FabSwingers.com forum: Overly complicated profiles

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What’s with all the damn War & Peace profiles?!!!

Makes it a chore to even look at some profiles... Geez

Example (Not actually someone’s profile)

**************************************

No single men, unless the following can be provided

Single men must message at the strike of midnight with the following password FALLEN SPARROW... Using old Russian dialect pre 16th century, you will outline the assault on K (35) ginger flaps pussy using longitude and latitude grid references, back-to-front to confuse the enemy in case a pattern is observed thus breaking the element of surprise attack!

Must be local

Have a 30” cock

Have balls like the Thames barrier

... If not

We will contact you... DO NOT contact us!

**********************************

Meh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We've got quite a long and detailed profile, it serves its purpose in a number of ways:

~ it's designed to give people a good impression of who we are and the kind of fun we're looking for.

~ if people are too lazy to spend 30 seconds reading it to find out more about us, then they're probably not interested in us as people, but just after a quick fuck and that's definitely not for us, so it works as a good filter in that way.

~ giving lots of information about us, gives people a starting point when they message, something to talk about.

I notice you've not been on the site long OP, you don't have any verifications (although by your own admission you don't leave them for others, so I doubt they'd go to the trouble of leaving them for you) and your profile says little about you. There are literally thousands of single guys on Fab, even with a well presented profile they often have trouble getting meets with people. Given your profile and the fact you post negative, complaining posts on the forums, I don't rate your chances very highly.

Good luck!

V x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't read overly long profiles. A paragraph or two is enough for me. I can read a couple of sentences and want to talk to the writer.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You clearly don't get a hundred messages a day from virtually blank profiles that say 'Hi. Wot u lookin 4 ?'

Which is what the profile aims to avoid happening.

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By *ransGuyTV/TS
over a year ago

Cardiff

My profile is quite long, it tells people what I want them to know and it's a good filter to find out how much effort a person is willing to make. If they can't be arsed to find out just a tiny bit about the person in photos they have just got hard over then how much effort are they going to make to meet me and have at least reasonably decent sex?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Long profiles are like boring people you work with that go on and on.... you stop listening after a while x

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"What’s with all the damn War & Peace profiles?!!!

Makes it a chore to even look at some profiles... Geez

Example (Not actually someone’s profile)

**************************************

No single men, unless the following can be provided

Must be local

Have a 30” cock

Have balls like the Thames barrier

... If not

We will contact you... DO NOT contact us!

**********************************

Meh

I guessing if taking all of 2 minutes to read a profile is too much of a chore for you... you are not for them and they are not for you

You could call it an “attention filter” if you want

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By *iversong321Woman
over a year ago

Preston/Merseyside

Id rather have a decent profile that tells me something about the person than one that tells me nothing. Even reading slowly it would only take a few minutes. At least it s out the instashag mentality. Same with messages - 'meet now?' Errr no.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You clearly don't get a hundred messages a day from virtually blank profiles that say 'Hi. Wot u lookin 4 ?'

Which is what the profile aims to avoid happening. "

Ours is pretty long but it doesn't stop the idiots from messaging. Longer ones are generally better to read as you get an idea of the person / people behind them and should at least be able to establish if you have some common ground.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bloody words, hey

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By *inkycouplespainCouple
over a year ago

Malaga Spain but sometimes Manchester and

Ours is long enough to tell people what we want from a meet. Hopefully put the wrong people off us who wont fit. Couple of paragraphs is all that is needed. Plus a few pics.

Too many profiles on here with silhouettes and one line profiles. Good luck with them.

D&K

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

If it's too ong for your liking OP then why worry about it? They're not for you, move on to the next one.

Yes it really is that simple

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What’s with all the damn War & Peace profiles?!!!

Makes it a chore to even look at some profiles... Geez

Example (Not actually someone’s profile)

**************************************

No single men, unless the following can be provided

Must be local

Have a 30” cock

Have balls like the Thames barrier

... If not

We will contact you... DO NOT contact us!

**********************************

Meh

Hey OP I thought it was funny...

Fallen Sparrow and 16th century Russian dialect tickled me

We have a fairly long profile to be fair I don’t think it’s a boring read....plus you know, because I’m like L’Oréal

MrsK

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By *ransGuyTV/TS
over a year ago

Cardiff

"You clearly don't get a hundred messages a day from virtually blank profiles that say 'Hi. Wot u lookin 4 ?'

Which is what the profile aims to avoid happening.

Very true. I've just had a friend request from a straight guy 130+ miles away, obviously my profile was just too long and hard for him to read

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I mean you're on a site that is about meeting others and sharing something very personal.

Some people have their reasons for long and complex profiles, so if you cannot even be bothered to take the time to read about someone I'm not sure why you'd expect them to meet you?

Personally I'm looking for something particular so have a longish profile to set the scene, and a much larger doc I can send to people interested with everything about me, toys, interests etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What’s with all the damn War & Peace profiles?!!!

Makes it a chore to even look at some profiles... Geez

Example (Not actually someone’s profile)

**************************************

No single men, unless the following can be provided

Must be local

Have a 30” cock

Have balls like the Thames barrier

... If not

We will contact you... DO NOT contact us!

**********************************

Meh

"
bottom line it was funny ,I know where you're coming from but posting this is like burning bridges ,profile info basically is about avoiding unwanted questions which are repeatedly asked over and over ,its not your fault you ask them because you don't know what's gone before but you will be blamed for asking them even so especially if answered in profile write up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Long profiles are generally guaranteed not to be fake I think.

The amount of obvious fake profiles popping up in my local updates feed is alarming.

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By *uzz And WoodyCouple
over a year ago

Maidstone

Poorly written short profiles do nothing for us. Just shows lack of effort and probably the same when in a playing scenario. You get no second chance when making a first impression.

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By *mm_n_ZedCouple
over a year ago

Fareham

Perhaps the site could design a voice recording facility to create audio profiles. This would save people the exhausting task of moving their eyes from left to right a few dozen times...

Sorted!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have tried a long informative profile..some people don't read them, we now have a short profile and some still don't bother to read it.

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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

My profile has grown longer in an attempt to answer some frequently asked questions and to address some issues.

It still gets ignored at times.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I recently cut my profile down in size considerably. If folk want to know more then they can always message me

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By *olarfoxMan
over a year ago

North Cambs

I guess it all depends on what you call consider to be 'overly long'

I like to think that I say enough to let people know a bit more about myself and what I am looking for so that this information can supplement any first introductory message I might send.

Do people consider my profile to long/complicate??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Our profile got longer as we found we didn’t really want to be wasting our time replying to unsuitable messages. A lot of guys have a bee in their bonnets about how rude ladies and couples are for not replying to messages. We pride ourselves in being polite people and don’t like being accused of being rude. So part of the solution was to write a very detailed description of what we’re about, so that people know whether it’s worthwhile messaging us. Then there if we ignore a message because they have ignored our profile, I think it’s reasobable to say we can’t be acused of being rude. This way we are giving people the chance of not wasting their time messaging us, and we’re not wasting our time replying to messages we never wanted. Everybody happy

Mrs

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By *xycpl699Couple
over a year ago

kilmarnock

"Long profiles are like boring people you work with that go on and on.... you stop listening after a while x"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A long profile and particularly an off putting first paragraph have served us very well, we don’t tend to get illiterate or poorly thought out messages and lazy people read the first paragraph and bolt or block

Win win

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We are also looking for something quite specific, so really that’s to be reflected in a man’s profile. We don’t like chatting on Fab and we have very little time for meets, therefore for a meet to be successful we are very reliant on an informative profile and informative verifications. It saves so much time in the long run.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A long profile and particularly an off putting first paragraph have served us very well, we don’t tend to get illiterate or poorly thought out messages and lazy people read the first paragraph and bolt or block

Win win

That’s the same with us, I think we’ve done a good job with putting off the people we don’t want to meet, but those we do want to meet seem to quite like our profile. Definately win win and less time wasting for everybody!

Mrs

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

Come on guys. You know what the op was getting at. Bloody funny post and hes having a teasing dig at the brigade who demand practically the master race and get you to go through a lord of the rings type adventure just to then get ignored anyway. It put a smile on my face anyways

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What’s with all the damn War & Peace profiles?!!!

Makes it a chore to even look at some profiles... Geez

Example (Not actually someone’s profile)

**************************************

No single men, unless the following can be provided

Must be local

Have a 30” cock

Have balls like the Thames barrier

... If not

We will contact you... DO NOT contact us!

**********************************

Meh

I guessing if taking all of 2 minutes to read a profile is too much of a chore for you... you are not for them and they are not for you

You could call it an “attention filter” if you want

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What’s with all the damn War & Peace profiles?!!!

Makes it a chore to even look at some profiles... Geez

Example (Not actually someone’s profile)

**************************************

No single men, unless the following can be provided

Must be local

Have a 30” cock

Have balls like the Thames barrier

... If not

We will contact you... DO NOT contact us!

**********************************

Meh

Balls like the Thames Barrier

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By *otlovefun42Couple
over a year ago

Costa Blanca Spain...

I suppose ours is getting a bit long now, but it didn't start out like that.

It was quite short at the beginning but we just kept adding to it based on our experiences on here, mostly reading and deleting messages from people we had no interest in whatsoever.

One day we will re-write it.

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By *ieman300Man
over a year ago

Best Greggs in Cheshire East

Win win

I don't get it. I read the whole thing. It's actually a great bit of text. But I don't see how you can consider people stopping reading before the end of the first paragraph lazy. It's not immediately obvious it's a piss take. There are enough alarm bells to scare anyone off! A single lady with her thousands of mails to check would probably stop reading after a couple of lines.

Still you say it works so what do I know. As i said fantastic profile once you get past that paragraph.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What’s with all the damn War & Peace profiles?!!!

Makes it a chore to even look at some profiles... Geez

Example (Not actually someone’s profile)

**************************************

No single men, unless the following can be provided

Must be local

Have a 30” cock

Have balls like the Thames barrier

... If not

We will contact you... DO NOT contact us!

**********************************

Meh

There are two types of profile text that make me click away. The first type are the ones that people have added to and/or edited, but have repeated themselves a few times in the text or who have contradicted themselves; ie at the beginning of a couple's profile it says that the fem is curious about her bi side, but by the time you get to the end of the profile, she is looking solely for fem on fem action.

The second type of profile that makes me move swiftly on is one that says 'fill in later', especially if they have been on the site a while. It's nice to have an idea what people are offering/looking for, it saves a protracted Q&A session, which, by the time you finish and have decided that you don't want to meet after all, you run the risk of getting a snot-a-gram from the other people accusing you of being time-wasters.

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By *.gerri.xTV/TS
over a year ago

North west

"you will outline the assault on K (35) ginger flaps pussy using longitude and latitude grid references, back-to-front to confuse the enemy in case a pattern is observed thus breaking the element of surprise attack! D"

4 d3 LuLz

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By *oul BrothaMan
over a year ago

A Galaxy far far away

OP nailed it. I have a long profile, as I want to show off my personality. In fact, that's probably what's holding me back.

I should just make it short and sweet, and flood it with cock pics.

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By *eek2findMan
over a year ago

Wigan

The more indepth the profile the more time the user has taken to talk about themselves. I think that's a good thing to be honest.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Must be local...what a load of sh!te that is..EVERYONE is local,to them self aren't they ?!

And whats with these copyright,trademark,universities do not use my profile as a case study statements,yaawwwnnn

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By *otSoNewWalesCoupleCouple
over a year ago

South Wales

"What’s with all the damn War & Peace profiles?!!!

Makes it a chore to even look at some profiles... Geez

Example (Not actually someone’s profile)

**************************************

No single men, unless the following can be provided

Must be local

Have a 30” cock

Have balls like the Thames barrier

... If not

We will contact you... DO NOT contact us!

**********************************

Meh

Not a fan of humour then?

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By *ightboy69Man
over a year ago

Torquay

the worse bit is when someone asks you to put a KEYWORD in the subject box !

Good god get a grip .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Let's be honest, most profiles say the same thing anyway. I'd much rather chat to someone who has a short blurb on his profile, that drew me in, or his pics were to my taste. Wittering on about what they want, what they can do, their hobbies, pushing boundaries, like minded people blah, blah, blah, turns my brain to mush.

Short and sweet, with a nice face does it for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"OP nailed it. I have a long profile, as I want to show off my personality. In fact, that's probably what's holding me back.

I should just make it short and sweet, and flood it with cock pics."

Your first paragraph would have been enough to get me chatting. From the horse's mouth is my preferred method.

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

I don't think mine is war and peace but I have been told its too long before. I always think if they cant spend 1 minute 12 seconds to read it they're not my kind of guy anyway

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't think mine is war and peace but I have been told its too long before. I always think if they cant spend 1 minute 12 seconds to read it they're not my kind of guy anyway

It took me a lot longer than that

But then I did keep on going back and forth between the words and the pics...

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By *ev and TrevCouple
over a year ago

cardiff

"Our profile got longer as we found we didn’t really want to be wasting our time replying to unsuitable messages. A lot of guys have a bee in their bonnets about how rude ladies and couples are for not replying to messages. We pride ourselves in being polite people and don’t like being accused of being rude. So part of the solution was to write a very detailed description of what we’re about, so that people know whether it’s worthwhile messaging us. Then there if we ignore a message because they have ignored our profile, I think it’s reasobable to say we can’t be acused of being rude. This way we are giving people the chance of not wasting their time messaging us, and we’re not wasting our time replying to messages we never wanted. Everybody happy

Mrs"

This. It states twice in our profile that we can't/don't meet last minute. So when we get a message saying 'meet now' I'm quite happy to delete without a reply.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have tried a number of different "write-ups" - from the lengthy & eloquent to the short and sharp. To be perfectly honest - I reckon around 1 person in 20 actually reads the whole profile (you can tell by messages from those people clearly unsuitable if they had read the profile). So, don't think it makes a jot of difference what you put - if someone likes the look of my missus from the public photos - they message ! x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had a number of different write ups and nobody has messaged me, but then I know all the answers to Ginger's flap size lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rather happy with length and girth of mine,profile that is

Bit like Ronseal,does what it says,and i do get a few complements on it now and then

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By *eek2findMan
over a year ago

Wigan

Each to their own. Regardless, you're the one messaging. It's not as if they're going to notice someone not messaging them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Doesn't matter what the text bit says. Most just look at pics or mail everyone online in a 50 mile radius in the hope of a reply.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What’s with all the damn War & Peace profiles?!!!

Makes it a chore to even look at some profiles... Geez

Example (Not actually someone’s profile)

**************************************

No single men, unless the following can be provided

Must be local

Have a 30” cock

Have balls like the Thames barrier

... If not

We will contact you... DO NOT contact us!

**********************************

Meh

Funny though. You could write me a new lengthy epic profile.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's about selling yourself op the more people know the more informed an opinion they can make on wether your worth messaging and building a rapport and then meeting but I'm guessing you stopped reading this after the first few words lol

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By *reedy_for_funCouple
over a year ago

My House

I have to say, I don't really give a flying f**k about those that don't like our profile, the length of it or what pictures we decide to show.

I had fun writing it, hopefully it appeals to the certain kind of people that we think we would have something in common with.

Those that don't like it, the pics, or our veri's, care much?

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By *lceeWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Mine is pretty long because I’m a chatterbox. You have to have a lot of patience and a strong will to pit up with me, so my profile is a fair warning system. I don’t think it’s complicated though, so it’s got that going for it at least!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Mine is pretty long because I’m a chatterbox. You have to have a lot of patience and a strong will to pit up with me, so my profile is a fair warning system. I don’t think it’s complicated though, so it’s got that going for it at least!"
and u like a nice bum x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Come on guys. You know what the op was getting at. Bloody funny post and hes having a teasing dig at the brigade who demand practically the master race and get you to go through a lord of the rings type adventure just to then get ignored anyway. It put a smile on my face anyways

This guy is intelligent... Lighten up peeps! It was a tongue in cheek observation. Write what you want, live your lives

But understand when someone is joking

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Win win

Still you say it works so what do I know. As i said fantastic profile once you get past that paragraph."

Maybe if they’ve no sense of humour and lack a bit of intellect they’d not suss fairly early on that it’s a piss take, it also acts as a great filter against those that actually display some of the traits mentioned, we’ve had a few saying they were offended by it, how ironic

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like to read something to get an idea of someone. Depending on how good someone is with words it doesn't have to be overly long to get the message across.

Long, rambling and negative profiles are very boring and I move on quickly. And I think the hurdles some people specify are quite daft, usually to deter men. They should use filters and then approach the people they want to talk to.

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