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My amusing lunch time

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By *ipin Cider OP   Man
over a year ago

Warick & London

So just a little insight first.

As I work in the Medical industry I have to get regular tests bloods etc etc and today was one those days with a little difference.

As I’m getting a little older I decided I would have my fertility checked along with all the other normal bits I have done. Well you do never know what is round the corner do you and I was just wondering if the little swimmers were all in order if the need came up in the future.

So how was my lunch time....

So I enter the clinic and went in to a little area what I’d like to call the dry hand room (male specimen room)

Fill in a form and patiently wait - analyse the other people waiting...

Wonder how long I should take in the room? Do I spend the same amount of time in the room as the last person? Sit and wonder was he too quick? Can I last that long? Oh god this is a tough one.

Got the call to go to the “quiet room” but what if I want to get all noisy?

Grab the pot and confirm that it’s me on the label and then enter the room.

Ah the mood lightening, soft music playing, comfy bed waiting for me, range of reading material..... god I have got a good imagination.

Clinical bed, box of magazines and that is all.

So what have I learnt from lunch time?

- the editorial content of Hustler is far superior to Readers wives

- late 1990’s had a fashion for the partial tuft

- Anne 24 from Northampton probably isn’t 24 which got me thinking was she actually from Northampton?

- Silvia 38 from Newcastle could do with some Braces to straighten these teeth a little

- the hot topic in Hustler was what was the most romantic thing your man had done... I mean come on that isn’t the first place I’d look for inspiration.

Little knock on the door to ask if I’m alright... to be answered with all good here Julie just got carried away reading the latest passionate episode of Mary and the maintenance man and wondering if she would or wouldn’t.

Ah yes back to the matter in Hand, so to speak ???? ....

Finish what I had started, dab the sweat from the forehead and tidy myself up a little.

Out of the quiet room and a little knock on the hatch to see a bearded guy smiling back at me.

“Did you collect all of the sample?”

“Why you ask Greg? Do I still have a little on my moustache?”

So yeah start to finish 8 minutes including the before clean and the after hand wash.

Now I think it is time for a fag a quick drink and a little sleep. Exhausting lunch time I can tell you.

Worse part of all of it was £2.70 for the bloody Parking!

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By *lkDomWhtSubBiCpleCouple
over a year ago

Somewhere / Everywhere /Kinksville

Cool story

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

So...what was the outcome?

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor

This thread really deserved more attention!

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By *lceeWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Ha! I always wondered how those little rooms looked!

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By *heorgasmaddictMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

Haha great story

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

OP why should the NHS pay to get your fertility checked just because you feel like it?

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By *hickennchipsWoman
over a year ago

up above the streets and houses

This made me chuckle

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"OP why should the NHS pay to get your fertility checked just because you feel like it?"

Why not? You go for free sexual health tests just because you want to have risky sex with random multiple partners, don't you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I thought that was very amusing.

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By *ipin Cider OP   Man
over a year ago

Warick & London

The NHS don’t pay for any of my check ups tests or the such like.

I pay for private healthcare and any other tests required for work or personal come out of my own pocket.

I believe in leaving NHS care for those who don’t have any other choice.

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By *ipin Cider OP   Man
over a year ago

Warick & London

It was all good in the “pot” so to speak.

The boys are fine and active

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By *gnitemybodyWoman
over a year ago

Onestepoutofthedoor


"It was all good in the “pot” so to speak.

The boys are fine and active "

Excellent,go forth and multiply!

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By *eliz NelsonMan
over a year ago

The Tantric Tea Shop


"It was all good in the “pot” so to speak.

The boys are fine and active

Excellent,go forth and multiply!"

Now I am stuck with that image from the Woody Allen film with the little sperms lining up

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By *ipin Cider OP   Man
over a year ago

Warick & London

Go forth yes... multiply... not yet.

For now it is bagged and tagged

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

im just been swimming

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think I'm off to shave my moustache

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