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Vanilla friends

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Do any of you tell your vanilla friends about your swinging lifestyle, and if so, how do they react?

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

No. They wouldn’t approve. I’ve been part of conversations where the idea was mooted but was ground down with a chorus of judgemental howls of condemnation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A few. Several really weren’t keen and phrases like ‘selling yourself short’ were used. If you don’t like non-monogamous relationships and the idea of sex as a recreation then it’s hard to see the attraction.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

No. I only discuss my sex life with those involved in it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everyone knows I like milfs lol. Even my mum.

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By *evaquitCouple
over a year ago

Catthorpe

Not a chance!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh hell no

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All my friends know. But I'm really close with them all and have been friends with them for almost 6 years.

I only have 3 people I would class as friends and they are very close friends and not judgemental of my sex life at all.

~Mia

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By *appy squirrelWoman
over a year ago

Norwich

close friends know. they just shake their head and ask what I have been up to now...

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By *entleman JayMan
over a year ago

Wakefield

Not a single one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ive told my 2 very best friends . Showed one the site she said it was disgusting showed the other friend she signed up

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By *ynecplCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne


"No. They wouldn’t approve. I’ve been part of conversations where the idea was mooted but was ground down with a chorus of judgemental howls of condemnation. "

Same here when swinging has cropped up in conversation it has been with disgust.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not having to creep around the subject and lie to friends and family is a huge burden lifted. Our kids are fine with it and as long as we are happy... They're happy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My friends know. A few are from the scene and others not. They accept who I am and don’t judge anymore.

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By *oungalpha20Man
over a year ago

North West /Cumbria

A few of my friends know I go to clubs etc. They don't really understand it so they don't really judge.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have no friends but couldn't hide it any longer from my 245 cats. They needed to knoww hat I am up to when I leave them on their own!

They weren't happy about it ! They shat on my bed !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No.

I don't think they'd approve to be honest.

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By *exysurferMan
over a year ago

Bromley

Only a handful do.

They don’t judge me to be fair. If anything they ask lots of questions about what goes on but don’t have the balls to come with me and see for themselves.

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By *arlingCoupleCouple
over a year ago

fareham

My wife told a close work friend. Now they are fuck buddies.

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By *oodnitegirlWoman
over a year ago

Yorkshire

Yes. The vast majority of people.

Drew a line at my mam tho... but I don’t think she’d be that fussed

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

No they don't and on the occasions It's been touched on in conversation it's always been in a nudge nudge wink wink snigger snigger way - that said if I told them (which I never would) they probably wouldn't think any the worse of me and would probably be more interested in how it works etc than anything

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By *oodnitegirlWoman
over a year ago

Yorkshire


"No they don't and on the occasions It's been touched on in conversation it's always been in a nudge nudge wink wink snigger snigger way - that said if I told them (which I never would) they probably wouldn't think any the worse of me and would probably be more interested in how it works etc than anything"

There was a conversation cropped up at work about a bloke that had been in. Terrible (spinal) accident and his wife went off elsewhere (with his permission) and a whole ‘what would you think’ debate. I was dying to say ‘it’s just a normal Saturday night for me is that, love’. Lol

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"No they don't and on the occasions It's been touched on in conversation it's always been in a nudge nudge wink wink snigger snigger way - that said if I told them (which I never would) they probably wouldn't think any the worse of me and would probably be more interested in how it works etc than anything

There was a conversation cropped up at work about a bloke that had been in. Terrible (spinal) accident and his wife went off elsewhere (with his permission) and a whole ‘what would you think’ debate. I was dying to say ‘it’s just a normal Saturday night for me is that, love’. Lol"

Yep that was pretty much what went through my head when it cropped up in conversation with my mates - just sat there and smiled wryly thinking "if only you knew"

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By *ex LutherMan
over a year ago

Closer than you think

At my last job they used to joke I was a swinger I played along until one day I just thought sod it and fully admitted it all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Heavens no

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By *oungalpha20Man
over a year ago

North West /Cumbria

Shouldn't hide the fact that people swing. Open and honest. Their gonna be bothered or not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 21/04/18 09:31:00]

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By *harma and GregCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

I Dharma told my best friend about it and she and her hubby had a dable but decided it wasnt for them they have never judged us. I wouldnt tell people im not very close to.

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By *pocalypse10Couple
over a year ago

coventry

At one of our closest couple friends BBQ last summer it came up in a game of 'have you ever'. After showing their admiration for what we do and their curiosity getting the better of them it ended up with all four of us spending a very sexy night together (First time for them). Turned out they weren't so Vanilla after all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My wife told a close work friend. Now they are fuck buddies."

Very nice

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor


"I have no friends but couldn't hide it any longer from my 245 cats. They needed to knoww hat I am up to when I leave them on their own!

They weren't happy about it ! They shat on my bed !"

Naughty pussies.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

They know im no angel. The only person interested in my sex life is my goddaughter as she thinks she can shock me. Was funny when we where all in the beer garden including my friends 80 year old mother when my goddaughter informed me there was a new swingers club opening if i wanted to go

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By *urvygirl75Woman
over a year ago

chester

My best friends know and although it’s not for them they kinda get it!

Plus one of my ‘mummy’ friends is also on here (found out by accident chatting during a late night drinking sesh at hers & swinging popped into the convo!) and we’ve had many an incredible session with our lovers and others! it’s useful to have someone who understands this world as ‘backup’ when going on meets

S

Xx

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By *oodnitegirlWoman
over a year ago

Yorkshire


" it’s useful to have someone who understands this world as ‘backup’ when going on meets

Xx"

This!!

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By *urvygirl75Woman
over a year ago

chester


" it’s useful to have someone who understands this world as ‘backup’ when going on meets

Xx

This!! "

Thanks! wouldn’t have had half the great meets I have without her there if I needed her! x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Most of my friends and colleagues know or have guessed. My sisters think they know but have never actually asked, I'd tell them if they did! We're not fussed really, after all we're having fun with like minded consensual adults and as long as it doesn't affect anyone else it's all good!

Peach x

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By *inkySeeKinkyDoWoman
over a year ago

'tween PontyCarlo & CasVegas in West Yorks

Yes all of them...and some work colleagues.

Im not ashamed and i dont give a fuck if people judge me for it, thats their problem not mine. All are accepting and very excited to hear my layest swinging stories.

My grown up daughters both kind of know by accident but i dont discuss it with them, and i wouldnt tell my siblings or dad, i dont think theyd accept it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No. They wouldn’t approve. I’ve been part of conversations where the idea was mooted but was ground down with a chorus of judgemental howls of condemnation. "

Exact same with me. I brought up the subject casually in the car once with my best friend and her SO & they basically stated it was 'disgusting' and 'wrong' etc and that was that, I didn't say anymore! In fact, I sorta find my vanilla friends now sorta boring...

- H

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

My daughter & a few of my closest friends now.

I'm sure a lot have suspicions, as they often make jokes about it.

I've been a 'naturist' all my life, I just say I'm off to the spa when talking about places I go.

If they ever asked me directly, then I'd give them an honest answer.

Think they'd be more embarrassed than me

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows

[Removed by poster at 21/04/18 10:02:13]

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"No. They wouldn’t approve. I’ve been part of conversations where the idea was mooted but was ground down with a chorus of judgemental howls of condemnation.

Exact same with me. I brought up the subject casually in the car once with my best friend and her SO & they basically stated it was 'disgusting' and 'wrong' etc and that was that, I didn't say anymore! In fact, I sorta find my vanilla friends now sorta boring...

- H "

Wonder how many of those friends that find it "disgusting" and "wrong" are actually using it as a deflection technique as they think that's what you're expecting them to say but would actually be interested and just won't admit it openly for fear of being judged, or because they think their SO wouldn't approve.

Just an idle musing but wouldn't surprise me if it's the case in some instances.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Friends an family know I’m kinky. My daughter found Fab in my open tabs while we was at dinner with some friends of mine she handled it better than friends, just asked a few questions an that was that.

Every now an then I will say I’ve done such an such to vanilla an it doesn’t go down well. Even discovered I had a homophobic friend. We arnt friends any more. I just chat to people on the scene, less judgment

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No. They wouldn’t approve. I’ve been part of conversations where the idea was mooted but was ground down with a chorus of judgemental howls of condemnation.

Exact same with me. I brought up the subject casually in the car once with my best friend and her SO & they basically stated it was 'disgusting' and 'wrong' etc and that was that, I didn't say anymore! In fact, I sorta find my vanilla friends now sorta boring...

- H

Wonder how many of those friends that find it "disgusting" and "wrong" are actually using it as a deflection technique as they think that's what you're expecting them to say but would actually be interested and just won't admit it openly for fear of being judged, or because they think their SO wouldn't approve.

Just an idle musing but wouldn't surprise me if it's the case in some instances."

I also wonder that! They're pretty 'conservative' so I do wonder if it's a deflection... If I mentioned it to them that we swung I bet they'd have a different opinion and a lot of questions haha

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By *xkinkycouplexxCouple
over a year ago

Haywards Heath

only a few of our friends know and a couple of there are no longer vanilla friends no more and one we are no longer friends with but dont bother us, my (Saphire) mum and partner have heard from somewhere but we havent admitted or denied it but just avoided it and carry on the convo else where but no one else, they would be mortified haha but dont bother us if they did though x

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By *vetteBondTV/TS
over a year ago

English Riviera

My private life is just that, private.

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By *ilthyStrumpetCouple
over a year ago

Trowbridge

They all know, none of them care, none were surprised

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Agreed with the above, sex life is between me and those involved, just like my private/ personal life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I couple of my friends know but they don’t ask me about it.

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By *eakcoupleCouple
over a year ago

peak district

We have told a couple of friends and some relations. One friend was very interested, wanted to know all about it but said she hadn't got the confidence to try. We offered to take her to club singles night, she liked the idea of all the men but not of fucking with other people watching. The others think that's our choice and are not judgmental.

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By *an_WoodMan
over a year ago

Stafford

Never

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

..


"sex life is between me and those involved, just like my private/ personal life."

^^This

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