anything because their todger is doing the typing

Single men have ignored my hubby in a club even when in holding his hand

....these men are pig ignorant and having a pic of us both as an avatar on a swinging site isn't going to change their attitudes one jot

Wait a minute...

"these men are pig ignorant..." First of all: Harsh! Not being funny but it's all well and good saying saying it's a single male's fault but a change in approach surely couldn't hurt.

Speaking as a "single male"

...

I was approached by a couple who had a clear profile showing them both and I personally found it quite reassuring. Think about it: You meet the couple for the first time and you recognise the wife from the photos but you don't recognise the husband because he wasn't in any. You talk with the wife more because you know her (sort of...

)so when the husband shows up, it becomes awkward so you're going to focus on the wife more.

It's about inclusion. You say it's about both of you but you're the one complaining. I'd like to here what he has to say...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Perhaps if couples had pictures of the male on their avatar as well, you know, as an aid memoir to the simple single guys instead of only the female displaying her wears, this wouldn't happen.

Just a thought!

Really? You think so?

Some only look at the pics on the profile... some don't even bother looking at anything because their todger is doing the typing

Single men have ignored my hubby in a club even when in holding his hand

....these men are pig ignorant and having a pic of us both as an avatar on a swinging site isn't going to change their attitudes one jot

Wait a minute...

"these men are pig ignorant..." First of all: Harsh! Not being funny but it's all well and good saying saying it's a single male's fault but a change in approach surely couldn't hurt.

Speaking as a "single male"

...

)so when the husband shows up, it becomes awkward so you're going to focus on the wife more.

It's about inclusion. You say it's about both of you but you're the one complaining. I'd like to here what he has to say...

How is it harsh calling an single male that comes on to the lady half of a couple whilst they are clearly stood their together in a club hand in hand "pig ignorant"? If a single male decides to only converse with the female to try and get in her knickers and not even acknowledge the male half in anyway shape or form he IS pig ignorant.

A change in approach? I'm stood their with my man and a single male comes on to me... I'm not the one doing the approaching lol.

The single guys that make an effort to get to know both halves of a couple is the one that is going to have more success naturally.

The way you have posted in reply to my comment makes me believe you think I was using sweeping generalisations.... that's not the case... I was labelling pig ignorant men as pig ignorant men

Btw... when it comes to making contact with single guys we ALWAYS send face pics of us both before arranging even a social meet.... that way the guy feels like he is talking to a couple

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"we find this too .we only come as a couple so if they are not prepared to chat to hubby too then no meet likely "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

dont understand why guys do that , couples are exactly that a couple .

ive never had an issue talking to a guy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Perhaps if couples had pictures of the male on their avatar as well, you know, as an aid memoir to the simple single guys instead of only the female displaying her wears, this wouldn't happen.

Just a thought!

Really? You think so?

Some only look at the pics on the profile... some don't even bother looking at anything because their todger is doing the typing

Single men have ignored my hubby in a club even when in holding his hand

....these men are pig ignorant and having a pic of us both as an avatar on a swinging site isn't going to change their attitudes one jot

Wait a minute...

"these men are pig ignorant..." First of all: Harsh! Not being funny but it's all well and good saying saying it's a single male's fault but a change in approach surely couldn't hurt.

Speaking as a "single male"

...

)so when the husband shows up, it becomes awkward so you're going to focus on the wife more.

It's about inclusion. You say it's about both of you but you're the one complaining. I'd like to here what he has to say...

A change in approach? I'm stood their with my man and a single male comes on to me... I'm not the one doing the approaching lol.

The single guys that make an effort to get to know both halves of a couple is the one that is going to have more success naturally.

The way you have posted in reply to my comment makes me believe you think I was using sweeping generalisations.... that's not the case... I was labelling pig ignorant men as pig ignorant men

Btw... when it comes to making contact with single guys we ALWAYS send face pics of us both before arranging even a social meet.... that way the guy feels like he is talking to a couple

I did think that you were making a sweeping generalisations. Glad to hear I was mistaken.

It's rare that I talk to couples because of the imbalance between husband and wife. It's offputting and awkward. Though there are a few gems out there I'm sure.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We get it occasionally but my favourites are when we get the "wanna fuk me" type messages and mr replies describing in graphic detail how he'd love to sink his big hard cock in their tight little arse and that soon gets rid of them!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We get it occasionally but my favourites are when we get the "wanna fuk me" type messages and mr replies describing in graphic detail how he'd love to sink his big hard cock in their tight little arse and that soon gets rid of them!!

hahahahaha that really made me laugh !

good one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

*spits tea all over the keyboard*

You owe me lady

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By *LBishCouple
over a year ago

near bury st edmunds

So got to try that one xx love it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I talk about anything really with both and is easier in person the only thing that I don't do is look him in the eyes when playing with his partner.

That's fair ??

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"I talk about anything really with both and is easier in person the only thing that I don't do is look him in the eyes when playing with his partner.

That's fair ??"

Is that because you would feel uncomfortable? Or because you think you shouldn't?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I talk about anything really with both and is easier in person the only thing that I don't do is look him in the eyes when playing with his partner.

That's fair ??

Is that because you would feel uncomfortable? Or because you think you shouldn't?"

On the 'spot' double question ... lol

Meets; the conversations are usually a laugh etc and this is sometimes a laughing point for some.

I'm not bothered by being watched and is common in many play situations.

Think most would agree if he is a voyeur you see him at times during play but eye contact is avoided.

At times I've perhaps felt he has tried to see if I can be intimidated by it.

May be I'm just 'focused'

But a straight forward answer is yes to both questions in general but we're not all 'general' people.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

I think if you feel intimated by any meet, then maybe it isn't the right meet for you.

My OH is offering myself up to men to enjoy themselves with me, there is no way we would want a person to feel intimidated by that or anything else.

It seems an odd thing to do for me TBH. You should all be comfortable.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We would walk away if Rob was blanked while we were out,can't say its ever happened though,even when we've been apart and chatting to other people its always been the case that each of us has been able to just come over and join in

On here its different as its only me thats chats anyway but if guys that want to meet forget I have a husband I get bored very quickly

You have a husband? lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think if you feel intimated by any meet, then maybe it isn't the right meet for you.

My OH is offering myself up to men to enjoy themselves with me, there is no way we would want a person to feel intimidated by that or anything else.

It seems an odd thing to do for me TBH. You should all be comfortable."

It's just wrong really.

To be more precise though the intended intimidation factor has been after a few meets with the same couple.

With the humour in conversations they're just having a bit of fun.

Not had a guy wink yet ! lol

Not an issue either just an observation

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By *habsMan
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

I swear it wasn't me!

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

On here its different as its only me thats chats anyway but if guys that want to meet forget I have a husband I get bored very quickly

You have a husband? lol"

No that was my bouncer

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On here its different as its only me thats chats anyway but if guys that want to meet forget I have a husband I get bored very quickly

You have a husband? lol

No that was my bouncer

More like a bear with his arm in the honeypot pmsl

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

On here its different as its only me thats chats anyway but if guys that want to meet forget I have a husband I get bored very quickly

You have a husband? lol

No that was my bouncer

More like a bear with his arm in the honeypot pmsl"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I swear it wasn't me!"

I can 'swear' at times lol.

Depends though on situation - thought I had seen you about just in case you think I'm eyeing you up lol.

I haven't

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why do some people think that its ok to chat to the lady in a couple but then deliberately blank the male partner?

This is something we have noticed, and find extremely annoying. We give three opportunities then blank them for being rude. What do other couples think of this and how do you handle it. "

Anything to do with the fact when the profile is for a couple almost all the pics are of the female and not the male?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have found this too and it is really rude.

In our case it is my OH who mainly talks to guys to set up meetings. If its guys from the forum who message and I like them, then he tends to leave that chatting to me, because as he doesnt post on the forums, it would be my persona that they have become attracted to.

But mostly my OH will chat in msn or on here with guys and they form a male rapport. The guys tend to ask him what I like, how to pleasure me etc, and I find that really cute actually. One guy was so nervous about meeting me that he phoned my OH to say how nervous he was feeling. Also because my OH tends to arrange scenarios for me, he is the one speaking and arranging with the other guys.

My OH works away quite a lot and I have had men ask to meet and when Ive explained hes away, they have said come on your own then. I dont like that. Its just really disrespectful.

I have also had messages from guys asking to meet alone from the first message. As my OH is the one who tends to see most of the messages, unless im on the forum and of course logged on, then its not really a bright idea to ask to meet me alone is it. He messaged one guy back to say yes ok, and the guy was up for meeting within the hour and said the place etc. It was only when he said, what if hubby finds out, that my OH said, it is Chris, dont worry Feebs wont find out about us. The guy blocked us.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

It's good to see that this has struck a cord with people. We didn't raise it to in order to castigate one group as against another but to increase awareness and see if it was a general problem.

A few mention that perhaps we could use seperate Avatar's - realistically we would say that perhaps people could actually read the profiles provided or what we type. We will either say who is there such 'Ed, D or both here' or the type colour will alter from a shade of blue to one of red to indicate sex.

We really don't think we can be clearer than that, we shouldn't have to cam to prove who we are most singles don't. Rudeness gets you blocked, we are a couple, we do not cheat!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I swear it wasn't me!"

I don't think you are capable of being ignorant.... even if you tried

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well i will chat to you both hehe xxxxx

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By *rummiePartyManMan
over a year ago

birmingham

"It's not just single men that are guilty of this. Plenty of couples who struggle to find the elusive bi-fem see to see a couple as the answer."

What it basically shows is what a "disposable commodity" men are on the swinging scene. Men are likely to get blanked whether they are on their own or even if they are "couple'd". It just seems to be the way.

I'm not justifying the action, simply making an observation. As has been said, it's not just single men who are rude in this respect. Women and couples are equally to blame, but when the couples and women turn the men into the victims, you don't get to hear about it as they are supposed to be stiff upper lipped, broad shouldered, and able to "get over it" and "move on" etc.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Well i will chat to you both hehe xxxxx

You are welcome anytime and you know it xxx

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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago

near kings lynn

I go to clubs and probably get more excited about chatting with the female rather than the male.

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By *adja_lazloCouple
over a year ago

Solihull

"Why do some people think that its ok to chat to the lady in a couple but then deliberately blank the male partner?

This is something we have noticed, and find extremely annoying. We give three opportunities then blank them for being rude. What do other couples think of this and how do you handle it. "

yip we just block, if the guys cant/wont chat in rooms or msn, it will be a quiet meet lol

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

I am probably more guilty of doing in the other way round.... but to be honest i'll gas with anyone, be that male or female...

what I will say those is this... if I am playing with a couple then I will talk to the couple and not just one...

everyone is getting something out of it.. so i see it as disrespectful if I would only speak to one.....

anyway people say I talk too much anyway... completely different thread methinks...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I go to clubs and probably get more excited about chatting with the female rather than the male."

Thats acceptable as they are both there in a social context, and in order to take it further you wouldn't snub the partner deliberately, would you? We are talking about messaging.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can understand the avatar and pics thing though. Well from a forum point of view. It is always me, Feebs, on the forums, so if people message me from here, they sometimes will forget that I am not the only one who will be reading the message.

If its forum related or if it is clear that the message is from someone who frequents the forums, then those messages get left for me to deal with and I think its fair enough that people only address me in this regard, because its my view they are commenting on etc. But if its to express an interest to meet,it should be addressed to the two of us.

I think its a good thing that the men get on and form a bond. After all if a guy cant talk to the partner of a couple, how is he gonna feel when the two of them are naked, cocks a swinging, and in close proximity to each other

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is probably one of the more positive threads if people keep it positive.

Although single guys can be ignorant or rude and the numbers game is high.

The couples (this is not being rude btw) can put a very basic profile on display and will get lots of messages which very few are appealing.

So it would be positive to say I think and hope the majority agree ??

If couples said more about both people it would give people more to talk about and reduce a few rants and lots of messages that don't appeal.

Couples profiles that are descriptive can be of a 'rant' style and I can see why too at times - there are some very good profiles too though from couples !!

It's easy to think they don't need too as is it's easy to rant - people do like to have a good moan in most aspects of life.

Hopefully this could reduce a few other rants people have.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"This is probably one of the more positive threads if people keep it positive.

Although single guys can be ignorant or rude and the numbers game is high.

The couples (this is not being rude btw) can put a very basic profile on display and will get lots of messages which very few are appealing.

So it would be positive to say I think and hope the majority agree ??

If couples said more about both people it would give people more to talk about and reduce a few rants and lots of messages that don't appeal.

Couples profiles that are descriptive can be of a 'rant' style and I can see why too at times - there are some very good profiles too though from couples !!

It's easy to think they don't need too as is it's easy to rant - people do like to have a good moan in most aspects of life.

Hopefully this could reduce a few other rants people have.

see.. this is where I bring it back down.... sorry in advance

part of the problem is single men.. in the fact that as you said they are prepared to put up with "less" to get the meets! maybe the question should be "why do single men let couples/women get away with it"...

if i don't find a profile attractive... or has the one line on it... I don't answer... but it seems as if lots of guys will in the search to get their leg over...

if they had the same exacting standards the other way round, then maybe some would learn.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The couples (this is not being rude btw) can put a very basic profile on display and will get lots of messages which very few are appealing.

So it would be positive to say I think and hope the majority agree ??

If couples said more about both people it would give people more to talk about and reduce a few rants and lots of messages that don't appeal."

Beceause we all know that single men always read the profile and only send unique messages...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why do some people think that its ok to chat to the lady in a couple but then deliberately blank the male partner?

This is something we have noticed, and find extremely annoying. We give three opportunities then blank them for being rude. What do other couples think of this and how do you handle it. "

We have experienced the same lots of times. WE FIND IT REALLY ANNOYING!

These guys have no chance!

Even if they seem to be ok at the beginning - after a few messages you can tell they are only after the female half...

Then it's a NO FROM US lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ya thinks ? xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is probably one of the more positive threads if people keep it positive.

Although single guys can be ignorant or rude and the numbers game is high.

The couples (this is not being rude btw) can put a very basic profile on display and will get lots of messages which very few are appealing.

So it would be positive to say I think and hope the majority agree ??

If couples said more about both people it would give people more to talk about and reduce a few rants and lots of messages that don't appeal.

Couples profiles that are descriptive can be of a 'rant' style and I can see why too at times - there are some very good profiles too though from couples !!

It's easy to think they don't need too as is it's easy to rant - people do like to have a good moan in most aspects of life.

Hopefully this could reduce a few other rants people have.

see.. this is where I bring it back down.... sorry in advance

if i don't find a profile attractive... or has the one line on it... I don't answer... but it seems as if lots of guys will in the search to get their leg over...

if they had the same exacting standards the other way round, then maybe some would learn....."

I'm tried to raise a similar point in another thread and I was made to feel like I had an issue. The majority of men here bend over backwards to try and get meets and it compromises their approach and what they're after from the site. I think both sides need to learn to meet halfway on certain things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Perhaps if couples had pictures of the male on their avatar as well, you know, as an aid memoir to the simple single guys instead of only the female displaying her wears, this wouldn't happen.

Just a thought!

I want to get meets not scare the buggers off with pics of him up

So glad he doesn't use forums bless

Then you've proved my point. Your avatar, you posting but on a couples profile, it's easy to see why anyone would address just you and not your partner.

Couples seem to expect single men to be mind readers.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep can see where your coming from Sassy and have to admit I am the first to moan when there is only pics of females on cpls profile there is pics of him on ours all be it not a face pic but do send 1 in private.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Perhaps if couples had pictures of the male on their avatar as well, you know, as an aid memoir to the simple single guys instead of only the female displaying her wears, this wouldn't happen.

Just a thought!

I want to get meets not scare the buggers off with pics of him up

So glad he doesn't use forums bless

Then you've proved my point. Your avatar, you posting but on a couples profile, it's easy to see why anyone would address just you and not your partner.

Couples seem to expect single men to be mind readers."

I too can see ya point on here

But as my earlier post said it actually happens at clubs when we are both there and thats just wrong xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Perhaps if couples had pictures of the male on their avatar as well, you know, as an aid memoir to the simple single guys instead of only the female displaying her wears, this wouldn't happen.

Just a thought!

I want to get meets not scare the buggers off with pics of him up

So glad he doesn't use forums bless

Then you've proved my point. Your avatar, you posting but on a couples profile, it's easy to see why anyone would address just you and not your partner.

Couples seem to expect single men to be mind readers."

I'm not sure what you mean when you say couples expect single men to be mind readers.... it does say on our profile that we are an MF couple! If the single guy choses to ignore that fact then he deserves to be greeted in return with ignorance.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

As regards profiles, a lot of these are simple one or two liners which tell us the person concerned was too lazy to think of someway of marketing themselves.

Photographs, avatars showing us both, these are tiny pictures. If you missed the fact that we are a couple on our profile how the hell are you going to notice we are a couple on an avatar.

Concerning single men, Ed was one, he had his own profile and chatted - he marketed himself and beat a lot of younger guys. He realised the numbers were against him!

The facts speak for themselves what is the ratio of single men to women or couples?

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By *r and mrs sanddancerCouple
over a year ago

BOLDON COLLIERY

the other night in the northern room

both me and my partner (scouse) were in chat and one guy kept comming on to her,

and naturaly we both replied some of the times and i was told to but out by him as he was talking to the fem

when we pointed out we were a couple he then blocked me

when my partner asked him why, his reply was he does not talk to guys and it had nothing to do with me as it was her he wanted a shag off

needless to say he was blocked by both of us from then on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Interesting we can all learn from here.

Some of the brief profiles may indicate what some suggest but behind them are really great fun,down to earth people who have busy lives.

Once they are happy a few messages and a call is more conversational than ping pong messages.

Not an ideal or perfect world we live in.

I keep an open mind - probably not done myself any favours with messaging.

None of us are perfect and some have lots of time and swinging is a big part of their life.

Thing I've noticed is those that are a bit defensive or weary perhaps (for their very understandable reasons) it's better to send one or two well thought out messages.

Some don't want loads and rather talk.

To me, messaging can be like leaving a message on an answerphone - where as when you speak the conversation flows.

The defences have mainly arisen from those that are 'risen' when calling though !!

So easy to assume too.

I've said enough on this subject now.

I've not intended to offend anyone or been offended.

It's a forum people will have their opinions and some will take notice - some won't.

Have fun though and get out what you put in is perhaps more concise.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Have an image of a todger typing on a keyboard now

could you post it so we can have a look?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

when i speak to couples in a club or forums or private messages i will speak to them both

its important i feel after all if you are looking to play with a couple the right impression matters

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By *hoenixcouplexxCouple
over a year ago

Leicestershire

If anyone. Another couple, a single guy or single girl. Don't want to talk to both of us then as we come as a couple together and this is something we would only ever consider doing together then they are not for us.

We have had plenty of girls only interested in talking to and meeting with Mrs P as well as couples and single guys.

As the male I do struggle to understand the males of other 'couples' that don't want to talk to me. As I will happily chat to the other guys. I want to get a feel for them anyway as if I don't click with you I am not trusting you with my Mrs!

Some seem to forget that.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

By PleaseandTease

Nr Peterborough

Interesting we can all learn from here.

Some of the brief profiles may indicate what some suggest but behind them are really great fun,down to earth people who have busy lives.

The problem with the above statement is that if you are to busy to do a semi decent profile then you are too busy to be in here or take interest in meets. 5 minutes thats all it takes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some seem to forget that."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" By PleaseandTease

Nr Peterborough

Interesting we can all learn from here.

Some of the brief profiles may indicate what some suggest but behind them are really great fun,down to earth people who have busy lives.

The problem with the above statement is that if you are to busy to do a semi decent profile then you are too busy to be in here or take interest in meets. 5 minutes thats all it takes.

if you put in what you want out surely it could be a few minutes that could really make it on here for you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Usually I get a wink as a first message, I take a look at the profile and then respond accordingly. However when 80% of the first messages I receive are about the size of my cock or complimenting me on my arse, I tend to assume it's the lady, unless talking to a bi-couple.

It kind of helps the person receiving the message if they have some inkling of who it is that is contacting them. In terms of clubs..... No opinion, no experience

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What? u get messages?

But ur a single male???

Quick, put a thread up in forum!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What? u get messages?

But ur a single male???

Quick, put a thread up in forum!!

Mad eh? Be terrible if I didn't, as I don't message first! Psychic Swinging - helping shy people get laid since 1994

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Find it in the chatrooms all the time, they will talk to me but not Mr Ldn. It is rude but we ignore them, if they cant get on with both of us they wont get on me lol

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By *habsMan
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

See how ignorant I am? I managed to ignore this thread for a whole day... grrrr!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we find it really rude when we get messages from single guys and they are always directed at the fem.

erm,,it is a cpls profile so message "both" of us xx

auds AND jas

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why do some couples automatically think you are only flirting with the female Hehe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

when they say,,,

hi auds nice tits

lol auds xx

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By *DSRMan
over a year ago

leicester

I find it harder to flirt with a guy than i do with a girl... I have a tendency to flirt with every female i ever meet, it's just the way i talk to females... it's flirty & can not be stopped (unless i close my eyes and wish really hard)

but talking to males, well.. i talk like geeza to geeza, it's who i am and it's how i have talked with men all my life

however, i would happily talk to a male and a female and want to get into the females panties (Shit i've been doing that welll before i knew what swinging was) & as for males joining in... well depends on the offer but i'm not Bi so gonna have to sign a contract and atleast get to the finals of the xfactor

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

its not really about talking to the bloke its about sending messages respecting its a cpl profile.

we do occasionally meet alone but if a guy sends us a message and its soley directed at me,,,im not interested sorry after all i am a married woman not a single fem

auds xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I sometimes send messages to the male half of a couple forgetting there is a female to be acknowledged

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By *ddiddyMan
over a year ago

kilkenny

"
ha ha i tried that one night and the guy said oh lovely when can we meet and try it lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I sometimes send messages to the male half of a couple forgetting there is a female to be acknowledged

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

ha ha i tried that one night and the guy said oh lovely when can we meet and try it lol"

And i would still love to!

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By *r and mrs sanddancerCouple
over a year ago

BOLDON COLLIERY

"Why do some couples automatically think you are only flirting with the female Hehe

when your told to butt out of the conversation

as he only wants to shag the fem

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why do some couples automatically think you are only flirting with the female Hehe

when your told to butt out of the conversation

as he only wants to shag the fem

Think someone has misunderstood the post!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

read da profile dats wat it there 4. Yes pig ignorant.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

read da profile dats wat it there 4. Yes pig ignorant.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

read da profile dats wat it there 4. Yes pig ignorant.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we have same problem even though it says on our profile to speak to us as a couple some just look at pics and never read the whole profile i read all the profile thats why it takes us so long to choose anyone to play with it is annoying but we never block any one and if i talk to someone i always let them know wich of us there talking to

kev (SPICE)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/11/11 00:44:29]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Perhaps if couples had pictures of the male on their avatar as well, you know, as an aid memoir to the simple single guys instead of only the female displaying her wears, this wouldn't happen.

Just a thought!

I want to get meets not scare the buggers off with pics of him up

So glad he doesn't use forums bless

Then you've proved my point. Your avatar, you posting but on a couples profile, it's easy to see why anyone would address just you and not your partner.

Couples seem to expect single men to be mind readers.

If a couple wanted to meet as a couple, then why would they be worried about a picture of the husband putting any potential meet off? Surely if this is the case, they simply aren't right for you, right?

In some profiles, the level of the husband's involvement is not clear. Just having a MF profile means nothing if the usage percentage (pictures, messages, time online, etc) is 70% one way and 30% the other way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was joking about putting people off with a pic of him up , as for our profile I am on it a lot more than him however i always tell people that message will not make any decisions until he has seen messages and could take time due to work commitments.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"read da profile dats wat it there 4. Yes pig ignorant."

Jeepers who was that rant at?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"read da profile dats wat it there 4. Yes pig ignorant.

Jeepers who was that rant at?

fook know i'm still flicking thro my chavs for dummies hand book to translate what it says

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"read da profile dats wat it there 4. Yes pig ignorant.

Jeepers who was that rant at?

fook know i'm still flicking thro my chavs for dummies hand book to translate what it says

Oooo send me the translation when you have it

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Perhaps if couples had pictures of the male on their avatar as well, you know, as an aid memoir to the simple single guys instead of only the female displaying her wears, this wouldn't happen.

Just a thought!

I want to get meets not scare the buggers off with pics of him up

So glad he doesn't use forums bless

Then you've proved my point. Your avatar, you posting but on a couples profile, it's easy to see why anyone would address just you and not your partner.

Couples seem to expect single men to be mind readers.

The latter comments beggar belief. I take that because you say you are single, it flows that you are a couple and every thing else on your profile is a fiction based on percentages.

Would you like a white stick and a guide dog to help you navigate your way round.

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By *r n mrs happy101Couple
over a year ago

telford,shropshire

we had one guy ask us to play in a club we went too..mention no names..he asked us to play, i said no thank you and was very polite...to find this single guy then turned and asked my hubby if he could "borrow his wife for an hour" how rude!! after i just told him we were not going to be playing with him!..

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By *r and mrs sanddancerCouple
over a year ago

BOLDON COLLIERY

"Why do some couples automatically think you are only flirting with the female Hehe

when your told to butt out of the conversation

as he only wants to shag the fem

Think someone has misunderstood the post!

no was commenting on how single guy totally dismissed the fact we are a cpl

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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

"Why do some people think that its ok to chat to the lady in a couple but then deliberately blank the male partner?

This is something we have noticed, and find extremely annoying. We give three opportunities then blank them for being rude. What do other couples think of this and how do you handle it. "

If we were out at a party/social and somebody ignored Mr (male/female or couple) then yes that would get my back up and put me right off.

Random emails that totally ignore Mr also put me off. Have turned down a few people because of this.

Emails to do with the forums I'd expect to be aimed just as me as I'm the one who uses them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"the other night in the northern room

both me and my partner (scouse) were in chat and one guy kept comming on to her,

and naturaly we both replied some of the times and i was told to but out by him as he was talking to the fem

when we pointed out we were a couple he then blocked me

when my partner asked him why, his reply was he does not talk to guys and it had nothing to do with me as it was her he wanted a shag off

needless to say he was blocked by both of us from then on "

Canna fault ya on that one xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

...... on the other hand, single females often get mail from just the male half of a couple.

I always reply back to both of them ...... not nice to get mail from a jealous female other half.

And it does happen.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Great topic. All profiles on here have pretty much all bases covered, preferences, demographics, choices. We have had winks and messages from people within and outside our stated preferences. Politeness, intelligence are always welcome, treat people as you would wish to be treated. The same applies in meets. We meet as a couple, we know what we are on here for. That said, it is so important that all parties get on in our opinion. Horses for courses, everyones different. However it works for us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Perhaps if couples had pictures of the male on their avatar as well, you know, as an aid memoir to the simple single guys instead of only the female displaying her wears, this wouldn't happen.

Just a thought!

I want to get meets not scare the buggers off with pics of him up

So glad he doesn't use forums bless

Then you've proved my point. Your avatar, you posting but on a couples profile, it's easy to see why anyone would address just you and not your partner.

Couples seem to expect single men to be mind readers.

The latter comments beggar belief. I take that because you say you are single, it flows that you are a couple and every thing else on your profile is a fiction based on percentages.

Would you like a white stick and a guide dog to help you navigate your way round.

Yeah, because it's never a couple's fault.

Plus, even now, the majority of replies from couples on this post have been from the female half. You say my comments beggar belief but I'm still talking with mostly wives andnot husbands. Just a note.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I will talk to anyone in the chatrooms me man woman the pet dog the parrot dont bother me at all so long as they interact and reply back for some banter tho its only the woman im interested in playing with tho. Not on cam in a chatroom tho its naff is that much prefer to meet in person.

To be fare tho in the short time I have been on here some deffo not all males on the mf profiles just sit there silent in the chatrooms on cam and let the wifes do all the talking anyhow but if you get passed all the dribble that goes up the screen so fast I need play back installed you can at times get some great banter and chat until someone spoils it and says hey such n such abody great tits suck his cock will ya n its like hmmmmm do you get many meets m8 do ya! lol besides how do they always no if she has great tits or not sometimes she wearing a big feckin wooly jumper haha

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By *arambarMan
over a year ago

swindon

[Removed by poster at 02/11/11 00:53:24]

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