FabSwingers.com forum: Would you get back with your partner if they cheated

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

My friend just took back his girlfriend of 1 year: after finding out she fucked 2 other guys behind his back,,,, what would you do.

I’ve advised it’s a bad idea and will always be on your mind, but he doesn’t want to listen

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes I would do if I loved them enough XXX

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By *iSTARessWoman
over a year ago

London

Nope.

But then again, I don't think I could do monogamy again. All out in the open, no probs. Cheat? In the bin

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm guessing he's around your age. Far too young for all that drama. Hope you told him to tell her to fuck off x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have done in the past

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope. Once a cheat always a cheat in my opinion x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends on circumstances

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope. We’re in an open marriage, but my husband has no desire to meet anyone. If he did, and didn’t tell me, I’d be gone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm guessing he's around your age. Far too young for all that drama. Hope you told him to tell her to fuck off x"

They are both 27, I don’t want to be the bad guy lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I forgived my ex boyfriend for so many things but the instant he cheated it was over as I ended it.

There's no going back after someone cheats and if you do forgive them you may aswell hand them a free ticket to do it again and treat you like a mug.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lots of people want to stay with one partner but also want sex with others. If they dont think their partner is receptive they may cheat. Its a good opportunity to suggest the swinging lifestyle, if your friend is up for that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No second chances

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

It would entirely depend on the circumstances.

If said partner was willing to be completely honest about why they did it, was happy to talk it through and we could identify what went wrong (it's rarely just one partner responsible). Then if we were both willing to move forward with the intention of being 100% honest in future I would consider it with the proviso that it never happened again.

At the end of a long term relationship in which both people love each other some things are less significant when viewed from a distance. No point throwing the baby out with the bath water.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I'm guessing he's around your age. Far too young for all that drama. Hope you told him to tell her to fuck off x

They are both 27, I don’t want to be the bad guy lol"

Their relationship is their business.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Ok clearer pic of the situation.

He found out about the cheating that happened like 6 month ago with one guy,

Then he left the house for a week “broke up” and after the second day of them “breaking up”she fucked another guy, but said she done it to try forget about him. Now 2weeks later they are back together.

But I still consider her fucking two guys.

I’m exauste just thinking about it lol

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Ok clearer pic of the situation.

He found out about the cheating that happened like 6 month ago with one guy,

But I still consider her fucking two guys.

I’m exauste just thinking about it lol "

Not your circus, not your monkeys.

Nobody ever knows the truth about another person's relationship.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It would entirely depend on the circumstances.

At the end of a long term relationship in which both people love each other some things are less significant when viewed from a distance. No point throwing the baby out with the bath water."

I agree with this. I think the worst part about infidelity is the deceit....*if* you can sort out the communication issues then I think it's possible to move on from, but not easy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok clearer pic of the situation.

He found out about the cheating that happened like 6 month ago with one guy,

But I still consider her fucking two guys.

I’m exauste just thinking about it lol "

She clearly wants more cock. Swinging or open relationship is only viable solution in my opinion.

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

From my own experience top and bottom of it is this.

If you split for whatever reason, and then get back together without resolving the reason that you split in the first place (be that cheating, gambling,being a Barry Manilow fan)then its pretty much guaranteed to raise its ugly head again in the future.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"It would entirely depend on the circumstances.

At the end of a long term relationship in which both people love each other some things are less significant when viewed from a distance. No point throwing the baby out with the bath water.

I agree with this. I think the worst part about infidelity is the deceit....*if* you can sort out the communication issues then I think it's possible to move on from, but not easy. "

Yes. I've never been in this position but if a couple stop communicating bad stuff happens. The trouble with communication is that sometimes you hear or say difficult things so people tend to avoid it and take a slightly easier path. A good relationship is worth trying mend in my opinion.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It would depend entirely on the situation and the circumstances at the time that the cheating happened, and also what had been discussed before and afterwards.

All you can do OP is support your friend in his decision. It may work out for him it may not, but no one else truly knows what goes on between 2 people. He may be telling you only his side of the story and we are not here to judge

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"From my own experience top and bottom of it is this.

I agree with that but being a Barry Manilow fan would be a step too far for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm guessing he's around your age. Far too young for all that drama. Hope you told him to tell her to fuck off x

They are both 27, I don’t want to be the bad guy lol"

You'd be the bad guy after 1 mistake. Fucking 2 guys. Get that skank to fuck x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes why not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The amount of couples profiles I've seen with NO CHEATS on there profile.Then you get a message off the man of the couples profile begging for sex but asking you not to verify them as they don't want there wife knowing is staggering.

Never would I sleep with a cheat no matter how you justify your cheating and never would I cheat.

It's a hurtful mug that cheats.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The amount of couples profiles I've seen with NO CHEATS on there profile.Then you get a message off the man of the couples profile begging for sex but asking you not to verify them as they don't want there wife knowing is staggering.

Never would I sleep with a cheat no matter how you justify your cheating and never would I cheat.

It's a hurtful mug that cheats."

How many times us that happened x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I feel like I should say no way. But until you're in that scenario it's difficult to say. It depends on the circumstances, where ye are in your relationship and whether or not he's able to talk about it openly after.

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By *he girl with dreadlocksWoman
over a year ago

need to know basis in Wolverhampton

There is no situation for me to forgive someone cheating on me, to me that show just how little respect he had for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nah.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never would I sleep with a cheat no matter how you justify your cheating and never would I cheat.

It's a hurtful mug that cheats."

This happens quite often. Some men on here are lucky enough to have a wife that is swinging with them, yet they still want to cheat. I don't get it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never would I sleep with a cheat no matter how you justify your cheating and never would I cheat.

It's a hurtful mug that cheats.

This happens quite often. Some men on here are lucky enough to have a wife that is swinging with them, yet they still want to cheat. I don't get it."

That is weird, and highly risky too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never would I sleep with a cheat no matter how you justify your cheating and never would I cheat.

It's a hurtful mug that cheats.

This happens quite often. Some men on here are lucky enough to have a wife that is swinging with them, yet they still want to cheat. I don't get it.

That is weird, and highly risky too."

That's the thrill of it to some people, some get off on the risk factor.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Only if im tagged in

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By *edoriartyCouple
over a year ago

Peterborough

I know couples that have survived cheating and I think it very much depends on the circumstances. Not sure I could take someone who cheated back very easily. Once the trust has gone the relationship changes

Red

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I took my husband back a long time ago.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Never would I sleep with a cheat no matter how you justify your cheating and never would I cheat.

It's a hurtful mug that cheats.

This happens quite often. Some men on here are lucky enough to have a wife that is swinging with them, yet they still want to cheat. I don't get it."

Some people (men and women) are never content with what's under their nose. They're so busy looking at what else they could have they fail to notice what they've got.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I took my husband back a long time ago. "

Who would cheat on you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I couldn't but can understand why some people would. If you still genuinely love someone, have kids or a long history together then it's a brave person that can just walk away.

I know I'd end up making both our lives a misery though, never trusting him when he was out. You'd drive yourself mad.

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By *ackDMissMorganCouple
over a year ago

Halifax

Nope,for me it would be over

If there was a problem I'd expect us to try and sort it out between us.

Once the trust has gone for me,that's it.

Miss

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nope.

But then again, I don't think I could do monogamy again. All out in the open, no probs. Cheat? In the bin"

This is where i am at

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By *uteLittleGeekWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere

Never would I sleep with a cheat no matter how you justify your cheating and never would I cheat.

It's a hurtful mug that cheats.

This happens quite often. Some men on here are lucky enough to have a wife that is swinging with them, yet they still want to cheat. I don't get it.

Some people (men and women) are never content with what's under their nose. They're so busy looking at what else they could have they fail to notice what they've got."

I call those people Hunters .

They hunt always thinking there is a better catch .

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By *lackXealMan
over a year ago

Middlesbrough

"It would entirely depend on the circumstances.

At the end of a long term relationship in which both people love each other some things are less significant when viewed from a distance. No point throwing the baby out with the bath water."

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Never would I sleep with a cheat no matter how you justify your cheating and never would I cheat.

It's a hurtful mug that cheats.

This happens quite often. Some men on here are lucky enough to have a wife that is swinging with them, yet they still want to cheat. I don't get it.

Some people (men and women) are never content with what's under their nose. They're so busy looking at what else they could have they fail to notice what they've got.

I call those people Hunters .

They hunt always thinking there is a better catch .

Yeah. They're usually like it in other aspects too. They've got a nice house and all the trappings but always want what someone else has. Never happy some people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I forgived my ex boyfriend for so many things but the instant he cheated it was over as I ended it.

There's no going back after someone cheats and if you do forgive them you may aswell hand them a free ticket to do it again and treat you like a mug."

Spot on

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By *mokes n MirrorsCouple
over a year ago

Plymouth and Newcastle (sometimes)

It can and does work out. The story is too long for here (might put it in story section one day) but I (LB) didn't know we had an account on here. When I did find out and P fessed up she found out I was a teeny tiny bit more perverted than she thought I was. 13 years together and nearly 6 on here shows what you can do if you want the same things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never an ok circumstance to cheat it's the lowest of the low if your not happy then break up go own way then you can do whatever you want with whoever etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have both taken a cheat back. It wasn’t a good move and would never do it again! It’s the nagging doubt in your head afterwards that eats you up. Even if they never ever do it again there would always be something in the back of your head questioning whether they had

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tell them to fuck off and not contact me again. Ever.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

We have an open relationship: he can fuck who he likes, just not in my house.

If he did he'd be out!

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

Not a chance in hell .

Once a cheat , always a cheat .

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By *ream3.14159Man
over a year ago

Here & there

If someone cheats in a relationship then that means there is something not right in that relationship, it's not as simple as the fault of one party.

A true loving relationship should be open in all aspects and cheating is a betrayal to that, people react differently to that fact, some are willing to discuss and find out what has gone wrong, others can't bear the fact of that betrayal and won't be able to deal with it, but once the deed has been done there is no way to take it back, it can be fixed like a broken vase but the cracks will always be there, it's up to the individuals whether they can live with broken vase because it could mean a lot for them or just can't tolerate those cracks.

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By *eejay2015Woman
over a year ago

somewhere in Buckinghamshire

I took mine back 3 times. Never again though, no matter that I loved him with all my being.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if someone is able to cheat in a relationship then they see something in the person they cheat with or do something with them that they are not able to with whoever they are in a relationship with key is be open to each other and if its not for you cut the strings move on don't let one party be more involved and get hurt than the other

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"If someone cheats in a relationship then that means there is something not right in that relationship, it's not as simple as the fault of one party.

Sometimes a repaired vase is stronger.

I think it depends on the stage you're at in a relationship. If I'd been with someone for say six months I'd just walk away but 25 or 30 years would be a different story.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

sorry no way.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I took my husband back a long time ago.

Who would cheat on you "

Him obviously

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Once trust has gone then so has the relationship so no its best to move on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 08/04/18 21:35:35]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wouldn’t break up with him for cheating. Cheating has never really been a deal breaker for me. As long as my position is not effected. I rather know though.

Mrs

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By *r and Mrs P SandCouple
over a year ago

South West

I couldn't do it...even If I tried to forgive or made the effort to, I don't think I could ever get past it.

Just the thought of it makes me feel physically ill.

Cheating isn't always just physical either...its emotional side,the secrecy and the lying. Nah, I'd chop his balls off

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"I wouldn’t break up with him for cheating. Cheating has never really been a deal breaker for me. As long as my position is not effected. I rather know though.

Mrs"

How would your position not be affected if he chose to cheat on you ?

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By *ykmwyldTV/TS
over a year ago

Belpre

Absolutely not, your only asking for more heartache if you do. If the trust is gone, it's offer, so don't fool yourself into thing otherwise.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I wouldn’t break up with him for cheating. Cheating has never really been a deal breaker for me. As long as my position is not effected. I rather know though.

Mrs

How would your position not be affected if he chose to cheat on you ? "

Well I might be affected. I mean if I’m at risk of losing him to someone else, then I would be effected. Or if he no longer has time to spend with with me and do the things we like to do. But otherwise I don’t think it would make much difference. When we used to live in a Scotland but he used to work during the week in a London, I used to wonder if he would find a sexual diversion (we didn’t swing back then). It never worried me if he might have cheated (he didn’t) because he always came back to me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No. But then I would never be in a monogamous relationship.

~Mia

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I wouldn’t break up with him for cheating. Cheating has never really been a deal breaker for me. As long as my position is not effected. I rather know though.

Mrs

How would your position not be affected if he chose to cheat on you ?

That's why I would never tell someone if I thought their partner was having sex elsewhere. They might have your dynamic.

That isn't a criticism of you in any way, I think it's good to consider your relationship as a whole rather than separate parts.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never would I sleep with a cheat no matter how you justify your cheating and never would I cheat.

It's a hurtful mug that cheats.

This happens quite often. Some men on here are lucky enough to have a wife that is swinging with them, yet they still want to cheat. I don't get it.

Some people (men and women) are never content with what's under their nose. They're so busy looking at what else they could have they fail to notice what they've got.

I call those people Hunters .

They hunt always thinking there is a better catch .

Yeah. They're usually like it in other aspects too. They've got a nice house and all the trappings but always want what someone else has. Never happy some people."

It happens a lot.Heres a example.ive been off here for 5 hours now and just logged on and looked through my messages.32 and 6 of those were the man if a couple profile asking for sex but not to be verified if we did meet as they don't want there wife finding out.

No chance I don't even reply it's just instantly deleted so it's pointless sending me messages like that as I would never do it as I don't agree with cheats.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Never would I sleep with a cheat no matter how you justify your cheating and never would I cheat.

It's a hurtful mug that cheats.

This happens quite often. Some men on here are lucky enough to have a wife that is swinging with them, yet they still want to cheat. I don't get it.

Some people (men and women) are never content with what's under their nose. They're so busy looking at what else they could have they fail to notice what they've got.

I call those people Hunters .

They hunt always thinking there is a better catch .

Yeah. They're usually like it in other aspects too. They've got a nice house and all the trappings but always want what someone else has. Never happy some people.

No chance I don't even reply it's just instantly deleted so it's pointless sending me messages like that as I would never do it as I don't agree with cheats. "

I can truly say that I've never been asked to meet alone or had the guy of a couple ask to meet me.

I know it happens because women often talk about it.

I know from real life too that there are so many people who just want what they don't have, even when what they have is good. It's a funny old world.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

open relationship can solve a lot of problems and they can tell you about it after

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My friend just took back his girlfriend of 1 year: after finding out she fucked 2 other guys behind his back,,,, what would you do.

I’ve advised it’s a bad idea and will always be on your mind, but he doesn’t want to listen "
hell no one strike and out! The thought is always going to be there once they have done it,are they going to do it again and the trust is broken.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I wouldn’t break up with him for cheating. Cheating has never really been a deal breaker for me. As long as my position is not effected. I rather know though.

Mrs

How would your position not be affected if he chose to cheat on you ?

Wasn’t so much our dynamic back then. I did expect a monogamous marriage in those days. But I guess I have always had a different perspective on the issue of cheating. I probably have the ability to say to myself ‘is my husband giving me a good life’. If the answer is yes, then I don’t see the point in spending to much time worrying about something that may have happened when they wasn’t there and doesn’t impact our life together. If that cheating is however infiltrating into our life then that’s a different matter. I see men who treat their partners like shite, but they don’t cheat. I think there are worse things a person can do than have a casual indiscretion.

Mrs

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By *ichaelangelaCouple
over a year ago

notts

"Nope. Once a cheat always a cheat in my opinion x"

so thinking about this comment, on the basis of once a cheat always a cheat, what if someone who is married has an affair with another married person who both leave their partners to be together, do you trust them and do they trust you??? after all, both have cheated

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By *he girl with dreadlocksWoman
over a year ago

need to know basis in Wolverhampton

"Nope. Once a cheat always a cheat in my opinion x

It wouldn't surprise me if one or both did the dirty again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've always thought I could forgive a one night stand where it's just sex but wouldn't be able to forgive an affair. But I've got a lot more vested in my relationship having children and been together for 19? Years. In a new relationship I don't think I'd give them a second chance.

Ginger

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I've always thought I could forgive a one night stand where it's just sex but wouldn't be able to forgive an affair. But I've got a lot more vested in my relationship having children and been together for 19? Years. In a new relationship I don't think I'd give them a second chance.

Ginger "

I agree with that. If someone cheats in a new relationship it would indicate to me that it was habitual rather than a symptom of something wrong in the relationship and they'd be out the door sooner than you could say extra curricula.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The glue of every relationship is the trust between them. When a relationship begins it's superglue, but once pulled apart some adhesive values remain but the strength is never the same. Some people learn a lesson though and find a way of resealing with fresh, new superglue, and the bond becomes stronger than ever and is never foolishly broken again

D x

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By *khot1Couple
over a year ago

somewhere over the rainbow

"I wouldn’t break up with him for cheating. Cheating has never really been a deal breaker for me. As long as my position is not effected. I rather know though.

Mrs

How would your position not be affected if he chose to cheat on you ?

Mrs"

Sounds as though you've cheated on him and your trying to justify it lol

I don't know how anyone can be OK with cheating I mean I have even seen threads on here where men are saying how erotic it is to find/think your partner has cheated

I'd be out the door in a shot x

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I wouldn’t break up with him for cheating. Cheating has never really been a deal breaker for me. As long as my position is not effected. I rather know though.

Mrs

How would your position not be affected if he chose to cheat on you ?

Mrs

Sounds as though you've cheated on him and your trying to justify it lol

I don't know how anyone can be OK with cheating I mean I have even seen threads on here where men are saying how erotic it is to find/think your partner has cheated

I'd be out the door in a shot x"

It doesn't sound like that at all, she has clearly explained the way she thinks in several posts. Neither her nor her husband cheated.

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By *khot1Couple
over a year ago

somewhere over the rainbow

"I wouldn’t break up with him for cheating. Cheating has never really been a deal breaker for me. As long as my position is not effected. I rather know though.

Mrs

How would your position not be affected if he chose to cheat on you ?

Mrs

Sounds as though you've cheated on him and your trying to justify it lol

I don't know how anyone can be OK with cheating I mean I have even seen threads on here where men are saying how erotic it is to find/think your partner has cheated

I'd be out the door in a shot x

It doesn't sound like that at all, she has clearly explained the way she thinks in several posts. Neither her nor her husband cheated."

Did I say she had?.. I said it sounds like it... Bit of a difference

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I wouldn’t break up with him for cheating. Cheating has never really been a deal breaker for me. As long as my position is not effected. I rather know though.

Mrs

How would your position not be affected if he chose to cheat on you ?

Mrs

Sounds as though you've cheated on him and your trying to justify it lol

I don't know how anyone can be OK with cheating I mean I have even seen threads on here where men are saying how erotic it is to find/think your partner has cheated

I'd be out the door in a shot x"

Me? No I’ve never cheated on him! We were monogamous until we started swinging

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By *khot1Couple
over a year ago

somewhere over the rainbow

"I wouldn’t break up with him for cheating. Cheating has never really been a deal breaker for me. As long as my position is not effected. I rather know though.

Mrs

How would your position not be affected if he chose to cheat on you ?

Mrs

Sounds as though you've cheated on him and your trying to justify it lol

I don't know how anyone can be OK with cheating I mean I have even seen threads on here where men are saying how erotic it is to find/think your partner has cheated

I'd be out the door in a shot x

Me? No I’ve never cheated on him! We were monogamous until we started swinging"

Good to know

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do realise I’m incredibly lucky to have a husband who allows me to sleep with other men. I never cheated but I have always battled temptation, and I have now come to the conclusion that monogamy is unnatural to me. So I have every sympathy for people who are wired up like me and also have to battle those same temptations in a monogamous relationship. I’m also very lucky that I have no issues with my husband sleeping with other women, although I’d prefer to know.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not a chance in hell .

Once a cheat , always a cheat .

I cheated 27 years ago so does that really apply to all? I was young and stupid but I’m very different now.

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro

"Nope. Once a cheat always a cheat in my opinion x"

This

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I do realise I’m incredibly lucky to have a husband who allows me to sleep with other men. I never cheated but I have always battled temptation, and I have now come to the conclusion that monogamy is unnatural to me. So I have every sympathy for people who are wired up like me and also have to battle those same temptations in a monogamous relationship. I’m also very lucky that I have no issues with my husband sleeping with other women, although I’d prefer to know.

Mrs"

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By *arciocialWoman
over a year ago

Leicester

No and I didn't. I've also ended a relationship when I wanted to cheat. Just proved to me that I was no longer interested in them so was best to end it and it was te best thing I done.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Not a chance in hell .

Once a cheat , always a cheat .

I cheated 27 years ago so does that really apply to all? I was young and stupid but I’m very different now. "

I think it's a blanket generalisation that doesn't take other factors in to account.

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By *mokes n MirrorsCouple
over a year ago

Plymouth and Newcastle (sometimes)

"The glue of every relationship is the trust between them. When a relationship begins it's superglue, but once pulled apart some adhesive values remain but the strength is never the same. Some people learn a lesson though and find a way of resealing with fresh, new superglue, and the bond becomes stronger than ever and is never foolishly broken again

D x "

I like this analogy very much. Our relationship has been different to most from the day we met (she was even reported as a missing person by her friends) and I was just happy to realise she was even more like me (even though I've never cheated) in the sexual deviancy category along with everything else we had in common.

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By *onnie And Clyde9070Couple
over a year ago

Leeds

"Depends on circumstances"

Maybe he was on here as a single male, discovered her profile with a couple of veri's and didn't like it lol.

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By *eady and Willing 9Man
over a year ago

Wherever the party is @

"Depends on circumstances"

This 100%. Isn't as easy as just saying do one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My friend just took back his girlfriend of 1 year: after finding out she fucked 2 other guys behind his back,,,, what would you do.

I’ve advised it’s a bad idea and will always be on your mind, but he doesn’t want to listen "

I’d have asked to join in next time

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"Not a chance in hell .

Once a cheat , always a cheat .

I cheated 27 years ago so does that really apply to all? I was young and stupid but I’m very different now.

I think it's a blanket generalisation that doesn't take other factors in to account."

That’s as maybe , but I know how my mind works . And I know I would be constantly wondering if she was going to do it again . Why did she do it to start with ? What did I do to deserve it ? What can I do to stop her wanting to do it again ? If she did it before m then why wouldn’t she’s do it again ? And so on ....

Why would I want to live my life with all this going on in my head ?

So it’s not a blanket generalisation taking other factors into account for me . So my answer remains the same .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never no matter what the circumstances were.Never x

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By *neeyedpirateMan
over a year ago

ask!

[Removed by poster at 09/04/18 18:13:08]

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By *ream3.14159Man
over a year ago

Here & there

"Not a chance in hell .

Once a cheat , always a cheat .

I cheated 27 years ago so does that really apply to all? I was young and stupid but I’m very different now. "

Same here I cheated 32 years ago and felt so guilty had to tell her, and that taught me a huge lesson, the trust was broken and the relationship was never like it was, I vowed I would never do it again once I saw how much it hurts the other person, never did again with subsequent relationships

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By *egin551Couple
over a year ago

south west !

No way

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By *s_bettyboopWoman
over a year ago

-3

One off maybe, full on affair no way!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why would I want to live my life with all this going on in my head ?

So it’s not a blanket generalisation taking other factors into account for me . So my answer remains the same ."

This is EXACTLY why i couldn’t forgive and forget.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For me it would depend on the circumstances.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes I would. I would also ask if I could watch next time....or at least make it part of our love life.

But maybe that’s why I’m single

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By *reokinkMan
over a year ago

London

Depends on the circumstances and if they were a non swinger. I think expecting monogomy from any partner is unrealistic.

However my stance with ones lover if you are both swingers is tougher. By definition I feel that once you embrace swinging into your lives. However big or small the role it plays honesty is all the more important and I see no reason why trust should need to be broken.

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By *reokinkMan
over a year ago

London

"It would entirely depend on the circumstances.

At the end of a long term relationship in which both people love each other some things are less significant when viewed from a distance. No point throwing the baby out with the bath water."

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Depends on the circumstances and if they were a non swinger. I think expecting monogomy from any partner is unrealistic.

I don't think expecting monogamy is unrealistic but even if it is I would still expect a certain degree of loyalty.

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By *reokinkMan
over a year ago

London

Never would I sleep with a cheat no matter how you justify your cheating and never would I cheat.

It's a hurtful mug that cheats.

This happens quite often. Some men on here are lucky enough to have a wife that is swinging with them, yet they still want to cheat. I don't get it."

What she said

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By *kyblue1878Couple
over a year ago

Southport

As a couple that swing together, why on earth would you have any reason to cheat ? Neither of us want a new partner and we can get as much varied sex as we like together.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never

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By *aughtynigel02121980Man
over a year ago

Brandon

One chance only here. Fuck it up and it's game over

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By *reokinkMan
over a year ago

London

"Depends on the circumstances and if they were a non swinger. I think expecting monogomy from any partner is unrealistic.

I don't think expecting monogamy is unrealistic but even if it is I would still expect a certain degree of loyalty."

To be fair I didn't really explain what I mean't properly. Some couples can remain monogamous because that is how they are wired. with others it can be cultural and religious pressures that keep them on the straight on narrow but at the expense of their happiness.

I have come to realize that monogamy doesn't work for me so it would be selfish of me to expect that from my partner. Its why when I felt ready to be in a loving relationship again. I made sure it was with someone like minded.

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By *ig1gaz1Man
over a year ago

bradford

No I couldnt trust them again, not to do the same again.

I wouldnt want the question hanging over my head that they might do it again.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Depends on the circumstances and if they were a non swinger. I think expecting monogomy from any partner is unrealistic.

I don't think expecting monogamy is unrealistic but even if it is I would still expect a certain degree of loyalty.

I see, I understand.

I too have learned enough about myself and relationships to know that I would be upfront from the start about what I wanted from life and love. I hope never to be in that position though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not long before we starting exploring swinging I gave my husband permission to sleep with others. This was not because I felt he wanted it, but because the incidence of cheating in the UK is so high, and I took the view that this meant there was a 50:50 chance of it happening to me. So if it did happen I would prefer it not to be behind my back. Giving him permission meant if he were to sleep with someone else, it would not be behind my back.

Mrs

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By *loswingersCouple
over a year ago

Gloucester

"Not long before we starting exploring swinging I gave my husband permission to sleep with others. This was not because I felt he wanted it, but because the incidence of cheating in the UK is so high, and I took the view that this meant there was a 50:50 chance of it happening to me. So if it did happen I would prefer it not to be behind my back. Giving him permission meant if he were to sleep with someone else, it would not be behind my back.

Mrs"

I can’t decide whether that was a good thing or not to be honest .

On the one hand you’ve accepted that there are loads who cheat so your hubby may be tempted too , so give him permission and it’s ok .

On the other , he may have had no desire to cheat , but with your blessing may be tempted ?

Or think that you have a motive , and gives you permission too , thus giving you freedom ....

Anyway , it worked so it’s all good

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"As a couple that swing together, why on earth would you have any reason to cheat ? Neither of us want a new partner and we can get as much varied sex as we like together. "

I personally think that with my partner, we would never cheat on each other, but I know for a fact there's a few people on here that are part of a couple yet totally willing and happy to cheat. It saddens me. That is one rule I would neve break when I played as a single fem, I would never meet just one half of a couple behind the others back.

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By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple

27....let them fuck away.

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By *tephenBunChowMan
over a year ago

Haywards heath/Waterlooville

Not a lot you can do apart support your friend.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Nope.

But then again, I don't think I could do monogamy again. All out in the open, no probs. Cheat? In the bin"

Exactly this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes and insist she did it more often xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mrs

I can’t decide whether that was a good thing or not to be honest .

On the one hand you’ve accepted that there are loads who cheat so your hubby may be tempted too , so give him permission and it’s ok .

On the other , he may have had no desire to cheat , but with your blessing may be tempted ?

Or think that you have a motive , and gives you permission too , thus giving you freedom ....

Anyway , it worked so it’s all good

I think I concluded at the time that the only reason I had originally expected sexual exclusivity was because society says so. But it didn’t really bother me personally. So when I removed societies expectations from my thought process there was no reason for me to demand sexual exclusivity. I don’t know if my freedom was subconsciously part of my thinking back then, but it probably has worked to my advantage.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Once a cheat always a cheat. Noway would i.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I did it in the past with my long term partner and it ruined me trying to forgive and move on 3 times over 7 years. Never ever again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Once a cheat always a cheat. Noway would i."

This isn't true, and it's such a narrow minded attitude to have. People have their reasons, people change and circumstances change.

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Yes

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By *izzaMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury

No, but saying that I have taken a gf back in the past and to be honest I never trusted her after that.

I became a paranoid mess, a different person. It's not worth it in my opinion, best your friend moves on and finds someone who will appreciate him.

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By *ap AdgeMan
over a year ago

Wirral

Facebook, cheaters paradise a ten years back my ex cheated on Facebook but it never worked out afterwards as she was hedging her bets with other guys.

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By *elsosreyxCouple
over a year ago

Southminster

"It would entirely depend on the circumstances.

At the end of a long term relationship in which both people love each other some things are less significant when viewed from a distance. No point throwing the baby out with the bath water.

I agree with this. I think the worst part about infidelity is the deceit....*if* you can sort out the communication issues then I think it's possible to move on from, but not easy. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No fuckin chance on earth would I.

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